Original subtitles

[Music]

i have warned you sir your fervent

persistence sorely tries my patience

do not mistake my kind demeanor for

weakness sheed your naked saber at once

before i grab it from your trembling

fingers

your crude weapons of violence are no

match for my enlightened tools of

science

oh

i hope you don't mind me reading to you

like this no no no no

please

continue

your words

have such a

stimulating effect on me yes well

that's

oh

[Music]

what are you doing in my a-loft with my

daughter

i'm

reading reading without your pants

it was an unusually warm day

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just a minute

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you humiliate me and run off the man i

love how am i supposed to find a husband

if you keep shooting at them

[Music]

come on

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[Music]

look back and thank me one day

now if i were you amnest i'd just love

to catch that legend spark in my

drusilla

yes sir i'd have him and all that book

money in my family by sundown drop it

i told you to stay off my land rush

well we tried to amos

but you didn't take down that fence like

we asked you to

we don't like it when our cattle don't

run free

i don't like it at all

[Applause]

what's wrong with him

i don't know i didn't hit him that hard

well you hit him hard enough

he's dead

[Music]

i just offered some water i know nothing

of your troubles

i don't think i've ever seen you before

you from these parts max

no senor

you don't want to die do you

senor

you know what'll happen if you tell

anybody what you saw here today

it's just going to be your word against

mine no one's going to believe the word

of a max

probably blame you for it

then i'll personally lynch you luis

you understand

season

get out of here keep on riding west

if i ever see you again i'm not gonna

kill just you but kill two other mixes

too because you didn't do what you said

you were gonna do

i clear luis

you sure about this ah it's not gonna be

a problem

besides two murders are hard to explain

one's easy

[Applause]

eat

[Music]

just as easy as reading it in a book

[Music]

well the water tank is intact but it

will never be as beautiful as it was

oh ramos there's something to be said

for craggy charm

without it half the men on the planet

would sleep alone

it would seem to me

that the chase examples set by nicodemus

legend and your books might be a little

less dangerous

yes

but where's the adventure in that

besides

drusilla's father simply misunderstood

the circumstances

a man without his pants leaves little

room for misunderstanding

ah well

here comes sheriff moses

and he's brought his cage

ramos

have you been naughty

have you

sheriff moats

out serving and protecting are we

all right legend

your hands right where i can see him

what is the meaning of this sheriff

nicodemus legend

you're under arrest for the murder of

amos dern

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do

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who they got in there

folks don't use the cage unless they're

real dangerous

well it's legend

it sure enough

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what's going on sheriff what do you want

mr legend in for charge is murder

looks like he killed amos dern after

amos caught him bundling with drusilla

mr legend say it ain't so it ain't sup

it isn't so

i didn't kill anybody

all right let's go

there

back off now back off

i know you folks like this fella

just cause he's famous don't get him any

special

attention i got solid evidence he was

out there and up to no good

rich is all right

you can't hang a man for losing his

pants

we found the murder weapon

buried on the premises

i protest i vigorously protest

the bartok electro fulminator is not a

lethal weapon

i figure it might be if it was fired at

somebody with a heart condition like

amos

come on get him inside

alan get

used to it

[Music]

