All language subtitles for Killing.It.S01E01.720p.WEBRip.H264

af Afrikaans
ak Akan
sq Albanian
am Amharic
ar Arabic
hy Armenian
az Azerbaijani
eu Basque
be Belarusian
bem Bemba
bn Bengali
bh Bihari
bs Bosnian
br Breton
bg Bulgarian
km Cambodian
ca Catalan
ceb Cebuano
chr Cherokee
ny Chichewa
zh-CN Chinese (Simplified)
zh-TW Chinese (Traditional)
co Corsican
hr Croatian
cs Czech
da Danish
nl Dutch
en English
eo Esperanto
et Estonian
ee Ewe
fo Faroese
tl Filipino
fi Finnish
fr French
fy Frisian
gaa Ga
gl Galician
ka Georgian
de German
el Greek
gn Guarani
gu Gujarati
ht Haitian Creole
ha Hausa
haw Hawaiian
iw Hebrew
hi Hindi
hmn Hmong
hu Hungarian
is Icelandic
ig Igbo
id Indonesian
ia Interlingua
ga Irish
it Italian
ja Japanese
jw Javanese
kn Kannada
kk Kazakh
rw Kinyarwanda
rn Kirundi
kg Kongo
ko Korean
kri Krio (Sierra Leone)
ku Kurdish
ckb Kurdish (Soranî)
ky Kyrgyz
lo Laothian
la Latin
lv Latvian
ln Lingala
lt Lithuanian
loz Lozi
lg Luganda
ach Luo
lb Luxembourgish
mk Macedonian
mg Malagasy
ms Malay
ml Malayalam
mt Maltese
mi Maori
mr Marathi
mfe Mauritian Creole
mo Moldavian
mn Mongolian
my Myanmar (Burmese)
sr-ME Montenegrin
ne Nepali
pcm Nigerian Pidgin
nso Northern Sotho
no Norwegian
nn Norwegian (Nynorsk)
oc Occitan
or Oriya
om Oromo
ps Pashto
fa Persian
pl Polish
pt-BR Portuguese (Brazil) Download
pt Portuguese (Portugal)
pa Punjabi
qu Quechua
ro Romanian
rm Romansh
nyn Runyakitara
ru Russian
sm Samoan
gd Scots Gaelic
sr Serbian
sh Serbo-Croatian
st Sesotho
tn Setswana
crs Seychellois Creole
sn Shona
sd Sindhi
si Sinhalese
sk Slovak
sl Slovenian
so Somali
es Spanish
es-419 Spanish (Latin American)
su Sundanese
sw Swahili
sv Swedish
tg Tajik
ta Tamil
tt Tatar
te Telugu
th Thai
ti Tigrinya
to Tonga
lua Tshiluba
tum Tumbuka
tr Turkish
tk Turkmen
tw Twi
ug Uighur
uk Ukrainian
ur Urdu
uz Uzbek
vi Vietnamese
cy Welsh
wo Wolof
xh Xhosa
yi Yiddish
yo Yoruba
zu Zulu
Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:21,521 --> 00:00:23,106 - I know what you're thinking. 2 00:00:23,148 --> 00:00:24,774 "This fucking guy," right? 3 00:00:24,816 --> 00:00:26,484 "Rich prick. 4 00:00:26,526 --> 00:00:28,737 "I mean, damn, that kimono was made to be worn 5 00:00:28,778 --> 00:00:30,155 "for the highest-level state functions 6 00:00:30,196 --> 00:00:31,448 "of the emperor of Japan, 7 00:00:31,489 --> 00:00:34,200 and he's just loungin' around in that shit." 8 00:00:34,242 --> 00:00:36,161 Oh, look at that. 9 00:00:36,202 --> 00:00:38,830 Spilled some osso buco on it. 10 00:00:38,872 --> 00:00:41,833 Oh, well. 11 00:00:41,875 --> 00:00:45,503 But let me be clear about this. 12 00:00:45,545 --> 00:00:49,841 No one just hands you a royal kimono. 13 00:00:49,883 --> 00:00:51,217 Nah. 14 00:00:51,259 --> 00:00:54,054 I came from nothing. 15 00:00:54,095 --> 00:00:56,389 People wanna say the American dream is dead. 16 00:00:56,431 --> 00:00:59,225 Well, that's bullshit, 17 00:00:59,267 --> 00:01:01,436 because the story I'm about to tell you, 18 00:01:01,478 --> 00:01:03,438 my story, 19 00:01:03,480 --> 00:01:06,024 is one that can only happen 20 00:01:06,066 --> 00:01:09,569 in the U.S. of motherfucking A. 21 00:01:12,197 --> 00:01:14,991 Are you even listening to me, Andrea? 22 00:01:15,033 --> 00:01:16,451 - I thought you were on the phone. 23 00:01:16,493 --> 00:01:18,411 - I'm inspiring you with my personal journey. 24 00:01:18,453 --> 00:01:19,913 This is a big deal for you, Andrea. 25 00:01:19,954 --> 00:01:21,414 Pay attention! 26 00:01:27,712 --> 00:01:28,963 - Shut up. 27 00:01:33,510 --> 00:01:35,345 - Get your ass in the store. 28 00:01:44,270 --> 00:01:46,398 - We were in here before. 29 00:01:46,439 --> 00:01:48,316 We took some candy when you weren't looking. 30 00:01:51,986 --> 00:01:53,738 I'm sorry. - Damn right, you sorry. 31 00:01:53,780 --> 00:01:57,075 We are a family that pays for what we get. 32 00:01:57,117 --> 00:01:58,952 - Okay. It's just 30¢. 33 00:01:58,993 --> 00:02:01,496 - Oh, uh, we can't pay for these. 34 00:02:01,538 --> 00:02:02,831 It's not funny. 35 00:02:02,872 --> 00:02:05,417 You know I'm working towards something, Isaiah. 36 00:02:05,458 --> 00:02:07,794 Nobody succeeds overnight. You gotta put the time in. 37 00:02:07,836 --> 00:02:08,837 Ask him. 38 00:02:08,878 --> 00:02:10,588 Was it easy opening this place up? 39 00:02:10,630 --> 00:02:12,173 - No. It took years of hard work. 40 00:02:12,215 --> 00:02:14,259 - You see, boys? Years. 41 00:02:14,300 --> 00:02:16,928 You just gotta keep the faith. 42 00:02:16,970 --> 00:02:18,430 - Dad. 43 00:02:18,471 --> 00:02:19,848 Dad! - What? 44 00:02:21,474 --> 00:02:22,809 - We took more candy. 45 00:02:24,936 --> 00:02:26,813 Give him the candy. 46 00:02:30,066 --> 00:02:31,401 - I'm proud of you, Craig. 47 00:02:33,361 --> 00:02:34,904 - Fucking snitch. 48 00:02:34,946 --> 00:02:36,322 Ah! 49 00:02:36,364 --> 00:02:38,116 - What's the combination, motherfucker? 50 00:02:38,158 --> 00:02:40,410 Stop fucking stalling! 51 00:02:40,452 --> 00:02:42,328 - Be cool. I didn't see anything. 52 00:02:50,045 --> 00:02:51,629 - So how did I get from there 53 00:02:51,671 --> 00:02:54,758 to the splendor and opulence I now inhabit? 54 00:02:54,799 --> 00:02:57,177 Wait, are you crying? Don't cry. 55 00:02:57,218 --> 00:02:59,137 - Oh, Mr. Craig, it's so sad. 56 00:02:59,179 --> 00:03:00,180 - It's not sad. It's inspiring. 57 00:03:00,221 --> 00:03:01,431 - No, it is sad. 58 00:03:01,473 --> 00:03:02,724 - Agree to disagree. 59 00:03:02,766 --> 00:03:04,309 - I lost my cousin when I was eight. 60 00:03:04,351 --> 00:03:05,769 - We're not talking about that now. 61 00:03:05,810 --> 00:03:07,604 Andrea, this is a uplifting interaction. 62 00:03:07,645 --> 00:03:09,105 Cancer. 63 00:03:09,147 --> 00:03:10,148 - Andrea! 