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1
00:00:05,051 --> 00:00:06,843
It's-it's you again.
2
00:00:06,926 --> 00:00:09,010
Okay, here's-here's what...
Here's what happened.
3
00:00:09,093 --> 00:00:11,010
Carrie put on this brown wig
4
00:00:11,093 --> 00:00:12,801
and was running out
into traffic,
5
00:00:12,885 --> 00:00:15,968
and the guy I thought
was the bad guy isn't,
6
00:00:16,051 --> 00:00:18,343
and her boyfriend
is the suicide bomber.
7
00:00:18,427 --> 00:00:20,593
You believe that shit?
8
00:00:20,676 --> 00:00:22,801
- Wrong show, Frank.
- What?
9
00:00:22,885 --> 00:00:24,801
That's Homeland, not Shameless.
10
00:00:27,010 --> 00:00:28,218
Fuck.
11
00:00:28,302 --> 00:00:30,385
Wow.
12
00:00:30,468 --> 00:00:32,260
Don't mix Percocet with beer.
13
00:00:34,343 --> 00:00:36,260
- Who's the new barback?
- That's Santiago.
14
00:00:36,343 --> 00:00:38,143
He's staying with us
until we find his father.
15
00:00:38,177 --> 00:00:40,218
They were gonna go live
with his uncle in Indiana.
16
00:00:40,302 --> 00:00:42,593
How are we gonna find
some random Guatemalan guy
17
00:00:42,676 --> 00:00:44,051
in Gary, Indiana?
18
00:00:44,135 --> 00:00:45,634
"Where to find
19
00:00:45,718 --> 00:00:47,676
illegal immigrants,
Gary, Indiana."
20
00:00:47,759 --> 00:00:49,343
Got a whole list of places.
21
00:00:49,427 --> 00:00:50,801
You find Santiago's uncle?
22
00:00:50,885 --> 00:00:52,926
Yeah. Found him
and then lost him.
23
00:00:53,010 --> 00:00:54,468
Fly, my Mexican friend!
24
00:00:54,551 --> 00:00:57,218
- Guatemalan.
- Guatemalan friend!
25
00:00:57,302 --> 00:00:58,801
Fly!
26
00:00:58,885 --> 00:01:01,260
Liam, your share
of the bills this month $70.
27
00:01:01,343 --> 00:01:03,343
- I'm nine.
- Figure it out.
28
00:01:03,427 --> 00:01:06,135
Carl, your share of the bill
this month is 70 bucks.
29
00:01:06,218 --> 00:01:07,801
Maybe you should get a real job
30
00:01:07,885 --> 00:01:09,236
and stop hanging out
with your girlfriend so much.
31
00:01:09,260 --> 00:01:10,885
Ingrid and I are pregnant.
32
00:01:10,968 --> 00:01:12,509
- Triplets?
- Sextuplets.
33
00:01:12,593 --> 00:01:14,427
And we're hiding
from a North Korean
34
00:01:14,509 --> 00:01:16,843
fertility specialist,
so make room.
35
00:01:16,926 --> 00:01:18,135
We are moving in.
36
00:01:18,218 --> 00:01:19,801
That's hysterical.
37
00:01:19,885 --> 00:01:21,527
Do you really think
we can afford more than one?
38
00:01:21,551 --> 00:01:22,718
You'll get a job.
39
00:01:24,718 --> 00:01:26,427
"Dreams dead? You're our man.
40
00:01:26,509 --> 00:01:28,468
Be the Hobo Loco Man."
Kev, what is this?
41
00:01:28,551 --> 00:01:30,051
They're holding a competition
42
00:01:30,135 --> 00:01:33,468
to choose the Hobo Loco
spokesperson.
43
00:01:33,551 --> 00:01:36,010
The winner gets
a $50,000 contract
44
00:01:36,093 --> 00:01:39,135
to be in a social media
campaign.
45
00:01:39,218 --> 00:01:40,843
This is me.
46
00:01:40,926 --> 00:01:42,885
I'm the Hobo Loco Man.
47
00:01:42,968 --> 00:01:44,885
You smell like a barroom floor.
48
00:01:46,551 --> 00:01:49,468
I don't need anything from you!
49
00:01:49,551 --> 00:01:50,593
She do this a lot?
50
00:01:50,676 --> 00:01:51,885
Yeah.
51
00:01:51,968 --> 00:01:53,718
Well, lately.
52
00:04:06,551 --> 00:04:08,302
Shit.
53
00:04:08,385 --> 00:04:09,593
You open?
54
00:04:12,385 --> 00:04:14,385
Twenty-four hours.
55
00:04:16,051 --> 00:04:17,343
You sit wherever you want.
56
00:04:25,676 --> 00:04:27,634
I'll bring menus to you.
57
00:04:27,718 --> 00:04:28,885
Are you hiring?
58
00:04:30,135 --> 00:04:31,177
What?
59
00:04:31,260 --> 00:04:32,260
I'm a hard worker.
60
00:04:35,509 --> 00:04:36,968
How about this booth
right over here?
61
00:04:45,676 --> 00:04:47,634
Got any more
where this came from?
62
00:04:50,093 --> 00:04:53,676
Couple hours after last call,
but get you some coffee.
63
00:04:53,759 --> 00:04:55,885
So you're just drinking
on the job, then?
64
00:04:57,177 --> 00:04:59,551
Everything okay out here, Fiona?
65
00:05:08,885 --> 00:05:10,593
Let's get out of here.
66
00:05:24,926 --> 00:05:26,010
Shit.
67
00:05:29,676 --> 00:05:31,676
Shit. Shit.
68
00:05:31,759 --> 00:05:33,302
Shit.
69
00:05:33,385 --> 00:05:34,385
You all right?
70
00:05:36,634 --> 00:05:37,843
Yeah.
71
00:05:39,718 --> 00:05:41,093
Good.
72
00:05:59,634 --> 00:06:01,343
Nothing but junk mail.
73
00:06:03,177 --> 00:06:05,177
Rat shit in the attic.
74
00:06:05,260 --> 00:06:06,676
Fires in the dryer vent.
75
00:06:06,759 --> 00:06:08,551
These ads are terrifying.
76
00:06:08,634 --> 00:06:10,759
Carbon monoxide leaks
from the furnace?
77
00:06:10,843 --> 00:06:12,385
Fiona always handled this shit.
78
00:06:12,468 --> 00:06:14,343
Should I be worried
about these things?
79
00:06:14,427 --> 00:06:16,676
Homeowner stuff.
80
00:06:16,759 --> 00:06:18,885
Sucks to be an adult.
81
00:06:26,551 --> 00:06:29,135
What? I'm eating for seven now.
82
00:06:29,218 --> 00:06:30,858
Well, then all seven of you
are gonna need
83
00:06:30,885 --> 00:06:32,765
to cough up cash
if you're gonna be living here.
84
00:06:32,843 --> 00:06:34,010
All right.
85
00:06:34,093 --> 00:06:35,413
I'm gonna do
some therapy sessions
86
00:06:35,468 --> 00:06:36,926
on the phone this afternoon.
87
00:06:37,010 --> 00:06:38,843
I'll write you a check later.
88
00:06:40,759 --> 00:06:42,302
Hey. Where you guys going?
89
00:06:42,385 --> 00:06:44,051
Softball camp.
90
00:06:44,135 --> 00:06:46,759
I got a call from one of those
20 jobs I applied for.
91
00:06:46,843 --> 00:06:48,385
Nice. Which one?
92
00:06:48,468 --> 00:06:49,926
Some seafood restaurant place.
93
00:06:50,010 --> 00:06:52,468
Carl Gallagher's going legit.
94
00:06:52,551 --> 00:06:53,759
Minimum wage?
95
00:06:53,843 --> 00:06:55,468
Only job someone like me
can get.
96
00:06:55,551 --> 00:06:57,111
You know, you really
can't put "drug dealer"
97
00:06:57,135 --> 00:06:58,634
or "gunrunner"
on your West Point app.
98
00:06:58,718 --> 00:07:00,801
Come on, babe.
99
00:07:00,885 --> 00:07:02,177
Can we call the plumber guy?
100
00:07:02,260 --> 00:07:04,634
Says he can snake our tub
for ten bucks.
101
00:07:04,718 --> 00:07:06,010
What's wrong with our tub?
102
00:07:06,093 --> 00:07:07,676
It has two inches
of scummy water in it
103
00:07:07,759 --> 00:07:09,551
all the time that doesn't drain.
104
00:07:09,634 --> 00:07:11,302
Good morning, family one.
105
00:07:11,385 --> 00:07:13,051
Family two.
106
00:07:13,135 --> 00:07:14,676
Why do you look
like a farm animal?
107
00:07:14,759 --> 00:07:16,093
Smell like one too.
108
00:07:16,177 --> 00:07:19,010
Your father is gonna be
the new Hobo Loco
109
00:07:19,093 --> 00:07:21,177
beverage spokesperson.
110
00:07:21,260 --> 00:07:24,051
Now, I haven't won
the competition yet, Ingy.
111
00:07:24,509 --> 00:07:26,260
Hobo what-o?
112
00:07:26,343 --> 00:07:28,593
It's a delicious
alcoholic beverage.
113
00:07:28,676 --> 00:07:30,177
They're looking for someone
114
00:07:30,260 --> 00:07:31,759
with no purpose in life.
115
00:07:31,843 --> 00:07:34,093
I finally found my calling.
116
00:07:34,177 --> 00:07:37,718
Soon I'll be able
to support those I love.
117
00:07:38,468 --> 00:07:39,801
Yeah.
118
00:07:43,177 --> 00:07:44,759
Wish me luck.
119
00:07:44,843 --> 00:07:48,634
You go get 'em,
my Hobo Loco tiger.
120
00:07:48,718 --> 00:07:51,177
Good-bye, little Frank-ettes.
121
00:07:57,343 --> 00:07:59,260
No need to even hold
a competition.
122
00:07:59,343 --> 00:08:00,759
If it involves alcohol,
123
00:08:00,843 --> 00:08:02,260
they should just
give him the prize.
124
00:08:03,718 --> 00:08:06,177
Think we need to worry
about termites?
125
00:08:10,926 --> 00:08:12,551
The hell's going on?
126
00:08:12,634 --> 00:08:14,385
Jesus, it's almost 730.
127
00:08:14,468 --> 00:08:16,135
Place is closed.
128
00:08:16,218 --> 00:08:18,093
W-well, where's Fiona?
129
00:08:18,177 --> 00:08:19,968
We already turned away
a bunch of customers.
130
00:08:20,051 --> 00:08:21,385
Well, let's get set up fast
131
00:08:21,468 --> 00:08:23,177
so we don't lose
any more business.
132
00:08:24,177 --> 00:08:25,319
Okay, let's get
the coffee going.
133
00:08:25,343 --> 00:08:26,718
Fire up the grills.
134
00:08:26,801 --> 00:08:27,634
Make sure the ketchups
are married.
135
00:08:27,718 --> 00:08:28,843
I'll get the blinds.
136
00:08:30,718 --> 00:08:31,735
All right, set the tables.
137
00:08:31,759 --> 00:08:33,218
Let's go, guys. Come on.
138
00:08:38,593 --> 00:08:40,218
Hey, Eliza.
139
00:08:43,509 --> 00:08:45,427
She alive?
140
00:08:45,509 --> 00:08:47,093
Yo, wakey-wakey!
141
00:08:47,177 --> 00:08:48,610
- Get the fuck away from me!
- Whoa, whoa!
142
00:08:48,634 --> 00:08:49,676
Take it easy!
143
00:08:49,759 --> 00:08:51,676
Shit.
144
00:08:51,759 --> 00:08:53,135
Sorry.
145
00:08:53,218 --> 00:08:54,759
You okay?
146
00:08:54,843 --> 00:08:57,302
Yeah. What time is it?
147
00:08:57,385 --> 00:08:59,051
Why was this place locked?
