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1
00:00:08,130 --> 00:00:09,730
They just walked out of there!
2
00:00:09,730 --> 00:00:11,770
Yeah, I know,
I was sort of sitting next to you.
3
00:00:11,770 --> 00:00:14,090
The whole Waters family.
They just walked right out of there!
4
00:00:14,090 --> 00:00:17,770
Again, I was in the room.
How do they always manage that?!
5
00:00:17,770 --> 00:00:19,210
They're good.
6
00:00:19,210 --> 00:00:21,010
They're greedy
and they'll do it again,
7
00:00:21,010 --> 00:00:23,290
and next time we're going to
catch them in the act.
8
00:00:23,290 --> 00:00:24,290
How?
9
00:00:33,890 --> 00:00:34,850
No good?
10
00:00:34,850 --> 00:00:37,930
They always know we're coming.
How do they always know?!
11
00:00:37,930 --> 00:00:40,250
They're good, they work at it.
12
00:00:40,250 --> 00:00:42,810
They're never going to stop.
Well, neither are we.
13
00:00:53,130 --> 00:00:54,250
Argh!
14
00:01:03,130 --> 00:01:04,970
Argh!
15
00:01:04,970 --> 00:01:07,850
Argh! AARGH!
16
00:01:09,090 --> 00:01:10,450
Oh! Greg...
17
00:01:10,450 --> 00:01:12,690
In the act!
18
00:01:12,690 --> 00:01:16,850
It's the only way we're going to
do this, in the act!
19
00:01:45,810 --> 00:01:47,690
They're still blocking it?
20
00:01:47,690 --> 00:01:49,970
Yeah. Very efficiently hacked.
21
00:01:49,970 --> 00:01:52,530
They must be bloody pleased
with themselves.
22
00:01:52,530 --> 00:01:54,730
They must be.
23
00:02:00,490 --> 00:02:01,930
Right then?
24
00:02:01,930 --> 00:02:05,410
Ah, no! No, you've got to make
the arrest. This one's yours, boss.
25
00:02:05,410 --> 00:02:07,570
You've never called me boss before.
26
00:02:07,570 --> 00:02:09,970
Oh, well, look what happens
when you're good.
27
00:02:09,970 --> 00:02:13,210
You know how most days
aren't good days?
28
00:02:13,210 --> 00:02:15,450
This is a good day. Not
for the Waters family.
29
00:02:16,450 --> 00:02:18,490
OK, ten men on the roof,
all exits covered.
30
00:02:18,490 --> 00:02:21,090
The bank's closed, so we've
no hostages to worry about.
31
00:02:21,850 --> 00:02:23,370
Sorry, no, go on. Go on.
32
00:02:23,370 --> 00:02:25,530
Um, we've got the tunnel
entrance covered...
33
00:02:25,610 --> 00:02:27,210
...and Davies, Willow and Christie
34
00:02:27,210 --> 00:02:29,490
are heading up armed
response on Mafeking Road.
35
00:02:29,890 --> 00:02:32,290
Sorry, I'd better get this.
It's him, isn't it?
36
00:02:39,490 --> 00:02:41,210
I, I, I have to go. What?!
37
00:02:41,210 --> 00:02:42,530
You make the arrest. No way!
38
00:02:42,530 --> 00:02:44,650
Sorry, you'll be fine.
I'm cool with this.
39
00:02:44,650 --> 00:02:47,930
Jones will get all the credit
if you leave now, you know he will.
40
00:02:48,970 --> 00:02:52,050
Yeah, well, yeah, it doesn't matter,
I have to go.
41
00:02:56,130 --> 00:02:58,050
Back up! I need maximum back up!
42
00:02:58,050 --> 00:03:00,010
Baker Street now!
43
00:03:12,530 --> 00:03:13,730
What's going on?!
44
00:03:13,730 --> 00:03:15,650
This is hard. What?
45
00:03:15,650 --> 00:03:18,010
Really hard.
Hardest thing I've ever had to do.
46
00:03:20,570 --> 00:03:23,490
Do you know any funny stories
about John?
47
00:03:25,090 --> 00:03:27,170
What?!
48
00:03:27,170 --> 00:03:30,210
I need anecdotes.
Didn't go to any trouble, did you?
49
00:04:57,890 --> 00:05:01,250
Shut up, Mrs Hudson.
I haven't said a word.
50
00:05:01,250 --> 00:05:03,290
You're formulating a question,
51
00:05:03,290 --> 00:05:05,770
it's physically painful
watching you think.
52
00:05:05,770 --> 00:05:07,690
I thought it was you playing.
53
00:05:07,690 --> 00:05:08,850
It was me playing.
54
00:05:09,850 --> 00:05:11,330
I am composing.
55
00:05:11,330 --> 00:05:13,730
You were dancing.
56
00:05:13,730 --> 00:05:15,210
I was road-testing.
57
00:05:15,210 --> 00:05:16,410
You what?
58
00:05:16,410 --> 00:05:18,250
Why are you here?
59
00:05:18,250 --> 00:05:22,090
I'm bringing you your morning tea.
You're not usually awake.
60
00:05:22,090 --> 00:05:23,530
You bring me tea in the morning?
61
00:05:23,530 --> 00:05:25,290
Well, where do you think
it came from?
62
00:05:25,290 --> 00:05:27,690
I don't know.
I just thought it sort of happened.
63
00:05:27,690 --> 00:05:29,330
Your mother has a lot to answer for.
64
00:05:29,330 --> 00:05:31,890
Hmm, I know. I have a list.
65
00:05:31,890 --> 00:05:34,090
Mycroft has a file.
66
00:05:34,090 --> 00:05:37,130
So, it's the big day then.
67
00:05:37,130 --> 00:05:39,290
What big day?
68
00:05:39,290 --> 00:05:42,850
The wedding! John and Mary
getting married.
69
00:05:42,850 --> 00:05:45,690
Two people who currently live
together are about to attend church,
70
00:05:45,690 --> 00:05:48,570
have a party, go on a short holiday,
then carry on living together.
71
00:05:48,570 --> 00:05:50,850
What's big about that?
It changes people, marriage.
72
00:05:50,850 --> 00:05:52,450
Hmm, no it doesn't.
73
00:05:52,450 --> 00:05:56,730
Well, you wouldn't understand,
cos you always live alone.
74
00:05:56,730 --> 00:05:58,970
Your husband was executed
for double murder.
75
00:05:58,970 --> 00:06:01,170
You're hardly an advert
for companionship.
76
00:06:01,170 --> 00:06:04,890
Marriage changes you as a person
in ways that you can't imagine.
77
00:06:04,890 --> 00:06:06,410
As does lethal injection.
78
00:06:06,410 --> 00:06:09,850
My best friend, Margaret,
she was my chief bridesmaid,
79
00:06:09,850 --> 00:06:13,210
we were going to be best friends
forever, we always said that,
80
00:06:13,210 --> 00:06:14,930
but I hardly saw her after that.
81
00:06:14,930 --> 00:06:17,650
Aren't there usually biscuits?
I've run out. Have the shops?
82
00:06:17,650 --> 00:06:21,250
She cried the whole day, saying,
"Ooh, it's the end of an era."
83
00:06:21,250 --> 00:06:23,010
I'm sure the shop
on the corner is open.
84
00:06:23,010 --> 00:06:26,730
She was probably right, really.
I remember she left early.
85
00:06:26,730 --> 00:06:30,930
I mean, who leaves a wedding early?
So sad.
86
00:06:30,930 --> 00:06:33,290
Hmm. Anyway, you've got
things to do.
87
00:06:33,290 --> 00:06:36,370
No, not really. I've got plenty of
time to get ready... Biscuits!
88
00:06:36,370 --> 00:06:39,370
Oh! I really am going to
have a word with your mother.
89
00:06:39,370 --> 00:06:42,050
You can if you like,
she understands very little.
90
00:06:57,930 --> 00:06:59,810
Right then.
91
00:07:05,410 --> 00:07:07,530
Into battle.
92
00:08:13,650 --> 00:08:15,370
Congratulations!
93
00:08:15,370 --> 00:08:19,250
OK, hold it there, I want to get
this shot of the newlyweds.
94
00:08:19,250 --> 00:08:21,690
Er, just the bride and groom,
please.
95
00:08:22,850 --> 00:08:25,530
Sherlock...
Oh, sorry.
96
00:08:25,530 --> 00:08:29,050
OK, three, two, one, cheese.
97
00:08:37,890 --> 00:08:42,170
The famous Mr Holmes.
I'm very pleased to meet you.
98
00:08:42,170 --> 00:08:44,490
But no sex, OK? Sorry?!
99
00:08:44,490 --> 00:08:47,770
You don't have to look so scared,
I'm only messing.
100
00:08:47,770 --> 00:08:51,410
Bridesmaid, best man,
it's a bit traditional.
101
00:08:51,410 --> 00:08:53,850
Is it? But not obligatory.
102
00:08:53,850 --> 00:08:57,570
If that's the sort of thing you're looking for,
the man over there in blue is your best bet.
103
00:08:57,570 --> 00:08:59,850
Recently divorced doctor
with a ginger cat...
104
00:08:59,850 --> 00:09:03,130
A barn conversion and a history
of erectile dysfunction.
105
00:09:03,130 --> 00:09:05,610
Reviewing that information,
possibly not your best bet.
106
00:09:05,610 --> 00:09:07,010
Yeah, maybe not.
107
00:09:07,010 --> 00:09:09,730
Sorry, there was one more deduction
there than I was expecting.
108
00:09:09,730 --> 00:09:13,170
Mr Holmes, you're going
to be incredibly useful.
109
00:09:21,170 --> 00:09:23,370
Hello. Lovely to meet you.
110
00:09:23,370 --> 00:09:25,170
How are you?
Beautiful, Mary.
111
00:09:25,170 --> 00:09:27,170
Thank you.
Congratulations.
112
00:09:27,170 --> 00:09:28,210
David!
113
00:09:28,210 --> 00:09:32,970
Ah, ah, Mary. Congratulations,
you look, um, very nice.
114
00:09:32,970 --> 00:09:36,250
Thanks. John, congratulations.
You're a lucky man. Thank you.
115
00:09:36,250 --> 00:09:39,850
Um, David, this is Sherlock. Hmm.
116
00:09:39,850 --> 00:09:42,810
Um, yeah, we've um... We've met.
117
00:09:46,370 --> 00:09:50,250
So, what exactly are my duties
as an usher?
118
00:09:51,610 --> 00:09:53,930
Let's talk about Mary first.
119
00:09:53,930 --> 00:09:55,370
Sorry, what?
120
00:09:55,370 --> 00:09:59,050
Well, I think you know what.
You went out with her for two years.
121
00:09:59,050 --> 00:10:01,410
Er, ages ago. We're...
We're just good friends now.
122
00:10:01,410 --> 00:10:02,650
Is that a fact?
123
00:10:02,650 --> 00:10:06,850
Whenever she tweets, you respond within five
minutes, regardless of time or current location,
124
00:10:06,850 --> 00:10:10,570
suggesting you have her on text alert. In your
Facebook photographs of the happy couple,
125
00:10:10,570 --> 00:10:14,010
Mary takes centre frame, whereas John
is always partly or entirely excluded.
126
00:10:14,010 --> 00:10:17,850
Well, you can't assume from that I've still
got some kind of interest in Mary...
127
00:10:17,850 --> 00:10:21,370
You volunteered to be a shoulder to cry on
on no less than three separate occasions.
128
00:10:21,370 --> 00:10:24,050
Do you have anything to say
in your defence?
129
00:10:24,050 --> 00:10:27,010
I think from now on, we'll downgrade
you to casual acquaintance.
130
00:10:27,010 --> 00:10:29,450
No more than three planned
social encounters a year
131
00:10:29,450 --> 00:10:31,290
and always in John's presence.
132
00:10:31,290 --> 00:10:33,850
I have your contact details.
I will be monitoring.
133
00:10:35,450 --> 00:10:39,530
They're right about you.
You're a bloody psychopath.
134
00:10:39,530 --> 00:10:42,730
High functioning sociopath,
with your number.
135
00:10:53,210 --> 00:10:54,410
Um...
136
00:10:57,090 --> 00:10:59,290
Hello. Darling. Thank you.
137
00:10:59,290 --> 00:11:01,490
You look fabulous. Thank you.
138
00:11:01,490 --> 00:11:03,410
Thanks for coming, thank you.
139
00:11:05,410 --> 00:11:07,850
Er, yes, well done in the service,
Archie.
140
00:11:07,850 --> 00:11:11,810
He's really come out of his shell.
I don't know how you did it. Um...
141
00:11:16,570 --> 00:11:18,810
Basically it's a cute smile
to the bride's side,
142
00:11:18,810 --> 00:11:21,170
cute smile to the groom's side
and then the rings. No.
143
00:11:21,170 --> 00:11:22,810
And you have to wear the outfit. No.
144
00:11:22,810 --> 00:11:24,810
You really do have to wear
the outfit. What for?
145
00:11:24,810 --> 00:11:27,730
Grown-ups like that sort of thing.
Why?
146
00:11:27,730 --> 00:11:29,850
I don't know, I'll ask one.
147
00:11:29,850 --> 00:11:32,250
You're a detective.
148
00:11:32,250 --> 00:11:34,850
Yep. Have you solved any murders?
149
00:11:34,850 --> 00:11:37,090
Sure, loads. Can I see?
150
00:11:38,570 --> 00:11:39,770
Yeah, all right.
151
00:11:47,010 --> 00:11:48,810
What's all the stuff in his eye?
152
00:11:48,810 --> 00:11:51,530
Maggots. Cool!
153
00:11:51,530 --> 00:11:52,810
Hmm.
154
00:11:52,810 --> 00:11:55,570
He said you had some
pictures for him, as a treat?
155
00:11:55,570 --> 00:11:57,770
Er, yes, if he's good.
156
00:11:57,770 --> 00:12:00,330
Beheadings. Lovely little village.
157
00:12:00,330 --> 00:12:02,690
Hmm? What did you say?
158
00:12:07,450 --> 00:12:08,930
Hold it.
159
00:12:10,810 --> 00:12:11,970
Nice.
160
00:12:16,450 --> 00:12:18,570
I'm starving. Thanks.
161
00:12:18,570 --> 00:12:20,770
I had to lose so much weight to
get into this dress.
162
00:12:22,610 --> 00:12:24,730
Hmm, he's nice.
163
00:12:24,730 --> 00:12:28,290
Traces of two leading brands of deodorant,
both advertised for their strength,
164
00:12:28,290 --> 00:12:31,490
suggestive of a chronic body odour
problem, manifesting under stress.
165
00:12:31,490 --> 00:12:34,210
OK, done there.
What about his friend?
166
00:12:36,890 --> 00:12:40,450
Long-term relationship,
compulsive cheat. Seriously?
167
00:12:40,450 --> 00:12:42,690
Waterproof cover on his smart-phone.
168
00:12:42,690 --> 00:12:45,730
Yet his complexion
doesn't indicate outdoor work.
169
00:12:45,730 --> 00:12:48,890
It suggests he's in the habit of taking
his phone into the shower with him,
170
00:12:48,890 --> 00:12:52,650
which means he often receives texts and emails
he'd rather went unseen. Can I keep you?
171
00:12:52,650 --> 00:12:55,450
Do you like solving crimes?
Do you have a vacancy?
172
00:12:56,890 --> 00:12:58,770
So, Harry? Er, no. No show.
173
00:12:58,770 --> 00:13:00,250
Darling, I'm so sorry.
174
00:13:00,250 --> 00:13:03,210
Yeah, it was a bit of a punt
asking her, I suppose.
175
00:13:03,210 --> 00:13:05,850
Still, free bar,
wouldn't have been a good mix.
176
00:13:07,810 --> 00:13:09,850
Oh. God, wow!
