All language subtitles for The secret life 2

(GRAND ORCHESTRAL FANFARE
PLAYING)

(BALL SQUEAKING)

- (DOGS BARKING)
- MINION: Stop-ah!

Stop-ah!

(PANTING)

- (CHUCKLES)
- (BALL SQUEAKING)

(DOG BARKS)

- (WHIMPERS) Illumination!
- (DOGS BARKING)

("EMPIRE STATE OF MIND" BY
JAY-Z AND ALICIA KEYS PLAYING)

♪ Yeah, I'm out that Brooklyn,
now I'm down in Tribeca ♪

- ♪ Right next to De Niro ♪
- (BARKING, INDISTINCT CHATTER)

- ♪ But I'll be hood forever ♪
- (BICYCLE BELL DINGS)

- ♪ I'm the new Sinatra ♪
- BOY: Yeah!

- ♪ And since I made it here ♪
- (BIRDS CHIRPING)

- ♪ I can make it anywhere ♪
- (GIRL GIGGLING)

♪ Yeah, they love me
everywhere ♪

- ♪ In New York ♪
- ♪ Yes, hey ♪

♪ Concrete jungle
where dreams are made of ♪

♪ There's nothin'
you can't do, okay ♪

- (BARKING)
- ♪ Now you're in New York... ♪

MAX:
Ah, kids.

- Everybody loves them, right?
- (DOGS BARKING)

- You probably love kids.
- (BOY LAUGHING)

- Hey!
- I got to admit...

- ...I don't.
- (BARKING)

That's me, by the way.
I'm Max.

I'm the little dog
right there,

grateful I'm not being piled on
by a horde of children.

(LAUGHS) Wait for me!

Ugh. Can you believe that?

(LAUGHS)
Having a kid looks like fun.

Nah, man, it ain't fun.

I'm telling you, once
the humans bring a kid home,

your life ain't the same.

- (DOG BARKING)
- (KIDS YELLING)

(CHUCKLES)
Seen it a billion times.

It changes you.

♪ I'm from the Empire State,
that's... ♪

MAX:
Now, I thought I never

had to worry about any of that,
but then one day...

(GRUNTS) Ow!

- ...my owner Katie met Chuck.
- Hey.

Are you okay?

Oh. Uh, yeah.

(LAUGHS)

- MAX: A little while later, they're married.
- Hi, guys.

- Which... it-it's great.
- (BARKING)

Chuck is really...
he's a good guy.

- (MAX BARKS)
- But then...

- Aw.
- ...something happened.

(GASPS)

- (CHUCKLES)
- (MAX WHINES)

(CHUCK SNORING)

♪ ♪

(BABY COOING, SUCKLING)

MAX: Katie and Chuck
had a kid of their own.

His name's Liam.

(LIAM COOS)

At first,
he slept all the time.

Dreaming about, you know,

whatever it is
that babies dream about.

- Who's a cute little baby?
- (LAUGHING)

MAX:
He had his place...

- (BABBLING)
- You little cutie pie.

...and I had mine.

Things seemed like
they were gonna be fine.

- (LIAM YELLING)
- (SNORTS) Wha...?

MAX:
Until he started talking.

(YELLING, GRUNTING)

(MAX GRUNTS)

And eventually,
he started crawling.

(MAX WHIMPERS)

- Sort of.
- (GRUNTS)

And suddenly, my own home
wasn't safe anymore.

(LIAM LAUGHING)

Th-There was a tiny monster
taking it over.

Now, I did my best
to keep a safe distance.

(YELLS, LAUGHS)

(BABBLING)

But then, one day,

Liam did something
I never expected.

Max.

I love you, Max.

- MAX: And from then on...
- (LAUGHING)

...everything was different.

("I WAS MADE TO LOVE HER"
BY STEVIE WONDER PLAYING)

Ah...

MAX: Duke and I, we became
like role models to him.

(ALL LAUGH)

Like, what can I say?
The-the kid's a fan.

♪ My love blossomed tenderly ♪

♪ My life grew sweeter
through the years ♪

♪ I know that my baby
loves me... ♪

MAX:
We try to be a good influence.

- (MAX WHINES)
- (LIAM LAUGHING)

(LIAM GRUNTS, BABBLES)

Whoa! (GRUNTS)

MAX: And we help him out
whenever we can.

- (LAUGHING)
- ♪ Our love just won't end... ♪

(LAUGHING):
This kid gets us.

- (MAX BARKS)
- (LIAM LAUGHING)

- (MAX AND DUKE BARKING)
- Bubbles!

MAX (CHUCKLING): Yeah, we have fun.

LIAM:
Bubbles!

MAX: And by the way,
I'm still not a kid person.

I'm talking about this kid.

This is my kid.

He's perfect.

And I'm never gonna let
anything bad happen to him.

But I got to say, keeping Liam
safe is a full-time job.

(GASPS) Ah.

(GASPS)
No, no, no, no.

- (CHUCKLING)
- Uh...

LIAM:
Wha...? Ooh.

- (GASPS)
- Aah!

- (LIAM GIGGLES, SQUEALS)
- (PIGEONS COOING)

- (BABBLING)
- All right.

Uh, hey. Uh, hello.

Everything's cool.

Uh, we don't...
we don't want any trouble.

- (KID YELLS)
- (FIRE TRUCK HORN DRONES)

- (STEAM HISSING)
- Liam?

- (GASPS)
- You okay there, buddy?

Was the world always
this dangerous?

(WHIMPERS)

- (THUNDER CRASHES, RUMBLES)
- (GASPS)

(GRUNTING)

- (LIAM MUMBLING)
- (GASPS)

Good doggy.

(THUNDER RUMBLING)

(MAX SIGHS)

♪ ♪

(SNORING)

(MEOWS, SIGHS)

(GRUNTS, YELLS)

- (CHLOE PURRS)
- (GROANS)

(GRUNTS)

(MEOWS)

- (MEOWS LOUDLY)
- (GROANS)

(RAPID GRUNTING)

(GAGGING)

(YELLS)
No, no, no, no, no, no, no!

No.

- (GROANS)
- (MEOWS)

(GRUNTS, SMACKS LIPS)

Morning, Snowball.

Who's the best bunny
in the whole wide world?

- (ELECTRIC TOOTHBRUSH BUZZING)
- (MOLLY GRUNTING)

(SNIFFS)

(FIGHTING ON TV)

MAN (ON TV):
Take that, evildoer.

- Off into the sun with you.
- (EXPLOSION BOOMS)

Yeah!
(MIMICS EXPLOSION)

Ears up.

♪ ♪

(LAUGHS)

(MAKES WHOOSHING SOUND)

I'm calling this meeting

of the Superhero Animal Friends
to order.

Commander Horsey,
please read the minutes

from our last meeting.

Thank you.

Now, remember, everyone,
crime is out there.

We have to be ready.

MOLLY'S DAD:
Come on, Molly, time to go.

Ooh, I'm gonna be late
for school.

Captain Snowball, you're
in charge while I'm gone.

Mwah.

First of all, I want to welcome
White Thunder back

from the washing machine,

who was put in there
with a red blanket

and henceforth
will be known as...

Pink Thunder.

Okay, I'm-a go check
the perimeter.

(JOHN WILLIAMS'
"SUPERMAN THEME" PLAYING)

(YELLS)

(SNIFFS, GRUNTS)

Good morning, New York City!

(SCATTING "SUPERMAN THEME")

MAX:
Snowball.

(CHUCKLES): Hey, Snowball,
what are you doing?

What's it look like I'm doing?

I'm looking for crime,
Tiny Dog.

I'm doing superhero stuff.

Thwip, thwip, thwip,
thwip, thwip. (LAUGHS)

Let me tell you something.

Anybody comes in here
looking for trouble,

oh, they gonna meet
my partners.

I'm talking about
Paw and Order.

(GROWLS, MARTIAL ARTS WHOOPING)

Uh-huh.
Okay, well, you do know

that your owner is just
playing superhero, right?

(LAUGHS): You're just wearing
some superhero pajamas.

Ha! Tiny Dog, you so naive.

Point me in the direction
of any animal

who needs my help,
and stand back.

(GRUNTING)

Death blow!

(MARTIAL ARTS GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

- Okay, okay, uh, I got it.
- (MARTIAL ARTS GRUNTING)

So, uh, did your kid leave
for school yet?

