Original subtitles

The following program is brought to you in living color on NBC.

Virginia City, folks.

Hey, Hoss, we got a couple more sacks of spuds in there to get.

Hoss? We got some more potatoes inside we gotta get.

Joe, I just seen the most beautiful sight,

the most beautiful woman I ever saw in my life.

Oh, what a quaint hamlet.

I don't know what you mean by quaint hamlet, miss,

but Virginia City folks are mighty proud of their city.

Well, Miss Denise only meant to say...

My darling man, I just mean its, um, rustic charm is, uh, quaint.

Yeah.

Still, I wouldn't use that word "quaint" around here, miss.

We take it as someone...

being a little... squirrelly.

Andre. Andre?

Andre, come back.

- Oh, come back, Andre. - I'll get him.

Andre.

Oh, Andre, please come back!

Hah!

Ma'am. Ma'am.

- I found your dog. - Oh!

Oh, you naughty dog. Don't you ever do that again, never.

I'm so thankful. Oh, you saved my little Andre.

Oh, it wasn't nothin', ma'am.

I just run him around the block, cornered him back there in the alley,

picked him up and there he is.

I can never thank you enough.

Mr... Mr...?

Cartwright, ma'am, Hoss Cartwright, and, like I said, there wasn't nothin' to it.

I'm... I'm sorry I couldn't have been more help to you, ma'am,

but I found the dog's bow.

Merci. You're both so kind.

My name is Joe Cartwright.

His name is Little Joe Cartwright.

'Cause I'm the youngest. That's why they say that.

I am Mademoiselle Denise.

- Brothers? - Occasionally.

I'm glad your dog fell into friendly hands again.

Ah, Fillmore, this gentleman captured little Andre.

This gentleman found his bow.

I'm Hoss Cartwright and this is my little brother, Little Joe Cartwright.

Good, good, good. I'm Mr. Fillmore.

I'm manager and accompanist for Miss Denise.

I believe you and I have met.

Yeah, I'm sorry about that little accident.

Fillmore.

Such kindness should be rewarded, Fillmore.

Oh, yes, yes.

Miss Denise is a famous chanteuse

and we'd be delighted to have you as our guests tonight.

A chant-oose?

I didn't know they had that kind of thing going on here in Virginia City.

I sing.

And Monsieur Fillmore, um, accompanies me on the piano.

Oh.

Well, I’ll tell you, you'll just have to forgive my little brother here, ma'am.

You see, the finer things in life he just ain't too familiar with.

- You don't know what a chant-oose is. - Shut up.

Here. Here we are.

There are two tickets for tonight at the, um, the Silver Dollar.

- Well, thank you very... much. - That's... That's one for each.

- Very kind of you. - Very nice of you indeed.

I will see you tonight.

I can guarantee you're gonna see me.

I mean we will be there.

Bonjour, gentlemen.

- Bonjour. - Same to you, ma'am.

Fillmore.

You didn't know what a chant-oose was, you phony.

We gotta get to work. Come on.

"Get to work, come on."

Got everything all loaded except them spuds.

Good.

- Thank you. - Thank you.

- You bet. - Hmm.

- What’s the matter? - Hmm?

- I said what's the matter? - Oh, nothing.

I'm just trying to make up my mind

whether I wanna go to this or whether I wanna sell my ticket.

I don't know. I really don't think too much of chanteuses, really.

- I don't know. - You mean you don't wanna go see her?

Not if I can sell my ticket, no, I wouldn't go.

Well, I’ll... I'll tell you, just to save you the trouble

of having to sell it somewhere, I'll buy it from you.

- Do you wanna buy it? - Yeah. Keep it in the family, yeah.

This ticket's worth a lot of money.

Of course, I won't charge you that kind of money. We’re brothers.

Ten dollars. How's that?

Eight.

Yeah, sold.

Besides, this ought to cut out some of the competition for you.

Well, I... I will admit you've been a nuisance, little brother.