177
00:13:09,850 --> 00:13:12,930
Is that...? He came.
178
00:13:16,850 --> 00:13:20,530
So that's him, Major Sholto.
Uh-huh.
179
00:13:23,050 --> 00:13:26,930
If they're such good friends,
why does he barely even mention him?
180
00:13:26,930 --> 00:13:30,370
He mentions him all the time to me,
never shuts up about him.
181
00:13:30,370 --> 00:13:32,490
About HIM? Mm-hmm.
182
00:13:32,490 --> 00:13:34,930
Urgh! I chose this wine,
it's bloody awful!
183
00:13:34,930 --> 00:13:37,810
Yes, but it's definitely him
that he talks about? Mm-hmm.
184
00:13:37,810 --> 00:13:40,930
I'm very, very, glad to see you, sir.
185
00:13:42,130 --> 00:13:45,210
I know you don't really
do this sort of thing.
186
00:13:45,210 --> 00:13:47,530
Well, I do for old friends,
Watson.
187
00:13:47,530 --> 00:13:49,290
John.
188
00:13:49,290 --> 00:13:51,370
It's good to see you. You too.
189
00:13:54,170 --> 00:13:56,090
Civilian life suiting you, then?
190
00:13:56,090 --> 00:13:59,930
Er, er, yes. Well, I think so, sir.
No more need for the trick cyclist?
191
00:13:59,930 --> 00:14:02,610
No, I go now and then.
Sort of a top-up.
192
00:14:04,050 --> 00:14:06,370
Therapy can be very helpful.
193
00:14:09,130 --> 00:14:11,970
Where are you living these days?
194
00:14:11,970 --> 00:14:15,170
Oh, way out in the middle of
nowhere. You wouldn't know it.
195
00:14:15,170 --> 00:14:17,610
You look well... I've never even
heard him say his name.
196
00:14:17,610 --> 00:14:21,010
Well, he's almost a recluse,
you know, since... Yes.
197
00:14:21,010 --> 00:14:22,850
I didn't think he'd show up at all.
198
00:14:22,850 --> 00:14:25,090
John says he's the most unsociable
man he's ever met.
199
00:14:25,090 --> 00:14:27,130
He is? He's the most unsociable?
Hmm.
200
00:14:27,130 --> 00:14:30,650
Ah, that's why he's bouncing around
him like a puppy.
201
00:14:30,650 --> 00:14:32,770
Oh, Sherlock!
202
00:14:32,770 --> 00:14:36,170
Neither of us were the first,
you know. Stop smiling.
203
00:14:36,170 --> 00:14:38,170
It's my wedding day!
204
00:14:41,050 --> 00:14:43,170
Urgh!
205
00:15:11,530 --> 00:15:14,210
Yes? What, Sherlock?
206
00:15:14,210 --> 00:15:16,330
Why are you out of breath? Filing.
207
00:15:16,330 --> 00:15:20,170
Either I've caught you in a compromising
position or you've been working out again.
208
00:15:20,170 --> 00:15:22,170
I favour the latter.
What do you want?
209
00:15:22,170 --> 00:15:24,770
I need your answer, Mycroft,
as a matter of urgency.
210
00:15:24,770 --> 00:15:28,730
Answer? Even at the eleventh hour,
it's not too late, you know.
211
00:15:28,730 --> 00:15:29,890
Oh, Lord!
212
00:15:29,890 --> 00:15:33,090
Cars can be ordered,
private jets commandeered.
213
00:15:33,090 --> 00:15:36,050
Today. It's today, isn't it?
214
00:15:36,050 --> 00:15:39,290
No, Sherlock, I will not be
coming to the night-do,
215
00:15:39,290 --> 00:15:40,970
as you so poetically put it.
216
00:15:40,970 --> 00:15:44,890
What a shame.
Mary and John will be extremely d...
217
00:15:44,890 --> 00:15:47,850
Delighted not to have me
hanging around.
218
00:15:47,850 --> 00:15:49,290
Oh, I don't know.
219
00:15:49,290 --> 00:15:52,410
There should always be
a spectre at the feast.
220
00:15:52,410 --> 00:15:55,810
So, this is it, then? The big day.
221
00:15:55,810 --> 00:15:58,810
I suppose I'll be seeing
a lot more of you from now on.
222
00:15:58,810 --> 00:16:01,370
What do you mean?
Just like old times.
223
00:16:01,370 --> 00:16:04,890
No, I don't understand. 'Well,
it's the end of an era, isn't it?'
224
00:16:04,890 --> 00:16:07,930
John and Mary, domestic bliss.
225
00:16:07,930 --> 00:16:11,130
No, no, no. I prefer to think of it
as the beginning of a new chapter.
226
00:16:13,130 --> 00:16:16,650
What? Nothing.
I know that silence. What?
227
00:16:16,650 --> 00:16:18,370
Well, I'd better let you
get back to it.
228
00:16:18,370 --> 00:16:20,970
You have a big speech or something,
don't you?
229
00:16:20,970 --> 00:16:24,490
What? Cakes, karaoke, mingling.
230
00:16:24,490 --> 00:16:27,850
Mycroft! This is what people do,
Sherlock. They get married.
231
00:16:27,850 --> 00:16:30,570
I warned you, don't get involved.
232
00:16:30,570 --> 00:16:32,530
Involved? I'm not involved. No...
233
00:16:32,530 --> 00:16:35,970
John asked me to be his best man, how could I say no?
Absolutely. I'm not involved.
234
00:16:35,970 --> 00:16:38,130
I believe you. Really, I do.
235
00:16:38,130 --> 00:16:41,970
Have a lovely day and do give
the happy couple my best.
236
00:16:43,210 --> 00:16:44,450
I will.
237
00:16:44,450 --> 00:16:48,610
Oh, by the way, Sherlock,
do you remember Redbeard?
238
00:16:50,930 --> 00:16:53,130
I'm not a child anymore, Mycroft.
239
00:16:53,130 --> 00:16:55,170
No, of course you're not.
240
00:16:55,170 --> 00:16:57,650
Enjoy not getting involved, Sherlock.
241
00:17:19,770 --> 00:17:21,610
Pray silence for the best man.
242
00:17:29,370 --> 00:17:31,570
Ladies and gentlemen,
243
00:17:31,570 --> 00:17:34,130
family and friends,
244
00:17:34,130 --> 00:17:36,610
and...
245
00:17:36,610 --> 00:17:39,410
um, others.
246
00:17:43,410 --> 00:17:45,690
Er...
247
00:17:50,690 --> 00:17:52,450
A-also...
248
00:17:56,970 --> 00:17:59,530
Greg... Molly.
I've just had a thought.
249
00:17:59,530 --> 00:18:00,610
Is that a brain?
250
00:18:00,610 --> 00:18:02,730
What if John asks Sherlock
to be his best man?
251
00:18:02,730 --> 00:18:05,090
Well, he will, won't he?
He's bound to. Exactly.
252
00:18:05,090 --> 00:18:09,370
So? So, he'll have to make a speech,
in front of people.
253
00:18:09,370 --> 00:18:13,010
There'll be actual people there,
actually listening.
254
00:18:14,130 --> 00:18:16,330
Well, what's the worst
that could happen?
255
00:18:16,330 --> 00:18:18,570
Helen-Louise probably
wondered the same.
256
00:18:18,570 --> 00:18:20,130
Helen-Louise?
257
00:18:26,210 --> 00:18:27,570
Oh, hello dear.
258
00:18:27,570 --> 00:18:30,010
I was just thinking,
if John does ask Sherlock...
259
00:18:30,010 --> 00:18:33,090
What, the speech, dear?
No, it'll be fine.
260
00:18:33,090 --> 00:18:36,050
It's not just the speech,
though, is it?
261
00:18:44,330 --> 00:18:45,770
Oh, brilliant!
262
00:18:45,770 --> 00:18:48,930
Mrs Hudson? Hello, darling.
Are you all right?
263
00:18:48,930 --> 00:18:51,490
I was coming to see Sherlock
and I thought you were...
264
00:18:51,490 --> 00:18:53,970
No... Possibly dying.
265
00:18:53,970 --> 00:18:56,010
Oh, sorry.
266
00:18:56,010 --> 00:18:58,450
What's wrong?
267
00:18:58,450 --> 00:19:01,050
The telegrams!
268
00:19:01,050 --> 00:19:02,570
Sorry, what?
269
00:19:02,570 --> 00:19:05,290
Oh, sorry.
270
00:19:08,050 --> 00:19:10,290
Telegrams!
271
00:19:10,290 --> 00:19:13,410
Right, um...
272
00:19:13,410 --> 00:19:17,370
First things first, telegrams.
273
00:19:17,370 --> 00:19:20,850
Well, they're not actually telegrams, we
just call them telegrams. I don't know why.
274
00:19:20,850 --> 00:19:22,570
Wedding tradition.
275
00:19:22,570 --> 00:19:25,970
Because we don't have enough of that
already, apparently.
276
00:19:25,970 --> 00:19:27,050
"To Mr and Mrs Watson,
277
00:19:27,050 --> 00:19:29,770
"so sorry I am unable to be with
you on your special day.
278
00:19:29,770 --> 00:19:32,970
"Good luck and best wishes,
Mike Stanford." Aah. Aw.
279
00:19:32,970 --> 00:19:35,690
"To John and Mary, all good
wishes for your special day,"
280
00:19:35,690 --> 00:19:37,890
"with love and many big..."
281
00:19:37,890 --> 00:19:41,050
"Big squishy cuddles
from Stella and Ted."
282
00:19:43,170 --> 00:19:46,250
"Mary, lots of love..."
283
00:19:46,250 --> 00:19:48,090
Yeah?
284
00:19:48,090 --> 00:19:53,050
"Poppet. Oodles of love
and heaps of good wishes from Cam."
285
00:19:53,050 --> 00:19:56,370
"Wish your family
could have seen this."
286
00:19:56,370 --> 00:20:01,050
"Special day..."
"Very special day..."
287
00:20:01,050 --> 00:20:03,570
"Love..." "Love..." "Love..."
"Love..." "Love..."
288
00:20:03,570 --> 00:20:06,690
Bit of a theme, you get the general
gist. People are basically fond.
289
00:20:09,050 --> 00:20:11,170
John Watson.
290
00:20:13,810 --> 00:20:15,850
My friend, John Watson.
291
00:20:17,330 --> 00:20:19,370
John...
292
00:20:19,370 --> 00:20:22,890
When John first broached the subject
of being best man, I was confused.
293
00:20:22,890 --> 00:20:25,490
Sherlock? What was that
noise downstairs?
294
00:20:25,490 --> 00:20:26,890
Oh, it was Mrs Hudson laughing.
295
00:20:26,890 --> 00:20:29,130
Hmm, it sounded like
she was torturing an owl.
296
00:20:29,130 --> 00:20:31,290
Yeah, well, it was laughter.
297
00:20:31,290 --> 00:20:32,490
Could have been both.
298
00:20:33,490 --> 00:20:34,850
Busy?
299
00:20:34,850 --> 00:20:38,970
Oh, just occupying myself.
Sometimes it's so hard not smoking.
300
00:20:38,970 --> 00:20:41,210
Mind if I interrupt?
301
00:20:41,210 --> 00:20:42,330
Be my guest.
302
00:20:44,410 --> 00:20:47,490
Tea? Er...
303
00:20:47,490 --> 00:20:50,450
So, er, the big question.
304
00:20:50,450 --> 00:20:51,730
Mm-hmm?
305
00:20:53,250 --> 00:20:55,210
The best man.
306
00:20:55,210 --> 00:20:56,570
The best man?
307
00:20:56,570 --> 00:20:58,850
What do you think?
Billy Kincaid.
308
00:20:58,850 --> 00:21:01,930
Sorry, what? Billy Kincaid, the Camden
Garrotter, best man I ever knew.
309
00:21:01,930 --> 00:21:04,090
Vast contributions to charity,
never disclosed.
310
00:21:04,090 --> 00:21:06,930
Personally managed to save
three hospitals from closure
311
00:21:06,930 --> 00:21:10,050
and ran the best and safest
children's homes in north England.
312
00:21:10,050 --> 00:21:14,610
Yes, every now and again there'd be some garrotings, but
stacking up the lives saved against the garrotings,
313
00:21:14,610 --> 00:21:16,850
on balance I'd say he...
For my wedding.
314
00:21:16,850 --> 00:21:18,450
For me, I need a best man.
315
00:21:18,450 --> 00:21:20,810
Oh, right. Maybe not a garrotter.
316
00:21:20,810 --> 00:21:23,330
Gavin? Who?
317
00:21:23,330 --> 00:21:26,370
Gavin Lestrade?
He's a man and good at it.
318
00:21:26,370 --> 00:21:29,370
It's Greg.
And he's not my best friend.
319
00:21:29,370 --> 00:21:31,090
Oh, Mike Stanford, I see.
320
00:21:31,090 --> 00:21:34,290
Well, he's nice. Um, though I'm not
sure how well he'd cope with all...
321
00:21:34,290 --> 00:21:37,090
No, Mike's great,
but HE'S not my best friend.
322
00:21:39,170 --> 00:21:42,890
Look, Sherlock, this is the biggest
and most important day of my life...
323
00:21:42,890 --> 00:21:45,410
Well... No, it is. It is.
324
00:21:45,410 --> 00:21:47,730
And I want to be up there
with the two people
325
00:21:47,730 --> 00:21:51,930
that I love and care about
most in the world. Yes.
326
00:21:54,810 --> 00:21:57,050
So Mary Morstan... Yes.
327
00:21:59,570 --> 00:22:00,770
And...
328
00:22:04,730 --> 00:22:06,010
...you.
329
00:22:08,570 --> 00:22:11,130
I confess at first I didn't realise
he was asking me.
330
00:22:11,130 --> 00:22:15,130
When finally I understood, I expressed to him
that I was both flattered and surprised.
331
00:22:19,970 --> 00:22:24,010
I explained to him that I'd never expected this
request and I was a little daunted in the face of it.
332
00:22:24,010 --> 00:22:25,290
Sherlock...
333
00:22:29,130 --> 00:22:32,770
I nonetheless promised I would do my very
best to accomplish a task which was, for me,
334
00:22:32,770 --> 00:22:35,210
as demanding and difficult
as any I had ever contemplated.
335
00:22:35,210 --> 00:22:39,050
Additionally, I thanked him for the trust
he placed in me and indicated that I was,
336
00:22:39,050 --> 00:22:42,730
in some ways, very close to
being moved by it.
337
00:22:47,450 --> 00:22:49,410
No, it's getting a bit scary now.
338
00:22:49,410 --> 00:22:51,850
It later transpired that I'd said
none of this out loud.
339
00:22:58,850 --> 00:23:00,010
So, in fact...
340
00:23:03,250 --> 00:23:05,450
You, you mean... Yes.
341
00:23:06,770 --> 00:23:09,210
I'm your...
342
00:23:09,210 --> 00:23:12,170
best... Man.
..friend?
343
00:23:13,810 --> 00:23:15,490
Yeah, of course you are.
344
00:23:16,850 --> 00:23:20,250
Of course... You're my best friend.
345
00:23:28,930 --> 00:23:31,890
How was that?
346
00:23:31,890 --> 00:23:33,610
Surprisingly OK.
347
00:23:35,730 --> 00:23:38,370
So you'll have to make a speech,
of course.
348
00:23:46,530 --> 00:23:48,690
Done that. Done that.
349
00:23:48,690 --> 00:23:50,530
Done that bit, done that bit.
350
00:23:50,530 --> 00:23:53,210
Done that bit. Hmm.
351
00:23:55,210 --> 00:23:57,690
I'm afraid, John,
I can't congratulate you.
352
00:23:57,690 --> 00:23:59,930
All emotions,
and in particular love,
353
00:23:59,930 --> 00:24:03,290
stand opposed to the pure, cold
reason I hold above all things.
