Original subtitles

You should take more soda with it.

Morning,

Nan. Morning, Nan. Morning.

Oh, what a mess.

Wow, that was some party Daddy had last night. Yes, dear, it certainly was.

We'll give you a hand.

It must have been well and truly stoned. It's not... Often he shows off his

black bottom.

No, your father never drinks to excess.

Is that you, Nanny? Yes, Mr

Patrick. Good, good.

Morning, Daddy! Oh, girls, girls!

You know, I have got a lump the size of an egg on my head. Oh, let's look.

Very nasty.

May require major surgery.

What party?

Your new book was published, remember?

Yes. Very apt, yes.

Nanny, look, while you're clearing up, if you should find the top of my skull

anywhere, I would like it back.

Darling, can't you keep your hair quiet?

Uh -oh, it's leave daddy alone time.

Let's go and have breakfast. Right.

Nice fatty bacon, greasy pork sausages and fried bread. I should have had you

two drowned at birth!

Good Lord, HG, were you at the party too?

No, you always look like that, don't you?

Oh, Nanny, did I enjoy this do last night?

Don't you remember?

Well, only bits of it.

I seem to remember some fool getting up and doing an impersonation of Shirley

Temple singing on the good ship Lollipop with a floor mop on his head.

That was you, Mr. Patrick.

Oh, but it's all right. Everybody else was being silly too.

Thank you, Nanny.

And Miss Barbara's husband actually threatened to eat a whole vase of roses.

a vase of roses?

That's absolutely ridiculous.

Good Lord.

Here we are, Daddy.

Guaranteed to make your liver sit up and sing. Oh, thank you, darling.

Oh, that was delicious. What was that?

Prairie oyster.

Well, you know, raw egg, Worcester sauce, cayenne pepper, and I chucked in

of bicarbonate for luck.

Thank you, Daddy.

Nanny, last night, did I by any chance do my impersonation of Al Jolson?

I'm afraid you did.

Well, that accounts for the boot polish in my ear this morning.

And then you went into a corner and had a tate -a -tate. Yes, I'm inclined to do

that without me drinking, Nanny.

Al Jolson, I mean.

Whose tate was I tating with?

Your agent.

Georgie? Yes. You and she were talking for ages.

And then you called for a bottle of champagne to celebrate.

Champagne?

Celebrate?

I wonder what we were talking about.

Patrick was talking about investing in the company and becoming a sleeping

partner. Good idea.

He obviously feels that diversification of capital investment with concomitant

Schedule D relief is worth diminution of fiscal liquidity.

Well, that wasn't quite the way he put it. He said he thought it would be a bit

of a giggle.

Well, I think you agree.

Oh, I do. I think from both points of view, it's a sound business proposition.

Shopping. See you later. Hope you feel better soon.

Thank you, darling.

Bye -bye.

Oh, dear.

Oh, you're so wise, HG.

Never touch the stuff.

Gives you spots before the eyes.

Oh, and the most dreadful ringing in the ears, too.

Telephone! What about it, Nanny? It's ringing.

Is it?

Oh, thank God for that.

Stay where you are, HG.

Hello?

Would you speak up? I can't hear a word.

Oh, I'm so sorry.

Hello? Hello, Patrick.

Georgie. I did enjoy your party last night. Yes, I did too.

So I'm told.

What a wonderful kick -off for the shattered head.

Yes, I think it's kicked it right off.

Now, listen, darling, do you remember our little huddle in the corner?

Huddle in the corner?

Yes, you remember what we were talking about.

Well, I... How could I forget?

Oh, well, it was a bit on the spur of the moment, and you'd had a few.

Me? Georgie, I may have been a trifle mellow.

You were as mellow as a newt.

Look, I don't have to be drunk to act the fool, you know.

Good.

Good. Well, in that case, I've decided to accept your proposal.

Oh, well, that is nice.

Because I was thinking that that... Proposal?

Yes, I think you'll make the...

Ideal sleeping partner.

Yes, I'm sure I would, Georgie, but... Are you all right, Mr. Patrick?

It appears that I proposed to Georgie last night.

Look, Georgie, we don't want to rush into this, do we? I mean, are you sure

know what you're doing?

Oh, yes.

I've already spoken to my solicitor. Solicitor?

She's got me by the short... Look, Georgie... Georgie, you want me to

this? Well, all right, darling.

Will you give me a ring?

Yes, yes, I'll give you a ring.

But why don't you drop round sometime and we'll talk it over, eh? If that's

right with your solicitor.

I'll be right over.

Oh, fine. Well, see you then, eh?

Bye.

What?

Oh, that, yes.

