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1
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I'm nervous.
2
00:00:06,600 --> 00:00:08,600
I'm going to take it
one step at a time.
3
00:00:08,640 --> 00:00:08,880
I'm going to take it
one step at a time.
4
00:00:08,920 --> 00:00:10,920
I'm absolutely petrified.
5
00:00:10,960 --> 00:00:11,200
I'm absolutely petrified.
6
00:00:11,240 --> 00:00:13,240
12 virgins are travelling to
a unique island retreat...
7
00:00:13,280 --> 00:00:14,960
12 virgins are travelling to
a unique island retreat...
8
00:00:16,520 --> 00:00:18,520
..that could change
their lives forever.
9
00:00:18,560 --> 00:00:19,360
..that could change
their lives forever.
10
00:00:19,400 --> 00:00:21,400
This is maybe the
strangest day of my life.
11
00:00:21,440 --> 00:00:23,440
Being a virgin at the age of 22
feels very lonely.
12
00:00:23,480 --> 00:00:25,440
Being a virgin at the age of 22
feels very lonely.
13
00:00:25,480 --> 00:00:27,480
I've just sort of given up all hope.
14
00:00:27,520 --> 00:00:27,680
I've just sort of given up all hope.
15
00:00:28,720 --> 00:00:30,720
In a world saturated with sex,
16
00:00:30,760 --> 00:00:31,240
In a world saturated with sex,
17
00:00:31,280 --> 00:00:33,280
more young adults than ever
are caught in an intimacy epidemic.
18
00:00:33,320 --> 00:00:35,320
more young adults than ever
are caught in an intimacy epidemic.
19
00:00:35,360 --> 00:00:35,640
more young adults than ever
are caught in an intimacy epidemic.
20
00:00:35,680 --> 00:00:37,280
The thought of having sex
with someone...
21
00:00:37,320 --> 00:00:38,320
Scares me.
22
00:00:38,360 --> 00:00:39,360
It gives me the ick.
23
00:00:39,400 --> 00:00:40,560
I don't feel confident.
24
00:00:40,600 --> 00:00:42,600
I'm missing out.
Terrified of the thought of it.
25
00:00:42,640 --> 00:00:42,880
I'm missing out.
Terrified of the thought of it.
26
00:00:42,920 --> 00:00:44,120
Nerve-racking. Gut-wrenching.
27
00:00:44,160 --> 00:00:45,760
Embarrassing.
28
00:00:45,800 --> 00:00:47,800
All I think about is what
I'm going to get wrong.
29
00:00:47,840 --> 00:00:48,600
All I think about is what
I'm going to get wrong.
30
00:00:48,640 --> 00:00:50,520
Can you point to the outer labia?
31
00:00:51,760 --> 00:00:52,720
Nope.
32
00:00:54,360 --> 00:00:56,360
Now...Oh, my God!
33
00:00:56,400 --> 00:00:57,040
Now...Oh, my God!
34
00:00:57,080 --> 00:00:59,080
..they're getting a crash course
in intimacy.
35
00:00:59,120 --> 00:01:00,120
..they're getting a crash course
in intimacy.
36
00:01:00,160 --> 00:01:02,160
Social media, porn, dating apps.
37
00:01:02,200 --> 00:01:03,080
Social media, porn, dating apps.
38
00:01:03,120 --> 00:01:05,120
There are so many negative messages
and we can help them blossom.
39
00:01:05,160 --> 00:01:06,480
There are so many negative messages
and we can help them blossom.
40
00:01:06,520 --> 00:01:08,520
Use it by stimulating the area.
41
00:01:08,560 --> 00:01:08,800
Use it by stimulating the area.
42
00:01:08,840 --> 00:01:10,840
Guided by a team of experts...
43
00:01:10,880 --> 00:01:11,080
Guided by a team of experts...
44
00:01:11,120 --> 00:01:13,120
You see yourself as... Repulsive.
45
00:01:13,160 --> 00:01:13,480
You see yourself as... Repulsive.
46
00:01:13,520 --> 00:01:15,520
..they'll confront
their insecurities...
47
00:01:15,560 --> 00:01:15,840
..they'll confront
their insecurities...
48
00:01:15,880 --> 00:01:17,880
I'm hiding how upset
I actually feel.
49
00:01:17,920 --> 00:01:18,400
I'm hiding how upset
I actually feel.
50
00:01:18,440 --> 00:01:20,200
..exploring intimacy...
51
00:01:21,840 --> 00:01:23,600
..in every form...
52
00:01:23,640 --> 00:01:24,920
Yes, yes.
53
00:01:24,960 --> 00:01:26,840
Good.
54
00:01:26,880 --> 00:01:27,880
..and maybe...
55
00:01:27,920 --> 00:01:29,840
Do you want to put a condom on?
56
00:01:29,880 --> 00:01:31,880
..have sex with
a trained therapist...
57
00:01:31,920 --> 00:01:32,240
..have sex with
a trained therapist...
58
00:01:32,280 --> 00:01:34,040
Desperate times call for
desperate measures.
59
00:01:34,080 --> 00:01:35,760
THEY CHEER
60
00:01:35,800 --> 00:01:37,160
..or even one another.
61
00:01:37,200 --> 00:01:38,360
Why are you nervous around me?
62
00:01:38,400 --> 00:01:39,720
I don't know.
63
00:01:39,760 --> 00:01:41,600
That's so good.
64
00:01:41,640 --> 00:01:43,640
I really do need to change my life.
65
00:01:43,680 --> 00:01:44,080
I really do need to change my life.
66
00:01:44,120 --> 00:01:45,400
The question is...
67
00:01:45,440 --> 00:01:47,080
Get a room, guys!
68
00:01:47,120 --> 00:01:49,120
..who will finally be ready...
69
00:01:49,160 --> 00:01:49,560
..who will finally be ready...
70
00:01:49,600 --> 00:01:51,200
Just, like, get a bit anxious.
71
00:01:51,240 --> 00:01:52,880
..to go all the way...
72
00:01:54,160 --> 00:01:55,160
Mm-hm.
73
00:01:55,200 --> 00:01:56,240
..on Virgin Island?
74
00:02:03,000 --> 00:02:04,800
{\an8}In the first phase of the course...
75
00:02:04,840 --> 00:02:06,840
{\an8}Shame really interrupts pleasure.
76
00:02:06,880 --> 00:02:08,640
{\an8}Shame really interrupts pleasure.
77
00:02:08,680 --> 00:02:10,680
..the group confronted their shame.
78
00:02:10,720 --> 00:02:10,960
..the group confronted their shame.
79
00:02:11,000 --> 00:02:13,000
Have I got a lipstick stain?
No, you haven't. Excellent.
80
00:02:13,040 --> 00:02:13,280
Have I got a lipstick stain?
No, you haven't. Excellent.
81
00:02:13,320 --> 00:02:15,280
Bertie made small steps forward...
82
00:02:15,320 --> 00:02:17,320
What do you think? Let's go!
83
00:02:17,360 --> 00:02:17,560
What do you think? Let's go!
84
00:02:17,600 --> 00:02:19,600
..but witnessing intimacy
85
00:02:19,640 --> 00:02:19,880
..but witnessing intimacy
86
00:02:19,920 --> 00:02:21,920
stirred up Joy's feelings
of religious shame...
87
00:02:21,960 --> 00:02:22,720
stirred up Joy's feelings
of religious shame...
88
00:02:22,760 --> 00:02:24,760
I literally thought that God
cursed me with vaginismus
89
00:02:24,800 --> 00:02:25,520
I literally thought that God
cursed me with vaginismus
90
00:02:25,560 --> 00:02:27,520
to stop me from having sex.
91
00:02:27,560 --> 00:02:29,560
..and Alex revealed the
extent of his anxiety.
92
00:02:29,600 --> 00:02:30,600
..and Alex revealed the
extent of his anxiety.
93
00:02:30,640 --> 00:02:32,640
Penny for your thoughts?
94
00:02:32,680 --> 00:02:33,120
Penny for your thoughts?
95
00:02:33,160 --> 00:02:35,160
The main overriding thing
is still that worry
96
00:02:35,200 --> 00:02:35,440
The main overriding thing
is still that worry
97
00:02:35,480 --> 00:02:37,160
of not getting an erection.
98
00:02:37,200 --> 00:02:38,480
The phase ended...
99
00:02:38,520 --> 00:02:40,520
For me, shame is feeling ugly.
100
00:02:40,560 --> 00:02:42,240
For me, shame is feeling ugly.
101
00:02:42,280 --> 00:02:43,320
Sorry.
102
00:02:43,360 --> 00:02:45,240
..with the group
letting their shame...
103
00:02:45,280 --> 00:02:47,280
ALL CHANTING:Let it go, let it go!
104
00:02:47,320 --> 00:02:47,760
ALL CHANTING:Let it go, let it go!
105
00:02:47,800 --> 00:02:49,600
..go up in flames.
106
00:02:49,640 --> 00:02:51,640
CHEERING
107
00:02:51,680 --> 00:02:51,880
CHEERING
108
00:02:51,920 --> 00:02:53,880
Now, things are set to escalate...
109
00:02:53,920 --> 00:02:55,920
Imagine that your cock is
going inside my vagina.
110
00:02:55,960 --> 00:02:56,920
Imagine that your cock is
going inside my vagina.
111
00:02:56,960 --> 00:02:58,920
..with the second phase
of the course...
112
00:02:58,960 --> 00:03:00,240
Good.
113
00:03:00,280 --> 00:03:01,600
..turn-ons.
114
00:03:01,640 --> 00:03:03,640
In society, a lot of people feel
ashamed to talk about sex.
115
00:03:03,680 --> 00:03:05,560
In society, a lot of people feel
ashamed to talk about sex.
116
00:03:05,600 --> 00:03:07,240
It can be very embarrassing.
117
00:03:07,280 --> 00:03:09,280
Take a moment to look at your vulva.
118
00:03:09,320 --> 00:03:09,560
Take a moment to look at your vulva.
119
00:03:09,600 --> 00:03:11,600
{\an8}But to have a really
fulfilling sex life,
120
00:03:11,640 --> 00:03:11,920
{\an8}But to have a really
fulfilling sex life,
121
00:03:11,960 --> 00:03:13,840
{\an8}you have to know what turns you on.
122
00:03:21,840 --> 00:03:23,640
Good morning. Morning.
123
00:03:23,680 --> 00:03:25,160
Morning!
124
00:03:25,200 --> 00:03:27,200
It's the morning of day three
on Virgin Island...
125
00:03:27,240 --> 00:03:28,480
It's the morning of day three
on Virgin Island...
126
00:03:28,520 --> 00:03:29,520
Oh!
127
00:03:29,560 --> 00:03:31,560
Here we go, then.
128
00:03:31,600 --> 00:03:31,880
Here we go, then.
129
00:03:31,920 --> 00:03:33,920
..and time for the group
to discover what's in store
130
00:03:33,960 --> 00:03:34,480
..and time for the group
to discover what's in store
131
00:03:34,520 --> 00:03:36,520
over the next two days.
132
00:03:36,560 --> 00:03:36,760
over the next two days.
133
00:03:36,800 --> 00:03:38,800
"The next phase is turn-ons."
134
00:03:38,840 --> 00:03:39,160
"The next phase is turn-ons."
135
00:03:39,200 --> 00:03:41,200
I think turn-ons might involve
a lot of dirty talk.
136
00:03:41,240 --> 00:03:42,520
I think turn-ons might involve
a lot of dirty talk.
137
00:03:42,560 --> 00:03:44,560
It is quite a step up from hugging
and stroking people's arms.
138
00:03:44,600 --> 00:03:45,680
It is quite a step up from hugging
and stroking people's arms.
139
00:03:45,720 --> 00:03:47,720
Talking about, like, what turns
you on is a private thing,
140
00:03:47,760 --> 00:03:49,040
Talking about, like, what turns
you on is a private thing,
141
00:03:49,080 --> 00:03:51,080
but I guess nothing is private
on this island.
142
00:03:51,120 --> 00:03:52,640
but I guess nothing is private
on this island.
143
00:03:52,680 --> 00:03:54,680
Morning! Good morning.
144
00:03:54,720 --> 00:03:56,720
I'm feeling nervous
and tense over this.
145
00:03:56,760 --> 00:03:58,760
I'm feeling nervous
and tense over this.
146
00:03:58,800 --> 00:03:59,960
I'm feeling nervous
and tense over this.
147
00:04:00,000 --> 00:04:02,000
It's going to be
a very big challenge.
148
00:04:02,040 --> 00:04:02,240
It's going to be
a very big challenge.
149
00:04:03,400 --> 00:04:04,680
Turn-ons, guys.
150
00:04:04,720 --> 00:04:06,720
Your aim is to find
everyone's turn-ons!
151
00:04:06,760 --> 00:04:07,000
Your aim is to find
everyone's turn-ons!
152
00:04:07,040 --> 00:04:08,920
LAUGHTER
153
00:04:08,960 --> 00:04:10,960
Thing is, I know all my turn-ons,
154
00:04:11,000 --> 00:04:11,400
Thing is, I know all my turn-ons,
155
00:04:11,440 --> 00:04:13,440
but talking about it
feels quite daunting.
156
00:04:13,480 --> 00:04:14,560
but talking about it
feels quite daunting.
157
00:04:14,600 --> 00:04:16,560
If one of the guys gets a boner,
like, they're going to be like,
158
00:04:16,600 --> 00:04:18,320
"We're so proud of you."
Very proud.
159
00:04:20,160 --> 00:04:21,600
I'm very nervous.
160
00:04:21,640 --> 00:04:23,640
It just all feels like something
I'm not allowed to think about.
161
00:04:23,680 --> 00:04:24,240
It just all feels like something
I'm not allowed to think about.
162
00:04:24,280 --> 00:04:25,640
Like, oh, my gosh.
163
00:04:25,680 --> 00:04:27,480
No, no, no, no, no.
164
00:04:31,800 --> 00:04:33,240
Are you ready to know your turn-ons?
165
00:04:33,280 --> 00:04:34,360
No.
166
00:04:34,400 --> 00:04:35,720
Do you know your turn-ons?
167
00:04:35,760 --> 00:04:37,760
Harry Styles.
LAUGHTER
168
00:04:37,800 --> 00:04:38,040
Harry Styles.
LAUGHTER
169
00:04:38,080 --> 00:04:40,080
The group may be sexual beginners...
170
00:04:40,120 --> 00:04:40,480
The group may be sexual beginners...
171
00:04:40,520 --> 00:04:42,520
Hi!
172
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:42,800
Hi!
173
00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:44,840
..but Celeste and Danielle want them
to imagine they're experts
174
00:04:44,880 --> 00:04:46,120
..but Celeste and Danielle want them
to imagine they're experts
175
00:04:46,160 --> 00:04:48,160
and embrace their turn-ons.
176
00:04:48,200 --> 00:04:48,360
and embrace their turn-ons.
177
00:04:51,720 --> 00:04:53,720
People get really confused.
They're like, "What turns me on?
178
00:04:53,760 --> 00:04:54,920
People get really confused.
They're like, "What turns me on?
179
00:04:54,960 --> 00:04:56,960
"Is it positions or do I need
to buy a new toy?"
180
00:04:57,000 --> 00:04:58,120
"Is it positions or do I need
to buy a new toy?"
181
00:04:58,160 --> 00:05:00,160
But what really turns us on is the
feeling that we get during sex.
182
00:05:00,200 --> 00:05:02,200
But what really turns us on is the
feeling that we get during sex.
183
00:05:02,240 --> 00:05:03,400
But what really turns us on is the
feeling that we get during sex.
184
00:05:03,440 --> 00:05:05,440
We call this our core desires.
185
00:05:05,480 --> 00:05:05,640
We call this our core desires.
186
00:05:06,760 --> 00:05:08,760
This is the cornerstone of
the whole course.
187
00:05:08,800 --> 00:05:09,360
This is the cornerstone of
the whole course.
188
00:05:09,400 --> 00:05:11,080
Everyone should know
their core desires.
189
00:05:11,120 --> 00:05:13,080
If you want to have
an amazing sex life,
190
00:05:13,120 --> 00:05:15,120
find out what you want to feel
during sex and tell your partners.
191
00:05:15,160 --> 00:05:16,680
find out what you want to feel
during sex and tell your partners.
192
00:05:16,720 --> 00:05:18,720
For me, in sex, it's all about
feeling very special.
193
00:05:18,760 --> 00:05:20,760
For me, in sex, it's all about
feeling very special.
194
00:05:20,800 --> 00:05:21,040
For me, in sex, it's all about
feeling very special.