64 00:03:16,154 --> 00:03:19,157 It's 4:00 a.m. Miami is asleep. 65 00:03:19,199 --> 00:03:21,034 But me, I'm wide awake. Why? 66 00:03:21,076 --> 00:03:22,660 Am I out at the clubs? 67 00:03:22,702 --> 00:03:24,829 Do I rise with the European markets? 68 00:03:24,871 --> 00:03:26,164 No. 69 00:03:26,206 --> 00:03:27,832 I just really have to pee. 70 00:03:29,459 --> 00:03:32,504 Pause for laughter. Pause for laughter. 71 00:03:32,545 --> 00:03:34,214 This is an all-too-familiar story 72 00:03:34,255 --> 00:03:37,300 for a man of over 40, 50, or even 60. 73 00:03:37,342 --> 00:03:38,677 So what's the deal? 74 00:03:38,718 --> 00:03:40,387 Chances are, you're suffering from 75 00:03:40,428 --> 00:03:42,681 benign prostatic hyperplasia. 76 00:03:42,722 --> 00:03:45,642 In other words, you have an enlarged prostate, son. 77 00:03:46,685 --> 00:03:49,396 That's too Black. That's too Black. 78 00:03:49,437 --> 00:03:52,524 In other words, you have an enlarged prostate, sir. 79 00:03:52,565 --> 00:03:56,319 Frequent need, weak stream, post-urination dribbling-- 80 00:03:56,361 --> 00:03:57,821 this has to stop. 81 00:03:57,862 --> 00:03:59,155 But luckily-- 82 00:03:59,197 --> 00:04:00,782 Nessa, up! 83 00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:02,784 I'm dropping you at your mom's. I have to be at work early. 84 00:04:02,826 --> 00:04:03,827 - In a minute, Dad. 85 00:04:03,868 --> 00:04:05,412 - There's an all-natural supplement 86 00:04:05,453 --> 00:04:07,414 that's proven to work. 87 00:04:07,455 --> 00:04:09,916 Saw palmetto berries. 88 00:04:09,958 --> 00:04:12,502 Pharmaceutical companies are desperate 89 00:04:12,544 --> 00:04:14,504 for these berries. 90 00:04:14,546 --> 00:04:17,632 But they only grow one place in the entire world. 91 00:04:17,674 --> 00:04:18,883 Oh, shit! 92 00:04:18,925 --> 00:04:21,219 - What was that? - Is that an iguana? 93 00:04:21,261 --> 00:04:23,555 Where did it come from? 94 00:04:30,103 --> 00:04:31,563 - It's 'cause of the cold. 95 00:04:31,604 --> 00:04:34,357 They get stunned and start falling out of trees. 96 00:04:34,399 --> 00:04:37,402 Toss him in a bush. He'll warm up eventually. 97 00:04:41,448 --> 00:04:42,699 - You wanna go ahead and grab that for me? 98 00:04:42,741 --> 00:04:45,910 I don't love reptiles-- lizards, snakes, skinks. 99 00:04:45,952 --> 00:04:47,620 - What's a skink? - I don't know what a skink is. 100 00:04:47,662 --> 00:04:49,456 I'm not gonna look that shit up and scare myself. 101 00:04:49,497 --> 00:04:51,124 - Well, I'm not touching that. 102 00:04:51,166 --> 00:04:53,251 - Ugh. I'ma try the wipers. 103 00:04:57,672 --> 00:04:59,382 Ugh! 104 00:05:15,982 --> 00:05:17,108 Damn it. 105 00:05:25,075 --> 00:05:26,910 - It wasn't that big a deal. 106 00:05:26,951 --> 00:05:28,953 - That's 'cause you refused to touch it, Nessa. 107 00:05:30,872 --> 00:05:32,832 - Hey, Camille. 108 00:05:32,874 --> 00:05:35,001 Marco. 109 00:05:35,043 --> 00:05:36,544 Thank you for taking her. 110 00:05:36,586 --> 00:05:38,046 I have to be in early 111 00:05:38,088 --> 00:05:40,215 because I'm actually applying for a business loan. 112 00:05:40,256 --> 00:05:41,633 So I bought this suit. 113 00:05:41,675 --> 00:05:43,176 Fits so nice, it looks like it was painted on. 114 00:05:45,428 --> 00:05:48,390 - Yeah? Good. That's what I was going for. 115 00:05:48,431 --> 00:05:50,934 Oh, you just gonna walk away? Now you can't read my lips. 116 00:05:50,975 --> 00:05:53,645 Boy, that Marco's sure gained some weight, hasn't he? 117 00:05:53,687 --> 00:05:55,105 - He's calling me fat again. 118 00:05:55,146 --> 00:05:56,439 - This is family time, Marco. 119 00:05:56,481 --> 00:05:58,525 You don't need to be here. 120 00:05:58,566 --> 00:05:59,609 - Good luck at your meeting, Dad. 121 00:05:59,651 --> 00:06:00,568 - Thank you, baby. 122 00:06:14,958 --> 00:06:16,251 - Craig, wow! 123 00:06:16,292 --> 00:06:18,336 I barely recognize you out of your guard uniform. 124 00:06:18,378 --> 00:06:19,754 Love the suit. 125 00:06:19,796 --> 00:06:21,881 - I want you to know how serious I am about this. 126 00:06:21,923 --> 00:06:24,509 Can I just start? - Oh. Okay. 127 00:06:24,551 --> 00:06:26,845 All business. 128 00:06:31,057 --> 00:06:32,517 - It's 4:00 a.m. 129 00:06:32,559 --> 00:06:34,561 Miami is asleep. 130 00:06:34,602 --> 00:06:37,022 I'm wide awake. Why? 131 00:06:37,063 --> 00:06:38,481 Am I out at the club? 132 00:06:38,523 --> 00:06:40,358 Do I rise with the European markets? 133 00:06:40,400 --> 00:06:42,652 No. I just really have to pee-- 134 00:06:42,694 --> 00:06:45,030 - Wait, is this a pitch? 135 00:06:45,071 --> 00:06:47,532 Are you applying for a loan? - Yeah. 136 00:06:47,574 --> 00:06:48,825 I told Monica. Did she not-- 137 00:06:48,867 --> 00:06:50,160 - She just said you were coming in. 138 00:06:52,328 --> 00:06:56,499 I thought it was about me going as Shaq for Halloween. 139 00:06:56,541 --> 00:06:57,792 - Why would I wanna come in early 140 00:06:57,834 --> 00:06:59,044 to talk to you about that? 141 00:06:59,085 --> 00:07:01,129 - Somebody wrote a letter to corporate 142 00:07:01,171 --> 00:07:04,341 saying they were offended, and I assumed it was you, 143 00:07:04,382 --> 00:07:05,759 since you're the only... 144 00:07:08,762 --> 00:07:13,183 Person I hadn't asked about it yet. 145 00:07:13,224 --> 00:07:14,851 - It wasn't me. - Because you're cool. 146 00:07:14,893 --> 00:07:17,062 And for the record, I wasn't in blackface. 147 00:07:17,103 --> 00:07:19,522 I had makeup on my arms and chest. 148 00:07:19,564 --> 00:07:21,483 But the face was a mask. 149 00:07:21,524 --> 00:07:23,318 I'm not stupid. 150 00:07:23,360 --> 00:07:26,029 I know the rules. - Okay, so... 151 00:07:26,071 --> 00:07:27,697 can I still do my pitch? - Of course. 