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♪ Who put the "glad" in gladiator? ♪
2
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♪ Hercules ♪
3
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♪ Whose daring deeds are great theater? ♪
4
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♪ Hercules ♪
5
00:00:16,417 --> 00:00:17,333
♪ Is he bold? ♪
6
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♪ No one braver ♪
7
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♪ Is he sweet? ♪
8
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♪ Our favorite flavor, Hercules ♪
9
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-♪ What a guy ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
10
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-♪ Ask his friends ♪-♪ Hercules ♪
11
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♪ Honey, they won't lie ♪
12
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-♪ Hercules ♪-♪ Ahh, Hercules ♪
13
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♪ Hercules ♪
14
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♪ Hercules ♪
15
00:00:32,040 --> 00:00:33,291
-♪ Come on ♪-♪ No one's fool ♪
16
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♪ Now, the boy's in school ♪
17
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♪ He's in trainin' ♪
18
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♪ Sun is shinin' ♪
19
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♪ And the nicest guy ♪
20
00:00:38,959 --> 00:00:40,750
♪ No complainin' ♪
21
00:00:40,834 --> 00:00:41,917
♪ He was a no one ♪
22
00:00:42,000 --> 00:00:43,583
♪ Zero, zero, give him a quick deed ♪
23
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♪ He's our hero ♪
24
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♪ He's the most likely to succeed ♪
25
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♪ From zero to hero ♪
26
00:00:50,291 --> 00:00:52,417
♪ Herc is a hero ♪
27
00:00:52,500 --> 00:00:57,500
♪ He'll be a hero ♪
28
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Wait and see!
29
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[Bob reading]
30
00:01:07,083 --> 00:01:09,500
Athens, birth place of democracy,
31
00:01:09,583 --> 00:01:12,041
for it was in this ancient city-state
32
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that citizens came togetherto forge their future,
33
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and the leader they chosewas a man named Pericles--
34
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Wise, just, and beloved, for it was he--
35
00:01:22,166 --> 00:01:24,208
Oh, just spit it out!
36
00:01:24,750 --> 00:01:27,375
I am paintinga picture with words.
37
00:01:27,458 --> 00:01:30,625
Mm-hmm. Well, honey,
let's put your words to music
38
00:01:30,709 --> 00:01:32,250
and make it a masterpiece.
39
00:01:32,333 --> 00:01:35,458
Well, I'm no muse, but give me a beat.
40
00:01:35,542 --> 00:01:37,332
[music playing]
41
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♪ He's Pericles ♪
42
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♪ Of Athens ♪
43
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♪ A city planner ♪
44
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♪ Beyond belief ♪
45
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♪ The man ♪
46
00:01:47,208 --> 00:01:49,417
♪ Who makes things happen ♪
47
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♪ The top banana ♪
48
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♪ All hail the chief ♪
49
00:01:53,417 --> 00:01:57,875
[Bob] ♪ An iconOf professional proficiency ♪
50
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[woman] ♪ He's able to untangle any jam ♪
51
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[Bob] ♪ A modelOf unparalleled efficiency ♪
52
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[both] ♪ If you want to get things done ♪
53
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♪ Then he's your best main man ♪
54
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Yeah!
55
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[both] ♪ He's Pericles, the leader ♪
56
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♪ A man of vision ♪
57
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♪ Beyond compare ♪
58
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♪ All hail Pericles of Athens, Greece ♪
59
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♪ The big kahuna ♪
60
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♪ Extraordinaire ♪
61
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OK. Next question.
62
00:02:33,208 --> 00:02:36,500
Uh, over here, sir!
Sir, the name's Bartlett.
63
00:02:36,583 --> 00:02:38,291
I'm with the Greekly World News.
64
00:02:38,375 --> 00:02:40,709
Do you have a new economic policy?
65
00:02:41,709 --> 00:02:43,542
The Athenian economy is booming,
66
00:02:43,625 --> 00:02:47,208
so I say if it's not broke, why fix it?
67
00:02:47,291 --> 00:02:49,291
-Ooh!
-Ooh!
68
00:02:49,375 --> 00:02:52,000
Folksy. That's the kind of wisdom
69
00:02:52,083 --> 00:02:54,083
that's gonna be around for centuries.
70
00:02:54,166 --> 00:02:57,500
Seems to me you shouldn't switch horses
in midstream.
71
00:02:57,583 --> 00:03:01,041
Oh, where does he come up with these?
72
00:03:05,083 --> 00:03:06,250
[sniffing]
73
00:03:06,333 --> 00:03:08,291
I smell a rat.
