Original subtitles

《女子监狱》 第一季第九集

你怎么没去干活 Why aren't you at work?

卢斯奇克没出现 Uh, Luschek never showed.

也许吐了一地 然后昏倒了 Probably passed out in his own vomit somewhere.

所以你决定来这里帮忙 So, you chose to come in here and help?

是啊 感恩节这么忙 我觉得你需要人手 Yeah. Figured you could use it for Thanksgiving.

那就赶紧从桌子上下来 Then get your ass off my counter

帮吉娜把火鸡从冰箱里拿出来 and help Gina pull the turkeys out of the freezer.

我们今年能吃上火鸡啊 Shit. We got real turkey this year?

是从厂里收来的下脚料 五十美分一磅 We got trimmings from the factory, fifty cents a pound.

下脚料 别人都不要的 Trimmings. Shit no one else wants.

这就是一袋火鸡屁股 That's a bag of turkey assholes right there.

晚餐的标配是五个囚犯一美元 The whole meal has to come in at a dollar five a prisoner.

纳税人才不管是不是过节 Taxpayers don't give a shit if it's a holiday.

我们是坏人 We're the bad guys.

王八蛋 Pig fucker!

炒炒洋葱做肉汁 Brown the onions for the gravy.

太烫了吗 That too hot, baby?

不烫 正好 感觉真好 No. That's perfect. It feels so good.

在你醒着时 频繁眨眼 "Frequent blinking may actually be a way

能让你的大脑休息 醒着的休息 for your brain to rest while you're awake." Wakeful rest.

你还好吗 亲爱的 You okay, honey?

只是不习惯被别人碰 It's just being touched by another person.

-我懂 -谢谢 索菲娅 - I get it. - Thanks, Sophia.

人在这里会变得孤独 A body gets lonely in here.

我不是说做爱 我怀念与人接触 Yeah. It's not even sex, you know? I just... I miss contact.

人类不该这样生活 Human beings aren't supposed to live like this.

我进来了差不多两年了 I've been in almost two years,

有的晚上我还是会伸手够我老婆 and there are still nights I reach out for my wife.

我在想你们这类人 You know, I was thinking about you guys,

我在设想我会怎么做 and I was imagining what I would do

如果莱瑞告诉我他想做个女人 if Larry told me that he wanted to be a woman.

我觉得我应该会接受 I'd like to think that I would be open to it,

但那太诡异了 but it would just be so weird.

不好意思 这样太粗鲁了吗 I'm sorry. Is that totally rude?

没关系 No. It's fine.

要是变成女人 他一定很丑 He would make such an ugly girl.

他今天来看你吗 Is he coming to visit you today?

在监狱度过的第一个假日会很难过 First holiday in prison can be rough.

很情绪化 Very emotional.

她会没事的 She's gonna be fine,

我要把她打造成超模海蒂·克拉姆 'cause we about to make some Heidi Klum shit happen right here.

有空的狱警请来管理大楼 Any available C.O.s to the admin building.

可不好闻啊 That smells nasty.

里面有什么 What's it made of?

你不会想知道的 You don't want to know.

你怎么学会做这个的 How did you learn all this?

我舅妈是个祭司 My aunt was a Santera.

我以前会帮她 I used to help her out sometimes.

就学会了 I dabble.

我会怎么样 So, what's gonna happen to me?

你会抽筋 拉肚子 You're gonna cramp up, some wicked diarrhea.

这可不好受 This shit ain't pretty.

喝下这个 你就得出去在院子里挖个洞 You drink this, and you're gonna go out and dig a hole in the yard.

你要让我在洞里拉屎吗 You're gonna make me shit in a hole?

不 你要把这颗豆子放进去 No. You're gonna put this bean in there.

然后你会找到一支香烟 Then you're gonna find a cigarette.

往里面吹一些烟 You're gonna blow some smoke in there.

然后用一堆泥土覆盖小洞 You're gonna cover it up with a mound of dirt.

必须这样做 And that's gonna have to do it,

因为我这里没有当归 because I don't have any angelica

或者辟邪油 or gris-gris oil.

喝吧 Take it.

这样会流产吗 This is gonna kill it?

你想流产 对吧 Well, that's what you want, right?

只要我不会痛 As long as it don't feel anything.

拜托 胎儿都还没成形呢 Oh, please. It don't even have a brain yet.

上帝原谅我 赶紧喝了 Ay, que dios me perdone. Hurry up. Drink it.

好烫 Ow! That's hot!

告诉过你很烫了 笨蛋 快喝完 I told you it was, stupid. Go ahead. Drink it all.

我的巧克力呢 Where my Snickers?

227号囚犯 有人探访你 Prisoner two two seven, you have a visitor.

我为死去的婴儿们祈祷 You know, I pray for all the dead babies

还有他们的灵魂 and all their baby souls.

D区宿舍 准备放风 Dorm section D, prepare for yard time.

上帝一定会让他们上天堂 And God, he's gonna let them into heaven,

就算他们没有受过洗礼 even though they weren't baptized.

-你都写下了吗 -记下了 - Are you getting all this? - Yep.

你还可以告诉朱迪 我也为她祈祷 You can also tell Judy that, that I pray for her, as well.

她叫芭芭拉 Well, her name's Barbara.

芭芭拉 Barbara?

芭芭拉 Barbara.

天啊 这么多粉丝来信 我都搞不清了 Damn! I can't keep all this fan mail straight!

我跟不上了 I-I-I can't keep up with it.

怎么 你还有粉丝 Wait, you have fans?

她是个英雄 保护未出生的婴儿 She's a hero. She's a defender of the unborn.

天啊 那听起来像一部很烂的《X战警》 Geez. That sounds like a bad X-Men movie.

你们怎么做 炸掉堕胎诊所吗 What'd you do, bomb an abortion clinic?

最后写上 You know, we can, uh, sign off with, um,

我会在2015年前出狱 I will be out of here by two-thousand-fifteen,

在世界末日之前 before the rapture.

-天啊 -有什么好笑的吗 - Oh, man. - Is something fucking funny to you?!

人们一直在预测世界末日 Yeah. It's just people predict the rapture all the time.

那不是应该在2011年发生的吗 I mean, wasn't that supposed to happen in two-thousand-eleven?

不 那分为两个阶段 No, i-i-it comes in two stages,

如果你认真学习过的话 if you study your shit.

第一阶段是精神方面的末日 The first one was a spiritual rapture,

第二阶段才是有形的末日 and the second one coming is a physical one.

-我懂了 -好吗 - Ah. I see. - Okay?

明白了 Got it.

你没有被邀请 And you're not invited,

因为末日客车不许拉拉上 because they don't allow gay people on their rapture bus!

还有辆客车吗 There's a bus?

座位都被阿巴拉契亚的毒枭占了吗 Are all the seats already taken by Appalachian meth heads?

你非得顶嘴 沃斯 对吧 Aw, man, you're gonna, you're just gonna get it, Vause, aren't you?

又要回到烘干机事件了吗 Do we have to go back to the dryer, huh?

你已经把我关进过烘干机了 You already locked me in that fucking dryer.

也许这次我他妈会启动烘干机 Yeah, maybe I'll fucking turn it on this time,

让你像一只沙鼠一样打转 make you spin around like a gerbil.

想知道原因吗 Want to know why?

因为我受够了你这样的有钱婊 'Cause I've had it with rich bitches like you.

这是山寨货 Those are bobos.

阿迪达斯正品是三道杠 不是四道 Real Adidas have three stripes, not four.

你的鞋是山寨货 Your shoes are bobos.

所以呢 So?

所以你妈妈在地摊上购物 在小餐馆打工 So your mom shops at Payless... and works at Friendly's.

我妈妈有四份工作 My Mom has, like, four jobs.

那又不是什么值得炫耀的事 That's not something to brag about.