152 00:07:27,739 --> 00:07:29,991 Yeah, yeah, yeah. Let's hear it. 153 00:07:30,033 --> 00:07:31,451 - It's 4:00 a.m. 154 00:07:31,493 --> 00:07:33,411 Miami is asleep. 155 00:07:33,453 --> 00:07:34,454 Me? I'm wide awake-- 156 00:07:34,496 --> 00:07:36,748 - The whole thing is just so crazy. 157 00:07:36,790 --> 00:07:39,709 I'm one of the least racist people you'll ever meet. 158 00:07:41,503 --> 00:07:44,089 Sorry, go on. 159 00:07:44,130 --> 00:07:46,466 - So why am I awake? 160 00:07:46,508 --> 00:07:47,634 Am I out at the clubs? 161 00:07:47,676 --> 00:07:49,427 - I'm an advocate for Black people. 162 00:07:49,469 --> 00:07:51,596 I hired you and Gloria. 163 00:07:51,638 --> 00:07:54,683 - Gloria's not Black. - Well, she's something. 164 00:07:57,811 --> 00:07:59,437 - Do I rise with the European markets-- 165 00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:00,605 - I just gotta tell you, 166 00:08:00,647 --> 00:08:03,692 my favorite actor is Jamie Foxx. 167 00:08:04,901 --> 00:08:07,237 - I don't think you're racist, Mr. Franks. 168 00:08:07,278 --> 00:08:09,739 - Thanks. Thank you. 169 00:08:09,781 --> 00:08:12,951 It's so important to me that you know that 170 00:08:12,992 --> 00:08:15,286 because I can't give you a loan. 171 00:08:15,328 --> 00:08:18,289 Our default rate with borrowers from the Black community 172 00:08:18,331 --> 00:08:20,208 is just too high. 173 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:27,716 What is your favorite Jamie Foxx movie? 174 00:08:27,757 --> 00:08:29,050 Mine's "Ray." 175 00:08:31,344 --> 00:08:33,471 So dope. 176 00:08:33,513 --> 00:08:34,723 - I can't believe that shit. 177 00:08:34,764 --> 00:08:36,474 I mean, whose favorite movie is "Ray"? 178 00:08:36,516 --> 00:08:37,809 - That's not what I meant, Isaiah. 179 00:08:37,851 --> 00:08:39,853 I worked on that presentation for over a year. 180 00:08:39,894 --> 00:08:41,312 - Yeah, well, bosses are dicks. 181 00:08:41,354 --> 00:08:43,189 That's why I'm self-employed. 182 00:08:43,231 --> 00:08:44,399 - Self-employed doing what? 183 00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,152 - Doin' well enough to afford the new Kobes. 184 00:08:47,193 --> 00:08:48,319 Pow! 185 00:08:48,361 --> 00:08:50,572 You didn't answer the question. 186 00:08:50,613 --> 00:08:52,532 - Because I'm being intentionally vague. 187 00:08:52,574 --> 00:08:54,159 Damn. 188 00:08:54,200 --> 00:08:55,869 Learn to allow a little mystery in your life. 189 00:08:55,910 --> 00:08:58,496 - Maybe I'm looking at this all wrong. 190 00:08:58,538 --> 00:09:00,749 You know what Rita Gaines says? - Who the fuck is Rita Gaines? 191 00:09:00,790 --> 00:09:03,001 - Famous entrepreneur. She was on "Shark Tank." 192 00:09:03,043 --> 00:09:04,294 And she says, 193 00:09:04,336 --> 00:09:07,547 "Every red light turns green eventually." 194 00:09:10,550 --> 00:09:11,843 - That's dumb as shit. 195 00:09:11,885 --> 00:09:13,428 Look, I'm saying this as your brother. 196 00:09:13,470 --> 00:09:15,347 This is your life, Cregory. 197 00:09:15,388 --> 00:09:17,932 You gotta take action. - What kind of action? 198 00:09:17,974 --> 00:09:19,351 - As soon as this lunch is over, 199 00:09:19,392 --> 00:09:20,935 I want you to walk into that guy's office, 200 00:09:20,977 --> 00:09:22,854 shut the door, and don't leave 201 00:09:22,896 --> 00:09:24,522 until he agrees to listen to your pitch-- 202 00:09:24,564 --> 00:09:26,441 the entire pitch. 203 00:09:26,483 --> 00:09:29,027 - Fuck it. You're right. - Goddamn right, I'm right! 204 00:09:29,069 --> 00:09:30,445 - I've worked there over six years. 205 00:09:30,487 --> 00:09:32,030 - Six fucking years. - They can give me ten minutes. 206 00:09:32,072 --> 00:09:33,990 - He can give you 20. - He cangive me 20. 207 00:09:34,032 --> 00:09:35,408 20 grand. - 20 grand! 208 00:09:35,450 --> 00:09:36,701 That's what the fuck 209 00:09:36,743 --> 00:09:39,537 I'm talkin' bout, Cre-gor-y! 210 00:09:44,876 --> 00:09:46,419 - What's up? Do we have a-- 211 00:09:46,461 --> 00:09:49,047 - Mr. Franks, I need $20,000 for a down payment 212 00:09:49,089 --> 00:09:51,758 on a piece of swampland, where I'm gonna grow 213 00:09:51,800 --> 00:09:54,678 saw palmetto berries and make a fuck ton of money. 214 00:09:54,719 --> 00:09:55,887 Did you know that most older men 215 00:09:55,929 --> 00:09:57,597 suffer from enlarged prostates? 216 00:09:57,639 --> 00:09:59,724 Well, these berries shrink the prostate, 217 00:09:59,766 --> 00:10:02,769 improve urination, enhance hair growth, 218 00:10:02,811 --> 00:10:04,104 and boost libido. 219 00:10:04,145 --> 00:10:06,648 Pharmaceutical companies are desperate for them, 220 00:10:06,690 --> 00:10:08,775 but they only grow one place in the world: 221 00:10:08,817 --> 00:10:10,068 coastal Flor-- 222 00:10:12,362 --> 00:10:13,655 - Everybody down! 223 00:10:13,697 --> 00:10:15,323 Down on the ground! 224 00:10:15,365 --> 00:10:16,741 We don't need no heroes. 225 00:10:16,783 --> 00:10:18,284 I don't wanna put no bullets in the body. 226 00:10:18,326 --> 00:10:20,245 Nobody move, nobody gets hu-- 227 00:10:21,579 --> 00:10:22,747 I'm okay. 228 00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:23,998 Go and hit the alarm. 229 00:10:24,040 --> 00:10:25,041 But he's out there. 230 00:10:25,083 --> 00:10:26,334 - So what are you doing in here? 231 00:10:26,376 --> 00:10:27,919 - I was--my pitch! 232 00:10:27,961 --> 00:10:30,422 Your gun's not even out. 233 00:10:30,463 --> 00:10:32,590 - Oh, shit, I forgot I had it. - All right! 234 00:10:32,632 --> 00:10:34,509 You know what time it is. Give me that gun. 235 00:10:34,551 --> 00:10:35,802 Pass the pistol. 236 00:10:37,470 --> 00:10:39,097 - Son of a bitch. 237 00:10:43,643 --> 00:10:46,396 What? 238 00:10:46,438 --> 00:10:48,606 I have no idea what you talkin' about. 