this thing's brought every huckster in

the territory into town

man outside selling nicodemus legend

dolls with a noose around the neck

selling a bunch of them too

folks sure do get sentimental about a

hanging well wouldn't it be nice if they

were the least bit interested in a trial

oh

i heard today that mayor brown is going

to prosecute you himself

prosecute

i thought he was the presiding judge he

is this is the west mr legend we do the

best we can is he planning on being on

the jury too

don't be ridiculous

e.c allen sends his regards his faith in

your innocence and me

faber

i don't really need the head of business

affairs at the moment thanks anyway i'll

have you know that before i discovered

the benefits of my current lifestyle i

was considered a promising criminal

attorney now

i want a real lawyer a good lawyer i

want a lawyer with three names get my

drift oh my darling nicodemus i forgive

you

stop that there's nothing to forgive me

for you saw me leave i never came back

you know that oh

well

of course of course

i take it this vision is drusilla the

late farmer's daughter go on drusilla

tell the sheriff what you told me

well

the man i saw

riding to my farm the day my father was

killed

i just remembered

he was bald

why'd you wait till now to say so

drucilla

uh well she wasn't paying very close

attention but what with memory recall

and hypnotic suggestion

huh

sheriff this man is a potential witness

or even a suspect i insist that you put

out a bulletin with his full description

excuse me but given the pressures of

time the defense team and i have decided

to round up a few people to question all

right everybody please come in

now

you don't seem right

don't give up hope ernest we've just

begun to

i forgive you

stop that

go away

ec wants to make sure that you're

keeping a full written diary it will

make a fortune and we'll be sure to see

that your estate gets every penny you're

due my estate

i don't want an estate and i certainly

don't want my lawyer thinking about an

estate

come my dear we shall spend hours

together rehearsing your testimony oh

favor excuse me pardon neighbor make way

for the lady

stand up pardon me

[Music]

i'm afraid it's infected mr halawa we'll

need to keep an eye on it for a few days

but i'm going to california

i'm sorry but that's just not a good

idea we don't want gangrene to set in

get yourself a room in town for a few

days i want to see it again on friday

wait here i'll send a nurse in to

bandage it up for you

yes

nicodemus was with me that day in the

barn

now drusilla everyone loves mr legend

he's meant a great deal to the property

values in this town

we're here to see justice done

did mr legend court you in an unseemly

manner and were you interrupted by a

justifiably concerned father objection

overruled

mr legend is a gallant gentleman but i

fear few are immune to the overpowering

passions of love

yes

and was it those overpowering passions

that drove him to return to your farm

and kill your father so he might have

your hand in marriage i certainly hope

marriage

no one said the first word about

marriage everyone knows nicodemus legend

would never spark a girl without the

intention of marrying her

that's in the books

i'm not legend i'm pratt ernest pratt

little ernie pratt

i don't think it's in your best interest

to be ernest pratt for the time being

why well it may be possible to convince

a jury that legend would not murder a

man in cold blood but

ernest pratt

ow

god

it's an electric gun that was invented

by professor bartok i've seen him and mr

legend use it lots of times and you

believe on this occasion it was used to

electrocute mr dern

well you better say about that

chamberlain you as the one did the

medical part

well i know that

and i plan to question myself very

carefully on this matter i'm sorry your

honor but you're not a doctor

if i'm not mistaken you're a taxidermist

everybody knows that doc larkin is still

over in lime city with the measles

epidemic

is this some kind of slur against

taxidermy

it's simply that you're not qualified

you're in contempt pay the court clerk

20 to oh now see here

or go to jail

mr mayor

the bartok electropulmonator was not the

cause of any death heart condition or no

and i defy you to present evidence to

the contrary

sam

what do you got to say about this

well amos's clothes had singe marks on

them and there was the same kind of

singe marks i'd seen on other people who

was shot with the professor's electric

gun heck even his beard was still

charged with sparks and he'd been dead

for hours

no there's no doubt in my mind that amos

dern was shot with that thing right

there

[Music]

this is the ultimate weapon

in the arsenal of modern criminology

because each fingerprint is unique

using the technique of professor pujki

at university of breslau i was able to

compare the papillary rigidity professor

suffice to say that you found the prince

of fingers on the handle of the electro

fulminator yes several sheriff moats

other law enforcement officials as well

as

this one ah and uh to whom does it

belong i have no idea

hmm is it possible then that this is the

fingerprint of the true murderer of amos

dern yes it is quite possible

professor i don't have a clue to what

you're talking about but i do have a

question

did you find the printed finger of

nicodemus legend on that fulminator well

of course i did

mr legend uses it regularly but you see

thank you professor no further questions

i hereby give myself

permission to treat the next witness is

hostile

skeeter this is a court of law if you

don't answer my questions i'll hold you

in contempt

contempt what's that mean it means

you'll be cleaning up horse droppings

for another month and no tips oh

contempt

ask away

now you were there when the defendant's

room was searched weren't you i opened

the door for the sheriff uh-huh and you

found some of his personal writings in

his personal notepad didn't you

yes

is this it

read it to the jury

[Applause]

