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♪ Who put the "glad" in Gladiator? ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Whose daring deeds are great theater? ♪
4
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♪ Hercules ♪
5
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♪ Is he bold? ♪
6
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♪ No one braver ♪
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♪ Is he sweet? ♪
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♪ Our favorite flavor, Hercules ♪
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-♪ What a guy ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
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-♪ Ask his friends ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
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-♪ Hercules ♪-♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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-♪ Come on ♪-♪ No one's fool ♪
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♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
17
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♪ He's in trainin' ♪
18
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♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
20
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♪ No complainin' ♪
21
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♪ He was a no one ♪
22
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♪ Zero, zero, give him a quick deed ♪
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♪ He's our hero ♪
24
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♪ He's the most likely to succeed ♪
25
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♪ From zero to hero ♪
26
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♪ Herc is a hero ♪
27
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♪ He'll be a hero ♪
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Wait and see!
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[Bob reading]
30
00:01:06,458 --> 00:01:08,875
Fee, fi, fo, fum.
31
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Hero rule nine-- Giants are...
32
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Dumb!
33
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That's why you use the "too-tall
triad" against them.
34
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Fake, rattle-- Pbht!-- And roll!
35
00:01:19,250 --> 00:01:20,959
That's fake, battle, and roll, kid.
36
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Giants are too dumb to get rattled.
37
00:01:23,250 --> 00:01:25,959
[groans] I'm not so great at giants.
38
00:01:26,041 --> 00:01:28,166
Can we just skip this part, huh?
39
00:01:28,250 --> 00:01:31,375
Sorry, kid, no shortcuts to greatness.
40
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[man] Wow. That is some fabulous,
fabulous work.
41
00:01:33,875 --> 00:01:35,625
I mean, what a presence you've got.
42
00:01:35,709 --> 00:01:37,500
Hercules, you're my man.
43
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Did I pronounce that right?
I'm such a huge fan of yours.
44
00:01:40,417 --> 00:01:42,834
I can't even tell you to have this kind of
face-to-face with you...
45
00:01:42,917 --> 00:01:44,625
Listen, can we talk,
or do you have an agent?
46
00:01:44,709 --> 00:01:45,750
Uh, yeah, well --
47
00:01:45,834 --> 00:01:48,458
Hey, hotshot, this is a closed practice.
48
00:01:48,542 --> 00:01:50,542
You are one lucky little goat
man, you know that?
49
00:01:50,625 --> 00:01:53,041
I mean, your boy is so money,
and he doesn't even know it, brother.
50
00:01:53,125 --> 00:01:54,000
You think so?
51
00:01:54,083 --> 00:01:56,625
Who are you, and what's with that get-up?
52
00:01:56,709 --> 00:01:57,667
This is my card.
53
00:01:58,750 --> 00:02:02,333
"Loki-- trickster god of the
Norse Pantheon."
54
00:02:02,417 --> 00:02:04,083
Hmph. Barbarian, huh?
55
00:02:04,166 --> 00:02:05,333
Yeah, that's interesting.
56
00:02:05,417 --> 00:02:07,208
The goat man just called me a barbarian.
57
00:02:07,291 --> 00:02:10,875
Anyway, look, There is a major,
major buzz about Hercules.
58
00:02:10,959 --> 00:02:12,458
You know what I mean?
And from what I just saw,
59
00:02:12,542 --> 00:02:14,875
I think you're ready for the big
show-- truth, truth.
60
00:02:14,959 --> 00:02:16,208
Uh, what show?
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00:02:16,291 --> 00:02:18,208
Asgard-- The realm of the Norse Gods!
62
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We're looking to fill a new
position-- Thunder God--
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00:02:20,542 --> 00:02:23,208
Cranking out storms, deciding battle
frenzies. You know that sort of thing.
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00:02:23,291 --> 00:02:24,750
Fun stuff. Are you interested?
65
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Me? A God?
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Ha-ha! I'm there!
67
00:02:28,250 --> 00:02:30,333
Whoa, slow down, Goldilocks.
68
00:02:30,417 --> 00:02:32,250
He's training to be a Greek hero.
69
00:02:32,333 --> 00:02:34,208
Oh, right, right. Let's see --
70
00:02:34,291 --> 00:02:36,959
"Reaching for the brass ring to
join mom and pop on Olympus."
71
00:02:37,041 --> 00:02:39,291
Yeah, but how do you know that?
72
00:02:39,375 --> 00:02:40,583
Look, I do my research.
73
00:02:40,667 --> 00:02:42,500
Anyway, let's cut to the chase here, OK?
74
00:02:42,583 --> 00:02:45,583
Now, the plain truth is I want
to be in the Hercules business.
75
00:02:45,667 --> 00:02:47,542
But you gotta help, Herc. I mean,
you want Olympus, right?
76
00:02:47,625 --> 00:02:48,792
Well, that's doable, very doable.
77
00:02:48,875 --> 00:02:51,041
But at the end of the day,
you're gonna need some credits.
78
00:02:51,125 --> 00:02:51,959
Credits?
79
00:02:52,041 --> 00:02:53,625
You know, actual God gigs.
80
00:02:53,709 --> 00:02:56,333
I mean, this hero training, that's such
a slow track.
81
00:02:56,417 --> 00:02:58,500
But we make you a God now-- pow, baby!
82
00:02:58,583 --> 00:03:00,667
We're talking a-list! You got juice!