195
00:05:21,080 --> 00:05:23,080
I want to feel powerful.
196
00:05:23,120 --> 00:05:23,600
I want to feel powerful.
197
00:05:23,640 --> 00:05:25,640
I want to feel like
they're lucky to have me.
198
00:05:25,680 --> 00:05:26,760
I want to feel like
they're lucky to have me.
199
00:05:26,800 --> 00:05:28,800
And for me, I really like to
feel like I'm the queen.
200
00:05:28,840 --> 00:05:30,840
And for me, I really like to
feel like I'm the queen.
201
00:05:30,880 --> 00:05:31,440
And for me, I really like to
feel like I'm the queen.
202
00:05:31,480 --> 00:05:33,480
People have many different feelings
that they want to have during sex,
203
00:05:33,520 --> 00:05:34,360
People have many different feelings
that they want to have during sex,
204
00:05:34,400 --> 00:05:35,920
and all of them are beautiful.
205
00:05:35,960 --> 00:05:37,520
We don't shame any of them.
206
00:05:38,920 --> 00:05:40,920
So you can just lie down, relax.
207
00:05:40,960 --> 00:05:42,040
So you can just lie down, relax.
208
00:05:43,200 --> 00:05:44,600
To get them in the mood,
209
00:05:44,640 --> 00:05:46,640
Danielle begins with a
visualisation exercise.
210
00:05:46,680 --> 00:05:47,880
Danielle begins with a
visualisation exercise.
211
00:05:49,520 --> 00:05:51,520
I want you to start thinking about
a fantasy that you might be having.
212
00:05:51,560 --> 00:05:53,560
I want you to start thinking about
a fantasy that you might be having.
213
00:05:53,600 --> 00:05:55,080
I want you to start thinking about
a fantasy that you might be having.
214
00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:57,120
It can be something that
you saw in a movie
215
00:05:57,160 --> 00:05:58,800
It can be something that
you saw in a movie
216
00:05:58,840 --> 00:06:00,840
or some erotics that you read,
217
00:06:00,880 --> 00:06:02,320
or some erotics that you read,
218
00:06:02,360 --> 00:06:04,360
and then start noticing -
219
00:06:04,400 --> 00:06:05,400
and then start noticing -
220
00:06:05,440 --> 00:06:07,440
what is the feeling that you want
to feel in that moment?
221
00:06:07,480 --> 00:06:09,480
what is the feeling that you want
to feel in that moment?
222
00:06:09,520 --> 00:06:09,720
what is the feeling that you want
to feel in that moment?
223
00:06:11,200 --> 00:06:13,200
You might want to feel
loved or precious.
224
00:06:13,240 --> 00:06:15,040
You might want to feel
loved or precious.
225
00:06:16,320 --> 00:06:18,320
Might want to feel
masterful, desired.
226
00:06:18,360 --> 00:06:20,360
Might want to feel
masterful, desired.
227
00:06:20,400 --> 00:06:20,600
Might want to feel
masterful, desired.
228
00:06:23,520 --> 00:06:25,520
Whenever you're ready, come back.
229
00:06:25,560 --> 00:06:26,720
Whenever you're ready, come back.
230
00:06:26,760 --> 00:06:28,280
Sit at the edge of your mat.
231
00:06:30,320 --> 00:06:32,280
With their core desires in mind...
232
00:06:32,320 --> 00:06:33,680
Thank you.
233
00:06:33,720 --> 00:06:35,720
..the experts want the group
to write them down on a stone
234
00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:36,480
..the experts want the group
to write them down on a stone
235
00:06:36,520 --> 00:06:38,160
and share with each other.
236
00:06:40,040 --> 00:06:41,640
Could just play noughts and crosses.
237
00:06:41,680 --> 00:06:43,480
LAUGHTER
238
00:06:55,600 --> 00:06:57,600
OK, so who feels like they are
ready to come up?
239
00:06:57,640 --> 00:06:58,040
OK, so who feels like they are
ready to come up?
240
00:07:01,560 --> 00:07:03,560
I'm going to go. Great. Wonderful.
241
00:07:03,600 --> 00:07:03,840
I'm going to go. Great. Wonderful.
242
00:07:03,880 --> 00:07:05,880
For Joy, her desires have
always been complicated.
243
00:07:05,920 --> 00:07:07,800
For Joy, her desires have
always been complicated.
244
00:07:07,840 --> 00:07:09,240
When I was in year seven and eight,
245
00:07:09,280 --> 00:07:11,280
I thought it wasn't OK to be gay.
246
00:07:11,320 --> 00:07:11,640
I thought it wasn't OK to be gay.
247
00:07:11,680 --> 00:07:13,400
Um...
248
00:07:13,440 --> 00:07:15,440
I spoke to a church pastor
249
00:07:15,480 --> 00:07:15,680
I spoke to a church pastor
250
00:07:15,720 --> 00:07:17,720
and he started going on a rant
251
00:07:17,760 --> 00:07:19,760
about gay people being really sexual
and slutty and promiscuous.
252
00:07:19,800 --> 00:07:21,680
about gay people being really sexual
and slutty and promiscuous.
253
00:07:21,720 --> 00:07:23,720
And I realised myself
that I was bisexual.
254
00:07:23,760 --> 00:07:24,360
And I realised myself
that I was bisexual.
255
00:07:26,520 --> 00:07:28,520
But sex with a woman is like
an undiscovered landscape.
256
00:07:28,560 --> 00:07:30,560
But sex with a woman is like
an undiscovered landscape.
257
00:07:30,600 --> 00:07:31,200
But sex with a woman is like
an undiscovered landscape.
258
00:07:31,240 --> 00:07:33,240
I do feel a bit guilty for
wanting to explore it.
259
00:07:33,280 --> 00:07:33,480
I do feel a bit guilty for
wanting to explore it.
260
00:07:36,080 --> 00:07:38,080
So I put cherished.
261
00:07:38,120 --> 00:07:38,720
So I put cherished.
262
00:07:38,760 --> 00:07:40,080
Um...
263
00:07:40,120 --> 00:07:42,120
Revered, lost in the moment, free
264
00:07:42,160 --> 00:07:44,080
Revered, lost in the moment, free
265
00:07:44,120 --> 00:07:46,120
and ultimately ravished.
266
00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:47,040
and ultimately ravished.
267
00:07:47,080 --> 00:07:49,080
Yay! That's my girl.
268
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:49,320
Yay! That's my girl.
269
00:07:49,360 --> 00:07:51,360
APPLAUSE
270
00:07:51,400 --> 00:07:51,760
APPLAUSE
271
00:07:51,800 --> 00:07:53,040
As others step up...
272
00:07:53,080 --> 00:07:54,280
I'll do it.
273
00:07:54,320 --> 00:07:55,760
..some themes emerge.
274
00:07:55,800 --> 00:07:57,800
For me, I think the most important
thing is to feel wanted.
275
00:07:57,840 --> 00:07:58,760
For me, I think the most important
thing is to feel wanted.
276
00:07:58,800 --> 00:08:00,040
Feeling wanted...
277
00:08:00,080 --> 00:08:01,360
I put wanted.
278
00:08:01,400 --> 00:08:02,920
I've mainly put wanted.
279
00:08:02,960 --> 00:08:04,960
..and appreciated are
common desires...
280
00:08:05,000 --> 00:08:05,360
..and appreciated are
common desires...
281
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:06,880
I want to feel loved.
282
00:08:06,920 --> 00:08:08,400
Loved. Everyone wants to feel loved.
283
00:08:08,440 --> 00:08:10,040
I've only got pampered on mine.
284
00:08:10,080 --> 00:08:11,200
Special.
285
00:08:11,240 --> 00:08:13,240
Praised, and then it would feel
nice to have a safe space.
286
00:08:13,280 --> 00:08:14,600
Praised, and then it would feel
nice to have a safe space.
287
00:08:14,640 --> 00:08:16,640
..while some want to be dominated.
288
00:08:16,680 --> 00:08:16,920
..while some want to be dominated.
289
00:08:16,960 --> 00:08:18,920
I want to feel on edge and teased.
290
00:08:18,960 --> 00:08:20,400
Dominated.
291
00:08:20,440 --> 00:08:22,440
I feel like a little bit of a perv
telling you this, but, yeah.
292
00:08:22,480 --> 00:08:23,040
I feel like a little bit of a perv
telling you this, but, yeah.
293
00:08:23,080 --> 00:08:24,840
Oh, we love pervs. We love pervs.
294
00:08:24,880 --> 00:08:26,240
LAUGHTER
295
00:08:28,280 --> 00:08:30,280
So far, only 24-year-old Bertie
hasn't stepped up.
296
00:08:30,320 --> 00:08:32,040
So far, only 24-year-old Bertie
hasn't stepped up.
297
00:08:34,440 --> 00:08:36,440
I do a lot of volunteering work
in charity fundraising events.
298
00:08:36,480 --> 00:08:38,480
I do a lot of volunteering work
in charity fundraising events.
299
00:08:38,520 --> 00:08:39,520
I do a lot of volunteering work
in charity fundraising events.
300
00:08:39,560 --> 00:08:41,560
I'm the one to try and get
a lot of rich people
301
00:08:41,600 --> 00:08:42,960
I'm the one to try and get
a lot of rich people
302
00:08:43,000 --> 00:08:44,560
to give money for charity.
303
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,360
You'll be disappointed in it,
but, er...
304
00:08:46,400 --> 00:08:48,400
But when it comes to discussing,
305
00:08:48,440 --> 00:08:49,160
But when it comes to discussing,
306
00:08:49,200 --> 00:08:50,880
you know, sexual things,
307
00:08:50,920 --> 00:08:52,920
I don't see myself
as a confident player.
308
00:08:52,960 --> 00:08:54,440
I don't see myself
as a confident player.
309
00:08:54,480 --> 00:08:56,480
I think turn-ons,
310
00:08:56,520 --> 00:08:58,520
I think turn-ons,
311
00:08:58,560 --> 00:09:00,560
especially from the
more sexual aspect,
312
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:01,280
especially from the
more sexual aspect,
313
00:09:01,320 --> 00:09:03,320
should not be shared
in front of everybody.
314
00:09:03,360 --> 00:09:04,000
should not be shared
in front of everybody.
315
00:09:04,040 --> 00:09:06,040
It should be kept as a secret
between you and your partner,
316
00:09:06,080 --> 00:09:07,600
It should be kept as a secret
between you and your partner,
317
00:09:07,640 --> 00:09:09,680
which is why I wrote,
318
00:09:09,720 --> 00:09:11,720
"I have turn-ons, but I'm not
sharing them in front of everyone.
319
00:09:11,760 --> 00:09:13,240
"I have turn-ons, but I'm not
sharing them in front of everyone.
320
00:09:13,280 --> 00:09:15,280
"It should only be a secret
between you and your partner."
321
00:09:15,320 --> 00:09:15,880
"It should only be a secret
between you and your partner."
322
00:09:15,920 --> 00:09:17,480
That's about it, really.
323
00:09:17,520 --> 00:09:19,520
APPLAUSE
324
00:09:19,560 --> 00:09:21,560
APPLAUSE
325
00:09:21,600 --> 00:09:21,920
APPLAUSE
326
00:09:31,240 --> 00:09:32,520
How are we all feeling?
327
00:09:32,560 --> 00:09:34,160
I really liked it. Yeah.
328
00:09:34,200 --> 00:09:36,200
I was just like, "Oh, wow,
this feels a bit different."
329
00:09:36,240 --> 00:09:37,520
I was just like, "Oh, wow,
this feels a bit different."
330
00:09:37,560 --> 00:09:39,560
Felt something in my nipples
as well, you know what I mean?
331
00:09:39,600 --> 00:09:39,920
Felt something in my nipples
as well, you know what I mean?
332
00:09:39,960 --> 00:09:41,960
Oh, yeah?
Yeah. Like, it felt a bit...
333
00:09:42,000 --> 00:09:42,200
Oh, yeah?
Yeah. Like, it felt a bit...
334
00:09:44,600 --> 00:09:46,600
The turn-ons exercise
may have worked for some...
335
00:09:46,640 --> 00:09:47,280
The turn-ons exercise
may have worked for some...
336
00:09:47,320 --> 00:09:49,320
When I go home, if I'm ever
in a relationship with someone,
337
00:09:49,360 --> 00:09:49,640
When I go home, if I'm ever
in a relationship with someone,
338
00:09:49,680 --> 00:09:51,680
I'm just going to put it
by their bedside table.
339
00:09:51,720 --> 00:09:51,960
I'm just going to put it
by their bedside table.
340
00:09:52,000 --> 00:09:53,040
Turn-ons!
341
00:09:56,320 --> 00:09:58,320
..but Bertie is just not feeling it.
342
00:09:58,360 --> 00:09:58,760
..but Bertie is just not feeling it.
343
00:09:58,800 --> 00:10:00,800
I was the only person
in the group to not do it.
344
00:10:00,840 --> 00:10:01,240
I was the only person
in the group to not do it.
345
00:10:01,280 --> 00:10:03,280
I didn't want to, like, say things
in front of everybody, you know?
346
00:10:03,320 --> 00:10:04,440
I didn't want to, like, say things
in front of everybody, you know?
347
00:10:04,480 --> 00:10:06,480
I do kind of feel like
I've been, like,
348
00:10:06,520 --> 00:10:07,120
I do kind of feel like
I've been, like,
349
00:10:07,160 --> 00:10:09,040
the odd one out in the group now.
Mm-hm.
350
00:10:09,080 --> 00:10:11,080
I feel like I've just taken
a bit of a setback after that.
351
00:10:11,120 --> 00:10:11,320
I feel like I've just taken
a bit of a setback after that.
352
00:10:12,600 --> 00:10:14,600
It certainly wasn't the most
enjoyable workshop, put it that way.
353
00:10:14,640 --> 00:10:15,960
It certainly wasn't the most
enjoyable workshop, put it that way.
354
00:10:16,000 --> 00:10:18,000
I felt a bit of uncomfortableness,
355
00:10:18,040 --> 00:10:19,440
I felt a bit of uncomfortableness,
356
00:10:19,480 --> 00:10:21,480
like, everywhere, really.
357
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:22,560
like, everywhere, really.
358
00:10:25,280 --> 00:10:27,280
To help the group
discover their turn-ons...
359
00:10:27,320 --> 00:10:27,720
To help the group
discover their turn-ons...
360
00:10:27,760 --> 00:10:29,760
Who's got the one-to-ones
today, mate?
361
00:10:29,800 --> 00:10:30,040
Who's got the one-to-ones
today, mate?
362
00:10:30,080 --> 00:10:32,040
..they'll all have one-on-ones...
363
00:10:32,080 --> 00:10:33,120
You've got Ilil.
364
00:10:33,160 --> 00:10:35,160
Ilil? OK. Which one's Ilil?
365
00:10:35,200 --> 00:10:35,400
Ilil? OK. Which one's Ilil?
366
00:10:35,440 --> 00:10:37,080
She's a sexological body worker.
367
00:10:37,120 --> 00:10:38,360
Island vibes.
368
00:10:38,400 --> 00:10:40,400
Ah, thank you. Now, I know.
369
00:10:40,440 --> 00:10:40,640
Ah, thank you. Now, I know.
370
00:10:40,680 --> 00:10:42,320
..starting with Alex,
371
00:10:42,360 --> 00:10:44,360
who has struggled to get turned on
under the pressure of intimacy.
372
00:10:44,400 --> 00:10:45,640
who has struggled to get turned on
under the pressure of intimacy.
373
00:10:46,960 --> 00:10:48,960
Sex has been a sense of
anxiety for me.
374
00:10:49,000 --> 00:10:50,240
Sex has been a sense of
anxiety for me.
375
00:10:50,280 --> 00:10:52,280
Growing up, my dad was quite
emotionally repressed himself.
376
00:10:52,320 --> 00:10:53,600
Growing up, my dad was quite
emotionally repressed himself.
377
00:10:53,640 --> 00:10:55,640
We had sex education
in school at year five,
378
00:10:55,680 --> 00:10:56,200
We had sex education
in school at year five,
379
00:10:56,240 --> 00:10:58,240
and I talked to my dad
about it and he said,
380
00:10:58,280 --> 00:10:58,880
and I talked to my dad
about it and he said,
381
00:10:58,920 --> 00:11:00,480
"Oh, that's rude.
Don't talk about that."
382
00:11:01,880 --> 00:11:03,880
I then became so embarrassed
to talk or think about sex.
383
00:11:03,920 --> 00:11:05,920
I then became so embarrassed
to talk or think about sex.