你穿得像流浪汉似的 You dress like a bum.

闻起来也像 She smells like one, too.

你们住在那辆破车里吗 Do you guys live in that janky car?

拜拜 邋遢鬼 Bye-bye, pigsty.

他们是你的朋友吗 Those your friends?

不是 No.

在学校过得怎么样 How was school?

他们重排了工作表 They changed the schedule around

我以后不用上晚班了 so I don't got to work nights no more.

该死的布兰达一直想让我给她代班 That fucking Brenda keeps trying to get me to cover her shifts.

你在干什么 外面冷死了 What are you doing? It's freezing out.

你他妈干什么呢 What the fuck was that?!

我不穿这双鞋了 是山寨货 I'm not wearing those anymore. They're bobos.

捡回来 Go get 'em back.

洁西卡·韦治说鞋子很破 Jessica Wedge says they're lame.

让洁西卡·韦治去死吧 So fuck Jessica Wedge.

她们都笑话我 说我是邋遢鬼 They all make fun of me. They call me pigsty.

你告诉她们你爸爸是谁了吗 Did you tell them who your Dad is?

我都没见过他 I've never even met him.

你告诉他们 Well, you tell them.

你告诉他们 "我爸爸是李·伯利 You tell them, "My Dad is Lee Burley,

死亡少女的鼓手" the drummer for Death Maiden."

等着看那些自以为是的小贱货们怎么说吧 You see what those smug little bitches say then.

她们算毛啊 I mean, who are they, huh?

怎么 就凭她们爸妈在大学工作 What, 'cause their parents work at the college,

她们就觉得自己了不起了吗 they think they're all fuckin' fancy?

你可是摇滚之神的女儿 You are the daughter of a rock God.

如果他名利双收 我们为什么这么穷苦不堪 If he's so rich and famous, why are we so broke?

你知道有多少女孩在他的音乐会上尖叫 You know how many girls used to scream at his concerts, you know,

脱掉衣服 对他投怀送抱吗 rip their clothes off, throw themselves at him?

但你爸爸选择了我 我们一起生下了你 But your Dad chose me, and together we made you.

赶紧去把你的球鞋捡回来 Now go get your fuckin' sneakers.

别听那些自作聪明的混蛋的 Don't you listen to those...smarty-pants assholes.

她们会过上无聊到死的生活 They're gonna have boring-ass lives.

她们会对你羡慕嫉妒恨的 They're gonna wish that they were you.

你很酷 You are cool.

听着 蠢货们 Listen up, turd bags.

自杀 听着 蠢货们 Listen up, turd bags.

自杀

我们允许你们举办欢送派对 We're gonna let you have your little going-away party, 自杀

我们允许你们举办欢送派对 We're gonna let you have your little going-away party,

美味姐 我们会想你的 我们允许你们举办欢送派对 We're gonna let you have your little going-away party,

美味姐 我们会想你的 但之后别用床单 卫生棉条的线 but do not make our lives more difficult afterwards

美味姐 我们会想你的 或者别的玩意儿吊死 by hanging yourself with a sheet or a tampon string

或者别的玩意儿吊死 by hanging yourself with a sheet or a tampon string

让我们的日子不好过 or whatever the fuck you like to get all arts and craftsy with.

感恩节不许自杀 No Thanksgiving suicides.

查普曼 在感恩之日 我们不能做什么 Chapman, what are we not to do on this day of thanks?

自杀 Commit suicide?

正是 我们是清教徒 Exactly. We are the pilgrims.

而你们是印第安人 You bitches are the Indians.

在这次节日我们携手合作 This is the holiday where we cooperate.

对啊 我们给你们送去了玉米 Oh, yes. We bring you maize,

你们送给我们被天花病污染过的毛毯 and you give us smallpox blankets.

正是 双赢啊 Exactly. Everybody wins.

你看起来像琼贝妮特·拉姆齐[选美小皇后] You look like JonBenét Ramsey.

我就想要这种效果 Well, that's what I was going for.

-能帮我拿一下吗 -好 - Can you hold this for me? - Yeah.

这是你做的吗 Did you make this?

是啊 这是第二次做的 Mm-hmm. It's my second attempt.

我们会想你的 美味姐 是啊 这是第二次做的 Mm-hmm. It's my second attempt.

我们会想你的 美味姐 第一次我拼错了 I spelled it wrong the first time.

美味节

她们还说你上过大学呢 And they say you went to college.

天啊 我真讨厌看到有人出狱 God, I hate seeing people go.

会提醒我自己还要服刑多久 It reminds me of how much time I have left.

是啊 但想想你还会经历多少好玩的事吧 Yeah. But think of the story that you'll have.

这是我的台词 That is my line.

我知道 你总是在不如意的时候说这句话 I know it is. You always trot it out in times of suckiness.

是啊 Yup.

就像我在爪哇岛得的肠胃炎 Like that stomach virus I had in Java.

那真是个不错的故事 Well, it was a great fucking story.

整个村庄里的人都跑出来看你拉屎 The whole village came out to watch you poop.

也许这也像那次一样 So maybe this is kind of like that.

她要来了 美味姐 Yo, yo! She coming, yo. Taystee!

美味姐 美味姐 美味姐 美味姐 Taystee! Taystee! Taystee! Taystee!

我要出去啦 姐妹们 I'm gettin' out, bitches!

对抗权威 让男人去死 Fight the power! Fuck the man!

注意点 Hey, watch it.

来抱抱 你是我的辣妹 Hey, yo, come here. Mm! You my shawty.

别这样啦 矮个妞会让我们哭的 Aw! Cut it out. Scrubby little hood rats gonna make a bitch cry.

妞儿 Hey, girl!

妞儿 Hey, girl!

天啊 你还记得怎么跳舞吗 Oh, my God. Do you remember this?

记得 Yes.

我都不知道手臂该怎么动 I-I don't even know how the arms go.

我觉得...对了 I think-- oh right.

瞧瞧 这俩白妞也扭起来啦 Shit, these white girls tryin' to throw down!

扭屁屁 Yeah. Shake that ass!

那可是在搞拉拉 That's lesbian activity.

当然啦 It sure is.

她们在做爱 海利先生 我看到了 They're sexing, Mr. Healy. I seen it.

今天早上在浴室里 This morning, in the bathroom,

一个女孩的脸完全埋在另一个女孩的下面 one girl's face was all up in the other one's hoo-ha.

太恶心了 令人厌恶 It was so nasty! It's an abomination!

好了 够了 Okay. Enough.

她们还在呻吟什么的 They were moaning and everything,

含含糊糊地说话 就像是复兴一样 speaking in tongues like it's some kind of revival.

你说的是谁 Who? Who are you talking about?

沃斯和查普曼 Vause and Chapman.

查普曼 Chapman?

对 查普曼 她是拉拉 Mm-hmm. Chapman. She a lesbian.

她们在一起搞拉拉 They lesbianin' together.

她们现在就在里面 当着大家的面 They're in there right now, in front of everyone,

跳着挑逗的舞蹈 dancing all up on each other.

带我去看 Show me.

查普曼 过来 Chapman, get over here!

派对结束了 Party's over.

-我们只是在... -闭嘴 查普曼 - We were just-- - Shut your mouth, Chapman.

你觉得可以侵犯你的牢友吗 You think it's appropriate to violate your fellow inmate?

侵犯 我们只是在跳... Violate? We were just danc—

我说了闭嘴 I said shut your mouth!

是你问我的 You asked me a question!

就我看来那像企图强奸 That looked like attempted rape to me.

关她禁闭 Take her to SHU.

-什么 -禁闭 - What? - SHU?

你不能这样做 You can't do that.

她说的有道理 Yeah, she's kinda right.

闭嘴 曼多萨 我受够你的废话了 Shut up, Mendez! You know, I'm tired of your shit.