the killer was so popular in his town

read it nights

he knew that no one would ever convict

him of the murder but he was determined

to have the love of the sweet young

thing so he killed her shotgun toting

father to better give him an opportunity

at winning her hand i didn't write that

it has a split infinitive

it's obviously a forgery

now skeeter

mr legend often uses his real life as

material for his books doesn't he

i wouldn't know

gentleman of the jury

i submit

that this manuscript of the latest

legend novel

is indeed

a confession of guilt

[Music]

government of the jury have you reached

the verdict yes your honor

mr legend please rise

[Music]

go ahead smokey

we're real sorry mr legend

but we think you've done it

[Music]

it is the sense of this court

that you should be hanged by the neck

until dead

said hanging to take place

tomorrow

[Music]

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is there anything in particular you'd

like your headstone to say

how about

vacancy

mr legend i hope you don't hold any

animosity toward me or the town

you had your trial the verdict came in

fair and square

fair and square

let's see

the evidence was trumped up the

prosecutor was the judge

my defense was criminally incompetent

fair and square

yes i suppose i'd call it that sure fair

and square sounds like it yeah

that's the way things usually go in the

west we're doing the best we can

oh yes the best we can

well it wasn't quite good enough was it

chamberlain

i assure you your memory will always be

sacred here i put a deposit down on your

rooms at the silver king to maintain

them exactly as they are on your day of

execution

we're already running tours uh 10

will be given to memorial fund in your

name

[Music]

hey you it's a harmonica

stuff it

dinner time

it's only four o'clock

hold it right there

[Applause]

let's see what you got here

mr legend's metabolism is under stress

he needs a greater caloric intake

you know if you immigrants are gonna

live in this country i don't know why

you can't learn to speak the language

a token of remembrance from the girls of

the buffalo head saloon where

mr legend will be sorely missed

come on

not hungry oh wait until you see what

we've prepared for you

would you like some coffee

there's an oxygen tank inside

you activate it this way you see

would you like

some candies

combustion chamber

you put it underneath and then right

here

is the igniter

you'd get a flame and you'll be able to

cut through the bars

oh don't forget put on your mask

bon appetit

yes chef

ready

good luck

sheriff can i talk to you for a second

yeah

could you give me any career advice

career advice

[Music]

[Applause]

so

[Music]

[Applause]

well i'm uh thinking about becoming a

law man like yourself

is there a school where you go to learn

that sort of thing

[Music]

[Applause]

legends

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[Applause]

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there you man

help me now prisoner's escape

legends on the moon

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i hereby deputize all you able-bodied

men to join this posse and bring this

prisoner

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i got it

[Music]

and bartok

dummies

i'm surrounded by them

[Music]