148
00:09:03,801 --> 00:09:06,343
I was doing the cash out late,
149
00:09:06,427 --> 00:09:08,218
and I, went into the back office
150
00:09:08,302 --> 00:09:10,302
for a second, and these...
151
00:09:10,385 --> 00:09:12,634
three sketchy guys
just came out of nowhere,
152
00:09:12,718 --> 00:09:14,135
and I thought they were
gonna rob me
153
00:09:14,218 --> 00:09:16,051
or... I don't know what.
154
00:09:16,135 --> 00:09:18,343
My God. Are you okay?
155
00:09:18,427 --> 00:09:19,801
I-I locked up. I didn't know
156
00:09:19,885 --> 00:09:21,260
if they were still
hanging around,
157
00:09:21,343 --> 00:09:22,777
and I didn't want to go home
or take the L that late
158
00:09:22,801 --> 00:09:24,343
in case they tried to follow me.
159
00:09:26,051 --> 00:09:28,843
You left the cash out when
you went in the back office?
160
00:09:30,385 --> 00:09:31,427
Yeah, it's fine.
161
00:09:35,135 --> 00:09:36,343
All right.
162
00:09:36,427 --> 00:09:39,177
Um, I'm gonna go
and take a shower,
163
00:09:39,260 --> 00:09:42,718
and, I will be back
for the lunch shift,
164
00:09:42,801 --> 00:09:44,593
and it won't happen again.
165
00:09:49,843 --> 00:09:51,551
See? Shampoo.
166
00:09:51,634 --> 00:09:53,718
Not dish liquid.
167
00:09:53,801 --> 00:09:55,343
That's an interesting concept.
168
00:09:55,468 --> 00:09:56,551
Here, let me show you.
169
00:09:58,135 --> 00:09:59,593
All right.
170
00:10:04,051 --> 00:10:06,968
Man. Yeah, that...
171
00:10:07,051 --> 00:10:08,843
that actually feels really good.
172
00:10:08,926 --> 00:10:10,801
I give great head?
173
00:10:10,885 --> 00:10:12,361
Yeah, it's better
than your regular head.
174
00:10:12,385 --> 00:10:13,593
- Hey!
- Knock, knock, knock!
175
00:10:13,676 --> 00:10:15,135
- Just me.
- Jesus, dude!
176
00:10:15,218 --> 00:10:16,361
And I'm not looking
at your dick.
177
00:10:16,385 --> 00:10:17,444
I just left my retainer in here.
178
00:10:17,468 --> 00:10:18,885
Ew!
179
00:10:18,968 --> 00:10:20,427
I lied.
I looked at your dick. Bye!
180
00:10:20,509 --> 00:10:22,027
Hey, your stupid boyfriend
still owes me $300
181
00:10:22,051 --> 00:10:24,135
for the Comcast bill!
182
00:10:26,010 --> 00:10:28,010
You gotta lose those guys.
183
00:10:28,093 --> 00:10:29,278
Yeah, then I gotta go
through the bullshit
184
00:10:29,302 --> 00:10:31,051
of getting a new roommate.
185
00:10:31,135 --> 00:10:33,218
Okay, turn around. Your turn.
186
00:10:34,218 --> 00:10:36,509
- All right.
- Are you off today?
187
00:10:36,593 --> 00:10:37,968
Yeah.
188
00:10:38,051 --> 00:10:39,427
Me too.
189
00:10:40,634 --> 00:10:42,385
We should do something.
190
00:10:42,468 --> 00:10:44,427
Why? You're not
hanging around with Boone?
191
00:10:44,509 --> 00:10:46,718
No, he's on his way
back to Yemen.
192
00:10:46,801 --> 00:10:48,551
Isn't that where
all those land mines are?
193
00:10:48,634 --> 00:10:50,260
Fingers crossed.
194
00:10:50,343 --> 00:10:52,593
So let's hang out.
Never done that before.
195
00:10:52,676 --> 00:10:55,010
We could see if we even
like each other.
196
00:10:55,093 --> 00:10:56,968
I got boring shit to do all day.
197
00:10:57,051 --> 00:10:59,593
Me too. We can do it together.
198
00:10:59,676 --> 00:11:02,634
Aah! Turn around.
199
00:11:02,718 --> 00:11:04,385
- Take a look.
- Nice.
200
00:11:04,468 --> 00:11:05,926
- It's good.
- Yeah, I like it.
201
00:11:06,010 --> 00:11:07,194
Right, you see,
I give good head too.
202
00:11:07,218 --> 00:11:10,260
What is this?
203
00:11:11,135 --> 00:11:14,551
Diablas! Las diablas!
204
00:11:14,634 --> 00:11:16,051
Santiago.
205
00:11:16,135 --> 00:11:18,051
He probably had
a nightmare again.
206
00:11:19,718 --> 00:11:20,843
Die! Die!
207
00:11:20,926 --> 00:11:23,634
Speaking Spanish.
208
00:11:23,718 --> 00:11:25,676
Girls! Whoa, whoa, whoa.
209
00:11:25,759 --> 00:11:28,718
- Stop. What are you doing?
- Hey! You're hurting him!
210
00:11:28,801 --> 00:11:30,843
- You duct taped him?
- And handcuffs?
211
00:11:30,926 --> 00:11:32,427
Santiago, I am so sorry.
212
00:11:32,509 --> 00:11:34,135
You have to forgive them.
213
00:11:34,218 --> 00:11:36,135
The-the girls
are a little bit wild.
214
00:11:36,218 --> 00:11:38,676
Preschool was supposed
to be taming them.
215
00:11:38,759 --> 00:11:41,051
Come on, baby.
Let's go get you some juice.
216
00:11:42,302 --> 00:11:45,051
Girls, what has gotten into you?
217
00:11:45,135 --> 00:11:47,509
- We don't hurt people.
- We don't?
218
00:11:47,593 --> 00:11:49,759
No, of course not.
We have to be nice,
219
00:11:49,843 --> 00:11:51,593
and Santiago's
part of our family.
220
00:11:51,676 --> 00:11:53,885
- No.
- Yes, honey,
221
00:11:53,968 --> 00:11:55,718
and his sister's
gonna be here soon too.
222
00:11:55,801 --> 00:11:57,926
No, they go home.
223
00:11:58,010 --> 00:11:59,926
They don't have a home.
224
00:12:00,010 --> 00:12:02,343
Bad people wanted
to turn them into sex slaves
225
00:12:02,427 --> 00:12:03,509
and gang members.
226
00:12:03,593 --> 00:12:05,093
Kev, please stop talking.
227
00:12:05,177 --> 00:12:06,509
I'm trying to teach them. I'm...
228
00:12:06,593 --> 00:12:08,113
They're four years old.
Come on, girls.
229
00:12:08,177 --> 00:12:09,194
It's time to get dressed
for school.
230
00:12:09,218 --> 00:12:10,718
Take Santiago to the bar.
231
00:12:13,385 --> 00:12:14,634
Santiago.
232
00:12:14,718 --> 00:12:16,509
What do you say?
233
00:12:16,593 --> 00:12:18,513
Me and you having some
quality dad time together?
234
00:12:18,593 --> 00:12:19,885
Let's do it!
235
00:12:19,968 --> 00:12:21,468
No, no.
236
00:12:21,551 --> 00:12:23,218
God, I'm so sorry.
237
00:12:26,177 --> 00:12:27,343
Yeah, just hold up the shirt.
238
00:12:27,427 --> 00:12:29,718
Nice!
239
00:12:29,801 --> 00:12:33,177
Hey, Hobo Loco is trending
in the top 50 right now.
240
00:12:33,260 --> 00:12:34,777
Thought we'd have, like,
30 homeless here
241
00:12:34,801 --> 00:12:35,718
and that'd be it.
242
00:12:35,801 --> 00:12:38,551
Hey, everyone!
243
00:12:38,634 --> 00:12:40,759
Let me all hear you say,
244
00:12:40,843 --> 00:12:43,010
"I love Hobo Loco!"
245
00:12:43,093 --> 00:12:46,010
I love Hobo Loco!
246
00:12:51,843 --> 00:12:53,509
Are you fucking kidding me?
247
00:12:53,593 --> 00:12:55,135
Who are all these people?
248
00:12:55,218 --> 00:12:57,218
Jesus.
249
00:12:57,302 --> 00:13:01,551
Hey, is everybody here
for the Hobo Loco competition?
250
00:13:01,634 --> 00:13:04,051
Apparently so,
but I'm gonna win this thing.
251
00:13:05,343 --> 00:13:08,135
Gonna be hard,
since I'm a shoo-in.
252
00:13:08,218 --> 00:13:09,843
That right?
253
00:13:09,926 --> 00:13:12,801
I've never held the same job
for more than 37 days.
254
00:13:12,885 --> 00:13:15,343
I spent my life savings
on a Blockbuster franchise
255
00:13:15,427 --> 00:13:16,968
in 2013.
256
00:13:18,343 --> 00:13:21,385
I buried a bipolar wife,
a cancer-riddled girlfriend,
257
00:13:21,468 --> 00:13:23,385
and a mother who never loved me.
258
00:13:23,468 --> 00:13:25,385
Two-thirds of my penis
got blown off
259
00:13:25,468 --> 00:13:27,385
in the First Gulf War.
260
00:13:27,468 --> 00:13:29,926
I won the lottery in 2006
261
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:31,801
and accidentally used
the winning ticket
262
00:13:31,885 --> 00:13:33,718
as a rolling paper.
263
00:13:33,801 --> 00:13:36,010
I grew up in Flint, Michigan.
264
00:13:40,634 --> 00:13:41,634
Frank Gallagher.
265
00:13:41,718 --> 00:13:43,260
Mikey O'Shea.
266
00:13:44,385 --> 00:13:46,468
Irish?
267
00:13:46,551 --> 00:13:49,718
Well, the dead junkie
whose wallet I acquired was.
268
00:13:49,801 --> 00:13:51,260
Very impressive.
269
00:13:52,551 --> 00:13:53,843
Why do these fucking posers
270
00:13:53,926 --> 00:13:56,177
think they can steal
our thunder?
271
00:13:56,260 --> 00:13:57,843
Because their parents told them
272
00:13:57,926 --> 00:13:59,759
they could be anything
they wanted to be.
273
00:14:02,093 --> 00:14:03,593
Let's teach 'em a lesson.
274
00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:04,676
Let's kick ass.
275
00:14:04,718 --> 00:14:05,885
Excuse us. Excuse us.
276
00:14:05,968 --> 00:14:06,885
- Excuse me!
- Excuse us.
277
00:14:06,968 --> 00:14:08,260
- VIP!
- Coming through.
278
00:14:08,343 --> 00:14:09,652
Coming through. This way.
One second.
279
00:14:09,676 --> 00:14:10,735
Look out. Hey,
hey, hey, hey, hey.
280
00:14:10,759 --> 00:14:12,468
Let the real hobos through!
281
00:14:12,551 --> 00:14:14,260
Don't be rude. Don't be rude.
282
00:14:14,343 --> 00:14:15,485
- Hey, hey, hey, hey!
- Come on, excuse us.
283
00:14:15,509 --> 00:14:17,509
- Hey! Hey, hey, hey.
- Good God.
284
00:14:17,593 --> 00:14:19,468
We're here for the competition.
285
00:14:19,551 --> 00:14:21,634
- Where do we sign?
- They cut the line!
286
00:14:21,718 --> 00:14:23,427
And that's exactly
287
00:14:23,509 --> 00:14:25,051
the kind of spunk
we're looking for.
288
00:14:25,135 --> 00:14:26,444
Do you hear that,
Phi Piggie Piggie?
289
00:14:26,468 --> 00:14:27,885
That's what they're looking for.
290
00:14:27,968 --> 00:14:30,509
Get your spunk-less ass
out of here!
291
00:14:30,593 --> 00:14:32,343
- You should learn.
- Hey, fellas.
292
00:14:32,427 --> 00:14:33,819
I justl just need you
to sign in right here.