Yeah, yeah, no,
she's got a quiz today.

Advanced spelling.
She'll ace it, though.

You know, she writes
her answers down in ink.

That's how confident she is.

That sounds really smart.

But you know what?
Liam is smart, too.

In fact, I heard Katie say

that Liam's head circumference
is in the 80th percentile.

Oh, that's cool.
That's a lot of head.

Hey, quick question:
Is he still peeing everywhere?

Can't control his bladder?

Yeah, he-he's... he's peeing.

But-but every pet knows,
if you pee on it, you own it.

And Liam,
he's just thinking ahead.

Yeah, well, you still better

train him
before preschool starts.

You don't want Liam
to get a reputation

as one of those pee-pee kids.

(CHUCKLES):
Yeah, totally, like...

Wait, preschool?

Yeah. He's around that age.

The baby bird
is leaving the nest, TD.

No, no.
Baby bird is staying put.

He doesn't need preschool.

He'll, you know...
(GRUNTS)

stay home with-with me,
where it's safe.

DUKE:
Hey, Max.

It's, uh, no big deal...
no need to overreact...

but, uh, Liam just left.

- Wait, what? Where'd he go?
- I don't know.

They never tell the dog
specifics.

Okay, okay, okay.

- (GRUNTING)
- (TOYS SQUEAKING)

- This is Homebase to all units.
- (RADIO BEEPS)

The package has
left the building.

- Does anyone have eyes on him?
- (STATIC CRACKLES)

(STATIC CRACKLES)

I don't see him. Over.

(CHEWING NOISILY)

Well, he's not in
this bag of chips. Over.

Okay. Keep... Wait a minute.

Why would he be
in a bag of chips?

NORMAN:
Homebase, this is Eagle Eye.

Don't you worry.

(WHIMPERS)

I had eyes on the package

as soon as he left
the building. Over.

(BACK-UP WARNING BEEPING)

(GRUNTING)

Subject is safe and sound,

enjoying what looks to be
a cookie shaped like a moose.

- Here you go. Num-num.
- (LIAM LAUGHS)

NORMAN:
No, wait.

It's a reindeer.

Okay. Thanks, Norman.

(GRUNTING)

Scratching again there, buddy.

(GRUNTS) I just...
I really don't like it

when they take him out
without me.

KATIE:
Hey, Duke.

- (TOY SQUEAKING)
- Ooh.

- (DUKE BARKS, PANTS)
- What's this?

Oh, I know this!
It's a ball.

- Go get it.
- (BARKING)

Hey, Maxie.

- What say we go for a walk?
- (GRUNTS)

(PANTING)

You know, I got to say,
this is nice.

- Good to stretch the... legs.
- DOG: (YELPS) No!

- I don't want to go to the vet!
- Hmm. Uh...

The vet? No!
No, no, no, no, no!

Oh, not cool. You tricked me.

Maxie, come on, boy.

(WHIMPERS)

You've been so stressed lately,
but this vet is gonna help you.

- Let's go, buddy.
- (BARKS, WHIMPERS)

(BELL JINGLES)

("GAROTA DE IPANEMA"
PLAYING QUIETLY OVER SPEAKERS)

(KATIE SIGHS, GRUNTS)

- (MAX WHINES)
- All right.

- (BIRD SQUAWKING)
- (MAX WHIMPERS)

Aw.

(WHINES)

- First time here?
- Uh, yeah.

Oh, Dr. Francis is the best
veterinarian in the business.

You're gonna love him.

He specializes
in behavioral disorders.

- B-Behavioral disorders?
- Yeah.

But I don't have
a behavioral disorder.

I-I-I mean... I-I mean,
I worry a little, sure,

but it-it's a...
it's a dangerous world.

You-you'd be crazy
not to... to worry.

Yeah, I'm fine, too.
(CHUCKLES)

It's my human that's nuts.

I mean, you know, I-I bring her
a dead bird, she throws it out.

(CHUCKLES)
I bring her a dead mouse,

right in the garbage!

Is nothing I do good enough
for you, Mother?!

(YOWLS, HISSES)

Okay.

I run, and I run,
and I run, and I run,

and I get out,
and I've gone nowhere.

Nowhere!

Uh...

My owner always says,
"You're such a good dog,"

and I feel like a good dog,

but what if, deep down,
I'm a bad dog?

What if I'm a bad dog?!

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

BOTH:
We start fires.

(SCREAMS, WHIMPERS)

Max?

Come on.

♪ ♪

- (WHIMPERS SOFTLY)
- I know, buddy.

It's just until we can get

this scratching thing
under control, okay?

(GASPS)

(GASPS) Busy Bee!

(GRUNTS)

(GROANS QUIETLY)

(GRUNTS)

(STRAINED GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS, BLOWING)

(GROANS, SIGHS)

(STRAINED GRUNTING)

- DUKE: Max! Max!
- (MAX YELPS)

Max. Max.
You're never gonna believe it.

Oh, hey, I like your cone.

Listen, I heard Chuck tell Liam
that we're going on a trip.

Really?
We're going in the car?

We're going in the car!

- Car, car, car, car, car, car!
- (LAUGHING EXCITEDLY)

Man, you know, life is funny.

One minute, you're getting
fitted for a cone,

and the next,
you get to go in a car!

Oh, I feel like that's very
specific to you, but totally.

- (CHUCKLES) Yeah.
- (MUFFLED): This is incredible!

I'll be right back.

Chloe?

(RATTLING)

Chloe, I'm going on a trip,
and I... Oh.

I was wondering if you'd...

Will you watch my Busy Bee
while I'm gone...?

Oh, hey, Max.
Were you saying something?

(SCOFFS) Yeah.
I was wondering if you could...

Oh... (GROANS) Okay.

Never mind.

What's that stupid thing
on your head?

Gidget?

♪ ♪

Gidget, are you home?

- Gidget?
- (WHOOSHING, STEAM HISSING)

(GASPS)

(GRUNTING)

Mm. Oh, hi, Max.

Do you want to join me?

Oh, you know what,
I really wish I could,

but get this...
I'm going on a trip.

Wow. Really?

Yeah, it's a big deal.

I was wondering,
could you watch my Busy Bee

while I'm gone?

(GASPS)
He is so cute.

I know. It's my favorite toy
in the whole world.

- (CHUCKLES)
- And that little face.

(LAUGHS):
His little face.

Oh, and-and ready?

(SQUEAKS)

Oh, wow. I love him.

Oh, I just...
I just love him immediately.

It's-it's like
we're his parents.

It's like you're the dad
and I'm the mom

and we're in a relationship and
this is our baby. (CHUCKLES)

Well... (SIGHS)

It's exactly like that.
Exactly.

It's not... Okay, yes.

Yes, that's exactly what it is.

Uh, so you'll watch Busy Bee
while I'm gone?

Max, you go, have a great time,

and I want you to know
I have got this.

Thanks, Gidget.
See you later.

I will defend Busy Bee
with my life.

♪ ♪

- (SQUEAKS)
- (LAUGHS)

♪ Well, I'm on my way ♪

♪ I don't know
where I'm going ♪

- (BARKING)
- ♪ I'm on my way... ♪

(LAUGHTER)

- Come on, Duke! Go!
- Okay. (LAUGHS)

Yes, yes, yes.
How we doing, Liam?

- Whoo-hoo!
- "Whoo-hoo" is right.

♪ Seein' me and Julio
down by the schoolyard ♪

- (MAX BARKS)
- (CHUCKLING): Okay.

♪ Seein' me and Julio
down by the schoolyard... ♪

- Yes!
- Here we go!

- Oh, wow!
- Whoo-hoo!

Hey, man.

- I'm in a car!
- Us, too!

I love the car!

- It's the best!
- (LAUGHS) Yes!

♪ Well, I'm on my way ♪

♪ I don't know
where I'm going ♪

- (BARKING)
- ♪ I'm on my way ♪

♪ And I'm taking my time,
but I don't know where ♪

- (LAUGHS) Whee!
- ♪ So good-bye to Rosie ♪

- (LAUGHS)
- ♪ The queen of Corona ♪

♪ Seein' me and Julio
down by the schoolyard ♪

- Okay, come on, guys.
- All right.

- Let's be quick.
- Here we go.