239 00:10:48,648 --> 00:10:51,359 Oh, oh, you think all this cash is from a bank robbery. 240 00:10:51,401 --> 00:10:52,485 It's not. 241 00:10:52,527 --> 00:10:54,446 Crazy story... 242 00:10:56,698 --> 00:10:58,700 - I just found it. - You know I got fired, right? 243 00:10:58,742 --> 00:11:00,035 I lost my job 'cause of you! 244 00:11:00,076 --> 00:11:01,411 - No, you lost your job 245 00:11:01,453 --> 00:11:02,787 'cause you weren't where you were supposed to be. 246 00:11:02,829 --> 00:11:04,080 - 'Cause you told me to go in the manager's office 247 00:11:04,122 --> 00:11:05,331 and shut the door. 248 00:11:05,373 --> 00:11:06,416 - That's on you! 249 00:11:06,458 --> 00:11:07,959 You shouldn't be taking advice from me. 250 00:11:08,001 --> 00:11:10,211 I'm a known lowlife. Take me and Dame. 251 00:11:10,253 --> 00:11:12,422 He thinks I should get golden contact lenses, 252 00:11:12,464 --> 00:11:14,966 but I'm ignoring him because that man is trash. 253 00:11:15,008 --> 00:11:16,176 - They make you look like a wizard. 254 00:11:16,217 --> 00:11:17,719 - They make you bump into shit. 255 00:11:17,761 --> 00:11:19,304 - What happened to you, Zay? Huh? 256 00:11:19,346 --> 00:11:20,972 I knew about the scams and the fraud, 257 00:11:21,014 --> 00:11:22,474 but armed robbery? 258 00:11:22,515 --> 00:11:23,975 Seriously? 259 00:11:24,017 --> 00:11:27,228 Dad would be ashamed. 260 00:11:27,270 --> 00:11:29,522 You're a disgrace to his name. 261 00:11:31,107 --> 00:11:32,317 - Hey, Dame, give us a second. 262 00:11:32,359 --> 00:11:33,818 - Oh, yeah, no doubt. No doubt. 263 00:11:33,860 --> 00:11:34,903 No doubt. Shit. 264 00:11:34,944 --> 00:11:36,613 Oh, sh-- 265 00:11:37,906 --> 00:11:40,492 Ow. Fuck. My bad, man. 266 00:11:40,533 --> 00:11:43,912 I--I'll fix that later, you know what I'm sayin'? 267 00:11:43,953 --> 00:11:45,497 Fuck with your periphery and shit. 268 00:11:45,538 --> 00:11:47,499 My bad, man. 269 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:48,708 - That dude's a fool. 270 00:11:48,750 --> 00:11:50,377 You see him fall off the counter in the bank? 271 00:11:51,628 --> 00:11:54,089 So I need a new partner. You're unemployed. 272 00:11:54,130 --> 00:11:55,382 - That's what you wanted to talk about? 273 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:56,883 - Yeah, why you think I sent Dame out the room? 274 00:11:56,925 --> 00:11:58,009 - Because I touched a nerve 275 00:11:58,051 --> 00:11:59,219 with the stuff I said about Dad? 276 00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:01,179 - Oh. No, no. No, no. 277 00:12:01,221 --> 00:12:02,764 That didn't affect me at all. 278 00:12:02,806 --> 00:12:05,308 'Cause you know who was a disgrace to Dad's name? 279 00:12:05,350 --> 00:12:06,518 Dad. 280 00:12:06,559 --> 00:12:09,020 He achieved nothing. He ain't own nothing. 281 00:12:09,062 --> 00:12:11,356 He died with nothing. 282 00:12:11,398 --> 00:12:13,983 But I did you dirty. Here's 20 grand. 283 00:12:14,025 --> 00:12:16,361 Go buy yourself some swampland. Grow your damn dick berries. 284 00:12:16,403 --> 00:12:17,654 - Keep it. 285 00:12:17,696 --> 00:12:21,032 I'll get my loan, and I'll do it the right way. 286 00:12:21,074 --> 00:12:23,952 All right, Rita. Let's go. 287 00:12:23,993 --> 00:12:26,037 Power and glory. 288 00:12:26,079 --> 00:12:28,164 It's 4:00 a.m. and Miami is asleep. 289 00:12:28,206 --> 00:12:29,874 But me? I'm wide awake. 290 00:12:29,916 --> 00:12:31,876 Why? Am I out at the clubs? 291 00:12:31,918 --> 00:12:33,628 Do I rise with the European markets? 292 00:12:33,670 --> 00:12:35,797 No. I just really have to pee. 293 00:12:35,839 --> 00:12:37,424 This is an all-too-familiar story 294 00:12:37,465 --> 00:12:40,635 for a man of 40, 50, or even 60. 295 00:12:40,677 --> 00:12:43,722 You're suffering from benign prostatic hyperplasia. 296 00:12:43,763 --> 00:12:45,015 In other words, 297 00:12:45,056 --> 00:12:46,975 you have an enlarged prostate, sir. 298 00:12:48,977 --> 00:12:51,438 - What's your favorite Jamie Foxx movie? 299 00:12:51,479 --> 00:12:52,689 - E-excuse me? 300 00:12:52,731 --> 00:12:54,566 - My favorite of his, definitely "Collateral." 301 00:12:54,607 --> 00:12:56,943 - You know what he's great in? The new "Annie." 302 00:12:56,985 --> 00:12:58,695 - "Django" is fucking rad. 303 00:12:58,737 --> 00:13:01,322 They should teach that shit in schools. 304 00:13:02,657 --> 00:13:04,576 Bathroom is here. Towels are clean. 305 00:13:04,617 --> 00:13:05,827 What else? 306 00:13:05,869 --> 00:13:08,830 Uh, don't tell anyone I'm renting my place. 307 00:13:08,872 --> 00:13:10,415 It's not really allowed. 308 00:13:10,457 --> 00:13:12,417 - Oh. Just here visiting family. 309 00:13:12,459 --> 00:13:14,085 I don't even think I'll be around much. 310 00:13:14,127 --> 00:13:15,545 - Okay, cool. 311 00:13:15,587 --> 00:13:19,174 Well, I gotta get to the airport. 312 00:13:19,215 --> 00:13:20,925 I'm going to New York for a business meeting. 313 00:13:20,967 --> 00:13:22,218 - Right on, man. Enjoy the Big Apple. 314 00:13:22,260 --> 00:13:23,595 - All right. - All right. 315 00:14:08,223 --> 00:14:09,933 What the hell? 316 00:14:09,974 --> 00:14:11,142 Hey! 317 00:14:11,184 --> 00:14:12,560 Hey, what y'all doin' here? 318 00:14:16,272 --> 00:14:19,984 - Uh, yeah, I remember. 319 00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,070 Why do you think I'm at the car already? 320 00:14:23,363 --> 00:14:25,073 - Pfft. Am I living in here? 321 00:14:25,115 --> 00:14:27,325 What, a man can't cook breakfast in his own car 322 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,035 without living in it? 323 00:14:30,954 --> 00:14:32,622 I have a friend in town. 324 00:14:32,664 --> 00:14:34,124 I gave him my bed. Damn. 325 00:14:34,165 --> 00:14:36,418 Oh, shoot! Phone call. 326 00:14:36,459 --> 00:14:38,086 Gotta cut this conversation short. 