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1
00:00:15,885 --> 00:00:20,716
Romeo, Romeo, wherefore art
thou Romeo? Deny thy father,
2
00:00:20,759 --> 00:00:25,634
and refuse thy name... Or if
thou wilt not, but but sworn
3
00:00:25,677 --> 00:00:26,635
my love...
4
00:00:26,678 --> 00:00:30,813
Oh this is terrible. Come on!
5
00:00:32,467 --> 00:00:35,861
Why are the shushing me?
It's those apple-johns
6
00:00:35,905 --> 00:00:37,820
on stage who are
butchering the material!
7
00:00:37,863 --> 00:00:41,867
Sir, please be quiet. You are
disturbing the other patrons.
8
00:00:41,911 --> 00:00:42,999
Oooops!
9
00:00:43,043 --> 00:00:46,002
OOOW! You scalded me, you
Jackenape!
10
00:00:46,046 --> 00:00:49,223
Sir, I've already asked
you to keep it down.
11
00:00:49,266 --> 00:00:52,748
What Cold Pole disturbs
the traffic of our stage?
12
00:00:52,791 --> 00:00:55,925
All right sir, it is time
for you to make haste.
13
00:00:55,968 --> 00:01:03,802
You don't tell me what to
make! Unhand me! Ahhh!
14
00:01:03,846 --> 00:01:08,503
Throw me out? I'll throw
YOU out! Stupid hacks.
15
00:01:08,546 --> 00:01:10,070
Misinterpreting the material.
16
00:01:10,113 --> 00:01:13,769
It's the Bard, for
crying out loud!
17
00:01:13,812 --> 00:01:15,292
No respect...
18
00:01:15,336 --> 00:01:16,772
Sir, there's no loitering here.
19
00:01:16,815 --> 00:01:19,340
I'm not loitering. I was
thrown out of the theater for
20
00:01:19,383 --> 00:01:22,908
having taste, and now I'm
waiting for my friends.
21
00:01:22,952 --> 00:01:25,041
Well, my friend. And his
wife.
22
00:01:25,085 --> 00:01:26,260
Sure you are.
23
00:01:26,303 --> 00:01:27,217
Listen sir, although
I am concerned with
24
00:01:27,261 --> 00:01:28,044
the plight of the homeless...
25
00:01:28,088 --> 00:01:29,698
I'm not homeless!!
26
00:01:29,741 --> 00:01:31,569
Then here is your
ticket for loitering.
27
00:01:31,613 --> 00:01:32,788
Loitering!?
28
00:01:32,831 --> 00:01:35,878
Move along sir,
don't make me arrest you.
29
00:01:35,921 --> 00:01:38,707
It's never ending with this
place!
30
00:01:38,750 --> 00:01:40,926
Got the cops on the take...
31
00:01:43,233 --> 00:01:44,495
Why didn't you just go home?
32
00:01:44,539 --> 00:01:46,671
Because I wanted to share
with you how awful
33
00:01:46,715 --> 00:01:50,066
I thought that play
was - it was AWFUL!
34
00:01:50,110 --> 00:01:51,937
Why aren't you two
angry?
35
00:01:51,981 --> 00:01:52,982
I'm angry!
36
00:01:53,025 --> 00:01:54,897
I'll admit,
it wasn't very good.
37
00:01:54,940 --> 00:01:58,118
but that theatre's kind
of sentimental for us.
38
00:01:58,161 --> 00:01:59,728
Chris took me there
on our first date.
39
00:01:59,771 --> 00:02:01,512
And you're still with him?!
40
00:02:01,556 --> 00:02:02,557
Hey!
41
00:02:02,600 --> 00:02:04,211
I want my money back!
42
00:02:04,254 --> 00:02:06,300
You didn't spend any money. We
bought your ticket, remember?
43
00:02:06,343 --> 00:02:08,258
Then I want your money
back.
44
00:02:08,302 --> 00:02:09,825
You have a good night, Dan.
45
00:02:09,868 --> 00:02:12,828
No chance of that now.
46
00:02:12,871 --> 00:02:14,830
Hey, Ty, great show tonight.
47
00:02:14,873 --> 00:02:15,831
Oh, thanks.
