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♪ Who put the "glad" in gladiator? ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
3
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♪ Whose daring deeds are great theater? ♪
4
00:00:14,625 --> 00:00:16,250
♪ Hercules ♪
5
00:00:16,332 --> 00:00:17,542
♪ Is he bold? ♪
6
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♪ No one braver ♪
7
00:00:18,542 --> 00:00:19,667
♪ Is he sweet? ♪
8
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♪ Our favorite flavor, Hercules ♪
9
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-♪ What a guy ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
10
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-♪ Ask his friends ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
11
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♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
12
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-♪ Hercules ♪-♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
13
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♪ Hercules ♪
14
00:00:30,500 --> 00:00:31,875
♪ Hercules ♪
15
00:00:31,959 --> 00:00:33,542
-♪ Come on ♪-♪ No one's fool ♪
16
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♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
17
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♪ He's in trainin' ♪
18
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♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
19
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
20
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♪ No complainin' ♪
21
00:00:40,709 --> 00:00:41,667
♪ He was a no one ♪
22
00:00:41,750 --> 00:00:43,500
♪ Zero, zero, give him a quick deed ♪
23
00:00:43,583 --> 00:00:44,709
♪ He's our hero ♪
24
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♪ He's the most likely to succeed ♪
25
00:00:48,333 --> 00:00:49,291
♪ From zero to hero ♪
26
00:00:50,208 --> 00:00:51,667
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
27
00:00:52,625 --> 00:00:57,417
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
28
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Wait and see!
29
00:01:01,667 --> 00:01:03,875
[Bob reading]
30
00:01:07,208 --> 00:01:09,458
Hang onto your flame, boss.
31
00:01:09,542 --> 00:01:11,750
You are in for a big surprise.
32
00:01:13,000 --> 00:01:14,500
Welcome to the Underworld
33
00:01:14,583 --> 00:01:16,667
Research and Development department.
34
00:01:16,750 --> 00:01:18,333
[speaking French] Après vous.
35
00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:23,583
Mm-hmm.
36
00:01:23,667 --> 00:01:26,166
[in English]
So why wasn't I told about this place?
37
00:01:26,250 --> 00:01:27,917
Plausible deniability, sir.
38
00:01:28,000 --> 00:01:30,375
Ta-da! What we have here
39
00:01:30,458 --> 00:01:34,208
will blow the lid
off the whole god squad.
40
00:01:34,291 --> 00:01:35,959
A box. Pandora's?
41
00:01:38,583 --> 00:01:40,000
Ba-da-bing.
42
00:01:40,083 --> 00:01:42,291
And... what?
43
00:01:49,125 --> 00:01:50,834
[Hades] Uh-huh. Uh-huh. Mm-hmm.
44
00:01:50,917 --> 00:01:52,041
It's a...
45
00:01:52,125 --> 00:01:53,959
well, it's a...
46
00:01:54,041 --> 00:01:54,875
Rock!
47
00:01:54,959 --> 00:01:57,542
You dragged me into your secret lab
48
00:01:57,625 --> 00:01:59,417
to look at a lump.
49
00:01:59,500 --> 00:02:00,542
Check it out!
50
00:02:06,125 --> 00:02:07,917
Oy. Uh...
51
00:02:08,000 --> 00:02:09,417
Hello. What's goin' on?
52
00:02:09,500 --> 00:02:12,083
I didn't order decaf.
What happened? Hello!
53
00:02:14,834 --> 00:02:16,834
OK. That got my attention.
54
00:02:16,917 --> 00:02:18,458
I'm down but I'm up. Ba-da-bing.
55
00:02:18,542 --> 00:02:19,834
You know what I mean? What is it?
56
00:02:19,917 --> 00:02:21,875
[both] The Kronos Stone!
57
00:02:22,583 --> 00:02:26,083
♪ Back when kronos wasKing of the universe ♪
58
00:02:26,166 --> 00:02:28,333
♪ He hocked up a rockAnd gave it a curse ♪
59
00:02:28,417 --> 00:02:31,250
♪ And now any godThat gives it a peek ♪
60
00:02:31,333 --> 00:02:34,333
♪ Slips into a permanentBeauty sleep ♪
61
00:02:34,417 --> 00:02:36,959
♪ Yeah, they drift awayTo the great unknown ♪
62
00:02:37,041 --> 00:02:40,250
♪ When they take a little peekyAt the Kronos Stone ♪
63
00:02:40,333 --> 00:02:41,417
♪ Don't need to count no sheep there ♪
64
00:02:41,500 --> 00:02:42,750
♪ It's a sleepy zone ♪
65
00:02:42,834 --> 00:02:44,667
♪ When you sneak a little peekyAt the Kronos Stone ♪
66
00:02:44,750 --> 00:02:45,959
That's fine. Good.
67
00:02:46,041 --> 00:02:48,417
♪ You feel a little freakyBy the Kronos Stone ♪
68
00:02:48,500 --> 00:02:51,875
♪ Are your knees a little weakyRound the Kronos Stone? ♪
69
00:02:51,959 --> 00:02:52,875
I got it!
70
00:02:52,959 --> 00:02:54,542
Enough with the song and dance.
71
00:02:54,625 --> 00:02:56,083
Thank you. Very nice.
72
00:02:56,166 --> 00:02:58,375
Not sure how to use it, exactly,
73
00:02:58,458 --> 00:02:59,375
but it's got potential.
74
00:02:59,458 --> 00:03:01,792
Yes, OK, good. Boys, boys...
75
00:03:01,875 --> 00:03:03,458
You're gonna find
a little something extra
76
00:03:03,542 --> 00:03:04,917
in your paycheck this week.
77
00:03:05,000 --> 00:03:06,667
-Hoo-hoo!
-Yeah!