327 00:14:38,128 --> 00:14:40,922 I will take Vanessa to school, though. 328 00:14:40,964 --> 00:14:42,340 Oh, shit, it's a loan officer. 329 00:14:42,382 --> 00:14:44,509 Foster Group. Craig Foster speaking. 330 00:14:44,551 --> 00:14:45,969 - Hi, my name is Donald Assarian. 331 00:14:46,011 --> 00:14:47,387 I'm from First Florida Federated. 332 00:14:47,429 --> 00:14:49,014 - Hello, Mr. Assarian. How can I help you? 333 00:14:49,055 --> 00:14:51,808 - I came across your application on my boss' desk. 334 00:14:51,850 --> 00:14:54,019 He wasn't interested because you're-- 335 00:14:54,060 --> 00:14:55,395 well, the point is, 336 00:14:55,437 --> 00:14:56,771 I think it's an interesting proposal. 337 00:14:56,813 --> 00:14:58,398 Any chance you could take me by 338 00:14:58,440 --> 00:14:59,649 to see the plot you're looking at? 339 00:14:59,691 --> 00:15:01,317 - Absolutely. What's a good time for you? 340 00:15:01,359 --> 00:15:02,944 - Could you meet me there in an hour? 341 00:15:02,986 --> 00:15:05,071 - Perfect. Yes, I'll see you there. 342 00:15:05,113 --> 00:15:06,865 Thank you so much, Mr. Assarian. 343 00:15:06,906 --> 00:15:07,949 - Are you getting the loan? 344 00:15:07,991 --> 00:15:10,410 I'm getting the loan! 345 00:15:10,452 --> 00:15:11,578 Well, it's not for sure yet. 346 00:15:11,619 --> 00:15:13,288 He's gotta see the property first. 347 00:15:13,329 --> 00:15:14,539 Oh. My suit. 348 00:15:14,581 --> 00:15:16,041 I gotta get my special suit. 349 00:15:16,082 --> 00:15:17,500 Yo, sorry I can't take Vanessa. 350 00:15:18,585 --> 00:15:19,544 - I know. 351 00:15:20,378 --> 00:15:21,796 - I know. I know. I know. 352 00:15:21,838 --> 00:15:23,757 But this is the moment my life has been building up to. 353 00:15:23,798 --> 00:15:25,008 It's my dream. 354 00:15:25,050 --> 00:15:27,385 And it's the only way I can make it happen. 355 00:15:31,765 --> 00:15:33,391 - I wanted to help grieving families 356 00:15:33,433 --> 00:15:35,518 cover the myriad costs of burying a pet. 357 00:15:37,854 --> 00:15:39,064 - That was a good idea. 358 00:15:39,105 --> 00:15:40,774 Until everybody got smartphones. 359 00:15:40,815 --> 00:15:41,941 It's all the same! 360 00:15:41,983 --> 00:15:44,194 It's one dream. It's one fucking dream. 361 00:15:47,739 --> 00:15:49,699 I'm sorry. 362 00:15:49,741 --> 00:15:52,202 But I really think this is the one. 363 00:15:55,622 --> 00:15:58,416 Also, since you followed me in here, 364 00:15:58,458 --> 00:15:59,834 I do not have a friend over. 365 00:15:59,876 --> 00:16:01,211 That was obviously a lie. 366 00:16:01,252 --> 00:16:02,420 I'm making some extra money 367 00:16:02,462 --> 00:16:03,838 by renting my apartment out to strangers. 368 00:16:07,634 --> 00:16:10,095 - I never, ever do this when Vanessa's here, okay? 369 00:16:10,136 --> 00:16:11,888 I swear to you, Camille. 370 00:16:11,930 --> 00:16:14,766 Also, this guy is cool. I'm a great judge of character. 371 00:16:14,808 --> 00:16:16,267 I'm not just gonna let anybody up in-- 372 00:16:16,309 --> 00:16:18,019 What the fuck? 373 00:16:18,061 --> 00:16:19,729 What the fuck? 374 00:16:19,771 --> 00:16:20,689 - The fuck? 375 00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:29,364 - I know. 376 00:16:30,824 --> 00:16:31,825 - I know. 377 00:16:34,703 --> 00:16:36,287 - Hey. 378 00:16:36,329 --> 00:16:38,039 I'm sorry. 379 00:16:38,081 --> 00:16:40,291 I'm embarrassed. 380 00:16:40,333 --> 00:16:42,460 I'm sorry. 381 00:16:42,502 --> 00:16:44,045 But everything's gonna be different after today. 382 00:16:44,087 --> 00:16:45,296 I'ma get this loan. 383 00:16:45,338 --> 00:16:47,215 It's all gonna be different. I promise. 384 00:16:47,257 --> 00:16:49,175 But right now, I gotta go. Okay? 385 00:16:49,217 --> 00:16:50,969 I can't miss this. This-- 386 00:16:51,011 --> 00:16:52,303 shit! 387 00:16:52,345 --> 00:16:54,305 My sausages! 388 00:16:54,347 --> 00:16:56,141 - I called the fire department. 389 00:16:56,182 --> 00:16:59,019 - Good, good. That was smart. 390 00:16:59,060 --> 00:17:01,438 So can you take me... 391 00:17:06,192 --> 00:17:07,360 Right, let's go. 392 00:17:07,402 --> 00:17:10,655 Uber, yeah. That's a good idea. 393 00:17:10,697 --> 00:17:12,282 Ah, come on. Come on. Come on. 394 00:17:12,323 --> 00:17:14,659 Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on. 395 00:17:14,701 --> 00:17:17,829 Jillian G. Mercedes Benz. 396 00:17:29,883 --> 00:17:31,760 - Craig? 397 00:17:31,801 --> 00:17:34,012 - Yeah. - Hey. I'm Jillian. 398 00:17:34,054 --> 00:17:36,181 This is my Mercedes! 399 00:17:46,191 --> 00:17:47,359 You don't have to worry. 400 00:17:47,400 --> 00:17:49,027 I'm not one of those weird Uber drivers 401 00:17:49,069 --> 00:17:50,153 that doesn't talk. 402 00:17:50,195 --> 00:17:51,780 - Kay. 403 00:17:54,157 --> 00:17:56,242 - Are you from around here? 404 00:17:56,284 --> 00:17:58,411 - Yes. - I'm from Australia. 405 00:18:00,705 --> 00:18:03,416 Have you ever seen the movie "Grease"? 406 00:18:05,710 --> 00:18:06,836 - Yeah. 407 00:18:06,878 --> 00:18:08,797 - Well, here's a little secret for you. 408 00:18:08,838 --> 00:18:12,258 Olivia Newton-John is from Australia. 409 00:18:13,843 --> 00:18:14,886 Sandy? 410 00:18:17,222 --> 00:18:18,306 She played Sandy. 411 00:18:18,348 --> 00:18:19,391 - Yeah, yeah. - Yeah. 412 00:18:19,432 --> 00:18:20,684 - I know who you're talking about. 413 00:18:20,725 --> 00:18:22,811 - Have you ever heard of Nicole Kidman? 