我他妈是你的上级 I'm your superior fucking officer!

要么你带她去关禁闭 Now, you put her in the goddamn box

要么我把你也关进去 or I will fucking write you up, too!

她都没做什么... She didn't even do any—

-后退 -不要 不要 - Step back… - No, no, no, no, no, no, no.

不然我会认定你是袭击警官 …or I will cite you for assaulting an officer.

今天还有人来探视我 I-- I have visitation today!

莱瑞要来看我 你不能这样做 Larry's coming to see me! You can't do this!

好了 That's all right.

-我们赶快照他说的办 -求你别这样 - Let's do what the man says - Please, don't do this to me!

免得他得动脉瘤 走吧 before he has an aneurysm. Come on.

-求你别这样 -走吧 - Please don't do this! - Come on!

给我把猎枪 Gimme a shotgun!

他妈的 给我把猎枪 混蛋 Gimme a motherfucking shotgun, motherfucker!

到了 This is you.

我要在这里待多久 How long am I gonna be in here?

直到我们放你出来 Till we let you out.

就在明天了 So, tomorrow's the day.

我表姐本该给我送来出狱穿的衣服 My cousin was supposed to send me my dress-out pack,

但一直没到 but it never came.

现在我得穿进来时穿的衣服了 Now I got to wear the same shit I came in here with.

衣服会太紧的 Man, it's gonna be too tight.

你可以穿着垃圾袋走出去 Man, you can walk out of here in a garbage bag

还是会一路跳着舞上车的 and you'd still be dancing all the way to the bus.

-红线 八号区 十分钟 -我好害怕 - Redline, cell block eight. Ten minutes. - I'm scared.

外面的世界不会比监狱更可怕的 Nothin' out there gonna be scarier than this shit.

我这辈子都在机构里 Shit, I've been in institutions my whole life.

我十六岁之前都是国家受监护人 I was a ward of the state till I was sixteen,

然后进了少管所 then juvie.

我啥也不会 I got no skills.

你这就是在扯谎了 Well, now you're just lying.

你在法律图书馆干了两年 You've worked in that law library for two years.

比我的公设辩护律师还有学问呢 You know more than my public defender.

但是在外面 律师可是需要学历的 Yeah, but out there, you need real school for that stuff.

没人会把我当回事的 No one's gonna take me serious.

你是个聪明的姑娘 You're a smart girl!

你喜欢扮小丑 You like to play the clown.

但你可以为世界做出很多贡献 But you've got a lot to offer this world.

这不是生活 美味姐 This is not a life, Taystee.

听伏都教女祭司的话 Yo, listen to Voodoo Mambo, yo.

你是不是得了 叫什么来着 Eh, you think you just havin', what they call it,

发生在笼子里的动物身上 that, uh, thing that happens to animals in captivity

能改变它们大脑的病 where it changes they brains?

有次我在布朗克斯动物园看到了 I seen it at the Bronx Zoo once.

一只长颈鹿吃了自己的呕吐物 This, uh, giraffe ate its own vomit,

用头撞栏杆 banged his head up against the bars,

因为它觉得自己适应不了野外生活了 'cause it ain't fit to live in the wild no more.

不知道怎么吃叶子 Don't know how to eat leaves.

我就是这个意思 我就是那只长颈鹿 That's what I'm saying. I'm the giraffe.

你才不是 长颈鹿多瘦啊 看你那大屁股 Fuck, no, you ain't! Giraffe's skinny. Look at that ass.

别被这种思想影响 T Yo, don't let 'em get to you, T.

问题不在这里 This ain't where it's at.

杰德和莱恩带着孩子从芝加哥飞来 Jed and Lane are flying in from Chicago tonight with the kids.

奶奶也会去吗 Oh, will Grammy be there?

奶奶要待在北卡罗来纳州 她交了个男朋友 Grammy's gonna stay in North Carolina. She's got a boyfriend.

别扯淡 No shit!

苏珊娜 Suzanne.

不好意思 不说脏话 Sorry. Language.

我知道自己一团糟 I know I'm a mess.

我在教堂的赈济处掌勺 I've been cooking at the soup kitchen at church.

做甘薯砂锅吗 Sweet-potato casserole?

我是个偏才 I'm a one-trick pony.

瞧 你又回教堂了 See? You're back at church.

我告诉过你 人们会忘记的 I told you, people get over it.

来了个新牧师 Well, um, there's a new pastor.

他很热情 人很好 He's been really welcoming, very nice.

他把我介绍给经理人 He introduced me to a money manager

他给我支了几招 教我怎么和银行打交道 who gave me some free advice on how to talk to the bank,

他对迈克尔也很好 and he's sweet with Michael.

伊瓦顺道来沙龙了 她怀孕了 Um, Eva stopped by the salon. She's pregnant.

她已经努力很长时间了 You know, she's been trying for a long time.

你喜欢这个牧师吗 You... you like him, this pastor?

他是个好人 He's a good man.

我问的不是这个 That's not what I'm asking.

我不打算谈这个 这是感恩节 I'm not, uh, gonna talk about this. It's Thanksgiving.

我想谈这个 Well, I want to talk about it.

你想要我说什么 What do you want me to say?

我碰到了我感兴趣的人 That I met someone and I'm interested,

我很孤独 想念男人 that I'm lonely and I miss men?

你离开的时候 告诉我... When you went away, you told me--

我知道自己说了什么 I know what I said.

亲爱的 我不想让陌生男人 Baby, I don't want some strange man

接近我儿子 我老婆 around my son, my wife.

我们并不能一直如愿以偿 对吧 Look, we don't always get what we want, now, do we?

你的头发怎么了 What about your hair?

妈咪 我碰巧喜欢我头发现在的样子 Mommy! I happen to like my hair like this.

是来探访查普曼的吗 Here to see Chapman?

是 Yep.

你们真是可爱的一对 You two are such a cute couple.

她才可爱 我是她毛茸茸的跟班 She's the cute one. I'm like her furry sidekick.

实际上 你今天不能探访她 Oh, um, actually, you can't see her today.

为什么 Why not?

她的探访权被取消了 She's had some privileges revoked.

她被关禁闭了 She's in the security housing unit.

什么 禁闭 她被关禁闭了 The, the what? Solitary? She, she, she's in solitary?

她做了什么 What did she do?

对不起 我不能告诉你 我不... I'm sorry. I can't tell you that. I don't...

这太荒唐了 Thi-th-this is ridiculous.

我需要和你的经理或者上级谈谈 I-I need to speak with your manager or, uh, your, uh, superior,

只要他妈的是管事的就行 拜托 whoever the fuck is in charge here, please.

请别对我说脏话 我可以给你个电话 Please don't swear at me. I can give you a number to call.

她还好吗 我就不能看看她吗 Is she okay? Can't I just see her for a minute?

看在老天的份上 这可是节日 I mean, it's a holiday, for god's sake.

你能把我的电话号码给 Okay, can y-can you at least give my phone number to,

她的辅导师海利先生吗 to her counselor, Mr. Healy,

然后让他马上打给我 okay, and have him call me right away.

他得马上打给我 He needs to call me right away.

我不能... I'm not allowed- -

求你了 Please, please.

也许可以吧... I guess maybe...

谢谢你 你有... Thank you, thank you. Do you, uh, um...

探访时间将在五分钟后结束 无一例外 Visiting time will be over in five minutes, no exceptions.

我会交给他 I'll pass it along.

好 如果你看到了帕波 Okay. And-and, um, if you see Piper,

你能告诉她我爱她吗 uh, will you, um, will you tell her that I love her, okay,

还有让她给我打电话 and-and, uh, and to call me, have her call me.

还有我爱她 And, also, uh, that-that I love her.