48
00:02:15,874 --> 00:02:17,963
Not as good as me, of course.
49
00:02:18,007 --> 00:02:23,795
Ew, gross, my soda's warm.
50
00:02:23,839 --> 00:02:26,494
That's the last straw!
51
00:02:26,537 --> 00:02:32,152
YE OLDE SHAKESPEARE DINNER
THEATRE!
52
00:02:41,596 --> 00:02:42,945
So, he's all,
53
00:02:42,988 --> 00:02:45,034
"The cod pieces are for
actors only" and I'm like,
54
00:02:45,077 --> 00:02:46,427
"Shut up."
55
00:02:46,470 --> 00:02:48,690
I know, it's like, dude,
don't tell me how to spend
56
00:02:48,733 --> 00:02:50,779
my day off.
57
00:03:05,097 --> 00:03:08,275
Is this a mask I see before me?
58
00:03:08,318 --> 00:03:15,760
A suitably menacing mask
with which to seek revenge.
59
00:03:15,804 --> 00:03:22,811
Muah, ha, ha! I need a cape.
60
00:03:25,683 --> 00:03:28,120
The actors want a mini-fridge
in their dressing room.
61
00:03:28,164 --> 00:03:31,863
You're kidding. Well, I guess
we have to give it to them.
62
00:03:31,907 --> 00:03:35,606
Can't have a theatre company
without actors, can we?
63
00:03:35,650 --> 00:03:41,438
Why, no. No, you
can not. Muah, ha, ha!
64
00:03:41,482 --> 00:03:44,093
Excuse me, who are you?
65
00:03:44,136 --> 00:03:51,274
Hm? Oh. Uh - Uh - No one.
Just some guy. In a mask.
66
00:03:51,318 --> 00:03:53,798
Carry on.
67
00:03:53,842 --> 00:03:55,670
He seemed nice.
68
00:04:00,805 --> 00:04:02,329
Hello?
69
00:04:02,372 --> 00:04:05,810
I've found a plan that sets
my heart aglow. With wicked
70
00:04:05,854 --> 00:04:10,075
glee, my vengeance all too
near. Without performers,
71
00:04:10,119 --> 00:04:14,645
there can't be a show. So
one by one, I'll make them
72
00:04:14,689 --> 00:04:16,299
disappear!
73
00:04:16,343 --> 00:04:20,825
Dan? Is that a poem? Wait, do I
have to write him a poem now?
74
00:04:20,869 --> 00:04:23,828
Let's see. Trap door
opens with a pit of
75
00:04:23,872 --> 00:04:28,093
spikes beneath... Sandbag
falls from the rafters,
76
00:04:28,137 --> 00:04:30,052
crushing one of them...
77
00:04:30,095 --> 00:04:32,620
Hold right there, brigand!
78
00:04:32,663 --> 00:04:39,061
You don't frighten me
with your tomatoes.
79
00:04:39,104 --> 00:04:46,460
Ah! Ah! OW!! That one was
frozen!
80
00:04:46,503 --> 00:04:52,204
You haven't seen the last
of me! Muah, ha, ha!
81
00:04:53,728 --> 00:04:58,472
Out, damned spot! Out,
I say!
82
00:05:00,387 --> 00:05:01,997
Pick up, you renegade...
83
00:05:03,390 --> 00:05:04,739
Hello?
84
00:05:04,782 --> 00:05:08,351
We have to make them pay.
They bruised my face with
85
00:05:08,395 --> 00:05:13,400
frozen produce. They're going
down. Come over right now.
86
00:05:13,443 --> 00:05:14,836
Nope, I'm on a date.
87
00:05:14,879 --> 00:05:15,880
With Elise?
88
00:05:15,924 --> 00:05:17,186
Yes Dan!
89
00:05:17,229 --> 00:05:20,102
You'd rather spend time
with some girl than help
90
00:05:20,145 --> 00:05:21,625
me get revenge?
91
00:05:21,669 --> 00:05:24,715
When are you going to grow
up?
92
00:05:27,065 --> 00:05:28,850
Okay, so what's the problem?
93
00:05:28,893 --> 00:05:32,375
They have ridiculous security.