414 00:18:24,187 --> 00:18:25,522 - Oh, I'm sorry. I gotta take this. 415 00:18:25,563 --> 00:18:27,232 - She's Australian too. 416 00:18:27,273 --> 00:18:28,274 - What? 417 00:18:28,316 --> 00:18:30,694 - No "hello"? I see how it is. 418 00:18:30,735 --> 00:18:32,737 Well, you're about to feel real bad about being a dick 419 00:18:32,779 --> 00:18:34,489 because I'm calling to offer you a job. 420 00:18:34,531 --> 00:18:36,574 - What kind of job? A legal job? 421 00:18:36,616 --> 00:18:37,784 - That's a good question, Cregory. 422 00:18:37,826 --> 00:18:40,286 Let me run it up the ladder to my HR guy. 423 00:18:40,328 --> 00:18:42,080 - Get Dame to do it. 424 00:18:42,122 --> 00:18:43,873 - Nah, he's unavailable. 425 00:18:43,915 --> 00:18:45,542 He had a little mishap on account of those 426 00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:46,751 dumbass wizard lenses. 427 00:18:48,670 --> 00:18:50,505 - Look, man, I'm just trying to do your poor ass a favor. 428 00:18:50,547 --> 00:18:51,881 Just let me know if you're in. - I'm not in. 429 00:18:51,923 --> 00:18:54,300 My poor ass doesn't need any favors. 430 00:18:54,342 --> 00:18:56,386 As it so happens, I'm on my way 431 00:18:56,428 --> 00:18:58,972 to a business meeting right now. 432 00:18:59,014 --> 00:19:01,057 So thank you, 433 00:19:01,099 --> 00:19:02,350 and go fuck yourself. 434 00:19:02,392 --> 00:19:03,935 - Just call me after when it doesn't work out. 435 00:19:03,977 --> 00:19:05,353 - Go fuck yourself. 436 00:19:08,231 --> 00:19:10,150 - You're a businessman. 437 00:19:10,191 --> 00:19:11,860 Very cool. 438 00:19:11,901 --> 00:19:14,571 My father moved here to be a businessman. 439 00:19:14,612 --> 00:19:16,448 And then he died. 440 00:19:16,489 --> 00:19:18,158 - Sorry to hear that. - It's all right. 441 00:19:18,199 --> 00:19:22,829 It was sort of the best age to lose your dad-- 442 00:19:22,871 --> 00:19:25,540 as a teenager. 443 00:19:25,582 --> 00:19:28,251 So what's this big meeting? 444 00:19:28,293 --> 00:19:29,753 I'm trying to buy some land 445 00:19:29,794 --> 00:19:31,588 so I could start a saw palmetto farm. 446 00:19:31,629 --> 00:19:34,215 It's complicated. - Wow. 447 00:19:34,257 --> 00:19:36,468 I wish I was good at business. 448 00:19:36,509 --> 00:19:39,054 I'm way in debt, which is crazy, 449 00:19:39,095 --> 00:19:40,722 because I have so many jobs. 450 00:19:40,764 --> 00:19:43,558 I Uber. I Lyft. I TaskRabbit. 451 00:19:43,600 --> 00:19:46,436 I get paid by creeps online to watch me eat bananas. 452 00:19:46,478 --> 00:19:48,605 I do a little elder care-- oh, shit! 453 00:19:48,646 --> 00:19:50,523 - What? Wh-wh-what? 454 00:19:53,485 --> 00:19:54,944 Sorry, I just have to do one thing real quick. 455 00:19:54,986 --> 00:19:56,321 - No, I have a meeting. - I know. 456 00:19:56,363 --> 00:19:57,447 But this will just take one second. 457 00:19:57,489 --> 00:19:58,573 Please? 458 00:19:58,615 --> 00:19:59,991 - Pretty please? - Fine, fine, fine. 459 00:20:00,033 --> 00:20:01,034 - Great. 460 00:20:02,452 --> 00:20:03,870 - What's the hammer for? 461 00:20:03,912 --> 00:20:06,039 - Hammering. Be right back. 462 00:20:22,013 --> 00:20:24,349 - What the fuck? 463 00:20:32,315 --> 00:20:34,401 Nearly done! Just wrapping up! 464 00:20:34,442 --> 00:20:36,528 Oh, shit! Fuck you! Ah! 465 00:20:36,569 --> 00:20:39,114 - Oh, shit! - Ah! 466 00:20:41,408 --> 00:20:44,035 Fuck, fuck, fuck, fuck! 467 00:20:44,077 --> 00:20:46,162 - Hey, I'm just gonna get another Uber. 468 00:20:46,204 --> 00:20:48,039 - No, no, no. I'm done! 469 00:20:48,081 --> 00:20:49,749 I'm done. 470 00:21:00,593 --> 00:21:02,554 Would you mind sliding down a tad? 471 00:21:02,595 --> 00:21:04,973 I'm gonna need a little room for this guy. 472 00:21:05,015 --> 00:21:07,517 No, no, no, no, no, no! 473 00:21:07,559 --> 00:21:10,729 No! No! No! 474 00:21:15,108 --> 00:21:17,068 - So you're probably wondering about the snake. 475 00:21:17,110 --> 00:21:19,237 - Yeah, I'm wondering about the fucking snake. 476 00:21:19,279 --> 00:21:21,656 That's exactly what I'm wondering about, Jillian G. 477 00:21:21,698 --> 00:21:22,907 - It's all completely above board. 478 00:21:22,949 --> 00:21:25,410 The state of Florida pays me to do this job. 479 00:21:25,452 --> 00:21:26,745 Check it out. I've got a pamphlet. 480 00:21:28,788 --> 00:21:31,249 Ten years ago, there was a trend for people 481 00:21:31,291 --> 00:21:33,209 to get Burmese pythons as pets. 482 00:21:33,251 --> 00:21:34,836 They start out really cute. 483 00:21:34,878 --> 00:21:36,838 - That can't be true. - It is. 484 00:21:36,880 --> 00:21:38,131 But then they got too big, 485 00:21:38,173 --> 00:21:40,133 so everyone drove their snakes out to the swamps 486 00:21:40,175 --> 00:21:42,844 and set them free, but they're not from here, 487 00:21:42,886 --> 00:21:45,513 so nothing eats them, but they eat everything. 488 00:21:45,555 --> 00:21:46,598 Birds... - Okay. 489 00:21:46,639 --> 00:21:47,932 - Alligators... - Damn. 490 00:21:47,974 --> 00:21:49,559 - Even other snakes. - Nasty. 491 00:21:49,601 --> 00:21:51,353 - It's an ecological disaster. 492 00:21:51,394 --> 00:21:53,980 So the state pays removal agents 493 00:21:54,022 --> 00:21:56,941 100 bucks for every dead python we bring in. 494 00:21:56,983 --> 00:21:59,277 It's a quick and easy way to earn some extra cash. 495 00:21:59,319 --> 00:22:00,570 - Didn't seem easy. 496 00:22:00,612 --> 00:22:02,364 - They're not poisonous. They're really slow. 497 00:22:02,405 --> 00:22:03,573 They're like big hot dogs 498 00:22:03,615 --> 00:22:05,784 that can bite you or squeeze you to death. 499 00:22:05,825 --> 00:22:09,287 But also, they can kind of smile. 500 00:22:09,329 --> 00:22:12,499 - You know, this has been very informative and all that, 501 00:22:12,540 --> 00:22:14,167 but you think we--hey! 502 00:22:14,209 --> 00:22:15,627 Hey! It's alive! 503 00:22:15,669 --> 00:22:16,753 You didn't kill it! 504 00:22:16,795 --> 00:22:17,796 Shit! - Okay. 505 00:22:17,837 --> 00:22:18,922 Okay, okay. 506 00:22:18,963 --> 00:22:20,340 Fuck! - Stay calm! Just remember! 