♪ Seein' me and Julio
down by the schoolyard. ♪

(LIAM LAUGHING)

KATIE:
No. No, no, no.

- This way, buddy. Come on.
- No!

(SNORING QUIETLY)

(WHIMPERS)

(CHUCKLES)

(LAUGHS, SIGHS)

♪ ♪

(BUSY BEE SQUEAKS)

(BIRDS SQUAWKING)

- (BUSY BEE SQUEAKING)
- (BOTH LAUGHING)

(SQUEAKING)

(BOTH CHUCKLING)

BOTH:
Mm...

(GRUNTS, GASPS)

Oh, no! Oh, no!

Oh, no, no, no, no!

(GASPS)

No, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no.

(GRUNTING)

No...!

(BUSY BEE WHISTLING, SQUEAKING)

Gidget, what have you done?

(PANTING, GRUNTING)

Huh?

ANNOUNCER (ON TV):
La Pasión de la Pasión.

WOMAN (ON TV):
Why? Why?!

(GASPS) Aha.

- Okay.
- (SQUEAKS)

Hmm?

(SQUEAKING)

(MEOWS)

(CATS YOWLING, HISSING)

(LONG SQUEAK)

(CATS MEOWING)

(SHUDDERS)

(SQUEAKING)

- (BUSY BEE HONKS)
- (YOWLS)

(BOTH CATS SHRIEK)

(BUSY BEE SQUEAKING)

(CATS SHRIEKING)

(SHRIEKING, SQUEAKING CONTINUE)

(HISSES)

(CATS YOWLING)

Oh, dear, sweet Busy Bee.

(LONG, DISTANT SQUEAK)

You know, I'm-a be the first
bunny with washboard glutes.

I'm not even sure
what glutes are, but...

mine are gonna be shredded.

- (STRAINED GRUNTING)
- Oh, yeah, yeah.

That's, uh...
that's fascinating.

Let me tell you something.

(GRUNTS)
Criminals are gonna take

one good look at my glutes...
(EXHALES)

and they just gonna give up.
(GRUNTS)

(YELLS) Okay, this is obviously
glued to the floor.

- DAISY: Excuse me, rabbit, cat.
- (VASE SHATTERS)

Do any of you know
Captain Snowball?

Yeah, uh, ye-yes.

- Yes, we do.
- And here we go.

Oh, good.

My name is Daisy, and I really
got to talk to him.

A poor, defenseless animal
needs saving.

Wha...? Are you saying...?

Yes. I need Captain Snowball
for a...

(WHISPERS):
top secret rescue.

All right, well, I got to go.

But nice meeting you, uh...
What was it again?

Okay, you don't listen.

- It's Daisy.
- Whatever. Okay, I...

I got to get the dude to get
the stuff to do the things.

I got to... Bye-bye.

Mm-hmm.
That was weird.

Oh, sister,
it's gonna get way weirder.

♪ ♪

(GRUNTING)

It's Snow time, baby.

♪ ♪

(GASPS)

(SINISTER LAUGHING, GROWLING)

Help!

Anybody hungry?

Ha!

(ALL LAUGH, THEN GASP)

(GRUNTING)

(YELLS)

(GROANING)

(YELLING WILDLY)

Oh, Snowball.

(SNOWBALL YELLING
AND GRUNTING IN OTHER ROOM)

Uh, is he okay?

Not in any way. No.

(SNOWBALL GRUNTING)

Hello, citizens.

Who is that?
Mm-mm-mm.

I'm Captain Snowball.

I hear one of you
needs my help.

Ooh, that's me.

Ah, very good.

New dog, tell me your story.

Okay.
Well, it all began

when I was on my way back
from vacation.

DAISY:
Our humans were safely stowed

in the overhead compartment,

and we were going through
our owners' stuff.

(CHUCKLES) Humans always
blame the airline.

What do you got?

I'll trade you two socks
for a pair of workout shorts.

Are they clean or dirty?

They ain't clean.

(SNIFFS)

- Nope. They nasty.
- (CLATTERING)

DAISY:
And then I heard a noise.

- (GRUNTING)
- (CLATTERING CONTINUES)

(GRUNTS)

(TIGER GRUNTS)

Now, I don't speak
wild animal...

- (MOANS)
- ...but from what I gathered,

he was a scared,
adorable tiger cub named Hu.

This poor baby kitty was
being held against his will.

Whoa.

- That is unbelievable.
- I know, right?

No, I mean I literally
don't believe a word of it.

No offense.
Or do take offense.

I'm good either way.

Um, pardon me.
Offense is very much taken.

That story happened,
and it gets worse.

After the plane landed,
I saw Hu again.

- (HU MOANING)
- Use your no-good clown muscles and push!

DAISY: He was being brought
to his new owner.

- And this guy...
- Time is rubles!

Y'all, this guy was pure,

concentrated circus evil.

That tiger needs
Captain Snowball.

- Daisy, let's go.
- Yeah!

(GRUNTS)
Let's free that tiger.

- Or die trying.
- Well, I mean...

- I mean, we might.
- Um...

- Probably you.
- Huh?

You're wearing a bright suit.
Everyone's gonna notice you.

- I'll be fine.
- (WHIMPERS)

♪ ♪

(SHEEP BLEATING)

(CHICKENS CLUCKING)

Hey, guys, we're here.

(SIGHS) Yay.

(DUKE SNORING)

(CHICKEN CLUCKING)

(CHUCKLES) Hey there.

There's Uncle Shep.

- Welcome to the farm.
- (CHUCK AND UNCLE SHEP LAUGH)

- Where's my little man?
- (LIAM LAUGHING)

- (BIRDS SQUAWKING)
- (SHEEP BLEATING)

- (CATTLE MOOING)
- (ROOSTER CROWING)

(LAUGHING):
Oh, wow!

Look at this place.

- Yeah, it's... (GASPS)
- (DUKE LAUGHS)

- (CHICKENS CLUCKING)
- (LAUGHS) Oh, so many smells

I have never smelled before.

My nose is so confused.

And happy! (LAUGHS)

Come on, Max.
Let's go explore.

(LAUGHS):
Oh!

- Yeah!
- Uh, wait up.

(CHUCKLES) Oh!

Hey, cow. Moo.

(BELL CLANGING)

You're a cow.
You're supposed to moo.

- (DUKE LAUGHS)
- Woof, woof.

What?

Oh, I'm a dog.

I'm wagging my tail
like an idiot.

(PANTING)

(CHUCKLES):
Oh, okay. Dude, not cool.

Oh, are you gonna throw a ball?
Oh, please throw a ball.

And I will chase it
because my brain

is the size of a rat turd.

(LAUGHS)
Okay. Yeah, I get it.

- (MAX SIGHS)
- You made your point.

- Yeah, yeah.
- Oh, look. I'm peeing on a tree.

- I now own this tree.
- Okay. Yeah, great.

- Leaving now. All right.
- I guess I'll just stare

at the door
until you come back!

MAX:
Oh, I miss New York.

DUKE: Maybe a break from
the city is just what you need.

- This place is...
- (RUMBLING)

Wha...?

♪ ♪

(ROARS)

- (SCREAMING)
- (GOBBLING)

(MAX PANTING, GASPING)

MAX: No, no, no, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no. (SCREAMS)

Duke, what did I do?
What did I do?

(MAX SOBBING)

(HOWLS)

- (GOBBLES)
- (MOOING)

Huh?

(GROANING SIGH)

(GOBBLING)

Whoa.

- (RAPID JINGLING)
- (MAX GASPS)

Dinner's on!

("WHITE RABBIT"
BY JEFFERSON AIRPLANE PLAYING)

(WHISPERING):
Chloe? I need your help.

Chloe.

- Oh. Uh... oh.
- (PURRING QUIETLY)

Uh, Chloe?

- Chloe, are you okay?
- Shh.

Sorry. Uh, I'm-I'm just...
I'm... (SIGHS)

Real quick... why is there
a lampshade on your head?

(CHUCKLES)
Listen, Gidget, baby,

I got to be honest with you.

My owner might have given me
a little bit of catnip.

(CHLOE CHUCKLING)

(GRUNTS, CHUCKLES)

- (SIGHS)
- Oh, okay. Gotcha.

That's great. Um, listen.

It is great, Gidget.

Everything is great...

