All language subtitles for 06. The Lighter Side Of Angela Matusa

( theme song playing )

Come on, Alex,
it'll be fun.

No, no, no, Tony,

I don't want to play
softball against
the day shift.

They got a lot of
great guys on that team.

They're gonna kill us.

Alex, they put on their pants
one leg at a time just like us.

Well, If they want to
have pants-putting-on
contest, I'm in.

Come on, Alex, it'll be fun.

Please? Please,
please, please.
No.

Okay, okay, Tony, look, if, if
my plans fall apart on Saturday

and I have
nothing better to do,

and I, uh, feel in the mood
to be humiliated,

I might just drop by.

We've got Alex.
Oh, come on.

Rieger, I got a message for ya.

All right,
here's your buck.

Thank you.

Message, message, Rieger, yeah.

Here you go,
right here.

"Phil called-- everything's
ready for Thursday."

Phil called...?

Hey, wait a minute,
I don't understand this.

I don't even know a Phil.

You want the message explained,
it'll cost you another buck.

All right, here's a buck--
explain.

All right.

Ah, the explanation is
I gave you the wrong message.

Hey.

Yours will cost you
another dollar.

But... I'll put it on your tab.

Hey, guys,
guess who called?

Who?
Angela Matusa.

Angela Matusa,
you remember her

from about a year ago.

She used to work for
Bobby's answering service.

Come on,
you guys met her.

Nice kid, great sense
of humor... fat.

Angela!
Oh, Angela!

Yeah.

I remember her.

Big Angie Matusa,

the apartment
house with legs.

Hey, Tone, she'd make a great
catcher for your baseball team.

That dame could cover the plate,
the umpire and the sun.

You say she's
coming here, Rieger?

I'll prepare for her arrival.

Open the loading docks!

That's okay, Alex,
everybody does their own thing.

Some men climb mountains,
others date 'em.

Hey, Louie, cage time.

Oh, I think I'm gonna
write these bon mots down,

before I forget them.

Oh, for crying out loud.

Don't worry, Alex,

you'll not hear another
witty remark from me

until she gets here.

( imitating thundering
footsteps )

Lock up the candy machine.

Hey, Alex, you keep telling us
how terrific she is,

but all I can remember is
she was big and mean.

Well, she was at first.

I couldn't get through to her.

I remember
our first date, though.

We ate at Mario's.

The evening just fell apart.

Why don't you drop
the act now, huh?

What? What act?

Pretending you're not having
a lousy time.

Hey, come on, Angela.
What the...?

What do you still got
your coat on for?

The management requested it.

Don't you care for your salad?

I wouldn't know if
I cared for it or not;

I didn't eat it.

Hey, now, what's with you?

Look, you don't have
to bother seeing me home.

No, no, no.
I'll take you. I'll take you.

No, really I'm one of
the few women in New York

who's safe
on the streets.

Hey, now, now, come on.

You... you came with me,
you're leaving with me.

Listen, let's not spoil
a lovely evening

by arguing, okay?

And, hey, don't worry,

you did your duty;
you proved you
we're a nice guy.

Hey, I-I'm taking you.

Get your paws off me.

They give you a little dinner,

they think
they own you.

Yeah, she was really down on
herself because of her weight.

But we became good friends.

You know, I mean...

Ah, but then about six months
later, she, uh... we lost touch.

She stopped answering
my phone calls and, uh...

Hey, listen, uh...

She's very sensitive about this,

so, uh, when
she gets here

please don't mention
anything about weight, okay?

Okay.

Please?

Hi, Alex.

Angela!

My God, you lost a ton!

The only thing that could
spoil this moment

if Cheryl Tiegs was standing
behind me.

Hey, Bob!
Yeah.

You remember
Angela?

Holy cow!

You look terrific.
Oh!

It's some kind of
miracle or something.

How much did you lose?

About a hundred pounds.

I have a ways to go,
but I'm still trying.

A hundred pounds!
Whoa.

How'd you do it?

Oh, this doctor put me
on a special diet.

He said I could eat anything
as long as it wasn't food.

ALEX:
Hey, Angela,

you look sensational.
Yeah.

You don't know how many pounds
I've waited

to hear somebody say that.

I joined this weight group

and it's really changing
my life--

new hairdo, new clothes,
new job.

I did save one
of my old dresses, though.

Yeah, for old
times' sake?

Nah, I throw it over my car
when it rains.

LOUIE:
Ahoy, there!

Has anyone seen anything
of the great white whale?

Great white whale, that's funny.

ALEX:
Uh... Uh...

Louie...

Louie.
Uh, Louie, Louie,

I'd like you
to meet someone, okay?

Louie, this
is Angela.

She's not
so fat.

He was going
to hit you

with a whole bunch
of fat jokes.