74
00:03:10,750 --> 00:03:12,834
Bow! Hit the ground!
75
00:03:15,125 --> 00:03:17,959
Ohhh... I feel like I have
one foot in the grave
76
00:03:18,041 --> 00:03:19,625
and the other on a banana peel.
77
00:03:19,709 --> 00:03:22,458
Another good one, sir. Very folksy.
78
00:03:22,542 --> 00:03:25,208
Prepare to eat bronze, punk.
79
00:03:30,917 --> 00:03:32,041
Minister Cleon.
80
00:03:32,125 --> 00:03:35,000
A bloodthirsty rat
is loose in the building.
81
00:03:35,083 --> 00:03:37,333
A man just went out the window
82
00:03:37,417 --> 00:03:39,500
and escaped on a chariot.
83
00:03:39,583 --> 00:03:41,250
How would you describe him?
84
00:03:41,333 --> 00:03:42,792
Bloodthirsty.
85
00:03:42,875 --> 00:03:46,709
I could see it in his rat-like eyes.
86
00:03:46,792 --> 00:03:49,709
That's him.
Blast it. He got away.
87
00:03:49,792 --> 00:03:54,250
I will not rest
until that maggot is behind bars.
88
00:03:54,333 --> 00:03:57,250
City-state trouper Chipacles,
89
00:03:57,333 --> 00:03:59,667
you are a credit to the force.
90
00:04:06,750 --> 00:04:07,750
Wow!
91
00:04:07,834 --> 00:04:09,583
Who is she?
92
00:04:09,667 --> 00:04:12,667
That's Tempest. Handle with care.
93
00:04:12,750 --> 00:04:14,250
W-- Wh-- What do you mean?
94
00:04:14,333 --> 00:04:15,709
[scoffs] Forget about her.
95
00:04:15,792 --> 00:04:18,125
You're saying I don't have a shot?
96
00:04:18,207 --> 00:04:22,291
She an Amazon-- quick-tempered,
antisocial, and prone to violence.
97
00:04:22,375 --> 00:04:24,166
Do the math, Archimedes.
98
00:04:24,250 --> 00:04:26,582
Well, maybe she's just never met
99
00:04:26,667 --> 00:04:28,792
a hero-in-training before.
100
00:04:29,417 --> 00:04:31,082
No! Ohhh... ohhh!
101
00:04:31,166 --> 00:04:32,667
Oomp!
102
00:04:34,792 --> 00:04:37,082
You ruined my concentration.
103
00:04:37,166 --> 00:04:39,500
Oh, sorry, temptress-- uh, Tempest!
104
00:04:39,582 --> 00:04:41,291
I'm-- I'm, uh... I'm Hercules.
105
00:04:46,625 --> 00:04:47,500
[Tempest] Disappointing.
106
00:04:47,582 --> 00:04:49,500
I... pulled it a bit.
107
00:04:49,582 --> 00:04:50,959
You look OK to me.
108
00:04:51,041 --> 00:04:53,250
I-- I mean, it looked OK to me.
109
00:04:53,332 --> 00:04:56,291
Such failure is unacceptable
under combat conditions.
110
00:04:56,375 --> 00:04:58,875
I know an Amazon who made that mistake
and paid the price.
111
00:04:58,959 --> 00:05:01,125
Ooh. What happened?
112
00:05:01,208 --> 00:05:02,959
She lost her left buttock.
113
00:05:03,041 --> 00:05:05,333
Ooh. Pays to practice, I guess.
114
00:05:06,625 --> 00:05:08,125
Hey, don't move.
I'll-- I'll be right back.
115
00:05:08,208 --> 00:05:11,208
Let's practice together.
I-- I've got my junior javelin.
116
00:05:11,291 --> 00:05:13,583
That... Is a child's toy.
117
00:05:13,667 --> 00:05:15,959
No way! T-- This is a training weapon.
118
00:05:16,041 --> 00:05:17,375
You see, I'm... ahem...
119
00:05:17,457 --> 00:05:19,082
[lowers voice] I'm a hero-in-training.
120
00:05:19,166 --> 00:05:21,250
Toy. Child.
121
00:05:23,166 --> 00:05:25,000
Allow me.
122
00:05:26,082 --> 00:05:27,250
Oooaouhh!
123
00:05:28,000 --> 00:05:31,125
Know this, hero-in-training--
I am a warrior!
124
00:05:31,207 --> 00:05:33,166
The only way anyone takes my spear
125
00:05:33,250 --> 00:05:36,207
is point first
through their lifeless torso.
