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supposed to be typing my history paper.

Is it supposed to be double spaced?

Of course, you idiot.

You followed me from my room to ask me that?

Well, who are you going to meet? And when are we going to go on a date again?

You can stay in my room.

You can type my papers. But that's it.

What if I want more?

No.

Someday you're going to change your mind.

Well,

when's the history paper due?

In two days, are you comfortable?

I want to be more than a homework helper.

Well, that's your only option.

Hi, this is Eric.

Please leave a message at the sound of the beep.

So what's going on? No call, no letter this week.

We live in the same city.

You can't give me the courtesy of a phone call.

I send you to a school that's costing me as much as if I bought a yacht for

myself, and you treat me like a stranger.

Now, I want you to call.

I want to hear that you've improved in sociology.

I'd appreciate hearing from you as soon as possible.

Thank you.

I can walk on this road.

I'm looking forward to continuing my unmatched record of man -eating.

Cosmopolitan magazine says I'm fun, fearless, you know.

Oh.

Hmm.

um

you

Is that what you normally do in the study room?

He just came in.

Thank you for watching.

Friends, remember Times Square?

Remember the buses blaring the sexual tones of freedom and happiness?

It's not here anymore.

Look around.

It's dead.

You remember when Times Square was a place where you could come and really

partake in the smut that the world has to offer, remember?

That's right. But what we want is here.

Am I right?

Am I right? That's right.

Friends. 8th Avenue was once the mecca of massage parlors and beautiful

streetwalkers, much to the delight of letches like myself.

There was no AIDS then, and the world was our sexual oyster.

Before us now is the last great holdout of sexual entertainment in Manhattan,

Mighty Show World, with its great lines staring down the forces of

gentrification. All hail Leo the Letcherist, the Fantasy Show Girls, the

Shows. It's all here, and for just one dollar, just one dollar.

you can still partake in the last vestiges of a sadly dying world.

Just one dollar. Come on.

All right.

You think the most beautiful girls?

It's a rock song. It'll be great. I love your lecture, Mr. Lazarus, but are

there any old -style massage powders left? I could sure use one.

I know somebody that you might like. Hold on a second.

Bond and the Redhead work together in an office, okay?

A dozen red roses are delivered to the Redhead.

And the Redhead looks at the roses and she says, Oh, shit, now I'm going to

to spend all night on my back with my legs in the air again.

Bond stops and she says, Well, why don't you just buy a van?

Your jokes are getting better.

Delivery is worse, though.

Mitchie. Bert.

Great to see you. You too.

This is Eric, my new protege.

Hi, Eric.

Says his girl mistreats him, looking for a piece of the past.

Relax, she's not going to bite.

You know, you can get a massage anywhere in New York, but not in a joint run by

one of the great porno stars of all time.

Hmm.

I've got just the thing for you.

Well, come on in.

Okay.

Now here we have Nancy.

And this is Crystal.

And over here we have the lovely Tina.

And Shiloh.

I have two other ladies, but they're occupied at the moment.

But Eric, you get first dibs because you.

Need it so badly.

That'd be great. Go ahead, Shiloh.

Fun. Key word, fun.

It's like in a movie.

First time?

First masseuse.

Why did you hug me?

Sometimes we can just tell when a person needs a hug.

Lay back, please. On your stomach.

I was just supposed to ask if I want extras or anything.

What did you have in mind?

I mean, I didn't offend you.

Bert said that, you know, that's the way. No.

It's okay. I'm not offended.

Lay back, please.

On your stomach.

you're so pretty i want to i'd like to do everything

i mean how much is it

This enough atmosphere?

I know I'm a sick fuck.

But never, never boring.

Hmm.

Ooh.

I'd like a set of these on my coffee table.

If I had a coffee, too.

I like your shade of lipstick.

I bet you say that to all the hoes.

Lipstick shade?

It's called Fuck My Face.

Stick traces on a two -inch stick.

I'm a solid two and a half.

Whatever gets you through the night, Thumbelina.

Somehow I thought this would be more sleazy. You want sleaze?

Yeah

Oh, you're smiling.

You can smile more often. It looks good on you.

Tell me another sexual sin.

Officer, I came in my pants during the lap dance.

What? That glitter, that top of your pants. Oh, my God.

So Times Square isn't as dead as you make it out to be, is it, mister? You're

guide. Not if you can still make a white spot in the front of your pants for a

lousy ten bucks.

Actually, it cost 40.

The girl danced three songs and I tipped her.

Oh yeah.

That's what I want. Oh, yeah. Oh, you do that.

You're tight.

You scare me.

Oh, yeah, I'm sorry.

Oh, you make a big mess. That scares me.

Really big.

Oh, yeah.

Fuck it.

Come on, fuck it.

Come on, fuck it.

I'm gonna cum.

Fuck!

Yeah? Oh, yeah.

Oh, I'm coming, baby.

at your job could be a career not my career

what's so bad about it i mean give people pleasure it's not

the job if i had a guy i wouldn't want to do both i couldn't that kind of old

-fashioned well yeah i guess if i went to that metropolitan university

where all those liberal ideas were but

In my heart, I know the difference between a whore and a lady.