I got inside earlier, and was
94
00:05:32,419 --> 00:05:37,815
immediately set upon by a pack
of rabid Shakespearians.
95
00:05:37,859 --> 00:05:38,947
Just give me a boost!
96
00:05:38,990 --> 00:05:42,907
I think that window's
unlocked.
97
00:05:42,951 --> 00:05:44,518
Hey! Watch it!
98
00:05:44,561 --> 00:05:48,260
Aaargh! Stupid thing! Hang
on, I need better leverage.
99
00:05:48,304 --> 00:05:50,872
Ahh! My thumb!
100
00:05:50,915 --> 00:05:54,441
What art thee doing
peeking in yon window?
101
00:05:54,484 --> 00:05:56,356
Mind your own business.
102
00:05:56,399 --> 00:05:59,402
Do you bite your
thumb at us, sir?
103
00:05:59,446 --> 00:06:03,580
I do bite my thumb, uh, sir.
104
00:06:03,624 --> 00:06:07,976
Why are you guys wearing swords?
You're not even on stage.
105
00:06:08,019 --> 00:06:10,239
All the world's a stage.
106
00:06:10,282 --> 00:06:12,763
That's not even what
that quote means!
107
00:06:12,807 --> 00:06:13,808
Is too.
108
00:06:13,851 --> 00:06:16,419
Do you bite your
thumb at us, sir?
109
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:18,552
Is this guy being serious, Dan?
110
00:06:18,595 --> 00:06:20,684
Have at thee!
111
00:06:20,728 --> 00:06:21,250
Ah!
112
00:06:21,293 --> 00:06:23,948
Hey!
113
00:06:23,992 --> 00:06:25,994
I am hurt.
114
00:06:26,037 --> 00:06:28,866
A plague o' both your
houses!
115
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,912
Yeah, both of them!
116
00:06:32,261 --> 00:06:33,784
My face hurts.
117
00:06:33,828 --> 00:06:34,829
You whine too much.
118
00:06:34,872 --> 00:06:37,745
He hit me in the
face with a sword!
119
00:06:37,788 --> 00:06:40,965
I was there. You don't hear
me complaining about it.
120
00:06:41,009 --> 00:06:43,794
Nice mask, Dan. Hey-Chris,
are you okay?
121
00:06:43,838 --> 00:06:47,015
Oh, my gosh! What happened
to your face?
122
00:06:47,058 --> 00:06:49,757
Some actor whipped me
with his fencing foil.
123
00:06:49,800 --> 00:06:51,889
It's technically
called an epee.
124
00:06:51,933 --> 00:06:54,588
I tell you so you don't
look stupid for next time.
125
00:06:54,631 --> 00:06:57,939
After all the times we've
gone to see their plays...
126
00:06:57,982 --> 00:07:00,420
And you just let this happen,
Dan?
127
00:07:00,463 --> 00:07:01,986
Hold on! It wasn't me,
128
00:07:02,030 --> 00:07:03,945
it was some jerk named Ty.
129
00:07:03,988 --> 00:07:06,991
An actor? They wear makeup!
130
00:07:07,035 --> 00:07:10,865
He had a sword! You
saw what he did to Chris!
131
00:07:10,908 --> 00:07:13,084
You weren't there! You don't
know what it was like!
132
00:07:13,128 --> 00:07:14,869
At the dinner theatre.
133
00:07:14,912 --> 00:07:19,003
There's a lot of shame and rage
packed into those tights.
134
00:07:19,047 --> 00:07:20,657
I guess I have to do
everything myself.
135
00:07:20,701 --> 00:07:23,965
Nobody beats my
husband with an epee.
136
00:07:24,008 --> 00:07:26,576
See? Epee.
137
00:07:26,620 --> 00:07:28,796
You two wait here.
138
00:07:28,839 --> 00:07:31,102
Why is everyone
wearing masks today?
139
00:07:31,146 --> 00:07:32,626
Did I miss an email
or something?
140
00:07:32,669 --> 00:07:38,806
I still say there 's no way
you'll be able to get in.
141
00:07:38,849 --> 00:07:41,417
Hey! Where'd she
go?
