Original subtitles

Fuck it off. You can't get a girl that way.

All right?

Oh, this is talking to me about who's going to get a girl. How many girls have

you had this week? All right, well, maybe... No, how many girls have you had

this week? Okay. I had a girl on Monday, and then I had two girls on Tuesday,

and then on Wednesday... Wednesday, I had the same girls I fucked on Monday.

really can't count them.

I'm thirsty.

Let's drink some water.

Booze, baby!

Booze, baby!

Can I get you guys some coffee?

Yeah, of course.

Coffees would be good.

Irish coffee.

be really nice you've got a really nice skirt my skirt yeah you kind of like got

the catholic school girl thing going on you know if i wasn't raised a lutheran

you and i'd be making babies oh if you were mad i'd kick your ass

i

think she really likes it

I want him out of here, Ben.

All right, all right, all right.

Man, now we got to go, man.

You can't pat people on the ass like that. Come on.

I'm hearing bells.

Oh, yeah,

that's what we need.

Oh,

good.

Use us. That's ours.

The fuck it is.

We called it first.

Don't be such a bitch. Where are you guys going?

Franklin and Gower.

All right, we're off to Beachwood. We'll share.

Cool, thanks.

You're so nice all the time. Why do you have to be a bitch all the time?

Get in the fucking car.

I have one hot bit.

That's great.

Man, ladies, I'm sorry. The vet said he was housebroken, but, you know, there's

always a little way to go.

What happened to your face?

Oh, chicken gave me bad coupon.

Waffle. Three for five dollars, three for five.

That's funny.

I love that so.

Family dude rules.

I bet you're a good schoolgirl, I'll say.

Give me a break.

Oh, Liz, you're the one who said you'd get fucked so bad tonight that your

hurt. What?

You can stop here, cabbie.

You can stop here. Yeah, thanks.

Well, it was really nice meeting you ladies.

Thanks for sharing the cab.

Hey, come on, Ryan.

Ryan, why don't you get off the girl? Ryan, we're here.

All right.

Maybe if we get out, I can pull him off of your friend.

Yeah. Sorry.

Yeah.

Sorry. Sorry.

Come on. Come on.

Ryan, get off the girl.

That's great.

All right.

Let the girl go. Ryan.

Get off the girl, man.

Collette, where are you going?

Sorry. I can't just leave you here.

Here you go.

Look, I'm sorry. That's my roommate. He's a total selfish prick sometimes.

Thanks.

Thank you.

Do you want to go inside until we can separate those two?

I knew I was just cocky.

Once they get started, they'll be fucking like roosters all night.

Once she starts, she can't stop.

I guess you shouldn't have shared that cab after all.

It's all right. I'm telling you that I am.

Yeah, I know.

You a big Barney fan?

Just vivid movies.

Cool. I mean, it's not like I'm a pervert or anything. I watch David

stuff. It's all artsy.

He's such a fucking asshole.

He needs to disappoint you.

Yeah, the talented ones always are.

Are you cold?

Yeah, freezing.

Do you want to go inside?

Told you that.

This is a big space.

We're probably going to make that into a game room, put a pool table there.

That's our couch. We kind of need to get a new one. We haven't done it yet.

And so you really do know who I am?

Um, yeah.

I have to admit, I'm kind of a little starstruck.

So is that where you do it?

Is that where I do what?

Stroke your cock while you watch me cum.

Um, well, no.

Usually I do that in my room.

That way my roommate doesn't catch me.

So you don't jack off in front of your roommates?

No, not so much. Not cool, really.

Well, I do.

I bet you do.

So what's your favorite scene?

All of them?

Why don't you tell me what your favorite scene is, and we'll watch it.

It's probably all... Chewed up, we could just put it in.

Just put it in.

Oh, yeah.

Oh, that's much better.

I don't know

Woo!

um

Oh, man.

I don't know

You come when I come, okay?

Okay.

Don't look at me.

I want you to watch my movie.

