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Another horrible day, made
slightly better with cookies
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00:00:25,025 --> 00:00:27,766
and special, lactose-free milk.
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00:00:36,079 --> 00:00:40,736
Ptooey! Yuck! Dry,
and unsatisfying!
4
00:00:40,779 --> 00:00:43,304
Take that!
5
00:00:43,347 --> 00:00:44,740
Ah! Hey!
6
00:00:44,783 --> 00:00:46,307
What the-
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00:00:46,350 --> 00:00:49,788
Um, drinking problem much?
8
00:00:49,832 --> 00:00:52,791
There wasn't even a
verb in that sentence!
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00:00:52,835 --> 00:00:55,403
Just a lousy gerund.
10
00:00:55,446 --> 00:01:00,277
Where did that throwing
star come from?!
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00:01:00,321 --> 00:01:04,368
Oh, well, at least I
still have my cookies.
12
00:01:04,412 --> 00:01:07,241
I can't believe this!
13
00:01:11,549 --> 00:01:15,075
NIIIIINNNNJAAAAA!!!
14
00:01:23,257 --> 00:01:28,131
Breakfast time, one of the
most wonderful times...
15
00:01:28,175 --> 00:01:29,045
Morning, Dan.
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00:01:29,089 --> 00:01:30,002
Is it?
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00:01:30,046 --> 00:01:31,439
Is it... morning?
18
00:01:31,482 --> 00:01:33,702
I was attacked by a
ninja last night.
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00:01:33,745 --> 00:01:34,920
Make me some pancakes.
20
00:01:34,964 --> 00:01:36,096
A ninja?
21
00:01:36,139 --> 00:01:37,445
Pancakes!
22
00:01:37,488 --> 00:01:39,142
Are you sure it
was a ninja?
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00:01:39,186 --> 00:01:41,884
Of course! He stole my
cookies and exploded my
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00:01:41,927 --> 00:01:43,581
lactose-free milk.
25
00:01:43,625 --> 00:01:44,800
Do ninjas do that?
26
00:01:44,843 --> 00:01:45,714
This one did.
27
00:01:45,757 --> 00:01:47,368
But how do you know it was a-
28
00:01:47,411 --> 00:01:49,674
He was in pajamas.
29
00:01:49,718 --> 00:01:51,633
I'm in pajamas. Does
that make me a ninja?
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00:01:51,676 --> 00:01:55,202
Not feety pajamas!
Ninja pajamas!
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00:01:55,245 --> 00:01:56,768
Plus, I didn't see
him.
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00:01:56,812 --> 00:01:58,683
Ergo, ninja.
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00:01:58,727 --> 00:02:04,036
If you didn't see him, how do
you know he was in pajamas?
34
00:02:04,080 --> 00:02:05,690
Hey! Not cool!
35
00:02:05,734 --> 00:02:08,606
What's not cool is that you're
trying to confound me with your
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00:02:08,650 --> 00:02:12,697
stupid logic, when what I
need is help with a problem.
37
00:02:12,741 --> 00:02:14,525
I don't break YOUR
plates...
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00:02:14,569 --> 00:02:15,874
Do I smell pancakes?
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00:02:15,918 --> 00:02:17,267
Almost ready.
40
00:02:17,311 --> 00:02:18,747
I get mine first.
41
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:20,314
Hi, Dan. You're up early.
42
00:02:20,357 --> 00:02:22,185
I was attacked by a
ninja last night.
43
00:02:22,229 --> 00:02:23,665
He stole my cookies.
44
00:02:23,708 --> 00:02:25,145
I'm sure it wasn't a ninja.
45
00:02:25,188 --> 00:02:29,540
You too?! If it wasn't a
ninja, where'd I get this?
46
00:02:29,584 --> 00:02:31,716
My table!
47
00:02:31,760 --> 00:02:33,979
Now tell me it's
not a ninja.
48
00:02:34,023 --> 00:02:36,939
The Koshugi Clan... But
how did they find me?
49
00:02:36,982 --> 00:02:38,027
What was that?
50
00:02:38,070 --> 00:02:40,769
Uh, nothing. I, uh, I have to
go.
51
00:02:40,812 --> 00:02:42,466
Dan, we'll help you
with your problem.
52
00:02:42,510 --> 00:02:44,294
Finally, a voice of reason.
53
00:02:44,338 --> 00:02:46,209
Why can't you be helpful like
her?
54
00:02:46,253 --> 00:02:47,602
What?! I'm always help-
55
00:02:47,645 --> 00:02:49,169
Up-bup-bup.