293
00:14:33,843 --> 00:14:34,843
Right away.
294
00:14:34,926 --> 00:14:36,010
- Done.
- Again, yeah.
295
00:14:36,093 --> 00:14:37,427
Great.
296
00:14:37,509 --> 00:14:38,819
Okay, next,
I'm gonna need to test
297
00:14:38,843 --> 00:14:40,885
your baseline
blood alcohol content.
298
00:14:40,968 --> 00:14:43,177
Right this way.
299
00:14:43,260 --> 00:14:45,177
Here we are.
300
00:14:53,010 --> 00:14:54,135
Point two-three.
301
00:14:54,218 --> 00:14:55,509
Nice.
302
00:14:56,509 --> 00:14:58,260
Point two-seven.
303
00:14:58,343 --> 00:14:59,843
Whoa.
304
00:14:59,926 --> 00:15:01,218
All in a day's work.
305
00:15:01,302 --> 00:15:03,093
Whoo. Great job.
306
00:15:03,177 --> 00:15:04,676
Okay, now, over here,
307
00:15:04,759 --> 00:15:05,986
you're gonna need
to drink two ounces
308
00:15:06,010 --> 00:15:08,801
of Hobo Loco
in less than 15 seconds,
309
00:15:08,885 --> 00:15:10,468
and please,
no throwing up on me.
310
00:15:10,551 --> 00:15:12,885
Please use the trash can
over here.
311
00:15:12,968 --> 00:15:16,801
Okay, and...
312
00:15:18,135 --> 00:15:20,135
OMG. That was amazing.
313
00:15:20,218 --> 00:15:21,135
It's like drinking water.
314
00:15:21,218 --> 00:15:22,926
More like watered-down water.
315
00:15:23,010 --> 00:15:25,468
Well, have a Hobo Loco hat.
316
00:15:25,551 --> 00:15:26,861
Agency will be announcing
the contestants
317
00:15:26,885 --> 00:15:27,801
in just a bit.
318
00:15:27,885 --> 00:15:28,926
All right, next.
319
00:15:30,759 --> 00:15:32,676
Good luck, J-holes.
320
00:15:32,759 --> 00:15:34,010
You hear that, douchebags?
321
00:15:36,593 --> 00:15:38,385
This is the dining area.
322
00:15:38,468 --> 00:15:40,135
I was really impressed
with your résumé.
323
00:15:40,218 --> 00:15:42,551
- Really?
- Kitchen.
324
00:15:42,634 --> 00:15:44,593
Yeah.
325
00:15:44,676 --> 00:15:46,093
Military man?
326
00:15:47,759 --> 00:15:49,010
Um, okay.
327
00:15:49,093 --> 00:15:51,218
And this is the employee lounge.
328
00:15:51,302 --> 00:15:54,427
Right in here.
329
00:15:54,509 --> 00:15:56,593
Let me know if you need
any help putting it on.
330
00:15:56,676 --> 00:15:57,676
Yeah.
331
00:15:57,759 --> 00:15:58,759
Hey, so what's the job?
332
00:15:58,843 --> 00:16:00,718
Busboy, dishwasher?
333
00:16:00,801 --> 00:16:02,302
Street corner sign spinner.
334
00:16:50,010 --> 00:16:51,843
Hey, Franny.
335
00:16:51,926 --> 00:16:53,427
What is that?
336
00:16:53,509 --> 00:16:56,676
Careful. Here.
337
00:16:56,759 --> 00:16:58,968
Hey.
338
00:17:02,343 --> 00:17:03,509
What's going on in here?
339
00:17:03,593 --> 00:17:06,260
Morning sickness.
340
00:17:06,343 --> 00:17:07,801
Snaking the tub.
341
00:17:07,885 --> 00:17:09,385
I got it.
342
00:17:10,509 --> 00:17:12,135
That's disgusting!
343
00:17:13,509 --> 00:17:15,135
Damn.
344
00:17:15,218 --> 00:17:16,902
I should add "plumber"
to my welding résumé.
345
00:17:16,926 --> 00:17:18,759
All right, may I take
a shower, please?
346
00:17:18,843 --> 00:17:20,926
Yeah.
347
00:17:21,010 --> 00:17:23,968
Hey, do you ever do those things
in the saver special?
348
00:17:24,051 --> 00:17:26,343
Check for carbon monoxide leaks
or clean the dryer vent?
349
00:17:26,427 --> 00:17:28,759
No. Too busy, you know,
350
00:17:28,843 --> 00:17:31,509
raising five kids and Frank.
351
00:17:31,593 --> 00:17:33,218
Well, make it quick in there.
352
00:17:33,302 --> 00:17:34,527
Make sure you clean up
your hair in the drain after.
353
00:17:34,551 --> 00:17:35,801
Yeah, all right.
354
00:17:39,218 --> 00:17:41,302
Debs.
355
00:17:41,385 --> 00:17:43,385
Sorry I snapped at you.
356
00:17:43,468 --> 00:17:44,843
You're doing a good job.
357
00:17:44,926 --> 00:17:46,509
Thanks.
358
00:17:46,593 --> 00:17:47,735
Also, I'm working
the lunch shift later,
359
00:17:47,759 --> 00:17:49,302
so I'll have money
for you today.
360
00:17:49,385 --> 00:17:50,593
Good.
361
00:17:55,676 --> 00:17:58,885
Really helps
my morning sickness.
362
00:18:10,676 --> 00:18:13,843
So should we, like,
hold hands or something?
363
00:18:13,926 --> 00:18:16,385
I don't know.
Your hands get all sweaty?
364
00:18:16,509 --> 00:18:19,093
They will now
that you asked me like that.
365
00:18:19,177 --> 00:18:20,718
Are you a top or bottom?
366
00:18:20,801 --> 00:18:22,177
- Bottom.
- See, me too.
367
00:18:22,260 --> 00:18:23,676
This will never work.
368
00:18:23,759 --> 00:18:25,385
It's all right.
We're here anyway.
369
00:18:26,926 --> 00:18:28,135
A nursing home?
370
00:18:28,218 --> 00:18:30,218
Yeah.
I volunteer here once a month.
371
00:18:30,302 --> 00:18:31,926
Come on, you can help me.
372
00:18:32,010 --> 00:18:33,759
Shit.
373
00:18:33,843 --> 00:18:35,968
Hey, are we gonna
be cleaning bedpans or...
374
00:18:37,427 --> 00:18:39,093
What up, bitches?
375
00:18:39,177 --> 00:18:41,634
Tami, Audrey got
denture cream in my hair.
376
00:18:41,718 --> 00:18:43,051
Aww, let me see that.
377
00:18:43,135 --> 00:18:44,509
I did not do that.
378
00:18:44,593 --> 00:18:46,551
Tomorrow you'll say
you did do it.
379
00:18:46,634 --> 00:18:48,551
Make up your Alzheimer's-y mind.
380
00:18:48,634 --> 00:18:50,968
All right, ladies.
Who's at the bowls first?
381
00:18:51,051 --> 00:18:53,676
I've got an assistant today,
so we can do two at a time.
382
00:18:53,759 --> 00:18:55,676
- Me.
- Me too.
383
00:18:55,759 --> 00:18:57,278
- What are we doing?
- Washing their hair.
384
00:18:57,302 --> 00:18:58,551
We're washing their hair?
385
00:18:58,634 --> 00:19:00,093
Yeah. Watch out for that one.
386
00:19:00,177 --> 00:19:01,319
She's handsy,
likes to grab a dick.
387
00:19:01,343 --> 00:19:03,968
Hey. You all set?
388
00:19:18,135 --> 00:19:19,135
Hey.
389
00:19:19,177 --> 00:19:20,343
Hey. What's up, man?
390
00:19:20,427 --> 00:19:21,759
What are you doing?
391
00:19:21,843 --> 00:19:23,468
Giving Santiago
more of an American look
392
00:19:23,551 --> 00:19:24,843
before we go to The Alibi.
393
00:19:44,051 --> 00:19:45,634
You're getting his sister too?
394
00:19:45,718 --> 00:19:47,343
Yeah. Foster people are gonna be
395
00:19:47,427 --> 00:19:49,260
dropping her off
a little bit later.
396
00:19:49,343 --> 00:19:51,218
There you go.
397
00:19:53,343 --> 00:19:54,718
And the final touch.
398
00:19:57,676 --> 00:20:00,135
Okay.
399
00:20:00,218 --> 00:20:01,968
How's he look?
400
00:20:02,051 --> 00:20:03,177
Like a cheesy American.
401
00:20:03,260 --> 00:20:05,010
Nice.
402
00:20:10,801 --> 00:20:12,843
So you got a lady friend
back home?
403
00:20:12,926 --> 00:20:14,676
Sure do.
404
00:20:14,759 --> 00:20:16,718
Jasmine Dawn.
405
00:20:16,801 --> 00:20:19,051
Except she kicked me out
three years ago.
406
00:20:20,759 --> 00:20:22,718
Strapping young man like you?
407
00:20:22,801 --> 00:20:24,260
Yeah, well, I had
too many blackouts
408
00:20:24,343 --> 00:20:26,468
for her to deal with.
409
00:20:26,551 --> 00:20:28,634
But I become the Hobo Loco Man,
though,
410
00:20:28,718 --> 00:20:30,759
she gotta take me back, right?
411
00:20:30,843 --> 00:20:33,051
As long as she'll settle
for runner-up.
412
00:20:33,135 --> 00:20:34,551
Won't have to.
413
00:20:34,634 --> 00:20:36,843
You got loser
written all over you.
414
00:20:36,926 --> 00:20:39,427
All right, good afternoon!
415
00:20:39,509 --> 00:20:41,427
Yes, welcome.
416
00:20:41,509 --> 00:20:43,843
Thank you for entering
our Hobo Loco Man search...
417
00:20:43,926 --> 00:20:46,468
Or Hobo Loco Woman,
418
00:20:46,551 --> 00:20:48,968
of course. Yes, ladies.
419
00:20:49,051 --> 00:20:50,851
All right, we have reviewed
your applications,
420
00:20:50,885 --> 00:20:52,527
and we're ready to announce
the 20 contestants.
421
00:20:52,551 --> 00:20:54,468
If your name is called,
please come on up
422
00:20:54,551 --> 00:20:56,302
to the Hobo Loco porch.
423
00:20:56,385 --> 00:20:58,551
Bethany Houseman!
424
00:20:58,634 --> 00:21:00,718
- There's Bethany!
- Hey, all right.
425
00:21:00,801 --> 00:21:02,051
Next up, Victor...
426
00:21:02,135 --> 00:21:04,468
"Nag-high."
427
00:21:04,551 --> 00:21:06,177
- Victor! My man.
- Yay!
428
00:21:06,260 --> 00:21:07,509
- All right.
- Next up
429
00:21:07,593 --> 00:21:09,177
Frank Gallagher!
430
00:21:09,260 --> 00:21:11,010
Whoo! Yes! Where is he?
431
00:21:11,093 --> 00:21:12,111
- Hey, there he is.
- That's Frank.
432
00:21:12,135 --> 00:21:13,593
There he is!
433
00:21:13,676 --> 00:21:17,093
All right. Gloria Sweetland.
434
00:21:18,010 --> 00:21:19,634
She's got fans.
435
00:21:21,551 --> 00:21:24,759
Mikey O'Shea!
436
00:21:24,843 --> 00:21:26,010
- Mikey, Mikey, Mikey.
- Yeah.
437
00:21:26,093 --> 00:21:28,427
Yay!
438
00:21:28,509 --> 00:21:30,010
We got a competition now.
439
00:21:30,093 --> 00:21:31,676
- Yeah.
- Hola.
440
00:21:31,759 --> 00:21:34,343
Next up, Mrs. O'Coin.
441
00:21:34,427 --> 00:21:36,302
Right. There she is.
442
00:21:41,593 --> 00:21:43,634
Hey. Hey, hey, hey, hey.