384
00:11:05,960 --> 00:11:06,240
I then became so embarrassed
to talk or think about sex.
385
00:11:06,280 --> 00:11:08,280
Whenever sex or relationships
or anything came on TV,
386
00:11:08,320 --> 00:11:09,960
Whenever sex or relationships
or anything came on TV,
387
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:12,000
I used to leave the room.
388
00:11:12,040 --> 00:11:12,760
I used to leave the room.
389
00:11:14,080 --> 00:11:16,080
It's estimated that half
of modern men
390
00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:16,480
It's estimated that half
of modern men
391
00:11:16,520 --> 00:11:18,520
have experienced performance anxiety.
392
00:11:18,560 --> 00:11:19,680
have experienced performance anxiety.
393
00:11:19,720 --> 00:11:21,720
To help Alex, sexological bodyworker
Ilil plans to get physical.
394
00:11:21,760 --> 00:11:23,760
To help Alex, sexological bodyworker
Ilil plans to get physical.
395
00:11:23,800 --> 00:11:24,800
To help Alex, sexological bodyworker
Ilil plans to get physical.
396
00:11:24,840 --> 00:11:26,840
I want to work with him
on receiving touch for me
397
00:11:26,880 --> 00:11:28,080
I want to work with him
on receiving touch for me
398
00:11:28,120 --> 00:11:30,120
and recognising when that
performance anxiety kicks in,
399
00:11:30,160 --> 00:11:31,600
and recognising when that
performance anxiety kicks in,
400
00:11:31,640 --> 00:11:33,640
and letting me know what he needs
in order to bring arousal up.
401
00:11:33,680 --> 00:11:35,480
and letting me know what he needs
in order to bring arousal up.
402
00:11:35,520 --> 00:11:37,520
So hopefully the erections will come
when he has a lot of pleasure.
403
00:11:37,560 --> 00:11:39,560
So hopefully the erections will come
when he has a lot of pleasure.
404
00:11:39,600 --> 00:11:40,120
So hopefully the erections will come
when he has a lot of pleasure.
405
00:11:41,560 --> 00:11:42,520
Hello!
406
00:11:44,880 --> 00:11:46,880
So the idea of today
is for us to do
407
00:11:46,920 --> 00:11:47,840
So the idea of today
is for us to do
408
00:11:47,880 --> 00:11:49,880
full-body pleasure mapping. Mm-hm.
409
00:11:49,920 --> 00:11:50,320
full-body pleasure mapping. Mm-hm.
410
00:11:50,360 --> 00:11:52,360
You're gonna be guiding
the whole thing.
411
00:11:52,400 --> 00:11:52,680
You're gonna be guiding
the whole thing.
412
00:11:52,720 --> 00:11:54,720
Whenever you feel yourself starting
to worry about performance,
413
00:11:54,760 --> 00:11:56,760
Whenever you feel yourself starting
to worry about performance,
414
00:11:56,800 --> 00:11:57,560
Whenever you feel yourself starting
to worry about performance,
415
00:11:57,600 --> 00:11:59,600
you can just say, like,
"Can we slow down?"
416
00:11:59,640 --> 00:12:00,000
you can just say, like,
"Can we slow down?"
417
00:12:02,120 --> 00:12:03,520
So take your clothes off.
418
00:12:05,200 --> 00:12:07,200
I think I'd like to keep
my boxers on.
419
00:12:07,240 --> 00:12:07,480
I think I'd like to keep
my boxers on.
420
00:12:07,520 --> 00:12:08,920
Yeah. OK.
421
00:12:08,960 --> 00:12:10,960
Pleasure mapping is an exercise
422
00:12:11,000 --> 00:12:11,240
Pleasure mapping is an exercise
423
00:12:11,280 --> 00:12:13,280
where Ilil touches Alex
all over his body...
424
00:12:13,320 --> 00:12:14,080
where Ilil touches Alex
all over his body...
425
00:12:14,120 --> 00:12:16,120
So we can start laying down.
426
00:12:16,160 --> 00:12:16,680
So we can start laying down.
427
00:12:16,720 --> 00:12:18,720
..including his genitals,
428
00:12:18,760 --> 00:12:20,760
so Alex can lie back
and concentrate on pleasure.
429
00:12:20,800 --> 00:12:22,400
so Alex can lie back
and concentrate on pleasure.
430
00:12:22,440 --> 00:12:23,840
Is this the touch that...
431
00:12:23,880 --> 00:12:25,560
That feels nice, yeah. ..you want?
432
00:12:28,040 --> 00:12:30,040
I've had three people that
I would describe as a girlfriend...
433
00:12:30,080 --> 00:12:32,080
I've had three people that
I would describe as a girlfriend...
434
00:12:32,120 --> 00:12:32,320
I've had three people that
I would describe as a girlfriend...
435
00:12:33,760 --> 00:12:35,760
..but I never had sex with anyone.
436
00:12:35,800 --> 00:12:36,760
..but I never had sex with anyone.
437
00:12:36,800 --> 00:12:38,800
The first time I tried,
I had a panic attack.
438
00:12:38,840 --> 00:12:39,120
The first time I tried,
I had a panic attack.
439
00:12:39,160 --> 00:12:40,880
I was so nervous,
I couldn't get an erection.
440
00:12:40,920 --> 00:12:42,840
And, um...
441
00:12:42,880 --> 00:12:44,880
..I then convinced myself that
442
00:12:44,920 --> 00:12:45,160
..I then convinced myself that
443
00:12:45,200 --> 00:12:47,200
sex is something, I guess,
scary or nerve-racking.
444
00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:48,920
sex is something, I guess,
scary or nerve-racking.
445
00:12:48,960 --> 00:12:50,720
It's constantly playing on my mind.
446
00:12:52,680 --> 00:12:54,680
Is this the right speed?
Yeah, that's great.
447
00:12:54,720 --> 00:12:54,920
Is this the right speed?
Yeah, that's great.
448
00:12:57,960 --> 00:12:59,400
Very erotic.
449
00:12:59,440 --> 00:13:01,440
So touching close to
your underwear line,
450
00:13:01,480 --> 00:13:01,880
So touching close to
your underwear line,
451
00:13:01,920 --> 00:13:03,600
it's almost, like, teasing you.
452
00:13:03,640 --> 00:13:05,040
Yeah. All right.
453
00:13:07,560 --> 00:13:09,040
What are you noticing?
454
00:13:09,080 --> 00:13:11,080
Getting more turned on. Mm-hm.
455
00:13:11,120 --> 00:13:11,320
Getting more turned on. Mm-hm.
456
00:13:11,360 --> 00:13:13,000
Really getting, like, excited.
457
00:13:13,040 --> 00:13:15,040
Mm-hm.
458
00:13:15,080 --> 00:13:15,320
Mm-hm.
459
00:13:15,360 --> 00:13:17,360
It felt really nice when you were
brushing past my genitals.
460
00:13:17,400 --> 00:13:18,000
It felt really nice when you were
brushing past my genitals.
461
00:13:18,040 --> 00:13:20,040
Would you like me to do that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
462
00:13:20,080 --> 00:13:20,280
Would you like me to do that?
Yeah, yeah, yeah.
463
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,200
And I love when you move like that.
464
00:13:25,240 --> 00:13:27,240
It kind of really lets me know
that you're enjoying yourself.
465
00:13:27,280 --> 00:13:28,280
It kind of really lets me know
that you're enjoying yourself.
466
00:13:39,640 --> 00:13:41,000
All right.
467
00:13:42,560 --> 00:13:43,880
Amazing.
468
00:13:43,920 --> 00:13:45,800
Amazing, amazing, amazing.
469
00:13:47,200 --> 00:13:49,200
I'm gonna take my hand
off very slowly.
470
00:13:49,240 --> 00:13:49,440
I'm gonna take my hand
off very slowly.
471
00:13:52,080 --> 00:13:54,080
So, did you feel me fully aroused?
472
00:13:54,120 --> 00:13:54,560
So, did you feel me fully aroused?
473
00:13:54,600 --> 00:13:55,880
Yeah.
474
00:13:55,920 --> 00:13:57,920
Could you feel you fully aroused?
Yeah, yeah.
475
00:13:57,960 --> 00:13:58,800
Could you feel you fully aroused?
Yeah, yeah.
476
00:13:58,840 --> 00:13:59,920
Amazing.
477
00:14:02,080 --> 00:14:04,080
Have you ever felt aroused
like that with someone?
478
00:14:04,120 --> 00:14:04,720
Have you ever felt aroused
like that with someone?
479
00:14:04,760 --> 00:14:06,760
Not like that.
Not to the point where I'm, like,
480
00:14:06,800 --> 00:14:07,040
Not like that.
Not to the point where I'm, like,
481
00:14:07,080 --> 00:14:09,080
moving my hips and feeling tingly.
482
00:14:09,120 --> 00:14:09,600
moving my hips and feeling tingly.
483
00:14:09,640 --> 00:14:11,640
You were very, very erect. Yeah.
484
00:14:11,680 --> 00:14:12,400
You were very, very erect. Yeah.
485
00:14:12,440 --> 00:14:13,920
You did so good. Thank you so much.
486
00:14:15,480 --> 00:14:16,960
Bye-bye.
487
00:14:17,000 --> 00:14:19,000
I don't think I've ever felt that
sort of level of eroticism before.
488
00:14:19,040 --> 00:14:20,240
I don't think I've ever felt that
sort of level of eroticism before.
489
00:14:20,280 --> 00:14:22,080
She just has such
a calming presence.
490
00:14:22,120 --> 00:14:23,560
So, yeah, feeling really good
491
00:14:23,600 --> 00:14:25,600
and sort of inspires
confidence going forward.
492
00:14:25,640 --> 00:14:25,880
and sort of inspires
confidence going forward.
493
00:14:30,520 --> 00:14:32,520
Hey, guys.
How did your one-on-one go?
494
00:14:32,560 --> 00:14:33,040
Hey, guys.
How did your one-on-one go?
495
00:14:33,080 --> 00:14:35,080
Good. It went into genital touching
496
00:14:35,120 --> 00:14:37,120
and, yeah, that felt really good.
497
00:14:37,160 --> 00:14:37,440
and, yeah, that felt really good.
498
00:14:37,480 --> 00:14:38,560
I bet!
499
00:14:38,600 --> 00:14:40,600
LAUGHTER
500
00:14:40,640 --> 00:14:41,560
LAUGHTER
501
00:14:49,560 --> 00:14:51,560
{\an8}It was really windy last night.
Yeah.
502
00:14:51,600 --> 00:14:53,600
Like, for a while, I think, like,
my tent was going to blow away.
503
00:14:53,640 --> 00:14:54,440
Like, for a while, I think, like,
my tent was going to blow away.
504
00:14:54,480 --> 00:14:56,120
Oh, my God. Do a Dorothy!
505
00:14:56,160 --> 00:14:57,600
Go to the yellow brick road.
506
00:14:57,640 --> 00:14:59,640
Celeste and Danielle have turned
into a tin man and a scarecrow.
507
00:14:59,680 --> 00:15:00,160
Celeste and Danielle have turned
into a tin man and a scarecrow.
508
00:15:02,080 --> 00:15:04,080
I'll probably be the lion
because I'm the cowardly one.
509
00:15:04,120 --> 00:15:05,000
I'll probably be the lion
because I'm the cowardly one.
510
00:15:07,280 --> 00:15:09,280
It's the afternoon on Virgin Island.
511
00:15:09,320 --> 00:15:10,200
It's the afternoon on Virgin Island.
512
00:15:10,240 --> 00:15:11,520
How does that feel?
513
00:15:11,560 --> 00:15:13,440
Yeah, it feels good.
514
00:15:13,480 --> 00:15:15,480
As the one-on-one sessions
continue...
515
00:15:15,520 --> 00:15:16,040
As the one-on-one sessions
continue...
516
00:15:16,080 --> 00:15:17,200
It's good.
517
00:15:17,240 --> 00:15:19,160
You seem more open to me.
518
00:15:19,200 --> 00:15:20,640
It's just baby steps.
519
00:15:20,680 --> 00:15:22,680
..the turn-on phase of the course
is gathering pace...
520
00:15:22,720 --> 00:15:23,960
..the turn-on phase of the course
is gathering pace...
521
00:15:24,000 --> 00:15:26,000
May I direct you
in touching my breasts?
522
00:15:26,040 --> 00:15:26,920
May I direct you
in touching my breasts?
523
00:15:26,960 --> 00:15:28,960
Yes. Yes.
524
00:15:29,000 --> 00:15:29,200
Yes. Yes.
525
00:15:29,240 --> 00:15:31,240
And a little more pressure. OK.
526
00:15:31,280 --> 00:15:31,440
And a little more pressure. OK.
527
00:15:34,320 --> 00:15:36,320
..and the group continues
to open up to each other.
528
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:37,280
..and the group continues
to open up to each other.
529
00:15:37,320 --> 00:15:39,320
When I was at school,
all the boys, like, would walk past
530
00:15:39,360 --> 00:15:40,720
When I was at school,
all the boys, like, would walk past
531
00:15:40,760 --> 00:15:42,560
and be like,
"Oh, you're all lesbians
532
00:15:42,600 --> 00:15:44,600
"because you go to an
all-girls school." Yeah.
533
00:15:44,640 --> 00:15:44,920
"because you go to an
all-girls school." Yeah.
534
00:15:44,960 --> 00:15:46,960
When I was, like, 12, I remember
thinking, "Oh, my gosh.
535
00:15:47,000 --> 00:15:48,000
When I was, like, 12, I remember
thinking, "Oh, my gosh.
536
00:15:48,040 --> 00:15:50,040
"Why has God given me
so many gay friends?
537
00:15:50,080 --> 00:15:50,320
"Why has God given me
so many gay friends?
538
00:15:50,360 --> 00:15:51,800
"I now have to convert all of them!"
539
00:15:51,840 --> 00:15:53,840
Took me a couple of years to realise
that I was, in fact, one of them.
540
00:15:53,880 --> 00:15:54,920
Took me a couple of years to realise
that I was, in fact, one of them.
541
00:15:58,360 --> 00:16:00,360
Years of sexual anxiety have taken
a physical toll on Joy.
542
00:16:00,400 --> 00:16:02,320
Years of sexual anxiety have taken
a physical toll on Joy.
543
00:16:02,360 --> 00:16:03,680
I have vaginismus,
544
00:16:03,720 --> 00:16:05,720
this physical and
psychological problem.
545
00:16:05,760 --> 00:16:06,200
this physical and
psychological problem.
546
00:16:06,240 --> 00:16:07,800
It causes pain.
547
00:16:07,840 --> 00:16:09,840
If I can't insert a finger
into my vagina,
548
00:16:09,880 --> 00:16:10,840
If I can't insert a finger
into my vagina,
549
00:16:10,880 --> 00:16:12,880
you know, how can I
physically have sex?
550
00:16:12,920 --> 00:16:13,200
you know, how can I
physically have sex?
551
00:16:13,240 --> 00:16:14,840
With guidance from Ilil,
552
00:16:14,880 --> 00:16:16,880
she'll learn how to relax
her body around touch.
553
00:16:16,920 --> 00:16:17,880
she'll learn how to relax
her body around touch.
554
00:16:17,920 --> 00:16:19,920
We can actually practise
555
00:16:19,960 --> 00:16:20,360
We can actually practise
556
00:16:20,400 --> 00:16:22,400
towards penetration
in a very slow process,
557
00:16:22,440 --> 00:16:24,320
towards penetration
in a very slow process,
558
00:16:24,360 --> 00:16:26,360
creating an alignment between
what the head wants to do
559
00:16:26,400 --> 00:16:27,760
creating an alignment between
what the head wants to do
560
00:16:27,800 --> 00:16:29,800
and what the body actually
feels comfortable with.
561
00:16:29,840 --> 00:16:30,360
and what the body actually
feels comfortable with.
562
00:16:32,000 --> 00:16:33,200
Hello, beautiful.
563
00:16:36,680 --> 00:16:38,680
So our intention for today is
if you feel comfortable,
564
00:16:38,720 --> 00:16:39,640
So our intention for today is
if you feel comfortable,
565
00:16:39,680 --> 00:16:41,680
we can explore the opening
of your vagina.
566
00:16:41,720 --> 00:16:41,960
we can explore the opening
of your vagina.
567
00:16:43,240 --> 00:16:45,240
Sometimes that's been hard
because it all, like, closes up.
568
00:16:45,280 --> 00:16:46,680
Sometimes that's been hard
because it all, like, closes up.
