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♪ Who put the "glad" in Gladiator? ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Whose daring deeds are great theater? ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Is he bold? ♪
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♪ No one braver ♪
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♪ Is he sweet? ♪
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♪ Our favorite flavor, Hercules ♪
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-♪ What a guy ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
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-♪ Ask his friends ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
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-♪ Hercules ♪-♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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♪ Hercules ♪
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-♪ Come on ♪-♪ No one's fool ♪
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♪ Now the boy's in school ♪
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♪ He's in trainin' ♪
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♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
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♪ No complainin' ♪
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♪ He was a no one ♪
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♪ Zero, zero, give him a quick deed ♪
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♪ He's our hero ♪
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♪ He's the most likely to succeed ♪
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♪ From zero to hero ♪
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♪ Herc is a hero ♪
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♪ He'll be a hero ♪
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Wait and see!
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[Bob reading]
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[narrator] Long, long ago,
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in ancient, ancient Greece,
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elemental chaos ruled the earth.
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It was the dark age of the Titans.
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The mighty Zeus himself stepped upand stopped the pandemonium.
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Safely imprisoned beneath the deepest sea,
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the Titans ruled no more.
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Gods and mortals alike rejoiced.
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Everyone was happy.
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Well, almost everyone.
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Comrades! The noble Titans
have been captive too long.
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We demand their freedom!
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[all] Yes!
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Today we bring the usurper Zeus
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to his 60-cubit-high knees!
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[all] Yes!
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Today Zeus shall know and fear
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the people's organization
of titanic liberators!
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[all] Yes!
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For today, we target
the Prometheus Academy,
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for it is there
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we shall seize the usurper's
own flesh and blood--
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Hercules!
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[all] Pootl! Pootl!
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Pootl! Pootl!
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[Icarus crying]
56
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Oh, wow. Icarus, what happened in there?
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You're crying.
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Ohh!
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Tears of joy, my friend!
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Tears o' joy.
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My career-destiny reading.
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Read it, and you, too, shall weep.
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It says you're destined for a career
in a Greek chorus?
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That's right!
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Musical theater, baby!
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A Greek chorus line.
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Oh, Gods! I hope I get it.
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[Parenthesis] Hercules.
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[Hercules] So, Mr. Parenthesis, sir,
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how does this career test work?
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With great exactitude
and a bucket of oxen guts.
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Oxen...
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Guts.
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Minus the kidneys. Too slippery.
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00:02:50,667 --> 00:02:53,917
For generations, we have used
the oracular reading of oxen guts
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to predict our students' careers...
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or lack thereof.
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Yeggh.
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Couldn't you use some sort of...
aptitude test instead?
80
00:03:01,542 --> 00:03:02,792
We tried that.
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The oxen guts were more accurate by 72%.
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-Aha!
-What is it?
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These guts clearly indicate, alpha--
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That this ox needed more roughage,
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and, beta-- that you are destined
for a career as a liberator.
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A liberator?
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Oh. You mean someone who frees people,
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does good deeds?
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Ha ha! Sounds like a hero to me.
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Whoops. Misread the pancreas.
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My mistake.
92
00:03:29,041 --> 00:03:31,208
You're not going to be a liberator.
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You're going to be a librarian.
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What?
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No way.
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Librarians hang out in...
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Eegh! Libraries.
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I'm a hero-in-training.
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Hercules, we live in an age of learning--
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Reason, Philosophy--
with the occasional sacrifice.
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There is simply no place
in the modern world
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for the mindless, sweaty,
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hairy-backed machismo of the hero.
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[smash]
105
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What's all this, then?
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[Hercules] Another "Beat Sparta" rally?
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No. It couldn't be.
108
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But it is.
109
00:04:00,041 --> 00:04:00,959
No, it isn't. Yes, it is.
110
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It's Pootls! Hide!
111
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Why? They're so cute,
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with those poofy little tails.
113
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[Parenthesis] Not poodles.
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Pootls!
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The Popular-- or is it the People's--
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Organization of Titanic Liberators.
117
00:04:12,834 --> 00:04:15,083
It's a radical group who want to return
to the dark age
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when Titans ruled the earth.