56
00:02:49,212 --> 00:02:50,213
It's probably a good idea if
you guys wait here, with the
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00:02:50,257 --> 00:02:52,955
doors locked and
the shades drawn.
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00:02:52,998 --> 00:02:58,134
And don't answer the door.
For anyone.
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00:02:58,178 --> 00:03:00,441
Did you notice anything
strange right there?
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00:03:00,484 --> 00:03:03,095
You mean that I still have no
pancakes in front of me?!
61
00:03:03,139 --> 00:03:05,010
Elise was acting funny.
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00:03:05,054 --> 00:03:07,099
I told you not to get
married.
63
00:03:18,981 --> 00:03:21,288
And another reason you shouldn't
have gotten married...
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00:03:21,331 --> 00:03:22,767
Can we just drop it?
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00:03:22,811 --> 00:03:26,771
No, this has to be said. Your
pancakes have suffered.
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00:03:26,815 --> 00:03:29,252
I'll get it.
67
00:03:36,651 --> 00:03:37,782
What did I tell you?!
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00:03:37,826 --> 00:03:39,480
Pants first then shoes!
69
00:03:39,523 --> 00:03:40,959
I told you not to get the
door.
70
00:03:41,003 --> 00:03:41,917
But it was you.
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00:03:41,960 --> 00:03:43,614
Or so you thought.
72
00:03:43,658 --> 00:03:45,050
Wait, what?
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00:03:45,094 --> 00:03:46,661
Nice sword.
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00:03:46,704 --> 00:03:47,836
Thank you.
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00:03:47,879 --> 00:03:49,664
Now take me to where you saw the
ninja.
76
00:03:52,449 --> 00:03:54,625
So, I'm confused.
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00:03:54,669 --> 00:03:55,757
As always.
78
00:03:55,800 --> 00:03:57,585
You believe in ninjas now?
79
00:03:57,628 --> 00:03:59,456
What makes you think I didn't
believe in them before?
80
00:03:59,500 --> 00:04:01,284
Yeah, you shouldn't assume.
81
00:04:01,328 --> 00:04:04,374
When Dan said he was attacked by
a ninja, you were skeptical.
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00:04:04,418 --> 00:04:06,724
If Dan said he was attacked by
a tiger, I'd be skeptical.
83
00:04:06,768 --> 00:04:08,683
Doesn't mean I don't
believe in tigers.
84
00:04:08,726 --> 00:04:10,032
Another excellent point.
85
00:04:10,075 --> 00:04:11,555
She's kicking your butt, Chris.
86
00:04:11,599 --> 00:04:13,470
It's not a competition, Dan.
87
00:04:13,514 --> 00:04:15,646
But if it were,
she'd be winning.
88
00:04:15,690 --> 00:04:17,779
These tracks indicate
a split-toe sock,
89
00:04:17,822 --> 00:04:19,476
with climbing spikes
on the bottom.
90
00:04:19,520 --> 00:04:22,305
Also, the throwing star, or
"shuriken..."
91
00:04:22,349 --> 00:04:23,567
"Shuriken".
92
00:04:23,611 --> 00:04:25,482
I'd say you got yourself a
ninja problem.
93
00:04:25,526 --> 00:04:26,353
I knew it!
94
00:04:26,396 --> 00:04:28,050
Looks like the Koshugi Clan.
95
00:04:28,093 --> 00:04:29,704
The whatso-hoozits?
96
00:04:29,747 --> 00:04:32,272
A ninja family that has lived
in the shadows for centuries.
97
00:04:32,315 --> 00:04:33,925
The story takes place in...
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00:04:33,969 --> 00:04:36,319
Japan, several
hundred years ago.
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00:04:36,363 --> 00:04:40,105
A man named Jiro Koshugi
lived a life of peace.
100
00:04:40,149 --> 00:04:42,586
Jiro was good at two things.
101
00:04:42,630 --> 00:04:43,631
Hiding...
102
00:04:49,419 --> 00:04:50,855
...and making
cookies.
103
00:04:50,899 --> 00:04:54,816
Oh! Wait a minute... This guy
doesn't make cookies.
104
00:04:54,859 --> 00:04:57,035
This guy steals cookies!
105
00:04:57,079 --> 00:04:58,689
I'm getting to that.
106
00:04:58,733 --> 00:05:00,256
You may proceed.