443
00:21:43,718 --> 00:21:46,218
No means no, Audrey, all right?
444
00:21:46,302 --> 00:21:47,551
There you go.
445
00:21:49,343 --> 00:21:50,551
So what boring stuff are you
446
00:21:50,634 --> 00:21:52,468
gonna have me do with you today?
447
00:21:52,551 --> 00:21:55,343
Gotta buy a new phone charger,
448
00:21:55,427 --> 00:21:57,051
some socks,
449
00:21:57,135 --> 00:21:58,968
then go grocery shopping.
450
00:21:59,051 --> 00:22:00,218
Debs has us on rotation.
451
00:22:00,302 --> 00:22:01,885
It's my turn.
452
00:22:01,968 --> 00:22:04,093
I can help you get
some healthy stuff.
453
00:22:04,177 --> 00:22:06,468
Do you know they actually have
produce aisles
454
00:22:06,551 --> 00:22:07,926
at the grocery store?
455
00:22:08,010 --> 00:22:09,968
You don't say.
456
00:22:11,885 --> 00:22:14,759
This feels so good.
457
00:22:14,843 --> 00:22:16,302
It's been a long time
since a boy's
458
00:22:16,385 --> 00:22:18,509
run his fingers through my hair.
459
00:22:20,843 --> 00:22:22,759
Hey, how long
you been volunteering here?
460
00:22:22,843 --> 00:22:24,509
Since beauty school.
461
00:22:24,593 --> 00:22:26,551
My Grandma Peggy
used to live here.
462
00:22:26,634 --> 00:22:28,385
What'd you say?
463
00:22:28,468 --> 00:22:30,551
I wasn't talking to you,
Broom Hilda.
464
00:22:31,385 --> 00:22:33,509
I was telling Lip
about my Grandma Peggy.
465
00:22:33,593 --> 00:22:35,551
The whore?
466
00:22:35,634 --> 00:22:38,343
She fucked your boyfriend
one time. Get over it.
467
00:22:38,427 --> 00:22:40,236
You know, that shit shouldn't
matter once you're past 75.
468
00:22:40,260 --> 00:22:41,718
I will never forget.
469
00:22:41,801 --> 00:22:43,561
Okay, well, that's good.
You hold on to that.
470
00:22:48,968 --> 00:22:51,260
You're smiling at me
in that way.
471
00:22:52,343 --> 00:22:53,593
What way?
472
00:22:53,676 --> 00:22:55,676
That you like me.
473
00:22:55,759 --> 00:22:57,468
Well, it's kind of hard not to
when you're
474
00:22:57,551 --> 00:22:59,093
putting rollers
in some lady's hair
475
00:22:59,177 --> 00:23:00,718
on your day off.
476
00:23:01,718 --> 00:23:03,093
- Whoa.
- Audrey, stop.
477
00:23:03,177 --> 00:23:05,468
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.
- Leave him alone.
478
00:23:05,551 --> 00:23:07,135
That's my dick.
479
00:23:22,843 --> 00:23:24,051
'Sup, small fry?
480
00:23:24,135 --> 00:23:25,634
Saw the sign in the window.
481
00:23:25,718 --> 00:23:27,302
"Help Wanted." I need a job.
482
00:23:27,385 --> 00:23:28,551
How old are you?
483
00:23:28,634 --> 00:23:29,634
Twenty-five.
484
00:23:31,093 --> 00:23:32,801
Yeah, come back when you're 31.
485
00:23:32,885 --> 00:23:34,468
Okay.
486
00:23:37,801 --> 00:23:40,427
What do you do with those
squeezed-out lemons?
487
00:23:40,509 --> 00:23:41,509
Whoo!
488
00:23:48,093 --> 00:23:50,801
Okay, congratulations, hobos.
489
00:23:50,885 --> 00:23:52,027
For the next week,
you'll be sleeping
490
00:23:52,051 --> 00:23:54,177
in this backyard
and be required to drink
491
00:23:54,260 --> 00:23:57,051
16 ounces of Hobo Loco daily.
492
00:23:57,135 --> 00:23:59,218
Each day, you'll be given
timed challenges.
493
00:23:59,302 --> 00:24:01,051
Those of you who fail
to complete the tasks
494
00:24:01,135 --> 00:24:02,926
will be eliminated.
495
00:24:03,010 --> 00:24:05,385
You'll also need
to create brand awareness.
496
00:24:05,468 --> 00:24:08,843
You each get a phone
and two quarts of Hobo Loco.
497
00:24:08,926 --> 00:24:10,759
Take lots of photos and videos
498
00:24:10,843 --> 00:24:13,010
of folks sampling
your Hobo Loco.
499
00:24:13,093 --> 00:24:15,010
All right, who's ready
for the first challenge?
500
00:24:15,093 --> 00:24:17,343
- Yeah!
- Yay.
501
00:24:17,427 --> 00:24:19,759
In the spirit of a true hobo,
each contestant will forage
502
00:24:19,843 --> 00:24:22,385
for their own bedding
to sleep on tonight.
503
00:24:22,468 --> 00:24:23,926
You will be judged
504
00:24:24,010 --> 00:24:26,885
on creativity
and resourcefulness.
505
00:24:26,968 --> 00:24:29,926
You have one hour.
506
00:24:30,010 --> 00:24:32,093
All right, let's go out there,
start hobo-ing!
507
00:24:32,177 --> 00:24:33,468
Okay!
508
00:24:33,551 --> 00:24:35,093
- Frank!
- What are you doing?
509
00:24:35,177 --> 00:24:36,236
- Come on, Frank!
- Get off of me. No!
510
00:24:36,260 --> 00:24:38,051
Wait for me!
511
00:24:38,135 --> 00:24:39,676
Argh, matey.
512
00:24:39,759 --> 00:24:42,051
Popcorn shrimp is back.
513
00:24:43,177 --> 00:24:44,843
Fucking sh...
514
00:24:46,218 --> 00:24:48,509
Aye, aye, matey.
Popcorn shrimp is back.
515
00:24:48,593 --> 00:24:51,468
Hey, butt pirate,
need a soda with your shrimp?
516
00:24:51,551 --> 00:24:52,676
Fuck you, douchebag!
517
00:24:54,385 --> 00:24:56,801
Fuck.
518
00:24:56,885 --> 00:24:58,801
Aye, aye, matey.
519
00:24:58,885 --> 00:25:01,676
Popcorn shrimp. Fuck.
520
00:25:02,968 --> 00:25:04,968
When did we plant grass in here?
521
00:25:05,051 --> 00:25:07,427
- That's mold.
- Fuck.
522
00:25:07,509 --> 00:25:09,509
When'd you guys
suddenly get into cleaning?
523
00:25:09,593 --> 00:25:11,218
Makes Santiago happy.
524
00:25:11,302 --> 00:25:13,010
Yeah, we're doing stuff
he likes.
525
00:25:14,759 --> 00:25:16,468
Hey, Santiago said
526
00:25:16,551 --> 00:25:18,509
your girls are trying
to murder him.
527
00:25:18,593 --> 00:25:20,010
What?
528
00:25:20,093 --> 00:25:21,610
Is that what they were doing
this morning?
529
00:25:21,634 --> 00:25:23,069
Wait, that's what they
were doing this morning?
530
00:25:23,093 --> 00:25:24,551
He called them las diablas...
531
00:25:24,634 --> 00:25:26,509
The devils.
532
00:25:26,593 --> 00:25:27,652
But he's okay with it,
because he doesn't want you
533
00:25:27,676 --> 00:25:28,926
to send him back.
534
00:25:29,010 --> 00:25:30,718
We're not gonna send him back.
535
00:25:30,801 --> 00:25:32,069
Why would the girls
want to murder him?
536
00:25:32,093 --> 00:25:33,676
They're not trying
to murder anyone.
537
00:25:33,759 --> 00:25:35,569
- They're just playing.
- Maybe they're jealous...
538
00:25:35,593 --> 00:25:37,177
Sibling rivalry.
539
00:25:37,260 --> 00:25:38,801
Maybe they're
just not into having
540
00:25:38,885 --> 00:25:40,111
some random brown dude
who doesn't speak English
541
00:25:40,135 --> 00:25:41,135
living in their house.
542
00:25:41,218 --> 00:25:42,093
They're brown too.
543
00:25:42,177 --> 00:25:43,468
Different shade of brown.
544
00:25:43,551 --> 00:25:45,385
That's crazy.
545
00:25:45,468 --> 00:25:47,319
Just as crazy as white people,
who are actually pink,
546
00:25:47,343 --> 00:25:49,069
thinking all black people
are the same color.
547
00:25:49,093 --> 00:25:50,569
Well, what about
brownish white people,
548
00:25:50,593 --> 00:25:52,468
like some Italians
549
00:25:52,551 --> 00:25:54,509
or Portuguese or Spanish?
550
00:25:54,593 --> 00:25:56,177
They can be
as brown as Santiago.
551
00:25:56,260 --> 00:25:58,051
They're European brown.
552
00:25:58,135 --> 00:25:59,610
All right, I'm lost.
What are you talking about?
553
00:25:59,634 --> 00:26:01,051
Okay, it's real simple.
Your girls
554
00:26:01,135 --> 00:26:02,885
are a different brown
than Santiago,
555
00:26:02,968 --> 00:26:04,236
so they want his different brown
556
00:26:04,260 --> 00:26:05,551
to go home where he belongs
557
00:26:05,634 --> 00:26:07,010
and leave their brown to get
558
00:26:07,093 --> 00:26:08,759
all the good stuff from America.
559
00:26:08,843 --> 00:26:10,069
Are you saying our girls
are racist?
560
00:26:10,093 --> 00:26:11,509
He's saying Amy and Gemma
561
00:26:11,593 --> 00:26:13,593
don't understand
what's going on.
562
00:26:13,676 --> 00:26:15,036
What if they want
to murder Martina
563
00:26:15,093 --> 00:26:16,302
when she shows up?
564
00:26:16,385 --> 00:26:17,885
No one's murdering anyone.
565
00:26:17,968 --> 00:26:19,968
- Who's Martina?
- Santiago's sister.
566
00:26:20,051 --> 00:26:21,551
If she's the same color brown
as him,
567
00:26:21,634 --> 00:26:23,010
they're gonna want
to murder her.
568
00:26:23,093 --> 00:26:24,759
Shut up, Tommy.
It'd like Kermit said.
569
00:26:24,843 --> 00:26:26,051
They're just jealous.
570
00:26:26,135 --> 00:26:27,575
We're gonna talk to them
after school
571
00:26:27,634 --> 00:26:28,819
and tell them there's plenty
of good stuff in America
572
00:26:28,843 --> 00:26:30,051
for all the brown people
573
00:26:30,135 --> 00:26:31,236
so they don't have
to end up in jail
574
00:26:31,260 --> 00:26:32,926
for murdering
the different brown people
575
00:26:33,010 --> 00:26:34,210
or something like that, right?
576
00:26:39,218 --> 00:26:40,968
Hey, I recognize you.
577
00:26:41,051 --> 00:26:42,759
You're that crazy lady's
ex-husband.
578
00:26:42,843 --> 00:26:45,385
- Yeah. Is she here?
- Gallaghers don't snitch.
579
00:26:45,468 --> 00:26:47,551
I got a phone app
that says she's in there.
580
00:26:47,634 --> 00:26:49,593
Okay.
581
00:26:49,676 --> 00:26:51,551
Make yourself useful
and get the door.
582
00:26:51,634 --> 00:26:54,135
All right.
583
00:26:54,218 --> 00:26:56,218
There you go.
584
00:26:58,468 --> 00:26:59,926
Cool if I look around?
585
00:27:00,010 --> 00:27:01,260
Knock yourself out.
586
00:27:01,343 --> 00:27:02,634
Might be upstairs.
587
00:27:04,843 --> 00:27:06,051
- Ingrid?
- You fall?
588
00:27:06,135 --> 00:27:07,551
- No.
- Ingrid!