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Hah. This is where you need a hero-- ugh!
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Tsk tsk tsk. A head is a terrible thing
to waste.
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We'll reason our way out of this,
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if I can find the right page.
123
00:04:28,082 --> 00:04:30,582
Uh, uh... IIcarus,
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your flair for the dance is stunning,
125
00:04:33,250 --> 00:04:36,959
but we are practicing
the joy of javelins today.
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Come on, Mr. Phys Oedipus!
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Soft sandal, everybody.
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Oh! Dance, ten. Brains, three.
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[thumping]
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Huh.
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Well, that doesn't sound very soft.
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Ooh-ooh! Transfer students.
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Oh, [stutters]
I see you're ready--
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Ready for javelin day. Great!
135
00:05:03,667 --> 00:05:06,750
That'll be a lovely olive soufflé, Helen.
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00:05:06,834 --> 00:05:09,875
Does anyone know why we always, always,
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always keep a soufflé on the fire?
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Cassandra?
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You just never know who's going to pop by.
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That's right, Cassandra.
That's exactly right.
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00:05:19,582 --> 00:05:22,457
Like the invading Titanists
outside our classroom.
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Oh!
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Barbarian!
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A gentleman should always abduct a lady
from the left.
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Uh, sorry, ma'am.
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Full classroom emptiness
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99.9% double confirmed
and re-verified, sir!
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Where is Hercules?
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00:05:48,166 --> 00:05:50,625
Uh, well, sir, he's the .1.
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00:05:50,709 --> 00:05:52,542
Whereabouts currently negatively known,
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00:05:52,625 --> 00:05:53,834
uh, sir!
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Students of the Prometheus Academy,
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we are the Pootls.
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Oh, the poodles, like the fluffy dog.
155
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No, not like the fluffy dog.
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We are the Peoples' Organization of
Titanic Liberators.
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And you, boys and girls, are our hostages.
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Ooh! I always wanted to be a hostage.
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It's so edgy. The bewilderment,
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the unspeakable mind-bending terror.
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00:06:22,125 --> 00:06:25,041
Actually, it's a lot
like hanging out with you.
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Cooperate and everything
will be just figgy.
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Now, can anyone tell me the whereabouts
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of one of your little friends
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by the name of Hercules?
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Ha! Poodle boy doesn't know
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is that our hero-in-residence
is in Parenthesis' office.
168
00:06:43,667 --> 00:06:45,625
Adonis, I can't stay here.
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I have an olive soufflé in
the home grec oven.
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It'll just be a disaster.
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Fear not, my princess,
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I will speak with this uncouth ruffian.
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Excuse me, I believe you
are the lead poodle.
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Top dog if you will.
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Top dog, ah, me. Yes, well, look.
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Daddums is richer than a chocolate-covered
falafel ball.
177
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Let us go and you can fill in
any amount you'd like.
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00:07:09,542 --> 00:07:12,417
There is no price tag
on freedom, rich boy.
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Now, where is Hercules?
180
00:07:14,417 --> 00:07:17,625
Oh, no. We nobles have a very strict
code of honor.
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I could never betray a classmate.
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Very well.
183
00:07:20,875 --> 00:07:23,207
Major Bias, prepare a hot bath
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for this honorable young noble.
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Oh, that's better. Thank you.
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A bath of boiling oil.
187
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He's in Parenthesis' office.
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[Antaeus] Retrieve him at once.
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Adonis, how could you?
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Well, what can I say?
191
00:07:38,834 --> 00:07:42,332
We nobles also have a very strong instinct
for self-preservation.
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Get ready for some heroic action.
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[Parenthesis] No, Hercules.
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These blue scrolls,
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00:07:48,457 --> 00:07:49,709
copyright the Minoan construction
196
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and commode company,
197
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and human reason are our best weapons.
198
00:07:54,041 --> 00:07:56,125
Aha. Here it is.
199
00:07:56,207 --> 00:07:59,041
Commence non-traditional entry maneuvers.
200
00:08:06,542 --> 00:08:08,625
Negative herculean presence.