354
00:24:03,290 --> 00:24:05,650
A wedding is,
in my considered opinion,
355
00:24:05,650 --> 00:24:10,290
nothing short of a celebration of all
that is false and specious and irrational
356
00:24:10,290 --> 00:24:13,330
and sentimental in this ailing
and morally compromised world.
357
00:24:13,330 --> 00:24:16,650
Today we honour the deathwatch beetle
that is the doom of our society,
358
00:24:16,650 --> 00:24:19,530
and in time, one feels certain,
our entire species.
359
00:24:26,850 --> 00:24:30,570
But anyway, let's talk about John.
Please.
360
00:24:30,570 --> 00:24:33,490
If I burden myself with a little
helpmate during my adventures,
361
00:24:33,490 --> 00:24:37,410
this is not out of sentiment or caprice, it
is that he has many fine qualities of his own
362
00:24:37,410 --> 00:24:40,130
that he has overlooked
in his obsession with me.
363
00:24:40,130 --> 00:24:43,650
Indeed, any reputation I have for mental
acuity and sharpness comes, in truth,
364
00:24:43,650 --> 00:24:46,850
from the extraordinary contrast
John so selflessly provides.
365
00:24:46,850 --> 00:24:51,130
It is a fact, I believe, that brides tend to favour
exceptionally plain bridesmaids for their big day.
366
00:24:51,130 --> 00:24:54,610
There is a certain analogy there,
I feel. And contrast is, after all,
367
00:24:54,610 --> 00:24:57,370
God's own plan to enhance
the beauty of his creation.
368
00:24:57,370 --> 00:24:59,810
Or it would be if God were not
a ludicrous fantasy
369
00:24:59,810 --> 00:25:02,810
designed to provide a career
opportunity for the family idiot.
370
00:25:06,130 --> 00:25:08,890
The point I'm trying to make
is that I am
371
00:25:08,890 --> 00:25:12,850
the most unpleasant, rude,
372
00:25:12,850 --> 00:25:15,690
ignorant and all-round
obnoxious arsehole
373
00:25:15,690 --> 00:25:19,050
that anyone could possibly have
the misfortune to meet.
374
00:25:19,050 --> 00:25:21,530
I am dismissive of the virtuous,
375
00:25:21,530 --> 00:25:23,610
unaware of the beautiful
376
00:25:23,610 --> 00:25:26,250
and uncomprehending
in the face of the happy.
377
00:25:27,370 --> 00:25:29,930
So if I didn't understand
I was being asked to be best man,
378
00:25:29,930 --> 00:25:33,170
it is because I never expected
to be anybody's best friend.
379
00:25:34,610 --> 00:25:36,850
And certainly not the best friend
380
00:25:36,850 --> 00:25:40,170
of the bravest and kindest
and wisest human being
381
00:25:40,170 --> 00:25:43,010
I have ever had the good fortune
of knowing.
382
00:25:44,530 --> 00:25:46,410
John, I am a ridiculous man.
383
00:25:47,450 --> 00:25:50,770
Redeemed only by the warmth
and constancy of your friendship.
384
00:25:50,770 --> 00:25:52,850
But, as I am apparently
your best friend,
385
00:25:52,850 --> 00:25:55,930
I cannot congratulate you
on your choice of companion.
386
00:25:58,490 --> 00:26:00,010
Actually, now I can.
387
00:26:01,770 --> 00:26:05,290
Mary, when I say
you deserve this man,
388
00:26:05,290 --> 00:26:08,930
it is the highest compliment
of which I am capable.
389
00:26:08,930 --> 00:26:15,610
John, you have endured war
and injury and tragic loss -
390
00:26:15,610 --> 00:26:20,490
so sorry again about that last one -
so know this, today you sit between
391
00:26:20,490 --> 00:26:24,730
the woman you have made your wife
and the man you have saved.
392
00:26:24,730 --> 00:26:28,850
In short, the two people who love
you most in all this world.
393
00:26:28,850 --> 00:26:31,290
And I know I speak for Mary as well
when I say,
394
00:26:31,290 --> 00:26:35,050
we will never let you down and we
have a lifetime ahead to prove that.
395
00:26:39,210 --> 00:26:41,810
(If I try and hug him, stop me.)
Certainly not.
396
00:26:43,250 --> 00:26:47,050
Ah, yes. Now onto
some funny stories about John.
397
00:26:49,570 --> 00:26:52,810
What's wrong? What happened?
Why are you all doing that? John?
398
00:26:52,810 --> 00:26:54,610
Oh, Sherlock!
399
00:26:54,610 --> 00:26:58,010
Did I do it wrong?
No, you didn't. Come here.
400
00:26:59,690 --> 00:27:02,210
I haven't finished yet.
Yeah, I know, I know.
401
00:27:02,210 --> 00:27:05,610
So onto some funny stories now...
Can you wait till I sit down?
402
00:27:14,250 --> 00:27:18,010
So, onto some funny stories
about John.
403
00:27:18,010 --> 00:27:22,210
If you could all just cheer up
a bit, that would be better.
404
00:27:22,210 --> 00:27:23,370
On we go.
405
00:27:23,370 --> 00:27:28,970
So for funny stories, one has to
look no further than John's blog.
406
00:27:28,970 --> 00:27:30,850
The record of our time together.
407
00:27:30,850 --> 00:27:33,210
Of course, he does
tend to romanticise things a bit,
408
00:27:33,210 --> 00:27:35,370
but then, you know, he's a romantic.
409
00:27:35,370 --> 00:27:38,690
We've tackled some strange cases.
410
00:27:38,690 --> 00:27:40,770
The Hollow Client...
411
00:27:46,930 --> 00:27:48,610
The Poison Giant...
412
00:27:52,810 --> 00:27:54,330
Get down, John!
413
00:28:00,050 --> 00:28:02,130
We've had some frustrating cases...
414
00:28:07,450 --> 00:28:09,650
What is that?
415
00:28:09,650 --> 00:28:12,210
A French decathlete found
completely out of his mind,
416
00:28:12,210 --> 00:28:15,250
surrounded by 1,812 matchboxes,
417
00:28:15,250 --> 00:28:16,770
all empty except this one.
418
00:28:16,770 --> 00:28:18,490
And what's in that one?
419
00:28:20,530 --> 00:28:22,610
Inexplicable.
420
00:28:25,690 --> 00:28:27,610
Touching cases...
421
00:28:29,010 --> 00:28:30,890
She's going to ring the doorbell.
422
00:28:32,650 --> 00:28:35,370
Oh, no. She's changed her mind.
423
00:28:35,370 --> 00:28:39,210
Oh, she's going to do it.
No, she's leaving.
424
00:28:39,210 --> 00:28:41,330
She's leaving.
Oh, she's coming back.
425
00:28:41,330 --> 00:28:45,570
She's a client, she's boring. I've
seen those symptoms before. Hmm?
426
00:28:45,570 --> 00:28:49,170
Oscillation on the pavement
always means there's a love affair.
427
00:28:49,170 --> 00:28:52,370
And of course I have to mention
the elephant in the room...
428
00:28:56,290 --> 00:28:58,570
But we want something
429
00:28:58,570 --> 00:29:01,410
very particular for this
special day, don't we?
430
00:29:03,570 --> 00:29:05,090
The Bloody Guardsman...
431
00:29:08,210 --> 00:29:11,770
Need to work on your half of the
church, Mary, looking a bit thin.
432
00:29:11,770 --> 00:29:15,290
Oh, orphan's lot. Friends,
that's all I have, lots of friends.
433
00:29:15,290 --> 00:29:17,970
Schedule the organ music to
begin at precisely 11:48...
434
00:29:17,970 --> 00:29:20,450
But the rehearsal's not for
another two weeks, just calm down.
435
00:29:20,450 --> 00:29:22,290
Calm? I am calm. I'm extremely calm.
436
00:29:22,290 --> 00:29:24,570
Let's get back to the reception,
come on.
437
00:29:24,570 --> 00:29:26,370
John's cousin, top table?
438
00:29:26,370 --> 00:29:29,090
Hmm, hates you.
Can't even bear to think about you.
439
00:29:29,090 --> 00:29:32,090
Seriously? Second class post,
cheap card.
440
00:29:32,090 --> 00:29:35,250
Bought at a petrol station. Look at
the stamp, three attempts at licking,
441
00:29:35,250 --> 00:29:37,490
she's obviously unconsciously
retaining saliva.
442
00:29:37,490 --> 00:29:40,890
Ah, let's stick her by the bogs.
Oh, yes.
443
00:29:41,770 --> 00:29:43,490
Who else hates me?
444
00:29:46,130 --> 00:29:47,690
Oh, great, thanks.
445
00:29:47,690 --> 00:29:50,770
"Priceless painting nicked."
Looks interesting.
446
00:29:50,770 --> 00:29:52,130
Table four... Done.
447
00:29:52,130 --> 00:29:53,650
"My husband is three people."
448
00:29:53,650 --> 00:29:56,250
Table five...
Major James Sholto - who he?
449
00:29:56,250 --> 00:29:59,650
John's old commanding officer. I don't
think he's coming. He'll be there.
450
00:29:59,650 --> 00:30:01,930
Well, he needs to RSVP, then.
He'll be there. Oh.
451
00:30:01,930 --> 00:30:05,330
"My husband is three people."
It's interesting.
452
00:30:05,330 --> 00:30:08,410
It says he has three distinct
patterns of moles on his skin.
453
00:30:08,410 --> 00:30:12,050
Identical triplets, one in half a million births.
Solved it without leaving the flat.
454
00:30:12,050 --> 00:30:14,570
Now, serviettes...
Swan or Sydney Opera House?
455
00:30:14,570 --> 00:30:17,210
Where did you learn that? Many
skills are required in the field
456
00:30:17,210 --> 00:30:21,010
of criminal investigation... Fibbing, Sherlock.
I once broke an alibi by demonstrating
457
00:30:21,010 --> 00:30:25,090
the exact severity of a fold... I'm not John, I can
tell when you're fibbing. OK, I learnt it on YouTube.
458
00:30:25,090 --> 00:30:27,690
Opera House, please.
Oh, hang on, I'm buzzing.
459
00:30:27,690 --> 00:30:29,330
Hello?
460
00:30:30,330 --> 00:30:33,810
Oh, hi, Beth.
461
00:30:33,810 --> 00:30:35,810
Yeah, yeah, I don't see why not.
462
00:30:35,810 --> 00:30:39,490
Actually, if that's Beth,
it's probably for me too, hang on.
463
00:30:43,810 --> 00:30:47,610
He knows we don't have a friend called Beth,
he's going to figure out that it's code.
464
00:30:47,610 --> 00:30:51,050
He's YouTubing serviettes. He's thorough.
He's terrified. Of course he's not.
465
00:30:51,050 --> 00:30:54,690
When you're scared of something you start
wishing it sooner, just to get it all going.
466
00:30:54,690 --> 00:30:57,170
But why would he be scared
that we're getting married?
467
00:30:57,170 --> 00:30:59,770
It's not going to change anything,
we'll still do stuff.
468
00:30:59,770 --> 00:31:02,090
You need to prove it to him.
I told you to find him a new case.
469
00:31:02,090 --> 00:31:06,090
I'm trying. But you need to run him, OK?
Show him it's still the good old days.
470
00:31:15,370 --> 00:31:17,970
That just sort of happened.
471
00:31:20,250 --> 00:31:23,850
Sherlock, um, mate...
472
00:31:25,530 --> 00:31:27,610
I have...
473
00:31:27,610 --> 00:31:31,090
I've smelled 18 different perfumes,
474
00:31:31,090 --> 00:31:36,970
I've sampled nine different slices
of cake, which all tasted identical.
475
00:31:36,970 --> 00:31:40,970
I like the bridesmaids in purple...
Lilac. Lilac.
476
00:31:40,970 --> 00:31:43,250
Um, there are no more decisions
left to make.
477
00:31:43,250 --> 00:31:46,370
I don't even understand the decisions
that we have made.
478
00:31:46,370 --> 00:31:48,450
I'm faking opinions,
and it's exhausting.
479
00:31:48,450 --> 00:31:54,170
So, please, before she comes back...
pick something.
480
00:31:55,450 --> 00:31:58,890
Anything. Pick one. Pick what?
481
00:31:58,890 --> 00:32:01,530
A case. Your inbox is bursting.
482
00:32:01,530 --> 00:32:04,250
Just... get me out of here.
483
00:32:04,250 --> 00:32:06,450
You want to go out on a case? Now?
484
00:32:06,450 --> 00:32:09,370
Please. Sherlock, for me.
485
00:32:11,450 --> 00:32:14,890
Don't you worry about a thing,
I'll get you out of this.
486
00:32:14,890 --> 00:32:16,770
Oh.
487
00:32:16,770 --> 00:32:19,610
"Dear Mr Holmes,
my name is Bainbridge."
488
00:32:19,610 --> 00:32:22,250
"I'm a Private in Her Majesty's
Household Guard."
489
00:32:22,250 --> 00:32:24,610
"I'm writing to you
about a personal matter..."
490
00:32:24,610 --> 00:32:26,970
"One I don't care to
bring before my superiors,"
491
00:32:26,970 --> 00:32:28,330
"it would sound so trivial."
492
00:32:29,450 --> 00:32:31,290
"But I think someone's stalking me."
493
00:32:31,290 --> 00:32:33,970
"I'm used to tourists, it's part
of the job,"
494
00:32:33,970 --> 00:32:35,850
"but this is different."
495
00:32:35,850 --> 00:32:37,250
"Someone's watching me."
496
00:32:40,370 --> 00:32:42,410
"He's taking pictures of me
every day."
497
00:32:43,770 --> 00:32:47,170
"I don't want to mention it to the Major,
but it's really preying on my mind."
498
00:32:51,490 --> 00:32:54,450
Uniform fetishist?
All the nice girls like a soldier.
499
00:32:54,450 --> 00:32:58,450
It's "sailor". And Bainbridge
thinks his stalker is a bloke.
500
00:32:58,450 --> 00:33:00,890
Let's go and investigate. Please.
501
00:33:00,890 --> 00:33:03,090
Elite guard. 40 enlisted
men and officers.
502
00:33:03,090 --> 00:33:05,370
Why this particular Grenadier?
Curious.
503
00:33:05,370 --> 00:33:09,090
Now you're talking. OK.
Bye!
504
00:33:09,090 --> 00:33:12,330
Er, we're just going to...
I need, um, Sherlock to help me
505
00:33:12,330 --> 00:33:14,850
choose some er... Ties.
Socks.
506
00:33:14,850 --> 00:33:16,250
Why don't we go with socks? Yeah.
507
00:33:16,250 --> 00:33:18,130
I mean, you've got to get
the right ones.
508
00:33:18,130 --> 00:33:21,570
Exactly, to go with my...
Tie. Outfit.
509
00:33:21,570 --> 00:33:24,610
That'll take a while, right?
Is my coat in there? Yes.
510
00:33:26,810 --> 00:33:29,370
I'm just going to take him
out for a bit. Run him.
511
00:33:29,370 --> 00:33:31,730
I know. You said
you'd find him a case. Hmm.
512
00:33:31,730 --> 00:33:33,530
Coming, Sherlock? Coming!
513
00:33:41,610 --> 00:33:43,650
Taxi!
514
00:33:57,730 --> 00:34:00,050
Company halt!
515
00:34:04,650 --> 00:34:06,250
Right turn!
516
00:34:07,650 --> 00:34:10,050
We're here to see
Private Stephen Bainbridge.
517
00:34:10,050 --> 00:34:11,530
He's on duty right now, sir.
518
00:34:11,530 --> 00:34:13,570
But I'll certainly
let him know when he's free.
519
00:34:13,570 --> 00:34:14,890
And when will that be?
520
00:34:14,890 --> 00:34:16,810
Another hour.