126
00:05:36,291 --> 00:05:38,667
Yeah. Hands off the spears.
Got it.
127
00:05:40,750 --> 00:05:43,875
OK, kid! Target practice time!
128
00:05:43,959 --> 00:05:45,750
Phil... I've been thinking.
129
00:05:45,834 --> 00:05:48,291
That's a child's weapon.
130
00:05:48,375 --> 00:05:50,959
I'm ready for... Spear training.
131
00:05:51,041 --> 00:05:54,792
Whoa, kid. Hero rule number 33,
132
00:05:54,875 --> 00:05:57,250
you gotta crawl before you can walk.
133
00:05:57,332 --> 00:06:00,458
Babies crawl, Phil.
I'm a-- I'm a-- I'm a warrior.
134
00:06:00,917 --> 00:06:02,417
Ha ha ha!
135
00:06:02,500 --> 00:06:04,709
OK, sure. Hey, have it your way.
136
00:06:04,792 --> 00:06:07,125
"Warrior" rule number 33--
137
00:06:07,208 --> 00:06:08,875
Stick with the junior javelin.
138
00:06:08,959 --> 00:06:10,208
[sighs]
139
00:06:19,542 --> 00:06:21,082
-[whinny]
-Oh, d--
140
00:06:22,834 --> 00:06:26,457
[sighs] Hey.
Don't worry, Pegasus.
141
00:06:26,542 --> 00:06:28,207
I'll bring it back as soon as I'm done.
142
00:06:28,291 --> 00:06:29,875
[whinnies]
143
00:06:32,207 --> 00:06:35,457
How was your day, dear?
Did you usurp the government?
144
00:06:36,709 --> 00:06:38,667
No, I did not!
145
00:06:38,750 --> 00:06:41,542
I failed miserably.
146
00:06:41,625 --> 00:06:43,332
Ooh, this could be awkward.
147
00:06:43,417 --> 00:06:46,082
Your, uh, "boss" popped by for dinner.
148
00:06:46,166 --> 00:06:47,500
Pericles?
149
00:06:47,582 --> 00:06:48,667
Here?
150
00:06:48,750 --> 00:06:50,667
No, silly. Your real boss.
151
00:06:52,082 --> 00:06:54,207
Aah! Ares!
152
00:06:54,291 --> 00:06:56,792
O mighty God of War
153
00:06:56,875 --> 00:06:59,082
and overlord of Sparta...
154
00:06:59,750 --> 00:07:03,917
Honey, bow before Ares!
155
00:07:04,000 --> 00:07:07,375
Oh, I'd love to, but that mutton
isn't going to roast itself.
156
00:07:07,458 --> 00:07:10,875
Oh! Don't forget my favorite,
the stuffed grape leaves.
157
00:07:10,959 --> 00:07:13,959
I've gotta get that recipe.
Anyway. Cleon!
158
00:07:14,583 --> 00:07:17,082
The plan was so simple. You kill Pericles.
159
00:07:17,166 --> 00:07:18,542
My Spartan army invades Athens.
160
00:07:18,625 --> 00:07:20,625
I appoint you the new leader of Athens.
161
00:07:20,709 --> 00:07:24,667
Which we agreed to rename Cleonopolis.
162
00:07:24,750 --> 00:07:28,250
What?
I want Athens.
163
00:07:28,332 --> 00:07:29,709
[Athena] Ares?
164
00:07:29,792 --> 00:07:31,041
Gotta go.
165
00:07:32,625 --> 00:07:34,250
Athena!
166
00:07:34,332 --> 00:07:35,375
Hi, sis!
167
00:07:35,457 --> 00:07:38,959
Were you meddling
in Athenian affairs again?
168
00:07:41,125 --> 00:07:43,375
Please. Give me a break.
169
00:07:43,417 --> 00:07:46,500
Like I care about your stupid city-state.
170
00:07:47,917 --> 00:07:49,542
Yo! Tempest!
171
00:07:51,041 --> 00:07:52,250
Ha ha-- ooh! Ahh!
172
00:07:52,332 --> 00:07:54,207
Ha ha. Ow.
173
00:07:54,291 --> 00:07:56,166
Hmm. Yours?
174
00:07:56,250 --> 00:07:58,082
Well, as a matter of fact...
175
00:07:58,166 --> 00:08:00,583
40 millimeter Carthaginian
bronze tip.
176
00:08:00,667 --> 00:08:03,208
Slices through cartilage like it's humus.