569
00:16:46,720 --> 00:16:48,560
Maybe we can see it today.
570
00:16:52,080 --> 00:16:54,080
I want you to just start by maybe
putting your hands on your vulva.
571
00:16:54,120 --> 00:16:55,440
I want you to just start by maybe
putting your hands on your vulva.
572
00:16:58,240 --> 00:17:00,240
Would you like to have a look
where you're touching? Yeah.
573
00:17:00,280 --> 00:17:00,880
Would you like to have a look
where you're touching? Yeah.
574
00:17:00,920 --> 00:17:02,920
Ilil encourages Joy to
explore her body...
575
00:17:02,960 --> 00:17:04,080
Ilil encourages Joy to
explore her body...
576
00:17:04,120 --> 00:17:06,120
Oh, my gosh, this is so weird.
Can you see?
577
00:17:06,160 --> 00:17:06,440
Oh, my gosh, this is so weird.
Can you see?
578
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,480
..and in doing so, change the way
she feels about it.
579
00:17:08,520 --> 00:17:09,760
..and in doing so, change the way
she feels about it.
580
00:17:09,800 --> 00:17:11,800
Take a moment to look at your vulva
and connect to her.
581
00:17:11,840 --> 00:17:13,840
Take a moment to look at your vulva
and connect to her.
582
00:17:13,880 --> 00:17:14,080
Take a moment to look at your vulva
and connect to her.
583
00:17:15,520 --> 00:17:16,760
She's beautiful.
584
00:17:16,800 --> 00:17:18,800
It's weird because
I feel like she looks ugly.
585
00:17:18,840 --> 00:17:19,600
It's weird because
I feel like she looks ugly.
586
00:17:19,640 --> 00:17:20,960
When I was 12,
587
00:17:21,000 --> 00:17:23,000
I had this realisation that
I had been masturbating.
588
00:17:23,040 --> 00:17:24,880
I had this realisation that
I had been masturbating.
589
00:17:24,920 --> 00:17:26,520
I went to Christian camp
590
00:17:26,560 --> 00:17:28,560
and there was this call to come
to the front for prayer,
591
00:17:28,600 --> 00:17:30,120
and there was this call to come
to the front for prayer,
592
00:17:30,160 --> 00:17:31,480
for sexual sin.
593
00:17:31,520 --> 00:17:33,160
I felt convicted.
594
00:17:33,200 --> 00:17:34,680
Like, "Oh, my gosh,
they're speaking about me.
595
00:17:34,720 --> 00:17:36,080
"I've sinned."
596
00:17:36,120 --> 00:17:38,120
And I told my youth pastor
597
00:17:38,160 --> 00:17:38,440
And I told my youth pastor
598
00:17:38,480 --> 00:17:40,480
and then she staged an intervention.
599
00:17:40,520 --> 00:17:42,000
and then she staged an intervention.
600
00:17:42,040 --> 00:17:43,440
Yeah, it's stuck with me.
601
00:17:43,480 --> 00:17:45,480
It's been hard to get that
out of my head.
602
00:17:45,520 --> 00:17:46,480
It's been hard to get that
out of my head.
603
00:17:46,520 --> 00:17:48,520
And now I want to be free to explore
a sexual side to myself.
604
00:17:48,560 --> 00:17:50,320
And now I want to be free to explore
a sexual side to myself.
605
00:17:50,360 --> 00:17:52,360
I want to enjoy my life
and accept myself.
606
00:17:52,400 --> 00:17:53,600
I want to enjoy my life
and accept myself.
607
00:17:55,360 --> 00:17:57,360
So what part are you curious about?
608
00:17:57,400 --> 00:17:58,120
So what part are you curious about?
609
00:17:58,160 --> 00:18:00,160
I think I want to just touch
the outer labia.
610
00:18:00,200 --> 00:18:01,600
I think I want to just touch
the outer labia.
611
00:18:01,640 --> 00:18:02,640
Awesome.
612
00:18:02,680 --> 00:18:04,680
You can do like that.
613
00:18:04,720 --> 00:18:05,000
You can do like that.
614
00:18:05,040 --> 00:18:07,040
You can, like, bring
a little bit of vibration. OK.
615
00:18:07,080 --> 00:18:08,480
You can, like, bring
a little bit of vibration. OK.
616
00:18:09,880 --> 00:18:11,040
That's quite nice.
617
00:18:11,080 --> 00:18:13,080
A bit arousing? Mm-hm. Yeah. Yeah,
618
00:18:13,120 --> 00:18:13,360
A bit arousing? Mm-hm. Yeah. Yeah,
619
00:18:13,400 --> 00:18:15,120
Do you want to try it with oil?
Yeah.
620
00:18:17,960 --> 00:18:19,960
Put it all over your vulva. Mm-hm.
621
00:18:20,000 --> 00:18:20,360
Put it all over your vulva. Mm-hm.
622
00:18:23,280 --> 00:18:25,280
It does feel totally different.
Yeah.
623
00:18:25,320 --> 00:18:25,880
It does feel totally different.
Yeah.
624
00:18:25,920 --> 00:18:27,440
Can you see your opening? Yeah.
625
00:18:27,480 --> 00:18:29,480
You can see a tiny dot there? Yeah.
626
00:18:29,520 --> 00:18:29,720
You can see a tiny dot there? Yeah.
627
00:18:29,760 --> 00:18:31,400
So that's your clit.
628
00:18:31,440 --> 00:18:32,840
Oh, that's so interesting.
629
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:34,760
The clit is like a miniature penis.
630
00:18:34,800 --> 00:18:36,800
You will feel there's,
like, a shaft.
631
00:18:36,840 --> 00:18:37,360
You will feel there's,
like, a shaft.
632
00:18:37,400 --> 00:18:39,400
See if you can feel the shaft. OK.
633
00:18:39,440 --> 00:18:39,600
See if you can feel the shaft. OK.
634
00:18:41,400 --> 00:18:43,400
Sexological bodywork
includes one-way touch...
635
00:18:43,440 --> 00:18:45,280
Sexological bodywork
includes one-way touch...
636
00:18:45,320 --> 00:18:46,520
Can I? Yeah.
637
00:18:46,560 --> 00:18:48,120
Here.
638
00:18:48,160 --> 00:18:49,800
Oh!
639
00:18:49,840 --> 00:18:51,840
..allowing Ilil, with consent,
to help Joy discover pleasure.
640
00:18:51,880 --> 00:18:53,880
..allowing Ilil, with consent,
to help Joy discover pleasure.
641
00:18:53,920 --> 00:18:54,160
..allowing Ilil, with consent,
to help Joy discover pleasure.
642
00:18:54,200 --> 00:18:56,080
So how does it feel?
643
00:18:56,120 --> 00:18:57,680
It feels really good.
644
00:18:57,720 --> 00:18:59,440
I can feel arousal.
645
00:18:59,480 --> 00:19:00,760
That's new.
646
00:19:06,520 --> 00:19:08,360
Awesome.
647
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:10,400
Thank you very much for
giving me this experience.
648
00:19:10,440 --> 00:19:11,400
Thank you very much for
giving me this experience.
649
00:19:11,440 --> 00:19:13,280
It's such a precious feeling.
650
00:19:13,320 --> 00:19:15,280
It feels...
651
00:19:15,320 --> 00:19:16,520
..really special.
652
00:19:18,400 --> 00:19:20,400
It's like she's safe.
653
00:19:20,440 --> 00:19:20,640
It's like she's safe.
654
00:19:20,680 --> 00:19:22,200
She's safe. She's good.
655
00:19:23,640 --> 00:19:25,160
You got her. Yeah.
656
00:19:26,440 --> 00:19:28,080
And I know what she looks like
now as well.
657
00:19:34,240 --> 00:19:35,640
Hiya!
658
00:19:35,680 --> 00:19:37,480
How was your thingy?
659
00:19:37,520 --> 00:19:39,520
Um, it was really good.
660
00:19:39,560 --> 00:19:40,360
Um, it was really good.
661
00:19:40,400 --> 00:19:42,200
Was it? Yeah, it was really good.
662
00:19:42,240 --> 00:19:44,240
She was like, "You need to focus on
what feels good for you."
663
00:19:44,280 --> 00:19:44,800
She was like, "You need to focus on
what feels good for you."
664
00:19:44,840 --> 00:19:46,840
I think it's just like, "Really?"
665
00:19:46,880 --> 00:19:47,080
I think it's just like, "Really?"
666
00:19:47,120 --> 00:19:48,840
I'm allowed?!
667
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:50,880
I feel really good.
I feel really good, yeah.
668
00:19:50,920 --> 00:19:51,560
I feel really good.
I feel really good, yeah.
669
00:19:51,600 --> 00:19:53,600
I just keep learning all these
things about myself.
670
00:19:53,640 --> 00:19:53,920
I just keep learning all these
things about myself.
671
00:19:53,960 --> 00:19:55,960
So proud to really connect
with my body
672
00:19:56,000 --> 00:19:56,280
So proud to really connect
with my body
673
00:19:56,320 --> 00:19:58,320
and so pleased that I felt like
we just had this breakthrough.
674
00:19:58,360 --> 00:19:58,680
and so pleased that I felt like
we just had this breakthrough.
675
00:20:01,480 --> 00:20:03,480
Joy has leapt forwards,
but not everyone is riding high.
676
00:20:03,520 --> 00:20:05,520
Joy has leapt forwards,
but not everyone is riding high.
677
00:20:05,560 --> 00:20:05,840
Joy has leapt forwards,
but not everyone is riding high.
678
00:20:05,880 --> 00:20:07,880
Bertie, would you like to join us,
slash, would you like a blanket?
679
00:20:07,920 --> 00:20:08,600
Bertie, would you like to join us,
slash, would you like a blanket?
680
00:20:08,640 --> 00:20:10,640
Um... Go on, then.
681
00:20:10,680 --> 00:20:11,200
Um... Go on, then.
682
00:20:11,240 --> 00:20:13,240
What, "go on, then" to the blanket
or "go on, then" to joining us?
683
00:20:13,280 --> 00:20:13,920
What, "go on, then" to the blanket
or "go on, then" to joining us?
684
00:20:13,960 --> 00:20:15,960
I'll see what... I'll see.
See how you feel.
685
00:20:16,000 --> 00:20:16,400
I'll see what... I'll see.
See how you feel.
686
00:20:16,440 --> 00:20:18,120
Yeah. I think it's quite a chill
convo at the moment.
687
00:20:18,160 --> 00:20:19,680
Yeah, I'll see what I can do.
688
00:20:19,720 --> 00:20:21,720
Lovely to talk to you.
Nice to talk to you. Yeah.
689
00:20:21,760 --> 00:20:22,760
Lovely to talk to you.
Nice to talk to you. Yeah.
690
00:20:22,800 --> 00:20:24,800
I can socialise, don't worry.
I know you can!
691
00:20:24,840 --> 00:20:25,080
I can socialise, don't worry.
I know you can!
692
00:20:25,120 --> 00:20:26,080
I'm just inviting you to.
693
00:20:26,120 --> 00:20:27,240
I'll see.
694
00:20:29,080 --> 00:20:31,080
Da-da-da.
695
00:20:31,120 --> 00:20:31,280
Da-da-da.
696
00:20:42,560 --> 00:20:44,560
Here are the clipboards.
697
00:20:44,600 --> 00:20:46,600
It's late afternoon.
698
00:20:46,640 --> 00:20:47,000
It's late afternoon.
699
00:20:47,040 --> 00:20:48,720
"This questionnaire
is multiple choice.
700
00:20:48,760 --> 00:20:50,120
"Please choose all that apply."
701
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:53,200
To help the group explore the type
of person that turns them on...
702
00:20:53,240 --> 00:20:54,760
To help the group explore the type
of person that turns them on...
703
00:20:54,800 --> 00:20:56,840
I've put boobs so far.
704
00:20:56,880 --> 00:20:58,880
..the experts have handed out
a list of questions.
705
00:20:58,920 --> 00:20:59,880
..the experts have handed out
a list of questions.
706
00:20:59,920 --> 00:21:01,920
HE CHUCKLES
Body hair.
707
00:21:01,960 --> 00:21:02,240
HE CHUCKLES
Body hair.
708
00:21:02,280 --> 00:21:04,280
I like my girls
with a full beard, mate.
709
00:21:04,320 --> 00:21:05,400
I like my girls
with a full beard, mate.
710
00:21:05,440 --> 00:21:07,440
Face shape.
I've never thought about this.
711
00:21:07,480 --> 00:21:07,920
Face shape.
I've never thought about this.
712
00:21:07,960 --> 00:21:09,800
What's mine? Sq...
713
00:21:09,840 --> 00:21:11,840
Are you calling me a square?
714
00:21:11,880 --> 00:21:12,080
Are you calling me a square?
715
00:21:12,120 --> 00:21:13,480
THEY LAUGH
716
00:21:13,520 --> 00:21:15,520
I don't think the colour of hair
or the colour of eyes matter,
717
00:21:15,560 --> 00:21:17,560
I don't think the colour of hair
or the colour of eyes matter,
718
00:21:17,600 --> 00:21:19,360
I don't think the colour of hair
or the colour of eyes matter,
719
00:21:19,400 --> 00:21:21,400
as long as the hair
looks presentable.
720
00:21:21,440 --> 00:21:22,320
as long as the hair
looks presentable.
721
00:21:22,360 --> 00:21:23,960
Great hygiene.
722
00:21:24,000 --> 00:21:26,000
Yeah. Clean hands, clean nails.
723
00:21:26,040 --> 00:21:26,200
Yeah. Clean hands, clean nails.
724
00:21:27,600 --> 00:21:29,600
And they've gotta have -
I'm gonna put banter.
725
00:21:29,640 --> 00:21:31,640
And they've gotta have -
I'm gonna put banter.
726
00:21:31,680 --> 00:21:31,920
And they've gotta have -
I'm gonna put banter.
727
00:21:31,960 --> 00:21:33,720
You know, a bit of banter!
728
00:21:35,240 --> 00:21:37,240
For Marianne, the questionnaire
proves revealing.
729
00:21:37,280 --> 00:21:38,240
For Marianne, the questionnaire
proves revealing.
730
00:21:39,440 --> 00:21:41,440
"Ideal first date setting."
731
00:21:41,480 --> 00:21:41,960
"Ideal first date setting."
732
00:21:42,000 --> 00:21:44,000
I just want to go hiking
and then have a picnic somewhere,
733
00:21:44,040 --> 00:21:45,240
I just want to go hiking
and then have a picnic somewhere,
734
00:21:45,280 --> 00:21:47,160
but then I don't really
necessarily want to be alone
735
00:21:47,200 --> 00:21:49,200
with a guy hiking
on a first date. Yeah.
736
00:21:49,240 --> 00:21:49,600
with a guy hiking
on a first date. Yeah.
737
00:21:49,640 --> 00:21:51,640
It depends on how safe I feel,
you know?
738
00:21:51,680 --> 00:21:51,880
It depends on how safe I feel,
you know?
739
00:21:53,960 --> 00:21:55,960
{\an8}A lot goes on in my head
all the time
740
00:21:56,000 --> 00:21:57,640
{\an8}A lot goes on in my head
all the time
741
00:21:57,680 --> 00:21:59,680
because I was diagnosed with ADHD
when I was about four,
742
00:21:59,720 --> 00:22:00,560
because I was diagnosed with ADHD
when I was about four,
743
00:22:00,600 --> 00:22:02,200
and there's just a lot of emotions.
744
00:22:02,240 --> 00:22:04,240
Like, I'm never not thinking
about safety.
745
00:22:04,280 --> 00:22:05,200
Like, I'm never not thinking
about safety.
746
00:22:05,240 --> 00:22:07,240
Like, when people do one-night
stands, in my head, I'm like,
747
00:22:07,280 --> 00:22:07,520
Like, when people do one-night
stands, in my head, I'm like,
748
00:22:07,560 --> 00:22:08,800
"X, Y, Z could go wrong.
749
00:22:08,840 --> 00:22:10,680
"How are you going to an
unknown place?"
750
00:22:10,720 --> 00:22:12,720
My brain goes sort of
into overdrive.
751
00:22:12,760 --> 00:22:12,960
My brain goes sort of
into overdrive.
752
00:22:14,000 --> 00:22:16,000
I don't trust men.
753
00:22:16,040 --> 00:22:16,920
I don't trust men.
754
00:22:16,960 --> 00:22:18,720
Right. We're done and dusted.
755
00:22:18,760 --> 00:22:20,280
High five.
756
00:22:20,320 --> 00:22:21,480
Cool.