201
00:08:08,709 --> 00:08:11,041
Effect return to operations center, ASAP.
202
00:08:12,458 --> 00:08:15,333
See there? A perfect example of
the superiority of reason
203
00:08:15,417 --> 00:08:16,667
over impulsive action.
204
00:08:16,750 --> 00:08:19,250
Now, please save us from
that giant aqueduct rat,
205
00:08:19,332 --> 00:08:22,332
man-eating variety,
while I ponder our next step.
206
00:08:25,875 --> 00:08:27,125
[mumbling]
207
00:08:29,709 --> 00:08:30,750
[Hercules] Ow!
208
00:08:35,417 --> 00:08:36,750
[screeching]
209
00:08:36,959 --> 00:08:40,375
Capital! This branch of the aqueduct
goes directly
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00:08:40,457 --> 00:08:43,875
and conveniently to the Athens police
department's men's room.
211
00:08:43,959 --> 00:08:46,333
There. Reason has saved us.
212
00:08:46,417 --> 00:08:49,250
Reason wasn't the one
kicking rat tail back there.
213
00:08:49,333 --> 00:08:51,208
Let's see now, uh,
214
00:08:51,290 --> 00:08:53,709
this way will take us to the cafeterium.
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00:08:53,792 --> 00:08:56,040
[sighs] Whatever reason dictates.
216
00:08:56,875 --> 00:08:58,290
All right, look alive, men.
217
00:08:58,375 --> 00:09:01,250
The Athens P.D. received an urgent S.O.S.
218
00:09:01,333 --> 00:09:02,834
about rampaging poodles.
219
00:09:04,917 --> 00:09:06,917
We've called in the expert.
220
00:09:07,000 --> 00:09:09,250
The dog catcher.
221
00:09:10,000 --> 00:09:13,417
We are not poodles, we are Pootls!
222
00:09:13,500 --> 00:09:16,291
The People's Organization
of Titanic Liberators.
223
00:09:16,375 --> 00:09:19,625
Uh, this canine confusion
is a negative, sir.
224
00:09:19,709 --> 00:09:20,959
I know.
225
00:09:21,041 --> 00:09:22,709
We are to be taken seriously.
226
00:09:22,792 --> 00:09:24,792
We have demands!
227
00:09:25,291 --> 00:09:27,291
Sorry to waste your time.
228
00:09:27,375 --> 00:09:29,083
What are your demands?
229
00:09:29,500 --> 00:09:32,333
I demand to speak with Zeus!
230
00:09:33,165 --> 00:09:34,500
Forget it!
231
00:09:34,583 --> 00:09:37,959
Zeus has a strict "No negotiating with
Titanists" policy.
232
00:09:38,040 --> 00:09:40,165
But I'll run it by him.
233
00:09:41,125 --> 00:09:42,125
[cat screeches]
234
00:09:44,542 --> 00:09:47,250
You see? Brain power, my boy,
235
00:09:47,333 --> 00:09:48,792
has allowed us--
236
00:09:48,875 --> 00:09:50,375
Shh! There's the leader.
237
00:09:50,458 --> 00:09:53,040
Soon Zeus himself will cower.
238
00:09:53,125 --> 00:09:55,375
Be proud, my Pootls!
239
00:09:55,458 --> 00:09:57,458
[cheering]
240
00:09:57,542 --> 00:09:59,083
They're holding the school hostage.
241
00:10:00,542 --> 00:10:03,083
A classic hero situation.
242
00:10:03,291 --> 00:10:07,083
Heroics and reckless horseplay
are forbidden in the cafeterium.
243
00:10:07,166 --> 00:10:08,417
Hercules, stop!
244
00:10:09,542 --> 00:10:11,458
This means detention.
245
00:10:11,542 --> 00:10:12,709
Hercules.
246
00:10:12,834 --> 00:10:14,834
As a hero-in-training, I must request
247
00:10:14,917 --> 00:10:18,166
that you release these innocent students
and surrender.
248
00:10:18,250 --> 00:10:19,667
I think not.
249
00:10:19,750 --> 00:10:22,083
Spawn of Zeus!