177
00:08:03,291 --> 00:08:04,625
Nice.
178
00:08:05,542 --> 00:08:07,542
Yeah, and the, uh, handle is, uh...
179
00:08:07,625 --> 00:08:08,458
Wood.
180
00:08:09,625 --> 00:08:10,917
Ooh! I-- ahh...
181
00:08:11,000 --> 00:08:11,959
Prove yourself.
182
00:08:13,291 --> 00:08:14,875
You-- You mean a-- actually throw it?
183
00:08:14,959 --> 00:08:17,917
Just as I thought. Child!
184
00:08:18,000 --> 00:08:19,207
Am not!
185
00:08:25,250 --> 00:08:26,082
Aah!
186
00:08:29,000 --> 00:08:32,750
Children should stick to their toys.
187
00:08:32,834 --> 00:08:34,332
Ohhh...
188
00:08:34,417 --> 00:08:36,000
Any more questions?
189
00:08:36,082 --> 00:08:38,082
Are you planning to cancel
any upcoming activities
190
00:08:38,165 --> 00:08:40,250
in light of the recent attempt
on your life?
191
00:08:40,332 --> 00:08:44,125
If that assassin thinks he can scare
this humble civil servant,
192
00:08:44,207 --> 00:08:48,125
well, let's just say it's not the size
of the dog in the fight,
193
00:08:48,208 --> 00:08:50,375
It's the size of the fight in the dog.
194
00:08:50,458 --> 00:08:51,542
Ah!
195
00:08:51,625 --> 00:08:53,458
Is that on the record?
196
00:08:53,542 --> 00:08:56,125
Yes, Bartlett. You can quote me on that.
197
00:08:56,875 --> 00:08:58,208
Spear!
198
00:08:58,290 --> 00:09:01,291
Oh, great. I had him in my sights.
199
00:09:04,750 --> 00:09:05,709
Bingo.
200
00:09:05,792 --> 00:09:08,250
"Property of Phil's Gym."
201
00:09:08,333 --> 00:09:09,583
Phil.
202
00:09:10,500 --> 00:09:11,834
Phil.
203
00:09:11,917 --> 00:09:12,917
Aah!
204
00:09:13,000 --> 00:09:14,083
Philoctetes!
205
00:09:16,583 --> 00:09:17,458
[snoring]
206
00:09:17,542 --> 00:09:20,542
[Chipacles] Rise and shine, Mr. Phil.
207
00:09:20,625 --> 00:09:22,166
[snorts] Uhh! Wha--
208
00:09:22,250 --> 00:09:23,750
You're under arrest.
209
00:09:24,458 --> 00:09:25,667
You got the wrong satyr!
210
00:09:25,750 --> 00:09:27,750
Tell it to the judge, goat man.
211
00:09:27,834 --> 00:09:30,500
What's goin' on?
Why are you arresting Phil?
212
00:09:30,583 --> 00:09:33,000
This lawn-chomping degenerate's the perp.
213
00:09:33,083 --> 00:09:35,875
-The perp?
-Perpetrator. The assassin.
214
00:09:35,959 --> 00:09:39,000
The scum who tried to kill Pericles.
215
00:09:39,083 --> 00:09:41,500
You are one deluded flatfoot.
216
00:09:41,583 --> 00:09:44,375
Am I, smart guy? Maybe I just imagined
217
00:09:44,458 --> 00:09:47,667
that our beloved leader
almost got ventilated with this.
218
00:09:47,750 --> 00:09:51,542
Come on! There must be thousands of spears
like that.
219
00:09:51,625 --> 00:09:55,040
40 millimeter with a little
carthaginian tip chaser?
220
00:09:55,125 --> 00:09:57,083
All right. Hundreds.
221
00:09:57,165 --> 00:09:58,583
"Property of Phil's Gym"?
222
00:09:58,667 --> 00:10:00,792
Hey, that's mine!
223
00:10:00,875 --> 00:10:02,875
Aha! A confession.
224
00:10:02,959 --> 00:10:05,083
This case is wrapping up nice and neat.
225
00:10:05,166 --> 00:10:06,542
No! I meant--
226
00:10:06,625 --> 00:10:08,834
Wait. You've got it all wrong!
227
00:10:08,917 --> 00:10:11,208
Clam up, junior, before I run you in
228
00:10:11,291 --> 00:10:13,417
as an accessory to the crime.
229
00:10:13,500 --> 00:10:15,291
You don't understand!
230
00:10:15,375 --> 00:10:16,792
I'm not the accessory!