You don't know how to handle yourself in a situation like this,

them chanteuses and all.

Besides that, you're a little light for the job.

You're about eight dollars light for the job.

Ah.

Ah, good.

Come in.

Oh.

Baby.

Well, I looked over the Silver Dollar Saloon.

Oh, please, Fillmore, you know I don't like the word "saloon."

Well, never mind how you feel about saloons.

Just don't lose the French accent.

Oh, well, how was it, huh?

About this animal...

Oh, he loves you, Fillmore.

Yeah, he loves me, but he's a pest.

The Silver Dollar doesn't seem too bad,

and the advance sale seems to indicate a sellout.

Heavy on the French, huh?

Well, it's selling big this year, so play it up.

I also learned that our newfound friends, the Cartwrights,

are pretty important people around here.

Oh?

Well, as long as I'm going to be around here for a few days,

I might as well...

enjoy myself, huh, chéri?

Don't start toying with those two boys, huh?

Oh, manager, how you worry.

I wonder how long a dog lives.

What do you mean by that?

Well, as your manager and accompanist,

it seems to me that I spend an awful lot of time

looking for Andre when he's missing.

Please, Fillmore, do not talk like that in front of Andre.

- He is so sensitive. - All right.

Only don't lose the French accent.

Oui, monsieur. We will be very French, Andre, baby, hmm, baby?

- I must say you look pretty good. - You like it, huh?

A neated-up version of Hoss Cartwright, something special.

Yeah, well, like I was telling you, this Miss Denise is something special, Pa.

I appreciate you taking me as your guest.

My pleasure, Pa, my pleasure.

I just hate to leave without knowing where Little Joe is.

Don't worry about Little Joe. Let's get on in.

I don't wanna be late for the performance.

Hey, see, Pa? Here's the ticket.

Not only is she beautiful...

but she's talented and she's world famous.

See that?

I see your little brother got top dollar for his ticket, didn't he?

Hey, I wonder if that little skinflint

knew how cheap these tickets were gonna go for.

You know what I ought to do with you?

Just put you in a corral and leave you there.

Evening, Ben.

Hoss.

Evening, Hoss.

Oh, hi, fella.

Oh, um... Uh, evening, Pa. I didn't see you standing behind Hoss.

Well, got yourself a new suit, huh?

- Yeah, I figured it was about time. - New hat too.

Yeah. Nice, huh?

You, uh, you mind if we sit down?

I don't know if you can read the sign. It says "reserved."

Course, that doesn't go for you, Pa.

Don't you give me none of that reserved stuff.

I could call the bouncer, you know, if I thought it would do any good.

I wondered where you'd sneaked off to.

All right, now that you've seated yourself here, all right,

but as soon as Miss Denise has finished her performance,

I hope you will extend me the courtesy of leaving my table.

For what?

Isn't it obvious that she and I would like to be alone?

Ladies and gentlemen.

Ladies and gentlemen, tonight I am proud to present to Virginia City,

direct from Europe and New York,

the beautiful singing star, Miss Denise.

- Ain't she something, Pa? - Sure is.

She's crazy about me.

Hey, would you mind moving over a little bit? I'd like to see the show.

Pa, will you ask him to please move aside?

I paid for my ticket, you know.

- We have a table right here. - Oh, merci.

Miss Denise, I'd like you to meet my father, Mr. Cartwright.

- Miss Denise. - Miss Denise.

- I enjoyed your singing tremendously. - You're gonna get it.

It's my pleasure, Mr. Cartwright.

May I introduce my manager and accompanist, Monsieur Fillmore?

- Enjoyed it. - Pleasure, sir.

Excuse me, please. I have to go count the money.

- Won't you sit down? - Yes, have my seat, Miss Denise.

- Merci. - I like it.

Oh, Little Joe, would you do me a favor?

It'd be my pleasure, ma'am.

Would you go... to my, um, hotel...

and see if little Andre is all right?

- See if little Andre is all right? - Oui.