到了探视室 你们就可以拥抱了 Once in the visitation room, you are allowed to hug.

感恩节快乐 布鲁姆先生 Happy Thanksgiving, Mr. Bloom.

-王八蛋 -闭嘴 - Motherfucker! - Shut up!

王八蛋 老子会杀了你 Motherfucker! I'll kill you, motherfucker.

杀了你们这群王八蛋 I'll kill all you motherfuckers!

如果我不能离开这里 我会杀了自己 I'm gonna kill myself if I can't get out of here.

我哥哥多尼去年射杀了一只火鸡 My brother, Donny, shot a turkey last year,

但其实那不是火鸡 而是只秃鹰 but it weren't really a turkey. It was a fucking bald eagle.

但他还是把银子弹啤酒灌进秃鹰肚子里 But he still shoved a Coors Light up the damn thing's ass

然后放在烤架上 and put it on the grill.

接着吃了它 And proceeded to eat it.

森林看守人走过来时 And when the ranger walked up,

那只鸟挂在他嘴上 he had the bird hanging out of his mouth.

他立马坐牢了 He took his ass right to jail.

现在他在弗吉尼亚联邦监狱里 And now he's in Federal, in Virginia.

味道像鸡肉吗 Did it taste like chicken?

不 像鹰肉 No, it tasted like an eagle.

你哥哥吸冰毒吗 Was your brother smoking tina?

他现在吸羟考酮 He snorts Oxy now.

我操 Fuck you.

搞什... 滚开 What the... Get the... The fuck!

谢谢你昨晚如此卖力 宝贝 Thanks for last night, baby.

太美妙了 从没人那样舔过我的小妹妹 That shit was amazing. Nobody's ever licked my pussy like that.

你在撒谎 我才不会碰你这个婊子 You are lying! I would never touch this bitch!

闭嘴 你也想和你朋友一样被关禁闭吗 Hey, knock it off! You wanna join your friend down the hill?

你会进地狱的 You know, you're going to hell!

而且会一直在地狱受尽烈火灼烧 And you're gonna burn there for the entire eternity!

-我已经身处地狱了 -坐吧 - I'm already there. - Have a seat.

尝尝看 诺玛 Taste it, Norma.

我跟你怎么说的 What did I tell you?

简直是完美 It's damn near perfect.

女士们 听着 该走了 Ladies! Listen up! It's time to leave.

走吧 大家都出去 除了你 Let's go! Everybody out, except for you.

你可以留下来 You can stay.

走吧 哑巴 说的就是你 走吧 Let's go, Silent Bob. That means you, too. Come on.

没事 我来接手 It's okay, I'll take over.

好姑娘 Attagirl.

我的东西呢 红妈 Where's my shit, Red?

我不知道你在说什么 I don't know what you're talking about.

真的吗 Really?

你这是逼我翻遍每个箱子吗 Are you gonna make me look through every box in here?

你怎么办到的 拦下卡车了吗 How'd you do it? You stopped the truck?

也许吧 Maybe.

也许是你的一个姑娘告诉我的 Or maybe I got it from one of your girls.

我的姑娘才不会告诉你 My girls wouldn't tell you shit.

想要毒品啊 You want your pills?

你可以把头埋进马桶 You can go stick your head in the toilet.

可能有几片还浮着 There might be a few still floating around.

听我说 你个疯婊子 You listen to me, you crazy cunt!

下次我的货到了 The next time my shipment comes in,

你要把它放在一边 you're gonna put it to the side,

大壁橱最顶层的架子上 top shelf, in the walk-in.

崔希娅在戒毒 Tricia's in detox.

听说卡普托在找她的毒品来源 I hear Caputo's looking for her source.

他会怎么认为你的小生意 What would he think of your little operation?

是你的小生意吧 You mean, your operation?

所有的走私货都经过你的厨房 All the contraband comes through your kitchen.

看来我们冷战对峙了 鲁斯基 Looks like we're at a Cold War stand-off, Ruskie.

而我的武器比你的更大 And I got a bigger weapon than you.

你想看吗 You wanna see it?

为了节日添加的一点料 Just a little something extra for the holidays.

下次你再毁掉我的货 我就杀了你 Next time you fuck with my stash, I'll end your life.

喂 Hello?

喂 你好 Hi! Yes, hi.

你好 我想找 Hello, I am trying to reach

行政助理或者副典狱长 谢谢 the Executive Assistant or the Assistant Warden, please.

先生 我们已经下班了 Sir, it's after duty hours.

好吧 我老婆被关禁闭了 Okay. Yes. Look my wife is in the solitary unit.

好吗 她是被非法关进去的 Okay? She's being held there illegally.

我父亲是律师 我知道她的权利 Now, my father is a lawyer, I know her rights.

今天可是节日啊 先生 It's a holiday, sir.

正是 正是如此 我知道这是节日 Exactly! That's exactly right! I know it's a holiday.

所以这件事才不能忍 That's what makes this so outrageous.

你可以周一再打来 You can call back on Monday...

能不能麻烦你听我说 Would you please listen to me?

先生 拜托 听我说 Sir, please. Listen to me.

我给副典狱长 I have left messages for the Associate Warden,

公共信息官员 for the Public Information's Officer,

惩教局 for the Department of Corrections,

还有州长办公室都留了言 for the fucking Governor's office.

好吗 Okay?

如果没一个人尽快回电 If I don't get a call back from somebody soon,

你们这群人就等着吃官司吧... you people are gonna have a fucking lawsuit on your hands. Now...

你好 你接通了 Hello, you have reached

利奇菲尔德的联邦惩教机构 the Federal Correctional Institution in Litchfield.

天啊 操 God! Fuck!

哥们 真是夸张啊 Dude, that was really dramatic.

你知道帕波有多喜欢感恩节 You know how much Piper loves Thanksgiving.

这是她最爱的节日 It is her favorite.

我不知道原因 Yeah, I don't know why.

还得穿上西服外套 简直有病 Had to wear a suit jacket. Fucking toxic.

你和我爸妈共度过感恩节 You've been to Thanksgiving with my parents.

不 那糟透了 Yeah, no, I know, it's horrible.

她喜欢的是我俩过的感恩节 She loves our Thanksgivings.

在你爸妈的房子里吗 Oh, in your parents' apartment?

他们去南海滩了 他们有游艇 They go to South Beach. They have gravy boats.

有个女佣早上会过来打扫 拜托 A maid comes and cleans up in the morning. Come on.

他们不会介意我用 They won't mind me using these

这些小摆设品装点桌子吧 awesome tchotchkes for my table-scape, will they?

我们得取消 We have to cancel.

我们得取消 你得取消安排 We have to cancel. You have to cancel the whole thing.

卡尔 我现在没法招待客人 好吗 Cal, I can't host people here, all right?

在这种情况下不行 我觉得不对 Not under these circumstances. All right? It does not feel right.

不 你说得对 我们应该取消 No, yeah, you're right, man. We should cancel.

我们会取消 We'll cancel.

我们把镜子盖上 遵守七日丧期的习俗 We'll cover the mirrors, sit shivah.

你们是这样做的对吧 It's what your people do, right?

死人的时候才这样 卡尔 她又没死 It's when someone dies, Cal. She's not dead.

就是 我爱我妹妹 哥们 Exactly. Look, I love my sister, dude.

但是她害自己进了监狱 But she got herself sent to the hoosegow.

现在她肯定又干了别的坏事 And now she's clearly pulled some other shit

惹上了更大的麻烦 to get herself into even more trouble.

你已经尽力而为了 You have done everything that you can do.

帕波肯定会赞同你举办感恩节派对的 And Piper would love the fact that you're throwing Thanksgiving,

我们的朋友要来 女佣明天会来 our friends are coming, the maid is coming tomorrow.