83
00:03:00,750 --> 00:03:03,041
Olympus, they come calling
for you, capiche?
84
00:03:03,125 --> 00:03:04,375
Uh, capiche.
85
00:03:04,458 --> 00:03:07,333
Kid, kid, no shortcuts, remember?
86
00:03:07,417 --> 00:03:09,208
Phil, Phil, my goat man.
87
00:03:09,291 --> 00:03:10,834
Have you ever heard of the Valkyries?
88
00:03:11,500 --> 00:03:13,125
See, the valkyries are, like, a
group of ladies.
89
00:03:13,208 --> 00:03:14,083
Really?
90
00:03:14,166 --> 00:03:16,166
You know, very friendly. You know.
91
00:03:16,250 --> 00:03:18,083
[chuckles] That kind of thing.
92
00:03:18,166 --> 00:03:20,291
-No kidding.
-Yes. Yes.
93
00:03:20,375 --> 00:03:22,291
Kid, let's go for it!
94
00:03:22,375 --> 00:03:24,834
But you said no shortcuts.
95
00:03:24,917 --> 00:03:30,291
I know, I know, but think about it.
Valkyries! Valhalla!
96
00:03:30,375 --> 00:03:33,208
Yeah, hey, that's supposed to be
a state-of-the-art facility.
97
00:03:33,291 --> 00:03:34,333
Valhalla?
98
00:03:34,417 --> 00:03:37,083
Oh, they say it's a beautiful palace.
99
00:03:37,166 --> 00:03:41,458
Across the rainbow bridge of
Bifrost to the plane of Asgard.
100
00:03:41,542 --> 00:03:47,041
There rises Valhalla, Hall of Odin,
king of the Norse Gods.
101
00:03:47,125 --> 00:03:50,667
Valhalla. Okay. Okay, Mr. Loki.
102
00:03:50,750 --> 00:03:53,291
We'll go take a look. What can it hurt?
103
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Behold Valhalla!
104
00:03:56,500 --> 00:04:00,166
-[wind howling]
-[shivering] That-- that's it?
105
00:04:00,250 --> 00:04:01,625
It's a dump!
106
00:04:01,709 --> 00:04:02,834
Goatie, you wouldn't know class
107
00:04:02,917 --> 00:04:04,291
if it came up and bit you on the tail.
108
00:04:04,375 --> 00:04:06,583
This is retro, baby.
109
00:04:06,667 --> 00:04:10,125
[indistinct conversations]
110
00:04:10,959 --> 00:04:12,083
Pass the salt, then.
111
00:04:12,166 --> 00:04:15,000
Hey, hey, get your beard outta
my cheese, there, would ya?
112
00:04:15,083 --> 00:04:17,041
Hey, hey, hold it! Close the door!
113
00:04:17,125 --> 00:04:18,417
I'm freezing in here.
114
00:04:18,500 --> 00:04:20,500
Where were you born, in a barn, there?
115
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[grunts]
116
00:04:21,625 --> 00:04:23,417
Silence, pathetic mortals. Where's Odin?
117
00:04:23,542 --> 00:04:26,582
Uh, gee, sorry, Loki.
Didn't see you there.
118
00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:28,750
Yah, boy, we totally worship ya.
119
00:04:28,834 --> 00:04:31,125
Wonderful, wonderful. Where is Odin?
120
00:04:31,207 --> 00:04:33,082
Uh, Odin's out talking to Mimir.
121
00:04:33,166 --> 00:04:36,332
You know, that-that disembodied head,
there, in-in the well of wisdom?
122
00:04:36,417 --> 00:04:39,041
He's talking to the head again.
That's really great, great.
123
00:04:39,125 --> 00:04:41,417
Now this is Hercules.
124
00:04:41,500 --> 00:04:43,582
Now please, take care of him, boys.
He's with daddy.
125
00:04:43,667 --> 00:04:46,082
Okay, I'm gonna be right back
with Odin, Herc. Stay who you are.
126
00:04:46,166 --> 00:04:47,709
Uh, whatever you say, Loki.
127
00:04:47,792 --> 00:04:49,207
Yah, pull up a stump.
128
00:04:49,291 --> 00:04:51,959
I'm Jorgen Svensen and that
there's Sven Jorgensen.
129
00:04:52,041 --> 00:04:53,875
Okay, so, uh, have a chop, then.
130
00:04:53,959 --> 00:04:55,125
Yeah, yeah. Eat up, kid.
131
00:04:55,207 --> 00:04:57,667
I'm gonna see if I can find me
some of them Valkyries.
132
00:04:57,750 --> 00:04:59,834
You're... You aren't from around here,
are ya?
133
00:04:59,917 --> 00:05:01,959
Mnh-mnh. Greece.
134
00:05:02,041 --> 00:05:05,333
Yah, I can tell by that flimsy
dress you're wearing there.
135
00:05:05,417 --> 00:05:08,792
Yeah, don't ya-- don't ya get
just a tidge drafty in there?
136
00:05:08,875 --> 00:05:10,125
Ahh.
137
00:05:10,208 --> 00:05:11,792
You missed a spot, Brunhilda.
138
00:05:11,875 --> 00:05:14,250
Ho-ho! What have we here?
139
00:05:14,333 --> 00:05:16,207
The sacred Mead of Poetry.
140
00:05:16,291 --> 00:05:19,082
He who drinks of it
shall speak only in verse.