231
00:10:17,917 --> 00:10:19,375
I'm the perp.
232
00:10:26,250 --> 00:10:30,208
[Chipacles] The would-be assassin
has been identified as one Philoctetes,
233
00:10:30,291 --> 00:10:32,083
AKA... "Phil."
234
00:10:32,165 --> 00:10:34,917
I think this mug shot tells the tale.
235
00:10:35,000 --> 00:10:36,333
[slurps]
236
00:10:36,417 --> 00:10:37,583
Ahh.
237
00:10:37,667 --> 00:10:41,375
Neighbors describe the suspect
as a grass-eating loner.
238
00:10:41,458 --> 00:10:42,792
-Aah!
-Ooh!
239
00:10:43,458 --> 00:10:45,542
Sorry. Only Mr. Philoctetes' lawyer
240
00:10:45,625 --> 00:10:47,250
Is permitted to see him.
241
00:10:47,333 --> 00:10:50,458
Ah. Well, the fact of the matter is,
my good man,
242
00:10:50,542 --> 00:10:52,542
that I am Mr. Philoctetes' lawyer,
243
00:10:52,625 --> 00:10:55,333
and this is my lovely co-counsel.
244
00:10:55,417 --> 00:10:56,500
Yii!
245
00:10:58,375 --> 00:11:00,291
You're a lawyer?
246
00:11:00,375 --> 00:11:03,792
But of course! I've handled
many high-profile cases,
247
00:11:03,875 --> 00:11:04,750
like, uh...
248
00:11:04,834 --> 00:11:07,542
Your Deluded MindVS. The State Of Reality?
249
00:11:07,625 --> 00:11:09,625
Right! Big one!
250
00:11:09,709 --> 00:11:11,500
Landmark!
251
00:11:12,333 --> 00:11:14,083
The appeal is still pending.
252
00:11:14,750 --> 00:11:16,083
You gotta get me outta here.
253
00:11:16,166 --> 00:11:17,417
I'm half wild goat.
254
00:11:17,500 --> 00:11:19,625
We don't do so hot in captivity!
255
00:11:19,709 --> 00:11:21,834
Don't get your fur in a bunch.
256
00:11:21,917 --> 00:11:24,834
Hercules is gonna straighten out
the whole thing.
257
00:11:24,917 --> 00:11:27,667
So the spear just slipped
outta your hands...
258
00:11:27,750 --> 00:11:30,625
Oops... and flies halfway
across the city-state?
259
00:11:30,709 --> 00:11:31,959
Yeah.
260
00:11:32,040 --> 00:11:35,875
My friend,
that would be one magic spear.
261
00:11:35,959 --> 00:11:39,208
Uh, well, actually,
it's more me than the spear.
262
00:11:39,290 --> 00:11:41,583
So you'll drop the charges
against Phil?
263
00:11:42,875 --> 00:11:44,875
[Chipacles] And stay out.
264
00:11:45,959 --> 00:11:49,290
You spend far too much of your time
on the ground.
265
00:11:49,375 --> 00:11:51,959
Tempest. What are you doing here?
266
00:11:52,040 --> 00:11:53,917
I heard about your goat master.
267
00:11:54,000 --> 00:11:55,500
And you feel bad?
268
00:11:55,583 --> 00:11:57,583
I feel nothing!
269
00:11:58,333 --> 00:12:00,583
Warriors have no use for emotions.
270
00:12:00,667 --> 00:12:04,458
But my code of honor states
that I must set this injustice right.
271
00:12:04,542 --> 00:12:05,875
Where you goin'?
272
00:12:05,959 --> 00:12:07,458
To catch the real assassin.
273
00:12:07,542 --> 00:12:10,834
The hunter shall become the hunted.
274
00:12:10,917 --> 00:12:12,667
All right! Well, count me in.
275
00:12:13,375 --> 00:12:16,166
[horses neighing]
276
00:12:21,333 --> 00:12:22,291
All clear.
277
00:12:25,417 --> 00:12:27,834
[squeaking]
278
00:12:32,542 --> 00:12:35,375
Be alert for anything suspicious.
279
00:12:35,458 --> 00:12:37,458
Keep your eyes open.
280
00:12:37,542 --> 00:12:38,792
Yeah. No problem. I--
281
00:12:38,875 --> 00:12:40,625
And your mouth shut!
282
00:12:47,000 --> 00:12:50,208
How am I supposed to get at Pericles now?
283
00:12:56,500 --> 00:12:57,417
[neighing]
284
00:12:57,500 --> 00:13:00,333
Does this answer your question?