521
00:34:30,370 --> 00:34:32,530
Do you think they give them classes?
522
00:34:32,530 --> 00:34:33,970
Classes?
523
00:34:33,970 --> 00:34:37,250
How to resist the temptation
to scratch their behinds.
524
00:34:37,250 --> 00:34:41,370
Afferent neurons in
the peripheral nervous system.
525
00:34:41,370 --> 00:34:42,810
Bum-itch.
526
00:34:42,810 --> 00:34:43,770
Oh.
527
00:34:48,490 --> 00:34:50,810
So why don't you see him any more?
528
00:34:50,810 --> 00:34:53,850
Who? Your previous commander, Sholto.
529
00:34:53,850 --> 00:34:55,810
Previous commander?
530
00:34:55,810 --> 00:34:57,210
I meant ex.
531
00:34:57,210 --> 00:34:59,610
"Previous" suggests that
I currently have a commander.
532
00:34:59,610 --> 00:35:03,010
Which you don't. Which I don't.
Of course you don't.
533
00:35:03,010 --> 00:35:05,130
He was decorated, wasn't he?
A war hero?
534
00:35:05,130 --> 00:35:06,530
Not to everyone.
535
00:35:07,690 --> 00:35:09,450
He led a team of crows into battle.
536
00:35:09,450 --> 00:35:10,650
Crows?
537
00:35:10,650 --> 00:35:13,770
New recruits. It's standard
procedure - break the new boys in.
538
00:35:13,770 --> 00:35:14,930
But it went wrong.
539
00:35:16,170 --> 00:35:19,010
They all died,
he was the only survivor.
540
00:35:19,010 --> 00:35:23,370
The press and families gave him hell, he gets more
death threats than you. Oh, I wouldn't count on that.
541
00:35:23,370 --> 00:35:27,210
And why have you suddenly taken
an interest in another human being?
542
00:35:27,210 --> 00:35:28,770
I'm "chatting".
543
00:35:32,810 --> 00:35:34,970
I won't be trying THAT again.
544
00:35:34,970 --> 00:35:39,090
Changing the subject completely...
545
00:35:39,090 --> 00:35:43,690
you know it won't alter anything,
right, me and Mary getting married?
546
00:35:43,690 --> 00:35:45,610
We'll still be doing all this.
547
00:35:45,610 --> 00:35:47,810
Oh, good. If you were worried.
548
00:35:47,810 --> 00:35:49,130
I wasn't worried.
549
00:35:51,130 --> 00:35:52,130
Hmm.
550
00:35:53,930 --> 00:35:56,170
The thing about Mary,
551
00:35:56,170 --> 00:35:58,530
she has completely
turned my life around.
552
00:36:00,490 --> 00:36:01,970
Changed everything.
553
00:36:03,490 --> 00:36:04,810
But, for the record,
554
00:36:04,810 --> 00:36:08,050
over the last few years there are
two people who have done that,
555
00:36:08,050 --> 00:36:11,970
and the other one is...
556
00:36:11,970 --> 00:36:13,610
a complete dickhead.
557
00:37:45,730 --> 00:37:47,690
Can I ask what this
is in connection with?
558
00:37:47,690 --> 00:37:51,890
Private Bainbridge contacted us
about a personal matter, sir.
559
00:37:51,890 --> 00:37:54,770
Nothing's personal
when it concerns my troops.
560
00:37:54,770 --> 00:37:56,810
What do you really want?
561
00:37:56,810 --> 00:37:59,650
I'm here on a legitimate enquiry.
562
00:37:59,650 --> 00:38:03,530
Are you press? Digging for some
bloody Royal story or something?
563
00:38:03,530 --> 00:38:05,490
No, sir, I'm Captain John Watson,
564
00:38:05,490 --> 00:38:07,810
Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers.
565
00:38:07,810 --> 00:38:09,370
Retired.
566
00:38:09,370 --> 00:38:12,450
You could be a used-car
salesman now, for all I know.
567
00:38:14,690 --> 00:38:16,690
Bainbridge?
568
00:38:16,690 --> 00:38:18,450
Gentleman here to see you.
569
00:38:19,970 --> 00:38:21,490
Bainbridge!
570
00:38:29,930 --> 00:38:31,730
I know you, don't I?
571
00:38:31,730 --> 00:38:32,970
Hmm?
572
00:38:35,610 --> 00:38:38,090
I've seen you in the papers.
573
00:38:38,090 --> 00:38:40,770
You hang around with that detective,
574
00:38:40,770 --> 00:38:42,450
the one with the silly hat.
575
00:38:44,170 --> 00:38:46,650
What the hell does Bainbridge
want with a detective?
576
00:38:46,650 --> 00:38:48,450
I'm afraid I'm not at liberty to say.
577
00:38:48,450 --> 00:38:51,650
You're not at liberty to say?
He's a soldier in my regiment.
578
00:38:51,650 --> 00:38:55,330
I'll be damned if he's going to get up to
cloak-and-dagger nonsense like this. Sir!
579
00:38:55,330 --> 00:38:57,970
Sir! What's going on?
It's Bainbridge, sir.
580
00:38:57,970 --> 00:38:59,010
He's dead.
581
00:39:08,290 --> 00:39:11,810
My God!
582
00:39:11,810 --> 00:39:14,770
Ah! No, let me take a look,
sir, I'm a doctor.
583
00:39:14,770 --> 00:39:15,970
What?
584
00:39:15,970 --> 00:39:17,210
Sergeant, arrest this man!
585
00:39:17,210 --> 00:39:18,650
What? No, no! I'm a doctor!
586
00:39:18,650 --> 00:39:20,690
Oh, you're a doctor
now too? Sergeant.
587
00:39:20,690 --> 00:39:21,930
Let me examine him, please!
588
00:39:21,930 --> 00:39:23,890
Sir, caught this one
snooping around.
589
00:39:23,890 --> 00:39:25,370
Is that what this is all about?
590
00:39:25,370 --> 00:39:27,570
Distracting me, so that
this man could get in here
591
00:39:27,570 --> 00:39:29,010
and kill Bainbridge? Don't be...
592
00:39:29,010 --> 00:39:31,130
Kill him with what?
Where's the weapon? What?
593
00:39:31,130 --> 00:39:33,490
Where's the weapon?
Go on, search me - no weapon.
594
00:39:33,490 --> 00:39:36,210
Bainbridge was on parade,
he came off duty five minutes ago.
595
00:39:36,210 --> 00:39:38,050
When's this supposed
to have happened?
596
00:39:38,050 --> 00:39:41,330
You obviously stabbed him before
he got into the shower. No. No?!
597
00:39:41,330 --> 00:39:45,530
He's soaking wet and there's shampoo in his hair.
He got into the shower, then someone stabbed him.
598
00:39:45,530 --> 00:39:48,290
The cubicle was locked from the
inside, sir. I had to break it open.
599
00:39:48,290 --> 00:39:51,890
You must have climbed over the top. But
then I'd be soaking wet too, wouldn't I?
600
00:39:51,890 --> 00:39:54,850
Major, please! I'm John Watson,
Fifth Northumberland Fusiliers,
601
00:39:54,850 --> 00:39:57,490
three years in Afghanistan,
a veteran of Kandahar, Helmand
602
00:39:57,490 --> 00:39:59,090
and Bart's bloody Hospital!
603
00:39:59,090 --> 00:40:00,930
Let me examine this body!
604
00:40:07,890 --> 00:40:09,490
Thank you.
605
00:40:09,490 --> 00:40:11,330
Suicide?
606
00:40:11,330 --> 00:40:13,090
No. The weapon again, no knife.
607
00:40:15,730 --> 00:40:20,010
Now, there is a wound
to the abdomen.
608
00:40:21,490 --> 00:40:22,650
Incredibly fine.
609
00:40:22,650 --> 00:40:25,130
Man stabbed to death,
no murder weapon.
610
00:40:25,130 --> 00:40:26,850
Door locked from the inside.
611
00:40:27,810 --> 00:40:29,690
Only one way in or out
of here. Sherlock...
612
00:40:29,690 --> 00:40:31,650
Hmm? He's still breathing.
613
00:40:31,650 --> 00:40:33,450
Oh, my God!
614
00:40:33,450 --> 00:40:35,570
What do we do?
Give me your scarf. What?
615
00:40:35,570 --> 00:40:37,890
Quickly, now! Call an ambulance!
616
00:40:37,890 --> 00:40:39,890
What? Call an ambulance, now!
617
00:40:39,890 --> 00:40:41,290
Do it!
618
00:40:41,290 --> 00:40:43,810
Nurse, press here, hard.
619
00:40:43,810 --> 00:40:45,210
Nurse? Yeah, I'm making do.
620
00:40:45,210 --> 00:40:47,010
Keep pressure on that wound.
621
00:40:47,010 --> 00:40:49,210
Stephen? Stephen, stay with me.
622
00:40:51,290 --> 00:40:53,370
Private Bainbridge had
just come off guard duty.
623
00:40:53,370 --> 00:40:55,770
He'd stood there for hours,
plenty of people watching,
624
00:40:55,770 --> 00:40:57,010
nothing apparently wrong.
625
00:40:57,010 --> 00:40:59,410
He came off duty and
within minutes was nearly dead
626
00:40:59,410 --> 00:41:01,570
from a wound in his stomach,
627
00:41:01,570 --> 00:41:02,930
but there was no weapon.
628
00:41:02,930 --> 00:41:04,690
Where did it go?
629
00:41:04,690 --> 00:41:07,050
Ladies and gentlemen,
I invite you to consider this -
630
00:41:07,050 --> 00:41:09,370
a murderer who can
walk through walls,
631
00:41:09,370 --> 00:41:11,610
a weapon that can vanish.
But in all of this,
632
00:41:11,610 --> 00:41:14,890
there is only one element which can
be said to be truly remarkable.
633
00:41:17,090 --> 00:41:18,730
Would anyone like to make a guess?
634
00:41:22,410 --> 00:41:23,570
Come on, come on,
635
00:41:23,570 --> 00:41:26,410
there is actually an element
of Q&A to all of this.
636
00:41:29,450 --> 00:41:32,090
Scotland Yard,
have you got a theory?
637
00:41:32,090 --> 00:41:36,250
Yeah, you, you're a detective,
broadly speaking. Got a theory?
638
00:41:36,250 --> 00:41:38,010
Er, um, if the, er...
639
00:41:38,010 --> 00:41:39,090
If the... If the...
640
00:41:39,090 --> 00:41:41,690
If the blade was
propelled through the, erm...
641
00:41:43,690 --> 00:41:46,130
...grating in the air vent,
642
00:41:46,130 --> 00:41:49,610
maybe a ballista
or a catapult, um...
643
00:41:49,610 --> 00:41:52,250
Somebody tiny could crawl in there.
644
00:41:52,250 --> 00:41:54,890
So, yeah, we're looking
for a dwarf.
645
00:41:54,890 --> 00:41:56,210
Brilliant.
646
00:41:56,210 --> 00:41:57,490
Really? No.
647
00:41:57,490 --> 00:41:58,650
Next?
648
00:41:58,650 --> 00:42:00,090
(He stabbed himself.)
649
00:42:00,090 --> 00:42:01,490
Hello, who was that?
650
00:42:01,490 --> 00:42:03,130
Tom?
651
00:42:06,090 --> 00:42:07,090
Got a theory?
652
00:42:09,650 --> 00:42:14,730
Attempted suicide, with a blade
made of compacted blood and bone.
653
00:42:14,730 --> 00:42:17,050
Broke after piercing his abdomen,
654
00:42:17,050 --> 00:42:19,490
like a meat...
655
00:42:19,490 --> 00:42:20,890
dagger.
656
00:42:20,890 --> 00:42:22,530
A meat dagger?
657
00:42:22,530 --> 00:42:24,490
Yes. (Sit down.)
658
00:42:25,730 --> 00:42:26,730
No.
659
00:42:27,810 --> 00:42:31,170
There was one feature,
and only one feature, of interest
660
00:42:31,170 --> 00:42:33,090
in the whole of this baffling case,
661
00:42:33,090 --> 00:42:36,650
and quite frankly it was
the usual - John Watson.
662
00:42:36,650 --> 00:42:40,170
Who, while I was trying to solve
a murder, instead saved a life.
663
00:42:41,810 --> 00:42:43,890
There are mysteries worth solving
664
00:42:43,890 --> 00:42:45,530
and stories worth telling.
665
00:42:47,450 --> 00:42:48,850
The best and bravest man I know
666
00:42:48,850 --> 00:42:51,130
and, on top of that,
he actually knows how to do stuff.
667
00:42:51,130 --> 00:42:53,930
Except wedding planning and
serviettes, he's rubbish at those.
668
00:42:53,930 --> 00:42:55,410
Hmm. The case itself remains
669
00:42:55,410 --> 00:42:58,890
the most ingenious and brilliantly
planned murder, or attempted murder,
670
00:42:58,890 --> 00:43:01,290
I've ever had
the pleasure to encounter.
671
00:43:01,290 --> 00:43:05,290
The most perfect locked-room
mystery of which I am aware.
672
00:43:05,290 --> 00:43:07,210
However, I'm not just here
to praise John,
673
00:43:07,210 --> 00:43:09,330
I'm also here to embarrass him,
so let's move on to...
674
00:43:09,330 --> 00:43:10,650
No, wait... How was it done?
675
00:43:10,650 --> 00:43:12,450
How was what done? The stabbing?
676
00:43:14,730 --> 00:43:16,330
I'm afraid I don't know.
677
00:43:16,330 --> 00:43:18,530
I didn't solve that one.
678
00:43:18,530 --> 00:43:22,330
It can happen sometimes,
it's very, very disappointing.
679
00:43:22,330 --> 00:43:24,850
Embarrassment leads me on
to the stag night.
680
00:43:24,850 --> 00:43:26,930
Of course there's
hours of material here,
681
00:43:26,930 --> 00:43:29,370
but I've cut it down
to the really good bits.
682
00:43:30,970 --> 00:43:32,850
Murder scenes?
683
00:43:32,850 --> 00:43:35,610
Locations of murders?
684
00:43:35,610 --> 00:43:37,050
Hmm, pub crawl, themed.
685
00:43:37,050 --> 00:43:39,570
Yeah, but why can't you just
do Underground stations?
686
00:43:39,570 --> 00:43:42,530
It lacks the personal touch. We're
going to go for a drink in every...
687
00:43:42,530 --> 00:43:44,930
In every street where you've
found a corpse. Delightful!
688
00:43:44,930 --> 00:43:46,210
Where do I come in?
689
00:43:46,210 --> 00:43:48,930
Don't want to get ill.
That would ruin it, spoil the mood.
690
00:43:48,930 --> 00:43:51,410
You're a graduate chemist,
can't you just work it out?
691
00:43:51,410 --> 00:43:53,290
I lack the practical experience.
692
00:43:54,930 --> 00:43:56,530
Meaning you think I like a drink?
693
00:43:56,530 --> 00:43:58,770
Occasionally.
That I'm a drunk. No... No.
694
00:44:02,890 --> 00:44:05,370
You look... well.
695
00:44:05,370 --> 00:44:07,050
I am.
696
00:44:07,050 --> 00:44:08,530
How's...
697
00:44:11,170 --> 00:44:12,930
Tom?
698
00:44:12,930 --> 00:44:14,050
Not a sociopath.
699
00:44:14,050 --> 00:44:15,130
Still? Good.
700
00:44:15,130 --> 00:44:17,290
And we're having quite a lot of sex.
701
00:44:19,930 --> 00:44:23,490
OK. I want you to calculate
John's ideal intake, and mine,
702
00:44:23,490 --> 00:44:25,650
to remain in the sweet spot
for the whole evening.
703
00:44:25,650 --> 00:44:26,810
Light-headed - good.
704
00:44:26,810 --> 00:44:29,290
Urinating in wardrobes - bad.