589
00:27:07,634 --> 00:27:09,427
Just making sure
my embryos stay in.
590
00:27:09,509 --> 00:27:10,676
Where are you?
591
00:27:10,759 --> 00:27:12,069
I'm selling lemonade
to make money
592
00:27:12,093 --> 00:27:13,634
so I can sleep indoors again.
593
00:27:13,718 --> 00:27:15,093
Ingrid?
594
00:27:15,177 --> 00:27:15,843
What the hell are you doing?
595
00:27:15,926 --> 00:27:17,509
Vacuuming the lint
596
00:27:17,593 --> 00:27:19,069
out of the dryer vents
before they catch on fire.
597
00:27:19,093 --> 00:27:20,593
Ingrid, where...
598
00:27:20,676 --> 00:27:22,218
Ingrid.
599
00:27:22,302 --> 00:27:24,302
Ingy.
600
00:27:24,385 --> 00:27:25,302
What are you doing here?
601
00:27:25,385 --> 00:27:26,551
Dr. Kwan called me.
602
00:27:26,634 --> 00:27:27,834
She told me you were pregnant.
603
00:27:27,885 --> 00:27:29,218
That's wonderful.
604
00:27:29,302 --> 00:27:31,177
Wonderful?
605
00:27:31,260 --> 00:27:32,885
You never wanted me
to have children
606
00:27:32,968 --> 00:27:34,593
because of my condition.
607
00:27:34,676 --> 00:27:36,260
Well, now that you are pregnant,
608
00:27:36,343 --> 00:27:37,759
it's a beautiful miracle.
609
00:27:37,843 --> 00:27:39,260
Let's do this together.
610
00:27:39,343 --> 00:27:40,468
What?
611
00:27:40,551 --> 00:27:42,135
They're not even yours.
612
00:27:42,218 --> 00:27:43,260
They're Frank's.
613
00:27:44,135 --> 00:27:46,260
Yes, but you just met him.
614
00:27:46,343 --> 00:27:48,278
You think he's really committed
to having more kids?
615
00:27:48,302 --> 00:27:50,385
Yes. Yes.
616
00:27:50,468 --> 00:27:52,278
But I'm the one who's always
been there for you,
617
00:27:52,302 --> 00:27:53,718
and I always will,
618
00:27:53,801 --> 00:27:55,843
so let's get you
back on your meds
619
00:27:55,926 --> 00:27:58,759
and then we'll go
for a checkup with Dr. Kwan.
620
00:27:58,843 --> 00:28:00,509
You're trying to trick me.
621
00:28:00,593 --> 00:28:03,135
You're gonna get me
on that exam table
622
00:28:03,218 --> 00:28:06,010
and then have Kwan just suck
the embryos out of me!
623
00:28:06,093 --> 00:28:08,218
No, I won't. I won't, I promise.
624
00:28:08,302 --> 00:28:10,260
We'll keep two.
We'll have twins.
625
00:28:10,343 --> 00:28:11,527
Wouldn't that be great? Twins?
626
00:28:11,551 --> 00:28:13,718
Bullshit.
627
00:28:13,801 --> 00:28:15,509
You don't want my babies.
628
00:28:15,593 --> 00:28:18,051
Frank does. Frank loves me.
629
00:28:18,135 --> 00:28:21,676
He loves all six of my embryos.
630
00:28:21,759 --> 00:28:24,218
I have a phone patient now,
631
00:28:24,302 --> 00:28:26,385
so please go.
632
00:28:27,885 --> 00:28:30,260
Okay, okay.
633
00:28:32,343 --> 00:28:34,676
I'll check back in later.
634
00:28:40,968 --> 00:28:42,093
Hey, Debbie.
635
00:28:44,843 --> 00:28:46,302
Randy's wrong.
636
00:28:46,385 --> 00:28:49,093
Frank'll be committed
to my six babies, right?
637
00:28:49,177 --> 00:28:50,968
Not a chance.
638
00:29:00,759 --> 00:29:03,343
What are you on my ass for?
639
00:29:03,427 --> 00:29:05,343
Find your own bedding.
This is my spot.
640
00:29:05,427 --> 00:29:07,385
I thought we could make a pact.
641
00:29:07,468 --> 00:29:09,093
Either one of us wins,
642
00:29:09,177 --> 00:29:11,718
we split the spokesman money,
50/50.
643
00:29:11,801 --> 00:29:14,926
You trying to hone in
on my dough?
644
00:29:15,010 --> 00:29:17,468
Or am I trying to give you
half of mine?
645
00:29:19,302 --> 00:29:22,093
You're a crafty dude, Mikey O.
646
00:29:23,885 --> 00:29:26,135
I'm a lone wolf. Go.
647
00:29:27,676 --> 00:29:29,177
Suit yourself.
648
00:29:29,260 --> 00:29:30,843
- Suit yourself.
- Go!
649
00:29:37,468 --> 00:29:38,759
Jackpot.
650
00:29:45,468 --> 00:29:47,343
Hey, yo! What are you
doing in that truck?
651
00:29:47,427 --> 00:29:49,926
Get out of there!
652
00:29:51,260 --> 00:29:52,718
- Hey!
- I-I'm...
653
00:29:52,801 --> 00:29:54,427
Get back here!
654
00:29:54,509 --> 00:29:56,551
Where the fuck
do you think you're going?
655
00:29:59,343 --> 00:30:00,593
That's what you get!
656
00:30:00,676 --> 00:30:03,593
Serves you right, asshole!
657
00:30:03,676 --> 00:30:05,718
Yeah, you better keep running!
658
00:30:11,302 --> 00:30:13,302
So was it weird buying
actual green things
659
00:30:13,385 --> 00:30:14,593
at the grocery store?
660
00:30:14,676 --> 00:30:16,069
Hey, I've bought
green things before.
661
00:30:16,093 --> 00:30:18,634
Guacamole, Mountain Dew,
662
00:30:18,718 --> 00:30:20,551
Jell-O,
663
00:30:20,634 --> 00:30:22,302
mint chocolate chip ice cream.
664
00:30:22,385 --> 00:30:24,051
You gonna list every
crappy green thing?
665
00:30:24,135 --> 00:30:25,759
Yeah, I can go on.
Shamrock shakes.
666
00:30:25,843 --> 00:30:27,260
Green eggs and ham.
667
00:30:31,260 --> 00:30:32,801
Xan?
668
00:30:33,968 --> 00:30:35,926
I didn't know where else to go.
669
00:30:39,509 --> 00:30:40,759
Aye, matey!
670
00:30:42,260 --> 00:30:44,343
Popcorn shrimp is back.
671
00:30:46,468 --> 00:30:49,468
My God. Check this out.
672
00:30:49,551 --> 00:30:50,593
Gallagher?
673
00:30:50,676 --> 00:30:51,843
Shit.
674
00:30:51,926 --> 00:30:53,218
What's up, Little Shins?
675
00:30:54,135 --> 00:30:56,010
What, you out here selling?
676
00:30:56,093 --> 00:30:57,093
Just popcorn shrimp.
677
00:31:00,718 --> 00:31:02,093
'Cause we took over this corner.
678
00:31:02,177 --> 00:31:03,759
I don't like no competition.
679
00:31:03,843 --> 00:31:06,177
Hey, you won't have any from me.
680
00:31:06,260 --> 00:31:07,676
So how do I know this whole
681
00:31:07,759 --> 00:31:09,302
gay pirate shit
ain't some front?
682
00:31:09,385 --> 00:31:10,945
I've been out of the business
for years.
683
00:31:11,010 --> 00:31:12,490
I'm just working
at Captain Bob's now.
684
00:31:14,843 --> 00:31:18,218
I got trust issues, man.
What can I say?
685
00:31:18,302 --> 00:31:21,093
I'm gonna have to shake your
Johnny Depp-looking ass down,
686
00:31:21,177 --> 00:31:22,278
make sure
you ain't got no stash.
687
00:31:22,302 --> 00:31:24,634
Yo, I swear to you, I don't.
688
00:31:24,718 --> 00:31:25,885
Shake him.
689
00:31:25,968 --> 00:31:28,468
Fuck. They're just shrimp!
690
00:31:31,634 --> 00:31:33,260
Come on, put me down,
motherfucker!
691
00:31:33,343 --> 00:31:35,260
Watch the hat!
692
00:31:44,968 --> 00:31:45,968
So what happened?
693
00:31:46,051 --> 00:31:47,343
Xan, where's your mom?
694
00:31:48,135 --> 00:31:49,260
Don't know.
695
00:31:50,343 --> 00:31:51,343
Here.
696
00:31:51,427 --> 00:31:53,218
I'll make you something to eat.
697
00:31:53,302 --> 00:31:55,801
W-when's the last time
you saw her?
698
00:31:55,885 --> 00:31:57,427
She went to get pizza.
699
00:31:57,509 --> 00:31:59,926
I waited in the motel.
700
00:32:00,010 --> 00:32:01,468
Watched TV and stuff.
701
00:32:01,551 --> 00:32:02,751
What, and she never came back?
702
00:32:09,593 --> 00:32:10,801
Here you go.
703
00:32:14,051 --> 00:32:15,509
Motel guy kicked me out.
704
00:32:15,593 --> 00:32:17,010
When did this happen?
705
00:32:17,093 --> 00:32:19,385
Couple days ago.
706
00:32:19,468 --> 00:32:21,302
Where have you been
since then, Xan?
707
00:32:22,593 --> 00:32:24,551
Sometimes my mom works
at this truck stop.
708
00:32:24,634 --> 00:32:26,177
I just hung out there.
709
00:32:26,260 --> 00:32:27,926
A truck stop?
710
00:32:28,010 --> 00:32:30,759
There's a bunch
of guys there, but...
711
00:32:30,843 --> 00:32:32,260
my mom never showed up.
712
00:32:32,343 --> 00:32:34,093
Wait, wait, wait,
a bunch of guys?
713
00:32:34,177 --> 00:32:35,569
W-what does that mean?
They fucking touch you?
714
00:32:35,593 --> 00:32:37,302
- Chill out.
- No, I'm not gonna chill
715
00:32:37,385 --> 00:32:38,569
the fuck out.
Her mother ditched her again!
716
00:32:38,593 --> 00:32:41,676
Okay, well, you are scaring her.
717
00:32:41,759 --> 00:32:43,302
I'll give her a bath.
I'll talk to her.
718
00:32:43,385 --> 00:32:45,135
I'll find out
if anything happened.
719
00:32:45,218 --> 00:32:47,177
Okay?
720
00:32:47,260 --> 00:32:49,551
Okay.
721
00:32:54,010 --> 00:32:55,926
It's okay.
722
00:32:56,010 --> 00:32:57,676
I'm sorry, Xan.
723
00:33:02,634 --> 00:33:04,135
Lemonade!
724
00:33:04,218 --> 00:33:06,135
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
725
00:33:06,218 --> 00:33:08,676
Come get your lemonade.
726
00:33:12,676 --> 00:33:15,343
Let me have one
for each one of my guys.
727
00:33:15,427 --> 00:33:17,509
That'll be five bucks.
728
00:33:19,051 --> 00:33:20,343
Keep the change.
729
00:33:20,427 --> 00:33:22,051
Thanks.
730
00:33:29,718 --> 00:33:31,593
How long are you guys
gonna be out here?
731
00:33:31,676 --> 00:33:33,135
I don't know. A while.
732
00:33:43,260 --> 00:33:44,759
You're blocking my driveway.
733
00:33:49,177 --> 00:33:51,885
Lemonade!
Get your fresh lemonade!
734
00:33:59,885 --> 00:34:01,551
Jesus.
735
00:34:01,634 --> 00:34:02,634
Want some lemonade?
736
00:34:12,135 --> 00:34:13,468
Just a Sprite.
737
00:34:13,551 --> 00:34:15,302
Last night fucked with me.
738
00:34:15,385 --> 00:34:16,801
Got a whole new attitude.