Hoss, you wouldn't like to go see if...?

No, you wouldn't.

Yeah, well, I'll... I'll just be a moment. I'll be right back.

Merci, Little Joe.

Don't go away.

What a darling boy.

I never thought of him in exactly those terms.

Yes, he is, isn't he?

Where’s that young fella who ordered the champagne?

- He stepped out for just a minute. - Coming back?

Oh, yes, he'll be... Just set it down here.

I'd better hold off on this champagne. He already paid me.

Whoa. Excuse me. You say he already paid for it?

I'm his older brother and I'll take good care of the bottle. Just set it down.

- No, I... - Sir, please.

Just get us another glass, will you?

Well, if you're his brother, I guess it's all right.

Yeah. Thank you.

- I'll just go right ahead and open it. - Oh, là là. I just love champagne.

- It's so French. - Yes, it is.

I love it. It's marvelous, so lively, you know?

What a shame.

Well...

- Hoss... - At least a glass left.

Oui.

Your aim was bad.

What are you doin'?

Qu'est-ce qu'il y a?

Up and at 'em, tiger. Go on.

That's a better show than ours.

Check the dog. Check the dog.

Andre, you all right?

Check.

It's so exciting.

Oh, here he comes...

- Come on. You can do it again. - Go.

Hey. Hey, you all right?

Hey, watch my suit, will you?

Hoss, don't you know not...

not to shake up a bottle of champagne?

I do now, Pa.

Ah, ha-ha!

It didn't really make no difference, though, Pa.

Little Joe had already paid for it anyhow.

What’s all the ruckus, Little Joe?

Watch out!

Looks like Pa and Hoss are in there really busting the place up.

They're doing all right too, ain't they?

Do you reckon I'd better break it up now?

I reckon.

I sure hate to.

The sheriff. Out.

He just... He just went right by.

Now I've seen it all.

Hello, Roy.

Well, it's kind of silly.

Yes, it is, now that you mention it.

Yeah, well, I really would like to explain.

Now, there's no need of that.

I think a collection of hard cash to pay for the damages done to the saloon

would be a better way of explaining it.

- Good night. - Night, Roy.

Is this the bottle of champagne that I already paid for?

Yeah, that... that's the one all right. I...

Uh, Hoss can... can explain what, uh, what happened to it.

- Can't you? - Yeah.

"Yeah." Yeah, well, go ahead and explain.

Well, you already paid for it, Joe.

I didn't figure there was any use in wasting it, so I...

I tell you, you... you shake that French champagne and it sure does get excited.

It blows its stack.

- Hey... - Joseph...

- Don't do this to yourself, boy. - Now, Joseph, you...

It's your new suit. Don't mess it up.

I... I wanna tell you something.

If I didn't have on this new suit and my new hat,

I would give you the licking that you deserve.

Oh, you... As I was saying, Miss Denise,

I'm terribly sorry about what happened the other night.

Oh, I thought it was exciting.

And the way Ben and Hoss handled the situation,

it was magnifique.

He's gonna get a magnifique bill for the... for the damages.

Oh.

Too bad you miss it.

Yeah, I'm sorry too. I... If I could have been there, I could have really...

Oh, excusez-moi.

Oh, certainly.

Whew.

- Hoss Cartwright. - Hi, Miss Denise.

- Do come in. - I brung you some...

Flowers. How sweet.

Is he bothering you?

Oh, no.

I, uh, just wanted to show Miss Denise

that we're all not ruffians and brawlers.

Sit down, Hoss, and keep Little Joe company

while I get a vase for these flowers.

Yes.

You don't sleep much, do you?

I think you're a little late with the...

Yeah.

But... I'm a box of bonbons ahead.

Hey, you see that?

Even Andre has caught on to your way of operating.

You know what they say about animals. They always know.

Well, you're so big, he probably thinks you're a tree.

Could I impose on one of you boys to do me a favor and...

- Oh... - Ma'am, I'd...