250
00:10:22,166 --> 00:10:23,208
Aah
251
00:10:23,291 --> 00:10:24,208
[thud]
252
00:10:24,291 --> 00:10:27,291
Sorry. Sometimes I don't know
my own strength.
253
00:10:27,375 --> 00:10:29,291
That makes two of us.
254
00:10:48,165 --> 00:10:49,250
Uh-oh.
255
00:10:49,375 --> 00:10:52,208
Ye Gods and minor deities,
256
00:10:52,290 --> 00:10:57,040
the incredibly horrible giant
and half-titan Antaeus.
257
00:10:59,875 --> 00:11:02,125
Aah! Aah!
258
00:11:02,291 --> 00:11:04,959
Feels like... a whole Titan to me.
259
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:09,166
Hero to plush toy, just like that.
260
00:11:12,583 --> 00:11:13,583
Hercules!
261
00:11:21,166 --> 00:11:23,625
[narrator] And so, sirens blaring,
262
00:11:23,750 --> 00:11:27,208
the Athens P.D. racedto the temple of Zeus
263
00:11:27,291 --> 00:11:29,041
with the grim news.
264
00:11:29,291 --> 00:11:32,500
This is gonna go over
like a bronze balloon.
265
00:11:32,917 --> 00:11:36,375
You're having trouble with a bunch
of fluffy doggies?
266
00:11:36,458 --> 00:11:37,875
No, sir. The Pootls.
267
00:11:37,959 --> 00:11:40,625
A pack of Titan-loving extremists.
268
00:11:40,709 --> 00:11:43,000
They want you to free the Titans.
269
00:11:43,125 --> 00:11:45,417
What? Free the Titans?
270
00:11:45,500 --> 00:11:50,165
Do you have any idea what it was like
in the dark age of the Titans?
271
00:11:50,542 --> 00:11:51,709
Dark?
272
00:11:51,792 --> 00:11:54,917
It was bedlam! Pandemonium!
273
00:11:55,000 --> 00:11:59,165
The unrelenting bleakness of
primordial chaos.
274
00:11:59,250 --> 00:12:01,750
Plus there was this nasty odor.
275
00:12:01,875 --> 00:12:04,166
And they want to go back to that?
276
00:12:04,250 --> 00:12:09,041
I'll inform the Titanists
that you will not give in to their demand.
277
00:12:09,125 --> 00:12:15,291
Don't bother. Heh, I'll deal with
the Titanists myself.
278
00:12:15,375 --> 00:12:19,458
Hephaestus! Charge up the bolts, baby!
279
00:12:19,959 --> 00:12:22,083
Herc? Herc-meister?
280
00:12:22,166 --> 00:12:23,125
Come on, come on, buddy.
281
00:12:23,208 --> 00:12:25,250
How many fingers am I holding up?
Come on.
282
00:12:25,333 --> 00:12:27,291
Uh, that's a trick question.
283
00:12:27,375 --> 00:12:29,750
They're toes, all toes.
284
00:12:30,333 --> 00:12:32,417
His sundial's been rung.
285
00:12:32,500 --> 00:12:36,709
Let me see, school taken by Pootls,
students held hostage,
286
00:12:36,792 --> 00:12:39,375
hero-in-training confounded...
287
00:12:39,458 --> 00:12:43,417
This calls for immediate thought.
288
00:12:43,500 --> 00:12:45,959
Plan alpha-- Do nothing, very tempting.
289
00:12:46,040 --> 00:12:47,083
Plan beta...
290
00:12:47,165 --> 00:12:48,125
What of my soufflé?
291
00:12:48,208 --> 00:12:52,250
Uh, can't somebody do something
before we have a culinary disaster.
292
00:12:52,333 --> 00:12:53,333
I can.
293
00:12:53,417 --> 00:12:56,333
Deep in each one of us
is a special ability,
294
00:12:56,417 --> 00:13:00,458
I know it, you know it,
the ox guts know it.
295
00:13:00,542 --> 00:13:06,291
Now, it's time for my gods
given talent to shine.
296
00:13:06,375 --> 00:13:07,291
Icarus...