- All right.
- (PURRS)

- Do you hear that? (PURRS)
- Hear what?

It's like... it's like
a tiny... like a tiny motor.

It's like a humming sound.
(PURRS)

I'm not... don't know
what you're ta...

Oh. Chloe, you're purring.

(CHUCKLES) That's you.

What? That's me?

Like, as in the sound
is coming from inside of me?

- Yep.
- Oh.

I wonder what other sounds
I could make.

(MEOWS)

It-it's just, Max trusted me

to look after his Busy Bee,
and then...

(HIGH-PITCHED PURRING)

(GRUNTS)
Chloe, would you listen?

(LONG, WARBLING YOWL)

Wow. Please stop.

(LONG, DEEP YOWL)

Are you finished?

(HIGH-PITCHED SQUEAK)

This is important.

I lost Busy Bee.

I got to get it back,
but to do that...

Chloe...

(SIGHS)
I need you to teach me

the way of the cat.

(GRUNTS)

Here we go.
I'm gonna get you. (GRUNTS)

(CONTINUES GRUNTING)

- (BARKING)
- (QUIET CHATTER, LAUGHTER)

Max, come on.
Try to catch a firefly.

I'm just...
That sounds great,

but I-I think Liam
wants me near him.

You-you know,
he's a little freaked out

being in this weird place.

I think he'll be okay.

LIAM:
And this one is a jumper.

- (PANTING)
- O-Okay.

- (LAUGHING)
- Just one.

(GRUNTING)

Yes, I...

(GROANS, SOBS)

Oh.

(BABBLING)

(DOG GROWLING)

(YELLS)

Oh. Hello.

Dog's got two things
in this life:

his water bowl and his dignity.

You take one,
you take the other.

I, uh... I-I didn't know
this was your bowl.

What?
The cone blocking your view?

It's got my name on the side.

We are so sorry, Mr. Chicken.

Name's not Chicken.

Do I look like
a chicken to you?

- No. No, sir.
- No, not-not even a little.

- Name's Rooster.
- MAX: Oh.

Okay.
I-I'm Max, and this is...

Hey, what's that kid doing
in the cage?

There something wrong with him?
He got the fever?

- (LIAM LAUGHING)
- (FROG CROAKS)

Uh, that's-that's Liam.

He-he likes to run.

So let him run.

Well, Liam's super fast.

(CHUCKLES): We-we-we blink,
and he's up a tree.

So then your kid's up a tree.
What's the problem?

Well, he could fall.

- He might.
- And then he hurts himself.

Oh, so he got really high up
in this hypothetical tree?

- (STAMMERS, SIGHS)
- Kid gets hurt,

he learns not to do it again.

You know how many
electric cords I've chewed?

Like, multiple cords?

One.

It shocked me.

I walked backwards for a week,

but I never
chewed a cord again.

Well, that is great for you.

And-and it explains a lot,

but I like to protect Liam
from... everything.

(SNICKERS) Well, that's you,
and you're wrong.

(SCOFFS)
Can you believe that guy?

Yeah, he was cool!

No, he wasn't.

I know.
He wasn't cool at all.

KATIE:
No, I'll do the dishes.

Come on.

CHUCK:
Let's get this guy inside.

KATIE:
Thanks.

Whoa. Hold up there.
Dogs sleep outside.

- Uh, pardon?
- Huh?

Whoa. Whoa, whoa, whoa.
Okay, wait, wait.

L-L-Let's talk about this
like rational... (GRUNTS)

All right, we're here.

In record time, too,
thanks to the Bunnymobile.

- Oh, yeah! (GRUNTS)
- (THUNDER RUMBLING)

Stealth mode.

Let's go!

♪ ♪

(GRUNTING)

(YELLS, GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS, BABBLES)

(GASPS)

- (THUNDER CRASHES)
- (SCREAMING)

You are jumpy.

I meant... (YELLS)
That's cool.

Or... (YELLS)

Look at that thing
I'm not scared of right there.

Or... (YELLS) There's a
candy wrapper on the ground.

See? It's just a thing I do.

- (YELLS QUIETLY)
- (WHIP CRACKS)

- (GASPS)
- SERGEI: Come on, you stupid tiger!

- (WHIP CRACKING)
- DAISY: There he is.

- Let's go.
- (GRUNTS)

SERGEI:
We don't have entire night.

(WHIP CRACKING)

- (HU MOANS)
- Let's go!

(MOANS)

You're wasting Sergei's time.

(MOANING)

We got to do something.

- (WHIP CRACKS)
- (BOTH GASP)

- (GASPING, YOWLING)
- (MEN CHATTERING URGENTLY)

- Okay, all right, all right.
- Whoa, whoa.

- Wait.
- (CHATTER CONTINUES)

SNOWBALL:
Come on.

(WHIMPERS, MOANS)

We try again tomorrow.

- If tiger does not do trick...
- (MONKEY HOOTS)

- tiger will become rug.
- (MONKEY GRUNTS)

(GROANS QUIETLY)

Do not let tiger
out of your sight.

(WOLVES GROWLING QUIETLY)

(MOANS)

It's okay, Hu.

It's me, Daisy, from the plane.

(PURRS)

(DAISY CHUCKLES)

Hey.
Step away from the tiger.

- Mind your business, wolf.
- (THUNDER RUMBLING)

(ALL GROWLING)

Oh!

(GRUNTING, YELPING)

(WOLVES GROWLING)

Huh?

(GRUNTS, YELLS)

(BARKING, GROWLING)

(YELLING)

(GRUNTS)

(GROWLING)

- (GASPS, YELLS)
- (WOLF BARKS)

(GRUNTS)

Ha-ha!

(YELLS)

(GROWLS)

(SNOWBALL WHIMPERING, PANTING)

(GAME MUSIC PLAYS, BELL RINGS)

- (SCREAMS, GRUNTS)
- (BELL DINGS)

Whoa! (SCREAMS)

(YELLS) No!

- (LOW GROWLING)
- (THUNDER RUMBLES)

- (SCREAMS)
- (GROWLING)

(WHIMPERS)

- (LAUGHS, SCREAMS)
- (WOLF SNARLS)

(YELLS, GRUNTS)

(WHIMPERING)

Oh, gonna die,
gonna die, gonna die!

- (YELLS, GASPS)
- (RIDE CLUNKING)

Whoa! (GRUNTS)

- (BUZZING)
- (GROWLS)

- Huh?
- (THUNDER RUMBLING)

(MUFFLED):
I got the keys. Let's go.

What?

- (SPITS)
- (FEEDBACK SQUEALS)

(OVER SPEAKER):
I said, "I got the keys."

Come on, let's go.

Uh, all right.
Yeah, of course.

(RIDE WHIRRING, CLACKING)

(SHUDDERS, GRUNTS)

(DOOR CREAKS)

(HU PURRING)

(DAISY AND SNOWBALL CHUCKLE)

Heck yeah!

BOTH:
Boom.

You know what I learned today?

- Hmm?
- Wolves are jerks.

(SNOWBALL LAUGHS)

(WOLVES GROWLING QUIETLY)

(SNARLS, GROWLS)

(INSECTS CHIRPING, OWL HOOTING)

(DUKE SNORING QUIETLY)

(MAX WHIMPERS)

(GRUNTS, GROANS)

- (WHISPERS): Duke.
- (SNORING CONTINUES)

Psst. Duke.

I think we should
check on Liam.

- Duke.
- I finally caught you, tail.

- (GROANS)
- (SNORING CONTINUES)

(SIGHS)

(SIGHS)

- (TWITTERING NEARBY)
- Huh? What's that?

- (TWITTERING)
- (OWL HOOTING)

- (WHIMPERS)
- (CAWING)

Okay. Okay.

(CROAKS)

- (HOOTING)
- What?

- (CHITTERING)
- (BELLOWING)

- (WHIMPERS)
- (CHIRPING)

- (SNORING)
- (FRIGHTENED WHIMPER)

- (MUNCHING LOUDLY)
- (GOBBLING)

- (PASSES GAS)
- (HOWLING)

(SCREAMS)

(SIGHS)

(LOW GROWLING)

(RUSTLING IN GRASS)

(GASPS)

- (GROWLING)
- (SCREAMS)

Wait, wait.
Wait, wait, wait, wait.

No, no, please,
you don't want to eat me.