142
00:07:49,904 --> 00:07:52,384
Uh, you're not supposed
to be in here.
143
00:07:52,428 --> 00:07:54,212
And who's going to stop me?
144
00:07:54,256 --> 00:07:55,257
We are!
145
00:07:59,479 --> 00:08:02,873
Once Elise is done, she'll
let me in, and then I can go
146
00:08:02,917 --> 00:08:06,007
about my plan of bringing
down the theatre by taking
147
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:11,229
out the actors. Muah, ha,
ha!
148
00:08:11,273 --> 00:08:14,015
So, seriously - why are you
still wearing that mask?
149
00:08:14,058 --> 00:08:16,800
Helps me focus.
Plus, I like it.
150
00:08:16,844 --> 00:08:18,933
Besides, shut up.
151
00:08:18,976 --> 00:08:25,505
Chi-Chawwww - Ah, Ty, you
make a very handsome woman.
152
00:08:25,548 --> 00:08:26,462
You.
153
00:08:26,506 --> 00:08:28,812
Ahh! It's - uh, for a role.
154
00:08:28,856 --> 00:08:30,597
Why I'm dressed as a woman...
155
00:08:30,640 --> 00:08:32,424
I'm a fan of your work, Ty.
156
00:08:32,468 --> 00:08:35,166
Your SWORD work. That
guy you whipped across
157
00:08:35,210 --> 00:08:37,604
the face? He's mine.
158
00:08:37,647 --> 00:08:39,040
Security?!
159
00:08:39,083 --> 00:08:45,046
Oh they're a bit "bound and
gagged" at the moment.
160
00:08:45,089 --> 00:08:47,352
Get back! Back, I say!
161
00:08:47,396 --> 00:08:49,485
Or I'll smite you!
162
00:08:49,529 --> 00:08:51,618
I've been training with bladed
weapons since I was seven,
163
00:08:51,661 --> 00:08:54,969
but okay give it
your best shot.
164
00:08:55,012 --> 00:08:57,101
AHHHHH!
165
00:08:57,145 --> 00:09:05,109
Ow! Hey that hurt! Help
Security!
166
00:09:05,153 --> 00:09:06,981
Well, that's the end of that.
167
00:09:07,024 --> 00:09:08,548
What did you do?
168
00:09:08,591 --> 00:09:10,332
You're probably in better legal
shape if I don't tell you.
169
00:09:10,375 --> 00:09:11,768
Okay, fair enough.
170
00:09:11,812 --> 00:09:14,249
I made this map for you.
It's complete with diagrams
171
00:09:14,292 --> 00:09:15,598
of the service
tunnels, air ducts,
172
00:09:15,642 --> 00:09:17,687
electrical, plumbing,
structural, everything.
173
00:09:17,731 --> 00:09:19,036
Phone lines?
174
00:09:19,080 --> 00:09:20,951
Uh, no.
175
00:09:20,995 --> 00:09:23,606
Ah Well, It'll have to do.
176
00:09:23,650 --> 00:09:25,173
You coming?
177
00:09:25,216 --> 00:09:28,524
Naw, I think I'll go home.
Give my face a chance to heal.
178
00:09:28,568 --> 00:09:33,442
Typical. Go on, then.
Elise thank you.
179
00:09:33,485 --> 00:09:36,097
I was never here.
180
00:09:42,973 --> 00:09:46,629
Hey, Ty and I were gonna
hit some mini-golf.
181
00:09:46,673 --> 00:09:48,109
You want to join us?
182
00:09:48,152 --> 00:09:49,937
Oh, thanks, but I can't.
183
00:09:49,980 --> 00:09:51,939
They said it looks like
rain today.
184
00:09:51,982 --> 00:09:53,070
So?
185
00:09:53,114 --> 00:09:54,985
So, I had ear surgery
last year, and
186
00:09:55,029 --> 00:09:58,032
I can't get my ears wet. Ever.
187
00:09:58,075 --> 00:10:00,730
Yeah? That's weird.
188
00:10:00,774 --> 00:10:03,167
Well, call me if you
change your mind.
189
00:10:03,211 --> 00:10:07,650
I'm pretty beat. I think
I'll take a nap instead.