I'd be happy to oblige you any way I could.

Oh, thank you, Hoss. Little Andre did not have his morning walk.

Do you mind?

Oh, of course my brother Hoss doesn't mind. Loves animals.

Why, he'd rather walk dogs than eat. Wouldn't you, Hoss?

Merci, Hoss. I'll get his leash, huh?

Yeah.

I'll flip you to see who walks him.

What do you mean, you'll flip me to see who walks him?

You just said it yourself. Animals know.

Little brother, you're trying me. You're trying me real hard.

Not as bad as the people of Virginia City are gonna try you

when they see you being pulled around by that funny-looking little dog.

- Mornin'. - Morning.

How are you?

Nice mornin'.

Morning, Martha, Jack.

Oh, Hoss.

Oh, Hoss.

Oh, Hoss, glad to see you.

- Howdy, Roy. - Did... Did your pa come into town?

No, no, he didn't, Roy. He stayed out at the ranch.

Oh, that's too bad. You going home for supper, ain't you?

Well, I sort of figured on it.

Yeah, well, I...

Dad burn it. I got the dadburnedest frog in my throat.

Sounds more like you got a dog in your throat.

Yeah.

Well, you tell your pa...

I found an itch that goes with it.

I reckon it must be some kind of allergy or something.

Oh, that's too bad.

But tell him the next time he comes into town

to stop into my office and see me, will you?

- I sure will, Roy. I sure will. - Thank you.

- So long, Roy. - Bye.

Oh! Oh, I'm sorry. I... I wasn't watching where I was going.

You wasn't looking what you were doing last night.

But I'm purely glad we bumped into each other

without your pa around to get in the way.

Now, look, that was last night.

- Now, if you would just... - Right, and this is today.

You had your good time...

and now I'm gonna have mine.

These bonbons are wonderful.

- Here. Would you like one? - No, merci.

Hoss has been gone a long time.

Oh, I wouldn't worry. You know what my pa always says?

Well, he says if a job's worth doing, it's worth doing well.

It has been over one hour,

and Andre tires so easily.

Oh.

Look, I don't want you to worry about him.

Hoss is probably... probably just going around town showing Andre to everybody.

That must be him.

Oh, excusez-moi.

Yes, yes.

I, uh...

Miss Denise, you... you ain't gonna believe this.

I, uh...

I lost your... Andre.

- You what? - I... I lost the little doggy.

- You lost him? - Yeah.

- My An... My bébé. - But he won't be very far.

- We’ll find him. - No, no, no, no, Miss Denise.

Miss Denise, please, please don't worry. I'll find Andre for you.

- Don't worry. - That's right, Miss Denise.

Don't you worry. I'll find him.

- May I make a suggestion? - Oui.

Why don't we put an ad in the paper and offer a reward for Andre?

That is an excellent idea. I was just about to suggest that myself.

You just make the reward. I'll pay it.

It makes no difference. Just make a reward for...

I don't think it fair that we decide how much the reward should be.

After all, it is your dog, your love.

I think we should leave it up to Miss Denise what the reward should be.

Good idea. I was just about to suggest it myself.

You just make out the reward for whatever you think is fair

and... and I'll pay it.

Oh, merci, monsieur. Oh, thank you. Oui.

The reward was my idea.

- Oh, merci. - It was nothing.

Miss Denise, I'm paying the reward.

Miss Denise.

- Miss Denise. - Have a bonbon.

I will go put that ad in the paper right away.

Oh, oh, oui, monsieur.

Oh, and he's worth so much more to me than he cost.

Oh, don't worry about money. My brother Hoss is very generous.

Oh, oui, monsieur. Oh, merci, merci.

- Spare no expense, dear. - Oui.

Enjoy the bonbons.

What’s the matter, Pa? You look kind of tired.

I'm just not used to the kind of shenanigans we had last night.

And I hurt all over.

Wait till we get the bill from the Silver Dollar.

It's gonna be a big bill too. Lot of damage.