141
00:05:21,082 --> 00:05:22,000
Ahh!
142
00:05:22,082 --> 00:05:24,082
Say, that mead is quite delish.
143
00:05:24,166 --> 00:05:26,375
And you, my dear, what a dish!
144
00:05:26,457 --> 00:05:28,667
Mm! Mmm!
145
00:05:28,750 --> 00:05:32,166
This is really, really good.
What is it?
146
00:05:32,250 --> 00:05:33,792
That would be your reindeer.
147
00:05:33,875 --> 00:05:35,125
[coughs]
148
00:05:35,207 --> 00:05:37,625
So, uh, this Valhalla
149
00:05:37,709 --> 00:05:39,792
must be an interesting place to live, huh?
150
00:05:39,875 --> 00:05:41,917
Wouldn't know, seein' as how we're dead.
151
00:05:42,000 --> 00:05:44,500
You're dead? As in-- as in dead?
152
00:05:44,582 --> 00:05:47,082
Oh, yeah. Deader than doornails.
Dead, dead, dead.
153
00:05:47,166 --> 00:05:50,166
This is Valhalla-- The hall
of slain heroes.
154
00:05:50,250 --> 00:05:53,082
Odin,The Allfather, he likes to hang out
with dead guys, don't ya know?
155
00:05:53,166 --> 00:05:55,082
Dead guys? Eww!
156
00:05:55,166 --> 00:05:58,375
Okay, so you're not dead then, eh?
157
00:05:58,457 --> 00:06:00,792
No. I'm gonna be Thunder God.
158
00:06:00,875 --> 00:06:03,000
[men murmuring]
159
00:06:03,834 --> 00:06:05,250
You were gonna scratch my head.
160
00:06:05,333 --> 00:06:06,834
What? Was it something I said?
161
00:06:06,917 --> 00:06:10,125
So, uh, you're gonna be
Thunder God, uh-huh?
162
00:06:10,208 --> 00:06:11,291
Who says, then?
163
00:06:11,375 --> 00:06:13,208
Um, this guy named Loki.
164
00:06:13,291 --> 00:06:15,917
Yah, but everybody knows Odin's boy,
165
00:06:16,000 --> 00:06:17,332
he's gonna be the Thunder God.
166
00:06:17,417 --> 00:06:18,457
[rattling]
167
00:06:18,542 --> 00:06:20,959
I now return from the well of wisdom.
168
00:06:21,041 --> 00:06:22,082
Spoke with Mimir.
169
00:06:22,166 --> 00:06:23,500
He's still very wise.
170
00:06:23,582 --> 00:06:26,959
Oh, yeah, I'm sure about that.
Anyway, I have a brainstorm.
171
00:06:27,041 --> 00:06:28,750
Got some nice cod, too. Hungry?
172
00:06:28,834 --> 00:06:30,125
No. Anyway--
173
00:06:30,207 --> 00:06:32,667
Hey, Odin, check out this new kid,
would ya?
174
00:06:32,750 --> 00:06:33,792
He's not even dead.
175
00:06:33,875 --> 00:06:36,207
Yah. And he says he's gonna be
the Thunder God.
176
00:06:36,291 --> 00:06:37,792
That so? Hmm.
177
00:06:37,875 --> 00:06:38,917
I was getting to that.
178
00:06:39,000 --> 00:06:41,417
Oh, hi, sir. I, [clears throat]
Odin.
179
00:06:41,500 --> 00:06:43,792
I don't want to cause any trouble, so--
180
00:06:43,875 --> 00:06:45,250
Trouble. [chuckles]
181
00:06:45,332 --> 00:06:47,500
No, you're perfect for this part.
Relax, baby.
182
00:06:47,582 --> 00:06:51,332
Loki, I have someone in mind
for Thunder God, you know that.
183
00:06:51,417 --> 00:06:54,625
Yeah, right. You're gonna cast your own
son. Can we say favoritism here?
184
00:06:54,709 --> 00:06:58,625
We all know, we need the best possible
Thunder God to stop Ragnarok.
185
00:06:58,709 --> 00:06:59,834
What's Ragnarok?
186
00:06:59,917 --> 00:07:01,333
Oh, it's your basic
187
00:07:01,375 --> 00:07:03,250
end-of-the-world, day-of-doom
type of deal.
188
00:07:03,333 --> 00:07:04,458
I'm on it. Don't worry.
189
00:07:04,542 --> 00:07:07,834
Now surely the oh-so-wise Odin
will consider other candidates,
190
00:07:07,917 --> 00:07:11,291
for he is a fair God, you know,
an equal-opportunity god.
191
00:07:11,375 --> 00:07:14,542
All right, Loki.
If it's the fair thing to do.
192
00:07:14,625 --> 00:07:17,792
Okay, now meet Hercules,
Greek hero in training.
193
00:07:17,875 --> 00:07:19,457
Give him your resume, champ.
194
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:23,582
Hmm, Greek. Hermod.
195
00:07:23,667 --> 00:07:25,166
Yeah, sure, you betcha.
196
00:07:25,250 --> 00:07:26,457
Translate this, please.
197
00:07:26,542 --> 00:07:29,332
Okay, let's see, then--
"Hercules demigod..."
198
00:07:29,417 --> 00:07:32,375
Greek Gods and Norse Gods
are two of a pair.
199
00:07:32,457 --> 00:07:35,417
He looks just like Hermes,
with more facial hair.