285
00:13:00,417 --> 00:13:02,959
Ooh! What kind of mileage
does this thing get?
286
00:13:03,041 --> 00:13:05,000
[neighs]
287
00:13:05,083 --> 00:13:06,667
Will you just get out there?
288
00:13:06,750 --> 00:13:08,000
[neighs]
289
00:13:11,917 --> 00:13:14,917
Knock 'em dead. And I mean that...
literally!
290
00:13:15,000 --> 00:13:16,834
Ha ha ha ha ha!
291
00:13:16,917 --> 00:13:18,625
And I'd like to point out,
Your Honor,
292
00:13:18,709 --> 00:13:20,667
that the evidence against my client
293
00:13:20,750 --> 00:13:23,959
is largely circumstantial.
294
00:13:24,041 --> 00:13:25,333
Not bad.
295
00:13:25,458 --> 00:13:27,000
Not yet.
296
00:13:30,250 --> 00:13:32,083
No sign of suspicious activity.
297
00:13:32,165 --> 00:13:33,667
[screaming]
298
00:13:35,458 --> 00:13:36,834
[neighs]
299
00:13:39,333 --> 00:13:40,667
Except for that.
300
00:13:48,083 --> 00:13:50,375
Sniff upholstery, sir.
301
00:13:58,208 --> 00:14:00,000
[neighs]
302
00:14:02,667 --> 00:14:04,500
Go!
303
00:14:04,583 --> 00:14:07,458
I think I've made my case
crystal clear,
304
00:14:07,542 --> 00:14:10,792
Your Honor. Res ipse loquitor.
305
00:14:10,875 --> 00:14:12,917
Habeas corpus.
306
00:14:13,000 --> 00:14:14,917
What is that gibberish?
307
00:14:15,000 --> 00:14:19,375
Latin-- the word spoken
on the street, Baby.
308
00:14:20,458 --> 00:14:23,041
Guilty!
The goat man goes back to lockup.
309
00:14:23,583 --> 00:14:25,125
Back... to lockup?
310
00:14:25,208 --> 00:14:27,875
Now it's official. You're doomed.
311
00:14:27,959 --> 00:14:29,875
They can't pin this rap on me!
312
00:14:29,959 --> 00:14:31,166
Yaahh! Uhh!
313
00:14:31,250 --> 00:14:33,458
Eeeyyyeee! Euuhhh!
314
00:14:33,542 --> 00:14:35,000
Oooohhh!
315
00:14:35,083 --> 00:14:36,290
Eeeyeeee!
316
00:14:36,375 --> 00:14:38,500
Beuuhhhh!
317
00:14:38,667 --> 00:14:40,709
[roaring and fighting]
318
00:14:40,792 --> 00:14:43,417
Yaaahhh!
319
00:14:43,500 --> 00:14:45,458
Bluuuhhhh!
320
00:14:45,542 --> 00:14:47,375
-Grrrr!
-OK, as your attorney,
321
00:14:47,458 --> 00:14:50,625
I must advise against this behavior.
322
00:14:51,375 --> 00:14:52,583
Euhh! Euhh! Euhh!
323
00:14:52,667 --> 00:14:53,917
Eeeyeee eeeyeee! Eeeyeee!
324
00:15:03,959 --> 00:15:05,458
[horse neighs]
325
00:15:23,000 --> 00:15:24,250
Huh?
326
00:15:29,375 --> 00:15:30,750
Where you goin'?
327
00:15:30,834 --> 00:15:31,750
Shortcut.
328
00:15:34,834 --> 00:15:36,750
[horse neighs]
329
00:15:36,834 --> 00:15:37,917
[hoofbeats]
330
00:15:38,709 --> 00:15:40,333
-Aah!
-Aah!
331
00:15:42,583 --> 00:15:45,709
[Hercules] C-- Comin' through! I'm sorry.
332
00:15:51,290 --> 00:15:52,165
[gasps]
333
00:15:55,208 --> 00:15:56,083
Aah!
334
00:16:18,250 --> 00:16:19,792
Watch this!
335
00:16:35,458 --> 00:16:37,542
[horses neighing]
336
00:16:37,625 --> 00:16:39,917
You fool! You-- ohh!
337
00:16:40,000 --> 00:16:42,417
Stand still while I berate you!
338
00:16:42,500 --> 00:16:45,625
Pericles, sir, that attack happened
while Phil was locked up!
339
00:16:45,709 --> 00:16:47,125
That proves he's innocent.