705
00:44:29,290 --> 00:44:30,570
Hmm.
706
00:44:30,570 --> 00:44:33,090
Two, erm... beers, please.
707
00:44:33,090 --> 00:44:34,170
Pints?
708
00:44:34,170 --> 00:44:36,970
443.7 millilitres.
709
00:44:39,850 --> 00:44:40,970
Ah.
710
00:44:45,290 --> 00:44:47,170
What, are we on a schedule?
711
00:44:48,330 --> 00:44:49,850
You'll thank me.
712
00:45:06,130 --> 00:45:07,730
Cheers. Cheers.
713
00:45:13,970 --> 00:45:15,170
Over there. What?
714
00:45:15,170 --> 00:45:17,450
Toilets - any second now
you're going to need...
715
00:45:17,450 --> 00:45:20,010
Hang on, tell me after.
I need the loo. Hmm, on schedule.
716
00:45:20,010 --> 00:45:22,490
Eh? Nothing. Go!
717
00:45:27,770 --> 00:45:29,450
How long? Sorry?
718
00:45:29,450 --> 00:45:30,930
Your visit.
719
00:45:30,930 --> 00:45:34,290
Estimate approximate
volume discharge...
720
00:45:34,290 --> 00:45:35,690
Stop talking now.
721
00:45:39,930 --> 00:45:43,530
Oh, quick, one more. He mustn't see.
722
00:45:52,930 --> 00:45:54,730
Here you go. Cheers.
723
00:45:58,050 --> 00:46:03,010
I know ash! Don't tell me I don't!
724
00:46:05,810 --> 00:46:09,770
All right, enough!
That's... Stand up.
725
00:46:11,650 --> 00:46:14,970
Ash. I know ash.
726
00:46:19,880 --> 00:46:22,040
I have an international reputation.
727
00:46:24,080 --> 00:46:26,720
Do you have
an international reputation?
728
00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:29,920
No, I don't have
an international reputation. No.
729
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:34,640
And I can't even remember what for.
730
00:46:37,880 --> 00:46:42,640
It's crime... something or other.
731
00:46:44,800 --> 00:46:47,040
Oh, what are you doing back?
732
00:46:47,040 --> 00:46:48,840
I thought you were
going to be up late.
733
00:46:48,840 --> 00:46:50,920
Ah, Hudders. What time is it?
734
00:46:52,320 --> 00:46:53,920
You've only been out two hours.
735
00:47:05,400 --> 00:47:06,920
Am I a vegetable?
736
00:47:06,920 --> 00:47:09,560
You or the... thing...? Pffrrrt!
737
00:47:11,080 --> 00:47:12,200
Funny!
738
00:47:12,200 --> 00:47:13,440
Thank you.
739
00:47:13,440 --> 00:47:16,640
Come on. No, you're not
a vegetable. It's your go.
740
00:47:18,320 --> 00:47:19,720
Erm...
741
00:47:19,720 --> 00:47:21,800
am I human?
742
00:47:21,800 --> 00:47:23,040
Sometimes.
743
00:47:23,040 --> 00:47:24,400
Can't have sometimes.
744
00:47:24,400 --> 00:47:25,600
It has to be, um...
745
00:47:25,600 --> 00:47:29,200
Yes, you're human.
Yes, I know, OK. And am I a man?
746
00:47:29,200 --> 00:47:30,680
Yep. Tall?
747
00:47:32,320 --> 00:47:33,920
Not as tall as people think.
748
00:47:33,920 --> 00:47:35,600
Hmm. Nice?
749
00:47:35,600 --> 00:47:37,080
Ish.
750
00:47:37,080 --> 00:47:38,160
Clever?
751
00:47:38,160 --> 00:47:39,200
I would say so.
752
00:47:39,200 --> 00:47:40,480
You would.
753
00:47:40,480 --> 00:47:42,320
Hmm, am I important?
754
00:47:42,320 --> 00:47:43,880
To some people.
755
00:47:43,880 --> 00:47:46,560
Do people like me?
756
00:47:46,560 --> 00:47:48,360
Erm, no they don't.
757
00:47:48,360 --> 00:47:51,400
You tend to rub them up
the wrong way.
758
00:47:51,400 --> 00:47:53,000
OK.
759
00:47:53,000 --> 00:47:55,080
Am I the current King of England?
760
00:47:57,360 --> 00:47:59,120
You know we don't have a King.
761
00:47:59,120 --> 00:48:01,280
Don't we? No.
762
00:48:01,280 --> 00:48:03,240
Your go.
763
00:48:09,920 --> 00:48:12,520
I don't mind. Am I a woman?
764
00:48:14,560 --> 00:48:16,600
What?
765
00:48:17,600 --> 00:48:18,840
Yes.
766
00:48:18,840 --> 00:48:21,560
Am I... pretty?
767
00:48:22,920 --> 00:48:24,160
This?
768
00:48:25,920 --> 00:48:29,040
Beauty is a construct based
entirely on childhood impressions,
769
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:30,800
influences and role models.
770
00:48:30,800 --> 00:48:33,280
Yeah, but am I a pretty lady?
771
00:48:35,800 --> 00:48:39,360
I don't know who you are, I don't
know who you're supposed to be.
772
00:48:39,360 --> 00:48:40,560
You picked the name!
773
00:48:40,560 --> 00:48:42,600
But I picked it at random
from the papers.
774
00:48:42,600 --> 00:48:46,000
You're not really getting the hang
of this game, are you, Sherlock?
775
00:48:46,000 --> 00:48:50,440
So I am human, I'm not as tall
as people think I am. I'm...
776
00:48:50,440 --> 00:48:52,560
I'm nice-ish, clever,
777
00:48:52,560 --> 00:48:54,160
important to some people.
778
00:48:54,160 --> 00:48:57,000
But I tend to rub them up
the wrong way.
779
00:48:58,560 --> 00:49:00,000
Got it.
780
00:49:00,000 --> 00:49:01,720
Go on, then. I'm you, aren't I?
781
00:49:01,720 --> 00:49:02,520
Client!
782
00:49:04,680 --> 00:49:06,000
Hello.
783
00:49:06,000 --> 00:49:08,200
Hello. Come on.
784
00:49:08,200 --> 00:49:10,200
Which one of you is Sherlock Holmes?
785
00:49:15,680 --> 00:49:17,360
I don't... a lot.
786
00:49:17,360 --> 00:49:20,360
I mean, I don't date all that much.
787
00:49:20,360 --> 00:49:25,320
And he seemed nice, you know?
788
00:49:25,320 --> 00:49:28,200
We seemed to automatically connect.
789
00:49:28,200 --> 00:49:29,640
We had one night,
790
00:49:29,640 --> 00:49:33,360
dinner, such interesting
conversation.
791
00:49:33,360 --> 00:49:35,600
It was lovely.
792
00:49:35,600 --> 00:49:37,120
To be honest,
793
00:49:37,120 --> 00:49:39,880
I'd love to have gone further,
794
00:49:39,880 --> 00:49:44,080
but I thought, no, this is special,
795
00:49:44,080 --> 00:49:45,840
let's take it slowly.
796
00:49:45,840 --> 00:49:47,400
Exchanged numbers,
797
00:49:47,400 --> 00:49:49,920
he said he'd get in touch
and then...
798
00:49:53,200 --> 00:49:58,840
Maybe he wasn't quite
as keen as I was,
799
00:49:58,840 --> 00:50:02,360
but I just thought
800
00:50:02,360 --> 00:50:05,640
at least he'd call
to say that we were finished.
801
00:50:12,600 --> 00:50:14,720
I went round there,
802
00:50:14,720 --> 00:50:18,040
to his flat, no trace of him.
803
00:50:18,040 --> 00:50:22,480
Mr Holmes, I honestly think
804
00:50:22,480 --> 00:50:26,600
I had dinner with a ghost.
805
00:50:30,680 --> 00:50:32,280
Mr Holmes?
806
00:50:37,480 --> 00:50:39,400
With a ghost, Mr Holmes!
807
00:50:39,400 --> 00:50:42,320
Boring, boring, boring.
No...
808
00:50:42,320 --> 00:50:43,880
fascinating.
809
00:50:45,120 --> 00:50:46,800
John. John! Wake up.
810
00:50:46,800 --> 00:50:50,400
I apologise about my...
You know... Him.
811
00:50:50,400 --> 00:50:51,760
Rude. Rude!
812
00:50:53,440 --> 00:50:55,560
I checked with the landlord
813
00:50:55,560 --> 00:50:58,760
and the man who lived there died.
814
00:50:58,760 --> 00:51:00,640
Heart attack.
815
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:04,600
And there we are
having dinner one week on.
816
00:51:04,600 --> 00:51:08,040
And I found this thing online,
817
00:51:08,040 --> 00:51:10,520
a sort of chatroom thing,
818
00:51:10,520 --> 00:51:14,760
for girls who think they're dating
men from the spirit world.
819
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:18,200
Don't worry, I'll find him
in ten minutes.
820
00:51:18,200 --> 00:51:19,480
What's your dog's name?
821
00:51:19,480 --> 00:51:22,120
Yeah, I'm there if you want it...
John, wake up.
822
00:51:22,120 --> 00:51:24,640
Went to... Yeah.
823
00:51:24,640 --> 00:51:26,320
The game is... something.
824
00:51:27,320 --> 00:51:28,400
On?
825
00:51:28,400 --> 00:51:30,040
Yeah, that, that.
826
00:51:30,040 --> 00:51:31,200
OK.
827
00:51:40,560 --> 00:51:42,680
Oh, it's nice.
828
00:51:42,680 --> 00:51:44,400
Nice place.
829
00:51:49,480 --> 00:51:51,600
See anything? Hmm?
830
00:51:51,600 --> 00:51:53,320
Any clues, Mr Holmes?
831
00:51:53,320 --> 00:51:55,360
Oh, errrm...
832
00:52:16,480 --> 00:52:18,320
I'm just going to whip this out.
833
00:52:35,280 --> 00:52:38,040
You all right?
Hmm? Yeah, he's clueing. What?
834
00:52:38,040 --> 00:52:39,960
He's... Hmm? He's clueing for looks.
835
00:52:51,200 --> 00:52:53,040
Mr Holmes?
836
00:52:58,080 --> 00:53:00,680
Mr Holmes! I'm calling
the police. Oh, no...
837
00:53:00,680 --> 00:53:02,400
Whoa, whoa, whoa!
838
00:53:02,400 --> 00:53:04,640
No, look, this is
a famous detective,
839
00:53:04,640 --> 00:53:07,440
it's Sherlock Holmes and
his partner, John Hamish Watson.
840
00:53:07,440 --> 00:53:08,840
What do you think you're doing?
841
00:53:08,840 --> 00:53:11,200
Don't compromise
842
00:53:11,200 --> 00:53:13,560
the integrity of the...
843
00:53:18,800 --> 00:53:20,040
Crime scene.
844
00:53:26,240 --> 00:53:27,880
Yeah, that.
845
00:53:47,880 --> 00:53:49,160
Wakey-wakey!
846
00:53:49,600 --> 00:53:50,880
Oh, my God.
847
00:53:50,880 --> 00:53:52,760
Greg... Is that Greg?
848
00:53:52,760 --> 00:53:55,160
Get up. I'm going to
put you two in a taxi.
849
00:53:55,160 --> 00:53:57,840
I managed to square things
with the desk sergeant.
850
00:53:57,840 --> 00:54:00,360
Ha! What a couple of lightweights -
851
00:54:00,360 --> 00:54:02,400
you couldn't even make it
to closing time!
852
00:54:02,400 --> 00:54:03,920
- Can you whisper?
- Not really!
853
00:54:07,800 --> 00:54:09,640
Come on.
854
00:54:21,360 --> 00:54:24,720
Well, thanks for a...
855
00:54:24,720 --> 00:54:27,080
You know... an evening.
856
00:54:27,080 --> 00:54:28,080
It was awful.
857
00:54:28,080 --> 00:54:31,160
Yeah. I was going to pretend, but...
858
00:54:31,160 --> 00:54:32,800
it was, truly.
859
00:54:32,800 --> 00:54:34,200
That woman, Tessa...
860
00:54:34,200 --> 00:54:35,440
What?
861
00:54:35,440 --> 00:54:37,920
Dated a ghost, most interesting
case for months.
862
00:54:37,920 --> 00:54:39,480
What a wasted opportunity!
863
00:54:41,000 --> 00:54:42,520
OK.
864
00:54:48,520 --> 00:54:49,920
How are you feeling?
865
00:54:49,920 --> 00:54:51,280
Hmm.
866
00:54:52,680 --> 00:54:54,760
It's just like old times,
having you back here.
867
00:54:54,760 --> 00:54:59,040
I thought I'd make your
favourite, one last time.
868
00:54:59,040 --> 00:55:01,960
Oh. Don't sound so final about it,
869
00:55:01,960 --> 00:55:04,880
I will be visiting, you know.
Ooh, I've heard that one before!
870
00:55:04,880 --> 00:55:06,920
No, it's different now,
though, isn't it?
871
00:55:06,920 --> 00:55:09,040
It's different to when
we thought we'd lost him.
872
00:55:09,040 --> 00:55:11,240
Well, marriage
changes everything, John.
873
00:55:11,240 --> 00:55:15,240
Does it? Yeah. You might not
think it, but it does.
874
00:55:15,240 --> 00:55:17,320
It's a different phase in your life.
875
00:55:17,320 --> 00:55:18,600
You meet knew people,
876
00:55:18,600 --> 00:55:20,240
cos you're a couple,
877
00:55:20,240 --> 00:55:24,200
and then you just let
your old friends slip away.
878
00:55:24,200 --> 00:55:27,400
It won't be like that.
Well, if you've found the right one,
879
00:55:27,400 --> 00:55:30,480
the person that you click with,
it's the best thing in the world.
880
00:55:30,480 --> 00:55:33,520
Well, I have. I know I have.
Oh, I'm sure.
881
00:55:33,520 --> 00:55:34,720
She's lovely.
882
00:55:34,720 --> 00:55:37,040
Yeah, I think so. What about you?
883
00:55:37,040 --> 00:55:38,320
Me?
884
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:41,600
Did you think you'd found the right
one when you married Mr Hudson?
885
00:55:41,600 --> 00:55:44,680
No. It was just
a whirlwind thing for us.
886
00:55:44,680 --> 00:55:47,960
I knew it wouldn't work, but I just
got sort of swept along. Right.
887
00:55:47,960 --> 00:55:50,160
And then we moved to Florida.
888
00:55:50,160 --> 00:55:51,600
We had a fantastic time,
889
00:55:51,600 --> 00:55:54,840
but of course I didn't know
what he was up to. (The drugs.)
890
00:55:54,840 --> 00:55:57,200
Drugs?! He was running, erm...
891
00:55:57,200 --> 00:55:59,160
Oh, what do you call it?
892
00:55:59,160 --> 00:56:01,360
Erm... A...
893
00:56:01,360 --> 00:56:03,200
cartel.
894
00:56:03,200 --> 00:56:05,200
And got in with a really bad crowd.
895
00:56:05,200 --> 00:56:08,480
Right. And then I found out
about all the other women.
896
00:56:08,480 --> 00:56:10,280
I didn't have a clue.
897
00:56:10,280 --> 00:56:14,680
So, when he was actually arrested
for blowing someone's head off,
898
00:56:14,680 --> 00:56:18,160
it was quite a relief, to be honest.
899
00:56:19,600 --> 00:56:20,760
Oh.
900
00:56:20,760 --> 00:56:23,880
It was purely physical
between me and Frank.
901
00:56:23,880 --> 00:56:26,240
We couldn't keep
our hands off each other.
902
00:56:26,240 --> 00:56:28,800
I know, there was one night...
903
00:56:28,800 --> 00:56:30,240
Oh, is that Sherlock?