200
00:07:35,500 --> 00:07:36,500
[reading indistinctly]
201
00:07:36,582 --> 00:07:38,166
Hey, why are you talking like that?
202
00:07:38,250 --> 00:07:40,709
I drank some mead, and now I can't stop
203
00:07:40,792 --> 00:07:44,041
talking verses and poems and all
of that glop! Aah!
204
00:07:44,125 --> 00:07:47,500
Don't get much call for lion
taming up here-- wrong climate.
205
00:07:47,582 --> 00:07:49,542
How are you against giants, son?
206
00:07:49,625 --> 00:07:50,750
Oh, giants. Well--
207
00:07:50,834 --> 00:07:52,750
Oh,let's just make this easy.
An audition--
208
00:07:52,834 --> 00:07:53,917
My boy against your boy.
One-on one.
209
00:07:54,000 --> 00:07:56,291
The winner gets his name
in northern lights.
210
00:07:56,375 --> 00:07:58,625
The son of Odin against him?
211
00:07:59,291 --> 00:08:01,041
So be it.
212
00:08:01,125 --> 00:08:04,959
Hercules shall compete
for the job of Thunder God
213
00:08:05,041 --> 00:08:09,458
against he of the sinewy calves,
wielder of the iron gloves,
214
00:08:09,542 --> 00:08:11,375
wearer of the magic girdle--
215
00:08:11,458 --> 00:08:12,959
[bleating]
216
00:08:13,041 --> 00:08:15,417
Behold my boy Thor.
217
00:08:15,500 --> 00:08:17,625
Ah-ha-ha!
218
00:08:17,709 --> 00:08:21,082
Who dares challenge Thor?
219
00:08:22,332 --> 00:08:23,917
Hi. Nice to meet you.
220
00:08:24,000 --> 00:08:25,582
Ah-ha-ha!
221
00:08:26,625 --> 00:08:28,332
That's a little loud, son.
222
00:08:28,417 --> 00:08:33,040
Anyway, to the victor goes
the mighty hammer... Mjollnir.
223
00:08:33,165 --> 00:08:35,082
May the godliest hero win.
224
00:08:35,165 --> 00:08:37,582
Oh, and no divine intervention.
225
00:08:37,667 --> 00:08:39,250
Loki, no funny business.
226
00:08:39,332 --> 00:08:41,165
I'm just here
for the reaction shot, chief.
227
00:08:41,250 --> 00:08:43,709
You are puny. Are you a troll?
228
00:08:43,792 --> 00:08:45,542
I'm a hero in training!
229
00:08:45,625 --> 00:08:48,458
No, kid! Rushing in
will be your ruination!
230
00:08:48,542 --> 00:08:50,667
Stop! Take your time! Assess the...
231
00:08:50,750 --> 00:08:51,959
[grunts]
232
00:08:52,040 --> 00:08:53,290
Situation.
233
00:08:53,375 --> 00:08:55,417
Okay, so you have magic gloves,
234
00:08:55,500 --> 00:08:58,375
but no way are you as strong as I am.
235
00:08:58,917 --> 00:09:01,500
[groaning]
236
00:09:01,750 --> 00:09:03,458
[screams]
237
00:09:05,083 --> 00:09:07,375
Okay, so you're stronger.
238
00:09:07,458 --> 00:09:10,417
In Asgard, we show no mercy
to our enemies.
239
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:15,542
Prepare to go to Valhalla,
the hall of slain heroes!
240
00:09:16,208 --> 00:09:17,458
[grunts]
241
00:09:20,667 --> 00:09:21,875
[gasps]
242
00:09:24,959 --> 00:09:26,291
[spits]
243
00:09:30,375 --> 00:09:31,667
[screams]
244
00:09:33,834 --> 00:09:36,000
-Yaah!
-Huh?
245
00:09:39,667 --> 00:09:40,667
Aah!
246
00:09:40,750 --> 00:09:41,750
[gasps]
247
00:09:45,125 --> 00:09:46,333
Whoa!
248
00:09:47,083 --> 00:09:48,165
[screams]
249
00:09:54,125 --> 00:09:55,333
Well, I'll be.
250
00:09:55,417 --> 00:09:57,290
Your boy knocked Thor senseless.
251
00:09:57,375 --> 00:10:00,875
Huh? I did? I, uh, huh, guess I did.
252
00:10:00,959 --> 00:10:03,625
Ha-ha, kid! Great!
You really hit a groove.
253
00:10:03,709 --> 00:10:06,083
But I didn't teach you that
flying-kick move.
254
00:10:06,166 --> 00:10:08,458
I know. It just sort of happened.
255
00:10:08,542 --> 00:10:09,834
Well, who'd have thought?
256
00:10:09,917 --> 00:10:10,792
If I didn't know better,
257
00:10:10,875 --> 00:10:13,166
I'd think some trickster
pulled a fast one.
258
00:10:13,250 --> 00:10:16,083
But, since all the Gods promised
not to interfere,
259
00:10:16,166 --> 00:10:17,583
that's impossible.
260
00:10:17,667 --> 00:10:19,625
That's an excellent point. That's true.
261
00:10:19,709 --> 00:10:23,417
[groans]
262
00:10:23,709 --> 00:10:26,291
So, looks like you're
our Thunder God, Hercules.
263
00:10:30,625 --> 00:10:32,667
Here's Mjollnir-- Your mighty hammer--
264
00:10:32,750 --> 00:10:34,834
Your magic belt, and your iron gloves.