190
00:10:07,694 --> 00:10:10,784
Okay. You want the rest
of this?
191
00:10:10,827 --> 00:10:13,787
Why would I want the
rest of your soda?
192
00:10:13,830 --> 00:10:20,707
I'll leave it here, ya
know, jus-just in case.
193
00:10:22,186 --> 00:10:25,537
The time is nigh.
194
00:10:25,581 --> 00:10:28,453
But soft, my conscience stirs.
195
00:10:28,497 --> 00:10:29,280
Eh.
196
00:10:33,110 --> 00:10:33,981
AAuauuughhhh!
197
00:10:34,024 --> 00:10:38,638
The foaming! It's so horrible!
198
00:10:38,681 --> 00:10:40,596
The foam!
199
00:10:45,601 --> 00:10:49,997
Whew. That's got to be the
worst case of soda-ear that
200
00:10:50,040 --> 00:10:51,694
I have ever seen.
201
00:10:51,738 --> 00:10:53,391
I guess you're Hamlet now.
202
00:10:53,435 --> 00:10:57,961
I wanted it, it's true.
But not like this.
203
00:10:58,005 --> 00:11:00,007
No, not like this.
204
00:11:00,050 --> 00:11:04,751
And who will play Laertes?
We're short-staffed as it is.
205
00:11:04,794 --> 00:11:09,059
I mean, sure, it's more
stage time for me...
206
00:11:09,103 --> 00:11:13,020
It's working.
207
00:11:14,630 --> 00:11:20,636
More actors must meet their
untimely fates. Ooh! Capes.
208
00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:26,207
Ah, ha!
No, this one's wrong.
209
00:11:28,122 --> 00:11:34,432
Ah! You stupid stuffed mule,
you nearly stopped my heart!
210
00:11:38,436 --> 00:11:40,134
Hmm...
211
00:11:40,177 --> 00:11:41,526
Lightbulb.
212
00:11:44,268 --> 00:11:51,188
Wow! At last, I'm Hamlet!
I need a whole new sword.
213
00:11:51,232 --> 00:11:53,843
"Hamlet-y" enough...
214
00:11:53,887 --> 00:12:01,111
too "Pirate-y"... Uh - yeah!
Mmph! Mmmph! Frmnmsnmfnnsm!
215
00:12:01,155 --> 00:12:05,202
I'm sorry, what was
that? I can't hear you.
216
00:12:05,246 --> 00:12:08,292
I didn't make a mouth-hole.
217
00:12:10,512 --> 00:12:13,297
Or eye holes. Ouch.
218
00:12:17,345 --> 00:12:19,260
Mmph hrmph mmmph!
219
00:12:19,303 --> 00:12:22,263
It's all right, son.
You're going to be fine.
220
00:12:22,306 --> 00:12:25,483
I just don't see how this
could happen.
221
00:12:25,527 --> 00:12:26,571
No?
222
00:12:26,615 --> 00:12:28,878
Well I've seen it a million
times.
223
00:12:28,922 --> 00:12:32,099
Kids get crazy, glue
stuff to themselves...
224
00:12:32,142 --> 00:12:34,623
That makes the third
such strange occurrence
225
00:12:34,666 --> 00:12:35,842
since this morning.
226
00:12:35,885 --> 00:12:38,061
Really? I count two.
227
00:12:38,105 --> 00:12:40,368
Plus Ty, who disappeared.
228
00:12:40,411 --> 00:12:44,024
That's right. You're
down to a single actor.
229
00:12:44,067 --> 00:12:48,506
You'll have to cancel the show.
230
00:12:48,550 --> 00:12:52,684
Vengeance is mine!
Ha, ha!
231
00:12:52,728 --> 00:12:54,382
Did you hear something?
232
00:12:54,425 --> 00:12:56,732
Only my adoring fans.
233
00:12:56,776 --> 00:12:58,429
So, I'm Hamlet, now?
234
00:12:58,473 --> 00:12:59,779
You're everybody now.
235
00:12:59,822 --> 00:13:03,695
You're right, I am! A
one-man show of Hamlet,
236
00:13:03,739 --> 00:13:06,524
with me as the star!
237
00:13:06,568 --> 00:13:08,918
I need to go throw up
and then run my lines.