My God, what have I done?

May I be the first to congratulate you? Marriage.

I can't remember the first thing about it, Nanny.

It'll all come back to you. It's like riding a bicycle.

I mean... I meant about asking her, Nanny.

Mind you, of course, I'm very fond of Georgie. But I've served my sentence,

Nanny. I was married to Barbara for donkey's years.

Well, if you're not sure about it, you can always change your mind. Nanny,

is such a thing as integrity and honour.

And breach a promise.

I think they've done away with that.

She's bound to get me on something.

False pretenses.

Or non -consummation. Or arson in one of Her Majesty's shipyards. Something.

Besides, I could do worse, though, couldn't I?

Yes, indeed.

I'm told she's a very good cook.

Oh, yes, that too, Nanny.

Oh, my God, that can't be her already, can it?

I mean, I know she's fast, but she's not as fast as all that.

Oh, Lord, really, why do these things have to happen to me when I'm feeling so

awful?

Darling! Oh, it's you, Barbara.

Good morning, Shirley Temple.

Very funny.

Thank you, Nanny.

Are the girls out? They've gone shopping.

Oh.

You and Bill get home all right last night? Well, eventually.

He insisted on me driving. He said he was too drunk to sing.

How do you feel today?

Oh, praying for death. And he's furious because he left his banjo behind.

Oh, I've done that, Barbara.

Oh, Nanny.

What a pity.

I say, I've won £25 on the premium bonds. That's amazing.

Why? I haven't got any premium bonds.

I think that must be mine.

Oh, look.

I've actually won.

I'm all of a tis one.

I didn't know you were a gambler, Nanny.

Well, that's not gambling. It's the post office.

Oh, it's about to be 25 pounds.

Yes, well, don't let it change your way of life, Nanny.

But congratulations all the same. And from me.

Oh, thank you. But it's really Mr. Patrick you should be congratulating.

I'll go and put on the kettle, my little.

Well?

Well, what?

Well, what have you got to tell me?

Who said I got anything to tell you?

What's it got to do with Nanny?

Patrick, what have I got to congratulate you about?

Oh, that!

Oh,

yes, well, you know Georgie?

Yes. My agent.

Yes. Yes, yes, I thought you would, yes.

And you know me.

Yes. Yes, of course you do, yes. Well, Georgie and I have sort of...

Well, you know.

Well, you are both well over 21.

No, no, I haven't finished yet, no.

We are going to be married, apparently.

Good grief.

Now, sit down, Barbara, sit down, sit down there. All right. Well, I suppose

is time you bit on the bullet again. I beg your pardon?

Does she know about your snoring? Yes.

Yes, of course. How silly of me.

Very silly.

Anyway, I do not snore. I simply have loud dreams.

Besides, she won't come to bed wearing enormous false eyelashes.

They happened to be in fashion at the time. Every time you blinked, you blew

bedclothes off me.

How do the girls feel about you getting married again? Well, they don't know

yet. I didn't know myself until half an hour ago.

He won't be long. Oh, thank you, Nanny.

I'd better go and get out of these pyjamas before Georgie arrives.

Oh, I should keep them on. I mean, you don't want her to think you're too

Patrick's wig.

I must put that away for his next party. Really, how can a grown man be such a

baby? Danny, have you seen... On the good ship, lollipop, it's too cheap for

candy shop.

Mind your arthritis.

Danny, have you seen my shoes, my lovely brown suede ones I was wearing last

night? You mean these?

I must put them in the oven and see if I can dry them out.

Oh, I nearly forgot. Bill thinks he left his spectacles here last night. I

didn't know he wore spectacles. Well, he doesn't. He keeps leaving them

everywhere. Perhaps Nanny knows where they are.

All right, I'll get it, Nanny. It'll be Georgie.

Oh, hello, darling. Come in. Thank you.

Fairly temple.

Now, don't you start.

You're feeling very fragile after last night.

Oh, poor darling. I won't keep you long.

Now, shall we get right down to it?

Barbara and Nanny are in the kitchen.

Good, they can be witnesses.

What? Now, Patrick, about your proposal.

Look, Georgia, I think perhaps I ought to tell you... You do realise that you

won't be an active partner?

Well,

I'm not as young as I was, but there's life in the old dog yet, I can tell you.

No, no, it's far better for you to leave it entirely in my hands. What?

Well, I'm more experienced than you are.

You see, the best way to do it is just... Invest.

You mean nothing else?

My solicitor says that you'll get considerable relief in the first year.

No, George, no.

There is another side to this. I mean, I want your company.

Well, you'll get 10 % of it.

10 %?

Well, what will you be doing the rest of the time?