Hey, Louie,
congratulate her.

She lost 100 pounds.

Well, it's really great
that you lost all that weight.

You should be very proud
of yourself.

Thank you.

But, hey,
if you ever bloat up again,

come and see me.

It's nice you brought
me here again, Alex.

Well, I figured we had
such fun here last time.

Okay, decided yet?

Oh, sure..., uh, Angela?

Uh, let me just calculate
my calories here.

Uh, let's see.

I'll have, uh,
chicken, no skin;

broccoli, no butter;

salad, no dressing;
and no dessert.

Well, uh, that sounds
pretty good.

Oh, excuse me.
Wait a minute.

Hey, Alex, do you want me
to have a good time?

Yeah.

Then order
what you'd normally have.

I can handle it, honest.

Yeah?
Yeah.

Okay.

Okay, Tommy, I'll have, um...

salad, Thousand Island dressing,

Veal Marsala,

linguini in clam sauce,
( clicking )

and, uh,
garlic bread.

Oh, my God. Oh, I'm s...

Oh, that's right.
That's too much, right?
No, it's...

Make the salad dressing
Hundred Island.

( laughing )

Hey, Angela, I hope
you don't get too tired

of hearing how great you look.

Are you kidding?
Huh?

I'm loving all this attention
I'm getting.

You know what happened
to me the other day?

What?

I, Angela Matusa,
got whistled at

for the first time in my life.

Whoo!
Hey, that's neat.

I bet you were a little
embarrassed, though, right?

Yeah, and frustrated.

I chased him six blocks
and lost him in an alley.

I really admire what you're
doing, you know that?

I mean, I know how hard it is
to kick a tough habit.

I quit smoking.
Yeah?

Yep. Well, I'm telling you,

there was a time when I never
thought I'd be able to say

"I haven't smoked
for ten years."

It can be done.

I'm telling you it can be done.

All it takes is
a little, uh, confidence

and, um, another nine years.

( chuckles )

I know what you mean.

I tried dieting lots of times,
and it never took.

I guess I just didn't have
enough motivation.

And then suddenly I found a key.

Funny, it was there
all the time.

What was it?

Men.

Men?

You're right, we were
here all that time.

Well, not really men--

one particular man
I wanted to attract.

He was nice to me.

He treated me like a person,

even when I wasn't feeling
like one.

That sounds like one great guy.

He sure is.

Um, um...

( stammering )

Hey, Alex, tell me something.

Yeah, what?

Could you ever have

those kind of feelings for me?

Those feelings?

( chuckles uncomfortably )

Angela, come on.

This is not a simple thing,
you know.

I mean, uh... look, uh, here's
what we're going to do, okay?

This is what we're going to do.

Let's just, um, um...

No, no, on second thought,
let's, uh, um...

Look, Angela, wait a minute,
I got it, this is it.

Look, why don't we just
go out a couple of times

and, uh, you know,
get to know each other better

and then, uh, maybe go out again
and see what happens.

I mean, uh, see what develops.

How does that sound?

Hey, Alex, aren't you just
saying this

because I put you on the spot

and you're afraid
of hurting my feelings?

Yeah.

Okay, how about Friday night?

No, wait, look, look, maybe...

maybe we shouldn't.

Look, it's a terrible habit of
mine not being able to say no,

and I-I think I should
start sometime.

Well, start tomorrow.

No!

Oh, Angela, I...
Angela, I'm really sorry.

I, um...

Hey, Alex, don't worry about it.

Angela, I'm really
sorry about this.

I mean,
I feel terrible.

Uh, Alex, don't.

I mean, it's because
of your help

that I lost
100 pounds.

And, uh, maybe there'll be
another guy.

And if I can lose 100 pounds
for you,

maybe I can lose 150 for
somebody with a better nose.

Uh, listen,
uh, you want to leave?

No, I want you
to leave.

What?

I just want to sit here, Alex,
and collect my thoughts.

Are you sure?

Yeah, I'm sure,
it's what I want.

I, um...

You know, I just wish once we
could leave this place together.

Here we go...

boneless, skinless
chicken and broccoli,

Veal Marsala and linguini
and clams and garlic bread.

( sighs )

What do you say, Elaine--

Saturday morning,
fresh air, sunshine?

I'll put you in
right field, I promise.

Oh, Tony, I didn't tell
you, but my grandparents

are coming in from
Buffalo this weekend.

Great.
That's my outfield.

Grandma's in center,
Grandpa's playing left.

All right, Bobby,
what do you want to play?

Oh T-Tony, listen, how many
times do I got to tell you?

I'm a lousy baseball player.

You don't want me on your team.

I-I can't even catch a ball.

Listen, listen, listen.

There's plenty of
time before Saturday.