340
00:16:47,208 --> 00:16:49,792
Hmm. The proof is in the pudding.
341
00:16:49,875 --> 00:16:52,500
Phil is an upright, law-abiding citizen.
342
00:16:52,583 --> 00:16:54,125
He wouldn't hurt a fly.
343
00:16:54,208 --> 00:16:56,208
[Phil] Yaaahhh!
344
00:16:56,290 --> 00:16:58,542
Who wants some of this?
345
00:16:58,625 --> 00:17:00,542
You're goin' down, punk.
346
00:17:01,875 --> 00:17:04,208
Fool me once, shame on you.
347
00:17:04,290 --> 00:17:06,959
Fool me twice, shame on me.
348
00:17:07,040 --> 00:17:09,250
Uh... I'm not sure I follow.
349
00:17:09,375 --> 00:17:10,500
[bleating]
350
00:17:10,583 --> 00:17:12,040
Translation--
351
00:17:12,125 --> 00:17:14,333
Execution at dawn.
352
00:17:21,916 --> 00:17:24,125
[rooster crows]
353
00:17:24,959 --> 00:17:28,375
Philoctetes,
you have been found guilty
354
00:17:28,458 --> 00:17:30,834
of the attempted assassination
355
00:17:30,917 --> 00:17:34,000
of our beloved Pericles.
356
00:17:34,083 --> 00:17:36,208
Icarus and Cassandra,
357
00:17:36,291 --> 00:17:40,041
you have been found guilty
of aiding and abetting
358
00:17:40,125 --> 00:17:44,875
the attempted assassination
of our beloved Pericles.
359
00:17:46,500 --> 00:17:48,917
Any last requests?
360
00:17:49,000 --> 00:17:50,959
Yes. I request the opportunity
361
00:17:51,041 --> 00:17:54,041
to recite a love poem I wrote
for my Sweet Cassandra.
362
00:17:54,166 --> 00:17:57,417
Ahem.
I request you gag him immediately.
363
00:17:57,500 --> 00:17:59,792
[chuckles] Your gallows humor.
364
00:17:59,917 --> 00:18:01,875
So apropos to this moment.
365
00:18:01,959 --> 00:18:03,166
[chuckles]
366
00:18:04,166 --> 00:18:06,875
I'm not sure what to say
to such criminals
367
00:18:06,959 --> 00:18:10,250
except if you play with fire,
you're gonna get burned.
368
00:18:10,333 --> 00:18:12,709
[cheering]
369
00:18:12,792 --> 00:18:15,083
-[man] Bravo!
-[whinnying]
370
00:18:15,166 --> 00:18:16,583
[Phil] Kid!
371
00:18:24,417 --> 00:18:26,375
I knew I should've run you in.
372
00:18:28,458 --> 00:18:30,375
Chipacles, you-- you have to believe me!
373
00:18:30,458 --> 00:18:32,166
Phil isn't the real assassin.
374
00:18:32,291 --> 00:18:35,208
Spare me the fairy tale, punk.
375
00:18:39,375 --> 00:18:41,625
That boy's madder
than a 2-stingered wasp.
376
00:18:41,709 --> 00:18:44,041
What does that even mean?
377
00:18:44,125 --> 00:18:46,542
Careful. You could've hurt me with that.
378
00:18:46,625 --> 00:18:49,542
Well, that's the idea.
379
00:18:50,291 --> 00:18:51,417
Pericles!
380
00:18:51,500 --> 00:18:53,083
If I were you,
381
00:18:53,166 --> 00:18:57,041
I'd be as nervous as Medusa
382
00:18:57,125 --> 00:18:59,875
in a hall of mirrors.
383
00:18:59,959 --> 00:19:02,375
That one just doesn't feel timeless.
384
00:19:02,458 --> 00:19:03,834
[Tempest] [grunts]
385
00:19:05,750 --> 00:19:07,291
Ahh, still pulled it a bit.
386
00:19:07,375 --> 00:19:09,041
Great Ares, God of War!
387
00:19:09,125 --> 00:19:10,917
Help me!
388
00:19:11,792 --> 00:19:13,542
Oh, what now?
389
00:19:13,625 --> 00:19:17,291
You're so good at treason,
but so bad at murder.
390
00:19:17,959 --> 00:19:19,291
Cleon?
391
00:19:19,375 --> 00:19:21,041
The real assassin.
392
00:19:23,125 --> 00:19:24,333
OK.
393
00:19:24,417 --> 00:19:25,542
[thunderclaps]
394
00:19:37,333 --> 00:19:39,500
Ooh, nice!