297
00:13:07,375 --> 00:13:08,375
[music starts]
298
00:13:09,834 --> 00:13:12,583
♪ Hello, my dolma, hello, my date loaf ♪
299
00:13:12,667 --> 00:13:15,208
♪ Hello, my psychic gal ♪
300
00:13:15,291 --> 00:13:18,375
♪ Yakka-ta-ta, yakka-ta-ta ♪
301
00:13:18,458 --> 00:13:19,667
Ta-da!
302
00:13:21,834 --> 00:13:25,125
Break a leg, Icarus. Or two, ideally.
303
00:13:25,208 --> 00:13:29,000
You can't keep this kind of
talent from the world, baby.
304
00:13:29,083 --> 00:13:31,375
Now come on, let us go.
305
00:13:31,458 --> 00:13:33,208
Jazz hands, everybody.
306
00:13:33,290 --> 00:13:34,625
Musical theater.
307
00:13:34,709 --> 00:13:36,542
Yeah, isn't it magical?
308
00:13:36,625 --> 00:13:39,583
I hate musical theater.
309
00:13:39,667 --> 00:13:41,583
Oh, even rock opera?
310
00:13:41,667 --> 00:13:43,250
Hey, leave him alone!
311
00:13:43,417 --> 00:13:45,583
Ah, spawn of the usurper.
312
00:13:45,667 --> 00:13:47,959
Still feeling heroic?
313
00:13:48,040 --> 00:13:50,083
No! Think!
314
00:13:50,917 --> 00:13:52,208
That's right, Antaeus.
315
00:13:52,290 --> 00:13:54,208
No more Mr. Thinking guy.
316
00:13:54,290 --> 00:13:57,125
I don't care how big and rocky you are.
317
00:13:57,208 --> 00:13:58,458
I'm a hero-in-training and I...
318
00:13:58,542 --> 00:14:00,000
[Chipacles] Titanist!
319
00:14:00,083 --> 00:14:01,959
Hold that thought, would you?
320
00:14:02,041 --> 00:14:04,709
Zeus has heard your demand.
321
00:14:04,792 --> 00:14:06,333
He'll be here momentarily
322
00:14:06,458 --> 00:14:09,917
to deliver his reply personally.
323
00:14:10,000 --> 00:14:12,834
Excellent. Sorry, you were saying?
324
00:14:12,917 --> 00:14:14,875
[sighs] I was saying,
325
00:14:14,959 --> 00:14:16,250
I'm a hero-in-training.
326
00:14:16,333 --> 00:14:18,542
You can keep me, but you'd
better release my friends,
327
00:14:18,625 --> 00:14:21,083
or... or else!
328
00:14:21,166 --> 00:14:23,417
All right. OK, you asked for--
329
00:14:23,500 --> 00:14:25,208
Huh? You'll let them go?
330
00:14:25,291 --> 00:14:28,333
Well, uh, oh, great. Uh, thanks.
331
00:14:28,417 --> 00:14:29,500
It's my pleasure.
332
00:14:29,583 --> 00:14:31,875
Major Bias, release the other students.
333
00:14:31,959 --> 00:14:33,165
Sir, yes, sir!
334
00:14:34,458 --> 00:14:36,083
Oh, yes!
335
00:14:36,333 --> 00:14:37,500
Sweet freedom.
336
00:14:37,583 --> 00:14:40,625
The 2-step combo gets them every time.
337
00:14:40,709 --> 00:14:43,333
Zeus is gonna give these Titanists
338
00:14:43,417 --> 00:14:46,290
a one-way ticket to Hades.
339
00:14:46,375 --> 00:14:48,208
But Hercules is still in there.
340
00:14:48,333 --> 00:14:51,834
Oh, don't worry, my little ingenue.
341
00:14:51,917 --> 00:14:55,165
Herc has some fancy footwork of his own.
342
00:14:55,250 --> 00:14:58,040
Heh, I knew a little action
was all we needed.
343
00:14:58,290 --> 00:15:01,166
The hostages are free. Problem solved.
344
00:15:01,250 --> 00:15:04,959
That, my heroic friend,
is where you are mistaken.