904
00:56:30,880 --> 00:56:32,080
Is it?
905
00:56:32,080 --> 00:56:33,320
That's Sherlock.
906
00:56:38,360 --> 00:56:40,000
Urgh...
907
00:56:53,800 --> 00:56:55,600
There are going to be others.
908
00:56:55,600 --> 00:56:58,640
Others? Victims, women.
909
00:56:58,640 --> 00:57:00,760
Most ghosts tend to
haunt a single house.
910
00:57:00,760 --> 00:57:03,320
This ghost, however,
is willing to commute. Look.
911
00:57:24,840 --> 00:57:26,320
Hmm...
912
00:57:26,320 --> 00:57:28,240
Not you. Not you.
913
00:57:28,240 --> 00:57:30,440
Not you. Not you. Not you. Not you.
914
00:57:30,440 --> 00:57:32,560
Not you. Not you.
915
00:57:32,560 --> 00:57:34,400
Not you.
916
00:57:34,400 --> 00:57:35,960
Not you. Not you.
917
00:57:35,960 --> 00:57:37,440
Hmm...
918
00:57:37,440 --> 00:57:39,080
Not you.
919
00:57:39,080 --> 00:57:42,480
Not you. Not you. Not you.
Not you. Not you. Not you.
920
00:57:42,480 --> 00:57:44,880
Not you. Not you.
Not you. Not you. Not you.
921
00:57:44,880 --> 00:57:46,040
Not you, you, you, or you, or you.
922
00:57:46,040 --> 00:57:50,320
Or not you, not you, not you,
not you, not you, not you.
923
00:57:50,320 --> 00:57:53,080
Not you.
924
00:57:59,680 --> 00:58:01,520
Hi.
925
00:58:01,520 --> 00:58:03,040
Gail.
926
00:58:08,360 --> 00:58:09,880
Charlotte.
927
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:13,600
Robyn.
928
00:58:16,120 --> 00:58:17,640
Vicky.
929
00:58:25,320 --> 00:58:27,400
How did you meet?
930
00:58:27,400 --> 00:58:29,640
Came up to me in a pub.
Same gym as me.
931
00:58:29,640 --> 00:58:31,680
We just got chatting on the bus.
932
00:58:31,680 --> 00:58:32,760
Online.
933
00:58:32,760 --> 00:58:34,760
Name? Told you.
934
00:58:34,760 --> 00:58:36,560
His name. Oscar.
935
00:58:36,560 --> 00:58:38,440
Mike. Terry.
936
00:58:38,440 --> 00:58:41,000
Erm... Love Monkey.
937
00:58:41,000 --> 00:58:42,760
Your place?
938
00:58:42,760 --> 00:58:44,040
His place.
939
00:58:45,240 --> 00:58:46,480
Address?
940
00:58:50,680 --> 00:58:51,880
Nothing happened.
941
00:58:51,880 --> 00:58:54,960
It was just... very romantic.
942
00:58:54,960 --> 00:58:57,680
Four women in four nights.
He must have something special.
943
00:58:57,680 --> 00:58:59,360
He was very charming. He listened.
944
00:58:59,360 --> 00:59:00,520
He was sweet.
945
00:59:00,520 --> 00:59:01,840
He had a lovely...
946
00:59:01,840 --> 00:59:03,880
You OK?
947
00:59:03,880 --> 00:59:07,400
You've let your food go cold.
Mrs Hudson will play hell.
948
00:59:07,400 --> 00:59:08,680
Not now, John.
949
00:59:12,160 --> 00:59:14,160
Sorry about that.
950
00:59:14,160 --> 00:59:15,760
He had a lovely manner.
951
00:59:15,760 --> 00:59:18,800
Different names,
different addresses.
952
00:59:18,800 --> 00:59:20,160
Describe him.
953
00:59:20,160 --> 00:59:21,240
Short blonde hair.
954
00:59:21,240 --> 00:59:22,640
Dark hair. Long.
955
00:59:22,640 --> 00:59:24,280
Ginger. I like gingers.
956
00:59:24,280 --> 00:59:25,480
Couldn't tell.
957
00:59:25,480 --> 00:59:27,360
He had a mask on.
958
00:59:29,360 --> 00:59:31,440
He's stealing
the identity of corpses,
959
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:34,720
getting their names
from the obituary columns.
960
00:59:34,720 --> 00:59:36,040
All single men.
961
00:59:36,040 --> 00:59:37,480
He's using the dead man's flat
962
00:59:37,480 --> 00:59:40,120
under the assumption
it will be empty for a while.
963
00:59:40,120 --> 00:59:41,480
Free love nest.
964
00:59:41,480 --> 00:59:42,480
I feel sick.
965
00:59:42,480 --> 00:59:43,480
It's gruesome.
966
00:59:43,480 --> 00:59:45,400
That's awful. Clever...
967
00:59:45,400 --> 00:59:46,240
Bastard!
968
00:59:50,480 --> 00:59:52,760
Hello, Tessa.
969
00:59:52,760 --> 00:59:54,240
Meanwhile, back to business.
970
00:59:54,240 --> 00:59:56,000
No-one wants to use
a dead man's home.
971
00:59:57,400 --> 00:59:59,440
At least not until
it's been cleared.
972
00:59:59,440 --> 01:00:02,600
So, he disguises himself.
973
01:00:02,600 --> 01:00:05,520
Steals the man's home,
steals his identity.
974
01:00:05,520 --> 01:00:08,160
But only for one night.
Then he's gone.
975
01:00:08,160 --> 01:00:10,320
He's not a ghost, John.
He's a Mayfly.
976
01:00:10,320 --> 01:00:11,680
He lives for a day.
977
01:00:12,880 --> 01:00:16,800
So, what was it
he was looking for?
978
01:00:16,800 --> 01:00:17,840
Job?
979
01:00:17,840 --> 01:00:19,320
Gardener. Cook.
980
01:00:19,320 --> 01:00:20,920
Private nurse. I do security work.
981
01:00:20,920 --> 01:00:22,120
Maid.
982
01:00:23,400 --> 01:00:25,280
Obvious. You all work
for the same person.
983
01:00:39,760 --> 01:00:42,200
No, no, not the same employer. Damn!
984
01:00:42,200 --> 01:00:43,600
Come on, we can do this.
985
01:00:43,600 --> 01:00:44,720
Ideal night out?
986
01:00:44,720 --> 01:00:46,040
Clay-pigeon shooting.
987
01:00:46,040 --> 01:00:47,160
Line dancing.
988
01:00:47,160 --> 01:00:48,240
Pictures.
989
01:00:48,240 --> 01:00:50,040
Wine in front of the telly.
990
01:00:50,040 --> 01:00:51,760
Dungeon.
991
01:00:52,840 --> 01:00:54,680
Make-up? Clarins.
992
01:00:54,680 --> 01:00:56,080
No7.
993
01:00:56,080 --> 01:00:58,120
Maybelline. Nothing special.
994
01:00:58,120 --> 01:00:59,080
Whatever's cheap.
995
01:00:59,080 --> 01:01:00,760
Perfume?
996
01:01:00,760 --> 01:01:02,840
Chanel. Chanel. Chanel.
997
01:01:02,840 --> 01:01:05,280
Chanel. Estee Lauder.
998
01:01:06,480 --> 01:01:07,920
Ideal man?
999
01:01:07,920 --> 01:01:09,200
George Clooney.
1000
01:01:09,200 --> 01:01:10,720
Oh...! Home-loving.
1001
01:01:10,720 --> 01:01:12,680
He'd have to like cuddling.
1002
01:01:12,680 --> 01:01:15,240
Caring. Ten things.
1003
01:01:15,240 --> 01:01:17,440
One - someone who isn't
competitive with other men.
1004
01:01:17,440 --> 01:01:19,560
Two - someone who isn't constantly
1005
01:01:19,560 --> 01:01:23,040
trying to define himself
by his masculinity...
1006
01:01:23,040 --> 01:01:25,440
There's a unifying factor,
1007
01:01:25,440 --> 01:01:26,880
there has to be.
1008
01:01:26,880 --> 01:01:28,760
None of you reported
anything stolen.
1009
01:01:31,040 --> 01:01:34,840
Security guard, gardener, cook,
maid, private nurse.
1010
01:01:34,840 --> 01:01:36,720
He's romancing his way
up a pecking order.
1011
01:01:36,720 --> 01:01:39,680
Somebody's pecking order.
Come on, think. Unless...
1012
01:01:40,800 --> 01:01:42,800
Do you have a secret
you've never told anyone?
1013
01:01:42,800 --> 01:01:44,320
No.
1014
01:01:44,320 --> 01:01:46,200
Gotcha! What do you mean?
1015
01:01:46,200 --> 01:01:48,680
Everyone has secrets and
they all replied too quickly.
1016
01:01:48,680 --> 01:01:51,480
Got to go. See you. No... Wait!
Bye-bye. Wait!
1017
01:01:51,480 --> 01:01:54,200
Sorry, sexy, some secrets
have to stay secret.
1018
01:01:54,200 --> 01:01:56,000
Enjoy the wedding.
1019
01:01:58,400 --> 01:02:01,840
Why? WHY would he date all of those
women and not return their calls?
1020
01:02:01,840 --> 01:02:04,360
You're missing
the obvious, mate. Am I?
1021
01:02:04,360 --> 01:02:05,800
He's a man.
1022
01:02:05,800 --> 01:02:07,880
But why would he
change his identity?
1023
01:02:07,880 --> 01:02:09,280
Maybe he's married.
1024
01:02:11,240 --> 01:02:12,520
Oh...
1025
01:02:12,520 --> 01:02:14,200
Married.
1026
01:02:14,200 --> 01:02:15,320
Obvious, really.
1027
01:02:15,320 --> 01:02:17,040
Our Mayfly Man
was trying to escape
1028
01:02:17,040 --> 01:02:18,760
the suffocating
chains of domesticity
1029
01:02:18,760 --> 01:02:21,000
and instead of endless nights in
watching the telly
1030
01:02:21,000 --> 01:02:24,680
or going to barbecues with the awful,
dreadful, boring people he couldn't stand,
1031
01:02:24,680 --> 01:02:28,080
he used his wits, cleverness and powers
of disguise to play the field. He was...
1032
01:02:30,800 --> 01:02:32,440
On second thoughts,
1033
01:02:32,440 --> 01:02:35,440
I probably should have told you
about the elephant in the room.
1034
01:02:35,440 --> 01:02:38,080
However, it does help
to further illustrate
1035
01:02:38,080 --> 01:02:39,960
how invaluable John is to me.
1036
01:02:39,960 --> 01:02:43,640
I can read a crime scene the way
he can understand a human being.
1037
01:02:43,640 --> 01:02:46,600
I used to think that's what made me
special - quite frankly I still do.
1038
01:02:46,600 --> 01:02:47,800
But a word to the wise,
1039
01:02:47,800 --> 01:02:50,640
should any of you require
the services of either of us,
1040
01:02:50,640 --> 01:02:52,480
I will solve your murder,
1041
01:02:52,480 --> 01:02:55,360
but it takes John Watson
to save your life.
1042
01:02:55,360 --> 01:02:56,960
Trust me on that, I should know,
1043
01:02:56,960 --> 01:02:59,200
he's saved mine so many times
and in so many ways.
1044
01:03:01,640 --> 01:03:05,280
This blog is the story of two men
1045
01:03:05,280 --> 01:03:08,760
and their, frankly,
ridiculous adventures
1046
01:03:08,760 --> 01:03:11,640
of murder, mystery and mayhem.
1047
01:03:13,480 --> 01:03:16,440
But from now on,
there's a new story.
1048
01:03:17,920 --> 01:03:19,840
A bigger adventure.
1049
01:03:21,440 --> 01:03:22,760
Ladies and gentlemen,
1050
01:03:22,760 --> 01:03:27,360
pray, charge your glasses
and be upstanding.
1051
01:03:27,360 --> 01:03:29,400
Today begin the adventures
1052
01:03:29,400 --> 01:03:31,280
of Mary Elizabeth Watson
1053
01:03:31,280 --> 01:03:33,120
and John Hamish Watson.
1054
01:03:33,120 --> 01:03:37,240
The two reasons why
every single one of us is...
1055
01:03:54,960 --> 01:03:56,120
What did you say?
1056
01:03:56,120 --> 01:03:59,560
You said...
1057
01:03:59,560 --> 01:04:02,800
"John Hamish Watson."
1058
01:04:02,800 --> 01:04:05,240
You said that. You said "Hamish."
1059
01:04:06,640 --> 01:04:08,760
This is a famous detective,
it's Sherlock Holmes
1060
01:04:08,760 --> 01:04:10,560
and his partner, John Hamish Watson.
1061
01:04:10,560 --> 01:04:12,480
How did you know?
1062
01:04:12,480 --> 01:04:14,680
How did YOU know his middle name?
1063
01:04:14,680 --> 01:04:16,800
He never tells anyone, he hates it.
1064
01:04:20,760 --> 01:04:22,680
John "H" Watson?
1065
01:04:22,680 --> 01:04:24,120
Yep.
1066
01:04:31,160 --> 01:04:33,440
Henry? Shut up.
1067
01:04:33,440 --> 01:04:34,680
Humphrey?
1068
01:04:34,680 --> 01:04:36,400
Shut up.
1069
01:04:36,400 --> 01:04:37,200
SHOWER RUNS Higgins?
1070
01:04:39,240 --> 01:04:41,320
'Go away!'
1071
01:04:41,320 --> 01:04:44,000
It took him years to confide in me.
1072
01:04:44,000 --> 01:04:46,360
Oh...
1073
01:04:46,360 --> 01:04:48,120
That's my birth certificate.
1074
01:04:48,120 --> 01:04:49,360
Yep.
1075
01:04:53,760 --> 01:04:56,000
And the woman - she knew.
1076
01:04:58,200 --> 01:04:59,920
Hamish.
1077
01:05:01,280 --> 01:05:02,960
John Hamish Watson,
1078
01:05:02,960 --> 01:05:06,000
just if you were
looking for baby names.
1079
01:05:06,000 --> 01:05:07,840
God knows where she is.
1080
01:05:12,640 --> 01:05:14,560
Out of my head, I am busy!
1081
01:05:16,080 --> 01:05:18,440
There's only one time
that name's been made public.
1082
01:05:18,440 --> 01:05:20,360
Does it have to be on the invitation?
1083
01:05:20,360 --> 01:05:22,360
It's your name.
1084
01:05:22,360 --> 01:05:24,120
It's traditional... It's funny...
1085
01:05:27,200 --> 01:05:28,680
'Enjoy the wedding...'
1086
01:05:33,360 --> 01:05:34,800
Enjoy the wedding.
1087
01:05:34,800 --> 01:05:36,920
The wedding.
You knew about the wedding.
1088
01:05:36,920 --> 01:05:39,440
More importantly, you'd seen
a wedding invitation.
1089
01:05:39,440 --> 01:05:41,680
Now barely 100 people
had seen that invitation.
1090
01:05:41,680 --> 01:05:43,800
The Mayfly Man only saw five women.
1091
01:05:43,800 --> 01:05:45,960
For one person
to be in both groups...
1092
01:05:45,960 --> 01:05:47,560
could be a coincidence.
1093
01:05:47,560 --> 01:05:49,680
Oh, Sherlock!
1094
01:05:49,680 --> 01:05:51,880
What do we say about coincidences?
1095
01:05:51,880 --> 01:05:53,320
The universe is rarely so lazy.
1096
01:05:53,320 --> 01:05:56,360
So, the balance of probability is?
Someone went to great lengths
1097
01:05:56,360 --> 01:06:00,720
to find out something about this wedding. What great lengths?
They lied. Assumed false identities.
1098
01:06:00,720 --> 01:06:02,680
Which suggests? Criminal intent.
1099
01:06:02,680 --> 01:06:03,920
Also suggests?