395
00:19:39,583 --> 00:19:40,875
Thank you.
396
00:19:40,959 --> 00:19:42,959
Look, wreak havoc.
397
00:19:43,041 --> 00:19:44,625
That'll be thanks enough.
398
00:19:46,959 --> 00:19:49,166
[people screaming]
399
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:54,333
Tuck and roll, sir.
400
00:19:57,583 --> 00:20:00,583
Cleon, I'm going to have to ask you
to surrender now.
401
00:20:01,000 --> 00:20:03,583
Hmm. Uh, well...
402
00:20:03,667 --> 00:20:04,583
No.
403
00:20:08,750 --> 00:20:10,542
Uhh... uhh!
404
00:20:12,000 --> 00:20:14,333
What is so fascinating that you--
405
00:20:14,375 --> 00:20:15,625
[gasps]
406
00:20:15,709 --> 00:20:18,917
So you are meddling
in Athenian affairs!
407
00:20:19,041 --> 00:20:20,375
Do you mind?
408
00:20:20,458 --> 00:20:21,959
The fight's just getting good.
409
00:20:23,750 --> 00:20:25,000
Hercules!
410
00:20:25,083 --> 00:20:26,667
Uhh! Uhh!
411
00:20:28,959 --> 00:20:32,709
[Athena] Choose any weapon,
and it shall be yours.
412
00:20:32,792 --> 00:20:34,125
Who's that?
413
00:20:34,208 --> 00:20:36,375
A spear! Be a warrior!
414
00:20:36,458 --> 00:20:37,959
Oh! A pen!
415
00:20:38,041 --> 00:20:41,125
The pen is mightier than the sword.
416
00:20:41,208 --> 00:20:42,542
Ehh ehh ehh!
417
00:20:42,625 --> 00:20:44,875
Hey! I like that one.
418
00:20:44,959 --> 00:20:48,041
Kid, remember hero rule
number 33!
419
00:20:48,125 --> 00:20:52,375
Right. I'll take... A junior javelin.
420
00:20:52,458 --> 00:20:53,875
[crowd gasping]
421
00:20:57,834 --> 00:20:59,417
[thunderclaps]
422
00:20:59,500 --> 00:21:03,041
Ho ho! He's got to be kidding!
Ho ho ho!
423
00:21:03,125 --> 00:21:06,875
The kid's makin' this too easy!
424
00:21:06,959 --> 00:21:08,458
Hoo hoo hoo!
425
00:21:16,417 --> 00:21:17,917
Yaahhh!
426
00:21:22,417 --> 00:21:24,166
You missed!
427
00:21:24,500 --> 00:21:25,917
No, I didn't.
428
00:21:26,667 --> 00:21:29,041
Whoa! Oooff! Ohhh...
429
00:21:29,166 --> 00:21:31,333
-Aah! Ooh!
-[smash]
430
00:21:32,250 --> 00:21:33,959
-Hooray!
-Hooray!
431
00:21:34,041 --> 00:21:35,959
[cheering]
432
00:21:36,041 --> 00:21:37,542
-Yeah!
-Yeah!
433
00:21:37,625 --> 00:21:40,208
Yes! Athens is number one.
434
00:21:40,291 --> 00:21:42,625
♪ Athens is number one ♪
435
00:21:42,709 --> 00:21:45,041
[Ares] Oh, put a sock in it.
436
00:21:45,333 --> 00:21:46,417
[cheering]
437
00:21:46,500 --> 00:21:48,083
Ya did it, kid!
438
00:21:48,166 --> 00:21:50,542
This is an Amazon spear.
439
00:21:50,667 --> 00:21:53,750
Only the bravest warriors may touch it.
440
00:21:53,834 --> 00:21:56,291
Today you've earned that right.
441
00:21:58,041 --> 00:21:59,917
Uh, no, thanks.
442
00:22:00,041 --> 00:22:02,250
I have to crawl before I can walk.
443
00:22:02,333 --> 00:22:04,625
That's hero rule number 33.
444
00:22:04,709 --> 00:22:07,125
Hey, uh, you want to get some lunch?
445
00:22:07,208 --> 00:22:08,667
My treat.
446
00:22:08,750 --> 00:22:13,000
I eat only the meat I hunt
and kill with my bare hands.
447
00:22:13,417 --> 00:22:14,834
Yeah.
448
00:22:14,917 --> 00:22:16,166
Well, we can go dutch.
449
00:22:21,208 --> 00:22:22,792
[theme music playing]
30347
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