739
00:34:16,885 --> 00:34:18,676
- Great.
- Perfect.
740
00:34:18,759 --> 00:34:21,177
Tina,
I got table 41's food for you.
741
00:34:21,260 --> 00:34:22,468
Yeah, okay.
742
00:34:22,551 --> 00:34:25,427
Grilled ham and cheese...
for you,
743
00:34:25,509 --> 00:34:27,385
and the tacos must be for you.
744
00:34:27,468 --> 00:34:30,302
- Enjoy.
- Yes. Thank you.
745
00:34:30,385 --> 00:34:31,593
- Margo.
- Good afternoon.
746
00:34:31,676 --> 00:34:33,051
What brings you here?
747
00:34:33,135 --> 00:34:35,218
Police got a 911 call last night
748
00:34:35,302 --> 00:34:37,593
about a possible robbery.
749
00:34:39,509 --> 00:34:41,269
A frantic woman called,
saying that three men
750
00:34:41,343 --> 00:34:42,843
were threatening her,
751
00:34:42,926 --> 00:34:45,093
and she said they left
but she was afraid
752
00:34:45,177 --> 00:34:47,468
they were gonna come back.
753
00:34:47,551 --> 00:34:50,676
And when the police arrived,
the restaurant was closed,
754
00:34:50,759 --> 00:34:54,509
which is interesting,
since we're open 24 hours.
755
00:34:54,593 --> 00:34:55,968
Maybe they had
the wrong address.
756
00:34:56,051 --> 00:34:57,093
Stop.
757
00:34:59,218 --> 00:35:00,509
I don't want your lies,
758
00:35:00,593 --> 00:35:02,343
and you smell like booze.
759
00:35:02,427 --> 00:35:04,593
I don't know if you're drunk now
760
00:35:04,676 --> 00:35:06,196
or if you just drank
so much last night
761
00:35:06,260 --> 00:35:07,735
that it's just coming
out of your pores.
762
00:35:07,759 --> 00:35:09,093
No, I'm sober.
763
00:35:09,177 --> 00:35:10,509
You're fired.
764
00:35:10,593 --> 00:35:13,051
What?
765
00:35:13,135 --> 00:35:14,926
Well, why?
766
00:35:15,010 --> 00:35:17,135
I-I haven't had a drink
today, I swear.
767
00:35:17,218 --> 00:35:18,610
I've been getting calls
for the past month,
768
00:35:18,634 --> 00:35:21,676
from customers and vendors
and employees,
769
00:35:21,759 --> 00:35:24,676
saying that you had been drunk
on the job
770
00:35:24,759 --> 00:35:27,427
or asleep on the job
or angry on the job.
771
00:35:27,509 --> 00:35:29,468
Please don't fire me. Please.
772
00:35:29,551 --> 00:35:31,427
I-I've had
a rough couple months,
773
00:35:31,509 --> 00:35:33,759
but-but I've turned a corner.
774
00:35:33,843 --> 00:35:35,593
People who say
they've "turned a corner"...
775
00:35:35,676 --> 00:35:37,302
They haven't turned a corner.
776
00:35:37,385 --> 00:35:39,676
They're just trying
to convince everyone they have.
777
00:35:40,676 --> 00:35:42,302
Please give me another chance.
778
00:35:42,385 --> 00:35:44,718
I promise I'll straighten out.
779
00:35:44,801 --> 00:35:45,926
Good.
780
00:35:46,010 --> 00:35:47,135
- You should.
- Yes.
781
00:35:47,218 --> 00:35:49,759
But not on my watch.
782
00:35:49,843 --> 00:35:51,551
You're acting manager now,
783
00:35:51,634 --> 00:35:54,218
so you make sure she cleans
her things up and leaves.
784
00:36:01,135 --> 00:36:02,843
Fuck all of you.
785
00:36:03,634 --> 00:36:05,676
Ratting me out.
786
00:36:07,634 --> 00:36:10,468
If it weren't for me,
none of you NA motherfuckers
787
00:36:10,551 --> 00:36:12,885
would even have a job.
788
00:36:12,968 --> 00:36:15,385
I wanted to fire you
because you suck,
789
00:36:15,468 --> 00:36:16,759
but you called me, crying
790
00:36:16,843 --> 00:36:18,551
about your mother
and her medical bills,
791
00:36:18,634 --> 00:36:20,634
and I let you
keep your fucking job.
792
00:36:20,718 --> 00:36:21,593
Fiona, I think we should just...
793
00:36:21,676 --> 00:36:23,509
Shut the fuck up, Eliza.
794
00:36:23,593 --> 00:36:25,718
I'm leaving.
795
00:36:26,926 --> 00:36:28,759
And guess what.
796
00:36:28,843 --> 00:36:31,885
The cook rubbed his dick
on all of your meals.
797
00:36:31,968 --> 00:36:33,718
Yeah, enjoy.
798
00:36:36,634 --> 00:36:38,177
Can I get the check, please?
799
00:36:38,260 --> 00:36:40,302
Fuck this, matey.
800
00:36:44,593 --> 00:36:46,177
What happened to you?
801
00:36:46,260 --> 00:36:48,051
I got beat up,
shoes thrown at me,
802
00:36:48,135 --> 00:36:50,218
I don't even know how many
milk shakes and beers.
803
00:36:50,302 --> 00:36:52,551
You poor baby.
804
00:36:52,634 --> 00:36:55,051
Come here. Come here.
805
00:36:57,343 --> 00:36:59,634
Um, yeah, I don't think
it's the best idea
806
00:36:59,718 --> 00:37:01,551
to be spinning signs out there.
807
00:37:01,634 --> 00:37:03,468
Got any other jobs in here?
808
00:37:03,551 --> 00:37:05,135
Are you kidding me?
809
00:37:05,218 --> 00:37:07,551
I got a folder full
of applicants wanting jobs
810
00:37:07,634 --> 00:37:09,218
People with master's degrees,
811
00:37:09,302 --> 00:37:11,051
anthropologists
and English majors
812
00:37:11,135 --> 00:37:13,010
and useless things like that.
813
00:37:13,093 --> 00:37:14,551
Wow. Okay.
814
00:37:14,634 --> 00:37:16,801
Besides, you did a great job
out there today.
815
00:37:16,885 --> 00:37:19,135
Sales are up 20%.
816
00:37:19,218 --> 00:37:22,676
I'm ordering more
popcorn shrimp as we speak.
817
00:37:22,759 --> 00:37:25,093
So you'll be back tomorrow,
right?
818
00:37:25,177 --> 00:37:27,634
Yeah. Sure.
819
00:37:27,718 --> 00:37:29,177
Yeah.
820
00:37:29,260 --> 00:37:30,260
Yeah.
821
00:37:33,135 --> 00:37:35,375
Sweetie pies, why were you
hitting Santiago this morning?
822
00:37:35,427 --> 00:37:37,218
'Cause we don't like him.
823
00:37:37,302 --> 00:37:39,427
Why? Santiago's a good guy.
824
00:37:39,509 --> 00:37:40,509
He leaves now?
825
00:37:40,593 --> 00:37:42,551
No, baby, he doesn't leave now.
826
00:37:42,634 --> 00:37:43,759
He's staying here with us.
827
00:37:43,843 --> 00:37:46,051
He's our family.
828
00:37:49,093 --> 00:37:50,676
Fuck.
829
00:37:50,759 --> 00:37:52,885
Girls, is this
because Santiago's
830
00:37:52,968 --> 00:37:55,218
a different shade of brown
than you?
831
00:37:55,302 --> 00:37:58,509
Or, girls, is this because
you're jealous of Santiago?
832
00:37:58,593 --> 00:38:00,177
We need to treat people
833
00:38:00,260 --> 00:38:01,593
how we want to be treated.
834
00:38:01,676 --> 00:38:03,093
There are people in this world
835
00:38:03,177 --> 00:38:05,593
who want to send brown people
like us back to Africa,
836
00:38:05,676 --> 00:38:07,676
but we won't stand for it,
will we?
837
00:38:07,759 --> 00:38:10,093
No. So we also won't stand
838
00:38:10,177 --> 00:38:12,217
for them wanting to send
other kinds of brown people
839
00:38:12,260 --> 00:38:14,177
back to Central America.
840
00:38:14,260 --> 00:38:15,260
Get it?
841
00:38:16,759 --> 00:38:19,260
Let me try. Snookums,
842
00:38:19,343 --> 00:38:21,468
I used to have sibling rivalry
843
00:38:21,551 --> 00:38:23,718
with the kids
in my foster homes, okay?
844
00:38:23,801 --> 00:38:26,135
Especially this one boy,
Joey Caccitore.
845
00:38:26,218 --> 00:38:28,051
He used to kiss up
to my foster parents
846
00:38:28,135 --> 00:38:29,843
all the time,
and they would give him
847
00:38:29,926 --> 00:38:31,634
extra butterscotch pudding,
848
00:38:31,718 --> 00:38:34,093
and I thought
that they loved him more,
849
00:38:34,177 --> 00:38:35,468
but in reality,
850
00:38:35,551 --> 00:38:37,759
they just hated all of us.
851
00:38:37,843 --> 00:38:39,926
- Kev, how is that helping?
- I don't know.
852
00:38:40,010 --> 00:38:41,718
I forget that's how
the story ended.
853
00:38:41,801 --> 00:38:43,509
I'll get it.
854
00:38:43,593 --> 00:38:44,468
Talk about
the brown people more.
855
00:38:44,551 --> 00:38:46,051
I think that was helping.
856
00:38:46,676 --> 00:38:49,093
Just because Santiago's here
doesn't mean we love you less,
857
00:38:49,177 --> 00:38:50,926
and just because he's different
858
00:38:51,010 --> 00:38:52,444
doesn't mean that
we're gonna get rid of him.
859
00:38:52,468 --> 00:38:53,759
- V.
- Yeah?
860
00:38:53,843 --> 00:38:55,843
- Look who it is.
- Hi.
861
00:38:55,926 --> 00:38:56,968
Martina!
862
00:38:57,051 --> 00:38:58,051
Santiago!
863
00:39:12,093 --> 00:39:13,427
Only 30 seconds left.
864
00:39:13,509 --> 00:39:15,593
What the hell was that?
865
00:39:15,676 --> 00:39:17,593
Smacking me with
a two by four out there?
866
00:39:17,676 --> 00:39:19,385
That's the way
we're gonna play this thing?
867
00:39:19,468 --> 00:39:22,343
All's fair in love
and hobo wars, Frank.
868
00:39:23,801 --> 00:39:25,968
Gauntlet thrown, my friend.
869
00:39:30,093 --> 00:39:31,926
Just got off the phone
with the client.
870
00:39:32,010 --> 00:39:33,801
Four Greek councils
have signed deals
871
00:39:33,885 --> 00:39:35,694
to make Hobo Loco their
featured alcoholic beverage
872
00:39:35,718 --> 00:39:37,302
at all their fraternity parties.
873
00:39:37,385 --> 00:39:39,218
We're blowing up.
874
00:39:39,302 --> 00:39:40,735
The Insta' Story I just posted
less than an hour ago
875
00:39:40,759 --> 00:39:42,177
already has 100,000 viewers.
876
00:39:45,385 --> 00:39:46,926
Sorry, Victor.
877
00:39:47,010 --> 00:39:48,593
You've been eliminated.
878
00:39:48,676 --> 00:39:50,218
And then there were 19.
879
00:39:50,302 --> 00:39:52,343
Cardboard amateur.
880
00:39:52,427 --> 00:39:53,427
Bubble wrap.
881
00:39:53,468 --> 00:39:54,593
Nice touch, Frank.
882
00:39:56,968 --> 00:40:00,010
Ooh, but not as clever
as insulation and tarp!
883
00:40:00,093 --> 00:40:01,759
- Ha!
- You are the winner
884
00:40:01,843 --> 00:40:03,634
- of this challenge, Mikey O.
- Yeah!