238
00:13:11,399 --> 00:13:12,269
The show's still on?!
239
00:13:12,313 --> 00:13:14,228
With one actor?
240
00:13:14,271 --> 00:13:16,752
These guys are unstoppable!
241
00:13:16,796 --> 00:13:23,106
I guess there's only one
solution. Incite. A. Riot.
242
00:13:23,890 --> 00:13:25,674
Stay out of the air, .
243
00:13:25,717 --> 00:13:31,854
Ahh, Gross. You just
cut my guy in half!
244
00:13:31,898 --> 00:13:33,160
Did you get the mail today?
245
00:13:33,203 --> 00:13:34,335
I did.
246
00:13:34,378 --> 00:13:36,424
We got some bills,
a lot of junk...
247
00:13:36,467 --> 00:13:38,818
Oh, and an invitation
came from Dan!
248
00:13:38,861 --> 00:13:39,819
Dan?
249
00:13:39,862 --> 00:13:41,385
Yeah, it's postmarked.
250
00:13:41,429 --> 00:13:43,605
It was delivered by an
actual mailman.
251
00:13:43,648 --> 00:13:46,738
Weird. What did
he invite us to?
252
00:13:46,782 --> 00:13:49,959
A play. Tonight's opening
night of Hamlet.
253
00:13:50,003 --> 00:13:51,221
Let me guess where.
254
00:13:51,265 --> 00:13:52,657
Yeah, the dinner theatre.
255
00:13:52,701 --> 00:13:55,878
Of course. What's this, Dan
wrote right here?
256
00:13:55,922 --> 00:13:57,140
His penmanship is horrible.
257
00:13:57,184 --> 00:14:01,449
"Surprise appearance by the Mata
Hari?"
258
00:14:01,492 --> 00:14:04,147
No, it says, "With a
surprise appearance,"
259
00:14:04,191 --> 00:14:07,020
then he wrote "Muah, ha, ha!"
260
00:14:07,063 --> 00:14:10,632
I gotta admit, I have
some morbid curiosity
261
00:14:10,675 --> 00:14:11,981
about what he's up to.
262
00:14:12,025 --> 00:14:14,157
You want to go? It
Is date night.
263
00:14:14,201 --> 00:14:15,463
I don't know.
264
00:14:15,506 --> 00:14:17,682
I mean, what if the guy
who whipped me is there?
265
00:14:17,726 --> 00:14:19,815
I guarantee you won't run
into him.
266
00:14:19,859 --> 00:14:20,860
How do you know?
267
00:14:20,903 --> 00:14:22,600
Well, let's just
call it a hunch.
268
00:14:22,644 --> 00:14:25,777
A solid, "that-guy's-bound-and
d-gagged -on-a-f reighter-
269
00:14:25,821 --> 00:14:27,867
headed-for-Guatemal a" hunch.
270
00:14:27,910 --> 00:14:28,998
You want to get
eviscerated again?
271
00:14:29,042 --> 00:14:30,782
Why not?
272
00:14:32,132 --> 00:14:33,785
Be honest, how bad does
my face look, really?
273
00:14:33,829 --> 00:14:36,963
It's fine. You can't even
see the mark anymore.
274
00:14:37,006 --> 00:14:38,747
Oh, good.
275
00:14:38,790 --> 00:14:40,531
We've had some
changes in the cast.
276
00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:43,534
Hamlet will be a
one-man show tonight.
277
00:14:43,578 --> 00:14:45,145
Ah! Dude, your face!
I'm gonna throw up.
278
00:14:45,188 --> 00:14:49,801
I'm gonna look like
this forever.
279
00:14:49,845 --> 00:14:53,805
Hey, Chris ! Over here!
I need your help!
280
00:14:53,849 --> 00:14:56,678
I'll get us seats.
281
00:15:03,903 --> 00:15:06,166
Could you walk any slower?
282
00:15:06,209 --> 00:15:08,864
Probably. Is there something
I can help you with?
283
00:15:08,908 --> 00:15:12,215
Of course! Wait here
precisely seven minutes.
284
00:15:12,259 --> 00:15:16,045
Then? Set fire to this
pile of trash right here.