345
00:15:07,625 --> 00:15:10,375
You are the only hostage I need.
346
00:15:10,458 --> 00:15:12,667
I always planned to let the others go.
347
00:15:12,750 --> 00:15:14,834
Oh, oh... oh.
348
00:15:14,917 --> 00:15:19,166
You heroes are so strong on action,
and so weak on reason.
349
00:15:20,875 --> 00:15:21,834
[Parenthesis] There.
350
00:15:21,917 --> 00:15:24,458
The perfectly reasoned attack.
351
00:15:26,542 --> 00:15:27,583
[boink]
352
00:15:27,667 --> 00:15:28,667
[thud]
353
00:15:29,083 --> 00:15:31,208
You'll never get away with this.
My father will--
354
00:15:31,291 --> 00:15:33,417
Do exactly as I say.
355
00:15:33,500 --> 00:15:35,750
Zeus will not endanger his son,
356
00:15:35,834 --> 00:15:38,125
his demi-godling.
357
00:15:38,208 --> 00:15:39,417
You see, Hercules,
358
00:15:39,500 --> 00:15:40,875
we are much alike, you and I.
359
00:15:40,959 --> 00:15:42,875
Caught between two worlds.
360
00:15:42,959 --> 00:15:45,542
Except I'm good and you're evil.
361
00:15:45,625 --> 00:15:46,709
Now you're splitting hairs.
362
00:15:46,792 --> 00:15:49,458
I'm so sorry, I beg your pardon, but--
363
00:15:49,542 --> 00:15:52,208
Oops. [imitating bias]
Recommend prisoner evacuation
364
00:15:52,290 --> 00:15:54,792
to low or non-risk location, sir!
365
00:15:54,875 --> 00:15:56,583
Very well, Major.
366
00:15:56,667 --> 00:15:58,165
Hey, where are we going?
367
00:16:03,250 --> 00:16:04,291
Parenthesis!
368
00:16:04,375 --> 00:16:06,375
As you can see, my, if I may say so,
369
00:16:06,458 --> 00:16:09,333
cleverly reasoned subterfuge
has effected your escape,
370
00:16:09,417 --> 00:16:12,542
which your heroics, brave as they may be,
could not.
371
00:16:12,625 --> 00:16:15,333
[muffled cries]
372
00:16:15,417 --> 00:16:17,208
Hercules.
373
00:16:22,291 --> 00:16:25,166
Isn't the Colossus
supposed to be in Rhodes?
374
00:16:25,250 --> 00:16:28,917
Well, speaking as a former
Rhodes scholar honorary,
375
00:16:29,000 --> 00:16:31,583
this certainly isn't that Colossus.
376
00:16:31,667 --> 00:16:34,959
Hello! Enter Zeus.
377
00:16:36,792 --> 00:16:39,290
Sweet Mother Earth!
378
00:16:41,583 --> 00:16:44,959
Lay down your thunderbolt
of oppression, tyrant.
379
00:16:45,040 --> 00:16:47,500
Behold my hostage.
380
00:16:49,208 --> 00:16:50,290
Son?
381
00:16:50,375 --> 00:16:52,290
Uh, hi, Dad.
382
00:16:56,333 --> 00:16:58,000
Hercules.
383
00:16:58,083 --> 00:16:59,500
Sorry, Father.
384
00:16:59,583 --> 00:17:01,625
I got all the other hostages out, though.
385
00:17:01,709 --> 00:17:03,500
That's good, son, that's good.
386
00:17:04,125 --> 00:17:07,040
-Where are you going?
-To release the Titans.
387
00:17:07,125 --> 00:17:10,416
It's not worth losing you over, my boy.
388
00:17:10,500 --> 00:17:13,709
Ah, Zeus, I'm so glad you see things
in a reasonable light.
389
00:17:14,250 --> 00:17:17,165
No, Father, wait!
I can't let him do this.
390
00:17:17,625 --> 00:17:21,959
My plan, though I hate to admit it,
seems to have failed.
391
00:17:22,040 --> 00:17:25,083
Uh, do you suppose you could, uh,
smash these rocks?