107
00:05:01,518 --> 00:05:03,868
During the chaos of
the Sengoku period,
108
00:05:03,912 --> 00:05:09,787
military conflict between
rival factions was constant.
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00:05:34,246 --> 00:05:36,727
It was in one of these battles
that Jiro's cookie shop was
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00:05:36,771 --> 00:05:38,381
burned to the ground.
111
00:05:38,425 --> 00:05:44,387
My... my cookie shop! Why!?
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00:05:46,955 --> 00:05:49,523
He dedicated his
life to revenge.
113
00:05:49,566 --> 00:05:50,785
I guess he's not all
bad.
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00:05:50,828 --> 00:05:53,527
They say he never baked again.
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00:05:53,570 --> 00:05:58,662
Instead... He became the most
feared assassin in the land.
116
00:05:58,706 --> 00:06:01,970
He was called shinobi-no-mono.
117
00:06:02,013 --> 00:06:03,972
Stop making up words.
118
00:06:04,015 --> 00:06:06,104
It means, "One who
steals away."
119
00:06:06,148 --> 00:06:10,195
We call them the ninja.
120
00:06:10,239 --> 00:06:12,937
Soon other dispossessed
dessert makers joined him,
121
00:06:12,981 --> 00:06:16,419
and he trained them in
the art of ninjitsu.
122
00:06:16,463 --> 00:06:18,943
So why did this guy
gank my cookies?
123
00:06:18,987 --> 00:06:21,816
I told you, Jiro stopped
making cookies for himself.
124
00:06:21,859 --> 00:06:24,035
And his clan followed
in his footsteps.
125
00:06:24,079 --> 00:06:27,299
They've taken an oath, never
to make sweets of their own.
126
00:06:27,343 --> 00:06:28,866
So they have to steal them?!
127
00:06:28,910 --> 00:06:30,259
I'm afraid so.
128
00:06:30,302 --> 00:06:31,782
Man, I hate me some ninjas...
129
00:06:31,826 --> 00:06:33,523
Can I ask a question?
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00:06:33,567 --> 00:06:34,959
If you must.
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00:06:35,003 --> 00:06:37,484
How do you know so much about
this stuff?
132
00:06:37,527 --> 00:06:41,836
No reason. I see a
lot of ninja movies.
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00:06:41,879 --> 00:06:43,098
And the katana?
134
00:06:43,141 --> 00:06:45,448
It's not actually a
katana, it's a ninja-to.
135
00:06:45,492 --> 00:06:49,147
Either way, I've never seen
you carry a sword before.
136
00:06:49,191 --> 00:06:50,975
I can carry a sword
when I want to.
137
00:06:51,019 --> 00:06:52,716
Yeah, Chris. Second Amendment.
138
00:06:52,760 --> 00:06:54,805
Okay, I'm not saying you
can't carry a sword.
139
00:06:54,849 --> 00:06:56,459
I'm just saying
it's new behavior.
140
00:06:56,503 --> 00:06:58,418
Combined with the fact that
you seem to have knowledge
141
00:06:58,461 --> 00:07:01,464
that relates directly to the
situation we find ourselves in,
142
00:07:01,508 --> 00:07:04,032
I think an explanation
is in order.
143
00:07:04,075 --> 00:07:07,775
Wow. That's the most I've ever
heard you say at one time.
144
00:07:07,818 --> 00:07:11,561
That's because you never ask
about my tomato garden.
145
00:07:11,605 --> 00:07:12,954
Well?
146
00:07:12,997 --> 00:07:14,825
Ok! You know I had a life
before we met, right?
147
00:07:14,869 --> 00:07:16,044
Uh, huh.
148
00:07:16,087 --> 00:07:18,133
Well, this isn't
just any throwing star.
149
00:07:18,176 --> 00:07:21,179
That's right. It belongs
to the Koshugi Clan.
150
00:07:21,223 --> 00:07:22,746
See? I listen.
151
00:07:22,790 --> 00:07:25,619
It's the ninja clan I ran afoul
of when I lived in Japan.
152
00:07:25,662 --> 00:07:27,185
So this is your fault?!
153
00:07:27,229 --> 00:07:29,405
My cookies are gone
because of you?
154
00:07:29,449 --> 00:07:32,452
I don't know. If they
knew where I was,
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00:07:32,495 --> 00:07:34,889
they would have
attacked me directly.
156
00:07:34,932 --> 00:07:38,370
Regrettably, you're involved
now, and the ninja's next step
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00:07:38,414 --> 00:07:40,285
will likely be to kill you.