I'll give you
a few pointers.

Come on. We'll throw
this around.

I'll straighten
you out. Come on.

Okay,
but it's pointless, Tony.

That's all right.
Come on.

Try and grab this one.
You ready?

All right, here we go, whoa.

See, I stink. I told you.

What do you mean?

So far, you're the only
guy in the garage

who knew enough
to bend over.

Congratulations,
you're my shortstop.

Excuse me, I'm looking
for Alex Rieger.

He's not here yet.

Wait a minute.

You're fat.

Just a second.

What did I do
with that list?

Now, don't waddle
away-- I'll find it.

Hey, look, all I want to do
is talk to Alex Rieger.

Keep your tent on.

I can't find it--
I had some great things.

You're so fat,

you probably heard
them all anyway.

I prefer to think of myself
as portly.

Did you say
"portly" or
"porky"?

( laughing )

What do I need
a list for?

I'm gold.

You guys hear that--
portly, porky?

Hey, Rieger,

el battleshippo
wants to talk to you.

Hi, I'm Alex Rieger.

Uh, I'm sorry about Louie.

Yeah, I'm not too
thrilled with him either.

I'm Wayne Hubbard.

I'd like to talk to you
about Angela Matusa.

She's a friend of mine.

Angela? Why?

Wha-wha...
Is something wrong?

Yeah, I'm afraid so.
See, we'd always go

to the weight control meetings
together.

Yeah.

And on the way home

we usually stop off for a cup
of coffee-- no cream or sugar.

Oh.

I look forward to it
all week long.

ALEX:
Oh, that's nice.

Uh, yeah, she's a great girl,
isn't she?

Why do you say
something's wrong?

HUBBARD:
Well, she called
me tonight

and she said
she wasn't going.

Well, maybe she
doesn't feel well.

No, no. She hasn't missed
a meeting in, in six months.

Oh.

Are those almonds?

Peanuts.

You want to talk
over here?

Wh-wh-what is it?

Look, she's, uh, she thinks
a lot of you, Angela,

because we're
always talking

and she always brings up
your name.

And, uh...
Mm.

That's why I came here,
I hope, I hope you don't mind.

No, it's fine.

Oh, barbecued flavor?

Uh, uh, Wayne, Wayne, uh,
why did you say something...

Wayne, Wayne, Wayne, Wayne...

Why do you say
something is wrong?

When I talked to
her on the phone,

she was, uh,
really down.

And usually
when she's depressed

I can talk to her
and joke with her

and pick up her spirits.

Yeah?
But it didn't work.

Yeah, I know how that is.

Uh, y-you seem to know her
quite well.

Yeah, I haven't
admitted it to anybody,

but, uh, I'm really
crazy about her.

Oh, yeah?
Yeah.

Well, why, why don't you
go to her apartment

and talk to her?

I don't think she's home.

Huh?

'Cause while I was talking
to her on the phone,

in the background,

I think I heard the faint
clattering of cutlery.

Restaurant?

Food, very bad.

Listen, we got to find her.

I'll get my coat;
I'll be right with you.

Okay, uh, I'll get my car

and pick you
up out front.

Hey, where should
we look?

I don't know. We'll split up,

and we'll check all the
restaurants in her neighborhood.

Okay.

I called a few that
she used to like,

and either she wasn't
eating there

or maybe she's eating
under an assumed name.

Alex, excuse me.
I'm sorry.

I couldn't help
but overhear.

No, no, I got
to go Elaine. I got to go.

Are you sure you want
to get involved in this?

Of course I do.
Wouldn't you?

Well, Alex, can I talk
to you a minute?

Huh?

I just hope that, uh,

that you're not gonna be
too disappointed

if there's nothing
you can do to help Angela.

I mean, some people
just can't be helped.

What are you
talking about?

I refuse to believe that.

LOUIE:
Hey, Alex.

Your friend's
waiting for you outside.

Yeah, I know.
Thanks.

You can't miss him.

He's the guy
wearing the Plymouth.

Hey, Angela, I was looking
all over town for you.

Never thought I'd find
you in a dump like this.

Sorry.

Go away, Alex.

Look, Angela,

I know I'm not

your favorite person right now.

I don't want
to talk to you, Alex.

You know, I have every right
to feel upset right now.

I mean, you put me
in a great spot.
You know that?

It's like every bite
you're taking is my fault.

Oh, Alex,
don't blame yourself.

It's got nothing
to do with you.

Ah...

It's my problem.

I should be used
to it by now.

I've had it for as long
as I can remember.

You know, I wasn't even
invited to my senior prom.

Big surprise?

But I was too embarrassed
to tell my parents,

so I lied to them.

I told them I had a date.

The theme was "Three
Coins in a Fountain."