I'm skin and bones. No, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no...

- (WHIMPERING)
- (ROOSTER BARKING)

- (GASPS, WHIMPERS)
- (ROOSTER BARKING)

(FOX WHIMPERING)

Uh... (CHUCKLES) Thanks.

He, uh...
he got the jump on me.

(CHUCKLES):
I guess he...

I couldn't see him
because of the cone.

- Then get rid of the cone.
- Oh, man, I would.

(CHUCKLES): I would, but
my therapist says I need it.

Oh. Oh, okay.

- Well, that makes sense.
- (MAX CHUCKLES)

Yeah, it's a medical device.

(CHUCKLES):
These doctors.

- (ROOSTER GROWLS)
- (MAX YELLS)

There.

You're cured.

Hallelujah.

Not a fan.

I am not a fan of the farm.

CHLOE:
Okay, tail.

(CHUCKLES)

Ears.

- And voilà.
- Whoa.

Gidget, you look so much
like a cat, it's crazy.

- (CHUCKLES)
- Yeah. Who knew?

- So easy.
- Whoa, whoa, whoa.

Hold on.
It's gonna take more

than fake ears
and a sock, okay?

You got to learn
how to act like a cat.

- Okay.
- Okay, Gidge, I'm gonna throw

some situations at you, and
you're just gonna, you know...

- you're gonna react like a cat.
- Gotcha.

Fetch.

- Yes!
- I'm gonna get it!

- (DOGS BABBLING)
- Gidget, stay.

- But...
- No.

Cats don't care about fetching.
Fetching is for dopes.

- MEL: Yes! (LAUGHS)
- (BUDDY PANTING)

You're above that,
because you are a cat.

GIDGET:
Mm.

(YELLS, GRUNTS)

(SCREAMS, YELPS)

- (GROANS)
- You see, dogs land

like the clumsy oafs they are.

Meanwhile, cats land
on their feet.

Really?
How do they... (SCREAMS)

(GRUNTS, GASPS)

Yes! I did it!

I landed on my feet.

- Yes!
- (MUFFLED): Nice work.

(WHIMPERS) Seriously, guys,
I think I broke something.

You gotta.
It's a fact of life.

Absolutely not.
Never gonna happen.

Guys, I found treats!

- (STIFLED GAGGING)
- Oh, Mel. Ugh.

Okay, Gidget, eat Sweetpea.

- What?
- (TWEETING)

Cats eat birds.
It's nature.

- Yeah, I'm gonna pass.
- No, no, no, no.

You used your one pass
on the litter box,

so you have to do this.

- But...
- (MOCKING): B-B-B-But... Do it.

You're seriously gonna
make her eat Sweetpea?

Oh, no, no, no. Of course not.
I'm just freaking her out.

- (SWEETPEA SQUEALS)
- (GASPS)

Okay. What's next?

Gidget, no. That's...

Bad dog. Bad cat-dog.

(RETCHES, GAGS)

(SWEETPEA TWITTERING)

(GRUNTS) Sorry.

- Up.
- (GIDGET GRUNTS)

And tail in the face.

Okay, touch the butt
to the cup.

(MEL LAUGHING)

Walk on keyboard.

There you go.

Coffee on computer.

- (ELECTRICAL CRACKLING)
- And down.

- (GIDGET GRUNTS)
- Nice.

- Yes, you got it.
- (SWEETPEA CHIRPS)

Gidget, you're as close
to a cat as a dog can get.

(LAUGHING)

Cool.
Now turn me into a chinchilla.

Can you do that?

- (CLICKING TONGUE)
- (BUDDY CHUCKLES)

("FANTASTIC VOYAGE"
BY COOLIO PLAYING)

Oh, yeah.

First mission in the bag.

It was easy.

Too easy? Maybe.

Maybe it was.

(HU YOWLS)

♪ Come along and ride
on a fantastic voyage... ♪

Hey, big fella.

What'd I do?
Oh, I just rescued a tiger.

No, I'm not even
trying to brag.

I'm just telling you
what happened.

See, that's the thing
about being awesome.

When you awesome
and you just tell the truth,

it sounds like you bragging.

Let me know when you finish
tooting your horn,

'cause we got to find
a safe place for Hu.

Uh, what?
What are you talking about?

- (CLATTERING)
- (YELLS)

- (MEOWS)
- Oh, yeah.

Oh, that guy. Yeah.

Uh... yeah.

Oh! I got it.

I know a guy whose owner
is never home.

Yeah, we can just
take him there.

Sounds like a plan.

Superbunny powers, activate.

♪ ♪

Wait out here, buddy.

(GRUNTING)

We'll be right back, okay?

(PURRS QUIETLY)

POPS (MILITARY CADENCE):
♪ I'm a puppy cute and sweet ♪

♪ Beg real nice
and get a treat. ♪

Hip, hip, hip,

- hip, hip, hip.
- (PUPPIES GRUNTING)

- Hey, Pops.
- POPS: Who-who's that?

- (PUPPIES CHATTERING)
- Bunny, bunny, bunny, bunny!

Oh, uh... (SCREAMS)

I am a hero.
I need you to respect that.

All right, all right.

Ten-hut!

(SNOWBALL GROANS)

Puppy school is in session.

Puppy school?

Now the daily pledge.

- I promise...
- PUPPIES: I promise...

- ...to listen to Pops...
- ...to listen to Pops...

...and learn
how to be adorable,

wide-eyed and loving...

...and learn how to be
adorable, wide-eyed

and loving...

...to get what I want,
when I want it.

...to get what I want,

when I want it.

Okay, now, Pop's quiz.

Myron has hidden socks
all over the room.

Now, what do we do
with human socks?

Ooh, me, me.

Go ahead, Princess.

We hide them, Mr. Pops.

Correct-a-rooney.

And why do we hide them?

Not knowing where one sock is
messes with the humans' minds.

Heck yes, it does.
Always keep 'em guessing.

Now, go find those socks.

What? Okay, all right.

Okay. Hey, Pops.

What...? Okay, that's enough.

Hey. What's going on?

Yeah. My owner got a new puppy.

My name's Tiny.

Nobody cares!

I was teaching Tiny
how not to be anyone's sucker.

Word got out,
suddenly every puppy

in the tristate area
is scratching at my door.

Yeah. Oh.

Professor Pops?

Yes, Pickles?

I got to make a poop.

Oh. You know where to do that.
Find a shoe.

- (PICKLES PANTING)
- (CHUCKLES)

(LAUGHS)
This is so sweet.

- Yeah, they're good...
- (HU GROWLS)

Holy cheese and crackers!
What is that?

Myron, horn!

- (SQUEAKS)
- (AIR HORN BLARES)

(GASPS, GROWLS)

No, no, no.
No, no, look, look. It's okay.

This beautiful creature is Hu.

And the good news...

is he's staying with you.

Get that tiger out of here
before he does any more damage.

But we don't have
anywhere else to take him.

- Well, he ain't staying here.
- PUPPIES: Kitty, kitty,

kitty, kitty, kitty, kitty,
kitty, kitty!

No, what are you...
Don't get attached.

That thing is out.

PUPPIES:
Aw.

Oh, Pickles.

Did you poop in a shoe?

I pooped in a boot.

Your owner won't find it
for weeks.

(GIGGLING)

(POPS MOANS, SNIFFLES)

Are you crying?

What? No. You're crying!

(SNIFFLES) But I'm just
so proud of Pickles.

- (POPS CLEARS THROAT)
- PRINCESS: Mr. Pops,

please, can the tiger
stay with us?

Please?

- PUPPIES: Please.
- (WHIMPERING)

(GRUNTS) Myron, look away.

(WHIMPERS)

(HU PURRS)

POPS:
Oh, flap-doodle.

Okay, fine. One night.

(PUPPIES CHEERING)

- I taught you guys too well.
- (MYRON SNIFFLES)

(MYRON BLOWS, SNIFFLES)

(CHITTERING)

(HOOTS, CHITTERS)

(GRUNTS ANGRILY)

(MEN AND WOLVES WHIMPERING)

I give wolves one job.

Guard white tiger.

- And you wolves, you blow it.
- (WOLVES WHIMPER)

Maybe I should make
juggling monkey

- head of security.
- (HOOTS)

- What say you, Little Sergei?
- (SQUEALS EXCITEDLY)

Yes, you are so smart.