what do you expect to find here janos

well there's an old gypsy saying if you

can't find the bald man you look for the

bald man's horse

ah yes that's what i love about gypsies

a different saying for every occasion

awful lot of hoof prints on this road

yes but there's only one that would lead

from this point to the scene of the

murder but we don't know if the bald man

went to the farm

i have a hunch that he did no the old

clairvoyance acting up again is it well

what with all the publicity why hasn't

the bald man come forward

why

maybe he's scared or maybe he committed

the murder

unlikely ramos very unlikely

to be framed as well as i've been framed

the killer would have to be local much

as he was in legend

meets blind justice

my god

life imitates art

except in the books i wasn't hung

professor

oh yes

that could be it let me see my notes

now what was it that drusilla said

during hypnosis

he was riding an old baymare

she was walking slowly

maybe a little

lame lame that's it

are these not the prince of a corrective

shoe yes professor it's a bar shoe a

blacksmith would make it to assist the

lame horse very well i want you to get

the bartok tri-dimensional recorder

camera

if this path leads to the bomb wait wait

wait we can't go up there what if

drusilla is home

no don't worry your lawyers volunteered

to entertain her

he's what

he was here ernest

all we have to do is follow this horse

print wherever it may lead us

maybe we could use kit carson for that

oh not so

no tracking can be fun and simple with a

multiple tri-dimensional recording

camera ramos the photographic print

thank you very much now all we need to

do is to manipulate the wheels so that

the transparent image

superimposes itself upon the print

and then the electrical circuits

senses when it's identical

and voila you see

there now the only thing that we have to

be concerned about is that the terrain

cooperates and then we'll be able to

follow him

well let's just hope he didn't change

horses in mid-stream eh oh no

this doesn't work in a stream

the tracks definitely lead to that

farmhouse over there

cover your face i'll do the talking

is this really necessary

as you said yourself the secrets of a

good disguise are in the minutes details

how do you do sir we don't need any

fortunes told here ah yes well you look

like a man who has created his own

fortune i am professor janos and this is

my brother mykonos an unfortunate mute

we're looking for our third brother

zoltan who might have come by here a few

days ago

oh no no no we mean you know home

posse's over dry creek watering up

go get surf moats and get him over here

tell him i got nicodemus legend

uh no no no you're making a grievous

mistake oh look how you are you're

upsetting my poor mute stupid idiot

brother

i know those eyes those beady little

eyes are on all the books

beady are they

well aren't we the master of the fresh

adjective but my brother speaks he

speaks oh save it giannos

put down your rifle stamp

don't you go getting soft on me bonnie

blue just cause you read his books from

cover to cover

bonnie blue

what a lyrical name

sir

your adventures fill me with sweet

dreams while i'm chopping weeds and

butchering hogs

i know you couldn't have done such a

thing

there's a 20 reward

there's not enough money in this world

to make me turn my hand against

nicodemus legend

now put it down

why thank you bonnie blue

i'd love to spend the afternoon with you

chatting about me

however the posse's been summoned

we're on the trail of a bald man who

might be able to prove my innocence yes

and we think that he's come this way i'm

sorry we haven't seen anyone i have

a bald man

you were at the creek elijah i told you

to fetch me whenever a stranger no it's

all right elijah that's all right you

should listen to your mother however

did you talk to him

he was hurt something was wrong with his

leg he needed a doctor bad i gave him

some water

how close is the nearest hospital well

you'd have to go into denver for that

there's a hospital just inside the city

limits i told that's where you took them

and i broke my arm

you did good elijah real good

mr legend i cried when i heard they were

gonna hang you

that makes two of us

but you know what the help you just gave

me i might be able to prove i didn't do

it you'll not have to prove it to me mr

legend i know it from the start

[Music]

thanks

professor

the posse

we'll never outrun him in this rig take

my horse mr legend

oh no no thank you i couldn't do that i

insist no i mean i really couldn't

no no no it's really it's a good idea

the only chance will create a diversion

you know how horses feel about me yes

and i know how you feel about hanging

right rubbles the sonic grenades

[Music]

all right

[Music]

[Music]

[Music]

oh you're running in the wrong direction

he's going right straight towards him

that's my nicodemus

[Music]

run right now there's nothing to fear

this is only irritating the horse's dogs

and the occasional war cog but i suggest

you get inside because of the posse

hurry

come come

all right

now

[Music]

oh

[Music]

[Music]

oh

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[Music]

stop

hurt at least hurt

[Music]

[Music]

thank you

thank you very much

[Music]

we have to assume that our dirt farmer

friend is sending a posse here in the

hopes of collecting a reward

while you make the rounds i will check

the treatment records of the last few

days

make rounds yes yes go from getting to

bed ask them how they're doing make

appropriate clucking sounds but don't

offer any advice you'll be fine my son

hello

doctor thank god i found you luisa's

sweating like a horse and no one seems

to care no wait wait wait i have no

formal training in sweating let me find

you a specialist there's no time for one

louise honey i found a doctor hurry

harold i think the baby's coming

oh

nicotine miss legend harold it's

nicodemus legend inverse no madam you

must be mistaken

never i know those eyes anywhere you're

right

you're in disguise because you're on a

case aren't you yes well you might say

that

this is a real honor sir the reason i

have read all of your books you

impersonated a one-legged buffalo hunter

and beast of the badlands in traders of

the chisholm trail you played the part

of memphis

chinese magician

i loved you and all your adventures

thank you

it would be a real honor if you deliver

our baby what

all right why don't i go fetch some

boiling water get a midwife for you and

a shot of bourbon for me no please stay

until my baby comes if it's a boy we'll

name it after you

nicka d

must oh

father

yes my son

what are you doing in my office

i'm retrieving information concerning

one of my permission as a patient

the

hospital administrator felt that it

wouldn't be

bad if i did it myself

of course if dr snodgrass approves

it's ironic you've come i've been

wanting to see a priest for quite some

time

have you

blessed me father for i have sinned

i've just become a godfather good i

believe i found our man luis alwa the

only one with a leg injury that week

gunshot wound eh yes he's coming back

for treatment on friday

also he lives out here and we may find

legends

wait here boys i'm gonna check with the

head dog

[Music]