而且我已经花费毕生积蓄 And I've spent my entire life-savings on this,

买了这只棒极了的火鸡 this marvelous turkey.

她会想让我们庆祝的 She'd want us to celebrate.

我肯定她没事 I'm sure she's fine.

杀了我吧

查普曼 Chapman?

海利先生 Mr. Healy?

你还好吗 How are you?

我被关在一个水泥盒子里 I'm in a cement box

人们都在大喊大叫 and people are screaming.

你需要一些时间来考虑你的行为 You needed a little time-out to think about your behavior.

我的什么 My what?

我当时是在跳舞 I was dancing.

挑逗的艳舞 Provocatively. Sexually.

同性恋艳舞 Gay sexually.

这是非法的 你不能把我关在这里 This is illegal. You can't keep me in here.

关于这点你弄错了 See, there's where you're wrong.

查普曼 我想对你好 Chapman, I tried to be nice to you,

因为我知道你的来历 because I understand where you come from.

你不了解我 You don't know me.

我觉得我们可以当朋友 I thought we could be friends.

你最近有些失态 很出格 You're not yourself lately. You're acting out.

你这是在教训我吗 So you're teaching me a lesson?

你应该感谢我 You should be thanking me.

艾丽克斯·沃斯是变态 Alex Vause is sick.

我懂你 I get you.

你和她不一样 You're not like her.

这里唯一的变态就是你 The only sicko here is you.

在别的情况下 又会如何 And under different circumstances, what?

我会当你女朋友吗 I'd be your girlfriend?

是吗 Is that it?

我让你嫉妒了吗 Did I make you jealous?

你毫无理由地把我关在这个鬼地方 You put me in this hellhole for no reason.

醒醒吧 海利 Wake up, Healy!

我这样的女孩 Girls like me?

我们才不干有拉拉情节的 We don't fuck ignorant,

愚昧狂妄的老男人 pretentious old men with weird lesbian obsessions!

我们喜欢又高又辣的美女 We go for tall, hot girls,

我们爱死了 and we fucking love it!

这样只有你自己在外面 So that leaves you on the outside,

过着可悲的生活 living your sad, sad little life.

你永远得不到我 You don't get me! Ever!

自己撸去吧 So go fuck yourself!

感恩节快乐 查普曼 Happy Thanksgiving, Chapman.

去你的 混蛋 Fuck you, motherfucker!

我的床垫呢 Where's my mattress?

我的床垫在哪 你把它弄哪儿去了 Where the fuck is my mattress? What did you do to it?

该死的瘾君子 Oh, fucking crackhead.

我的室友偷了我的床垫 My bunkie stole my mattress.

嗯 然后呢 Yeah. And?

床垫不见了 It's gone. It's not there.

你怎么知道是偷的 Then how do you know it was stolen?

因为它不在我床上了 Because it's not on my bed,

她和她的蠢货朋友还拿我开涮 and she and her hick friend have been fucking with me.

我需要一个新床垫 I need a new one.

好的 我们给每个犯人一个床垫 Okay, we issue one mattress per inmate.

你可以填个表格 You can fill out a form.

换床垫要几周时间 It'll take a couple weeks to replace it.

那在此期间我要怎么办 And what am I supposed to do in the meantime?

睡床板上吗 Sleep on the frame?

这对你有好处 坚硬的床板可以校正脊柱 It's probably good for you. A hard surface aligns the vertebrae.

你的身体会感谢你的 抱歉 Your body will thank you. Excuse me.

你是谁 Who are you?

我是艾丽克斯 I'm Alex.

你的女儿 I'm your daughter.

见鬼 Holy shit.

你怎么找到我的 How'd you find me?

我看了演出 Well, I saw the show.

然后管理人员送我来了后台 And then the manager sent me back here.

你看了那场糟糕的表演 真令人尴尬 Oh, you saw that shit? That was embarrassing.

来的人都塞不满一个地下室了 We can't even fill a fucking basement anymore.

假如再有哪个蠢货让我唱《下流女孩》 If one more jerk-off asks me to play Dirty Girl...

真希望从没写过那首该死的歌 I wish I had never written that fucking song.

那是首伟大的歌曲 现在依然是 It is a great song. That is still a great song.

闭嘴吧 朗尼 Shut up, Lonnie.

我们现在应该在费城的 We're supposed to be in Philly,

但是那个吉米 but Jimmy over here

一拳打在了订票代理人的脖子上 punched the booking agent in the neck.

不敢相信你是我的孩子 你竟然是我的孩子 I can't believe you're my kid, man! You're my kid!

很高兴见到你 I'm so happy to see you.

我也是 Yeah. Me, too.

因为我永远不会认出你 'Cause I would've never recognized you in a million years.

你也是大波妹 And you got a serious rack on you, too.

我可能一不小心就上了她 对吗 I mean, I could have accidentally fucked her, right?

但那样是不好的 But that would have been bad.

说真的 那太变态了 No. Seriously, that's twisted.

当我没说 I didn't say that.

这里有厕所吗 Um, is there a bathroom?

-厕所在哪 -在那边 - Is there a bathroom? - It's down there.

谢谢 Right. Thank you.

大波妹 Her rack?

那就是乱伦了 That would've been fucked up.

她的双峰 Her fucking rack.

天啊 你吓我一跳 Jesus, you scared me.

你没事吧 You okay?

没事 我要回家了 I'm fine. I'm just gonna go home.

他不是你想的那样 He's not what you thought.

真他妈失望 It's fucking depressing.

你一直在想象父女相见的场景 Been imagining this moment your whole life?

我有件白色条纹人造革夹克 I had this white fringe pleather jacket

我一直想在见到他时穿 I always thought I'd wear if I ever met him.

人造革 真好 然后呢 Nice, pleather. What happened?

你是对的 You're right.

或许穿了就会不同了 Maybe that would've made the difference.

多数人在想象中更美好 Most people are better in the abstract.

你是艾丽克斯对吗 It's Alex, right?

对的 Yeah.

我是法赫里 Fahri.

想来一针吗 You want a bump?

不 谢谢 No, thanks.

聪明的女孩 Smart girl.

法赫里 你为什么和这些窝囊废混在一起 Fahri, what are you doing hanging out with these losers?

他们是我的客户 They're my clients.

你是做什么的 What do you do?

我为国际贩毒集团工作 I work for an international drug cartel.

好吧 Right.

能帮我找来歌洛丽娅吗 我要死了 Will you get Gloria? I'm dying.

你不会死的 You're not dying.

给 Here.

你活该 谁让你喝下狗屁祭司 Serves you right for drinking some stupid potion

熬制的药水 from some half-assed santera.

谁告诉你的 Who told you?

她本人告诉我的 She told me.

所以我告诉她给你些树根和浆果 So I told her to give you some roots and berries.

好让你清空大脑 吸取教训 Make you shit your brains out and learn your lesson.

所以茶是骗人的 没用 So the tea was bullshit? It's not gonna work?

你以为我会让你谋杀我的外孙女 You think I'm gonna let you ice my grandbaby?

你想让我落得像你一样的下场 You want me to end up like you?

我已经入狱了 I'm already in prison.

我只需要再有五个孩子 All I need is five different

外加一条屁股上有刺青的狗 就和你一样了 baby daddies and an ass tattoo of a dog.

那是条狼 It's a wolf.

达娅 我做过错事 好吗 Daya, I made mistakes, okay?

没人教我该做什么 I didn't have nobody teaching me what to do.

离我远点 Oh, get away from me.

或许我不是年度最佳母亲 Maybe I'm not the mother of the year...

你觉得呢 Oh, you think?

但是至少我在这个世界上 But at least I put something into this world

还留着有用的人 that could still be good.

我有孩子 I made something.

我的人生糟透了 I fucked up my own life,

但是伊瓦 露西 克里斯蒂娜 艾米利亚诺 but Eva, Lucy and Christina, Emiliano,

甚至还有你 都有可能成就事业 even you could still be something.