757
00:22:21,520 --> 00:22:23,480
Yeah, I know it is me,
758
00:22:23,520 --> 00:22:25,240
but I don't know
how to move forward.
759
00:22:28,880 --> 00:22:30,880
{\an8}Marianne is very much in her head.
760
00:22:30,920 --> 00:22:32,040
{\an8}Marianne is very much in her head.
761
00:22:32,080 --> 00:22:34,080
She's trying to manage
762
00:22:34,120 --> 00:22:34,360
She's trying to manage
763
00:22:34,400 --> 00:22:36,400
her boundaries,
so she won't get hurt.
764
00:22:36,440 --> 00:22:37,120
her boundaries,
so she won't get hurt.
765
00:22:38,480 --> 00:22:40,480
And in that way,
she is holding herself back
766
00:22:40,520 --> 00:22:40,880
And in that way,
she is holding herself back
767
00:22:40,920 --> 00:22:42,920
from fully experiencing life.
768
00:22:42,960 --> 00:22:43,120
from fully experiencing life.
769
00:22:44,840 --> 00:22:46,840
Good to see you.
770
00:22:46,880 --> 00:22:47,240
Good to see you.
771
00:22:47,280 --> 00:22:49,280
Danielle wants to try and help
Marianne confront her barriers.
772
00:22:49,320 --> 00:22:51,320
Danielle wants to try and help
Marianne confront her barriers.
773
00:22:51,360 --> 00:22:51,760
Danielle wants to try and help
Marianne confront her barriers.
774
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,800
What do you want for yourself
in the retreat?
775
00:22:53,840 --> 00:22:54,400
What do you want for yourself
in the retreat?
776
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,440
When it comes to sort of intimacy,
I always just have...
777
00:22:56,480 --> 00:22:57,400
When it comes to sort of intimacy,
I always just have...
778
00:22:57,440 --> 00:22:59,440
My first thought is just safety.
779
00:22:59,480 --> 00:23:00,160
My first thought is just safety.
780
00:23:00,200 --> 00:23:02,200
So a lot of what you're trying
to do now is really, like,
781
00:23:02,240 --> 00:23:03,560
So a lot of what you're trying
to do now is really, like,
782
00:23:03,600 --> 00:23:05,360
keep yourself in check.
783
00:23:06,680 --> 00:23:08,120
It...
784
00:23:08,160 --> 00:23:10,120
It just feels like
785
00:23:10,160 --> 00:23:12,160
I'm all alone and
I have to put up a guard.
786
00:23:12,200 --> 00:23:12,480
I'm all alone and
I have to put up a guard.
787
00:23:12,520 --> 00:23:14,080
I'm just saying sort of
no to everything
788
00:23:14,120 --> 00:23:16,120
and I think my younger self
feels quite sad
789
00:23:16,160 --> 00:23:16,920
and I think my younger self
feels quite sad
790
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:18,720
that I'm still stuck
with that feeling.
791
00:23:29,040 --> 00:23:31,040
I feel like I had a lot of issues
growing up in South Africa.
792
00:23:31,080 --> 00:23:32,480
I feel like I had a lot of issues
growing up in South Africa.
793
00:23:32,520 --> 00:23:34,520
In school, I was one of
three mixed-race girls,
794
00:23:34,560 --> 00:23:35,480
In school, I was one of
three mixed-race girls,
795
00:23:35,520 --> 00:23:37,520
and we didn't really know how to
fit in because we weren't, like,
796
00:23:37,560 --> 00:23:38,280
and we didn't really know how to
fit in because we weren't, like,
797
00:23:38,320 --> 00:23:40,320
black enough or the black guys,
white enough for the white guys.
798
00:23:40,360 --> 00:23:41,960
black enough or the black guys,
white enough for the white guys.
799
00:23:42,000 --> 00:23:44,000
I get viewed as this exotic thing.
800
00:23:44,040 --> 00:23:45,200
I get viewed as this exotic thing.
801
00:23:45,240 --> 00:23:46,440
Sweetheart.
802
00:23:46,480 --> 00:23:48,480
Is it OK if I put my hand
on your knee? That's fine.
803
00:23:48,520 --> 00:23:49,360
Is it OK if I put my hand
on your knee? That's fine.
804
00:23:49,400 --> 00:23:51,400
It has been sort of, like,
a competition with guys.
805
00:23:51,440 --> 00:23:52,160
It has been sort of, like,
a competition with guys.
806
00:23:52,200 --> 00:23:53,520
They would never be
in a relationship with us,
807
00:23:53,560 --> 00:23:55,560
but they just want to, like,
get our clothes off.
808
00:23:55,600 --> 00:23:55,880
but they just want to, like,
get our clothes off.
809
00:23:55,920 --> 00:23:57,920
And so it's really, really hard
for me to, like, trust men.
810
00:23:57,960 --> 00:23:59,960
And so it's really, really hard
for me to, like, trust men.
811
00:24:00,000 --> 00:24:00,280
And so it's really, really hard
for me to, like, trust men.
812
00:24:01,800 --> 00:24:03,800
I just feel...
813
00:24:03,840 --> 00:24:04,120
I just feel...
814
00:24:04,160 --> 00:24:05,840
Yeah. ..that I'm missing out
on things
815
00:24:05,880 --> 00:24:07,800
and I can't differentiate, like,
816
00:24:07,840 --> 00:24:09,840
what's actual fear
and what's just, like...
817
00:24:09,880 --> 00:24:10,360
what's actual fear
and what's just, like...
818
00:24:10,400 --> 00:24:12,160
Protection. Yeah.
819
00:24:13,520 --> 00:24:15,000
Can I please have a hug?
820
00:24:15,040 --> 00:24:17,040
Oh, I would love to.
821
00:24:17,080 --> 00:24:17,280
Oh, I would love to.
822
00:24:20,960 --> 00:24:22,960
Marianne needs to learn
to trust that men
823
00:24:23,000 --> 00:24:24,000
Marianne needs to learn
to trust that men
824
00:24:24,040 --> 00:24:26,040
don't necessarily want to
take advantage of her.
825
00:24:26,080 --> 00:24:27,960
don't necessarily want to
take advantage of her.
826
00:24:28,000 --> 00:24:30,000
And working with the men
to deal with all those issues,
827
00:24:30,040 --> 00:24:31,720
And working with the men
to deal with all those issues,
828
00:24:31,760 --> 00:24:33,760
that's her biggest challenge
on the island.
829
00:24:33,800 --> 00:24:35,080
that's her biggest challenge
on the island.
830
00:24:43,480 --> 00:24:45,480
Thank you so much. My pleasure.
831
00:24:45,520 --> 00:24:45,680
Thank you so much. My pleasure.
832
00:24:47,760 --> 00:24:49,760
I knew I was going to be emotional,
but everything sort of hit me.
833
00:24:49,800 --> 00:24:51,560
I knew I was going to be emotional,
but everything sort of hit me.
834
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:01,200
It was nice to have this session
because, like, I can just
835
00:25:01,240 --> 00:25:02,720
It was nice to have this session
because, like, I can just
836
00:25:02,760 --> 00:25:04,760
think more clearly about
what's to come,
837
00:25:04,800 --> 00:25:05,360
think more clearly about
what's to come,
838
00:25:05,400 --> 00:25:07,400
but that's quite daunting.
839
00:25:07,440 --> 00:25:07,600
but that's quite daunting.
840
00:25:21,840 --> 00:25:23,200
{\an8}Morning. Morning.
841
00:25:23,240 --> 00:25:24,400
Morning, Marianne.
842
00:25:25,520 --> 00:25:27,520
Another day begins
on Virgin Island...
843
00:25:27,560 --> 00:25:28,080
Another day begins
on Virgin Island...
844
00:25:29,280 --> 00:25:31,280
Oh, got hot dog down my boob.
LAUGHTER
845
00:25:31,320 --> 00:25:32,560
Oh, got hot dog down my boob.
LAUGHTER
846
00:25:32,600 --> 00:25:34,600
That'll be a treat
for someone later!
847
00:25:34,640 --> 00:25:34,840
That'll be a treat
for someone later!
848
00:25:35,800 --> 00:25:37,800
..and it's the turn-ons phase
of the course.
849
00:25:37,840 --> 00:25:38,720
..and it's the turn-ons phase
of the course.
850
00:25:38,760 --> 00:25:40,760
Nothing like a proper cuppa.
851
00:25:40,800 --> 00:25:41,000
Nothing like a proper cuppa.
852
00:25:41,040 --> 00:25:43,040
This phase is pretty intimidating.
853
00:25:43,080 --> 00:25:43,880
This phase is pretty intimidating.
854
00:25:43,920 --> 00:25:45,920
I always thought myself
as dead playful, dead flirty,
855
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:47,840
I always thought myself
as dead playful, dead flirty,
856
00:25:47,880 --> 00:25:49,880
but I started being
really sheltered.
857
00:25:49,920 --> 00:25:50,200
but I started being
really sheltered.
858
00:25:50,240 --> 00:25:52,240
So I do feel like
I've got a lot to learn.
859
00:25:52,280 --> 00:25:52,480
So I do feel like
I've got a lot to learn.
860
00:25:54,600 --> 00:25:56,600
I personally feel a bit deflated,
861
00:25:56,640 --> 00:25:57,360
I personally feel a bit deflated,
862
00:25:57,400 --> 00:25:58,960
a bit dejected.
863
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:00,680
I'm lagging behind.
864
00:26:00,720 --> 00:26:02,720
I know it's a marathon
and not a sprint,
865
00:26:02,760 --> 00:26:03,000
I know it's a marathon
and not a sprint,
866
00:26:03,040 --> 00:26:04,520
but some people are running.
867
00:26:05,600 --> 00:26:07,080
I'm trudging.
868
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:11,400
The phase is exposing
deep-seated fears.
869
00:26:11,440 --> 00:26:12,280
The phase is exposing
deep-seated fears.
870
00:26:14,760 --> 00:26:16,760
When it comes to younger people,
around intimacy and touch,
871
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,720
When it comes to younger people,
around intimacy and touch,
872
00:26:18,760 --> 00:26:20,720
there's just a lot more
self-consciousness.
873
00:26:20,760 --> 00:26:22,120
A lot of people are afraid,
you know -
874
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:24,160
"Oh, maybe I'm going to get
cancelled or cross a boundary."
875
00:26:24,200 --> 00:26:24,960
"Oh, maybe I'm going to get
cancelled or cross a boundary."
876
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:26,840
Nowadays, there is a lot of risk
877
00:26:26,880 --> 00:26:28,480
in saying the wrong thing.
878
00:26:28,520 --> 00:26:30,520
Like, if I make a weird,
stupid mistake
879
00:26:30,560 --> 00:26:30,960
Like, if I make a weird,
stupid mistake
880
00:26:31,000 --> 00:26:33,000
talking to a girl,
that's done, isn't it?
881
00:26:33,040 --> 00:26:33,560
talking to a girl,
that's done, isn't it?
882
00:26:33,600 --> 00:26:35,120
I don't want to do something wrong.
883
00:26:35,160 --> 00:26:36,960
I don't want to do
things too fast
884
00:26:37,000 --> 00:26:38,640
or too slow.
885
00:26:38,680 --> 00:26:40,520
If I do come across
as a creep in any way,
886
00:26:40,560 --> 00:26:42,400
shape or form, I don't mean to.
887
00:26:42,440 --> 00:26:44,440
I'm so scared of the thought
of that happening.
888
00:26:44,480 --> 00:26:45,160
I'm so scared of the thought
of that happening.
889
00:26:45,200 --> 00:26:46,520
What do you think we're gonna do?
890
00:26:46,560 --> 00:26:48,240
I have no idea.
891
00:26:49,600 --> 00:26:51,600
Having already worked on
discovering their turn-ons...
892
00:26:51,640 --> 00:26:52,680
Having already worked on
discovering their turn-ons...
893
00:26:52,720 --> 00:26:54,560
Oh, this is so scary.
894
00:26:55,760 --> 00:26:57,520
..Celeste and Danielle
now want the group
895
00:26:57,560 --> 00:26:59,560
to feel it in their bodies.
896
00:26:59,600 --> 00:26:59,840
to feel it in their bodies.
897
00:26:59,880 --> 00:27:01,880
This is a really safe place
that we can practise
898
00:27:01,920 --> 00:27:02,800
This is a really safe place
that we can practise
899
00:27:02,840 --> 00:27:04,840
touching all over
each other's bodies.
900
00:27:04,880 --> 00:27:05,160
touching all over
each other's bodies.
901
00:27:05,200 --> 00:27:07,200
This exercise can definitely
get people aroused
902
00:27:07,240 --> 00:27:07,800
This exercise can definitely
get people aroused
903
00:27:07,840 --> 00:27:09,840
and frankly, I hope it does.
904
00:27:09,880 --> 00:27:10,040
and frankly, I hope it does.
905
00:27:13,840 --> 00:27:15,520
OK.
906
00:27:15,560 --> 00:27:17,560
One of the things that really
gets in the way of us
907
00:27:17,600 --> 00:27:18,360
One of the things that really
gets in the way of us
908
00:27:18,400 --> 00:27:20,400
feeling our turn-ons is inhibition.
909
00:27:20,440 --> 00:27:21,000
feeling our turn-ons is inhibition.
910
00:27:21,040 --> 00:27:23,040
And today's workshop is all about
letting out your inner animal.
911
00:27:23,080 --> 00:27:25,080
And today's workshop is all about
letting out your inner animal.
912
00:27:25,120 --> 00:27:26,280
And today's workshop is all about
letting out your inner animal.
913
00:27:30,760 --> 00:27:32,280
So we're going to do a little demo
914
00:27:32,320 --> 00:27:34,320
and then you'll get a chance
to practise with each other.
915
00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:34,560
and then you'll get a chance
to practise with each other.
916
00:27:36,040 --> 00:27:38,040
Sex doesn't have to be this thing
that is very curated.
917
00:27:38,080 --> 00:27:39,320
Sex doesn't have to be this thing
that is very curated.
918
00:27:39,360 --> 00:27:41,360
It can be animalistic and fun.
919
00:27:41,400 --> 00:27:42,240
It can be animalistic and fun.
920
00:27:42,280 --> 00:27:44,280
Animal game, you don't need much
to be good at it.
921
00:27:44,320 --> 00:27:44,760
Animal game, you don't need much
to be good at it.
922
00:27:44,800 --> 00:27:46,800
It's more about connecting
with your own impulses
923
00:27:46,840 --> 00:27:48,040
It's more about connecting
with your own impulses
924
00:27:48,080 --> 00:27:50,080
and unleashing your inner animal.
925
00:27:50,120 --> 00:27:50,520
and unleashing your inner animal.
926
00:27:50,560 --> 00:27:52,560
THEY MOAN
927
00:27:52,600 --> 00:27:53,920
THEY MOAN
928
00:27:53,960 --> 00:27:55,960
There's another animal
just next to you.
929
00:27:56,000 --> 00:27:58,000
There's another animal
just next to you.
930
00:27:58,040 --> 00:27:59,080
There's another animal
just next to you.
931
00:27:59,120 --> 00:28:01,120
You can smell.
932
00:28:01,160 --> 00:28:01,480
You can smell.
933
00:28:04,400 --> 00:28:06,400
THEY MOAN
934
00:28:06,440 --> 00:28:08,440
THEY MOAN
935
00:28:08,480 --> 00:28:09,200
THEY MOAN
936
00:28:16,120 --> 00:28:18,120
THEY MOAN
937
00:28:18,160 --> 00:28:20,160
THEY MOAN
938
00:28:20,200 --> 00:28:22,120
THEY MOAN
939
00:28:34,760 --> 00:28:36,760
THEY LAUGH
940
00:28:36,800 --> 00:28:38,360
THEY LAUGH
941
00:28:38,400 --> 00:28:40,120
Love-gasm!
942
00:28:40,160 --> 00:28:42,160
THEY LAUGH
943
00:28:42,200 --> 00:28:43,920
THEY LAUGH
944
00:28:43,960 --> 00:28:45,960
APPLAUSE
945
00:28:46,000 --> 00:28:46,480
APPLAUSE
946
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:48,000
OK.
947
00:28:48,040 --> 00:28:50,040
I'm looking for a brave volunteer.
948
00:28:50,080 --> 00:28:51,360
I'm looking for a brave volunteer.
949
00:28:55,680 --> 00:28:57,680
Bertie? I've got an injured foot.
950
00:28:57,720 --> 00:28:58,240
Bertie? I've got an injured foot.