1100
01:06:03,920 --> 01:06:05,320
Intelligence, planning.
1101
01:06:05,320 --> 01:06:07,760
Clearly. But more importantly?
1102
01:06:09,280 --> 01:06:10,640
The Mayfly Man.
1103
01:06:11,800 --> 01:06:13,040
The Mayfly Man is...
1104
01:06:13,040 --> 01:06:15,240
Here today!
1105
01:06:15,240 --> 01:06:18,040
Ooh, sorry. I...
1106
01:06:19,520 --> 01:06:20,680
Another glass, sir?
1107
01:06:20,680 --> 01:06:22,480
Thank you, yes, thank you. Yes.
1108
01:06:22,480 --> 01:06:24,760
Something's going to happen,
right here.
1109
01:06:28,080 --> 01:06:29,200
Now, where were we?
1110
01:06:29,200 --> 01:06:30,120
Could be any second.
1111
01:06:33,960 --> 01:06:35,320
You have control of the room.
1112
01:06:35,320 --> 01:06:36,880
Ah, yes.
1113
01:06:36,880 --> 01:06:40,000
Raising glasses and standing up.
Very good. Thank you.
1114
01:06:40,000 --> 01:06:41,440
Don't lose it.
1115
01:06:41,440 --> 01:06:43,720
And down again.
1116
01:06:51,680 --> 01:06:52,840
Ladies and gentlemen,
1117
01:06:52,840 --> 01:06:55,160
people tell you not
to milk a good speech.
1118
01:06:55,160 --> 01:06:57,560
Get off early, leave 'em laughing.
1119
01:06:59,080 --> 01:07:01,800
Wise advice I'll certainly
try to bear in mind.
1120
01:07:01,800 --> 01:07:03,040
But for now...
1121
01:07:03,040 --> 01:07:04,680
part two!
1122
01:07:04,680 --> 01:07:07,200
Part two is more action-based.
1123
01:07:07,200 --> 01:07:10,920
I'm going to walk around,
shake things up a bit.
1124
01:07:10,920 --> 01:07:13,720
Who'd go to a wedding?
That's the question.
1125
01:07:13,720 --> 01:07:16,360
Who would bother
to go to any lengths
1126
01:07:16,360 --> 01:07:18,400
to get themselves to a wedding?
1127
01:07:20,000 --> 01:07:21,280
Well, everyone.
1128
01:07:21,280 --> 01:07:23,840
Weddings are great, love a wedding.
What's he doing?
1129
01:07:23,840 --> 01:07:25,600
Something's wrong.
1130
01:07:25,600 --> 01:07:27,120
And John's great too.
1131
01:07:27,120 --> 01:07:29,760
Haven't said that enough,
barely scratched the surface.
1132
01:07:29,760 --> 01:07:31,120
I could go on all night
1133
01:07:31,120 --> 01:07:35,440
about the depth and complexity
of his jumpers,
1134
01:07:35,440 --> 01:07:37,760
and he can cook.
1135
01:07:37,760 --> 01:07:41,320
Does... erm... a thing.
A thing with peas...
1136
01:07:42,560 --> 01:07:44,800
Once. Might not be peas,
might not be him.
1137
01:07:44,800 --> 01:07:47,800
But he's got a great singing voice,
or somebody does.
1138
01:07:47,800 --> 01:07:50,080
Too many, too many,
too many, too many!
1139
01:07:51,440 --> 01:07:54,200
Sorry, too many jokes about John.
1140
01:07:54,200 --> 01:07:57,200
Now... Criminal intent.
1141
01:07:57,200 --> 01:07:58,880
Where was I? Ah, yes.
1142
01:07:58,880 --> 01:08:00,720
Extraordinary lengths.
1143
01:08:00,720 --> 01:08:02,440
Speech. Speech.
1144
01:08:02,440 --> 01:08:04,160
Let's talk about...
1145
01:08:04,160 --> 01:08:06,640
All of which is suggestive of...
1146
01:08:07,880 --> 01:08:10,720
Murder! Sorry, did I say murder?
1147
01:08:10,720 --> 01:08:12,000
I meant to say marriage.
1148
01:08:12,000 --> 01:08:14,600
But, you know,
they're quite similar procedures,
1149
01:08:14,600 --> 01:08:15,840
when you think about it.
1150
01:08:15,840 --> 01:08:17,680
The participants tend
to know each other
1151
01:08:17,680 --> 01:08:19,440
and it's over
when one of them's dead.
1152
01:08:19,440 --> 01:08:22,920
In fairness, murder is a lot quicker
though. Janine, what about this one?
1153
01:08:22,920 --> 01:08:26,920
Acceptably hot? More importantly, his
girlfriend's wearing new uncomfortable underwear
1154
01:08:26,920 --> 01:08:31,080
and hasn't bothered to pick this thread off his
jacket, or point out the grease smudge on his neck.
1155
01:08:31,080 --> 01:08:33,720
He's going home alone.
Also he's a comics and sci-fi geek,
1156
01:08:33,720 --> 01:08:36,680
they're always tremendously
grateful, really put the hours in.
1157
01:08:36,680 --> 01:08:38,320
Jeff, the gents.
1158
01:08:38,320 --> 01:08:39,600
Loos now, please.
1159
01:08:39,600 --> 01:08:42,560
Greg. The loos, please. Why?
1160
01:08:42,560 --> 01:08:44,800
Oh, I don't know,
maybe it's your TURN.
1161
01:08:45,880 --> 01:08:47,800
Yeah, actually,
now you mention it.
1162
01:08:47,800 --> 01:08:50,600
Sherlock, any chance of a...
An end date for this speech?
1163
01:08:50,600 --> 01:08:51,680
Got to cut the cake.
1164
01:08:51,680 --> 01:08:53,720
Oh, ladies and gentlemen,
1165
01:08:53,720 --> 01:08:56,480
can't stand it when I finally
get the chance to speak for once.
1166
01:08:56,480 --> 01:08:57,800
Vatican cameos.
1167
01:08:57,800 --> 01:08:59,720
What did he say?
What does that mean?
1168
01:08:59,720 --> 01:09:01,680
Battle stations,
someone's going to die.
1169
01:09:01,680 --> 01:09:02,960
What?!
1170
01:09:04,040 --> 01:09:06,720
Narrow it down. Narrow it down.
1171
01:09:08,000 --> 01:09:09,800
Narrow it down!
1172
01:09:09,800 --> 01:09:11,560
Argh! No, no!
1173
01:09:11,560 --> 01:09:14,000
Not you!
1174
01:09:15,400 --> 01:09:18,600
You. It's always you.
1175
01:09:18,600 --> 01:09:21,360
John Watson, you keep me right.
1176
01:09:23,000 --> 01:09:24,280
What do I do?
1177
01:09:24,280 --> 01:09:25,920
You've already done it.
1178
01:09:25,920 --> 01:09:28,040
Don't solve the murder.
1179
01:09:28,040 --> 01:09:29,240
Save the life.
1180
01:09:29,240 --> 01:09:31,720
Sorry, off piste a bit.
1181
01:09:31,720 --> 01:09:33,040
Back now. Phew!
1182
01:09:33,040 --> 01:09:35,960
Let's play a game.
Let's play murder.
1183
01:09:37,360 --> 01:09:38,480
Sherlock!
1184
01:09:38,480 --> 01:09:41,360
Imagine someone's going to
get murdered at a wedding.
1185
01:09:41,360 --> 01:09:42,720
Who exactly would you pick?
1186
01:09:42,720 --> 01:09:45,720
I think you're a popular choice
at the moment, dear.
1187
01:09:45,720 --> 01:09:48,720
If someone could move Mrs Hudson's
glass just slightly out of reach,
1188
01:09:48,720 --> 01:09:49,720
that would be lovely.
1189
01:09:49,720 --> 01:09:54,000
More importantly, who could you
only kill at a wedding?
1190
01:09:55,360 --> 01:09:57,080
Most people you can kill
any old place.
1191
01:09:57,080 --> 01:09:58,160
As a mental exercise,
1192
01:09:58,160 --> 01:10:00,560
I've often planned the murder
of friends and colleagues.
1193
01:10:00,560 --> 01:10:01,680
Now, John, I'd poison.
1194
01:10:01,680 --> 01:10:04,760
Sloppy eater, dead easy. I've given
him chemicals and compounds,
1195
01:10:04,760 --> 01:10:06,240
that way he's never even noticed.
1196
01:10:06,240 --> 01:10:08,480
He missed a whole Wednesday once,
didn't have a clue.
1197
01:10:08,480 --> 01:10:12,040
Lestrade's so easy to kill it's a miracle
no-one's succumbed to the temptation.
1198
01:10:12,040 --> 01:10:15,920
I've got keys to my brother's house, I could
break in and asphyxiate him, if the whim arose.
1199
01:10:15,920 --> 01:10:17,720
He's pissed, isn't he? Ow!
1200
01:10:17,720 --> 01:10:19,280
So, once again,
1201
01:10:19,280 --> 01:10:21,840
who could you only kill here?
1202
01:10:21,840 --> 01:10:23,400
Clearly it's a rare opportunity,
1203
01:10:23,400 --> 01:10:25,360
so it's someone
who doesn't get out much.
1204
01:10:25,360 --> 01:10:27,280
Someone for whom
a planned social encounter
1205
01:10:27,280 --> 01:10:29,520
known about months in advance
is an exception.
1206
01:10:29,520 --> 01:10:31,160
Has to be a unique opportunity.
1207
01:10:32,560 --> 01:10:34,840
And since killing someone
in public is difficult,
1208
01:10:34,840 --> 01:10:37,000
killing them in private
isn't an option.
1209
01:10:37,000 --> 01:10:40,400
Someone who lives in an inaccessible
or unknown location, then.
1210
01:10:40,400 --> 01:10:42,120
Someone private perhaps,
1211
01:10:42,120 --> 01:10:44,160
obsessed with personal security.
1212
01:10:45,600 --> 01:10:47,480
Possibly someone under threat.
1213
01:10:52,120 --> 01:10:54,640
Major James Sholto, who he?
I don't think he's coming.
1214
01:10:54,640 --> 01:10:55,640
He'll be there.
1215
01:10:55,640 --> 01:10:57,520
Where are you living these days?
1216
01:10:57,520 --> 01:10:59,600
Oh, way out in
the middle of nowhere.
1217
01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:01,200
The press and families
gave him hell.
1218
01:11:01,200 --> 01:11:03,040
He gets more death threats than you.
1219
01:11:04,440 --> 01:11:06,480
A recluse?
1220
01:11:06,480 --> 01:11:08,520
Small household staff.
1221
01:11:08,520 --> 01:11:10,600
Job? Gardener. Cook.
Private nurse. Maid.
1222
01:11:10,600 --> 01:11:12,600
High turnover
for additional security.
1223
01:11:12,600 --> 01:11:15,640
I do security work. Probably all
signed confidentiality agreements.
1224
01:11:15,640 --> 01:11:18,080
Do you have a secret you've
never told anyone? ALL: No.
1225
01:11:18,080 --> 01:11:20,680
There is another question that
remains. Rather a big one,
1226
01:11:20,680 --> 01:11:23,360
a huge one - how would you do it?
How do you kill someone in public?
1227
01:11:23,360 --> 01:11:25,160
There has to be a way.
This has been planned.
1228
01:11:25,160 --> 01:11:27,200
Mr Holmes! Hello, Archie,
what's your theory?
1229
01:11:27,200 --> 01:11:29,640
Get this right and there's
a headless nun in it for you.
1230
01:11:29,640 --> 01:11:32,360
The invisible man could do it.
The who, what, why, when, where?
1231
01:11:32,360 --> 01:11:36,800
The invisible man with the invisible knife.
The one who tried to kill the Guardsman.
1232
01:11:52,840 --> 01:11:54,000
Bainbridge?
1233
01:11:54,000 --> 01:11:55,720
Bainbridge!
1234
01:12:03,240 --> 01:12:06,760
(Oh, not just planned -
planned and rehearsed.)
1235
01:12:06,760 --> 01:12:08,880
Ladies and gentlemen,
1236
01:12:08,880 --> 01:12:10,520
there will now be a short interlude.
1237
01:12:10,520 --> 01:12:12,600
The bride and groom...
1238
01:12:15,320 --> 01:12:17,280
The bride and groom.
1239
01:12:17,280 --> 01:12:21,040
Major Sholto's going to be murdered, I don't
know how or by whom, but it's going to happen.
1240
01:12:21,040 --> 01:12:23,600
Excuse me, coming through.
Consulting.
1241
01:12:23,600 --> 01:12:28,120
Stay here. Please be careful.
Excuse me. Coming through.
1242
01:12:28,120 --> 01:12:30,600
Excuse me.
1243
01:12:30,600 --> 01:12:32,800
I'm sorry, one more.
Oops. I'm so sorry.
1244
01:12:32,800 --> 01:12:33,800
Thank you.
1245
01:12:59,280 --> 01:13:02,320
How can you not remember which room?
You remember everything.
1246
01:13:02,320 --> 01:13:04,720
I have to delete something! 207.
1247
01:13:11,760 --> 01:13:14,680
Major Sholto? Major Sholto!
1248
01:13:16,480 --> 01:13:20,080
Major Sholto! If someone's about
to make an attempt on my life,
1249
01:13:20,080 --> 01:13:22,520
it won't be the first time.
I'm ready.
1250
01:13:22,520 --> 01:13:24,520
Major, let us in.
Kick the door down.
1251
01:13:24,520 --> 01:13:25,720
I really wouldn't.
1252
01:13:25,720 --> 01:13:30,280
I have a gun in my hand and
a lifetime of unfortunate reflexes.
1253
01:13:30,280 --> 01:13:33,640
You're not safe in there. Whoever's after
you, we know a locked room doesn't stop him.
1254
01:13:33,640 --> 01:13:35,600
The invisible man
with the invisible knife.
1255
01:13:35,600 --> 01:13:39,440
I don't know how he does it. I can't stop him and
that means he'll do it again! Solve it, then!
1256
01:13:39,440 --> 01:13:41,280
I'm sorry?
1257
01:13:41,280 --> 01:13:44,400
You're the famous Mr Holmes,
solve the case, on you go.
1258
01:13:44,400 --> 01:13:47,040
Tell me how he did it
and I'll open the door.
1259
01:13:47,040 --> 01:13:49,320
Please, this is no time for games,
1260
01:13:49,320 --> 01:13:50,800
just let us in, you're in danger!
1261
01:13:50,800 --> 01:13:52,360
So are you,
so long as you're here.
1262
01:13:52,360 --> 01:13:55,280
Please, leave me.
1263
01:13:55,280 --> 01:13:58,800
Despite my reputation, I really
don't approve of collateral damage.
1264
01:13:58,800 --> 01:14:02,000
Solve it. Sorry? Solve it and
he'll open the door, like he said.
1265
01:14:02,000 --> 01:14:05,240
I couldn't solve it before, how can I solve it now?
Because it matters now.
1266
01:14:05,240 --> 01:14:08,280
What are you talking about? Get your
wife under control! She's right.
1267
01:14:08,280 --> 01:14:10,160
Oh, you've changed!
No, she is. Shut up!
1268
01:14:10,160 --> 01:14:12,440
You are not a puzzle-solver,
you never have been.
1269
01:14:12,440 --> 01:14:13,560
You're a drama queen!
1270
01:14:13,560 --> 01:14:17,320
Now, there's a man in there about
to die, the game is on - solve it!
1271
01:14:33,080 --> 01:14:34,160
Bainbridge?
1272
01:14:36,880 --> 01:14:38,360
Bainbridge!
1273
01:14:41,480 --> 01:14:43,840
Though in fairness,
he's a drama queen too. I know.
1274
01:14:43,840 --> 01:14:45,920
Major Sholto, no-one's
coming to kill you.