265
00:10:34,917 --> 00:10:35,834
Awesome!
266
00:10:36,208 --> 00:10:37,750
No!
267
00:10:37,834 --> 00:10:39,290
Please, Thor, indoor voice.
268
00:10:39,375 --> 00:10:42,000
But, father, all my life I've trained
269
00:10:42,083 --> 00:10:45,667
to wield the mighty hammer
Mjollnir as Thunder God!
270
00:10:45,917 --> 00:10:47,250
Fair's fair. Keys.
271
00:10:47,333 --> 00:10:50,040
Well, not the chariot! I customized it!
272
00:10:50,165 --> 00:10:51,834
Beautifully, son, but the Thunder God
273
00:10:51,917 --> 00:10:54,250
has to have something to drive
his thunder around in.
274
00:10:54,333 --> 00:10:55,583
Even the goats?
275
00:10:55,667 --> 00:10:56,500
Goats?
276
00:10:56,583 --> 00:10:58,165
Oh, I almost forgot. Divinity.
277
00:11:02,583 --> 00:11:04,500
There. You're a God. Good luck.
278
00:11:04,583 --> 00:11:07,291
Ha! Look! Phil! I'm a God!
279
00:11:07,375 --> 00:11:09,583
Herc, kid, to you I implore.
280
00:11:09,667 --> 00:11:12,583
Can you make it so's I don't
rhyme no more?
281
00:11:12,667 --> 00:11:14,625
Gladly, Philoctetes.
282
00:11:16,000 --> 00:11:18,041
-Ah. Thanks, kid.
-[cowbell rattles]
283
00:11:18,125 --> 00:11:21,875
Look, um, I got a funny feeling
about this whole God thing.
284
00:11:21,959 --> 00:11:23,834
Come on, Phil. I'm a God.
285
00:11:23,917 --> 00:11:25,709
[scoffs] What can go wrong?
286
00:11:25,792 --> 00:11:28,291
Oh, uh, no hard feelings, right, Thor?
287
00:11:28,375 --> 00:11:30,417
You will rue the day
288
00:11:30,500 --> 00:11:33,375
you met Loki, the trickster God
of Ragnarok!
289
00:11:33,458 --> 00:11:37,083
Uh! What is up with this Ragnarok
people keep talking about?
290
00:11:37,165 --> 00:11:39,875
The twilight of the Gods!
291
00:11:39,959 --> 00:11:41,709
The downfall of Asgard,
292
00:11:41,792 --> 00:11:46,208
long foretold by the weavers of fate,
The Norns!
293
00:11:46,290 --> 00:11:48,375
Hey, don't worry about Thor, my man.
294
00:11:48,458 --> 00:11:50,375
-He's B-list now.
-[Hercules] Oh, okay.
295
00:11:50,458 --> 00:11:52,165
Uh, well, thanks for everything, Loki.
296
00:11:52,250 --> 00:11:54,125
I, uh-- whoa!
297
00:11:54,208 --> 00:11:55,208
Bye-bye.
298
00:11:55,290 --> 00:11:58,250
Have a great first day as a God--
First and last.
299
00:12:02,709 --> 00:12:03,542
[Loki] Man, I'm telling you,
300
00:12:03,625 --> 00:12:06,834
this project is gonna be huge,
baby-- just huge!
301
00:12:07,458 --> 00:12:11,125
[chuckling]
I mean, Hercules attached to Ragnarok.
302
00:12:11,208 --> 00:12:14,291
I mean, have you ever seen a kid
so not ready for the bigs?
303
00:12:14,375 --> 00:12:18,875
It is comeback time for you,
Fenris, my little snowball baby.
304
00:12:18,959 --> 00:12:20,542
[laughs]
305
00:12:20,625 --> 00:12:24,542
[Phil] So, what's on your list of epic,
mythic, godly duties?
306
00:12:24,625 --> 00:12:26,208
Provide sunshine
307
00:12:26,291 --> 00:12:29,542
for Greenland girl's school
may day celebration.
308
00:12:29,625 --> 00:12:31,125
Greenland? Hmph.
309
00:12:31,208 --> 00:12:33,625
Well, at least it sounds warm.
310
00:12:33,709 --> 00:12:37,250
Brr! Brother, if this is Greenland,
311
00:12:37,333 --> 00:12:39,250
I wonder what Iceland is like.
312
00:12:40,583 --> 00:12:43,333
[sighs] Why do we call this
Iceland anyway?
313
00:12:43,417 --> 00:12:46,500
Well, it keeps the tourists away, baby.
top you off.
314
00:12:46,583 --> 00:12:47,709
[chuckles]
315
00:12:47,792 --> 00:12:48,875
[wind howling]
316
00:12:48,959 --> 00:12:50,583
It can't be as miserable as this!
317
00:12:51,290 --> 00:12:53,333
You're in charge of the weather,
Thunder God!
318
00:12:53,834 --> 00:12:55,250
Change it!
319
00:12:55,417 --> 00:12:58,792
Oh, uh, right. I guess I better
use the hammer.
320
00:12:58,875 --> 00:13:00,041
Whoa!
321
00:13:00,125 --> 00:13:01,583
It's kind of tough to handle!
322
00:13:04,834 --> 00:13:07,917
-Oww! Ow! Ow! Ow! That's hail!
-Whoops.
323
00:13:08,667 --> 00:13:10,917
No! No more hammer!