78
00:03:06,750 --> 00:03:10,000
Uh, have you ever gotten a paycheck?
79
00:03:10,083 --> 00:03:12,291
I think I'm on direct deposit.
80
00:03:12,583 --> 00:03:16,583
Next up, Artemis, our beloved goddess
of the wild things,
81
00:03:16,667 --> 00:03:19,166
proposes that we restrict
temple offerings
82
00:03:19,250 --> 00:03:20,917
to fruits and vegetables.
83
00:03:21,000 --> 00:03:22,959
Hey, she could do whatever she wants
84
00:03:23,041 --> 00:03:24,750
in the temple of touchy-feely,
85
00:03:24,834 --> 00:03:26,959
but I'm stickin' with chop
and rump roast.
86
00:03:27,041 --> 00:03:29,917
Can't fight a war
on celery sticks and tofu.
87
00:03:30,000 --> 00:03:31,458
[Zeus] We'll come back to that one.
88
00:03:31,542 --> 00:03:34,375
Hermes, anything left on the agenda?
89
00:03:34,458 --> 00:03:35,917
Uh, just a kinky little thing
90
00:03:36,000 --> 00:03:38,000
called the festival of Mnemosyne,
91
00:03:38,083 --> 00:03:40,291
AKA the Mnemmys?
92
00:03:40,375 --> 00:03:42,917
Oh, not another festival.
93
00:03:43,000 --> 00:03:45,291
I'm getting tribute fatigue.
94
00:03:45,375 --> 00:03:47,500
Uh, FYI, your supremeness,
95
00:03:47,583 --> 00:03:52,667
it's a drama festival dedicated
to Mnemosyne, the mother of the muses.
96
00:03:52,750 --> 00:03:54,250
A drama festival?
97
00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:56,291
Ho ho! Why didn't you say so?
98
00:03:56,417 --> 00:04:02,417
These plays honor a certain group of
immortal cats we all know.
99
00:04:02,583 --> 00:04:03,500
[Hades] Lemme see that!
100
00:04:04,000 --> 00:04:05,000
Uh...
101
00:04:05,083 --> 00:04:06,750
[mumbles]
102
00:04:06,834 --> 00:04:08,500
Yeah, right. Well, good.
That's right.
103
00:04:08,583 --> 00:04:11,000
Every god except for the one who's got
a real story to tell,
104
00:04:11,083 --> 00:04:13,917
Namely-- hello! Yours truly. Hello!
105
00:04:14,000 --> 00:04:16,125
Hah! A play about you, Hades?
106
00:04:16,207 --> 00:04:18,041
Oh, that's rich! Ha!
107
00:04:18,125 --> 00:04:21,792
Ha ha. I fail to see the humor.
108
00:04:21,875 --> 00:04:23,667
Come on, now, little brother.
109
00:04:23,750 --> 00:04:28,000
We all know the lord of the underworld
Is not exactly Mr. Popularity.
110
00:04:28,082 --> 00:04:30,000
No offense.
111
00:04:30,082 --> 00:04:32,041
None taken. Ho ho ho.
112
00:04:32,125 --> 00:04:33,457
Son of Kronos.
113
00:04:33,542 --> 00:04:37,291
So, Hermes, who's putting on
this little extravaganza?
114
00:04:37,375 --> 00:04:38,709
The Athenians?
115
00:04:38,792 --> 00:04:41,625
Eggheads! All talk, no action.
116
00:04:41,709 --> 00:04:44,125
Actually, home base
for our supertroopers
117
00:04:44,207 --> 00:04:46,875
is the Prometheus Academy.
118
00:04:46,959 --> 00:04:49,375
A school play? Snore!
119
00:04:49,457 --> 00:04:54,792
[Zeus] It just so happens
my boy goes to pro-ac!
120
00:04:54,875 --> 00:04:56,875
I'll bet he's the star!
121
00:04:56,959 --> 00:04:57,834
Right you are, sir.
122
00:04:57,917 --> 00:05:01,917
The New Zeus Revue starring Hercules.
123
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:05,417
And I think we have a clip.
124
00:05:05,500 --> 00:05:06,709
Dynamite! Hah!
125
00:05:06,792 --> 00:05:07,667
Roll it.
126
00:05:09,166 --> 00:05:12,375
[Hercules] I am sure it's of no use...
127
00:05:12,458 --> 00:05:15,333
To incur the wrath of Zeus.
128
00:05:15,417 --> 00:05:19,500
As I-- as I am just and I am fair...
129
00:05:19,582 --> 00:05:22,082
Evildoers must beware.
130
00:05:22,166 --> 00:05:24,959
[Hercules] If I find your ho--
your homage lacking...
131
00:05:25,041 --> 00:05:28,417
[chorus] You're sure to get
a monstro whacking.
132
00:05:28,500 --> 00:05:32,332
So do pay heed before too long.
133
00:05:32,417 --> 00:05:34,917
Six million Greeks can't all be wrong.
134
00:05:36,667 --> 00:05:39,542
Yes. Well, well, you know...
135
00:05:39,625 --> 00:05:41,417
Fantastic!
136
00:05:41,500 --> 00:05:42,457
Unbelievable!
137
00:05:42,542 --> 00:05:44,417
Bro, look, that's just a rehearsal.
138
00:05:44,500 --> 00:05:47,457
You gotta factor in lights,
music, costumes!
139
00:05:47,542 --> 00:05:50,917
I smell it! I smell... A smasharoo!
140
00:05:51,000 --> 00:05:52,582
Really? You think?
141
00:05:52,667 --> 00:05:53,792
Trust me.
142
00:05:53,875 --> 00:05:56,625
The critics thumbs will be, like,
stuck up!
143
00:05:56,709 --> 00:05:59,125
We're talkin' must-see Hercules.