285
00:15:16,089 --> 00:15:18,743
I'm not committing
arson on my date.
286
00:15:18,787 --> 00:15:21,877
It's not a date. You're
with your wife.
287
00:15:21,921 --> 00:15:25,533
Besides, I need a
distraction for my plan!
288
00:15:25,576 --> 00:15:27,665
I'll think of something
else, all right?
289
00:15:27,709 --> 00:15:30,886
Give me exactly seven minutes.
290
00:15:30,930 --> 00:15:34,020
And it is a date!
It's date night!
291
00:15:34,063 --> 00:15:36,022
You sicken me!
292
00:15:36,065 --> 00:15:38,633
Oh bubble, bubble,
toil and-
293
00:15:38,676 --> 00:15:42,854
Dude? You do that
every time. Stop it.
294
00:15:42,898 --> 00:15:44,682
Look at that! I
can't believe it!
295
00:15:44,726 --> 00:15:47,468
Wow! That's got to be the
most distracting thing
296
00:15:47,511 --> 00:15:54,910
I've ever seen! It's huge!
Enormous! Distracting!
297
00:15:54,954 --> 00:15:56,042
You want to check it out?
298
00:15:56,085 --> 00:16:05,312
Why not?
299
00:16:05,355 --> 00:16:09,577
Clockwork.
300
00:16:12,362 --> 00:16:14,974
The food's pretty bad
without my help, but even
301
00:16:15,017 --> 00:16:19,543
the most leathery palate
will balk at soap soup!
302
00:16:19,587 --> 00:16:23,983
Just to make sure...
Bleagh!
303
00:16:24,026 --> 00:16:29,292
Ew! Pthh! Perfect!
304
00:16:29,336 --> 00:16:30,163
Hey - What's going on?
305
00:16:30,206 --> 00:16:32,817
You missed it. Never mind.
306
00:16:34,689 --> 00:16:36,996
Well, what a waste of time
that was.
307
00:16:37,039 --> 00:16:39,302
Yeah, that wasn't
distracting at all.
308
00:16:39,346 --> 00:16:42,784
Um - you think that we
should taste the stew?
309
00:16:42,827 --> 00:16:44,394
We tasted it before we left.
310
00:16:44,438 --> 00:16:47,267
What could have happened
in the last two minutes?
311
00:16:55,101 --> 00:17:00,062
Pthh-ugh! Dan, must have
tampered with the food.
312
00:17:00,106 --> 00:17:01,498
It's inedible.
313
00:17:01,542 --> 00:17:06,677
You're right, it's really bad.
314
00:17:06,721 --> 00:17:09,071
We of the Shakespeare
Dinner Theatre
315
00:17:09,115 --> 00:17:12,640
would like to thank
you all for...
316
00:17:12,683 --> 00:17:14,903
Hey, guys... Check it out.
317
00:17:14,946 --> 00:17:22,171
Riot in three, two,
one...
318
00:17:22,215 --> 00:17:25,218
Oh, come on! You people
are eating soap!
319
00:17:32,834 --> 00:17:35,663
Excuse me, sir-
320
00:17:35,706 --> 00:17:38,753
Excuse yourself, you hack!
321
00:17:38,796 --> 00:17:42,148
I'll say my piece before
you take the stage.
322
00:17:42,191 --> 00:17:46,326
You canteth be up here!
Get thee thither, anon!
323
00:17:46,369 --> 00:17:47,631
Canteth?
324
00:17:47,675 --> 00:17:51,461
This guy doesn't even
know what he's saying!
325
00:17:51,505 --> 00:17:53,376
Sir if thou doesn't
get off my stage,
326
00:17:53,420 --> 00:17:54,899
I shall be forced to---
327
00:17:54,943 --> 00:17:58,077
To what? Subject us to bad
theater and even worse food?
328
00:17:58,120 --> 00:18:04,648
Don't sayeth I
didn't warn thou!
329
00:18:04,692 --> 00:18:07,434
Is it weird that I'm
kinda rooting for Dan now?
330
00:18:07,477 --> 00:18:12,047
My stomach hurts, but I feel
clean inside.