158
00:07:40,329 --> 00:07:43,463
KILL me? Over my dead body!
159
00:07:43,506 --> 00:07:46,466
Wait... How did you "run afoul"
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00:07:46,509 --> 00:07:49,077
of a ninja clan when
you were fourteen?
161
00:07:49,120 --> 00:07:53,908
Well, it was a long time ago,
and I long, long story...
162
00:07:53,951 --> 00:07:56,519
and I don't want
to talk about it.
163
00:07:56,563 --> 00:07:58,913
But I tell you
everything about me.
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00:07:58,956 --> 00:08:00,610
I know.
165
00:08:00,654 --> 00:08:02,177
Enough already!
166
00:08:02,220 --> 00:08:04,222
What's important is that we
find this ninja and make him
167
00:08:04,266 --> 00:08:05,485
buy me more cookies.
168
00:08:05,528 --> 00:08:06,007
But-
169
00:08:06,050 --> 00:08:07,399
Dan's right.
170
00:08:07,443 --> 00:08:08,792
We've got to do something
about this ninja before
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00:08:08,836 --> 00:08:09,924
he strikes again.
172
00:08:09,967 --> 00:08:11,491
We can't just wait around.
173
00:08:11,534 --> 00:08:14,450
Luckily, I have a plan.
174
00:08:17,105 --> 00:08:20,891
Elise... my ancient
and sworn enemy.
175
00:08:20,935 --> 00:08:23,981
What a fortuitous coincidence
that stealing the
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00:08:24,025 --> 00:08:28,638
angry little man's abominable
cookies would lead me to you.
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00:08:28,682 --> 00:08:33,121
Unfortunately for your
friends, they know too much.
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00:08:33,164 --> 00:08:36,951
Who eats cookies made without
butter anyway?!
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00:08:44,262 --> 00:08:46,656
Okay, come out and
let us take a look.
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00:08:46,700 --> 00:08:52,880
I don't know about this...
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00:08:52,923 --> 00:08:56,492
Oh, come on! He doesn't
look like me at all!
182
00:08:56,536 --> 00:08:57,798
Can you slouch a little?
183
00:08:57,841 --> 00:08:59,495
And be more handsome!
184
00:08:59,539 --> 00:09:01,889
I still don't get why
I'm dressing up as Dan.
185
00:09:01,932 --> 00:09:04,718
We told you, you're a Dan
decoy.
186
00:09:04,761 --> 00:09:06,023
Right, but why?
187
00:09:06,067 --> 00:09:07,808
To lure the ninja out of
hiding.
188
00:09:07,851 --> 00:09:09,026
When he attacks you-
189
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:10,811
Okay, and there's the part I
don't like.
190
00:09:10,854 --> 00:09:12,639
Well, we can't risk me, can we?
191
00:09:12,682 --> 00:09:14,684
I'm precious.
192
00:09:14,728 --> 00:09:16,512
What, and I'm expendable?
193
00:09:16,556 --> 00:09:18,775
Let's just say,
"non-vital." It's nicer.
194
00:09:18,819 --> 00:09:20,908
No! t's not that you're
expendable, Chris.
195
00:09:20,951 --> 00:09:23,388
It's that the next step will
be for the ninja to poison
196
00:09:23,432 --> 00:09:24,781
Dan somehow.
197
00:09:24,825 --> 00:09:28,742
And we're hoping he
poisons you instead.
198
00:09:28,785 --> 00:09:29,917
I keep coming back to the whole
199
00:09:29,960 --> 00:09:32,180
"not liking this
plan at all" thing.
200
00:09:32,223 --> 00:09:35,270
Look, we don't know how the
ninja will try and poison Dan.
201
00:09:35,313 --> 00:09:36,967
Maybe his food, maybe
something else.
202
00:09:37,011 --> 00:09:39,317
But what we do know is that
ninjas calibrate their
203
00:09:39,361 --> 00:09:40,797
poisons very carefully.
204
00:09:40,841 --> 00:09:43,017
And you're bigger than Dan.
205
00:09:43,060 --> 00:09:45,019
Because you keep eating.
206
00:09:45,062 --> 00:09:46,934
So, if the ninja
poisons you instead,
207
00:09:46,977 --> 00:09:48,849
you probably won't die.
208
00:09:48,892 --> 00:09:50,764
And you just said "probably."
209
00:09:50,807 --> 00:09:53,288
I'm almost positive.
210
00:09:53,331 --> 00:09:54,637
Oh! She's almost positive.