144
00:05:59,207 --> 00:06:01,667
No god would dare miss it.
Am I right?
145
00:06:01,750 --> 00:06:04,458
Outstanding! Hah!
146
00:06:04,542 --> 00:06:08,125
So, I will see you all there?
147
00:06:08,208 --> 00:06:09,458
-Uh, yeah.
-Yeah, yeah.
148
00:06:09,542 --> 00:06:11,458
Uh, sure, sure. We'll be there.
149
00:06:11,542 --> 00:06:12,458
Yeah.
150
00:06:12,542 --> 00:06:13,458
Sure, mm-hmm.
151
00:06:13,542 --> 00:06:14,458
Looking forward to it.
152
00:06:14,542 --> 00:06:16,291
Yeah. Looking forward to it.
153
00:06:16,375 --> 00:06:19,207
Sold out! S.R.O.!
154
00:06:19,291 --> 00:06:21,000
Perfect.
155
00:06:24,834 --> 00:06:28,125
Yeah! Lovely rehearsal, Hercules,
156
00:06:28,207 --> 00:06:29,667
in a grueling, amateur way.
157
00:06:29,750 --> 00:06:32,959
Now, let's see now.
Next is, uh, Icarus,
158
00:06:33,041 --> 00:06:34,457
Perennial Also-ran.
159
00:06:34,542 --> 00:06:36,457
[Icarus] Ha! OK! All right.
160
00:06:36,542 --> 00:06:39,000
Sure, I've entered the Mnemmys
every year since I was five,
161
00:06:39,082 --> 00:06:40,250
Mr. Parentheses.
162
00:06:40,332 --> 00:06:42,000
Sure, I've lost every time,
163
00:06:42,082 --> 00:06:44,500
and sure, a lesser man
might lose hope,
164
00:06:44,582 --> 00:06:47,500
but like the great flaming phoenix,
165
00:06:47,582 --> 00:06:50,500
I will rise! OK.
166
00:06:50,582 --> 00:06:52,041
Very, very inspiring...
167
00:06:52,125 --> 00:06:54,125
to someone somewhere, no doubt.
168
00:06:56,625 --> 00:06:58,291
So what play are you gonna do?
169
00:06:58,375 --> 00:06:59,332
Still conceptualizing.
170
00:06:59,417 --> 00:07:01,458
Icarus, you're running out of time.
171
00:07:01,542 --> 00:07:03,291
Well, I'm working it out.
Gonna be good.
172
00:07:03,375 --> 00:07:06,458
OK, well, good luck.
173
00:07:06,542 --> 00:07:07,959
Don't need it.
174
00:07:08,041 --> 00:07:10,083
Don't worry about me, buddy.
175
00:07:10,166 --> 00:07:14,375
Ohh! Muses of the arts,
176
00:07:14,458 --> 00:07:19,041
I, oh, so humbly turn
to you for inspiration.
177
00:07:19,125 --> 00:07:20,166
Please...
178
00:07:20,250 --> 00:07:23,457
Please guide me to a play
that'll win me the Mnemmy!
179
00:07:23,542 --> 00:07:25,457
I'd be really grateful!
180
00:07:25,542 --> 00:07:27,834
Really, really-- aah!
181
00:07:30,041 --> 00:07:30,959
Whoa.
182
00:07:31,041 --> 00:07:33,000
You're not a muse.
183
00:07:33,082 --> 00:07:34,457
Name's Hades, lord of the dead,
184
00:07:34,542 --> 00:07:35,582
and I'm here to help.
185
00:07:35,667 --> 00:07:38,959
Hades? Oh, well, that's just great!
186
00:07:39,041 --> 00:07:41,667
Oh, fate is a cruel jester.
187
00:07:41,750 --> 00:07:44,207
Now on the verge
of my greatest triumph,
188
00:07:44,291 --> 00:07:49,207
you have come to shuffle me off
this mortal coil.
189
00:07:49,291 --> 00:07:50,291
Help, you say?
190
00:07:50,375 --> 00:07:53,417
Look, [clears throat]
you need to play a god.
191
00:07:53,500 --> 00:07:55,582
I wanna have my story told.
192
00:07:55,667 --> 00:07:57,834
It's a match made in...
Well, you know.
193
00:07:57,917 --> 00:08:03,458
Yeah. Well, it's just that nobody's
really ever done a play about you.
194
00:08:03,542 --> 00:08:06,834
I mean, you're not exactly
Mr. Popularity.
195
00:08:06,917 --> 00:08:08,458
Oversharing. Ha ha ha.
196
00:08:08,542 --> 00:08:09,959
Yeah, I know. My ears
are always burning.
197
00:08:10,041 --> 00:08:11,959
But, hey, the point is,
198
00:08:12,041 --> 00:08:13,166
it's the rule breakers,
199
00:08:13,250 --> 00:08:15,959
it's the avant garde, if you will,
200
00:08:16,041 --> 00:08:17,582
who always win those awards.
201
00:08:17,667 --> 00:08:20,667
Hmm. Well,
villains are the juiciest roles.
202
00:08:20,750 --> 00:08:21,917
But I'm an actor.
203
00:08:22,000 --> 00:08:23,750
I will need to get inside your head,
204
00:08:23,834 --> 00:08:26,709
learn what you're about,
how you feel, what you eat.
205
00:08:26,792 --> 00:08:29,375
I mean, I'm talking
total access here, buddy.
206
00:08:29,457 --> 00:08:33,165
Hey, my afterlife's an open book,
you know what I mean?
207
00:08:33,250 --> 00:08:35,082
Come on, let's blow this peanut stand.
What do you say?
208
00:08:37,542 --> 00:08:42,125
He distinctly said, "Good job, guys."