324
00:13:12,166 --> 00:13:13,417
[bleating]
325
00:13:15,291 --> 00:13:17,834
[Hercules and Phil scream]
326
00:13:20,291 --> 00:13:21,500
[crash]
327
00:13:24,834 --> 00:13:27,417
May I suggest, O mighty Hercules,
328
00:13:27,500 --> 00:13:29,834
that we get out of your mighty downpour?
329
00:13:31,375 --> 00:13:32,750
Hey, there's a cave up there.
330
00:13:36,000 --> 00:13:38,875
Huh. It looks just like the cave
of the fates back home.
331
00:13:40,083 --> 00:13:41,500
Hey, that's Atropos.
332
00:13:41,583 --> 00:13:43,125
Those are the fates.
333
00:13:43,583 --> 00:13:45,834
Shh! We are not the fates.
334
00:13:45,917 --> 00:13:47,250
You are, too.
335
00:13:47,834 --> 00:13:50,458
Hey, you're double dipping--
336
00:13:50,542 --> 00:13:52,792
Working two mythologies at once!
337
00:13:52,875 --> 00:13:54,667
No. No. No.
338
00:13:54,750 --> 00:13:59,375
Uh, we are the Norns,
Norse weavers of fate.
339
00:13:59,458 --> 00:14:00,583
Oh, yah, sure. You bet.
340
00:14:00,667 --> 00:14:02,667
Now, if you'll excuse me,
we're in a hurry.
341
00:14:02,750 --> 00:14:04,125
W-where you going?
342
00:14:04,208 --> 00:14:05,333
Iceland.
343
00:14:05,417 --> 00:14:07,333
It's beautiful this time of year.
344
00:14:07,834 --> 00:14:09,792
There's nothing for us here now,
345
00:14:09,875 --> 00:14:11,917
or won't be, thanks to you.
346
00:14:12,000 --> 00:14:13,125
Me? Why?
347
00:14:13,208 --> 00:14:15,375
Ragnarok has come.
348
00:14:15,917 --> 00:14:17,375
The Twilight of the Gods?
349
00:14:17,458 --> 00:14:19,458
Loki said not to worry about that.
350
00:14:19,542 --> 00:14:20,875
Well, he would.
351
00:14:20,959 --> 00:14:22,458
Loki is the traitor
352
00:14:22,542 --> 00:14:26,542
who brings about the final destruction
of Asgard.
353
00:14:26,625 --> 00:14:28,792
What? But he seemed like
such a nice guy.
354
00:14:28,875 --> 00:14:32,458
Why do you think he's called
the Trickster God, you big dummy.
355
00:14:32,542 --> 00:14:35,542
Oh. [gasps] Ohh!
356
00:14:36,083 --> 00:14:40,500
Even now, Loki begins to release
the giant wolf Fenris,
357
00:14:40,583 --> 00:14:44,667
whose liberation from
the ice caves of Niffleheim
358
00:14:44,750 --> 00:14:49,667
wakes the giants and signals
the coming of Ragnarok.
359
00:14:51,165 --> 00:14:53,583
Ragnarok, Niffleheim, Fenris--
360
00:14:53,667 --> 00:14:55,834
Anybody got a Norse-to-Greek dictionary?
361
00:14:55,917 --> 00:15:01,834
Only when Thor wields the mighty
hammer will Loki be defeated.
362
00:15:02,000 --> 00:15:04,625
Fear not, for I am your Thunder God.
363
00:15:04,709 --> 00:15:07,875
I shall wield the hammer
and save Asgard!
364
00:15:07,959 --> 00:15:09,125
Whoops!
365
00:15:15,709 --> 00:15:17,250
Yeah, that's nice.
366
00:15:17,333 --> 00:15:19,166
Come on, sister Fates.
367
00:15:20,542 --> 00:15:23,417
Ha ha! I mean, Norns.
368
00:15:23,542 --> 00:15:26,625
I'm tellin' ya, they're double dipping!
369
00:15:28,709 --> 00:15:29,917
There it is!
370
00:15:32,959 --> 00:15:34,040
[grunting]
371
00:15:34,709 --> 00:15:35,792
[bleating]
372
00:15:36,083 --> 00:15:38,208
Hey, my goats!
373
00:15:38,290 --> 00:15:39,333
Let 'em go!
374
00:15:39,417 --> 00:15:41,000
We gotta stop Loki!
375
00:15:42,875 --> 00:15:45,125
Soon, my little pet, you shall be free.
376
00:15:45,208 --> 00:15:47,542
Odin will fall, and I, Loki,
377
00:15:47,625 --> 00:15:50,917
shall have exclusivity as king
of the Norse Gods!
378
00:15:51,000 --> 00:15:53,625
Can you feel it, baby?
Daddy's coming home!
379
00:15:53,709 --> 00:15:55,667
Not so fast, trickster!
380
00:15:55,750 --> 00:15:57,709
The Norns told me of your treachery.
381
00:15:57,792 --> 00:16:00,542
I, the mighty Hercules,
shall put a stop to, uh--
382
00:16:00,625 --> 00:16:01,834
Ragnarok?
383
00:16:01,917 --> 00:16:03,917
Right. Ragnarok.
384
00:16:04,917 --> 00:16:05,917
No!
385
00:16:09,917 --> 00:16:11,125
[roaring]
386
00:16:14,917 --> 00:16:18,667
Thank you, O Thunder God, for
comfort in my time of need.