Ugh.

Yeah. Yeah.

Yeah, fucking dope.

Fuck.

Thirsty or anything? You want a drink?

So,

is

it ever like weird with your boyfriends and stuff in the business?

Totally.

Like when you wake up and your boyfriend brings you breakfast in bed and you

have this really sweet morning, but then you got to go to work and fuck some

asshole.

It sucks.

But it's kind of like cheating when you don't want to, but you got to because

it's your job.

But then there's the other side to it.

The other side?

Yeah.

Like when you wake up and you have a big fight with your boyfriend and then you

go to work and you fuck the pain away.

And then you come home, and you feel better.

You fuck him ten times harder.

So have you had a lot of boyfriends since you've been in the business?

Yeah, it's been about two.

Actually, one and a half.

One guy I really loved.

Dated him before I got in the business.

But then I signed with Vivid, and he couldn't handle it.

The other guy, he's kind of just like a beat director guy.

He'd always put himself in my movies.

Never let me work with anybody else.

He was sweet, though, but too controlling. That's not what I'm looking

Okay, what are you looking for?

Someone who's sensitive.

Someone who accepts me for who I am and doesn't want to change me.

Someone who's smart, but tough.

Someone I can talk to.

Someone sexy?

Someone cool?

Someone like you, maybe?

Me? I don't know if I could handle you.

I'm a handful.

I'll give you that.

But I'm a good person.

I'm not like these other bitches.

Like David Stanley. He used to date this fucking bitch named Ash.

My loneliness is burning a hole right through me.

And I want you to know that I'd never abandon you, and I'd never break your

heart, and I'd always bring you roses that are redder than your heart, and

breakfast in the softest, fluffiest bed you've ever slept in.

All right.

You've got to shut up.

me.

Oh my God.

Thank you.

Your daddy was my best friend.

And I want to let you know I'm your friend.

What are you going to do now?

I want to get fucked up. That's what I want to do now.

I want five guys with the biggest fucking cocks you've ever seen to fuck

hole in my body.

That's what I want to do now.

What an asshole he is.

You believe it?

Asshole. Fucking asshole.

You would never do that to me, would you?

Never. Never.

Are you sure, baby?

Yeah, I'm sure. I'm sure.

Because I was thinking, could we have time?

You know, we talked about getting married.

Hey, shut up. Go to bed.

Okay.

Naughty.

Yeah.

Oh, God.

Yeah, you'd never lose me.

Fucking come on my own finger

Please. Please. Fuck you.

Right there, right there.

Three dogs, a banana, and a juju fruit.

Disgusting.

My cock was there, but I didn't cry.

He's screaming at you. Tell him to fuck off, okay?

Ben's a creep?

Yeah, he's a creep. Tell him to fuck off. Oh, yeah, Ben's a creep.

Fuck him.

Fuck him. Fuck him.

Hi.

Hey. Hey.

Hey. Fuck this party. Fuck this.

somebody stand up and walk out if they didn't have issues.

I mean, you can't really blame him for the way... Oh, yes, I certainly can

a man for leaving a woman standing at the aisle like that and all the people

that came from all out of town.

Well, did you ever think that maybe he's doing her a favor?

Well, I certainly think that he is.

Because any man that would do that certainly isn't right for her.

You know, you're not giving him the benefit of the doubt.

It's really unfair.

I think you should talk to him before you can make a statement like that.

Maybe I'm being rude.

I'm sorry.

I'm sorry, too.

You're entitled to your opinion.

So are you.

He just wanted me to be like some perfect little girl from some...

Old time movie or something.

Like a little boy that way.

I'd never abandon you, and I'd never break your heart, and I'd always bring

roses that are redder than your heart, and breakfast in the softest, fluffiest

bed you've ever slept in.

He's just like a little boy that way.

It's totally fucking crazy.

Because you know what I really am?

What's that?

thank you so much

thank you

I don't know.

Chris.

Oh.