209
00:08:42,207 --> 00:08:43,207
Yeah.
210
00:08:43,290 --> 00:08:44,500
[whimpers]
211
00:08:44,709 --> 00:08:46,375
Like he cares.
212
00:08:47,125 --> 00:08:49,959
Welcome back, boss! Oh...
213
00:08:50,040 --> 00:08:53,542
We just kept right on
doing our good job
214
00:08:53,625 --> 00:08:56,709
while you were gone, sir.
215
00:08:56,792 --> 00:09:00,959
So when do we get to use
the you know what on-- Oww!
216
00:09:01,041 --> 00:09:01,959
[Hades] Pain?
217
00:09:02,041 --> 00:09:03,208
A little.
218
00:09:03,291 --> 00:09:04,917
Say hello to our guest.
219
00:09:05,000 --> 00:09:06,041
Hiya!
220
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:10,166
He doesn't look very,
uh, um, you know.
221
00:09:10,250 --> 00:09:11,333
Deceased.
222
00:09:11,417 --> 00:09:14,083
Far from it, boys. Far from it!
223
00:09:14,166 --> 00:09:16,792
This promising young thespian
is Icarus.
224
00:09:16,875 --> 00:09:18,375
At the drama festival,
225
00:09:18,458 --> 00:09:20,959
he'll be playing the role of-- ha ha.
226
00:09:21,041 --> 00:09:23,458
Ahem... me.
227
00:09:23,542 --> 00:09:25,250
That's right. Ick's my name,
schtick's, my game.
228
00:09:25,333 --> 00:09:26,500
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom.
229
00:09:26,583 --> 00:09:28,500
Ooh! How was that, huh?
Suitably sleazy?
230
00:09:28,583 --> 00:09:31,166
Hey, little acorn, you're gonna be
a heck of an oak!
231
00:09:31,250 --> 00:09:34,083
Oh, mama, I can taste my Mnemmy!
232
00:09:34,165 --> 00:09:35,500
So what are we waiting for?
233
00:09:35,583 --> 00:09:38,750
Time to make you a star!
234
00:09:45,750 --> 00:09:46,834
Aarrgh!
235
00:09:46,917 --> 00:09:47,959
Now, see, when you're
roasting minions,
236
00:09:48,040 --> 00:09:48,917
you gotta really lose yourself.
237
00:09:49,000 --> 00:09:50,542
Your arms extended, head thrown back,
238
00:09:50,625 --> 00:09:51,959
a lot of booga booga, you know?
239
00:09:52,040 --> 00:09:53,750
Then you just flame on.
Watch this. They love this.
240
00:09:53,834 --> 00:09:55,792
Like so. OK, ready?
241
00:09:55,875 --> 00:09:56,959
Aaarrgh!
242
00:09:58,417 --> 00:10:00,000
OK, boom, poof! Here's the deal.
243
00:10:00,083 --> 00:10:01,333
The underworld's the pits, right?
244
00:10:01,417 --> 00:10:03,000
But I'm like up the river styx
without a paddle,
245
00:10:03,083 --> 00:10:03,917
You know what I'm sayin'?
246
00:10:04,000 --> 00:10:05,542
I mean, give me a flamin' break!
247
00:10:05,625 --> 00:10:07,709
Dead souls check in,
but they don't check out.
248
00:10:07,792 --> 00:10:09,458
I got the concept!
249
00:10:11,959 --> 00:10:14,458
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom,
ba-da-bing, ba-da-bing!
250
00:10:14,542 --> 00:10:15,625
I'm still working on it.
251
00:10:15,709 --> 00:10:16,959
OK, good. Acting school's out.
252
00:10:17,041 --> 00:10:18,458
Take him back, boys.
253
00:10:18,542 --> 00:10:21,792
Ba-da-bing... what a--
Do I sound like that?
254
00:10:21,875 --> 00:10:22,917
[Pain] I don't get it.
255
00:10:23,000 --> 00:10:25,959
Yeah. What about all of our good work?
256
00:10:26,041 --> 00:10:27,417
Don't panic, Panic, OK?
257
00:10:27,500 --> 00:10:28,959
You can't just
walk up to Zeus and say,
258
00:10:29,041 --> 00:10:30,917
"Hey, here's the Kronos Stone.
259
00:10:31,000 --> 00:10:31,917
Take a big nap."
260
00:10:32,000 --> 00:10:32,917
You can't?
261
00:10:33,000 --> 00:10:34,125
Try to stay with me here.
262
00:10:34,208 --> 00:10:39,208
Because Zeus' precious little Jerkules
is in this drama festival,
263
00:10:39,290 --> 00:10:41,375
Hey, all the other gods
will be there, OK?
264
00:10:41,458 --> 00:10:42,625
OK.
265
00:10:42,709 --> 00:10:46,040
OK, so, actors
wear masks onstage, huh?
266
00:10:46,125 --> 00:10:48,165
Yeah, uh-huh.
267
00:10:48,250 --> 00:10:49,750
You see where I'm going
with this, right?
268
00:10:49,834 --> 00:10:51,083
[both] Yeah!
269
00:10:51,165 --> 00:10:52,083
[both] No.
270
00:10:52,165 --> 00:10:54,083
No. OK, fine. Oy.
271
00:10:54,165 --> 00:10:57,583
Look, you carve the stone into a mask.
272
00:10:57,667 --> 00:11:02,458
That pain in my flame kid
wears the mask onstage.
273
00:11:02,542 --> 00:11:03,959
As my play unfolds,
274
00:11:04,041 --> 00:11:06,458
all the gods go sleepy-bye!
275
00:11:06,542 --> 00:11:07,458
[snore]
276
00:11:07,542 --> 00:11:08,417
OK? You got it?
277
00:11:08,500 --> 00:11:09,917
-Yeah!