387
00:16:18,750 --> 00:16:19,667
[chuckles]
388
00:16:20,291 --> 00:16:21,625
[growling]
389
00:16:21,709 --> 00:16:22,917
Oops. [clears throat]
390
00:16:23,000 --> 00:16:25,000
[deep voice] I mean, oops.
391
00:16:28,458 --> 00:16:30,709
[roars]
392
00:16:30,792 --> 00:16:32,959
I'm not afraid of your big, bad wolf.
393
00:16:33,040 --> 00:16:34,792
I'm a God.
394
00:16:34,917 --> 00:16:36,709
[roars]
395
00:16:37,875 --> 00:16:40,458
Still not reading the runes on
the wall, are you, Hercy?
396
00:16:40,542 --> 00:16:42,125
You see, you taking Thor's job
397
00:16:42,208 --> 00:16:43,417
as part of my whole vision, brother.
398
00:16:43,500 --> 00:16:45,417
Without Thor, Ragnarok's a done deal.
399
00:16:45,500 --> 00:16:48,250
But-- but I defeated Thor in combat!
400
00:16:48,333 --> 00:16:50,500
Yeah, with a little help from
your friend the Trickster God.
401
00:16:50,583 --> 00:16:52,290
I'm the one who defeated Thor, brother.
402
00:16:52,375 --> 00:16:56,040
As I shall defeat you, Loki!
403
00:16:56,125 --> 00:16:58,875
[roars]
404
00:17:00,875 --> 00:17:04,125
Okay! I guess it's up to me.
405
00:17:04,208 --> 00:17:05,625
[Fenris roars]
406
00:17:08,709 --> 00:17:11,040
Giants, awake!
407
00:17:11,125 --> 00:17:13,458
It's time to Ragnarok 'n' roll!
408
00:17:13,541 --> 00:17:15,500
[echoing] It's showtime!
409
00:17:16,208 --> 00:17:17,834
[rumbling]
410
00:17:21,791 --> 00:17:22,959
[growling]
411
00:17:28,959 --> 00:17:31,417
Ragnarok!
412
00:17:31,500 --> 00:17:33,917
Ragnarok! Ragnarok!
413
00:17:34,000 --> 00:17:37,291
I love the enthusiasm, guys,
but Valhalla is that way.
414
00:17:37,375 --> 00:17:39,125
[grunting]
415
00:17:39,208 --> 00:17:42,959
[both] Ragnarok! Ragnarok!
416
00:17:43,041 --> 00:17:44,834
[sighs] Oh, Loki's right.
417
00:17:44,917 --> 00:17:46,500
I wasn't ready to be a God.
418
00:17:47,375 --> 00:17:49,166
-The hammer!
-[Hercules] Huh?
419
00:17:49,250 --> 00:17:52,750
Mjollnir will return to the hand
of the Thunder God.
420
00:17:52,834 --> 00:17:54,917
You need only will it to do so.
421
00:17:55,000 --> 00:17:56,834
Oh. Cool.
422
00:17:56,917 --> 00:17:58,417
[grunting]
423
00:17:58,500 --> 00:18:00,500
Mjollnir, here, boy!
424
00:18:01,875 --> 00:18:02,834
Oops!
425
00:18:06,083 --> 00:18:07,125
Oops!
426
00:18:09,917 --> 00:18:11,917
Oh, hey, oh, boy. Here comes Loki.
427
00:18:12,000 --> 00:18:14,625
That's Fenris and those are
the giants, there.
428
00:18:16,250 --> 00:18:17,959
Ragnarok! To arms!
429
00:18:18,709 --> 00:18:20,125
[trumpets]
430
00:18:20,208 --> 00:18:23,291
[men shouting]
431
00:18:24,041 --> 00:18:25,041
Let's see--
432
00:18:25,125 --> 00:18:27,709
"When Ragnarok comes, the wolf
Fenris shall swallow the sun."
433
00:18:27,792 --> 00:18:30,875
[chuckles] Who writes this
stuff, huh? I love it.
434
00:18:34,291 --> 00:18:35,291
[belches]
435
00:18:35,375 --> 00:18:38,291
Fenris has swallowed the sun.
436
00:18:38,375 --> 00:18:40,625
Ugh! This is a total disaster!
437
00:18:40,709 --> 00:18:43,166
Thor, maybe you should be the Thunder God.
438
00:18:43,250 --> 00:18:44,458
Impossible!
439
00:18:44,542 --> 00:18:47,166
Unless you were to give up your godhood.
440
00:18:47,250 --> 00:18:50,500
If it'll save Asgard,
it's the only heroic thing to do.
441
00:18:50,583 --> 00:18:56,250
I, Hercules, hereby surrender
my godly powers to Thor.
442
00:18:58,125 --> 00:19:00,166
[thunder crashes]
443
00:19:05,667 --> 00:19:07,583
[Thor laughs]
444
00:19:07,667 --> 00:19:11,000
Come to your master, mighty hammer!
445
00:19:12,792 --> 00:19:14,500
Fenris, let's ice this deal.
446
00:19:14,583 --> 00:19:17,542
[growling]
447
00:19:17,625 --> 00:19:19,166
[roars]
448
00:19:20,375 --> 00:19:22,583
Oh, that's a might nippy, there.
449
00:19:22,667 --> 00:19:24,083
Yah. Yah, it's nippy.