Well, I shall be getting along with my usual affairs.

What?

What else? Well, really.

Patrick, where are your shoes?

They're in the oven.

I'll go and see if they're done.

Oh, Barbara. Oh, you know Georgie, don't you? Yes.

And I know you, too.

Yes, I was afraid of that, yes.

Hello. Hello. Oh, you've had your hair done. It looks marvellous. Yes, I'd

have known you if it hadn't been for the dress.

I like yours.

Thank you. It's so brave of you to fly in the face of fashion like that.

Have you seen a pair of spectacles anywhere? No. My poor husband can't see

thing without them.

Really? Did he wear them before he married you? No, he didn't.

Actually, such a pity you have to wear them.

I think I'll go upstairs and see if they're there.

Oh, I nearly forgot. I believe congratulations are in order.

Congratulations. Well, it is high time Patrick stopped enjoying himself and got

married again.

Patrick? Getting married?

I think they've dried out too much, Nanny. They're on fire.

Oh, I'm ever so sorry. It's all the excitement.

What, with me winning £25 and you getting married?

Yes. We're both lucky, Nanny, aren't we?

Patrick? Barbara just told me the good news.

What news?

Who's the lucky woman?

Lucky woman?

Lucky... Oh!

Well, Nanny, of course. Who else?

Nanny?

Oh,

I'm ever so thrilled.

She's been trying for years and finally landed a prize.

Oh, well, I suppose I always thought that one day I might. Well, don't give

hope, darling.

I mean, I'm sure that Ernie will oblige. Ernie?

That old car park attendant?

I'm not that desperate, thank you.

Goodbye. Yes, but I mean, we've got things to discuss, Georgie. Not now,

Patrick. I'm just a little upset. But do you want to discuss the wedding

arrangements and the honeymoon? No, I do not.

What was all that about? I don't know.

She seemed to be... She seemed to be upset because Nanny had won a premium

Very odd.

Well, I found Bill's glasses.

The crunch gave them away. I stood on them.

I'm not surprised.

You always were clumsy, weren't you?

Well,

I think I'll go and say goodbye to Nanny.

I've been looking for a coffee -coloured bra for ages.

Size 36.

Do you think you're inviting friends in with you?

At least mine don't squint. Don't be rude.

Oh, hello, girl.

Hello. We've been shopping and we thought we'd pop in. Mm, scrounge of

coffee. Hey, we bought Daddy a tie.

What do you think?

Mickey Mouse?

King Rat would be more appropriate.

Huh? I'm sorry, girls, I shouldn't have said that.

It's just that I'm a little upset that he didn't tell me he was... Getting

married.

Married? Yes.

To Nanny.

Nanny?

Well, I think I've got everything.

This broken spectacle.

His broken banjo.

You will tell him it was an accident, won't you? Oh, I shouldn't worry. The

he plays it, it can only sound better.

Goodbye, Patrick. Goodbye, darling.

Oh, you will ask me to the wedding, won't you? Well, after all, you were

mine. Yes, and I enjoyed the second one better.

I think I'll wear my white outfit.

Unless, of course, Georgie... Oh, no.

No, she wouldn't be wearing white, would she?

Goodbye, Barbara.

Mr. Patrick, do you think Karen would mind if I gave this dress of hers to the

vicar? I shouldn't think so, Nanny, but won't it clash with his eyes?

He's coming round this afternoon to pick up some things for the jumble sale.

Oh, I see. No, no, let him have it, Nanny. It's last month's dial. She'll

wear it again.

Oh, I was thinking, as he is coming round, might it not be a chance for you

discuss the wedding arrangements with him? Well, I haven't discussed them with

Georgie yet.

Daddy and Nanny?

Well, that's incredible.

Well, I could understand if it was you.

Oh, thank you.

Well, I mean, you're hardly old at all.

Thank you.

Well, it wouldn't be so bad if he didn't want to discuss all the details with

me.

Hello?

Georgie, it's Patrick.

Look, I'm going ahead with the wedding arrangements.

Oh, yes.

And I just had a wonderful idea for the honeymoon.

You have?

Yes. I thought we might go to that little hotel in Paris.

Remember? Our hotel?

Where?

Hello? Hello?

Do you know, sometimes I think your father has a sadistic streak. I still

believe it. We always thought of Nanny as being married to her rhubarb partner.

He told me himself.

Yes? I'm awfully sorry, darling. We were cut off.

Look, there is one other thing.

Do you think the bedroom is all right as it is, or shall I have it tarted up a

bit?

Georgie, tell us again.

Is the matter with our phones?

Mr Patrick, most important... The wedding guest list.