婴儿给你希望 Babies give you hope.

妈的 Fuck.

我的天啊 Oh, my God.

发霉了 There's mold.

红肠都长霉了 There's mold on the bologna.

天啊 Oh, my God.

我发现了一只蛆 I found a maggot.

有人吗 Hello?

有人在那吗 Is someone there?

你是真实的吗 Are you real?

是的 你是吗 Yes. Yes, I'm real. Are you real?

我不知道 I don't know.

我要坐公交车到布朗克斯 I'm gonna take a bus all the way to the Bronx.

在安吉洛匹萨店下车 Right to Angelo's Pizza

要一份巨大的匹萨 加所有配料 and I'm gonna get a giant slice with the works.

只要一份 因为这之后 But just one, because after,

我们要在我表姐妮西家 we're gonna have a big old Thanksgiving

举办一场感恩节派对 at my cousin, Neicey, house,

我们可能会去蒙特卡洛酒店跳舞 and we probably gonna go out dancing at the Monte Carlo Room,

我会点一杯"性感沙滩" and I'ma order a Sex on the Beach

里面放十颗马拉斯金樱桃 with 10 maraschino cherries in it.

而且有男人为我买单 And some man gonna buy it for me.

计划不错 Well, that sounds like a plan.

外面没有一个人 You know, ain't no one on the outside

会为了一罐百事可乐这样干活 gonna do my 'do for a can of Pepsi.

顺便一提 你还欠我一罐 Which you still owe me, by the way.

杰弗逊 你被释放了 面包车就要开了 Jefferson, they're releasing you now. Van's leaving.

现在吗 我还要告别 Right now? I gotta say my goodbyes.

今天是假日 狱警想回家看看家人 It's a holiday. COs wanna go home and see their families.

如果你现在不走 If you don't go now,

就只能等到下周一了 走吧 you're not getting out till Monday. Let's go.

珀比人呢 Yo! Where's Poussey at?

杰弗逊 快走 Jefferson! Now.

该死 该死 他们已经把她带走了 What the fuck? What the fuck? They already took her?

我还没对她说再见呢 I didn't even say goodbye.

美味姐 喂 美味姐 Taystee! Yo! Tays!

她听不到 She can't hear you.

-你好 -你好 - Hello? - Hello!

进来吧 新家庭成员 感恩节快乐 Come in, new family. Hello, happy Thanksgiving.

你父母的房子真漂亮 Ooh, your parents have a nice place.

卡尔 好啊 Cal! Hi.

-你认识皮特吗 -不认识 - Hi. Do you know Pete? - Mmm-mmm. No.

这是芬恩 And this is Finn.

他长得真像史蒂夫·布西密[《大西洋帝国》主演] He looks like Steve Buscemi.

恭喜你 伙计 Congratulations, man.

你得先洗洗手 Gotta wash your hands first.

你是不是想要摸宝宝 Isn't that just to touch the baby?

还想和我握手 波丽真是个疯子 And to touch me, too. Polly's being a total nutter.

如果皮特说了算 If it were up to Pete,

他会让他舔他的鞋底的 he'd let him suck on the bottom of his shoe.

希望你们不要介意 我们带来了一个流浪汉 I hope you guys don't mind, but we brought a stray.

-莱瑞 这是我们的朋友莫里 -嗨 - Larry, this is our friend, Maury. - Hi.

莫里·坎德 Yeah, Maury Kind.

抱歉 你不是流浪汉 I'm sorry, you're not a stray.

你是国家公共电台的莫里·坎德 You're Maury Kind from NPR!

-正是在下 -天呐 我喜欢你 - Guilty. - Oh, my God, I love you.

我喜欢你的节目 我喜欢你 I love your show. I mean, I love... I love you.

谢谢 Thank you.

-闪开 莱瑞 -抱歉抱歉 - Back off, Larry. - Sorry, sorry.

-我们把东西放哪 -放在厨房 跟我来 - Where should we put our stuff? - Put it in the kitchen, follow me.

来见见我女朋友 You come meet my girlfriend!

卡尔 别挡她 她正在气头上 Don't get in her way, Cal! She's got an angry, red vagina

她从上午十点就一直在喝朗姆宾治 and she's been drinking rum punch since 10:00 A.M.

谢天谢地终于能缓口气 Thank God we pumped.

真不敢相信你带来了莫里·坎德 I cannot believe you brought Maury Kind.

我在《都市故事》里当调音师 Yeah, I'm mixing sound on Urban Tales.

正好他离婚 所以我请他过来了 He's going through a divorce, so I invited him.

想不到你这么激动 I didn't know you'd geek out so hard.

我很想和他说话 You know, I'd love to talk to him.

如果你不想就奇怪了 Well, it'd be weird if you didn't.

另外 他读过你的《现代爱情》专栏 Besides, he read your "Modern Love" Column

他非常喜欢 and loved it.

真的吗 Stop it. Seriously?

我擦 Holy shit.

注意语言 Your language.

抱歉 Huh? Sorry.

真是混蛋 What an asshole.

我无法想象像他那样的人居然可以在这工作 I cannot believe people like him are even allowed to work here.

他们招募了这些毫无安全感的失意男人 They take these insecure, and frustrated men

让他们管理一群手无寸铁的女人 and they put them in charge of a bunch of powerless women

这些男人变成了衣冠禽兽 and they become these predatory creeps.

那些看似谦逊的话 I mean, all of that condescending

"我知道什么对你最好" 纯放屁 "I know what's best for you" bullshit.

你可以发怒 但最后赢的总是他们 You can rage, but they always win.

钥匙在他们身上 They're the ones with the keys.

你在这关禁闭多久了 How long have you been down here?

我已经忘记了 我不知道 I've lost track. I don't know.

九个月 Nine months?

一年 A year?

一年 A year?

太疯狂了 That's insane.

他们一直开着灯 你失去了时间感 They keep the lights on, so you lose all sense of time.

这不算活着 It's not living.

确实 你还在呼吸 I mean, yeah, you're breathing,

但你不再是一个人了 but you ain't a person no more.

很糟糕 你开始产生幻觉 It's bad. You start to see shit that ain't there.

开始产生幻听 You start to hear voices.

天啊 Oh, my God.

他们把你关在这里 直到你崩溃为止 They keep you here till they break you.

我感觉我快吐了 I feel like I'm gonna throw up.

我为什么那么做 Why did I do that?

我为什么说出那些话 Why did I say those things?

他永远不会放我出去了 He's never going to let me out of here.

我真他妈蠢 I am so fucking stupid.

我真他妈蠢 I am so fucking stupid!

我到底怎么搞的 What's wrong with me?

你还在听我说话吗 You still there?

我对天发誓 如果他们放我出去 I swear to God that if they let me out of here...

我会闭嘴 I will shut up.

我会乖乖闭嘴 保持低调 认真服刑 I will shut up and I will put my head down and I will do my time

我会一直对海利微笑 不会再靠近她了 and I'll smile at Healy and I won't go near her.

我不会再正眼看她了 I won't even look at her.

我能做到 我能做到 I can do that. I can do that. I can.

求你了 Please.

别把我关在这 Please don't leave me here.

求你了 Please.

沃斯 我知道你没在工作 能把包给我吗 Hey, Vause, I know you're not working, but can I get my bag?

好的 稍等一会 Yeah, just give me a sec.

你的眼镜怎么了 What happened to your glasses?

看在老天的份上 烂了 Smashed in the name of Jesus.

见鬼 是佩萨塔琪干的 Oh, shit. Pennsatucky?

你们放出了北海巨妖啊 Wow, you guys have released the kraken.

她觉得消灭我是她作为基督教徒的责任 She's decided it's her Christian duty to annihilate me.