951
00:28:58,280 --> 00:28:59,640
I know it sounds like a lame excuse,
952
00:28:59,680 --> 00:29:01,680
but with my foot
and everything, it's...
953
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:02,280
but with my foot
and everything, it's...
954
00:29:02,320 --> 00:29:04,320
OK. Anyone else?
955
00:29:04,360 --> 00:29:04,600
OK. Anyone else?
956
00:29:04,640 --> 00:29:06,080
Can I do it with you,
Marianne? Yeah!
957
00:29:06,120 --> 00:29:08,120
I'm going to go with Marianne.
Great, wonderful.
958
00:29:08,160 --> 00:29:08,400
I'm going to go with Marianne.
Great, wonderful.
959
00:29:11,080 --> 00:29:13,080
Joy takes the opportunity
to practise with a woman.
960
00:29:13,120 --> 00:29:14,080
Joy takes the opportunity
to practise with a woman.
961
00:29:16,400 --> 00:29:18,400
So just take some nice,
deep breaths,
962
00:29:18,440 --> 00:29:20,240
So just take some nice,
deep breaths,
963
00:29:20,280 --> 00:29:22,280
in and out.
964
00:29:22,320 --> 00:29:23,040
in and out.
965
00:29:23,080 --> 00:29:25,080
When you feel ready, start exploring
each other with your hands.
966
00:29:25,120 --> 00:29:27,120
When you feel ready, start exploring
each other with your hands.
967
00:29:27,160 --> 00:29:28,360
When you feel ready, start exploring
each other with your hands.
968
00:29:33,560 --> 00:29:35,560
Good. I love that you're staying
with the sensation
969
00:29:35,600 --> 00:29:36,640
Good. I love that you're staying
with the sensation
970
00:29:36,680 --> 00:29:38,320
and with your own bodies.
971
00:29:41,560 --> 00:29:43,560
THEY GIGGLE
972
00:29:43,600 --> 00:29:44,880
THEY GIGGLE
973
00:29:49,440 --> 00:29:51,440
APPLAUSE
974
00:29:51,480 --> 00:29:53,040
APPLAUSE
975
00:29:53,080 --> 00:29:55,000
And how was that for you?
976
00:29:55,040 --> 00:29:56,880
Marianne made me feel very safe.
977
00:29:56,920 --> 00:29:58,440
Same! It was very fun.
978
00:30:01,600 --> 00:30:03,600
As more of the group step up...
979
00:30:03,640 --> 00:30:03,920
As more of the group step up...
980
00:30:03,960 --> 00:30:05,960
Just follow what your body
wants to do.
981
00:30:06,000 --> 00:30:06,480
Just follow what your body
wants to do.
982
00:30:08,800 --> 00:30:10,800
..their animal instincts
start to emerge.
983
00:30:10,840 --> 00:30:11,640
..their animal instincts
start to emerge.
984
00:30:13,920 --> 00:30:15,920
Touching and sensing.
985
00:30:15,960 --> 00:30:17,240
Touching and sensing.
986
00:30:21,680 --> 00:30:23,680
Woohoo!
APPLAUSE
987
00:30:23,720 --> 00:30:24,880
Woohoo!
APPLAUSE
988
00:30:24,920 --> 00:30:25,960
Anyone else?
989
00:30:28,800 --> 00:30:29,880
Fuck it.
990
00:30:29,920 --> 00:30:31,920
Yes, Bertie.
CHEERING
991
00:30:31,960 --> 00:30:32,680
Yes, Bertie.
CHEERING
992
00:30:32,720 --> 00:30:34,720
Up until now,
Bertie keeps holding back.
993
00:30:34,760 --> 00:30:35,880
Up until now,
Bertie keeps holding back.
994
00:30:35,920 --> 00:30:37,840
If I don't do it now,
I'll regret it later.
995
00:30:39,040 --> 00:30:41,040
I think this is the worst time
to be a young adult,
996
00:30:41,080 --> 00:30:43,080
I think this is the worst time
to be a young adult,
997
00:30:43,120 --> 00:30:43,680
I think this is the worst time
to be a young adult,
998
00:30:43,720 --> 00:30:45,720
because if you're someone like me
who struggles with
999
00:30:45,760 --> 00:30:47,240
because if you're someone like me
who struggles with
1000
00:30:47,280 --> 00:30:49,280
approaching and talking to women,
1001
00:30:49,320 --> 00:30:49,880
approaching and talking to women,
1002
00:30:49,920 --> 00:30:51,560
it's near impossible.
1003
00:30:51,600 --> 00:30:53,160
Right.
1004
00:30:53,200 --> 00:30:55,200
I constantly think about
what I could do wrong,
1005
00:30:55,240 --> 00:30:56,520
I constantly think about
what I could do wrong,
1006
00:30:56,560 --> 00:30:58,560
rather than what I could do right.
1007
00:30:58,600 --> 00:30:58,920
rather than what I could do right.
1008
00:30:58,960 --> 00:31:00,960
But I have to do this because
I want to improve my life.
1009
00:31:01,000 --> 00:31:02,240
But I have to do this because
I want to improve my life.
1010
00:31:05,240 --> 00:31:07,240
Start noticing that there's
an animal inside you
1011
00:31:07,280 --> 00:31:09,280
Start noticing that there's
an animal inside you
1012
00:31:09,320 --> 00:31:10,520
Start noticing that there's
an animal inside you
1013
00:31:10,560 --> 00:31:12,560
and you can rub against them.
1014
00:31:12,600 --> 00:31:12,840
and you can rub against them.
1015
00:31:14,440 --> 00:31:16,440
Mm.
1016
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:18,200
You can hold.
1017
00:31:18,240 --> 00:31:19,760
Oh!
BERTIE LAUGHS
1018
00:31:19,800 --> 00:31:21,680
Are you OK? I'm good, yeah.
1019
00:31:21,720 --> 00:31:23,480
Are you sure? Yeah, I'm fine. OK.
1020
00:31:23,520 --> 00:31:25,520
You get in a comfy position. Yeah.
1021
00:31:25,560 --> 00:31:26,120
You get in a comfy position. Yeah.
1022
00:31:32,120 --> 00:31:34,120
That's OK. Yeah?
1023
00:31:34,160 --> 00:31:34,440
That's OK. Yeah?
1024
00:31:34,480 --> 00:31:36,480
Let yourself feel how good it feels.
1025
00:31:36,520 --> 00:31:37,600
Let yourself feel how good it feels.
1026
00:31:51,560 --> 00:31:53,560
APPLAUSE
1027
00:31:53,600 --> 00:31:54,000
APPLAUSE
1028
00:31:54,040 --> 00:31:56,040
Amazing.
You want to share a little bit?
1029
00:31:56,080 --> 00:31:56,360
Amazing.
You want to share a little bit?
1030
00:31:56,400 --> 00:31:58,400
I was a bit apprehensive
about doing it at first.
1031
00:31:58,440 --> 00:31:59,760
I mean, I thought you were
doing a good job.
1032
00:31:59,800 --> 00:32:01,800
It just all felt natural
and, like, really nice.
1033
00:32:01,840 --> 00:32:02,280
It just all felt natural
and, like, really nice.
1034
00:32:02,320 --> 00:32:03,840
You've got nice hair
to touch as well.
1035
00:32:03,880 --> 00:32:05,880
All that wax has come in handy.
That's what it is.
1036
00:32:05,920 --> 00:32:06,160
All that wax has come in handy.
That's what it is.
1037
00:32:06,200 --> 00:32:08,200
APPLAUSE
1038
00:32:08,240 --> 00:32:10,240
APPLAUSE
1039
00:32:10,280 --> 00:32:11,080
APPLAUSE
1040
00:32:11,120 --> 00:32:12,160
There we go.
1041
00:32:12,200 --> 00:32:13,720
Well done to you. Thank you.
1042
00:32:19,920 --> 00:32:21,680
So how was that?
1043
00:32:21,720 --> 00:32:23,240
LAUGHTER
1044
00:32:23,280 --> 00:32:25,280
I was still in that, like, "Ooh!"
1045
00:32:25,320 --> 00:32:25,520
I was still in that, like, "Ooh!"
1046
00:32:25,560 --> 00:32:27,080
Like, frisky mood, let's say.
1047
00:32:27,120 --> 00:32:29,120
And I was like, "OK, so I'm gonna
just have to calm myself back down
1048
00:32:29,160 --> 00:32:29,960
And I was like, "OK, so I'm gonna
just have to calm myself back down
1049
00:32:30,000 --> 00:32:31,520
"and start from Bertie's level."
1050
00:32:33,040 --> 00:32:35,040
All right, Bertie? Hello.
How did you find it?
1051
00:32:35,080 --> 00:32:35,760
All right, Bertie? Hello.
How did you find it?
1052
00:32:35,800 --> 00:32:37,800
Good, good. You had the right amount
of pressure on me that I like.
1053
00:32:37,840 --> 00:32:39,000
Good, good. You had the right amount
of pressure on me that I like.
1054
00:32:39,040 --> 00:32:41,040
It felt so natural.
And I was like, "This is..."
1055
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:41,520
It felt so natural.
And I was like, "This is..."
1056
00:32:41,560 --> 00:32:43,560
Yeah. Oh!
1057
00:32:43,600 --> 00:32:43,840
Yeah. Oh!
1058
00:32:43,880 --> 00:32:45,800
To say this is one of the
bravest things I've done
1059
00:32:45,840 --> 00:32:47,840
would be the understatement
of the millennium.
1060
00:32:47,880 --> 00:32:48,760
would be the understatement
of the millennium.
1061
00:32:48,800 --> 00:32:50,800
This isn't peer pressure
or anything like that.
1062
00:32:50,840 --> 00:32:51,360
This isn't peer pressure
or anything like that.
1063
00:32:51,400 --> 00:32:53,400
I just feel like I kind of
have to participate
1064
00:32:53,440 --> 00:32:55,280
I just feel like I kind of
have to participate
1065
00:32:55,320 --> 00:32:57,320
because if I am going on this island
1066
00:32:57,360 --> 00:32:58,160
because if I am going on this island
1067
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,200
to be the same old person
1068
00:33:00,240 --> 00:33:00,480
to be the same old person
1069
00:33:00,520 --> 00:33:02,520
that I was for all my life,
what am I doing here?
1070
00:33:02,560 --> 00:33:03,320
that I was for all my life,
what am I doing here?
1071
00:33:06,480 --> 00:33:08,480
As the course is going on, I can see
people learning and changing.
1072
00:33:08,520 --> 00:33:10,040
As the course is going on, I can see
people learning and changing.
1073
00:33:10,080 --> 00:33:11,760
Everybody's trying new things,
1074
00:33:11,800 --> 00:33:13,800
but for some people,
therapy is very slow
1075
00:33:13,840 --> 00:33:14,800
but for some people,
therapy is very slow
1076
00:33:14,840 --> 00:33:16,840
and totally goes at the
pace of the client.
1077
00:33:16,880 --> 00:33:17,240
and totally goes at the
pace of the client.
1078
00:33:22,560 --> 00:33:24,560
Bertie may be working things out,
1079
00:33:24,600 --> 00:33:25,160
Bertie may be working things out,
1080
00:33:25,200 --> 00:33:27,200
but discovering turn-ons
for some is slow progress.
1081
00:33:27,240 --> 00:33:28,560
but discovering turn-ons
for some is slow progress.
1082
00:33:28,600 --> 00:33:30,600
Guys, do you like hairy vaginas?
1083
00:33:30,640 --> 00:33:31,920
Guys, do you like hairy vaginas?
1084
00:33:31,960 --> 00:33:33,960
I actually don't care. Yeah.
Each to their own.
1085
00:33:34,000 --> 00:33:35,280
I actually don't care. Yeah.
Each to their own.
1086
00:33:35,320 --> 00:33:37,320
When it starts coming out of their
knicker line and you're like,
1087
00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:37,680
When it starts coming out of their
knicker line and you're like,
1088
00:33:37,720 --> 00:33:39,360
"Oh, God, you need to shave."
1089
00:33:39,400 --> 00:33:41,200
Oh, no.
1090
00:33:41,240 --> 00:33:43,240
I don't really look after myself
very much, but, you know.
1091
00:33:43,280 --> 00:33:43,680
I don't really look after myself
very much, but, you know.
1092
00:33:43,720 --> 00:33:45,640
No-one's seeing it, so...
1093
00:33:45,680 --> 00:33:47,680
After this, that won't be true.
1094
00:33:47,720 --> 00:33:48,040
After this, that won't be true.
1095
00:33:48,080 --> 00:33:50,080
LAUGHTER
1096
00:33:50,120 --> 00:33:51,000
LAUGHTER
1097
00:33:51,040 --> 00:33:53,040
Intimacy is challenging
for everyone on the island,
1098
00:33:53,080 --> 00:33:54,680
Intimacy is challenging
for everyone on the island,
1099
00:33:54,720 --> 00:33:56,720
but for 21-year-old Callum,
it's also linked to tragedy.
1100
00:33:56,760 --> 00:33:58,760
but for 21-year-old Callum,
it's also linked to tragedy.
1101
00:33:58,800 --> 00:33:59,040
but for 21-year-old Callum,
it's also linked to tragedy.
1102
00:33:59,080 --> 00:34:01,080
My dad passed away two years ago.
1103
00:34:01,120 --> 00:34:01,400
My dad passed away two years ago.
1104
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:03,440
He was an alcoholic.
1105
00:34:03,480 --> 00:34:04,240
He was an alcoholic.
1106
00:34:04,280 --> 00:34:05,240
Um...
1107
00:34:07,120 --> 00:34:09,120
I don't really know
how to respond to it.
1108
00:34:09,160 --> 00:34:10,120
I don't really know
how to respond to it.
1109
00:34:11,320 --> 00:34:13,320
I'm living on my own in his house,
where he used to live,
1110
00:34:13,360 --> 00:34:14,080
I'm living on my own in his house,
where he used to live,
1111
00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:16,120
and probably spend...
1112
00:34:16,160 --> 00:34:16,600
and probably spend...
1113
00:34:16,640 --> 00:34:18,640
It's probably about
16 hours a day, gaming.
1114
00:34:18,680 --> 00:34:20,480
It's probably about
16 hours a day, gaming.
1115
00:34:20,520 --> 00:34:22,520
I suppose it is a way to escape
everything in the world.
1116
00:34:22,560 --> 00:34:24,520
I suppose it is a way to escape
everything in the world.
1117
00:34:24,560 --> 00:34:26,560
I struggle to meet people in person.
1118
00:34:26,600 --> 00:34:27,040
I struggle to meet people in person.
1119
00:34:27,080 --> 00:34:29,080
It makes me feel alone.
1120
00:34:29,120 --> 00:34:30,240
It makes me feel alone.
1121
00:34:33,720 --> 00:34:35,720
The experts want Callum
to tackle his grief...
1122
00:34:35,760 --> 00:34:36,400
The experts want Callum
to tackle his grief...
1123
00:34:37,880 --> 00:34:39,160
Hi. Hello!
1124
00:34:39,200 --> 00:34:41,200
..with clinical therapist Abby.
1125
00:34:41,240 --> 00:34:41,400
..with clinical therapist Abby.
1126
00:34:44,680 --> 00:34:46,680
Are there times in your life
where you felt uncomfortable
1127
00:34:46,720 --> 00:34:47,640
Are there times in your life
where you felt uncomfortable
1128
00:34:47,680 --> 00:34:49,200
talking about these things?
1129
00:34:49,240 --> 00:34:50,880
Yeah, I think so.
1130
00:34:50,920 --> 00:34:52,840
I'm never really honest or open.
1131
00:34:52,880 --> 00:34:54,560
I think it was when my dad passed
1132
00:34:54,600 --> 00:34:56,600
that I really started to notice
a lot of the stuff about myself.
1133
00:34:56,640 --> 00:34:57,560
that I really started to notice
a lot of the stuff about myself.
1134
00:34:57,600 --> 00:34:59,480
Talk to me a little bit about that.
1135
00:34:59,520 --> 00:35:01,520
HE SIGHS
1136
00:35:01,560 --> 00:35:01,800
HE SIGHS
1137
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:03,840
I really punished myself
about everything.
1138
00:35:03,880 --> 00:35:04,080
I really punished myself
about everything.
1139
00:35:05,120 --> 00:35:07,120
Yeah, he got admitted to hospital
because he'd fallen.
1140
00:35:07,160 --> 00:35:08,360
Yeah, he got admitted to hospital
because he'd fallen.
1141
00:35:08,400 --> 00:35:10,400
He was on the floor for two days
and he couldn't get up.