Can't you be both?

No.

No, I can't. I don't want to.

Shut up.

You know, I was going to actually ask you if you wanted to go away with me.

Maybe forget about...

Forget about that girl at school, but you know what? Forget it.

Just go.

Will you please go?

I got so pissed off and I don't understand why.

He shouldn't get so bent out of shape over a jump. I mean, really.

Yeah, I know. You're right.

He's a really nice guy.

Some girls really screwed him up. Yeah, I'm sure.

I guess I shouldn't have gotten so mad.

I don't know.

Tough acting's so desperate.

Just forget about it for a while, okay?

Okay.

Where are you taking me, anyway?

You know, I...

A wave of the future.

Fun and amusement.

If the city starts to close down some of the old -fashioned strip clubs like

it's threatening to, there'll be a lot more places like this.

Small bars with friendly, intimate people.

Uh,

Crystal. I didn't know if you got the message I left on your voice. Now, have

ever failed to show up, Margie?

This is my friend Shiloh.

Oh, like the Civil War battle?

No, it's a place in the Bible.

No, no, the Civil War.

It's the Bible.

What?

Yes.

Have you been a naughty boy since the last time I saw you?

How can I help myself?

I hope you see a simple smile.

Next song.

You want to walk down?

Me? Yes, you.

My treat. I'm dancing for Marvie.

Sure.

Juliana. Hi.

Hi. How have you been?

Where have you been?

I hope you haven't had

any other dancers than any of the other girls when you were waiting.

Just one.

Did you make a white spot?

No. Not yet.

I've missed you these last couple weeks.

You missed my big fat ass.

I was naughty and I couldn't stop thinking about it.

Does your wife know you were naughty for me?

You wouldn't tell her, would you? I might.

Didn't you say she works at the perfume counter down at that department store on

Broadway?

She wouldn't go there, would you?

And I tell her why there wasn't any sperm for her.

I only had sperm for you.

Right then, there's a nasty fountain of balls.

Oh, sister.

Oh, I'm going to be bad.

Now you have the proof of my bad boyness.

Hey, give me another 21, good boy.

Here you go.

It is so good to enjoy your workout.

Now I have to go potty.

What is that word, potty?

You know, your wife is going to... Are you kidding?

I have a change of pants in the car.

But when you come see me next time, would you please come in and help me

that picture?

I sure will see you.

Bye. Bye, Marty.

Um, so do you have to work for this place, or can you just come in like a

dancer? It's a part -time job.

You get paid another day.

And is this the way there's a future?

Please shut up.

If the mayor closes down the place like you said.

I don't know what to do.

What's going to happen to all of us?

I love you. I love you so much.

Chrissy, what are you fucking crazy for? You have no fucking idea.

It's not a joke that I've been telling.

I'm just too shy to tell you.

Chrissy, what are you doing?

I love you.

Didn't you hear what I said out there? I meant it. Why don't me and you go away

together?

Crystal, stop it.

I'm not gay.

What do you mean you're not gay?

Everybody's gay.

What about that two -girl show we did? I mean, you liked that, didn't you?

Crystal, that was just a show.

Are you sure?

I'm not sure about this.

Hmm.

your advice.

Shiloh said she wants to leave Angie's.

She wants to go with me.

So what's the problem?

Oh, should I trust her? I mean, she's... Oh.

Say it.

That doesn't mean she's not a human being, you adolescent jerk.

But we'd send the dumber Johns into the corner where the air conditioner was,

and we'd tell them to stand in front of it, and that that was a blowjob.

Terrible.

Eric, it's nice to see you again. How you doing?

Good, good.

What can I do for you?

Um, I came to see Shiloh. Hey, tell him Shiloh ain't here.

Shiloh's not here tonight, but I have a few other girls waiting.

Hey, did Shiloh say why she couldn't come in?

Uh, no, she didn't. In fact, she hasn't even called. I hope she's okay. I kind

of had my curtsy on Shiloh.

How about Crystal?

That's her?

Yeah.

Sure.

Sure. I mean, I can't be dependent on Shiloh, right? Or anybody.

So, yeah, my dad says, you know, I should play the field. And so, yeah,

what I'll do. Sure. Crystal.

Great. And there's a new girl.

Do you mind if she participates a little bit? You know, she needs to learn the

ropes.

Is it extra?

Seventy -five bucks.

Two girls?

Okay. Yeah.

Okay. Let's go.

You want to play a special game tonight, Eric?

Something different?

My wallet's in there.

What did you do that for?

Leone, take off your robe and have a seat.

Is that what I get 75 bucks for?

Absolutely.

Have you ever turned over control to a woman?

What about my clothes?

Eric, now you're really naked.

See, if I didn't give you back your clothes, you'd have to leave this place

naked.

How does that make you feel?

You're not going to hurt me, are you? Oh, you sound almost disappointed when

say that.

Don't turn around.

Put your hands behind your back and cross them at the... Put your fucking

behind your back and cross them at the wrists.

I believe that the mind is the strongest chain.

Now, if I tell you to keep your hands behind your back, Eric, dear, obey.