因为我是"享有特权的富家女" Because I'm a "Privileged rich girl."

真是搞笑 因为那些富家女 Which is hilarious, because those types of girls

折磨了我一辈子 tortured me my whole fucking life.

如果咱俩在五年级见面 If you and I had met in fifth grade,

你肯定会嘲笑我的衣服 you'd have made fun of my clothes.

谁 我吗 Who, me?

不不不 绝对不会的 No, no, no, no. I would never.

-你看起来棒极了 -去你的 - You look terrific. - Fuck!

我知道你的出身 I know what you were like.

上西区 家门口有看门人 Upper West Side, doorman building,

去杰克逊霍尔滑雪 skiing in Jackson Hole.

我说错了吗 Am I wrong?

-这是谁瞎说的 -没人 - Who told you that shit? - No one.

我的生意就是建立在寻找你这种女孩之上 My business was built on sniffing out girls like you

再把她们变成毒骡 and turning 'em into drug mules.

我知道了 你是个皮条客 I knew it. You're a pimp.

你太完美了 Man, you would've been perfect.

19岁的小妮琪 Little Nicky at 19? Mmm!

我两秒钟就能说服你干这行 I would've turned you out in two seconds.

我是个糟糕的毒骡 我会自己把毒品吸了 I'd make a terrible mule. I would've done all your drugs.

另外 你为什么认为 Besides, okay, what makes you think

我会听你的鬼话 I would've fallen for your shit?

你是富家千金 习惯于钱来伸手 Well, you grew up rich, so you're used to easy money.

你护照上有很多印章 不会引起怀疑 You have enough stamps in your passport to avoid suspicion.

-你讨厌父母 -是的 超讨厌 - You hate your parents. - Yeah, totally.

你现在处于实验阶段 You're in your experimental phase.

你只想搞女人或者黑人 All you wanna do is fuck a woman or black guy,

来一段冒险 have some adventure... Hmm.

同时还买得起柏金包 ...and still be able to afford a Birkin bag.

见鬼 我加入 Shit, I'm in!

该死 你懂我 Fuck it. You know me.

签了我 Sign me up.

帕波也是做这个的 Oh, was that who Piper was?

不 帕波不同 No, no, Piper was different.

为什么 因为你爱她 Why? 'Cause you loved her?

因为她与众不同 Because she was different.

用胶水粘上 皮条客 Get some glue, pimp.

该死 Fuck.

克里斯托和她的牧师相爱了 Crystal is in love with her pastor.

我一点也不惊讶 I'm not surprised.

很多女人都渴求她们的牧师 很常见 A lot of women lust after their pastors, it's very common.

牧师可以干那种勾当 And pastors can do that.

神父需要学会避开她们的眼神 Priests have to learn to bounce their eyes.

那是什么 Um, what's that?

永远不要将目光 You never stay focused on

长时间集中在一个异性身上 a member of the opposite sex for too long.

我就是这样看罗素·克洛的电影的 That's how I watch every Russell Crowe movie.

她想要我的祝福 She wants my blessing.

那你就该给她 Then you should give it to her.

为什么 Why?

我不懂为什么她需要性爱 I don't understand why she needs to have sex.

瞧瞧你 I mean, look at you.

我是修女 我许下了誓言 I'm a nun, I took a vow.

她和有老二的男人结婚了 She married a man with a penis,

我猜是因为她想用一用 I assume because she wanted to use it occasionally.

你还要在监狱待多久 How much time do you have left?

三年零八个月 Three years, eight months.

你的家庭付出巨大代价后 你如愿以偿了 You got what you needed at a pretty big cost to your family.

这是她需要的 This is what she needs.

难道克里斯托不该拥有幸福吗 Doesn't Crystal deserve some happiness?

放手吧 Let her go.

我做不到 I can't.

这么做是正确的 It's the right thing to do.

还要再来点甘薯吗 Did you want some more sweet potatoes?

内莉 你是做什么的 So, Neri, what do you do?

我是个高压焊工 I'm a hyperbaric welder.

过去在流水线上工作 Yeah, I used to work on the pipelines,

但现在我只是个普通焊工 but now I just normal weld.

她是不是很厉害 Isn't she a badass?

在我制作雕像的时候 我们相遇了 We met when I was fabricating some sculptures.

我有很多灼伤疤痕 Hmm, I have so many burn scars,

我和卡尔都给它们取上名字了 Cal and I are naming them.

说到伤疤 生育的事怎么样了 Oh, oh! Speaking of scars, how was it? The whole birth thing?

你吃了自己的胎盘了吗 Did you eat your placenta?

没有 我们放弃了 No. We passed on that.

这对你真的有好处 胎盘蕴含丰富的营养 Oh, it's really good for you. Crazy nutrients.

人们将它脱水 做成药片 People dehydrate it and make it into pills,

不过这样一来比较昂贵 but that's the expensive way.

我觉得你可以搅拌一下 I always just thought you could, like, scramble it up.

放进锅里 加些盐和胡椒 Just, like, put it in a pan with some salt and pepper.

听起来恶心 但可能非常美味 Bam! It sounds gross, but possibly delicious.

也放点鼠尾草进去 Throw some sage in there, too.

-你还留着吗 -没有 - Do you still have it? - I don't.

皮特 你把食物掉在他头上了 Pete, you're dropping food on his head.

是的 我们决定坚持到底 So, yeah, you know, we both decided to stick it out, you know.

这并不容易 I mean, it hasn't been easy,

但是 情感关系本来就是门复杂的学问 but, you know, relationships are not easy.

-对吗 -对的 - Right? - Right. Yeah.

我认为你的专栏是一个很有趣的角度 Well, I thought your column was an interesting perspective.

长期忍受折磨的丈夫 You know, the long-suffering husband.

未婚夫 Fiance.

我真的不是有意那样写的 I mean, I didn't really mean for it to come off that way.

不不不 非常有趣 No. No, no, no, it was very entertaining.

-谢谢 -嗯 - Thank you... Yeah. - Yeah.

-我是你的铁杆粉丝 我是说 -好吧 - Well, I'm a big fan of yours. I mean... - Oh, well.

我喜欢你的节目... Yeah, I love your show and...

我刚才在路上开车时还听了一段 I was just listening to the one on road trips.

卡尔 火鸡做的太棒了 Cal, the turkey is amazing.

火候完美 It's perfectly cooked.

谢谢伙计 这是只传统血系火鸡 Thanks, man. It's a heritage bird.

说真的 莫里 Actually, Maury, um...

我认为说出我的故事效果会很好 I was thinking that my story would work really well aloud.

-对 -因为我认为自己是个 - Right. - You know, 'cause I consider myself

更好的口头讲述者 a much better verbal storyteller.

-对 -我不知道你是否曾... - Right. - You know, I don't know if you ever...

卡尔 什么是血系 抱歉 你说什么 Cal, what is a heritage... I'm sorry, what was that?

抱歉 你不知道你是否 Sorry. No, I didn't know if you

愿意做一期监狱系列的节目 ever were open to maybe doing a prison episode.

如果你可以邀请到像我这样的嘉宾 You know, if you ever had guests like me on.

问题是 如果我们想记录监狱的事 Yeah. The thing is, if we wanted to document prison,

我们可能会亲自与囚犯对话 we'd probably talk to actual inmates.

如果我们要做一个 And if we were gonna do a story

关于爱人在监狱中服刑的故事 about someone whose loved one was in prison,

我们会找一个更典型的例子 we'd find a more representative example.

贫穷的轮回 诸如此类 Cycle of poverty, that sort of thing.

对的 不...我...有道理 我懂了 Right. Yeah, no, that... I get... That makes sense. I get it.

但是我们在做一个 But we are working on a show

关于与众不同的异地恋的节目 about unique long-distance relationships.