1142
00:35:10,440 --> 00:35:10,800
He was on the floor for two days
and he couldn't get up.
1143
00:35:10,840 --> 00:35:12,760
He couldn't reach his phone
to tell anyone.
1144
00:35:12,800 --> 00:35:14,800
Yeah. And the next day,
being told that,
1145
00:35:14,840 --> 00:35:16,080
Yeah. And the next day,
being told that,
1146
00:35:16,120 --> 00:35:18,120
you know, he's not got
long left to live, so...
1147
00:35:18,160 --> 00:35:18,360
you know, he's not got
long left to live, so...
1148
00:35:19,320 --> 00:35:21,320
He died within two weeks. Yeah.
1149
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:21,560
He died within two weeks. Yeah.
1150
00:35:21,600 --> 00:35:23,600
He got... Oh! It's OK.
1151
00:35:23,640 --> 00:35:24,840
He got... Oh! It's OK.
1152
00:35:24,880 --> 00:35:26,680
HE SIGHS
Liver cirrhosis.
1153
00:35:26,720 --> 00:35:28,720
Talk about the feeling that
comes up around that.
1154
00:35:28,760 --> 00:35:29,080
Talk about the feeling that
comes up around that.
1155
00:35:29,120 --> 00:35:31,120
I still feel like I failed him.
1156
00:35:31,160 --> 00:35:32,080
I still feel like I failed him.
1157
00:35:32,120 --> 00:35:34,120
That's not...
It's not for you to take on.
1158
00:35:34,160 --> 00:35:34,960
That's not...
It's not for you to take on.
1159
00:35:39,040 --> 00:35:41,040
Is it reasonable for you to
take responsibility of that?
1160
00:35:41,080 --> 00:35:41,640
Is it reasonable for you to
take responsibility of that?
1161
00:35:41,680 --> 00:35:42,800
Maybe not.
1162
00:35:45,240 --> 00:35:47,040
What are the thoughts
running in your head?
1163
00:35:49,840 --> 00:35:51,240
Regret. Yeah.
1164
00:35:56,040 --> 00:35:58,040
I just want to make him proud
and not flatten his name.
1165
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,080
I just want to make him proud
and not flatten his name.
1166
00:36:00,120 --> 00:36:00,680
I just want to make him proud
and not flatten his name.
1167
00:36:02,960 --> 00:36:04,120
You're making him proud.
1168
00:36:11,960 --> 00:36:13,960
It was really emotional
because a lot of it is
1169
00:36:14,000 --> 00:36:14,520
It was really emotional
because a lot of it is
1170
00:36:14,560 --> 00:36:16,560
shit, basically,
that I hate dealing with.
1171
00:36:16,600 --> 00:36:17,520
shit, basically,
that I hate dealing with.
1172
00:36:17,560 --> 00:36:19,560
But I've never really had
that emotional response
1173
00:36:19,600 --> 00:36:20,520
But I've never really had
that emotional response
1174
00:36:20,560 --> 00:36:22,560
and spoke properly with someone
who understands it,
1175
00:36:22,600 --> 00:36:23,640
and spoke properly with someone
who understands it,
1176
00:36:23,680 --> 00:36:25,680
and it's kind of a fuzzy feeling.
1177
00:36:25,720 --> 00:36:26,600
and it's kind of a fuzzy feeling.
1178
00:36:26,640 --> 00:36:28,320
I just feel...
1179
00:36:28,360 --> 00:36:30,360
I feel like I want to let off steam.
I want to run around.
1180
00:36:30,400 --> 00:36:30,840
I feel like I want to let off steam.
I want to run around.
1181
00:36:36,680 --> 00:36:38,240
Hello! Hello.
1182
00:36:38,280 --> 00:36:40,000
Hello. How did it go?
1183
00:36:40,040 --> 00:36:41,160
Very emotional.
1184
00:36:41,200 --> 00:36:43,200
Looking at shit from a
different angle, I suppose.
1185
00:36:43,240 --> 00:36:44,080
Looking at shit from a
different angle, I suppose.
1186
00:36:44,120 --> 00:36:46,120
Do you feel good that it's been,
like, off your chest?
1187
00:36:46,160 --> 00:36:46,600
Do you feel good that it's been,
like, off your chest?
1188
00:36:46,640 --> 00:36:47,920
Mm.
1189
00:36:47,960 --> 00:36:49,840
Tell you what, though,
it's so hot in the tepee.
1190
00:36:49,880 --> 00:36:51,880
I sweated it all out, so...
LAUGHTER
1191
00:36:51,920 --> 00:36:52,240
I sweated it all out, so...
LAUGHTER
1192
00:36:52,280 --> 00:36:54,280
It wasn't tears. It was just
sweat coming out of your eyes.
1193
00:36:54,320 --> 00:36:54,600
It wasn't tears. It was just
sweat coming out of your eyes.
1194
00:36:54,640 --> 00:36:56,640
Yeah, yeah. It weren't tears, no.
1195
00:36:56,680 --> 00:36:57,080
Yeah, yeah. It weren't tears, no.
1196
00:37:07,040 --> 00:37:08,360
{\an8}Are you going to bomb it in?
1197
00:37:08,400 --> 00:37:09,680
Yeah, yeah.
1198
00:37:09,720 --> 00:37:11,200
It's late afternoon...
1199
00:37:11,240 --> 00:37:13,240
He just, like, glided in.
1200
00:37:13,280 --> 00:37:14,320
He just, like, glided in.
1201
00:37:14,360 --> 00:37:16,360
..and many of the group
are embracing island life.
1202
00:37:16,400 --> 00:37:17,880
..and many of the group
are embracing island life.
1203
00:37:17,920 --> 00:37:19,440
To be a man, hey?
1204
00:37:19,480 --> 00:37:21,480
Get your hair wet and just, like,
come out and be fine. Yeah, yeah.
1205
00:37:21,520 --> 00:37:21,800
Get your hair wet and just, like,
come out and be fine. Yeah, yeah.
1206
00:37:21,840 --> 00:37:23,840
Not need your make-up.
No moisturiser. Yeah.
1207
00:37:23,880 --> 00:37:24,120
Not need your make-up.
No moisturiser. Yeah.
1208
00:37:24,160 --> 00:37:26,000
Not need to, like, shower.
1209
00:37:26,040 --> 00:37:28,000
Well, I think men need showers.
1210
00:37:28,040 --> 00:37:29,720
I hope they shower.
1211
00:37:31,280 --> 00:37:33,280
As some take a dip,
1212
00:37:33,320 --> 00:37:35,320
the experts have decided it's time
for others to immerse themselves
1213
00:37:35,360 --> 00:37:36,840
the experts have decided it's time
for others to immerse themselves
1214
00:37:36,880 --> 00:37:38,880
in the retreat's most
advanced therapy,
1215
00:37:38,920 --> 00:37:39,520
in the retreat's most
advanced therapy,
1216
00:37:39,560 --> 00:37:41,560
undertaken by three specialists.
1217
00:37:41,600 --> 00:37:42,760
undertaken by three specialists.
1218
00:37:42,800 --> 00:37:44,800
Surrogate partner therapy works with
a surrogate partner and the client,
1219
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:46,680
Surrogate partner therapy works with
a surrogate partner and the client,
1220
00:37:46,720 --> 00:37:48,720
practising with everything from
different kinds of touch,
1221
00:37:48,760 --> 00:37:49,640
practising with everything from
different kinds of touch,
1222
00:37:49,680 --> 00:37:51,680
through genital touching,
oral sex or even intercourse,
1223
00:37:51,720 --> 00:37:53,280
through genital touching,
oral sex or even intercourse,
1224
00:37:53,320 --> 00:37:54,920
so that people can practise
1225
00:37:54,960 --> 00:37:56,960
the full range of
sexual experiences.
1226
00:37:57,000 --> 00:37:58,040
the full range of
sexual experiences.
1227
00:37:58,080 --> 00:38:00,080
First is 35-year-old Ellen.
1228
00:38:00,120 --> 00:38:00,800
First is 35-year-old Ellen.
1229
00:38:00,840 --> 00:38:02,440
Hello! Hello.
1230
00:38:03,840 --> 00:38:05,560
While all surrogate partner therapy
1231
00:38:05,600 --> 00:38:07,600
is supported by
clinical therapist Abby...
1232
00:38:07,640 --> 00:38:08,240
is supported by
clinical therapist Abby...
1233
00:38:08,280 --> 00:38:10,280
What I do is therapeutic
emotional discussion.
1234
00:38:10,320 --> 00:38:12,320
What I do is therapeutic
emotional discussion.
1235
00:38:12,360 --> 00:38:12,640
What I do is therapeutic
emotional discussion.
1236
00:38:12,680 --> 00:38:14,680
..Kat will be Ellen's surrogate
partner therapist.
1237
00:38:14,720 --> 00:38:15,240
..Kat will be Ellen's surrogate
partner therapist.
1238
00:38:15,280 --> 00:38:17,280
So I do the relationship side.
1239
00:38:17,320 --> 00:38:17,560
So I do the relationship side.
1240
00:38:17,600 --> 00:38:19,520
Doing touch work
and relational work's,
1241
00:38:19,560 --> 00:38:21,560
like, completely led by you. OK.
1242
00:38:21,600 --> 00:38:22,560
like, completely led by you. OK.
1243
00:38:22,600 --> 00:38:24,600
And hands are, like, really
important in lesbian sex.
1244
00:38:24,640 --> 00:38:25,880
And hands are, like, really
important in lesbian sex.
1245
00:38:25,920 --> 00:38:27,360
Yeah. Yeah.
1246
00:38:27,400 --> 00:38:29,400
Meanwhile, Tegan will wear it with
surrogate partner therapist Risdon.
1247
00:38:29,440 --> 00:38:31,240
Meanwhile, Tegan will wear it with
surrogate partner therapist Risdon.
1248
00:38:31,280 --> 00:38:33,280
And notice the sensation
of me touching you.
1249
00:38:33,320 --> 00:38:35,320
And notice the sensation
of me touching you.
1250
00:38:35,360 --> 00:38:35,560
And notice the sensation
of me touching you.
1251
00:38:39,040 --> 00:38:40,200
How did that feel?
1252
00:38:40,240 --> 00:38:42,240
It felt good. It felt really nice.
OK, great.
1253
00:38:42,280 --> 00:38:43,080
It felt good. It felt really nice.
OK, great.
1254
00:38:43,120 --> 00:38:45,120
But before Marianne can consider
a surrogate relationship,
1255
00:38:45,160 --> 00:38:46,640
But before Marianne can consider
a surrogate relationship,
1256
00:38:46,680 --> 00:38:48,680
she first has to learn to trust men.
1257
00:38:48,720 --> 00:38:49,240
she first has to learn to trust men.
1258
00:38:50,480 --> 00:38:52,480
It gets to a point where
I can feel the energy,
1259
00:38:52,520 --> 00:38:52,800
It gets to a point where
I can feel the energy,
1260
00:38:52,840 --> 00:38:54,840
I can feel they want more,
and I can't cross the boundary.
1261
00:38:54,880 --> 00:38:56,160
I can feel they want more,
and I can't cross the boundary.
1262
00:38:56,200 --> 00:38:58,200
I just can't.
My brain just gets stuck.
1263
00:38:58,240 --> 00:38:59,080
I just can't.
My brain just gets stuck.
1264
00:38:59,120 --> 00:39:00,400
I really want to challenge myself.
1265
00:39:00,440 --> 00:39:02,280
I want to do it with a guy
and see how I feel.
1266
00:39:06,600 --> 00:39:08,440
{\an8}Trust is everything.
1267
00:39:08,480 --> 00:39:10,480
{\an8}Out of all my friends,
I'm the only virgin.
1268
00:39:10,520 --> 00:39:10,760
{\an8}Out of all my friends,
I'm the only virgin.
1269
00:39:10,800 --> 00:39:12,840
And I do feel lonely.
1270
00:39:12,880 --> 00:39:14,880
But I do want to be in a
relationship with someone.
1271
00:39:14,920 --> 00:39:16,240
But I do want to be in a
relationship with someone.
1272
00:39:16,280 --> 00:39:18,280
If I haven't figured it out
by 26 years,
1273
00:39:18,320 --> 00:39:19,080
If I haven't figured it out
by 26 years,
1274
00:39:19,120 --> 00:39:20,800
then clearly I do need some help.
1275
00:39:22,000 --> 00:39:23,760
First step for Marianne...
1276
00:39:23,800 --> 00:39:25,560
Hello.
1277
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:27,600
..is simply being comfortable
in the same room
1278
00:39:27,640 --> 00:39:28,240
..is simply being comfortable
in the same room
1279
00:39:28,280 --> 00:39:30,280
as potential surrogate
partner, Andre.
1280
00:39:30,320 --> 00:39:30,920
as potential surrogate
partner, Andre.
1281
00:39:32,360 --> 00:39:33,680
How are you feeling now?
1282
00:39:33,720 --> 00:39:35,720
A little bit anxious in my stomach.
OK. Um...
1283
00:39:35,760 --> 00:39:36,400
A little bit anxious in my stomach.
OK. Um...
1284
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:38,440
And that's just because of
unknowns and things. Yeah.
1285
00:39:38,480 --> 00:39:40,400
And that's just because of
unknowns and things. Yeah.
1286
00:39:40,440 --> 00:39:42,040
Working with Marianne,
1287
00:39:42,080 --> 00:39:44,080
it's very important that
we start slowly
1288
00:39:44,120 --> 00:39:44,520
it's very important that
we start slowly
1289
00:39:44,560 --> 00:39:46,560
to build the trust in myself.
1290
00:39:46,600 --> 00:39:47,560
to build the trust in myself.
1291
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:49,600
I'm going to be moving
around the room
1292
00:39:49,640 --> 00:39:50,400
I'm going to be moving
around the room
1293
00:39:50,440 --> 00:39:52,440
and going to be noticing
1294
00:39:52,480 --> 00:39:52,720
and going to be noticing
1295
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:54,760
how your body is reacting
to where I am.
1296
00:39:54,800 --> 00:39:55,840
how your body is reacting
to where I am.
1297
00:39:55,880 --> 00:39:57,880
The idea is just to learn how
someone being close to you
1298
00:39:57,920 --> 00:39:59,360
The idea is just to learn how
someone being close to you
1299
00:39:59,400 --> 00:40:01,400
can potentially feel. Yeah.
1300
00:40:01,440 --> 00:40:02,440
can potentially feel. Yeah.
1301
00:40:02,480 --> 00:40:04,080
OK. So go ahead and close your eyes.
1302
00:40:11,480 --> 00:40:13,360
And so I've moved.
1303
00:40:13,400 --> 00:40:15,400
You might feel I'm further away.
1304
00:40:15,440 --> 00:40:16,600
You might feel I'm further away.
1305
00:40:20,960 --> 00:40:22,960
See if there's any noticeable
change in sensation.
1306
00:40:23,000 --> 00:40:25,000
See if there's any noticeable
change in sensation.
1307
00:40:25,040 --> 00:40:25,880
See if there's any noticeable
change in sensation.
1308
00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:30,280
Growing up, I really never saw
how a relationship should be.
1309
00:40:30,320 --> 00:40:32,320
Growing up, I really never saw
how a relationship should be.
1310
00:40:32,360 --> 00:40:34,120
Growing up, I really never saw
how a relationship should be.
1311
00:40:34,160 --> 00:40:36,200
My dad just wasn't there.
1312
00:40:36,240 --> 00:40:38,240
And seven, eight years ago,
I found out I had a new half-sister.
1313
00:40:38,280 --> 00:40:40,280
And seven, eight years ago,
I found out I had a new half-sister.
1314
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:42,320
My dad was sort of
collecting many families.
1315
00:40:42,360 --> 00:40:43,360
My dad was sort of
collecting many families.
1316
00:40:44,440 --> 00:40:45,480
Yeah.
1317
00:40:47,800 --> 00:40:49,800
Just noticing what's happening
in your body.
1318
00:40:49,840 --> 00:40:50,080
Just noticing what's happening
in your body.
1319
00:40:51,360 --> 00:40:53,360
So anything that reminds me of
my dad, you're instantly vetoed.
1320
00:40:53,400 --> 00:40:54,440
So anything that reminds me of
my dad, you're instantly vetoed.
1321
00:40:54,480 --> 00:40:56,400
Trust-wise, I'm very sceptical.
1322
00:41:00,600 --> 00:41:02,600
What was, like, kind of
going on in your head?
1323
00:41:02,640 --> 00:41:03,440
What was, like, kind of
going on in your head?