507 00:22:20,382 --> 00:22:21,758 It's more scared than you are! 508 00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:23,551 That motherfucker's not scared at all! 509 00:22:23,593 --> 00:22:24,803 - That must be the brain damage. 510 00:22:24,844 --> 00:22:26,471 Sometimes they lose all sense of reason. 511 00:22:26,513 --> 00:22:28,139 Grab its neck! 512 00:22:28,181 --> 00:22:29,432 - That doesn't help. It's all neck! 513 00:22:31,351 --> 00:22:33,395 Shit! Shit! 514 00:22:33,436 --> 00:22:34,688 Get off me! 515 00:22:34,729 --> 00:22:36,106 - Hold on. Hold on. - Get off me! 516 00:22:36,147 --> 00:22:37,399 Ow! - Sorry! 517 00:22:37,440 --> 00:22:38,483 Sorry! 518 00:22:38,525 --> 00:22:39,526 - Ow! - Sorry! 519 00:22:39,567 --> 00:22:42,612 Shit! 520 00:22:42,654 --> 00:22:44,406 Ow, shit! 521 00:22:44,447 --> 00:22:46,241 Watch the road! 522 00:22:46,282 --> 00:22:48,660 The window won't kill it! 523 00:22:48,702 --> 00:22:51,037 Shit! - Oh, shit! 524 00:23:02,382 --> 00:23:06,511 - Okay, so I kind of feel like I owe you an apology. 525 00:23:06,553 --> 00:23:07,762 You were right. 526 00:23:07,804 --> 00:23:09,931 The window thing worked. You killed the snake! 527 00:23:09,973 --> 00:23:12,392 - That's not what you should be apologizing for, Jillian G. 528 00:23:12,434 --> 00:23:14,102 - What do you think I should be sorry about? 529 00:23:14,144 --> 00:23:15,311 - Everything! 530 00:23:15,353 --> 00:23:17,647 The generalities of this whole situation. 531 00:23:17,689 --> 00:23:21,401 - Okay, but the window thing was super smart. 532 00:23:21,443 --> 00:23:24,029 So many people overlook the cerebral aspect 533 00:23:24,070 --> 00:23:25,947 of snake-killing. 534 00:23:25,989 --> 00:23:28,616 Hey, would you ever wanna team up? 535 00:23:28,658 --> 00:23:30,535 Your brains, my hammer? 536 00:23:30,577 --> 00:23:33,038 - I just wanna get to my meeting. 537 00:23:33,079 --> 00:23:34,205 Does your car still drive? 538 00:23:34,247 --> 00:23:35,874 - Oh, yeah, for sure. 539 00:23:35,915 --> 00:23:38,752 I'll just throw it in reverse and get you there in no time. 540 00:23:38,793 --> 00:23:40,462 - My special suit. 541 00:23:40,503 --> 00:23:41,963 I can't show up looking like this. 542 00:23:42,005 --> 00:23:43,256 - Not a problem. 543 00:23:43,298 --> 00:23:45,300 I have clothes you could change into. 544 00:23:48,511 --> 00:23:50,722 - Do you live in there? - Yeah, it's great. 545 00:23:50,764 --> 00:23:52,098 I got a bed. 546 00:23:52,140 --> 00:23:54,392 I got a couple garbage bags with my things. 547 00:23:56,144 --> 00:23:57,103 That's pretty much it. 548 00:23:57,145 --> 00:23:58,438 - Where do you go to the bathroom? 549 00:23:58,480 --> 00:23:59,356 - Starbucks. 550 00:23:59,397 --> 00:24:00,732 It's actually awesome. - It is? 551 00:24:00,774 --> 00:24:02,901 - Does your bathroom get cleaned twice a day? 552 00:24:02,942 --> 00:24:05,195 - Look, this is very nice and more than a little bleak, 553 00:24:05,236 --> 00:24:06,654 but I don't think you have anything in there 554 00:24:06,696 --> 00:24:08,031 that'll fit me. 555 00:24:08,073 --> 00:24:11,326 - Oh, really? 556 00:24:13,203 --> 00:24:15,497 - What the hell is that? - My graduation gown. 557 00:24:15,538 --> 00:24:17,999 Florida School of Excellence, class of '07. 558 00:24:18,041 --> 00:24:19,709 Go Titties! 559 00:24:19,751 --> 00:24:21,127 The old mascot was racist, 560 00:24:21,169 --> 00:24:23,546 so they let the students vote on a new one. 561 00:24:28,009 --> 00:24:30,595 That color does really pop on you. 562 00:24:30,637 --> 00:24:32,639 Quick tip, though-- stay in the shade 563 00:24:32,681 --> 00:24:34,391 because that fabric melts in the sun 564 00:24:34,432 --> 00:24:36,476 and it will burn your skin. 565 00:24:51,866 --> 00:24:54,577 - Mr. Assarian. 566 00:24:54,619 --> 00:24:55,787 I'm Craig. 567 00:24:59,082 --> 00:25:00,250 - What are you wearing? - This? 568 00:25:00,291 --> 00:25:02,210 Oh, it's a, uh... 569 00:25:02,252 --> 00:25:03,503 it's a gown. 570 00:25:03,545 --> 00:25:05,755 Standard business casual gown. 571 00:25:05,797 --> 00:25:07,716 Look, I have a presentation for you, okay? 572 00:25:07,757 --> 00:25:09,050 - Yeah. - Okay. 573 00:25:10,719 --> 00:25:12,012 It's 4:00 a.m. 574 00:25:12,053 --> 00:25:13,680 Miami is asleep. 575 00:25:13,722 --> 00:25:16,975 But I'm wide awake. Why? Am I out at the clubs? 576 00:25:17,017 --> 00:25:18,810 Do I rise with the European markets? 577 00:25:18,852 --> 00:25:20,186 No. 578 00:25:20,228 --> 00:25:21,855 I just really have to pee. 579 00:25:25,400 --> 00:25:27,527 This is a all-too-familiar-story 580 00:25:27,569 --> 00:25:31,406 for a man of over 40, 50, or even 60. 581 00:25:33,533 --> 00:25:35,035 What's the deal? 582 00:25:35,076 --> 00:25:37,287 What's, uh, the deal? 583 00:25:40,915 --> 00:25:42,542 Okay. 584 00:25:42,584 --> 00:25:44,377 Look, I know this seems crazy. 585 00:25:44,419 --> 00:25:47,672 I'm late. I show up in a billboard. 586 00:25:47,714 --> 00:25:50,050 When I was a kid, my dad told me 587 00:25:50,091 --> 00:25:52,927 if I worked hard, I could make it. 588 00:25:52,969 --> 00:25:54,846 I could become rich. 589 00:25:56,348 --> 00:25:57,640 "It won't be easy," he said, 590 00:25:57,682 --> 00:26:02,187 "but you just gotta have faith." 591 00:26:02,228 --> 00:26:04,230 And then he died. 592 00:26:04,272 --> 00:26:08,193 He wasn't rich. He wasn't anything. 593 00:26:08,234 --> 00:26:10,403 But I carried on his dream. 594 00:26:10,445 --> 00:26:12,322 I just thought that, 595 00:26:12,364 --> 00:26:16,368 you know, if I could prove him right, 596 00:26:16,409 --> 00:26:19,079 then his life would've meant something. 597 00:26:19,120 --> 00:26:21,414 His death would've meant something. 