331
00:18:12,091 --> 00:18:13,527
Have at thou!
332
00:18:13,570 --> 00:18:17,357
It's "Have at THEE," you
be-slubbering canker-blossom!
333
00:18:23,450 --> 00:18:26,148
It's an actor's job
to communicate
334
00:18:26,192 --> 00:18:28,150
the material to the audience.
335
00:18:28,194 --> 00:18:31,110
How can you do that when
you don't even know what
336
00:18:31,153 --> 00:18:34,243
the lines mean?
337
00:18:34,287 --> 00:18:37,420
He's right! I haven't
understood a word he's said,
338
00:18:37,464 --> 00:18:41,859
and I translated Hamlet into
Esperanto for my senior thesis!
339
00:18:41,903 --> 00:18:42,947
You did?
340
00:18:42,991 --> 00:18:44,732
No. I'm just helping Dan out.
341
00:18:44,775 --> 00:18:48,257
Is it me or have you been
acting really weird this week?
342
00:18:48,301 --> 00:18:49,954
It's you.
343
00:18:49,998 --> 00:18:52,696
I do so know what
the lines mean!
344
00:18:52,740 --> 00:18:56,004
Liar! Blackguard! Varlot!
345
00:19:04,708 --> 00:19:08,234
How dare you interrupith my
moment in the spotlight?!
346
00:19:08,277 --> 00:19:11,280
How dare you serve
us such awful food?
347
00:19:11,324 --> 00:19:18,722
Am I right?
348
00:19:18,766 --> 00:19:27,601
I have thee now!
349
00:19:27,644 --> 00:19:33,215
How's that for a taste of
your own indigestable dreck?
350
00:19:33,259 --> 00:19:37,045
Am I the only one who feels
cheated by these charlatans?
351
00:19:37,088 --> 00:19:40,135
Are we going to sit here
complacently while they
352
00:19:40,179 --> 00:19:43,007
treat us like
ratcatching rabble?
353
00:19:44,183 --> 00:19:46,489
I think not!
354
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:48,317
That's enoughith!
355
00:19:48,361 --> 00:19:52,626
Rise up, and we'll send a
message that we will not
356
00:19:52,669 --> 00:19:54,236
be treated thusly!
357
00:19:54,280 --> 00:19:57,239
Come on! Let's get this guy!
358
00:19:57,283 --> 00:20:04,942
Rise up, I say, and stab
him with your spoons!
359
00:20:04,986 --> 00:20:10,165
Please, someone helpeth me!
The audience is mad!
360
00:20:10,209 --> 00:20:13,299
Ow! Stopeth! Hey! That
hurtith a little bit!
361
00:20:13,342 --> 00:20:16,432
And by the way, your
acting's really bad.
362
00:20:16,476 --> 00:20:18,173
Ow! Knock it off!
363
00:20:18,217 --> 00:20:24,135
I've had enough! I QUIT!
364
00:20:24,179 --> 00:20:29,489
I win. At last, sweet
victory is mine!
365
00:20:29,532 --> 00:20:31,926
We'd better go. The
crowd is turning mean.
366
00:20:31,969 --> 00:20:36,365
Uh, oh. Uh... Fire.
367
00:20:36,409 --> 00:20:40,630
Bye, Dan! Place is on
fire. Great show!
368
00:20:40,674 --> 00:20:42,371
Who would have thought
an angry mob could
369
00:20:42,415 --> 00:20:44,591
get so out of hand?
370
00:20:50,423 --> 00:20:52,947
Good night, sweet
Shakespeare dinner theatre.
371
00:20:52,990 --> 00:20:58,431
May flights of angels
sing thee to thy rest.
372
00:20:58,474 --> 00:21:00,650
Muah-ha hahahah!
373
00:21:00,694 --> 00:21:04,350
I've made you cry, your
theatre is burnt.
374
00:21:04,393 --> 00:21:07,614
It lies in ruin, plain
for all to see.
375
00:21:07,657 --> 00:21:11,226
And now it seems, your
lesson has been learnt.
376
00:21:11,270 --> 00:21:18,102
That should teach you not to
mess with Dan.
377
00:21:18,146 --> 00:21:20,148
Oh, come on!
27300
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