1324
00:41:03,480 --> 00:41:05,280
By the end,
1325
00:41:05,320 --> 00:41:07,320
I liked it. Hmm.
1326
00:41:07,360 --> 00:41:07,560
I liked it. Hmm.
1327
00:41:07,600 --> 00:41:09,600
It just felt warm by the end.
1328
00:41:09,640 --> 00:41:10,520
It just felt warm by the end.
1329
00:41:10,560 --> 00:41:12,560
I felt, if I'm being honest,
more sort of turned on
1330
00:41:12,600 --> 00:41:14,000
I felt, if I'm being honest,
more sort of turned on
1331
00:41:14,040 --> 00:41:16,040
with the second one that was there,
for some reason.
1332
00:41:16,080 --> 00:41:16,320
with the second one that was there,
for some reason.
1333
00:41:16,360 --> 00:41:18,360
Yeah. Wonderful. OK, great.
1334
00:41:18,400 --> 00:41:19,000
Yeah. Wonderful. OK, great.
1335
00:41:19,040 --> 00:41:21,040
I feel a lot more relaxed, yeah.
Good.
1336
00:41:21,080 --> 00:41:22,840
I feel a lot more relaxed, yeah.
Good.
1337
00:41:22,880 --> 00:41:24,520
After the exercise...
1338
00:41:24,560 --> 00:41:26,560
Want a hug? I would love a hug.
1339
00:41:26,600 --> 00:41:28,600
..Marianne is clearly calmer.
1340
00:41:28,640 --> 00:41:28,800
..Marianne is clearly calmer.
1341
00:41:29,880 --> 00:41:31,880
It helps that you smell like
salted caramel.
1342
00:41:31,920 --> 00:41:32,160
It helps that you smell like
salted caramel.
1343
00:41:32,200 --> 00:41:34,000
Mm. Do I really? Yeah.
1344
00:41:34,040 --> 00:41:36,040
It's very, like... I like that.
1345
00:41:36,080 --> 00:41:36,240
It's very, like... I like that.
1346
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:39,280
I'm feeling a lot more reassured
working with a guy.
1347
00:41:39,320 --> 00:41:41,040
I'm feeling a lot more reassured
working with a guy.
1348
00:41:41,080 --> 00:41:43,080
He's very lovely
and I felt very relaxed.
1349
00:41:43,120 --> 00:41:43,600
He's very lovely
and I felt very relaxed.
1350
00:41:44,800 --> 00:41:46,800
It has helped my brain not be as...
1351
00:41:46,840 --> 00:41:48,840
It has helped my brain not be as...
1352
00:41:48,880 --> 00:41:49,080
It has helped my brain not be as...
1353
00:41:49,120 --> 00:41:50,560
..fearful.
1354
00:41:50,600 --> 00:41:52,120
I'm really proud of myself.
1355
00:41:55,800 --> 00:41:57,800
Hi! Hi, Marianne. Welcome back!
1356
00:41:57,840 --> 00:41:58,040
Hi! Hi, Marianne. Welcome back!
1357
00:41:58,080 --> 00:41:59,600
How did your one-to-one go?
1358
00:41:59,640 --> 00:42:01,360
It was good.
1359
00:42:01,400 --> 00:42:02,880
Hell, yeah. Nice, dude.
1360
00:42:02,920 --> 00:42:04,920
How many people can actually fit in
this bed? That's the real question.
1361
00:42:04,960 --> 00:42:05,320
How many people can actually fit in
this bed? That's the real question.
1362
00:42:05,360 --> 00:42:07,360
Bertie, do you want to come
join us in the bed?
1363
00:42:07,400 --> 00:42:08,160
Bertie, do you want to come
join us in the bed?
1364
00:42:08,200 --> 00:42:09,720
Um... Actually, please do.
1365
00:42:09,760 --> 00:42:11,760
It's an open invitation.
1366
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:12,000
It's an open invitation.
1367
00:42:12,040 --> 00:42:13,120
All right. No worries.
1368
00:42:15,080 --> 00:42:17,080
After getting back on track earlier,
1369
00:42:17,120 --> 00:42:17,360
After getting back on track earlier,
1370
00:42:17,400 --> 00:42:19,400
the experts don't want Bertie
to lose momentum again.
1371
00:42:19,440 --> 00:42:21,200
the experts don't want Bertie
to lose momentum again.
1372
00:42:21,240 --> 00:42:22,440
Bertie jumped up. I thought he was
1373
00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:24,480
going to use his foot as an excuse,
but he didn't.
1374
00:42:24,520 --> 00:42:24,760
going to use his foot as an excuse,
but he didn't.
1375
00:42:24,800 --> 00:42:26,640
And he was so good.
1376
00:42:26,680 --> 00:42:28,680
He seemed so sensual, so, like, um,
animalistic.
1377
00:42:28,720 --> 00:42:30,720
He seemed so sensual, so, like, um,
animalistic.
1378
00:42:30,760 --> 00:42:31,240
He seemed so sensual, so, like, um,
animalistic.
1379
00:42:31,280 --> 00:42:33,280
It's really important
that he feels successful. Yeah.
1380
00:42:33,320 --> 00:42:33,760
It's really important
that he feels successful. Yeah.
1381
00:42:35,320 --> 00:42:37,320
When it comes to dating and sex,
1382
00:42:37,360 --> 00:42:39,000
When it comes to dating and sex,
1383
00:42:39,040 --> 00:42:41,040
I just want to be able
to be more confident
1384
00:42:41,080 --> 00:42:41,320
I just want to be able
to be more confident
1385
00:42:41,360 --> 00:42:43,360
in myself and know what I'm doing.
1386
00:42:43,400 --> 00:42:43,640
in myself and know what I'm doing.
1387
00:42:43,680 --> 00:42:45,680
Because the thought
of me approaching
1388
00:42:45,720 --> 00:42:47,240
Because the thought
of me approaching
1389
00:42:47,280 --> 00:42:49,280
a woman and asking them out,
it would make them think,
1390
00:42:49,320 --> 00:42:50,480
a woman and asking them out,
it would make them think,
1391
00:42:50,520 --> 00:42:52,520
"Oh, God, this is embarrassing.
1392
00:42:52,560 --> 00:42:52,800
"Oh, God, this is embarrassing.
1393
00:42:52,840 --> 00:42:54,840
"What have I done to deserve being
asked out by Bertie?"
1394
00:42:54,880 --> 00:42:55,880
"What have I done to deserve being
asked out by Bertie?"
1395
00:42:58,240 --> 00:43:00,240
To help boost his confidence...
Good afternoon. Good afternoon.
1396
00:43:00,280 --> 00:43:01,080
To help boost his confidence...
Good afternoon. Good afternoon.
1397
00:43:02,240 --> 00:43:04,240
..Celeste wants
to push Bertie's boundaries.
1398
00:43:04,280 --> 00:43:05,760
..Celeste wants
to push Bertie's boundaries.
1399
00:43:05,800 --> 00:43:07,800
How was the workshop for you?
I know I got a few things wrong,
1400
00:43:07,840 --> 00:43:08,720
How was the workshop for you?
I know I got a few things wrong,
1401
00:43:08,760 --> 00:43:10,760
but that was the first time I didn't
really feel uncomfortable.
1402
00:43:10,800 --> 00:43:12,360
but that was the first time I didn't
really feel uncomfortable.
1403
00:43:12,400 --> 00:43:14,080
I was super proud and impressed,
1404
00:43:14,120 --> 00:43:16,120
and I think we can use this
session to just do more kinds
1405
00:43:16,160 --> 00:43:17,280
and I think we can use this
session to just do more kinds
1406
00:43:17,320 --> 00:43:19,320
of practices that will
be helpful for you.
1407
00:43:19,360 --> 00:43:19,680
of practices that will
be helpful for you.
1408
00:43:19,720 --> 00:43:21,640
Sounds good.
..to get more technique together.
1409
00:43:21,680 --> 00:43:22,760
Good job I brushed my teeth, then!
1410
00:43:27,480 --> 00:43:28,920
Celeste starts...
1411
00:43:28,960 --> 00:43:30,960
So try to, like, lay me back.
1412
00:43:31,000 --> 00:43:31,400
So try to, like, lay me back.
1413
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:33,320
Like this? Yeah, exactly.
1414
00:43:33,360 --> 00:43:35,360
..simulating the missionary
position...
1415
00:43:35,400 --> 00:43:36,080
..simulating the missionary
position...
1416
00:43:36,120 --> 00:43:38,120
How am I going to do this?
It'll be awkward at first. Yeah.
1417
00:43:38,160 --> 00:43:38,480
How am I going to do this?
It'll be awkward at first. Yeah.
1418
00:43:38,520 --> 00:43:40,520
So don't worry about that, OK?
OK.
1419
00:43:40,560 --> 00:43:40,800
So don't worry about that, OK?
OK.
1420
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:42,840
..teaching Bertie the basics.
1421
00:43:42,880 --> 00:43:43,120
..teaching Bertie the basics.
1422
00:43:43,160 --> 00:43:45,160
And then you want to line up so that
your dick is connected to my pussy.
1423
00:43:45,200 --> 00:43:47,200
And then you want to line up so that
your dick is connected to my pussy.
1424
00:43:47,240 --> 00:43:47,800
And then you want to line up so that
your dick is connected to my pussy.
1425
00:43:47,840 --> 00:43:49,840
Oh, God. OK. OK!
1426
00:43:49,880 --> 00:43:50,600
Oh, God. OK. OK!
1427
00:43:50,640 --> 00:43:52,080
Right. Right?
1428
00:43:52,120 --> 00:43:53,560
Like this? Yeah, exactly.
1429
00:43:53,600 --> 00:43:55,080
CELESTE LAUGHS
1430
00:43:58,680 --> 00:44:00,680
And you'll need to hold
up some of your weight.
1431
00:44:00,720 --> 00:44:01,480
And you'll need to hold
up some of your weight.
1432
00:44:01,520 --> 00:44:02,880
Yeah. Sorry. No, it's OK.
1433
00:44:02,920 --> 00:44:04,920
And if you want me to show you what
I mean, I'm happy to do that.
1434
00:44:04,960 --> 00:44:05,440
And if you want me to show you what
I mean, I'm happy to do that.
1435
00:44:05,480 --> 00:44:07,480
That's fine. You can if you want to.
Well, if you lie down...
1436
00:44:07,520 --> 00:44:08,360
That's fine. You can if you want to.
Well, if you lie down...
1437
00:44:10,440 --> 00:44:12,440
OK, so if I'm on top of you...
Yeah.
1438
00:44:12,480 --> 00:44:12,920
OK, so if I'm on top of you...
Yeah.
1439
00:44:12,960 --> 00:44:14,960
See how, like, I'm not all the way
down?
1440
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:15,280
See how, like, I'm not all the way
down?
1441
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:17,320
Yeah, no. It's just a little
too much pressure on the chest.
1442
00:44:17,360 --> 00:44:18,520
Yeah, no. It's just a little
too much pressure on the chest.
1443
00:44:23,360 --> 00:44:24,440
But when you thrust,
1444
00:44:24,480 --> 00:44:26,480
I want you to imagine that your
cock is going inside my vagina.
1445
00:44:26,520 --> 00:44:27,960
I want you to imagine that your
cock is going inside my vagina.
1446
00:44:28,000 --> 00:44:29,120
Like... This?
1447
00:44:29,160 --> 00:44:31,160
Yes, exactly. Yes, yes!
1448
00:44:31,200 --> 00:44:31,720
Yes, exactly. Yes, yes!
1449
00:44:34,280 --> 00:44:36,040
You want to try doggy?
Let's try it. OK!
1450
00:44:38,880 --> 00:44:40,880
Then you get between my legs. Yep.
1451
00:44:40,920 --> 00:44:41,280
Then you get between my legs. Yep.
1452
00:44:41,320 --> 00:44:42,800
And you pull me up.
1453
00:44:42,840 --> 00:44:44,640
Exactly!
1454
00:44:44,680 --> 00:44:46,520
You can kind of be all the way up.
1455
00:44:46,560 --> 00:44:48,560
Yes. Yes. Yes.
1456
00:44:48,600 --> 00:44:48,800
Yes. Yes. Yes.
1457
00:44:48,840 --> 00:44:50,840
Good. Yeah. Like that.
1458
00:44:50,880 --> 00:44:52,680
Good. Yeah. Like that.
1459
00:44:52,720 --> 00:44:53,680
Oh...
1460
00:44:55,840 --> 00:44:57,840
Thank you very much.
I feel light-headed.
1461
00:44:57,880 --> 00:44:58,120
Thank you very much.
I feel light-headed.
1462
00:44:58,160 --> 00:44:59,960
Oh, yes. I bet!
1463
00:45:00,000 --> 00:45:02,000
You are an absolute miracle worker.
1464
00:45:02,040 --> 00:45:04,040
I ain't leaving.
And thank you very much.
1465
00:45:04,080 --> 00:45:04,360
I ain't leaving.
And thank you very much.
1466
00:45:04,400 --> 00:45:06,400
I'm just going to be rooting you on
in every moment.
1467
00:45:06,440 --> 00:45:07,200
I'm just going to be rooting you on
in every moment.
1468
00:45:07,240 --> 00:45:08,760
Yeah. I'm proud of you.
1469
00:45:12,960 --> 00:45:14,960
Oh, Bertie, boy! Hiya.
Hello. How was it?
1470
00:45:15,000 --> 00:45:16,040
Oh, Bertie, boy! Hiya.
Hello. How was it?
1471
00:45:16,080 --> 00:45:18,080
Good. Celeste taught me how
certain sexual positions work.
1472
00:45:18,120 --> 00:45:20,120
Good. Celeste taught me how
certain sexual positions work.
1473
00:45:20,160 --> 00:45:21,640
Good. Celeste taught me how
certain sexual positions work.
1474
00:45:21,680 --> 00:45:23,680
Wow. Ooh! So, uh... Yeah.
1475
00:45:23,720 --> 00:45:23,920
Wow. Ooh! So, uh... Yeah.
1476
00:45:23,960 --> 00:45:25,960
I feel very happy at the moment.
1477
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:26,760
I feel very happy at the moment.
1478
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:28,800
It's amazing what a what a bit of,
um,
1479
00:45:28,840 --> 00:45:30,360
It's amazing what a what a bit of,
um,
1480
00:45:30,400 --> 00:45:31,520
rolling round on the floor
1481
00:45:31,560 --> 00:45:33,560
doing different sexual
positions can do to one's mentality.
1482
00:45:33,600 --> 00:45:34,240
doing different sexual
positions can do to one's mentality.
1483
00:45:34,280 --> 00:45:36,280
But I've made progress,
and I'm proud of myself for that.
1484
00:45:36,320 --> 00:45:38,320
But I've made progress,
and I'm proud of myself for that.
1485
00:45:38,360 --> 00:45:39,160
But I've made progress,
and I'm proud of myself for that.
1486
00:45:39,200 --> 00:45:41,200
And I'm thankful for everything
that Celeste has taught me.
1487
00:45:41,240 --> 00:45:42,160
And I'm thankful for everything
that Celeste has taught me.
1488
00:45:43,360 --> 00:45:45,160
Oh, my God.
1489
00:45:47,720 --> 00:45:49,720
All that thrusting
has made me hurt my bollocks.
1490
00:45:49,760 --> 00:45:51,240
All that thrusting
has made me hurt my bollocks.
1491
00:45:52,840 --> 00:45:54,680
Just going to have
to sleep on my back tonight.
1492
00:45:54,720 --> 00:45:55,720
Christ almighty.
1493
00:45:57,040 --> 00:45:58,120
Next time...
1494
00:45:58,160 --> 00:45:59,320
Look at my pussy.
1495
00:45:59,360 --> 00:46:01,240
I'm definitely a lesbian.
1496
00:46:01,280 --> 00:46:03,280
The dating phase panics Ellen.
1497
00:46:03,320 --> 00:46:03,640
The dating phase panics Ellen.
1498
00:46:03,680 --> 00:46:05,120
I just don't feel
like I'm good enough.
1499
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:06,520
MOANING
1500
00:46:06,560 --> 00:46:08,000
Alex ups his game.
1501
00:46:08,040 --> 00:46:09,800
Do you want to see how hard you are?
1502
00:46:09,840 --> 00:46:11,520
And things heat up...
1503
00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:13,560
Cheers.
..with island dates.
1504
00:46:13,600 --> 00:46:13,920
Cheers.
..with island dates.
1505
00:46:13,960 --> 00:46:15,640
I'm so nervous still. Why?
1506
00:46:15,680 --> 00:46:17,120
I think it's cos it's you.
179509
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