1275
01:14:45,920 --> 01:14:48,720
I'm afraid you've already
been killed several hours ago.
1276
01:14:48,720 --> 01:14:49,880
What did you say?
1277
01:14:49,880 --> 01:14:51,440
Don't take off your belt.
1278
01:14:51,440 --> 01:14:52,960
My belt?
1279
01:14:52,960 --> 01:14:54,080
His belt, yes.
1280
01:14:54,080 --> 01:14:56,480
Bainbridge was stabbed
hours before we even saw him,
1281
01:14:56,480 --> 01:14:58,040
but it was through his belt.
1282
01:14:58,040 --> 01:14:59,880
Tight belt, worn high on the waist.
1283
01:14:59,880 --> 01:15:01,880
Very easy to push a small blade
through the fabric
1284
01:15:01,880 --> 01:15:03,120
and you wouldn't even feel it.
1285
01:15:03,120 --> 01:15:06,000
The belt would bind the flesh
together when it was tied tight.
1286
01:15:06,000 --> 01:15:08,600
Exactly. But when you took it off...
Delayed-action stabbing.
1287
01:15:08,600 --> 01:15:11,480
All the time in the world
to create an alibi. Major Sholto?
1288
01:15:11,480 --> 01:15:12,760
So...
1289
01:15:15,560 --> 01:15:18,840
I was to be killed by my uniform.
1290
01:15:18,840 --> 01:15:21,160
How appropriate.
1291
01:15:23,240 --> 01:15:24,720
He solved the case, Major,
1292
01:15:24,720 --> 01:15:27,720
you're supposed to open
the door now. A deal is a deal.
1293
01:15:27,720 --> 01:15:29,760
I'm not even supposed to
have this any more,
1294
01:15:29,760 --> 01:15:31,880
they gave me special
dispensation to keep it.
1295
01:15:31,880 --> 01:15:34,200
I couldn't imagine life
out of this uniform.
1296
01:15:34,200 --> 01:15:37,240
I suppose, given the circumstances,
I don't have to.
1297
01:15:40,240 --> 01:15:41,600
When so many want you dead,
1298
01:15:41,600 --> 01:15:43,560
it hardly seems
good manners to argue.
1299
01:15:48,200 --> 01:15:52,000
Whatever you're doing in there,
James, stop it, right now!
1300
01:15:52,000 --> 01:15:53,720
I will kick this door down!
1301
01:15:53,720 --> 01:15:56,640
Mr Holmes, you and
I are similar, I think.
1302
01:15:56,640 --> 01:15:59,440
Yes, I think we are. There's
a proper time to die, isn't there?
1303
01:15:59,440 --> 01:16:00,760
Of course there is.
1304
01:16:00,760 --> 01:16:04,480
And one should embrace it
when it comes.
1305
01:16:04,480 --> 01:16:05,520
Like a soldier.
1306
01:16:05,520 --> 01:16:08,320
Of course one should,
but not at John's wedding!
1307
01:16:10,480 --> 01:16:12,200
We wouldn't do that, would we,
1308
01:16:12,200 --> 01:16:14,520
you and me?
1309
01:16:14,520 --> 01:16:17,280
We would never do that
to John Watson.
1310
01:16:22,400 --> 01:16:23,760
I'm going to break it down.
1311
01:16:23,760 --> 01:16:25,800
Wait, wait, wait, you won't have to.
1312
01:16:32,080 --> 01:16:34,720
I believe I am in need
of medical attention.
1313
01:16:34,720 --> 01:16:37,520
I believe I'm your doctor.
1314
01:16:53,120 --> 01:16:55,360
Pretty good.
1315
01:16:55,360 --> 01:16:57,440
Just hold your nerve
on your turning.
1316
01:16:57,440 --> 01:16:59,120
Why do we have to rehearse?
1317
01:16:59,120 --> 01:17:01,360
Because we are about to
dance together in public
1318
01:17:01,360 --> 01:17:02,880
and your skills are appalling.
1319
01:17:04,480 --> 01:17:06,480
Wow, you're a good teacher. Hmm.
1320
01:17:06,480 --> 01:17:08,320
And you're a brilliant dancer.
1321
01:17:08,320 --> 01:17:10,200
Can I let you in
on something, Janine?
1322
01:17:10,200 --> 01:17:11,680
Go on, then.
1323
01:17:11,680 --> 01:17:13,760
I love dancing,
I've always loved it.
1324
01:17:13,760 --> 01:17:14,840
Seriously?
1325
01:17:14,840 --> 01:17:15,800
Watch out.
1326
01:17:19,840 --> 01:17:22,360
Oh!
1327
01:17:22,360 --> 01:17:24,720
Never really comes up
in crime work, but, you know,
1328
01:17:24,720 --> 01:17:27,600
I live in hope of the right case.
Oh, I wish you weren't...
1329
01:17:27,600 --> 01:17:30,760
whatever it is you are.
1330
01:17:30,760 --> 01:17:33,600
I know. Well, glad to see
you've pulled, Sherlock,
1331
01:17:33,600 --> 01:17:36,440
what with murderers
running riot at my wedding.
1332
01:17:36,440 --> 01:17:38,120
One murderer... One nearly murderer.
1333
01:17:38,120 --> 01:17:40,520
Loves to exaggerate -
you should try living with him.
1334
01:17:40,520 --> 01:17:42,040
Sherlock.
1335
01:17:42,040 --> 01:17:43,800
Got him for you.
1336
01:17:43,800 --> 01:17:46,920
Ah, the photographer,
excellent. Thank you.
1337
01:17:46,920 --> 01:17:49,280
May I have a look at your camera?
1338
01:17:49,280 --> 01:17:52,280
Erm, what's this about?
I was halfway home.
1339
01:17:52,280 --> 01:17:54,360
You should have driven faster.
1340
01:17:55,560 --> 01:17:57,120
Ah, yes. Yes!
1341
01:17:57,120 --> 01:17:58,880
Very good.
1342
01:17:58,880 --> 01:18:01,480
Now you see... Perfect.
1343
01:18:01,480 --> 01:18:03,880
What is? Are you going to tell us?
1344
01:18:03,880 --> 01:18:05,440
Try looking yourself.
1345
01:18:07,120 --> 01:18:10,400
Look for what?
Is the murderer in these photographs?
1346
01:18:10,400 --> 01:18:12,200
It's not what's
in the photographs,
1347
01:18:12,200 --> 01:18:14,280
it's what's not in them.
Not in any of them.
1348
01:18:14,280 --> 01:18:15,560
Sherlock?
1349
01:18:15,560 --> 01:18:17,920
The showing-off thing,
we've discussed it before...
1350
01:18:19,600 --> 01:18:23,160
There is always a man at a wedding
who is not in any photograph,
1351
01:18:23,160 --> 01:18:24,960
who can go anywhere.
1352
01:18:24,960 --> 01:18:27,760
And even carry an equipment bag
around with him if he likes.
1353
01:18:27,760 --> 01:18:29,720
And you never even see his face.
1354
01:18:29,720 --> 01:18:31,320
You only ever see...
1355
01:18:40,120 --> 01:18:41,400
The camera.
1356
01:18:41,400 --> 01:18:42,920
What are you doing? What is this?
1357
01:18:42,920 --> 01:18:45,560
Jonathan Small, today's
substitute wedding photographer,
1358
01:18:45,560 --> 01:18:47,440
known to us as the Mayfly Man.
1359
01:18:47,440 --> 01:18:52,160
His brother was one of the raw
recruits killed in that incursion.
1360
01:18:52,160 --> 01:18:54,240
Johnny sought revenge on Sholto,
1361
01:18:54,240 --> 01:18:56,560
worked his way through
Sholto's staff,
1362
01:18:56,560 --> 01:18:57,760
found what he needed.
1363
01:18:57,760 --> 01:18:59,960
An invitation to a wedding.
1364
01:18:59,960 --> 01:19:03,480
The one time Sholto would
have to be out in public.
1365
01:19:03,480 --> 01:19:07,280
So he made his plan
and rehearsed the murder,
1366
01:19:07,280 --> 01:19:10,800
making sure of every last detail.
1367
01:19:23,000 --> 01:19:24,560
Brilliant, ruthless,
1368
01:19:24,560 --> 01:19:26,480
and almost certainly a monomaniac.
1369
01:19:26,480 --> 01:19:29,480
Though, in fairness, his photographs
are actually quite good.
1370
01:19:29,480 --> 01:19:31,080
Everything you need is on that.
1371
01:19:31,080 --> 01:19:34,120
You probably ought to
arrest him or something.
1372
01:19:34,120 --> 01:19:36,240
Do you always carry handcuffs?
1373
01:19:36,240 --> 01:19:38,280
Down, girl. Come on, quick.
1374
01:19:38,280 --> 01:19:40,760
It's not me you should
be arresting, Mr Holmes.
1375
01:19:40,760 --> 01:19:43,320
Oh, I don't do the arresting,
I just farm that out.
1376
01:19:43,320 --> 01:19:45,520
Sholto, he's the killer, not me.
1377
01:19:45,520 --> 01:19:47,760
I should have killed him quicker.
1378
01:19:50,360 --> 01:19:52,280
I shouldn't have tried to be clever.
1379
01:19:53,640 --> 01:19:55,440
You should have driven faster.
1380
01:20:04,760 --> 01:20:06,080
Right.
1381
01:21:24,680 --> 01:21:26,680
Ladies and gentlemen,
just one last thing
1382
01:21:26,680 --> 01:21:28,720
before the evening begins properly.
1383
01:21:28,720 --> 01:21:32,480
Apologies for earlier,
a crisis arose and was dealt with.
1384
01:21:32,480 --> 01:21:34,480
More importantly, however,
1385
01:21:34,480 --> 01:21:36,360
today we saw two people make vows.
1386
01:21:36,360 --> 01:21:37,800
I've never made a vow in my life
1387
01:21:37,800 --> 01:21:39,560
and after tonight
I never will again.
1388
01:21:39,560 --> 01:21:41,760
So, here in front of you all,
1389
01:21:41,760 --> 01:21:43,480
my first and last vow.
1390
01:21:44,680 --> 01:21:46,680
Mary and John,
1391
01:21:46,680 --> 01:21:48,480
whatever it takes,
1392
01:21:48,480 --> 01:21:50,480
whatever happens,
1393
01:21:50,480 --> 01:21:51,840
from now on,
1394
01:21:51,840 --> 01:21:54,360
I swear I will always be there.
1395
01:21:54,360 --> 01:21:55,720
Always.
1396
01:21:55,720 --> 01:21:57,120
For all three of you.
1397
01:21:57,120 --> 01:21:59,600
Erm... Sorry, I mean...
I mean two of you.
1398
01:21:59,600 --> 01:22:02,120
All two of you. Both of you,
in fact. I just miscounted.
1399
01:22:02,120 --> 01:22:04,000
Anyway, it's time for dancing.
1400
01:22:04,000 --> 01:22:05,840
Play the music again,
please. Thank you.
1401
01:22:05,840 --> 01:22:07,880
OK, everybody, just dance,
don't be shy.
1402
01:22:07,880 --> 01:22:09,960
Dancing, please. Very good.
1403
01:22:09,960 --> 01:22:12,720
Sorry, that was one more deduction
than I was really expecting.
1404
01:22:12,720 --> 01:22:14,440
Deduction? Increased appetite...
1405
01:22:14,440 --> 01:22:16,400
I'm starving.
Change of taste perception.
1406
01:22:16,400 --> 01:22:18,560
Oh, I chose this wine,
but it's bloody awful!
1407
01:22:18,560 --> 01:22:19,840
You were sick this morning.
1408
01:22:19,840 --> 01:22:21,520
You assumed it was
just wedding nerves.
1409
01:22:21,520 --> 01:22:23,680
You got angry with me
when I mentioned it to you.
1410
01:22:23,680 --> 01:22:26,880
All the signs are there. The signs?
1411
01:22:26,880 --> 01:22:28,840
The signs of three.
1412
01:22:28,840 --> 01:22:30,720
What?
1413
01:22:30,720 --> 01:22:32,640
Mary, I think you should
do a pregnancy test.
1414
01:22:33,720 --> 01:22:36,840
Well, the statistics for
the first trimester are...
1415
01:22:36,840 --> 01:22:37,880
Shut up!
1416
01:22:39,360 --> 01:22:40,640
Just shut up.
1417
01:22:40,640 --> 01:22:41,840
Sorry.
1418
01:22:41,840 --> 01:22:44,000
How did he notice before me?
1419
01:22:44,000 --> 01:22:46,480
I'm a bloody doctor. It's your
day off. It's YOUR day off!
1420
01:22:46,480 --> 01:22:47,600
Stop. Stop panicking.
1421
01:22:47,600 --> 01:22:50,400
I'm not panicking. I'm pregnant,
I'm panicking! Don't panic.
1422
01:22:50,400 --> 01:22:52,040
None of you panic.
1423
01:22:52,040 --> 01:22:53,800
Absolutely no reason to panic.
1424
01:22:53,800 --> 01:22:57,760
Oh, and you'd know, of course! Yes, I would.
You're already the best parents in the world,
1425
01:22:57,760 --> 01:23:00,280
look at all the practice
you've had. What practice?
1426
01:23:00,280 --> 01:23:04,200
Well, you're hardly going to need me around
now that you've got a real baby on the way.
1427
01:23:11,840 --> 01:23:13,880
Are you all right? Yeah!
1428
01:23:20,600 --> 01:23:23,760
Dance. Hmm?
Both of you now, go, dance.
1429
01:23:23,760 --> 01:23:27,040
We can't just stand here, people will
wonder what we're talking about. Right.
1430
01:23:27,040 --> 01:23:28,280
Well, what about you?
1431
01:23:28,280 --> 01:23:31,720
Yeah, we can't all three dance, there
are limits. Yes, there are. Ahem.
1432
01:23:31,720 --> 01:23:33,600
Come on, husband, let's go.
1433
01:23:33,600 --> 01:23:35,640
This isn't a waltz, is it? No.
1434
01:23:35,640 --> 01:23:37,360
Don't worry,
I have been tutoring him.
1435
01:23:37,360 --> 01:23:41,040
He did, you know. Baker Street, behind closed curtains.
Mrs Hudson came in one time.
1436
01:23:41,040 --> 01:23:43,200
I don't know how those
rumours started!
1437
01:23:47,440 --> 01:23:49,400
♪ Spinnin' my head around
and taking my body under
1438
01:23:51,480 --> 01:23:53,520
♪ Oh, what a night!
1439
01:23:55,800 --> 01:23:59,600
♪ Oh, what a night!
1440
01:24:09,200 --> 01:24:12,640
♪ Oh, I
1441
01:24:12,640 --> 01:24:16,400
♪ I got a funny feelin'
when she walked
1442
01:24:16,400 --> 01:24:18,440
♪ In the room
1443
01:24:18,440 --> 01:24:20,840
♪ Hey, I
1444
01:24:20,840 --> 01:24:25,560
♪ As I recall it ended much too soon
1445
01:24:28,080 --> 01:24:30,880
♪ Oh, what a night
1446
01:24:30,880 --> 01:24:34,640
♪ Why'd it take so long
to see the light?
1447
01:24:34,640 --> 01:24:39,600
♪ Seemed so wrong
but now it seems so right
1448
01:24:39,600 --> 01:24:43,680
♪ What a lady, what a night
1449
01:24:55,360 --> 01:25:01,120
♪ Oh, I felt a rush like
a rolling ball of thunder
1450
01:25:01,120 --> 01:25:04,800
♪ Spinnin' my head around
and taking my body under
1451
01:25:04,800 --> 01:25:07,760
♪ Oh, what a night!
1452
01:25:09,280 --> 01:25:12,800
♪ Oh, what a night!
1453
01:25:14,320 --> 01:25:15,680
♪ Oh, what a night... ♪
109571
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