885
00:40:06,051 --> 00:40:07,111
All right, let's get out there
886
00:40:07,135 --> 00:40:09,135
for our next challenge
887
00:40:09,218 --> 00:40:11,759
Dumpster diving for your dinner.
888
00:40:11,843 --> 00:40:14,135
Who thinks they can bring back
the best meal?
889
00:40:14,218 --> 00:40:15,801
- I can!
- Well, let's see!
890
00:40:15,885 --> 00:40:17,468
Whoo! Go! Go! Go!
891
00:40:17,551 --> 00:40:19,177
- Whoo!
- One hour! Let's go!
892
00:40:19,260 --> 00:40:21,302
Don't forget to share
your Hobo Loco
893
00:40:21,385 --> 00:40:23,260
on social media!
894
00:40:25,634 --> 00:40:26,819
We're gonna make
the American hobo
895
00:40:26,843 --> 00:40:29,093
as famous as Joe Camel.
896
00:40:50,427 --> 00:40:52,759
You did good, coming here.
897
00:40:52,843 --> 00:40:55,093
You know, Lip's a smart guy.
898
00:40:55,177 --> 00:40:57,093
I like him.
899
00:40:57,177 --> 00:40:59,843
He'll figure this out.
900
00:40:59,926 --> 00:41:01,509
Yeah.
901
00:41:01,593 --> 00:41:04,010
But you can't be hanging out
at truck stops, right?
902
00:41:04,093 --> 00:41:05,885
It's a lot of creepy people
out there.
903
00:41:07,593 --> 00:41:09,885
Look, if I saw...
904
00:41:09,968 --> 00:41:12,218
If I saw a little girl
on the street alone,
905
00:41:12,302 --> 00:41:14,385
I would want to protect her,
906
00:41:14,468 --> 00:41:16,926
make sure she was safe,
907
00:41:17,010 --> 00:41:18,527
but there are
some bad people out there
908
00:41:18,551 --> 00:41:20,302
who'd want to hurt her,
909
00:41:20,385 --> 00:41:22,218
maybe say stuff
910
00:41:22,302 --> 00:41:24,843
or do stuff to her.
911
00:41:24,926 --> 00:41:26,759
If that ever happened,
912
00:41:26,843 --> 00:41:28,260
you can tell me about it.
913
00:41:30,260 --> 00:41:32,801
Hey, I'd listen to anything
you have to say,
914
00:41:32,885 --> 00:41:34,759
try and make you feel better,
915
00:41:34,843 --> 00:41:37,010
or maybe even beat the shit
out of that person.
916
00:41:37,093 --> 00:41:38,343
I don't know.
917
00:41:41,509 --> 00:41:42,759
Come on.
918
00:41:42,843 --> 00:41:43,883
Let's go raid Lip's closet
919
00:41:43,926 --> 00:41:45,366
and find you
something clean to wear.
920
00:41:46,593 --> 00:41:48,135
No, Sally, I didn't say
921
00:41:48,218 --> 00:41:50,551
that you were responsible
for Lou not remembering
922
00:41:50,634 --> 00:41:52,801
your birthday.
923
00:41:52,885 --> 00:41:54,759
I said you were responsible
924
00:41:54,843 --> 00:41:56,051
for the way you reacted
925
00:41:56,135 --> 00:41:58,051
to Lou not remembering
your birthday.
926
00:41:58,135 --> 00:42:00,509
Guess who just got
fucking fired!
927
00:42:02,135 --> 00:42:03,885
Are you shushing me
in my own house?
928
00:42:03,968 --> 00:42:05,385
She's doing
a phone therapy session
929
00:42:05,468 --> 00:42:06,885
with her client Sally.
930
00:42:06,968 --> 00:42:09,135
Hey, Sally.
931
00:42:09,218 --> 00:42:12,177
Sally, I got all the therapy
you could ever need right here!
932
00:42:12,260 --> 00:42:13,676
- Sorry, Sally...
- What happened?
933
00:42:13,759 --> 00:42:15,135
Why'd you get fired?
934
00:42:15,218 --> 00:42:17,302
Bullshit this, bullshit that,
935
00:42:17,385 --> 00:42:19,135
blah, blah, blah.
936
00:42:20,010 --> 00:42:21,427
So what's your plan now?
937
00:42:21,509 --> 00:42:23,109
Gonna hang around here,
drinking all day?
938
00:42:24,551 --> 00:42:27,135
No, I-I might eat something too.
939
00:42:27,218 --> 00:42:29,343
What about money?
940
00:42:29,427 --> 00:42:31,885
Could you stop whining about
money for two seconds, maybe?
941
00:42:35,801 --> 00:42:38,926
Brought some popcorn shrimp
back from my shitty-ass job.
942
00:42:39,010 --> 00:42:41,135
- Yum.
- I'm turning the furnace on.
943
00:42:41,218 --> 00:42:42,968
Gotta check
for carbon monoxide leaks.
944
00:42:45,634 --> 00:42:47,509
You need a job, Fiona.
945
00:43:00,843 --> 00:43:02,759
What the hell?
946
00:43:28,093 --> 00:43:29,926
No! Shit!
947
00:43:31,801 --> 00:43:33,385
Come on.
948
00:43:39,509 --> 00:43:40,385
Fuck.
949
00:43:40,468 --> 00:43:41,759
Help!
950
00:43:41,843 --> 00:43:43,218
I'm stuck down here!
951
00:43:43,302 --> 00:43:45,759
I'm coming. I'm coming.
952
00:43:47,260 --> 00:43:49,218
I said I'm coming!
953
00:43:49,302 --> 00:43:50,694
So, what I'm hearing
you say, Sally,
954
00:43:50,718 --> 00:43:53,093
is that even though
you're still mad at Lou,
955
00:43:53,177 --> 00:43:55,551
you are willing to focus
on the good things he does.
956
00:43:55,634 --> 00:43:58,177
Sally, your therapist
is having a tea party
957
00:43:58,260 --> 00:43:59,593
with stuffed animals.
958
00:43:59,676 --> 00:44:01,427
Door's open.
959
00:44:01,509 --> 00:44:02,759
Yeah?
960
00:44:02,843 --> 00:44:04,218
We're looking for Ingrid.
961
00:44:04,302 --> 00:44:06,177
I'm her ex-husband.
This is Dr. Kwan...
962
00:44:06,260 --> 00:44:07,485
I don't give a fuck who you are.
963
00:44:07,509 --> 00:44:08,593
She's right here.
964
00:44:11,177 --> 00:44:12,302
Yeah, you know, Sally,
965
00:44:12,385 --> 00:44:13,801
we will have
to continue this later
966
00:44:13,885 --> 00:44:15,634
same time next week.
967
00:44:19,302 --> 00:44:21,968
I cannot believe
that you betrayed me
968
00:44:22,051 --> 00:44:23,593
and brought her here.
969
00:44:23,676 --> 00:44:25,427
Ingrid, Dr. Kwan explained to me
970
00:44:25,509 --> 00:44:27,427
that you will bleed out and die
971
00:44:27,509 --> 00:44:29,260
if you carry six babies to term.
972
00:44:29,343 --> 00:44:32,135
Then why did you implant
all those embryos in me?
973
00:44:32,218 --> 00:44:33,735
Because there was only
a five percent chance
974
00:44:33,759 --> 00:44:35,634
of any of them
surviving implantation
975
00:44:35,718 --> 00:44:37,509
in your shriveled-up uterus.
976
00:44:37,593 --> 00:44:39,718
So what you're saying is,
I'm a medical miracle?
977
00:44:39,801 --> 00:44:41,302
You'll be a medical tragedy
978
00:44:41,385 --> 00:44:43,302
if you carry all six
of those fetuses to term.
979
00:44:43,385 --> 00:44:45,468
I am willing to take my chances.
980
00:44:45,551 --> 00:44:46,986
Ingrid, we are gonna go
to Dr. Kwan's office.
981
00:44:47,010 --> 00:44:48,676
- No.
- She is gonna do
982
00:44:48,759 --> 00:44:49,593
- the procedure, and then...
- No, no, no, no.
983
00:44:49,676 --> 00:44:50,843
I will take you home.
984
00:44:50,926 --> 00:44:52,468
No! Get out of my house!
985
00:44:52,551 --> 00:44:54,718
Bitch, if you don't come
to my office right now,
986
00:44:54,801 --> 00:44:57,343
I will go North Korean on you
and reach into your vagina
987
00:44:57,427 --> 00:44:59,676
and rip those embryos
out of you with my bare hands!
988
00:44:59,759 --> 00:45:01,718
Doctor, please!
989
00:45:01,801 --> 00:45:03,759
She is trying to kill my babies!
990
00:45:05,759 --> 00:45:07,676
Ingrid?
991
00:45:08,926 --> 00:45:10,634
Ingrid? Crap.
992
00:45:10,718 --> 00:45:11,801
Ingy.
993
00:45:14,010 --> 00:45:16,509
Ingrid? Open this door!
994
00:45:16,593 --> 00:45:18,427
- Please.
- Hello?
995
00:45:18,509 --> 00:45:20,010
- Is somebody down here?
- Please!
996
00:45:20,093 --> 00:45:21,218
- I'm trapped!
- Ingrid.
997
00:45:21,302 --> 00:45:23,718
Well, we all feel trapped
at some point.
998
00:45:23,801 --> 00:45:25,551
Do you want to talk about it?
999
00:45:25,634 --> 00:45:28,385
No, you crazy bitch!
It's Debbie!
1000
00:45:28,468 --> 00:45:30,926
I need to get out of here
and turn off the gas
1001
00:45:31,010 --> 00:45:32,343
before the house blows up!
1002
00:45:32,427 --> 00:45:34,676
Debbie?
1003
00:45:34,759 --> 00:45:35,509
Debbie?
1004
00:45:35,593 --> 00:45:36,676
Help!
1005
00:45:36,759 --> 00:45:38,801
Help!
1006
00:45:38,885 --> 00:45:40,468
Somebody help!
1007
00:45:40,551 --> 00:45:41,718
Debbie?
1008
00:45:41,801 --> 00:45:42,801
Kelly?
1009
00:45:46,634 --> 00:45:47,801
My pants are stuck.
1010
00:45:47,885 --> 00:45:49,385
Can you take them off?
1011
00:45:49,468 --> 00:45:50,343
What?
1012
00:45:50,427 --> 00:45:52,885
Just take off your pants!
1013
00:46:10,468 --> 00:46:11,718
My God.
1014
00:46:17,135 --> 00:46:18,718
Nice ass.
1015
00:46:20,427 --> 00:46:21,718
Let's get that gas turned off.
1016
00:46:31,177 --> 00:46:33,843
Thank you for dinner,
fancy French restaurant.
1017
00:46:33,926 --> 00:46:35,551
Yeah!
1018
00:46:35,634 --> 00:46:37,885
Any escargots in here?
1019
00:46:40,843 --> 00:46:41,926
Whoa! Hey!
1020
00:46:42,010 --> 00:46:44,135
Come on! Hey!
1021
00:46:44,218 --> 00:46:47,385
All's fair, Mikey O. All's fair.
1022
00:46:47,468 --> 00:46:48,926
Come on, now!
1023
00:46:49,010 --> 00:46:51,427
Come on! Aww!
1024
00:47:02,634 --> 00:47:04,385
What's going on, fellas?
1025
00:47:04,468 --> 00:47:06,218
Nothing. Just selling lemonade.
1026
00:47:06,302 --> 00:47:08,177
Neighbor said
there was a disturbance.
1027
00:47:08,260 --> 00:47:09,527
Yeah, Officer, I called.
That was me.
1028
00:47:09,551 --> 00:47:10,885
Seems to be the problem?
1029
00:47:10,968 --> 00:47:12,718
These kids are up to no good.
1030
00:47:12,801 --> 00:47:14,319
They are making
way too much noise, okay?
1031
00:47:14,343 --> 00:47:16,093
They are getting water
on my car.