男人的地位一降再降 You know, a guy who works down on the ice every year,

一对已婚传教士 a pair of married missionaries.

你的故事很合适 Your story could be good on that.

-真的吗 -嗯 - Really? - Yeah.

好的 我是说... Wow. Yeah. I mean...

我非常乐意 Wow, I would love that.

我非常乐意 I mean, I would love to do that.

-干杯 -好的 - Hey, toast! - Yes!

-干杯 -干杯 - Toast. - Cheers.

-感恩节快乐 -感恩节快乐 - Happy Thanksgiving. - Happy Thanksgiving.

注意目光交流 Eye contact.

没有肉汁 No gravy?

为什么没有肉汁 Why is there no gravy?

你是在抱怨 You complaining?

不不不 女士 我没有 Uh... No, ma'am. No, no, no.

小嘣 走吧 不要抱怨 Come on, Little Boo. Let's not complain.

我不知道你为什么要倒掉 I don't know why you threw it out.

我尝过了 味道很赞 I tried it. It tasted great to me.

我感谢我的健康 我健壮的身体和精神 I'm thankful for my health, for my strong body and mind.

感谢你们这些女孩 你们每天都在提醒我 And for you girls, who remind me every day

自我宽恕是可能的 that self-forgiveness is possible.

我感谢美味姐脱离了苦海 I'm thankful that Taystee got the fuck out of this dump.

是的 我同意 Yeah, I'll second that.

我感谢我的新伙伴 小嘣 I'm thankful for my new bitch, Little Boo.

坐下 婊子 好孩子 Sit, hooker. Ah! Good girl.

给你 There you go.

当然 我感谢你们这些女人 Oh, and, of course, I'm thankful for all y'all other bitches.

你要做饭前祈祷吗 修女 Do you wanna say grace, Sister?

我全心全意地相信上帝 I trust in the Lord with all my heart

不依靠自己的理解 and lean not on my own understanding.

阿门 Amen.

阿门 Amen.

阿门 Amen.

很难换掉眼镜 Man, it sucks to get glasses replaced,

你得让外面的人帮你填张处方单 you have to get someone on the outside to fill your prescription.

你能看得多清楚 How blind are you?

一片模糊 Blindish.

往好的方面想 你看不清这些土豆的颜色 Bright side, you can't see the color of these potatoes.

她被关在里面 我们却在这吃饭 It doesn't feel right to be eating

感觉不大好 while she's in there.

直女 她们会一直和你们对着来 Straight girls. They'll fuck you up every time.

你的饭里有肉糕吗 Did you get this loaf thing?

看着像三种剩菜绞碎了揉在一起的 Looks like three different dinners mushed together into a mound.

你在看吗 Are you looking at it?

有人吗 Hello?

能听到我说话吗 Can you hear me?

拜托 请告诉我你还在 Please tell me that you're still there.

你不能把她留在那里 You can't leave her in there.

我起初都不知道她在禁闭室里干什么 I don't know what the hell she's doing in Seg in the first place.

天啊 甚至曼多萨都说这是不必要的 Christ, even Mendez said it was uncalled for

那家伙超爱把囚犯关禁闭 and that guy lives to throw people in the box.

-你不是我的领导 -今天我是了 - You're not my boss. - Today I am.

菲格度假去了 Fig is on vacation.

我告诉你 我没有报告 And I am telling you I don't have the write-ups

或文件支持这一决定 or the paperwork to support it.

她激怒了你 山姆 这是私事 She got under your skin, Sam. This is personal.

她以为她是老大 She thinks she's running the place.

你没必要告诉我 You don't have to tell me that.

她的未婚夫引起的轩然大波 Her fiance is raising a stink

比我今天早上碰到的破事更严重 bigger than the shit I took this morning.

天啊 他可能现在和奥巴马总统通话了 Christ, he's probably got the Obamas on the phone by now.

这些自由 富有的罪犯 他们是一伙的 These liberal, wealthy offenders, they're connected.

如果他们查起这件事 And if they review this,

书面记录工作会很繁重的 the paper trail is going to be sweaty.

所以帮我们个忙 放了她 So do us all a favor and get her out of there.

还不到48小时 It's not even 48 hours.

放她出来 Get her out of there.

抱歉让你感觉糟糕 奇卡 I'm sorry you feeling like shit, Chica,

但我不得不这么做 but I had to do it.

没事 事实上 我已经释然了 It's okay. I'm relieved, actually.

我想留住孩子 I wanna keep it.

但我也不想让他惹上麻烦 But I don't wanna get him in trouble, though.

别担心 妮娜 办法总会有的 Don't worry, Nena. We'll figure something out.

你要有孩子了 我要当外婆了 You're gonna have a baby. I'm gonna be a grandmother.

喂 Hello?

一位来自利奇菲尔德联邦监狱的囚犯 An inmate from Litchfield Federal Prison

试图联系你 is attempting to contact you.

接受电话 请按1 To accept the call, please press one.

宝贝 是我 Baby? It's me.

我刚上车 Uh, I'm just getting in the car.

不会耽误你太久 I'll just take a minute.

我错了 I was wrong.

去做你需要做的事情 You do whatever you need to do.

我保佑你 You have my blessing.

谢谢 Thank you.

感恩节快乐 Happy Thanksgiving.

感恩节快乐 Happy Thanksgiving.

你是乔西的女儿 You Josie's girl?

我表姐妮西告诉我我可以住在这里 My cousin, Neicey, told me I could stay here.

妮西不在这住了 Neicey don't live here no more.

我知道她不是你表姐 And I know she ain't your cousin.

我们寄养在同一个家庭 We had the same foster family.

听着 我可不想让有犯罪前科的人 Look, I ain't getting my ass in trouble

住在我家里 惹上一屁股麻烦 letting some ex-con stay in my house.

但我必须住在这里 But I have to stay here.

这是我给监管员的地址 This is the address I gave my supervisor.

司法系统会来核实的 The system gonna come check on me.

这不是我的问题 That ain't my problem.

我无处可去了 I ain't got nowhere else to stay at.

该死 Shit.

你可以睡在那个角落里 You can sleep in that corner.

在地板上 On the floor.

别碰那个床垫 Leave that mattress where it is.

因为我可不想再让哪个狗娘养的 'Cause I ain't having no rape motherfuckers

从那个安全出口进来了 coming in off that fire-escape again.

明早你就走 懂了吗 And you're out in the morning, understand?

伯赛特 Hmm, Burset.

你给我四粒 Um... You gave me four.

来了个新医生 Yeah, new doctor.

他说你的记录表是错的 He said your chart was wrong.

所以你恢复了以前的剂量 So you're back to your old dosage.

谢谢 Thank you.

-什么 -谢谢 - Hmm? - Thank you.

查普曼 你被释放了 Chapman! You're out.

回牢房去吧 Back to camp.

海利先生 Mr. Healy?

帕波·查普曼的未婚夫在她关禁闭时看她了 Piper Chapman's fiance came to visit while she was in lock-up.

然后 And?

他留了电话 先生 He left his number, sir.

抱歉 我知道那违反规定 I'm sorry, I know that's against the rules,

但他想知道她为什么被关禁闭 but he wanted to know why she was in SHU.

好的 谢谢 交给我吧 Okay. Thank you. I'll take that.

喂 Hello?

喂 布鲁姆先生 Hello, Mr. Bloom?

我是惩教局的辅导师海利 This is Counselor Healy from the Department of Corrections.

我这有你未婚妻的信息 I have some information

你可能会感兴趣 that might interest you regarding your fiancee.

天啊 查普曼 你解禁了 Holy shit, Chapman, you're out.

天啊 Oh, my God...

-我们离开这 -你没事吧 - Let's get out of here. - Are you okay?

我们来这干吗 What are we doing here?