Oh, good Lord, yes. Well, of course, Mother will want to be there, won't she?

And then there's Bill and Barbara.

And Leo will come.

And Great Aunt Hilda.

Well, I thought she was dead.

She's a very determined woman now.

Is Georgie still engaged?

Yes, but by the way, she's carrying on. Oh, on the telephone. Oh, yes. I can't

get through.

Ah, Georgie? I don't think so. It's the front doorbell.

Good afternoon, Vicar. Do come in. Good afternoon, Mrs. Harris. I'm afraid I'm

on the scrounge again.

Oh, yes, the jumble sale. Yes, the steptoe of St.

Stephen's, that's me.

Vicar, just the man I need.

Ah, it's quite a time, Mr. Glover, since you've been to our little church.

Yes, how the weeks fly.

The last time you came, you left your gas mask behind.

Was it really as long ago as that?

Would you like a glass of sherry? Or a whiskey?

Or a brandy? No, perhaps you're quite right. It is far too early. A nice cup

tea.

Most acceptable.

Do sit down, Vicar.

Now, Mr. Glover, what was it that you wanted to talk to me about?

Well, I want you to marry me.

Me?

To a woman, that is. Oh, of course. Oh, splendid. We get extra for weddings.

Well, there's no mad rush, you know.

Oh, well, that makes a refreshing change these days.

Let's see now. I've got Miss Dryfield and Mr Jenkins on the 27th. Ah, the

happiest day of their lives, eh? Not altogether. I'm burying them.

I wonder if I can fit you in.

Now, what about the first Sunday of Quadrigesima?

Quadrigesima? No, no, I'm afraid Flint.

Who to?

We'll arrange that afterwards.

Now, will you have the full ceremony? Will you have the organ and the choir?

and the floral decorations and all that rhubarb.

Sounds rather like a harvest festival, but I suppose so, yes.

Perhaps I ought to tell you, Vicar, that this will be my second wedding.

Oh, not to worry, it's my 1850th.

Mind you, it was a very amicable divorce, you know, very. In fact, if one

say that divorces are made in heaven... No, perhaps not, no.

Tea, Vicar?

Oh, tea.

How nice.

Would you like some cake?

Oh, no.

Do you mind if I have a drink?

Not at all.

Thank you, Nannick.

1850 weddings, eh, by Jove? You must know the service backwards. I do, but I

find there's been a little call for it that way.

They like it as it is.

Splendid words, aren't they? To have and to hold.

Daddy marrying, Nannick?

The mind boggles. I'll believe it when I hear it.

For richer, for poorer.

In sickness and in health.

To love and to cherish.

And to death, Astupa.

Blimey, they're doing it now.

Yes, that's very nice, Vicar. I must... Ah, Anna, Karen, do you know my

daughters, Vicar? I've seen them passing by the church many times.

I keep meaning to send them to Sunday school.

Nanny, you've got some jumble for the vicar, haven't you? I'll come and give

a hand.

We thought you were marrying them here.

Marrying them?

You mean your father?

Nanny, yes.

They're the ones that are getting... Married, yes.

Well, I'm blessed.

Would you put this in the back of the vicar's car? Thank you. And this one,

darling. Thank you so much. Mr Glover, Mrs Harris, may I say how thrilled I am?

We've quite enjoyed getting our old things together.

What do you think? Well, I suppose that's as good as any. What do you

Mrs. Harris?

Oh, I don't think it's my place to give an opinion.

Oh, you've got a well -trained old boy.

Yes, love a wedding tin.

Now, have you planned the honeymoon?

Well, we thought we'd go to Paris, actually. You'll love Paris, my dear.

Oh, I'm not going.

Not going?

No. What makes you think I want her on my honeymoon?

Don't you think you'll find her rather necessary?

No, I shall have Georgie.

Georgie? Who's he?

He is a she.

Mr. Patrick's literary agent.

What does she want her on the honeymoon for?

Do I have to tell you, Vicar?

Yes, you do.

Can't you use your imagination?

I'd rather not.

You're marrying this poor woman here and taking a paramour on your honeymoon.

I'm not marrying Nanny.

You're not.

No, I'm marrying Georgie. You're not.

The way Georgie feels about you at the moment, she won't even go through with

your business proposal.

Business proposal?

through with this business deal, and I'm going to tell him to his face. Yes, but

why not? Oh, belt up, Timothy.

I'm sorry, but it's just that Patrick's positively gloating that he's going to

marry somebody else. Surely not. Yes.

I don't want another sleeping partner in the office or anywhere else.

Georgie, I'm not marrying you. Isn't it wonderful?

Well, that takes the cake.