-Oh, yes!
278
00:11:10,000 --> 00:11:11,417
-Bravo!
-Nice plan!
279
00:11:11,500 --> 00:11:12,417
Love it!
280
00:11:12,500 --> 00:11:13,458
Hey, see?
281
00:11:13,542 --> 00:11:16,709
By the time the reviews are in,
I'll be movin' on up!
282
00:11:16,792 --> 00:11:19,792
Huh! Finally gettin'
my piece of the sky.
283
00:11:25,083 --> 00:11:27,333
[Cassandra] Isn't today lima beans?
284
00:11:27,417 --> 00:11:31,667
All vegetables were
offered to the gods this morning.
285
00:11:31,750 --> 00:11:33,040
Mutton loaf?
286
00:11:33,125 --> 00:11:35,875
Yeah. Um, thanks just the same.
287
00:11:35,959 --> 00:11:37,875
Hey, um, cassandra,
288
00:11:37,959 --> 00:11:39,875
Have you noticed anything different
about Icarus?
289
00:11:39,959 --> 00:11:42,040
A comprehensive list could take weeks.
290
00:11:42,125 --> 00:11:43,542
Sweetheart, you look fantabulous.
291
00:11:43,625 --> 00:11:44,959
What are you, some kind
of cheerleader?
292
00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:46,792
Nice. Name's Icarus, lord of the--
293
00:11:46,875 --> 00:11:48,290
Well, nothing currently,
294
00:11:48,375 --> 00:11:50,542
But I'm in a training program.
295
00:11:52,125 --> 00:11:54,917
Hmm. I honor you
with my august presence,
296
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:57,333
and you give me mutton loaf?
297
00:11:57,417 --> 00:11:59,959
Memo to me, pox on all
food service workers.
298
00:12:00,041 --> 00:12:02,917
No, I mean, something
more different than usual.
299
00:12:03,000 --> 00:12:05,542
Baby doll! How'd you like to flirt
with danger, huh?
300
00:12:05,625 --> 00:12:08,375
I have been a very bad boy.
301
00:12:08,458 --> 00:12:09,625
Eww!
302
00:12:09,709 --> 00:12:10,834
See what I mean?
303
00:12:10,917 --> 00:12:13,125
And I thought he was creepy before.
304
00:12:16,583 --> 00:12:20,041
Remember, it not only
has to look like Hades,
305
00:12:20,125 --> 00:12:22,000
It's gotta capture
the, the, the, the...
306
00:12:22,083 --> 00:12:24,000
The inner essence of Hades.
307
00:12:24,083 --> 00:12:26,625
What do you think, huh?
308
00:12:27,166 --> 00:12:28,917
Hmm...
309
00:12:31,458 --> 00:12:32,917
Keep chiseling.
310
00:12:34,040 --> 00:12:36,000
Icarus, I'm worried about you.
311
00:12:36,083 --> 00:12:38,583
I mean, I know you're doing Hades
in the play and all,
312
00:12:38,667 --> 00:12:39,792
But you don't have to be like him...
313
00:12:39,875 --> 00:12:43,332
24/7? It's called acting, Jerkules.
314
00:12:43,333 --> 00:12:46,208
That's what I mean.
You never called me "Jerkules" before.
315
00:12:46,290 --> 00:12:47,834
Oh, I'm sorry, boo-boo.
316
00:12:47,917 --> 00:12:49,165
No, that's not me talking.
317
00:12:49,250 --> 00:12:50,875
That's my character.
318
00:12:50,959 --> 00:12:53,250
Yeah, well, your character's
gonna get socked in the jaw.
319
00:12:53,333 --> 00:12:56,959
Hey, hey, can I help it
if my mimicry skills are dead on?
320
00:12:57,040 --> 00:13:00,250
Or undead, as the case may be, huh?
321
00:13:01,125 --> 00:13:02,208
Hey, wait a minute.
322
00:13:02,291 --> 00:13:04,333
How are you mimicking Hades?
323
00:13:04,417 --> 00:13:08,166
I infer. I imagine. I speculate.
324
00:13:08,250 --> 00:13:09,667
Oh, plus, he's had me down
325
00:13:09,750 --> 00:13:11,583
to the big basement
to watch him in action.
326
00:13:11,667 --> 00:13:13,959
What? Icarus,
we're talking about Hades!
327
00:13:14,041 --> 00:13:15,250
He's evil!
328
00:13:15,333 --> 00:13:16,625
Actors don't judge.
329
00:13:16,709 --> 00:13:19,625
We observe. We internalize.
We emote.
330
00:13:19,709 --> 00:13:21,375
Then I guess I'm no actor.
331
00:13:21,458 --> 00:13:24,875
Well, your previews
have been a little tepid.
332
00:13:24,959 --> 00:13:27,500
Ah... Hades must be up to something.
333
00:13:27,583 --> 00:13:28,875
Wait a minute!
334
00:13:29,291 --> 00:13:30,792
You're playing Zeus, right?
335
00:13:30,875 --> 00:13:31,917
Yeah, so?
336
00:13:32,000 --> 00:13:33,000
Whoa! I get it!
337
00:13:33,083 --> 00:13:35,000
Oh, you're tricky! You're tricky, man!
338
00:13:35,083 --> 00:13:36,625
You're getting into character, right?
339
00:13:36,709 --> 00:13:38,750
Zeus always wants Hades to lose, huh?
340
00:13:38,834 --> 00:13:39,959
Good job!
341
00:13:40,040 --> 00:13:41,500
We'll make an actor out of you yet.
342
00:13:41,583 --> 00:13:43,208
Icarus, wait. I'm not acting.
343
00:13:43,290 --> 00:13:44,959
I think something's wrong.