All those tables, chairs, bottles.

I'm sure glad you taught me not to get involved in those kind of things.

You know, Pa, you weren't the only one involved in that.

The rest of 'em ought to have to pay their share too.

I think you ought to pay at least half.

Where's he gonna get the money to pay for at least half?

Well, the same place he's gonna get the money to pay the reward.

What reward?

Reward for what?

Pa, see, I... I lost Miss Denise's little dog.

And Little Joe here thought that the least I could do

was to run an ad in the paper and offer a reward for him, since I lost him.

A reward for a dog? What kind of reward are you offering?

Well, I... I don't... I don't rightly know.

See, she was putting the ad in the paper while I was out hunting the dog,

and I... I didn't state no exact figure.

You let her state an exact figure?

Well...

Yeah, I reckon I did, Pa.

You know, Miss Denise thinks the world of that dog.

That’s a very unusual dog, very expensive.

I wouldn't be surprised if the reward for that dog

ran maybe 10, maybe 15 dollars.

- Well, I reckon I can live with that. - A pound.

You mean neither one of you have seen the ad, neither one?

No. Paper wasn't printed when we left town.

This is too much for me. Excuse me. I'll go to bed.

- Yeah. - Night, Pa.

- I think I'll join him. - No, I wouldn't if I were you.

How come?

I think you'd better get in town,

start looking before the stampede starts.

What stampede?

The stampede to get the reward money for that dog

that you're gonna have to pay.

Yeah.

Might as well. I don't reckon I could sleep anyhow wondering.

Hey, don't forget to take a lantern.

It's hard to find a little dog in the dark.

Here, Andre! Here! Here!

Here, Andre! Here!

Here, doggy, doggy, doggy, doggy.

Come here, Ann-dre.

Here, doggy, doggy, doggy, dog...

Any luck?

You... You looking for that dog so you can collect that fortune, huh?

You heard about it, huh?

I didn't think anyone knew about it yet, except the printer. That's me.

A big fat thousand dollars riding on that little carcass.

I plan to earn it.

Here, Ann-dre.

Ann-dre!

Ann-dre.

Here, Ann-dre.

Here, Andre. Here.

Come on, Andre.

Andre. Here, Andre.

Here, here. Here, Andre.

Here. Here, boy. Come on. Come on, pup.

Here I am. Andre.

This town looks awful deserted, don't it?

Well, never mind.

You take the horses to the livery stable and I'll meet you there later.

I'm going to pay the bill.

11 assorted bottles...

The courthouse burned down two years ago.

Wonder you ain't trying to charge me for that.

Well, Ben, just finished adding up the bad news.

Since it was mainly Cartwrights against Big Man here and his friends,

I figure each side ought to pay half.

Well, I guess that's reasonable.

Them friends you were talking about, I don't even know who they were.

Two Cartwrights and only one of me.

I figure he ought to pay two thirds of the damage.

- Here's our half. - Thank you, Ben.

You don't stick me with half, Cartwright.

You and me are gonna settle right now.

Here, Andre.

Andre? Come on, boy. Come on, boy.

Come on, pup.

What’s the matter? No luck?

Yeah, yeah, all kinds of luck.

Hey, where is everybody? There's nobody even in the livery stable.

Everybody that's got any legs is out looking for that dadburn dog

to collect that thousand-dollar reward, thanks to you.

A thousand? She put a thousand dollars' reward on that little dog?

That's right. A thousand dollars.

Oh, gee, I'm... I'm sorry.

I had no idea at all she was gonna put that kind of money on the dog.

If you're so sorry, how come you ain't out helping me find him?

Well, I would help you look,

but then... but then if I found the dog, then you'd owe me a thousand dollars,

and I... I couldn't live with myself knowing you owed me that kind of money.

Don't... Don't feel bad. You have enough to worry about.

I'm gonna go console Miss Denise.

She must need someone desperately about now.

Here, Andre.

53 glasses, seven chairs, three tables...