450
00:19:24,166 --> 00:19:26,500
Traitorous trickster!
451
00:19:27,000 --> 00:19:28,041
Thor?
452
00:19:28,125 --> 00:19:29,750
Tsk-tsk-- labels, labels.
453
00:19:29,834 --> 00:19:31,375
You think the good guys are winning?
454
00:19:31,458 --> 00:19:34,333
Oh, yeah. I mean, with Thor
in there, how can they lose?
455
00:19:39,166 --> 00:19:40,500
Now what?
456
00:19:40,583 --> 00:19:43,166
How should I know? I'm not a God.
457
00:19:43,250 --> 00:19:45,166
[man] But you are a hero, right?
458
00:19:45,250 --> 00:19:46,583
I mean, that's what your resume said.
459
00:19:46,667 --> 00:19:50,583
Yeah, but that's all I am--
Just a hero in training.
460
00:19:50,667 --> 00:19:53,000
I mean, I can't stop Ragnarok.
461
00:19:53,083 --> 00:19:55,083
Well, that's how Loki figured it.
462
00:19:55,166 --> 00:19:57,542
Me, I guess I don't see it that way.
463
00:19:57,625 --> 00:19:58,500
Really?
464
00:19:58,625 --> 00:20:02,375
Of course, the most important
question is how do you see it?
465
00:20:03,458 --> 00:20:05,041
Okay, I'm happy to provide everybody
466
00:20:05,125 --> 00:20:06,166
with a new organizational chart
467
00:20:06,250 --> 00:20:07,875
that will reflect the new power structure.
468
00:20:07,959 --> 00:20:10,333
There's me, and then there's
everybody else.
469
00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:12,875
[Phil] Sorry, hotshot. No can do.
470
00:20:12,959 --> 00:20:15,291
I'm afraid we've got creative
differences, here.
471
00:20:15,375 --> 00:20:16,583
Don't you think, Herc?
472
00:20:16,667 --> 00:20:18,417
Please, you are so out of your league.
473
00:20:18,500 --> 00:20:21,333
I know, I know,
it's the Thunder God's hammer.
474
00:20:21,417 --> 00:20:23,834
But, baby, consider me a stand-in!
475
00:20:24,667 --> 00:20:25,959
Whoa! Whoa!
476
00:20:26,041 --> 00:20:27,917
Whoo!
477
00:20:28,000 --> 00:20:30,125
Boffo, kid! You did it!
478
00:20:30,208 --> 00:20:32,000
[Fenris roars]
479
00:20:32,083 --> 00:20:33,083
Whoops.
480
00:20:33,166 --> 00:20:36,083
You know, we're kind of using that sun.
481
00:20:37,834 --> 00:20:39,166
[sizzling]
482
00:20:39,917 --> 00:20:41,750
[moaning]
483
00:20:42,583 --> 00:20:43,834
[crash]
484
00:20:43,917 --> 00:20:46,375
[growling]
485
00:20:46,875 --> 00:20:50,208
Giants. It had to be giants.
486
00:20:50,291 --> 00:20:52,417
Shake, battle, and roll, kid!
487
00:20:52,500 --> 00:20:54,083
I don't think so.
488
00:20:54,166 --> 00:20:55,458
Different kind of giant...
489
00:20:56,834 --> 00:20:58,709
Different kind of weapon.
490
00:21:00,834 --> 00:21:02,792
[moaning]
491
00:21:20,125 --> 00:21:21,625
[cheering]
492
00:21:24,375 --> 00:21:25,959
Yaah!
493
00:21:28,834 --> 00:21:30,750
Well, now, Loki, the trickster,
494
00:21:30,834 --> 00:21:32,500
vanquished by some southern kid.
495
00:21:32,583 --> 00:21:34,834
Yah [chuckles] that's not too
bad a deal, there.
496
00:21:34,917 --> 00:21:37,709
Wait a minute, wait a minute.
There was a whole kind of prophecy deal
497
00:21:37,792 --> 00:21:39,291
that, like, sort of, was destined,
498
00:21:39,375 --> 00:21:41,417
and now that's just forgotten,
is that what's happening?
499
00:21:41,500 --> 00:21:42,542
Yeah, right.
500
00:21:42,625 --> 00:21:44,667
The Norns said Thor had to wield
the hammer.
501
00:21:44,750 --> 00:21:46,375
Thor did wield the hammer,
502
00:21:46,458 --> 00:21:49,458
but the prophecy never said
he had to hit anything with it.
503
00:21:49,542 --> 00:21:51,583
Turns out that was a job for Hercules.
504
00:21:51,667 --> 00:21:55,208
And, thanks to Loki, the kid was here
to play his part.
505
00:21:55,291 --> 00:21:57,583
Yeah, well, happy to help.
506
00:21:57,834 --> 00:21:59,875
So, uh, how about a ride home?
507
00:21:59,959 --> 00:22:02,959
Why don't you stay? Join us!
508
00:22:03,041 --> 00:22:04,875
Uh, well, no offense,
509
00:22:04,959 --> 00:22:06,959
but I think I'd rather go back to Greece.
510
00:22:07,041 --> 00:22:10,458
Why? What does Greece have
that Asgard doesn't?
511
00:22:10,542 --> 00:22:13,208
[shivers] Two words--
512
00:22:13,291 --> 00:22:15,250
[Hercules] Mediterranean climate.
513
00:22:21,041 --> 00:22:24,083
[theme music playing]
36686
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