211
00:09:54,681 --> 00:09:55,943
Quit being a baby.
212
00:09:55,986 --> 00:09:56,944
Please?
213
00:09:56,987 --> 00:09:58,772
All right.
214
00:09:59,599 --> 00:10:02,906
Okay, now act like Dan.
215
00:10:02,950 --> 00:10:07,171
Hey! I'm Dan...
and I'm... angry!
216
00:10:07,215 --> 00:10:09,521
Very angry!
217
00:10:09,565 --> 00:10:10,174
Idiot.
218
00:10:10,218 --> 00:10:10,610
Dan!
219
00:10:10,653 --> 00:10:11,872
Shhh!
220
00:10:11,915 --> 00:10:14,701
He's doing it wrong! I
am much more suave,
221
00:10:14,744 --> 00:10:16,790
debonair, and
sophisticated than that!
222
00:10:16,833 --> 00:10:19,053
Yes, Dan, that's a very
debonair stain you
223
00:10:19,096 --> 00:10:20,271
have on your shirt.
224
00:10:20,315 --> 00:10:21,795
I'll have you know I
have sophistication
225
00:10:21,838 --> 00:10:22,839
coming out the wazoo!
226
00:10:22,883 --> 00:10:24,014
Yeah!
227
00:10:24,058 --> 00:10:26,582
I get mad at everything!
228
00:10:26,626 --> 00:10:28,236
And then I yell a lot!
229
00:10:28,279 --> 00:10:31,631
I sure don't appreciate
my friend Chris!
230
00:10:31,674 --> 00:10:34,155
Owwww!
231
00:10:34,198 --> 00:10:35,896
Get him!
232
00:10:37,985 --> 00:10:39,856
Hey, could I get a little help?
233
00:10:39,900 --> 00:10:41,858
I got this... dart
in my neck.
234
00:10:41,902 --> 00:10:44,905
Ow! Ow!
235
00:10:54,479 --> 00:10:56,612
Flying monkeys?!
236
00:10:56,656 --> 00:10:59,920
This time of year?
237
00:10:59,963 --> 00:11:02,183
Somebody call the
zoo!
238
00:11:02,226 --> 00:11:04,228
Why must you torment
me?
239
00:11:04,272 --> 00:11:07,014
Why can't you be
satisfied with flying.
240
00:11:07,057 --> 00:11:08,711
Help!! Someone.
241
00:11:08,755 --> 00:11:09,799
This is very confusing.
242
00:11:35,129 --> 00:11:35,912
Gotcha!
243
00:12:06,464 --> 00:12:09,206
Dan!? You
saved my life!
244
00:12:17,388 --> 00:12:20,000
He exploded! We won!
245
00:12:20,043 --> 00:12:22,002
He didn't explode. He escaped.
246
00:12:22,045 --> 00:12:24,831
Well, that's completely
unsatisfying.
247
00:12:31,968 --> 00:12:34,188
So I said, "They're not my
radishes.
248
00:12:34,231 --> 00:12:36,799
You're the one with your
left blinker on..."
249
00:12:36,843 --> 00:12:38,322
Chris?
250
00:12:38,366 --> 00:12:42,239
Oh, hey, Glendale. Ohhh!
251
00:12:48,811 --> 00:12:50,857
Man, this guy's heavy.
252
00:12:50,900 --> 00:12:52,162
Sorry.
253
00:12:52,206 --> 00:12:53,903
Ever think of skipping a meal
once in a while?
254
00:12:53,947 --> 00:12:55,600
Quit complaining, Dan.
255
00:12:55,644 --> 00:12:56,950
Oh! Sure, you can say that.
256
00:12:56,993 --> 00:12:58,255
You've got the light end.
257
00:12:58,299 --> 00:12:59,996
Chris doesn't have
a "light end."
258
00:13:00,040 --> 00:13:02,085
Hold him up so I can open
the door.
259
00:13:02,129 --> 00:13:02,912
No problem.
260
00:13:02,956 --> 00:13:04,784
Oof! Heavy!
261
00:13:04,827 --> 00:13:05,523
What's this?
262
00:13:05,567 --> 00:13:08,788
What's what?
263
00:13:09,919 --> 00:13:12,835
"Shinobi-no-mono-wa kanarasu
katsu."
264
00:13:12,879 --> 00:13:15,838
It's gibberish! The
ninja's toying with us!
265
00:13:15,882 --> 00:13:17,231
It's not gibberish.
It's Japanese.
266
00:13:17,274 --> 00:13:19,059
This is a formal challenge.