And then there's this one.

- You're the worst wolf ever.
- (WHIMPERS)

I swear, I...
(GASPS)

(WHIMPERS, GROWLS)

What this?

(SNIFFS)

- This from thief of tiger.
- (SNIFFING)

- Yes, smell.
- (WOLVES SNIFFING)

- (WOLVES BARKING)
- (SERGEI CHUCKLES)

(WOLVES SNARLING, BARKING)

You bring that tiger back.

And if you don't, that one...

(WHIMPERS)

...will be a new coat
for Little Sergei.

(LITTLE SERGEI HOOTING)

(ALL HOWLING)

(SNARLING)

♪ ♪

(MUNCHING LOUDLY)

Oh, this is good.

You should really try this. Mm!

- (LIAM BABBLING)
- KATIE: Mmm.

- CHUCK: So nice.
- KATIE: So fresh.

(CHUCKLES) Max.

Book, book, book.

We're turning it again.

Um, I'm sorry, Liam.
We can't read.

Well, wait a sec.
There's no reason

we can't figure this one out
together, right?

- (LIAM CHUCKLES)
- This first page,

there's a little girl
in a red hood,

skipping through
the forest with...

(GASPS) with some food.

- Look at that... she's got food.
- (CHUCKLES)

Om, nom, nom.

MAX:
And look at that...

she brought the food over to...

Hmm. Say, who is that?

Oh! Looks like her grandma.

Oh, I'll bet you're right.

Oh, that is sweet. She...

(DUKE AND MAX SCREAM)

So, Grandma had a pet wolf.

They had a great visit.
The little girl went home.

No one got eaten.
The end.

- (LAUGHS)
- ROOSTER: No, no, no, no.

That's not how the story goes.

(GROANS)
We got this, thanks.

That wolf was gonna eat
the little girl.

Nope! Thank you, Rooster.

- He already ate Grandma.
- (MAX GROANS)

ROOSTER: And then he assumed
the old lady's identity.

(GASPS) No.

Wha...? Hey.
Don't freak out my kid.

Take that, Mr. Wolfy.
(BLOWS RASPBERRIES)

Kid seems fine to me.

You're the one
who's scared of everything.

I am not. I'm-I'm...
Tell him, Duke.

Yeah, yeah.
Max isn't scared of everything.

I-I... I can think of, um...

Uh, yeah.
Yeah, well, there's a few...

- there's a few things.
- Okay, thanks.

You bet.

♪ ♪

- (TV PLAYING QUIETLY)
- (CATS MEWING)

Okay, this is it.

- You good to go?
- Roger that.

(GRUNTS)

(YELPS, GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

(YOWLING, MEOWING)

(WHIMPERS)

That's a good kitty.

(CAT GROWLS)

- (HISSES)
- (CAT WHIMPERS)

MAN (ON TV):
Maria, your face,

- it wears a thousand sorrows.
- (CAT YOWLING)

(WHIMPERING)

- (BUSY BEE SQUEAKS)
- (GASPS)

- GIDGET: Busy Bee.
- (SQUEAKS, WHISTLES)

(GRUNTING)

- (YELPS, GRUNTS)
- (CAT MEOWS)

(STRAINED GRUNTING)

(GASPS)

Oh, boy.

(SNORING)

(EXHALES SHARPLY)

Okay, come on, Gidget.

- (SQUEAKING)
- (GIDGET GRUNTS)

(GASPS)

- (STRAINED GRUNT, GASPS)
- (SQUEAKS LOUDLY)

Huh? (ROARS)

(GIDGET GASPS, SQUEALS)

Norman, now!

NORMAN:
You got it, sister.

(HIGH-PITCHED WHIRRING)

Huh?

(MUFFLED YELLING, SHRIEKING)

(GRUNTING)

(ROARS)

- (GRUNTS) Busy Bee!
- (CREAKING)

(SQUEAKING)

(ROARS)

(CATS YOWLING)

Whoa. Okay.
Uh, time for plan B.

Engaging plan B.

(ALL GASP)

(GRUNTS)

(SWALLOWS)

(WHIMPERS)
She caught the red dot.

ALL:
Huzzah!

(GRUNTS)

("LA MARSEILLAISE" PLAYS)

(BUSY BEE SQUEAKS)

She is the Chosen One.

All hail the queen.

CATS:
Hail the queen!

All hail Queen Gidget.

- (NORMAN SCREAMS)
- (CAT YOWLS)

(BARKING)

(CATTLE SNORTING)

(BARKING)

(MOOING)

(BARKING)

(BARKING, MOOING CONTINUE)

Hyah!

(BARKS)
Get in! Faster!

Max, did you see that?

- Uh, yeah.
- So cool.

Oh, it's not that big a deal.

(ROOSTER GRUNTING)

Move. Hyah!

Move it!

(CHUCKLES):
Oh, man.

- (PIG SNORTING)
- (CHICKS CHEEPING)

Hey, look.
That big guy got out.

We better get Rooster.

No. No, no, no need for that.

I can handle it.

Hey, mister.

Ba-Back inside.

- Come on.
- Yep.

- (STRAINED GRUNTING)
- You're doing great.

- Go underneath him.
- (MAX GRUNTS)

Let's go. (SIGHS)

I think he moved a little.

Don't you...
don't you ignore me.

(GRUNTS)

Ah, come on.

- (GRUNTING)
- DUKE: Yep, uh-huh.

Now go and do the front.
No, no, back.

Now go to the side.

Uh, Max, Rooster nips at
the cows to get 'em to move.

Really? (CHUCKLES)
That sounds drastic, but...

okay, pig, you asked for this.

- (SQUEALING WILDLY)
- Oh.

(SCREAMING)

(GRUNTS)

(SHEEP BLEATING)

(GROANS WEAKLY)

- Hey, Max. You okay?
- Yeah.

- (GROANS WEAKLY)
- What's going on?

Don't worry, I'm-I'm fine.

You let all the sheep out.

- I did?
- Hey!

Get back in there!
Come on.

Wait a minute. Where's Cotton?

Oh, he went into the woods.

(SIGHS)

- You.
- Uh...

Come with me.

Wh-Where are we going?

We're gonna go get Cotton back.

Oh. Great.

- Come on, Duke.
- Oh.

- Duke, sit.
- Yep.

This is just you and me.

Oh, boy.

Come on.

(CHUCKLES) Super.

- Good-bye!
- (MAX WHIMPERS)

(CROAKS)

Cotton, where are you?

(GRUNTING)

Come on.

Hurry up!

Uh...

Okay.

Just jump.

(WHIMPERS, GRUNTS)

(YELLS) Ow, ow, ow!

(WHIMPERS)

Ow, ow!

(GROANING)

Scent's getting stronger.

Cotton's close.
(GRUNTS)

(EXHAUSTED SIGH)

Oh, boy.

(GROANS)

I can do this.

(PANTING):
I got it, I got it.

(SCREAMS)

(GROANS)

(GRUNTING)

(SIGHING, PANTING)

Rooster, you-you know what?
Just... just go on without me.

- Oh, you're not giving up.
- Yeah, but...

- (COTTON BLEATING)
- Follow me.

(PANTING)

♪ ♪

(MAX PANTING)

- Cotton, what are you doing down there?
- (MAX GASPING)

There's apples in this tree.

All right, just don't panic.

MAX:
Oh, man.

Max is coming down to save you.

Wait, what?

That tree can't support
my weight.

You get down there.

♪ ♪

(BIRD SCREECHES)

I-I-I can't do that.

Sure, you can.

Think of this as a... as a...
as a game of fetch.

Now, go fetch the sheep.

No. No, no, no, no, no.

It-it's too high,
and-and I'm-I'm...

I'm too afraid.

Max, here's a trick.

The first step
of not being afraid

is acting like
you're not afraid.

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

So, are you scared?

No.

Are you scared?

No! No, I'm not.

Now you're talking.

Go get Cotton.

Hurry.

(SIGHS NERVOUSLY)
Okay, okay.

Hey.

(INHALES DEEPLY)

(EXHALES)

Okay.

(GASPS, SHUDDERS)

(WHIMPERING)

(YELLS) Whoa!

(GRUNTS) Listen, uh, Cotton,

walk toward me, okay?

Okay, sure.