598 00:26:21,456 --> 00:26:26,211 And I waited and I worked through setback after setback, 599 00:26:26,252 --> 00:26:28,380 and it's just getting so damn hard. 600 00:26:28,421 --> 00:26:30,632 And I just wanted a sign-- 601 00:26:30,674 --> 00:26:33,635 anything to tell me to keep going. 602 00:26:33,677 --> 00:26:36,721 So when you called this morning out of nowhere, 603 00:26:36,763 --> 00:26:38,807 that's what I'd been waiting for. 604 00:26:38,848 --> 00:26:40,684 It was like the heavens opened up 605 00:26:40,725 --> 00:26:43,103 and I could hear the angels singing. 606 00:26:43,144 --> 00:26:45,772 So now, if you say no, 607 00:26:45,814 --> 00:26:49,901 it's not just that I won't get to start my new business. 608 00:26:49,943 --> 00:26:54,197 This is everything I've ever believed in. 609 00:26:54,239 --> 00:26:56,199 So I'm asking you, 610 00:26:56,241 --> 00:26:58,952 please, 611 00:26:58,993 --> 00:27:00,662 reward my faith. 612 00:27:03,123 --> 00:27:05,709 - Fuck him. That guy's a dick. 613 00:27:10,422 --> 00:27:12,674 Do you mind if we make a quick pit stop? 614 00:27:14,509 --> 00:27:16,678 - I feel like I'm going above and beyond here 615 00:27:16,720 --> 00:27:18,638 in my role as Uber passenger. 616 00:27:18,680 --> 00:27:21,307 - Okay, I didn't wanna ruin the surprise, 617 00:27:21,349 --> 00:27:24,144 but I'm gonna give you the 100 bucks 618 00:27:24,185 --> 00:27:25,687 to invest in your business. 619 00:27:25,729 --> 00:27:27,063 - What? Why? 620 00:27:27,105 --> 00:27:29,441 - Do you know why my graduation gown wasn't melted? 621 00:27:29,482 --> 00:27:30,525 - I assumed because you were 622 00:27:30,567 --> 00:27:31,651 sittin' in the shade or whatever. 623 00:27:31,693 --> 00:27:33,611 There's no shade 624 00:27:33,653 --> 00:27:36,072 at the Florida School of Excellence. 625 00:27:36,114 --> 00:27:39,200 Wake up, man! I didn't graduate. 626 00:27:39,242 --> 00:27:41,828 Remember when I said 16 was a good age 627 00:27:41,870 --> 00:27:43,538 to have your dad die? 628 00:27:43,580 --> 00:27:45,665 It wasn't. I tricked you. 629 00:27:45,707 --> 00:27:48,001 I kind of stopped going to school after that-- 630 00:27:48,043 --> 00:27:50,920 stopped really doing anything. 631 00:27:50,962 --> 00:27:53,340 Things have been tough since then, and I don't know, 632 00:27:53,381 --> 00:27:56,051 I just don't like to see anyone else give up. 633 00:27:56,092 --> 00:27:57,469 - Well, I appreciate it, Jillian G, 634 00:27:57,510 --> 00:27:59,220 but 100 bucks ain't gonna do shit for me. 635 00:27:59,262 --> 00:28:01,681 - It might be 110. They pay by the foot. 636 00:28:01,723 --> 00:28:03,808 So if you pull the skin away from the meat-- 637 00:28:03,850 --> 00:28:05,685 - I need $20,000. 638 00:28:05,727 --> 00:28:09,022 Okay? So keep your money. 639 00:28:09,064 --> 00:28:10,440 I'm done. 640 00:28:12,150 --> 00:28:13,526 - Okay. 641 00:28:13,568 --> 00:28:16,321 Well, I guess I better go find someone else 642 00:28:16,363 --> 00:28:18,073 to help me with this, then. - Yeah. 643 00:28:24,371 --> 00:28:25,497 - Hey. 644 00:28:25,538 --> 00:28:27,123 How'd the big business meeting go? 645 00:28:27,165 --> 00:28:28,667 You swimmin' in dick berries? 646 00:28:28,708 --> 00:28:30,960 - No. Look. 647 00:28:31,002 --> 00:28:34,089 I'm calling to see if you still have that... 648 00:28:34,130 --> 00:28:35,715 job opening available for me. 649 00:28:35,757 --> 00:28:38,385 - The illegal one? The crime I'm doing? 650 00:28:38,426 --> 00:28:39,844 - I thought we were being cagey about this. 651 00:28:39,886 --> 00:28:42,013 - Oh, no, that was before I had a chance 652 00:28:42,055 --> 00:28:44,224 to rub your moral downfall in your face. 653 00:28:44,265 --> 00:28:45,934 - It's not a moral downfall. 654 00:28:45,975 --> 00:28:47,185 - Oh, it is. 655 00:28:47,227 --> 00:28:49,562 We're gonna do such fucked up stuff together. 656 00:28:49,604 --> 00:28:51,981 - Hey, you think you're in my head? 657 00:28:53,942 --> 00:28:57,821 I know what you're doing-- standin' out here. 658 00:28:57,862 --> 00:28:58,947 It ain't gonna work. 659 00:28:58,988 --> 00:29:00,323 - What the fuck are you talkin' about? 660 00:29:00,365 --> 00:29:01,408 - Oh, you think we're gonna be intimidated 661 00:29:01,449 --> 00:29:02,826 'cause you got a 14-footer? 662 00:29:02,867 --> 00:29:04,119 Think that makes you the favorite? 663 00:29:04,160 --> 00:29:05,745 Well, guess what? 664 00:29:05,787 --> 00:29:08,915 My boy and I are gonna eat your fucking ass. 665 00:29:08,957 --> 00:29:10,500 - Dad. 666 00:29:10,542 --> 00:29:13,586 - Yeah, we're gonna be eatin' out on your ass all day long. 667 00:29:13,628 --> 00:29:16,423 - Dad! - What, Corby? 668 00:29:16,464 --> 00:29:17,590 What? 669 00:29:17,632 --> 00:29:19,592 - We're gonna eat his ass? 670 00:29:19,634 --> 00:29:21,052 - Yeah, well, we're gonna-- 671 00:29:21,094 --> 00:29:23,179 we're gonna kick his ass-- you know what I meant, okay? 672 00:29:23,221 --> 00:29:24,556 Boy, I'm havin' a showdown here. 673 00:29:24,597 --> 00:29:26,391 A man's showdown. Don't undermine me. 674 00:29:26,433 --> 00:29:28,351 - Um, sorry, excuse me. 675 00:29:28,393 --> 00:29:31,021 What are you talkin' about? - The contest. 676 00:29:31,062 --> 00:29:32,605 The Florida Python Challenge. 677 00:29:32,647 --> 00:29:34,691 It starts tomorrow. 30 days. 678 00:29:34,733 --> 00:29:36,484 Whoever kills the most snakes gets a grand prize. 679 00:29:36,526 --> 00:29:38,778 - What kind of grand prize? - Cash. 680 00:29:38,820 --> 00:29:39,946 - How much cash? 681 00:29:42,782 --> 00:29:44,534 - $20,000. 682 00:29:48,163 --> 00:29:49,956 - Zay, 683 00:29:49,998 --> 00:29:51,291 I gotta go. 684 00:31:20,714 --> 00:31:22,757 - Not a doctor. - Shh. 47932

Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.