it's all right my son it's alright oh

father i can't believe he's gone yeah

it's only 110. yes i know so fast it's

all right god

[Music]

[Music]

oh my sons would you help me with this

poor man we must take him to the funeral

parlor be very kind with her gentlemen

[Music]

denied

[Music]

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thank you father

[Music]

bald man

bad leg it's got to be him

let's go

[Music]

the bald man with a bad leg we found him

he's in that house

oh you mean louise hollywood

yeah

they told us about him over to the

hospital his doctor said he was doing

day work down to the stable

we just questioned him he said the only

thing he saw was amos dern shoot at you

when you took off

and he just rode away

sheriff

we have scientific evidence that alewa

went to the dern farm and it is quite

possible that he was wounded by the real

killer

no he said it was just an accident and

we don't need any more of your

scientific evidence professor take them

both into custody boys custody hell

sheriff

supposed to hang anyway i say let's just

do it right now and get it over with get

it over with

we're talking about a hanging a very

important moment in a man's life it's

not something you just get over with i

think we should take him back to town

and do it legal

we saw what happened last time you had

him sheriff

oh you're making a mistake here rush yes

a big huge mistake

after all if you do hang me and find out

later it was a mistake there's not much

you can do to rectify the situation

after all we'll be taking him away

problem because i'll be dead yeah

broken

hey get over here

i kick the bucket

to me

shuffle off my mortal coil i'd be

pushing up daisies on boot hill i'd be

an ex prat

senor if you saw anything you must tell

them

i saw nothing

an innocent man is going to die

it's a gringo fight it's not mine has

nothing to do with me if you fear them

it does

if they threaten you into silence it

does

then it is not about them it is about us

and how you and i and all of our people

are going to be treated in this country

by men like those

it is a matter of courage and of honor

senor

you'll kill me

who the gringo

i saw him kill the old farmer

he rides with the posse

do we really have to use a horse

hey

i will stand beside you

he'll kill you too

entonces um

hey wait a minute wait here

there are customs to be observed don't i

get a last meal

no well at least let me say something

the final words of nicodemus legend will

live in infamy

god

thank you

for my final words i'd like to recite

one of my favorite passages from one of

my favorite works

it's the soliloquy from the mad

comanchero it should only take an hour

so that's enough you promised stop

you're hanging the wrong man

this man saw the murder he can identify

the killer

point out the man who killed amos stern

how about it rush

he's lying

why would i kill amos dern

didn't i hear you ranchers were unhappy

that he put up some fences

we had a little range dispute but i

didn't kill him

hey

the mex was there maybe uh

maybe he killed him himself

sheriff

i can provide an answer to this question

allow me to take the fingerprints of mr

rosh and mr alawa and i will compare

them to those on the fulaminator we will

find out who is innocent and perhaps who

is guilty sounds fine to me

[Music]

you got a problem with that rush

[Music]

[Music]

please allow me the honors

[Music]

[Music]

you know it's funny how people's

attitude changes toward you when they

realize you're not a cold-blooded killer

yes and how it changes when they do

yes

would you care to join drusilla dirt and

myself for a celebratory cup

to sell it down

i would think that you would want to

stay well away from her

oh well you know why 12 in the past

she's young and impressionable

i intend to impress her if you know what

i mean

ah gentlemen we were just about to catch

the outbound coach

we

oh nicodemus

it's so exciting

milton

thinks i have a brilliant future on the

new york stage

does he

yes well i have many clients in the

theatrical trade i intend to launch

drusilla as my protege

do you congratulations again this is a

great day for e.c allen and nicodemus

legend

yes

and a great day for milton j faber

trust me

i know

[Music]

you