344
00:13:45,040 --> 00:13:46,040
Sure thing, Zeus.
345
00:13:46,125 --> 00:13:47,000
Now if you'll excuse me,
346
00:13:47,083 --> 00:13:48,417
I got business in the underworld.
347
00:13:48,500 --> 00:13:50,542
Boom! Later, big bro.
348
00:13:50,625 --> 00:13:52,000
Ahhh!
349
00:13:53,500 --> 00:13:55,208
Ah, the kid with the sunstroke
350
00:13:55,290 --> 00:13:57,250
is playing the role perfectly!
351
00:13:57,333 --> 00:13:59,959
Ah. He's gonna slay 'em
on opening night.
352
00:14:00,041 --> 00:14:01,458
Ooh! Nice!
353
00:14:01,542 --> 00:14:03,375
You boys are on a roll.
354
00:14:03,875 --> 00:14:06,041
Aw, thanks, boss.
355
00:14:06,125 --> 00:14:09,083
Time to see this puppy in action.
356
00:14:10,500 --> 00:14:13,250
[man] Nectar here! Get your nectar!
357
00:14:13,333 --> 00:14:15,208
Who's ready? Nectar!
358
00:14:15,291 --> 00:14:17,041
Things go better with nectar!
359
00:14:17,125 --> 00:14:19,041
Get your ice-cold nectar!
360
00:14:19,125 --> 00:14:20,375
[Ares] Yo, nectar!
361
00:14:20,458 --> 00:14:21,750
Pass it on up!
362
00:14:21,834 --> 00:14:23,041
[Hermes] 'Scuse me, folks.
363
00:14:23,125 --> 00:14:24,291
Supreme beings coming through.
364
00:14:24,375 --> 00:14:25,625
'Scuse me. Pardon me.
365
00:14:25,709 --> 00:14:27,792
Enjoy the show, folks.
366
00:14:27,875 --> 00:14:29,792
Thank you, Hermes.
367
00:14:29,875 --> 00:14:31,458
Hey, where's Hades?
368
00:14:31,542 --> 00:14:33,917
I thought we all had to be here.
369
00:14:34,040 --> 00:14:36,792
Aw, that big baby's
probably still upset
370
00:14:36,875 --> 00:14:38,834
that nobody's doing his story.
371
00:14:40,250 --> 00:14:43,500
You know, sometimes things look better
from the cheap seats
372
00:14:43,583 --> 00:14:45,959
Way, way up here.
373
00:14:46,040 --> 00:14:48,417
Adonis, you're an 11-time
Mnemmy award winner.
374
00:14:48,500 --> 00:14:49,834
How does it feel?
375
00:14:49,917 --> 00:14:52,040
Of course it's an honor
just to be nominated,
376
00:14:52,125 --> 00:14:53,542
But as you know, Homer,
377
00:14:53,625 --> 00:14:56,040
with me, it's always about the work.
378
00:14:56,125 --> 00:14:58,500
Any recognition I get is just gravy.
379
00:14:58,583 --> 00:15:00,625
But I do like gravy.
380
00:15:00,709 --> 00:15:02,500
Please! Please, everyone!
Settle down!
381
00:15:02,583 --> 00:15:04,291
I'll do the panicking,
thank you.
382
00:15:04,375 --> 00:15:05,917
Now, where is that Icarus?
383
00:15:06,000 --> 00:15:07,208
He's the opening act.
384
00:15:07,291 --> 00:15:11,250
Wh-where's Hades? I mean,
he's gonna be here, right?
385
00:15:11,333 --> 00:15:13,834
He'd love to,
but you know how he is.
386
00:15:13,917 --> 00:15:16,500
The lord of the dead's
work is never done,
387
00:15:16,583 --> 00:15:20,166
but he sent this gift for good luck.
388
00:15:20,250 --> 00:15:22,959
Oh, man! I'm, like,
all choked up here.
389
00:15:23,041 --> 00:15:24,417
Hey, what's this made of?
390
00:15:24,542 --> 00:15:25,959
-[music plays]
-Funny you should ask.
391
00:15:26,041 --> 00:15:27,458
Uh-oh.
392
00:15:27,542 --> 00:15:29,917
We don't know.
393
00:15:30,041 --> 00:15:31,000
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom.
394
00:15:31,083 --> 00:15:32,500
Ladies and gentlemen,
395
00:15:32,583 --> 00:15:34,417
dwellers of the nether regions,
396
00:15:34,500 --> 00:15:36,290
Hades is in the house!
397
00:15:36,417 --> 00:15:37,583
How's my hair?
398
00:15:37,667 --> 00:15:39,333
Uh, we better go.
399
00:15:39,417 --> 00:15:41,290
Knock 'em dead.
400
00:15:41,375 --> 00:15:42,875
Figure of speech, of course.
401
00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:47,667
Yeah. Send 'em all into an eternal,
deathless slumber.
402
00:15:47,750 --> 00:15:50,040
More figures of speech.
403
00:15:50,125 --> 00:15:53,125
Ah, Icarus! You're due to go on!
404
00:15:53,208 --> 00:15:54,250
Sadly for us all.
405
00:15:54,375 --> 00:15:57,917
The kid's going on.
It won't be long now.
406
00:15:58,040 --> 00:16:00,959
Oh, I bet the view
from olympus is sweet.
407
00:16:01,041 --> 00:16:01,875
Oof!
408
00:16:01,959 --> 00:16:03,959
Ow! Hey!
409
00:16:04,041 --> 00:16:05,291
[both] Uh-oh.
410
00:16:05,375 --> 00:16:06,375
What are you two doing here?
411
00:16:06,500 --> 00:16:07,875
Just a couple of drama lovers.
412
00:16:07,959 --> 00:16:10,834
Yeah. The, uh, play's the thing?