1032
00:47:16,177 --> 00:47:17,801
Noise? That's Tyler the Creator.
1033
00:47:17,885 --> 00:47:19,010
They don't belong here, sir.
1034
00:47:19,093 --> 00:47:20,676
We live two streets over.
1035
00:47:20,759 --> 00:47:22,218
Well, I mean,
do you have a-a permit
1036
00:47:22,302 --> 00:47:23,361
to operate a food stand
in front of my house?
1037
00:47:23,385 --> 00:47:24,801
Ask them, sir. Do they?
1038
00:47:24,885 --> 00:47:26,385
You need a permit
to sell lemonade?
1039
00:47:30,135 --> 00:47:32,509
Eighty-three-ten will respond.
1040
00:47:32,593 --> 00:47:34,509
Move the lemonade stand
down the street
1041
00:47:34,593 --> 00:47:35,843
and turn down the music.
1042
00:47:35,926 --> 00:47:37,260
Wait, sir, that's it?
1043
00:47:37,343 --> 00:47:38,801
What do you want me to do, lady?
1044
00:47:38,885 --> 00:47:40,385
Shut them down.
1045
00:47:40,468 --> 00:47:42,051
I just got my car washed.
1046
00:47:44,177 --> 00:47:46,093
You know what?
1047
00:47:46,177 --> 00:47:47,527
Looks like y'all made
enough money.
1048
00:47:47,551 --> 00:47:48,735
Why don't you close up shop
for the day?
1049
00:47:48,759 --> 00:47:50,218
What? Why?
1050
00:47:51,551 --> 00:47:53,051
Just do it.
1051
00:47:53,135 --> 00:47:55,218
It's not worth the aggravation.
1052
00:47:55,302 --> 00:47:56,385
Here's 20 bucks.
1053
00:47:57,968 --> 00:47:59,843
Get yourself a permit.
1054
00:48:06,885 --> 00:48:09,093
Well, you heard the man.
Shut the shit down.
1055
00:48:36,718 --> 00:48:38,759
This is great.
1056
00:48:38,843 --> 00:48:42,385
Big family dinner.
This is exactly what I wanted.
1057
00:48:42,468 --> 00:48:44,634
Are you enjoying
the food, Martina?
1058
00:48:44,718 --> 00:48:46,885
Better than what they had
in the holding cell.
1059
00:48:48,468 --> 00:48:50,051
I am so sorry
they put you there.
1060
00:48:50,135 --> 00:48:53,218
This is not what America's
normally like.
1061
00:48:53,302 --> 00:48:54,319
I thought you were
supposed to be
1062
00:48:54,343 --> 00:48:55,885
the greatest country
in the world.
1063
00:48:57,010 --> 00:48:58,885
You caught us at a bad time.
1064
00:49:08,218 --> 00:49:10,843
Hey, what do you say we, um,
finish up dinner
1065
00:49:10,926 --> 00:49:12,551
and watch some TV?
1066
00:49:12,634 --> 00:49:15,093
You guys have Pawn Stars
in Guatemala?
1067
00:49:18,385 --> 00:49:20,759
We cannot stay after dinner.
1068
00:49:20,843 --> 00:49:22,135
We have to go back.
1069
00:49:23,343 --> 00:49:25,676
Back? To the detention center?
1070
00:49:25,759 --> 00:49:27,427
To Guatemala.
1071
00:49:27,509 --> 00:49:29,177
We go tonight with our uncle.
1072
00:49:29,260 --> 00:49:30,427
Your uncle?
1073
00:49:30,509 --> 00:49:31,885
Jose Gomez?
1074
00:49:33,468 --> 00:49:35,551
Our father was deported,
so we have to go back
1075
00:49:35,634 --> 00:49:36,759
to be with him.
1076
00:49:36,843 --> 00:49:39,468
Deported? I'm so sorry.
1077
00:49:39,551 --> 00:49:42,177
Sí. Thank you for
1078
00:49:42,260 --> 00:49:44,135
offering to foster us,
1079
00:49:44,218 --> 00:49:46,593
but your country no longer wants
1080
00:49:46,676 --> 00:49:49,593
the tired and poor,
yearning to be free,
1081
00:49:49,676 --> 00:49:52,926
like the big green lady
in the New York Harbor says.
1082
00:49:53,010 --> 00:49:54,218
Big green lady?
1083
00:49:54,302 --> 00:49:55,676
Statue of Liberty.
1084
00:50:03,843 --> 00:50:06,385
She's been napping a long time.
1085
00:50:06,468 --> 00:50:08,260
Probably hasn't slept in days.
1086
00:50:09,135 --> 00:50:10,926
Yeah, you know,
you can go if you want.
1087
00:50:11,885 --> 00:50:13,177
Are you giving me permission?
1088
00:50:13,260 --> 00:50:13,926
No.
1089
00:50:14,010 --> 00:50:16,427
No, I just mean
1090
00:50:16,509 --> 00:50:18,593
if this is too much
to deal with,
1091
00:50:18,676 --> 00:50:19,759
you know, I understand.
1092
00:50:19,843 --> 00:50:20,885
You really think I do
1093
00:50:20,968 --> 00:50:22,218
anything I don't want to do?
1094
00:50:26,385 --> 00:50:29,509
No, probably not.
1095
00:50:29,593 --> 00:50:30,885
Damn right.
1096
00:50:40,468 --> 00:50:42,177
Got you. Yes.
1097
00:50:44,051 --> 00:50:45,759
Hi.
1098
00:50:45,843 --> 00:50:47,427
Hey, buddy. What's up?
1099
00:50:47,509 --> 00:50:48,885
Some lady called the cops on me.
1100
00:50:48,968 --> 00:50:50,801
What'd you do?
1101
00:50:50,885 --> 00:50:52,694
Nothing, just selling lemonade
in front of her house.
1102
00:50:52,718 --> 00:50:55,634
Said we got water
on her fancy car.
1103
00:51:01,634 --> 00:51:03,093
What lady?
1104
00:51:03,177 --> 00:51:04,468
Over on Bundy.
1105
00:51:04,551 --> 00:51:05,944
The one who bought
Mr. Reeback's house
1106
00:51:05,968 --> 00:51:06,968
and redid it?
1107
00:51:09,135 --> 00:51:10,302
Who were you with?
1108
00:51:10,385 --> 00:51:11,385
Some friends from school,
1109
00:51:11,468 --> 00:51:12,885
Todd and De-shawn.
1110
00:51:12,968 --> 00:51:14,260
Black kids?
1111
00:51:14,343 --> 00:51:16,177
Yeah.
1112
00:51:16,260 --> 00:51:18,010
Motherfucker.
1113
00:51:20,302 --> 00:51:21,593
Yo!
1114
00:51:27,718 --> 00:51:30,051
We're not gonna eat
this stuff, right?
1115
00:51:30,135 --> 00:51:31,427
No, hell no.
1116
00:51:31,509 --> 00:51:32,968
We're gonna Fear Factor
this shit.
1117
00:51:33,051 --> 00:51:34,093
I made it!
1118
00:51:34,177 --> 00:51:35,051
I made it.
1119
00:51:35,135 --> 00:51:37,593
Shit. Damn it.
1120
00:51:39,801 --> 00:51:42,093
Can't keep this player
from the game, Frank.
1121
00:51:42,177 --> 00:51:43,177
How did you get out?
1122
00:51:43,260 --> 00:51:45,010
Garbage truck came by.
1123
00:51:45,093 --> 00:51:47,135
Dumped me in the back.
It was rough,
1124
00:51:47,218 --> 00:51:49,135
but a pile of old Big Macs
broke my fall.
1125
00:51:49,218 --> 00:51:50,718
All right, welcome back.
1126
00:51:50,801 --> 00:51:52,260
We'll now go around
and take our pick
1127
00:51:52,343 --> 00:51:55,634
for the dumpster dive
competition.
1128
00:51:56,968 --> 00:51:58,135
Sushi?
1129
00:51:58,218 --> 00:51:59,385
Brave choice.
1130
00:52:24,676 --> 00:52:26,135
Hey!
1131
00:52:26,218 --> 00:52:28,759
You know that new bitch
over on Bundy?
1132
00:52:28,843 --> 00:52:30,260
Yeah, she pulled
some racist shit
1133
00:52:30,343 --> 00:52:31,634
on my brother Liam,
1134
00:52:31,718 --> 00:52:33,343
so block party. Come on.
1135
00:52:39,676 --> 00:52:41,634
Hey, Mr. Jackson. We're throwing
1136
00:52:41,718 --> 00:52:43,759
a new racist neighbor
a welcome party.
1137
00:52:43,843 --> 00:52:45,218
Bring your pit bull.
1138
00:52:45,302 --> 00:52:46,968
Come on, boy. Let's go.
1139
00:53:01,509 --> 00:53:03,093
Welcome to the South Side,
bitch!
1140
00:53:10,093 --> 00:53:12,427
You sure you want to do this?
1141
00:53:12,509 --> 00:53:14,551
Sí.
1142
00:53:29,051 --> 00:53:31,885
Speaking Spanish.
1143
00:53:51,676 --> 00:53:54,427
I have no idea what he said.
1144
00:53:54,509 --> 00:53:56,759
It was good. He smiled.
1145
00:54:00,093 --> 00:54:02,385
There goes my son.
1146
00:54:09,551 --> 00:54:11,718
I have called the police.
1147
00:54:13,343 --> 00:54:16,218
They are on their way.
1148
00:54:16,302 --> 00:54:18,718
You are disturbing the peace.
1149
00:54:18,801 --> 00:54:20,843
Hey, lady.
1150
00:54:20,926 --> 00:54:23,427
That was my brother
with the lemonade stand.
1151
00:54:23,509 --> 00:54:25,177
- What?
- That's right.
1152
00:54:25,260 --> 00:54:26,427
I got a black brother.
1153
00:54:29,135 --> 00:54:30,843
What?
That's why you didn't want him
1154
00:54:30,926 --> 00:54:32,593
near your house, right?
1155
00:54:32,676 --> 00:54:34,926
'Cause he's black?
1156
00:54:35,010 --> 00:54:37,634
Okay, you need to go home.
1157
00:54:37,718 --> 00:54:39,676
Some of us have jobs.
1158
00:54:39,759 --> 00:54:40,986
You know, I lived
in this neighborhood
1159
00:54:41,010 --> 00:54:43,593
my whole life.
1160
00:54:43,676 --> 00:54:47,468
Kids have always
sold lemonade right here.
1161
00:54:47,551 --> 00:54:50,427
Black kids, white kids,
1162
00:54:50,509 --> 00:54:52,885
Russian kids, Mexican kids.
1163
00:54:52,968 --> 00:54:55,593
Would you get away
from my fence?
1164
00:54:55,676 --> 00:55:00,302
Nobody ever had a problem
with lemonade stands
1165
00:55:00,385 --> 00:55:03,759
until all of you bougie,
1166
00:55:03,843 --> 00:55:05,759
yoga-loving,
1167
00:55:05,843 --> 00:55:07,926
latte-sipping,
1168
00:55:08,010 --> 00:55:12,801
ankle tattoo-wearing,
racist assholes
1169
00:55:12,885 --> 00:55:15,177
moved into our neighborhood,
so your fence?
1170
00:55:16,385 --> 00:55:18,260
Fuck your fence.
1171
00:55:28,343 --> 00:55:30,509
Shit!
1172
00:55:30,593 --> 00:55:31,593
Hey!
1173
00:56:15,801 --> 00:56:18,177
Video of the food challenge
went viral.
1174
00:56:18,260 --> 00:56:20,177
Over 400,000 views.
1175
00:56:20,260 --> 00:56:23,551
People are doing something
called the "Hobo Dragon."
1176
00:56:28,093 --> 00:56:31,801
We are totally getting
promoted after this.
1177
00:56:31,885 --> 00:56:33,801
Another
alcohol poisoning inside?
1178
00:56:33,885 --> 00:56:35,593
Yeah, fourth one today.
79283
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