392
00:17:25,165 --> 00:17:26,709
Ha ha! Now you're talking.
393
00:17:31,375 --> 00:17:33,208
You will not escape.
394
00:17:33,291 --> 00:17:35,000
Ah, says you.
395
00:17:35,834 --> 00:17:36,834
[groaning]
396
00:17:36,917 --> 00:17:40,166
I'm beginning to appreciate
this acting heroic business.
397
00:17:40,250 --> 00:17:41,542
Oh, no.
398
00:17:41,625 --> 00:17:43,458
But on the other hand, I do hear
very good things
399
00:17:43,542 --> 00:17:45,750
about running away in terror. Aah!
400
00:17:48,333 --> 00:17:50,959
If it's not too much trouble,
where are we going?
401
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:52,709
The front gate is that way.
402
00:17:52,792 --> 00:17:56,959
Heh, I know.
But we're going to the library.
403
00:17:57,041 --> 00:17:58,208
Aah!
404
00:17:58,291 --> 00:18:00,166
Here. Fight them off.
405
00:18:01,583 --> 00:18:03,125
[groaning]
406
00:18:03,458 --> 00:18:04,625
Really now--
407
00:18:05,125 --> 00:18:06,875
Let's discuss this reasonably,
say tomorrow?
408
00:18:06,959 --> 00:18:07,959
Ooh!
409
00:18:11,000 --> 00:18:12,417
[groaning]
410
00:18:14,166 --> 00:18:16,625
Adrenaline rush! Or is it my bladder?
411
00:18:16,709 --> 00:18:18,375
Hey, not bad.
412
00:18:18,458 --> 00:18:20,208
[rumbling]
413
00:18:20,291 --> 00:18:21,291
Come on!
414
00:18:23,959 --> 00:18:25,875
Lovely soufflé. Olive, I think.
415
00:18:35,041 --> 00:18:37,208
-Yes!
-Great explosion!
416
00:18:37,291 --> 00:18:38,291
Ooh, good thinking, too.
417
00:18:38,375 --> 00:18:39,375
Uh-oh.
418
00:18:41,458 --> 00:18:44,041
We better hit the scrolls, fast.
419
00:18:45,583 --> 00:18:49,417
[Zeus] Poseidon, reveal the Titans.
420
00:18:49,500 --> 00:18:51,709
You heard me, Po-Po.
421
00:18:58,709 --> 00:18:59,834
Ammunition.
422
00:19:01,208 --> 00:19:03,542
"Homer, Hacied, heroic's digest,
423
00:19:03,625 --> 00:19:05,709
how to win frays and influence monsters."
424
00:19:05,792 --> 00:19:07,417
Hey, this is pretty cool stuff.
425
00:19:07,500 --> 00:19:11,709
Ha! "The complete worksof Pindar unabridged."
426
00:19:11,792 --> 00:19:14,875
This baby will do some damage.
427
00:19:14,959 --> 00:19:17,000
Uh, that's not what I had in mind.
428
00:19:17,083 --> 00:19:19,417
Oh, here we go, here we go,
now we're talking.
429
00:19:19,500 --> 00:19:20,959
Ooh. What's that?
430
00:19:21,041 --> 00:19:23,917
"Social registry of Gods,Titans, and other immortals.
431
00:19:24,000 --> 00:19:26,125
Copyright Hyperion scribes,
all rights reserved."
432
00:19:27,250 --> 00:19:28,250
This way!
433
00:19:35,458 --> 00:19:39,375
Uh, "Aeolus, Amalthea... Antaeus!
434
00:19:39,458 --> 00:19:41,917
Half-titan, rocky son of Gaia the Earth--"
435
00:19:42,000 --> 00:19:43,750
Son of Gaia! That's it!
436
00:19:43,834 --> 00:19:46,417
Whenever he touches the Earth
Gaia gives him strength.
437
00:19:46,500 --> 00:19:48,291
[Antaeus] My secret is out.
438
00:19:48,375 --> 00:19:49,834
I'm crushed.
439
00:19:49,959 --> 00:19:51,917
Not yet. [chuckles]
440
00:19:52,000 --> 00:19:53,000
But you will be.