413
00:16:14,834 --> 00:16:17,166
Good evening. Welcome, all,
414
00:16:17,250 --> 00:16:20,875
to the Prometheus Academy's
Festival of Mnemosyne,
415
00:16:21,041 --> 00:16:22,583
the mother of all muses.
416
00:16:22,667 --> 00:16:24,667
In honor of our distinguished,
417
00:16:24,750 --> 00:16:26,166
to understate wildly,
418
00:16:26,250 --> 00:16:27,667
Pantheon of guests--
419
00:16:27,750 --> 00:16:29,250
Please don't smite me--
420
00:16:29,333 --> 00:16:32,165
I make this humble offering.
421
00:16:32,290 --> 00:16:34,667
Ugh! Again with the broccoli?
422
00:16:34,750 --> 00:16:37,000
Yo, pal! Make mine mutton!
423
00:16:39,165 --> 00:16:42,625
Aw, is that an elbow or a knee?
424
00:16:42,709 --> 00:16:44,125
I don't wanna look.
425
00:16:44,208 --> 00:16:45,458
What are you up to?
426
00:16:45,542 --> 00:16:47,625
I'd tell ya, but I'd be...
427
00:16:47,709 --> 00:16:48,834
A lion.
428
00:16:48,959 --> 00:16:51,500
Grrrr!
429
00:16:57,583 --> 00:16:59,792
Grrr. Ah.
430
00:16:59,917 --> 00:17:03,834
Like stop fishing for info, Jerkules.
431
00:17:04,625 --> 00:17:06,750
[gasping]
432
00:17:06,834 --> 00:17:07,750
Huh?
433
00:17:08,290 --> 00:17:09,916
Stop badgering us.
434
00:17:13,458 --> 00:17:14,875
Oww!
435
00:17:15,791 --> 00:17:18,709
Grrr.
436
00:17:21,834 --> 00:17:22,959
Oww!
437
00:17:24,750 --> 00:17:25,959
-Aah!
-Aah!
438
00:17:26,083 --> 00:17:27,165
Oh, I'm sorry. Excuse me.
439
00:17:28,709 --> 00:17:31,041
[hissing]
440
00:17:31,166 --> 00:17:33,000
Rats! Good one.
441
00:17:33,125 --> 00:17:34,625
[knuckles crack]
442
00:17:35,208 --> 00:17:36,083
Icarus--
443
00:17:36,166 --> 00:17:39,625
Not now, Zeussy. I'm trying
to awaken my personal demon.
444
00:17:39,750 --> 00:17:43,875
I just saw Hades' personal demons,
and I'm not Zeus!
445
00:17:43,959 --> 00:17:45,291
Ah.
446
00:17:45,375 --> 00:17:46,291
Hey!
447
00:17:46,375 --> 00:17:47,250
My leg fell asleep.
448
00:17:47,333 --> 00:17:49,125
Well, you oughta get that
checked, bigsy.
449
00:17:49,208 --> 00:17:51,458
Now I have to get into character.
450
00:17:51,542 --> 00:17:54,750
Ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom, ba-da-bing,
ba-da-boom, ba-da-bing, ba-da-boom.
451
00:17:54,875 --> 00:17:58,583
I'd like to introduce our
first performer, Icarus...
452
00:17:58,709 --> 00:18:02,041
in his one-man show--
Remember, no smiting--
453
00:18:02,125 --> 00:18:04,750
Give him heck, Hades.
454
00:18:04,875 --> 00:18:07,000
Yes! Showtime!
455
00:18:07,125 --> 00:18:09,083
A play about Hades, ha.
456
00:18:09,166 --> 00:18:12,709
Leave it to that kid
who flew too close to the sun.
457
00:18:12,834 --> 00:18:17,125
To be evil, or not to be evil...
458
00:18:17,250 --> 00:18:20,625
that is the question.
459
00:18:20,750 --> 00:18:22,500
It's a no-brainer, evil, ba-da-bing.
460
00:18:22,625 --> 00:18:23,917
If I'm lying, I'm dying.
461
00:18:24,041 --> 00:18:25,417
Dying! Get it?
462
00:18:25,542 --> 00:18:27,875
-[snoring] Oh!
-[snoring] Oh! Hey! Hey! Hey!
463
00:18:27,959 --> 00:18:31,875
Kid's good. Just like
my little brother.
464
00:18:32,000 --> 00:18:34,208
Oy, this is worse than I expected,
465
00:18:34,333 --> 00:18:35,208
which was abysmal.
466
00:18:35,333 --> 00:18:36,667
He's putting the gods to sleep.
467
00:18:36,750 --> 00:18:38,792
OK, all right.
468
00:18:38,875 --> 00:18:41,333
Did you hear the one
about the three dead guys
469
00:18:41,417 --> 00:18:42,375
who won the lottery?
470
00:18:42,458 --> 00:18:44,500
Boy, were they lucky stiffs!
471
00:18:44,583 --> 00:18:46,000
Ha, stiffs!
472
00:18:46,083 --> 00:18:48,208
Deh, did you get it?
473
00:18:48,834 --> 00:18:49,917
No...
474
00:18:50,000 --> 00:18:55,291
Ah, yes, eyes closed,
breathing shallow.
475
00:18:55,417 --> 00:18:59,750
Yes! Eternal sleep, ho!
476
00:19:00,875 --> 00:19:03,083
Oh... Icarus isn't that boring.
477
00:19:03,208 --> 00:19:06,417
And why isn't his acting coach
in the gods' balcony?
478
00:19:07,583 --> 00:19:10,041
Cue, cue, get out there.
479
00:19:10,166 --> 00:19:12,458
And cue the lords
of the dancing waters.