267
00:13:19,102 --> 00:13:21,713
Like, who looks better
in evening wear?
268
00:13:21,757 --> 00:13:25,065
"Like", single combat
to the death.
269
00:13:25,108 --> 00:13:26,370
Oh.
270
00:13:26,414 --> 00:13:29,025
A duel will settle things
once and for all.
271
00:13:29,069 --> 00:13:31,549
If I win, the Koshugi Clan
will leave us alone.
272
00:13:31,593 --> 00:13:34,378
If I lose, I'll be dead.
273
00:13:34,422 --> 00:13:36,859
I'm willing to take that risk.
274
00:13:36,903 --> 00:13:37,991
Help me get Chris inside-
275
00:13:38,034 --> 00:13:40,167
Where's Chris?
276
00:13:40,210 --> 00:13:41,908
Bushes.
277
00:13:47,261 --> 00:13:48,262
Onto the couch.
278
00:13:48,305 --> 00:13:51,918
One, two, three!
279
00:13:51,961 --> 00:13:53,702
Hey, take it easy.
280
00:13:53,745 --> 00:13:55,182
So when do we leave?
281
00:13:55,225 --> 00:13:57,793
We? It's single
combat. One on one.
282
00:13:57,837 --> 00:13:59,360
I'll just watch.
283
00:13:59,403 --> 00:14:01,405
No. It's a sacred ritual. No
one is allowed to spectate.
284
00:14:01,449 --> 00:14:03,407
Could someone bring
me some water?
285
00:14:03,451 --> 00:14:04,278
Where is it?
286
00:14:04,321 --> 00:14:05,975
It's secret. You can't come.
287
00:14:06,019 --> 00:14:08,543
If you win, I get my
cookies back, right?
288
00:14:08,586 --> 00:14:10,414
I'm pretty sure your
cookies are gone.
289
00:14:10,458 --> 00:14:12,025
They've most likely
been eaten.
290
00:14:12,068 --> 00:14:14,027
By ninjas?
291
00:14:14,070 --> 00:14:14,897
Yes, Dan.
292
00:14:14,941 --> 00:14:17,030
But... that's not fair!
293
00:14:17,073 --> 00:14:18,118
Oh, my head...
294
00:14:18,161 --> 00:14:19,902
The Koshugi clan
doesn't play fair.
295
00:14:19,946 --> 00:14:22,209
They're ninjas. Assassins.
Spies.
296
00:14:22,252 --> 00:14:23,906
And cookie thieves?
297
00:14:23,950 --> 00:14:24,907
Yes.
298
00:14:24,951 --> 00:14:26,866
I hope you kill that guy.
299
00:14:26,909 --> 00:14:28,868
I will. Or die
trying.
300
00:14:28,911 --> 00:14:30,391
Either way.
301
00:14:30,434 --> 00:14:32,349
I just don't understand what
your blood feud has to do
302
00:14:32,393 --> 00:14:33,916
with my cookies.
303
00:14:33,960 --> 00:14:35,439
Nothing.
304
00:14:35,483 --> 00:14:36,788
The ninja was just stealing
your cookies to eat them.
305
00:14:36,832 --> 00:14:38,921
But when I showed up,
the feud was rekindled.
306
00:14:38,965 --> 00:14:40,531
Of course, since you were
already in the middle,
307
00:14:40,575 --> 00:14:42,664
you became a target.
308
00:14:42,707 --> 00:14:45,449
So if you die, will they still
come after me?
309
00:14:45,493 --> 00:14:48,278
Yes. I already told you,
you're involved now.
310
00:14:48,322 --> 00:14:51,020
And if I die, I can only
assume you'll be next.
311
00:14:51,064 --> 00:14:52,326
And then probably Chris.
312
00:14:52,369 --> 00:14:53,414
Well then I would
appreciate,
313
00:14:53,457 --> 00:14:55,938
as a favor to me, that
you not die.
314
00:14:55,982 --> 00:14:57,287
Okay Dan, for you.
315
00:14:57,331 --> 00:14:59,811
Hey it's not just about me!
316
00:14:59,855 --> 00:15:02,945
As long as that ninja's alive,
no one's cookies are safe.
317
00:15:02,989 --> 00:15:04,251
INCLUDING mine.
318
00:15:04,294 --> 00:15:07,036
Wait, what's this about combat?
319
00:15:07,080 --> 00:15:09,560
Never mind. Just get
some rest.
320
00:15:09,604 --> 00:15:11,040
Where am I?