This is gonna take quite some time to figure out, Ben.

Miss Andre.

Mmm.

Andre. Andre!

I see you found the dog.

- Yeah, yeah, Pa. - Yeah.

- What happened to you? - Never mind what happened to me.

- Get that dog right back to that woman. - Yes, sir.

That Big Man's got a chin like an anvil.

Now, now, now, now, now, don't cry.

- Somebody'll find Andre. - Oh, yes.

Had nothing to eat for hours.

- Poor thing. - Poor thing?

Is that all you can say? Poor thing?

Oh, Denise, you're just upset, that's all.

Fillmore, if you had one little concern about Andre,

you would be out there looking for him.

You know, Miss Denise is right, Fillmore.

The poor little pup could be starving somewhere.

Now, if Little Joe is willing to show me around the town,

I'll be happy to hunt for Andre.

How would I know what a nice dog like that would be doing in a town like this?

Fillmore is right.

If you care for me at all, Little Joe, you would be out, oui?

Oui.

Oh! Oh.

Oh, oh.

Here he is, safe and sound.

Oh, my naughty little boy.

Oh, I will never let you out of my sight again, never.

Oh, baby.

As for you...

That is for being careless.

- Oh, that poor, poor beautiful dog. - Baby, baby.

- Oh, look how hungry he looks. - Yeah.

Let's buy him a steak.

Little Joe, Andre will love you forever.

- Oh, and I'm gonna love Andre. - Oh, give me kiss.

- Come on, dear. - Excusez-moi.

- Pardon me, brute. - Baby.

Come on, I'll buy you a beer.

I don't know whether I need a beer or a beefsteak.

Little Joe, that hat.

- It's a hat. - I have got to try it on.

- Do you mind? - Mm-hm. Oh.

Hey, Hoss, isn't that the fella who...?

- Yeah. - Watch this, kid.

I'm gonna get one of those Cartwrights by hook or crook.

Sit down, Mr. Fillmore. This is gonna be interesting.

But, look, that... that guy's twice the size of your brother.

Yeah, ain't it terrible?

That's nice.

You're a Cartwright, aren't you?

Hmm? Yeah, yeah, Joe Cartwright. Nice to...

Little Joe, stop picking on that man and go find my Andre.

Oh.

Andre, come back!

What are you just sitting there for? Why don't you help me?

I'm tired, little brother. That’ll teach you to be so careless. Go catch him.

Go on. You'll have a ball.

Oh, Andre.

I'll get him!

Hey, Andre?

You lose your horse, Little Joe? You wanna ride home with Hop Sing?

No, no, no. I got troubles, Hop Sing. You go on ahead.

Boy, are you lucky. Are you lucky.

Do you realize that if somebody else had found that dog,

you'd have been out a thousand dollars now,

a thousand dollars which you do not have?

Nobody knows any better than I do, Pa.

I sure hope you've learned your lesson.

I learned my lesson all right.

The only thing is, I... I don't know about Little Joe.

I don't know whether he learned his lesson or not.

Tell him about the fight, Joe.

What fight?

Uh, fight.

Oh, yeah, I was talking to Bruno yesterday

and he told me you had another fight over there in the Silver Dollar

and you broke a whole bunch of bottles.

Joe, that ain't the fight I was talking about.

Tell Pa about your fight.

Your fight?

Tell him about the window, Joe. Tell him about the whole thing.

What window? What fight and what window?

Well, the window over there in the, uh, in the... millinery shop.

There's a window in it and I was sitting there watching Miss Denise's little dog.

Oh, that dog again.

And, well, she was inside trying on a hat.

You know how women are. They love to try on hats.

I know you know about women.

And, uh, well, that Big Man that you had all the trouble with

came up and he punched me right through the window,

and when I went through it, it broke...

and, uh, I mashed a whole bunch of them little hats

and I busted up this... this kind of dummy in there,

and a corset got unstrung and...

And you don't have any money to pay for any of this damage, do you?