But my leg is stuck.

(STAMMERING):
His leg is stuck.

Well, unstuck it.

- Uh... (WHIMPERS)
- (ROCKS FALLING)

(YELLS, WHIMPERS)

(TREE CRACKLING)

- Hold on.
- COTTON: Whee!

(MAX WHIMPERS)

Okay, Cotton, listen,
we got to... (YELLS)

Hurry up!

- (GRUNTING)
- Ooh!

(STRAINED GRUNTING)

COTTON:
Ow! Whoa!

(MAX GRUNTS, YELLS)

- (MAX GASPS)
- Come on.

(GRUNTING RAPIDLY)

(STRAINED GRUNTING)

(GASPING)

(SCREAMS)

(WHIMPERING)

(SCREAMS, GRUNTS)

(WHIMPERING)

(PANTING):
Okay.

We're... we're alive.
(SIGHS)

- Yep.
- (LAUGHING)

Yeah, we... Oh, no!

Oof. Yeah, we are.

- (SHEEP BLEATING)
- DUKE: Mm.

- (DISTANT BARKING)
- (GASPS) Max?

(SLURPS)

♪ ♪

(COTTON CHUCKLING)

Max.

Get back in your pen, Cotton.

- Okay.
- No. Other way, Cotton.

Okay.
(HUMS A TUNE)

So, how did it go?
What-what happened?

You-you know, it was...
it was pretty intense.

Tell him, Rooster.

You know, some stuff happened.

Now it's over.

(CHUCKLES):
Wow!

He can really tell a story.

Right?

(GROWLS)

(SNIFFING)

We are getting closer.

(WOLVES GROWLING)

So there I was,
surrounded by nasty wolves.

You asking, was I scared?

No one asked anything.

You just walked up to us
and started talking.

I was scared.

But I saved that tiger anyway.

Am I a hero?

That's not for me to say.

Boo-Boo.

- Boo-Boo, are you listening?
- I am. (GRUNTS)

Stop digging for a second,
Boo-Boo,

and maybe you'll learn
something.

As I was saying...

Wo-Wo... W-W-Wolf.

Duh. That's what I've been
talking about... wolves.

(WOLVES GROWLING)

- (GASPS)
- (YELLS)

(SNARLING)

(PANTING)

(GRUNTING)

(GROWLS)

(MAN GASPS)

(SCREAMING)

(BIKE CRASHES, RIDER GROANS)

(GRUNTS)

(SNIFFING)

There.

(WOLVES GROWLING)

- (BARKS, GROWLS)
- (GASPS)

(GASPS)

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

Where is the tiger?

Oh. There he is!

Huh?

What?

Hey!

So long, suckers!

(BLOWS RASPBERRIES)

- ♪ ♪
- (VIDEO GAME SOUND EFFECTS)

Ha! Take that!

Now, this is training.

Okay?
Keeping my reflexes sharp.

Ha! Flawless victory.

Oh!

You were just beaten
by a rabbit.

- You don't even know it.
- (BELL DINGS)

Ooh, my pizza rolls.

(BLINDS RUSTLING)

What's that?

(YELLS) Oh.

Oh, hello, Snowball.

Hey, Pops.

What's, uh...
what's-what's going on?

Oh, you know, just returning
your giant tiger.

Oh, uh, fun fact:

- He trashed my apartment!
- (HU MOANS)

This thing ate a flat-screen
like it was a pita chip.

For shame!

Oh, now you've done it.

Pickles is pissed.

Uh... are you sure
that's my tiger?

'Cause I don't...
I don't know if that's...

- Let's go, class.
- (PRINCESS SCOFFS)

Ah, come on, old man,
don't do this.

Wait, wait, wait, wait,
wait, wait.

- Please.
- (HU MOANS HAPPILY)

Hey.

How you been?

(SNIFFING)

(PURRS)

(YAWNS)

I'm-a go get back
to my pizza rolls,

and I'll come back and check
on you in a bit, okay?

(HU MOANS)

Problem solved.

- GIDGET: Snowball?
- (GASPS)

Puffy Dog?

What are you doing
in Max's apartment?

Nothing.
Why are you hanging out

with every cat in the universe?

(CATS MEOWING)

Oh, you know, just because.

Mm, okay.

Okay.

Okay.

(DISTANT BIRDCALLS)

(GASPS)

Uh, hey, Rooster.

Hey, kid. Good job today.

Yeah? Well, I-I got to admit,
I feel pretty good.

I'm not so nervous
around the farm or you or...

the turkey who won't stop
following me!

(GOBBLES)

Yeah, I see you, you weirdo.

(CHUCKLES, GRUNTS)

Anyway, I heard Katie say
we're leaving tomorrow, and...

- (ROOSTER HOWLING)
- Oh. Uh...

You want me to, uh...
you want me to go?

(CHUCKLES):
No. Just what we do out here.

You want to join me?

Uh, yeah. Okay. Cool.

(GRUNTING)

(ROOSTER CHUCKLES)

You ready to try?

(HOWLS)

(MAX HOWLS WEAKLY, SIGHS)

Come on, kid. Deeper.
Deep from your gut.

Right. O-Okay, got it.

(BOTH HOWL)

(CHUCKLES) There you go.

(MAX CHUCKLES)

(BOTH HOWLING)

(ROOSTER CROWING)

(ROOSTER TAKES A DEEP BREATH)

(SNORTS, GRUNTS)

Wow.

(SIGHS)

- (DUKE BARKING)
- LIAM: Whee!

(KATIE AND LIAM LAUGHING)

- KATIE: Yay!
- (UNCLE SHEP GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)
All right, come on, guys.

All right.

(BABBLING)

(GRUNTING, PANTING)

- Huh? What do you think?
- Max, so cool.

- Hey, where-where'd Max go?
- (LIAM LAUGHS)

And who let this
super cool cowboy in the car?

- (DUKE LAUGHS)
- Whoo-hoo!

(ALL LAUGH)

- Bye, Uncle Shep.
- (ENGINE STARTS)

Good-bye, now. So long.

(MAX AND DUKE BARKING)

Bye, Rooster!

And thank you!

(GRUNTING, SIGHING):
B-Bye.

(TURKEY GOBBLES)

Mind your business, turkey.

I'm-I'm...
I'm having a moment.

(TURKEY GOBBLES, WHIMPERS)

Okay, moment's over.

- (ROOSTER SIGHS)
- (GOBBLES)

♪ ♪

Mwah.

There we go, buddy.

- (MAX YAWNS)
- (DOOR CLOSES)

(DUKE SIGHS)

Good to be home.

So good. (SIGHS)

(CREAKING)

(SNIFFS)

(YELPS) Shush.

- Shh!
- You shh.

- (HU PURRS)
- SNOWBALL: Shush!

Huh? Snowball?

- (SNOWBALL GASPS)
- (HU GRUNTS)

Oh, hey, what, uh...

Hey, Tiny Dog.

What are you doing with a tiger
in my apartment?

Well, what are you doing home
from your trip so soon, hmm?

I mean, as long as
we pointing fingers.

Hey, hey, hey.
We don't have time for this.

We are trying to hide Hu before
the circus wolves get here.

Circus wolves?

You do know I have a life when
you're not around, right, TD?

- Yeah, okay, but...
- DAISY: Captain Snowball.

- They're here.
- What?

- (GASPS) Wolves.
- (MAX GASPS)

SNOWBALL: Oh, no, no, no,
no, no, no, no, no, no.

Oh, no, they gonna kill us, Hu.

Oh, this is bad.
(SOBS)

Well, at least we die together.

(SOBBING)

Keep it together, boy.

(SNIFFLES) Okay. Okay.

- We need a plan. Daisy?
- (MAX INHALES DEEPLY)

Let's hide Hu on the roof.

Tiny Dog, where are you going?

Yeah, I'm-I'm not sure,
but I guess I'm gonna...

gonna try and find
my inner Rooster.

What?

(PANTING):
Okay. Okay. Okay.

(MAX GRUNTS)

(WOLVES GROWLING)

(BARKING)

(GROWLING CONTINUES)

(WHIMPERS, GASPS)

(GRUNTS)

- (GASPS, WHIMPERS)
- (SERGEI GRUNTS)

(YELLS)

- (PANTING)
- (SERGEI LAUGHING)

SERGEI:
Puny little coward.