Say yes, Miss Crystal.

Yes, Miss Crystal.

Good. Now, one more time.

Do not uncross your wrists unless I tell you to.

Why did the pervert cross the road?

Huh?

Why did the pervert cross the road?

I don't know, Miss Crystal.

Because he couldn't get his dick out of the chicken.

Would you ever fuck a chicken, nasty boy?

I hope that's not what you think of me, Miss Crystal. You know, I see you as a

boy who doesn't know what side his bread is buttered on. You're just a silly,

spoiled boy.

A spoiled, silly boy.

You are not even worthy enough to look upon a real woman. Close your eyes.

Close your fucking eyes.

You know, you're young.

But you will learn your proper place in the world of women.

You belong on your knees.

Close your fucking eyes and put your hands behind your back.

Now. Can you sniff that?

Huh? You sniff that? Oh, you're not worthy of that yet.

That's a shoe. That's my leather shoe. Can you smell the leather? Huh?

Leather is animal. You are animal.

Precisely. A little doggy.

Wolf, wolf, wolf, little doggy. Lick Miss Crystal's shoes.

Come on, let me feel that fucking tongue.

There you go.

Kiss him.

What's your nose?

Leave your tongue.

I didn't touch myself, Miss Crystal.

Oh, is silly boy getting excited?

Yes, Miss Crystal.

Does silly boy want to play with his pee -pee?

Oh, yes.

Fuck no.

Open your eyes.

Ass is a man's greatest obsession.

Put your fucking hands down your back.

It's also his greatest love and his greatest fear.

Not breasts.

Breasts are for cowards.

For babies.

But an ass makes a man feel strong when he conquers it.

To be conquered by a woman's ass?

Well, that's just the right place of some.

Put your fucking hands behind your back.

Do not move them.

Men are so greedy. Look at you over there eating us up with your eyes.

Funny, actually.

You're funny. Look at yourself in the fucking mirror.

Look at yourself.

Oh, I'd rather look at you, Miss Crystal.

Do not look at me.

You are a pathetic little fuck.

Mm -hmm. Mm -hmm.

You like watching her fuck my face?

Don't you wish it was you? Yes, yes. Because you're a pathetic little

Mm.

Oh.

Mm.

Look in the fucking mirror at yourself.

Oh.

You like it, huh?

Oh, yes, yes. You like this stupid fuck?

Stay over there. Come on. Keep stroking yourself. It's the best you're ever

going to get.

You know, I am so sick of hearing your fucking voice.

Can't you see I'm busy?

Oh, God.

That's my girl. Keep her leg open.

Keep it wide.

That's my girl.

There we go. That's my girl. You want to come for me?

You want to come for me? You want to come for me?

Oh,

is Crystal going to come too?

Oh, God.

Oh, at least watch me when I come, please.

Is Crystal?

What did you say?

I'm going to have to train you to last longer than five seconds.

I'm sorry, Miss Crystal. I'll be better.

For what?

What are you sorry for?

For being bad.

To who? What are you talking about?

To Shiloh.

To Dana.

It's my dad.

And you expect me to absolve you?

You're just a... You're just a dumb clock, man.

Dumb, dumb, dumb.

You know, I really don't know what Shiloh sees in you.

I don't know. I'm all mixed up.

Look, give it a shot. You need a lucky break. Maybe it's Shiloh.

She's a whore.

And you're a John.

A trick.

Look, I sell nostalgia for the old days, but I don't kid myself.

I remember how bad they could be.

For every Shiloh, there were five girls to rip you off. For every good porn

flick, there were a hundred stinkers.

For every great stripper, there were fifty losers or junkies peddling hundred

-dollar bottles of only champagne.

dealers, muggers, geeks, pimps, and worst of all, when you went to the

the deuce, you couldn't even sit under the balcony because you were afraid that

the whiners were going to throw cigarettes down.

Hey, look, this life isn't for everybody.

I don't think it's for you, and maybe it's not for Shia LaBeouf. So go to

I know I hate it well, but believe me, life without love can be hell.

You're a little suck of it, aren't you? Huh?

That's my neighbor, Yvonne. She looks right down the hall for me about four o

'clock stuff.

In -call and out -call on the side. She advertises in all the free papers. She

eats tourists like you for breakfast.

I'm not a tourist.

Aren't you?

It's too late to say I'm sorry, okay?

Look, I'm sinking here, Shiloh. Throw me a rope or something.

Why?

You really want to be with someone like Dana and not me?

How are we supposed to know? We've never even been together.

Eric, it wouldn't work.

I'm going to go away, and I'm going to go back to school.

I'm going to start over, and I'm not going to fuck for a living anymore.

I don't want to pay for fucking anymore.

Well, that didn't come out the way I meant it.

All right.

Come away with me, then.

Right now.

I gotta go back to the dorm to get some stuff.

Okay. In two hours, meet me at gate 423 at the bus station, okay?

Bus terminal? Where are we going?

It doesn't matter where we're going.

Two hours, 423.

Where do you think you're going, huh?

I'm just getting started with you. It's time for payback.

Welcome home, baby boy.

I love you so much. I don't care what you do to me.