I don't have any money to pay for it.

You don't have any money.

That Big Man is costing me a fortune, just a fortune.

- What are you so happy about? - Hop Sing happy, very happy.

Yes, I can see that.

I could use a little happiness right now. What's it all about?

Have hunch what make me happy is make Mr. Hoss more unhappy.

You see, Hop Sing going to be rich, very rich.

Hop Sing, how do you figure that whatever will make you very rich

will make me unhappy?

- I don't understand. - Hop Sing earn a lot of money.

Well, don’t be so inscrutable. What is it? What?

How did you earn a lot of money?

- Oh. - Hey, Andre.

- I'll take him back to Miss Denise. - Hop Sing take him back.

Cute little doggy make Hop Sing wealthy man.

Get one thousand dollar reward from Mr. Hoss

soon as I take little doggy back to Missy Denise.

I didn't have the heart to tell him there wasn't any reward anymore.

You cancel an ad, you cancel the reward.

Hoss, you... you did cancel the reward, didn't you?

Did you cancel the reward?

You’ll just have to pay him the thousand dollars.

You’ll just have to pay him the thousand dollars. Didn't cancel...

Wait a minute, Pa. Little Joe lost that dog this time, not me.

So what if I lost the dog? I didn't put the ad in the paper. You did.

I took the dog back after I...

I never said anything about a thousand dollars.

Joe, I took the dog back...

Hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it, hold it!

You're both involved.

You're both stuck.

You'll both pay equally.

Is that understood? And I don't wanna hear another word about it.

I've just heard about everything, everything.

You don't really think Hop Sing'd hold us to that reward, do you?

- I mean, he's one of the family. - ♪ One thousand dollar

♪ One thousand dollar...

- He would. - He would.

Yes, and I don't blame him.

I tell you what I'd do if I were you two.

I'd go right into town and put another ad in

canceling that first stupid ad of yours,

just in case Miss Denise loses that dog again.

Then you'll be stuck for another thousand dollars.

He's right. Let's get in there. Come on.

That'd be two thousand dollars.

Dogs, Big Man and rewards.

You got something there that belongs to me, friend.

Oh, you make big mistake. Little doggy belong to Missy Denise.

Yeah, you're right there, but I'm the one that's taking him to her.

I let you do that, then you get big reward instead of Hop Sing.

Yeah. I know you're with that miserable Cartwright clan.

But you sure don't think like them. You got sense.

So just hand over that yapping mongrel and we'll part peaceful like.

You say I got sense and you right.

More sense than to let you get big reward.

Now, if you got sense, you let me by.

I can't say I ain't gonna enjoy this.

I finally found me a Cartwright that I can work over real good.

Hmm!

Did... Did you see that?

I sure did.

I tell you this, I ain't never gonna complain

about no burnt chicken no more.

Oh.

Oh.

Oh, baby, baby.

Oh, Andre. Don't you ever do that again.

Hop Sing think small hoosegow

is a good place to keep little doggy safe from danger.

Oh, how can I thank you? I must reward you.

You returned my precious love and you must not refuse.

Here. You must take it. Five dollar.

Hop Sing no can understand woman.

When money is belong to you, little doggy is only worth five dollar.

When money is belong to Mr. Hoss and Little Joe,

little doggy is worth one thousand dollar.

Confucius have nothing to say to describe woman.

Now I understand.

Giddyap. Hah!

Oh, Andre.

My baby.

Andre.

Oh, honey. Andre loves you.

- Look. - Yes, ma'am, he sure does.

You poor man.

- Want to hold him? - Yes, thank you.

Oui.

May we have the roast beef now, please?

May we please have the roast beef now?

For our guest.

And please serve from the left.

More bread, please.

More bread coming up.

- I heard him, I heard him. - More wine, please.

- More wine. - I heard. I heard.

That's no way to serve bread.

Hop Sing.

- Skol. - Skol.

This has been a color production

of the NBC television network.