321
00:15:11,084 --> 00:15:12,694
Will you stay here with
Chris?
322
00:15:12,737 --> 00:15:15,915
Of course.
323
00:15:15,958 --> 00:15:18,091
Eat anything you want in the
'fridge.
324
00:15:22,443 --> 00:15:26,142
Hey Chris, open wide.
325
00:15:26,186 --> 00:15:30,625
Here's a nice pastrami
sandwich for you.
326
00:15:30,668 --> 00:15:32,453
OWWWW!
327
00:15:32,496 --> 00:15:33,715
Stop it!
328
00:15:33,758 --> 00:15:35,021
Hey, where'd Elise
go?
329
00:15:35,064 --> 00:15:37,066
Shut up.
330
00:15:37,110 --> 00:15:38,850
Where are you going?
331
00:15:38,894 --> 00:15:40,417
Out.
332
00:15:40,461 --> 00:15:44,291
Can you bring me some- -water?
333
00:15:46,728 --> 00:15:48,991
I'm just so thirsty...
334
00:15:49,035 --> 00:15:52,560
Sir, it is illegal to dial
911 with a non-emergency.
335
00:15:52,603 --> 00:15:54,605
It feels like an emergency.
336
00:15:54,649 --> 00:15:58,783
Plus, there's still
those flying monkeys--
337
00:15:58,827 --> 00:16:02,135
Sir, unless the flying monkeys
are physically attacking you--
338
00:16:02,178 --> 00:16:03,527
- and I've been poisoned.
339
00:16:03,571 --> 00:16:04,354
Poisoned?
340
00:16:04,398 --> 00:16:05,921
That is an emergency, sir.
341
00:16:05,965 --> 00:16:08,358
Oh, good. Have them bring
water.
342
00:16:08,402 --> 00:16:12,928
Paramedics are on the way.
343
00:16:12,972 --> 00:16:15,975
Hey, guys...
344
00:16:16,018 --> 00:16:19,456
Yup, he's been poisoned,
all right.
345
00:16:19,500 --> 00:16:23,286
Clear!
346
00:16:23,330 --> 00:16:24,374
What did you do that
for?!
347
00:16:24,418 --> 00:16:26,420
I just said he was poisoned!
348
00:16:26,463 --> 00:16:28,030
I don't know! I panicked.
349
00:16:28,074 --> 00:16:31,686
Great, rookie. Now he's
poisoned, and unconscious.
350
00:16:31,729 --> 00:16:33,731
I said I was sorry.
351
00:16:33,775 --> 00:16:36,299
You know, I don't think
you did.
352
00:16:56,493 --> 00:16:58,234
Very sneaky.
353
00:17:39,493 --> 00:17:41,364
Whew! That was close.
354
00:17:44,628 --> 00:17:47,196
Wow! That was almost dangerous.
355
00:17:52,245 --> 00:17:54,943
Where could she have gone?
356
00:17:54,986 --> 00:17:56,553
So much walking...
357
00:18:19,185 --> 00:18:20,186
Hey!
358
00:18:27,193 --> 00:18:29,543
Hey! That was so not fair!
359
00:18:29,586 --> 00:18:30,631
Fair!?
360
00:18:30,674 --> 00:18:33,199
You're a ninja! Finish him.
361
00:18:33,242 --> 00:18:34,635
All right, hang on.
362
00:18:34,678 --> 00:18:35,984
You win.
363
00:18:36,027 --> 00:18:37,594
You surrender?
364
00:18:37,638 --> 00:18:38,987
Yeah. Totally.
365
00:18:39,030 --> 00:18:40,989
Aww! You said to the death.
366
00:18:41,032 --> 00:18:43,513
That's true. It's on
the scroll you sent.
367
00:18:43,557 --> 00:18:44,688
Dude. Seriously.
368
00:18:44,732 --> 00:18:45,689
Come on.
369
00:18:45,733 --> 00:18:47,691
You be quiet, cookie-thief!
370
00:18:47,735 --> 00:18:49,650
I'd like to spare your life...
371
00:18:49,693 --> 00:18:51,521
Awesome. You should.
372
00:18:51,565 --> 00:18:54,176
But how can I be sure your
clan will leave me alone?
373
00:18:54,220 --> 00:18:57,179
Because I'm the whole clan.
374
00:18:57,223 --> 00:18:58,441
How could that be?
375
00:18:58,485 --> 00:19:01,140
There were fifteen
of you or so.