441
00:19:58,500 --> 00:20:00,125
Whoa!
442
00:20:02,834 --> 00:20:04,291
Down, Pootls, down!
443
00:20:06,125 --> 00:20:07,709
No! Stop it, stop it right now!
444
00:20:07,792 --> 00:20:08,709
Put me down!
445
00:20:08,792 --> 00:20:12,083
I think not!
446
00:20:13,417 --> 00:20:14,625
Aah!
447
00:20:20,125 --> 00:20:21,333
Back off.
448
00:20:21,417 --> 00:20:23,041
Stinkin' Titans.
449
00:20:23,125 --> 00:20:26,375
Aah! Oh!
450
00:20:26,458 --> 00:20:31,792
Antaeus. Ha. Guess your plan
went down the drain.
451
00:20:36,333 --> 00:20:37,709
Usurper!
452
00:20:37,792 --> 00:20:39,959
Poseidon, shut 'em up!
453
00:20:44,667 --> 00:20:45,792
All right, all right.
454
00:20:45,875 --> 00:20:49,250
All Pootls in the dog catcher's wagon.
455
00:20:49,458 --> 00:20:53,500
And don't try this
or any other skullduggery again.
456
00:20:53,583 --> 00:20:56,750
Bye! It certainly was a treat
having you in class.
457
00:20:56,834 --> 00:20:58,667
Have a great summer...
458
00:20:58,750 --> 00:21:00,875
in jail.
459
00:21:00,959 --> 00:21:03,041
Show stopper, baby!
460
00:21:03,125 --> 00:21:06,458
Hey, Pootls, next time
rehearse out of town.
461
00:21:06,542 --> 00:21:09,834
And then I, in truly royal fashion,
462
00:21:09,917 --> 00:21:13,041
saved my fellow students
from certain doom.
463
00:21:13,125 --> 00:21:16,458
You? All you did was
royally rat out Hercules.
464
00:21:16,542 --> 00:21:17,834
And if I hadn't,
he wouldn't have been there
465
00:21:17,917 --> 00:21:19,333
to rescue us, now would he?
466
00:21:19,458 --> 00:21:21,041
My soufflé?
467
00:21:21,125 --> 00:21:23,542
Uh, I'm sorry.
468
00:21:23,625 --> 00:21:24,542
It didn't make it.
469
00:21:24,625 --> 00:21:26,125
[gasps] Oh.
470
00:21:27,792 --> 00:21:29,709
Uh, you wanted to see me?
471
00:21:29,792 --> 00:21:31,792
Ah, yes, Hercules. Come in, come in.
472
00:21:31,875 --> 00:21:34,166
I've decided that our
old scientific method
473
00:21:34,250 --> 00:21:36,458
of career guidance using ox guts
474
00:21:36,542 --> 00:21:38,625
was unsatisfactory,
particularly for the ox.
475
00:21:38,709 --> 00:21:39,834
Aah!
476
00:21:40,500 --> 00:21:41,667
You have proven to me
477
00:21:41,750 --> 00:21:44,583
that there's always room
in the modern world
478
00:21:44,667 --> 00:21:47,625
for a reasoning hero, such as yourself.
479
00:21:47,709 --> 00:21:51,417
So, perhaps you'd like
to form a heroics club,
480
00:21:51,500 --> 00:21:53,041
extracurricular, of course?
481
00:21:53,125 --> 00:21:56,041
Aw, that's OK. I get plenty of
hero-training with Phil.
482
00:21:56,125 --> 00:21:58,875
But, um, I, uh, was thinking
483
00:21:58,959 --> 00:22:03,125
a hero should exercise
his brawn and his brain.
484
00:22:03,208 --> 00:22:05,583
So I, heh, I was wondering...
485
00:22:05,667 --> 00:22:09,208
could I work in the library part-time?
486
00:22:09,291 --> 00:22:14,166
Deal. If you'll teach me some of those
totally radical spear tricks.
487
00:22:14,250 --> 00:22:15,500
Ow!
488
00:22:19,542 --> 00:22:20,834
[theme music playing]
34213
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