And they had
a real live fountain

right in the middle
of the gym floor.

And you know where I was, Alex?

I was standing
on the outside looking in.

I had to stand on a garbage can
to look in the window.

Oh, Angela.

( sighs )

And then halfway through,
it started to rain.

So I walked around
till 2:00 in the morning

in the rain.

I wanted my parents to think
I was having a good time.

I completely
ruined the dress.

Fortunately, when I got home,
my parents were sleeping,

so I went in the kitchen
and ate a turkey.

Oh, that's terrible,
Angela.

Oh, no, no, no, no.

You're always
doing this, Angela.
You're always doing this.

You're always using your pain as
an excuse not to help yourself.

Now, look, you're not
the only person

that's suffered
in this world, you know.

Everybody's got
a story like that.

Okay, let's hear yours.

I knew I shouldn't
have said that.

Here's your pork chops.

You want me to get a head
start on something else?

No, no, Angela, Angela,
please don't.

You look so great.

Who cares?

What do you mean "who cares"?

A lot of people care.

There's a guy out there
right now,

looking all
over the city for you.

Who?

Wayne Hubbard.

Wayne?

Yeah. He came around
to the garage

and asked me to help him
look for you.

He told me he cared
for you a great deal.

Wayne-- he's a real
sweet, sensitive guy.

I couldn't have
gotten through

the last few months
without him.

Did... Did you ever
think of dating him?

( sighs )
That blimp?

No, Angela, that real
sweet, sensitive guy.

Yeah.

You like him,
don't you?

Don't push this,
Rieger.

No, come on.
I could tell

by that look on your face
when I brought him up, huh?

Okay, okay, I like him.

Yeah, yeah.
Those feelings?

Those little
feelings, Angela?

You.

But I've been resisting it.

Why? I mean, if you like
the guy... wait a minute.

It's not his
weight, is it?

Of course not.

Wayne.

Oh, thank God
you found her.

Angela, I'm very
worried about you.

I've been to every
restaurant in this city.

This is the first one I
haven't felt like eating in.

Look, I didn't invite
any of you people in here.

Shh.

I thought I could do something
to help you.

Oh, you know, you two are really
cute, you know that?

I mean, all this time you had
special feelings for each other

and you were just too shy
to come out and admit it.

( chuckles )
That's even cuter, you know?

Look, Wayne, I'm sorry.

I broke down; I told Angela
how you felt about her.

I never knew, Wayne.

Angela, we've been through
so much together, you and I.

( sighing ):
Yeah.

You're one of the
most wonderful people

that I have ever met.

I think you're
pretty special, too.

( chuckles )

Cute.

Cute, cute, cute.

Isn't that something?

Cute.

But, Wayne, I don't know
if this is going to work out.

Wait a minute,
wait a minute, wait a minute.

You don't have one problem
that can't be solved.

Now, come on. Don't let
this relationship get away.

When it's right,
it's right, right?

Hey, look, if you two aren't
going to do anything about it,

I will.

Why don't we go somewhere
for a cup of coffee?

Angela, listen to Alex.

When it's right,
it's right.

Okay, let's go
to my apartment

and have a cup of coffee.

No cream?

No sugar.

Wow, just when you thought

it couldn't get any cuter.

Aren't they cute?

Isn't that cute?

Oh, gee, Alex, you're
always coming into my life

and straightening
things out for me.

I wish there was something
I could do to help you out.

Angela, Angela,
you have already, you have.

Someone just told me that
people can't help each other.

Well, you just proved
that they can.

Now, look.
I want you both

to walk right out that
door with my blessing.

And never mind all
those little, uh, problems

that might get
in the way.

( Alex chuckles )

Alex, incidentally, about
what we were talking about?

Yeah.

The reason I didn't
go out with Wayne

had nothing to do
with his weight.

No?

No, I think he's adorable.

So what was the reason?

His wife and four kids.

Bye, Alex.

Thanks a lot,
Alex.

That's cute.

Oh, shut up!

That was even
more humiliating

than I expected it to be.

Oh, come on.

It's not
that bad.

( groans )

The longest two hours
of my life.

Hey, Tommy, give us two
six-packs to go, please.

( groans )

We wouldn't have got any hits
at all

if it wasn't for Elaine's
grandmother hit that double.

I'll give you one thing,
Wheeler-- you don't lie.

You are a lousy ball player.

What do you mean?

I stole second base standing up.

Yeah, but from third?

In case you hadn't noticed, you
weren't pitching so well, Tony.

All right, so I got mixed up
on some signs.

What signs?

You only got two pitches, Tony--
balls and home runs.

Thanks, Tommy.
Yeah.

Hey, where are you
guys going now?

Break's over.

We've got to get back
for the second inning.