376
00:19:01,183 --> 00:19:05,231
Yeah, that... Well It was the
annual Koshugi Clan barbecue
377
00:19:05,274 --> 00:19:07,146
and training retreat on Mt.
Fuji.
378
00:19:07,189 --> 00:19:09,191
I couldn't make it because
I had a wicked case of
379
00:19:09,235 --> 00:19:12,107
head lice and they didn't want
me giving it to everybody.
380
00:19:12,151 --> 00:19:15,545
Anyway... We are the ninjas/
Mighty mighty ninjas/
381
00:19:15,589 --> 00:19:17,156
Wherever we go-ho/
382
00:19:17,199 --> 00:19:18,592
People want to know-ho/
383
00:19:18,635 --> 00:19:22,596
Who we are, so we tell
them/ We are the ninjas...
384
00:19:22,639 --> 00:19:24,163
...mighty mighty ninjas/
385
00:19:24,206 --> 00:19:25,816
Wherever we go-ho...
...people want to
386
00:19:25,860 --> 00:19:30,081
know-ho... ...who, we
are, so we tell them...
387
00:19:38,438 --> 00:19:41,832
An entire clan of ninja wiped
out, just because they were
388
00:19:41,876 --> 00:19:44,835
too cheap to rent the bus
with anti-lock brakes.
389
00:19:44,879 --> 00:19:46,489
Ninjas.
390
00:19:46,533 --> 00:19:49,013
As assassins,
they're unparalleled.
391
00:19:49,057 --> 00:19:51,755
But they've always skimped
on rental transportation.
392
00:19:51,799 --> 00:19:53,496
So are we going to kill him or
what?
393
00:19:53,540 --> 00:19:54,802
What's with this guy?!
394
00:19:54,845 --> 00:19:56,978
He's still mad about his
cookies.
395
00:19:57,021 --> 00:20:00,111
Dude! There's gotta be
something we can work out.
396
00:20:00,155 --> 00:20:01,635
Maybe there is.
397
00:20:02,853 --> 00:20:05,639
Wow. I swore I'd never do this.
398
00:20:05,682 --> 00:20:07,771
Guess I'm not a ninja anymore.
399
00:20:07,815 --> 00:20:10,383
We've all had to give up
that dream at some point.
400
00:20:10,426 --> 00:20:11,688
What will you do now?
401
00:20:11,732 --> 00:20:14,300
Dunno. I've saved up
some of my ninja money,
402
00:20:14,343 --> 00:20:16,302
plus there was a pretty
big insurance settlement
403
00:20:16,345 --> 00:20:17,694
when my clan was wiped
out.
404
00:20:17,738 --> 00:20:19,218
I think I might
open a business.
405
00:20:19,261 --> 00:20:21,959
Cookies! Now!
406
00:20:22,003 --> 00:20:23,352
These are good.
407
00:20:29,228 --> 00:20:30,664
Where have you been?
408
00:20:30,707 --> 00:20:31,665
Hospital.
409
00:20:31,708 --> 00:20:33,144
Hey! Do I smell cookies?
410
00:20:33,188 --> 00:20:34,015
Mine!
411
00:20:34,058 --> 00:20:35,756
Dan, let him have a cookie.
412
00:20:35,799 --> 00:20:37,061
Fine.
413
00:20:37,105 --> 00:20:40,108
Bet you're not so tough
without that sword...
414
00:20:40,151 --> 00:20:41,805
Mmm!
415
00:20:41,849 --> 00:20:42,937
Who's this?
416
00:20:42,980 --> 00:20:43,938
He's the ninja.
417
00:20:43,981 --> 00:20:44,678
Ahhh!
418
00:20:44,721 --> 00:20:45,766
No more flying monkeys!
419
00:20:45,809 --> 00:20:47,507
Please!
420
00:20:47,550 --> 00:20:48,725
Former ninja.
421
00:20:48,769 --> 00:20:50,031
You can call me Dave.
422
00:20:50,074 --> 00:20:53,208
Oh. Hi Dave.
423
00:20:55,341 --> 00:20:57,647
I'm glad we didn't
kill Ninja Dave.
424
00:20:57,691 --> 00:21:00,128
Hey, me too. On the house.
425
00:21:00,171 --> 00:21:02,348
Cheers, guys.
426
00:21:02,391 --> 00:21:05,525
Ah, the sweet taste of revenge.
427
00:21:05,568 --> 00:21:11,313
And chocolate chips.
428
00:21:11,357 --> 00:21:12,575
Just kidding.
29399
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