480
00:19:12,583 --> 00:19:14,542
The gods are falling asleep,
481
00:19:14,625 --> 00:19:16,625
my leg fell asleep
when I got near him,
482
00:19:16,750 --> 00:19:18,792
must be because I'm part god.
483
00:19:19,875 --> 00:19:24,375
Ah, think. Think. What, did Pain
or Panic give him something?
484
00:19:29,000 --> 00:19:29,917
The mask!
485
00:19:30,000 --> 00:19:31,417
Go on, go on, get out of here.
486
00:19:31,500 --> 00:19:32,834
That's just rude.
487
00:19:32,917 --> 00:19:36,583
[clears throat]
Now, as I was saying...
488
00:19:36,667 --> 00:19:39,333
Hades, it is I...
489
00:19:39,458 --> 00:19:40,792
Your brother Zeus.
490
00:19:40,875 --> 00:19:42,792
Hey, there he is.
491
00:19:42,875 --> 00:19:46,625
Uh, everybody, there's my boy.
492
00:19:46,709 --> 00:19:49,875
[all yawning]
493
00:19:49,959 --> 00:19:51,583
Well, OK...
494
00:19:51,667 --> 00:19:52,917
Make it snappy, Zeusaphone.
495
00:19:53,041 --> 00:19:54,583
I'm connecting with the people here.
496
00:19:54,709 --> 00:19:58,667
Uh, Hades, I know that
we've had our differences in the past,
497
00:19:58,750 --> 00:20:02,000
but you've really gotta
listen to me this time.
498
00:20:02,125 --> 00:20:06,583
That mask you wear is cursed, uh,
little brother.
499
00:20:06,667 --> 00:20:08,583
Look out at the balcony.
500
00:20:08,667 --> 00:20:10,333
You're putting the gods to sleep,
501
00:20:10,417 --> 00:20:13,375
and I fear it may be one from which
they'll never wake.
502
00:20:13,458 --> 00:20:15,458
Take off the mask.
503
00:20:15,542 --> 00:20:18,542
Step out from behind the mask
and show the world just--
504
00:20:18,625 --> 00:20:21,208
Just how big a god you really are.
505
00:20:21,291 --> 00:20:22,333
Hey, how do I know
506
00:20:22,417 --> 00:20:25,500
this isn't another one
of your Olympian tricks, Zeus?
507
00:20:25,583 --> 00:20:29,250
Trust me. If you win,
it means Olympus will lose,
508
00:20:29,333 --> 00:20:30,375
Big time.
509
00:20:30,500 --> 00:20:33,125
[sighs]
510
00:20:35,000 --> 00:20:36,750
[Zeus] No! No! No!
511
00:20:36,875 --> 00:20:38,667
The curse was almost down!
512
00:20:41,125 --> 00:20:42,250
Su--
513
00:20:45,792 --> 00:20:48,041
[all moan]
514
00:20:48,125 --> 00:20:51,375
Attaboy, son! Ah, that's my boy!
515
00:20:51,458 --> 00:20:55,041
Star of the show, you know, ha ha ha.
516
00:20:55,500 --> 00:20:59,041
And the Mnemmy goes to--
good gracious--
517
00:20:59,125 --> 00:21:00,959
Icarus and Hercules
518
00:21:01,083 --> 00:21:04,583
for their daring take
on sibling rivalry.
519
00:21:04,709 --> 00:21:07,208
[gasps]
And for saving everyone's bacon.
520
00:21:07,291 --> 00:21:10,875
Oh! OK! I'd like to thank everyone
521
00:21:10,959 --> 00:21:13,291
who voted to give me this award,
522
00:21:13,375 --> 00:21:15,166
but I can't accept it.
523
00:21:15,250 --> 00:21:16,166
[audience gasps]
524
00:21:16,250 --> 00:21:17,834
[Icaurs]
No. Acting is not about awards.
525
00:21:17,917 --> 00:21:20,333
Oh, no. It's about the work.
526
00:21:20,417 --> 00:21:23,750
Thank you, but no, thank you.
527
00:21:25,917 --> 00:21:27,333
Who am I kidding?
528
00:21:27,417 --> 00:21:31,333
Come on! This is the happiest day
of my life!
529
00:21:31,417 --> 00:21:33,542
Herc, I love you, man. Mm-mwa.
530
00:21:33,625 --> 00:21:34,583
Yecch.
531
00:21:34,667 --> 00:21:39,041
Cassandra, come on, honey,
come on down here, be with me, OK?
532
00:21:39,125 --> 00:21:40,250
[audience] Aw...
533
00:21:40,375 --> 00:21:41,583
I love you, I love you,
I love you, I love you.
534
00:21:41,667 --> 00:21:44,458
Mm-hmm, you like me!
535
00:21:44,542 --> 00:21:45,625
[audience cheers]
536
00:21:45,750 --> 00:21:48,458
You really like me!
Good night, everybody!
537
00:21:48,542 --> 00:21:49,583
Good night.
538
00:21:49,667 --> 00:21:52,333
Hah! Bravo, son!
539
00:21:52,417 --> 00:21:54,333
Ouch! That's gonna hurt.
540
00:21:54,417 --> 00:21:59,250
I, uh, I hope this doesn't put
a damper on the good job we're doing.
541
00:22:01,000 --> 00:22:04,208
[Pain] Now, about those paychecks--
forget it!
542
00:22:04,291 --> 00:22:06,709
Uh, we're just do-- forget it!
543
00:22:06,792 --> 00:22:07,917
Ahem. Hello...
544
00:22:08,041 --> 00:22:09,500
[nervous laugh]
545
00:22:09,583 --> 00:22:11,542
How about a dental program, though?
546
00:22:11,625 --> 00:22:13,709
[rumbles]
547
00:22:18,375 --> 00:22:20,375
[theme music playing]
38161
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