(GRUNTS)

(PANTING)

Hurry up, Hu.

All right, let's hide him
in the...

(SCREAMS)

Oh. Oh, it's just
this weird little guy.

Why don't you just go back
to wherever you belong, Bonzo,

because I don't want to... Ow!

- Ow, ow, ow, ow!
- (LITTLE SERGEI GIGGLES)

Ow, ow, ow! (SCREAMS)

(WOLVES GROWLING)

(GASPS)
Run, Hu. (GRUNTS)

(MOANS)

- (DAISY YELLING)
- (WOLVES SNARLING)

(GASPS)

(MOANING)

(WOLVES GROWLING)

- (DART GUN WHOOSHES)
- (GROWLS)

(MOANS)

(LAUGHS, GROANS)

(GROWLING)

Oh, pretty little dog,
I like you.

You will join my circus
as a cannonball.

(BARKING)

(GRUNTS, GASPS)

- (CLOWN WHIMPERS)
- Mongrel doesn't learn.

(PANTING)

- (HU WHIMPERS)
- Stupid tiger!

- (VEHICLE DOOR CLOSES)
- (GASPS)

(SERGEI LAUGHING)

(PAINED MOANING)

SERGEI:
Pathetic. Let's go!

- We have a train to catch.
- (MAX GASPS)

- Ow! (SIGHS)
- (ENGINE STARTS)

Daisy! Hu!

(EXHALES)
What...

They are in a truck.

What are we gonna do, TD?

Whoo-hoo!

Whoa! (LAUGHS)

(GASPS)

Attention.

This is Captain Snowball.

Me and Tiny Dog need backup.

We read you loud and clear.
Over.

We are headed to the circus.

This is urgent. Over.

Copy that.

- Busy Bee, Mommy's got to go save Daddy.
- (SQUEAKING)

Again.

- Cats, let's do this!
- (CATS MEOWING)

("LA GRANGE" BY ZZ TOP PLAYING)

♪ Rumor spreadin' round ♪

(MEOWING)

♪ In that Texas town ♪

♪ About that shack
outside La Grange ♪

Are my babies hungry?

♪ And you know
what I'm talkin' about ♪

Oh, dear.

(FEEDBACK SQUEALS)

♪ Have mercy ♪

♪ A-how, how, how, how ♪

♪ A-heh, a-how, how, how. ♪

♪ ♪

(ENGINE STARTS, REVS)

- (TIRES SQUEALING)
- (GRUNTS) Whoa!

Buckle up, everyone.

Hang on, Max.

We're coming.

- Floor it!
- (YOWLS)

(TIRES SQUEALING)

(YELLING EXCITEDLY)

(TIRES SQUEALING)

(HORNS HONKING)

(HU MOANS)

- Hurry up, you clowns!
- (CLOWN HORN HONKS)

(SERGEI LAUGHING)

- Let's go, let's go!
- (GROWLS)

Sergei have new toy.

Training is going to be
a lot more fun.

- (ELECTRICITY CRACKLES)
- (HU MOANS)

(SERGEI LAUGHS)

All right, let's get this show
on the tracks.

(ENGINE WHIRRING)

♪ ♪

(YELLING)

(LAUGHS)

(GRUNTS)

(SNOWBALL AND MAX GRUNT)

(MAX GASPS)

(PANTING AND GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

Snowball!

(PANTING)

Come on, jump!

(PANTS, YELLS)

- (SCREAMS)
- (MAX GRUNTING)

Guys, what's your location?

They're on a train
headed northbound.

- Over.
- Roger that, Norman.

We're on it.
Go right here.

- (YOWLING)
- (TIRES SQUEALING)

(WARNING BELL CLANGING)

You hang back, TD.

Captain Snowball
is on the ca... (YELPS)

Snowball!

I'm fine.

(TRAIN HORN BLOWS)

Yeah, can, uh... can you, uh,

find a way to get back
up here, or is there...?

- (WOLVES SNARLING)
- (GASPS, WHIMPERS)

- (WOLVES GRUNT)
- What the...?

(MAX YELLS)

- (WHIMPERS)
- (WOLVES SNARLING)

Tiny Dog.

(FOOTSTEPS SCURRYING ABOVE)

(LOUD GRUNT NEARBY)

What was that? Hello?

- (STRAINED GRUNTING)
- (GASPS) Daisy!

Snowball!

Oh, thank goodness.

Get me out of here.
I'm stuck.

Okay, okay, look... Huh?

(SNARLS)

(GRUNTS)

(SHRIEKS)

(YELLS, GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTING)

(GRUNTS FIERCELY, YELLS)

- (GRUNTING)
- (GROWLING)

(MARTIAL ARTS WHOOPING)

(HOOTING)

(BELL CLANGS)

- (YELLS)
- (SHRIEKS)

(MARTIAL ARTS GRUNTING)

(BOTH GRUNTING AND GROANING)

(MARTIAL ARTS WHOOPING)

(LITTLE SERGEI GROWLS, YELLS)

Body blow.

(GRUNTING RAPIDLY)

(WHOOPS)

(GROANS, WHIMPERS)

- (KNUCKLES CRACKING)
- This ends now, monkey.

(WHIMPERING)

- (SNOWBALL YELLS)
- (LAUGHS)

(WOLVES BARKING)

(YELPING, GRUNTING)

(WOLF SCREECHES)

(GRUNTING)

(GASPS)

(GROWLING)

(YELLING)

(MOANING)

(SIGHS)
You still there, monkey? Huh?

- (LITTLE SERGEI SCREECHING)
- Oh, no! He's here! He's here!

And on fire! (SCREAMS)

Hey! Get me out of here!

- (YELLS)
- (SNARLS)

(SCREAMING)

(SQUEALS)

(GASPS, BLOWS RAPIDLY)

Snowball, the fuse!

I got it. I got it.

(HOOTS)

(SHRIEKS)

(SCREAMS, GRUNTS)

(DAISY YELLS)

(GASPS)

(DAISY SCREAMS)

Whoa!

(GRUNTING)

(GROWLS)

- (YELLS, GROANS)
- (SHRIEKS)

(GRUNTING)

(SCREECHING)

- (HOOTS)
- (DAISY GRUNTS)

Say good-bye, monkey!

Uh-oh.

(SCREAMING)

(PANTING)

- (LITTLE SERGEI SCREAMING)
- Huh?

Oh! (SCREAMS)

(BOTH YELLING, GROANING)

(LITTLE SERGEI WHIMPERING)

(PANTING)

♪ ♪

(GRUNTS)

(GRUNTS)

(PANTING)

(TRAIN HORN BLARING)

(SNIFFS)

(GRUNTS)

- (BARKS)
- Huh?

(GROWLS)

All right, doggy.

Bring it.

(YELLS, SCREAMS)

Tiny Dog!

(SCREAMS)

(GRUNTING)

(SNOWBALL YELLING)

Get away! Get off me!

Go away! (YELLS)

My God!

- (YELLS)
- (SERGEI SCREAMS)

(BRAKES SCREECHING)

- (SPITS)
- SNOWBALL: Come on.

SERGEI:
Stop!

(ALL GASP)

You are going nowhere.

I've had enough.

(ALL WHIMPER)

This ends here and now.

(GRUNTS)

("ANTE UP" BY M.O.P.
PLAYING OVER CAR STEREO)

♪ Oh, oh, oh, oh,
oh, oh, oh... ♪

(BARKS) Hi, Max.

Gidget.

Uh, that was a bad guy, right?

- (LAUGHS) Yes.
- (LAUGHTER)

- Hey.
- (MEOWS, PURRS)

(CHUCKLES): Whoa.
Okay, all right, all right,

all right, all right,
all right, all right.

("IT'S GONNA BE A LOVELY DAY"
BY LUNCHMONEY LEWIS PLAYING)

(SERGEI GROANS)

- (GIGGLES)
- (ENGINE REVVING)

- (TIRES SQUEALING)
- (SERGEI YELLS, GROANS)

(MOANS)

(SCREAMS)

(COUGHING)

- (SNORING)
- Whoo-hoo! - Yeah!

- We did it!
- Whoo!

- Awesome! - Yay! (LAUGHS)
- This is so good!

♪ ♪

♪ I can feel the sun shining ♪

♪ I can see the stars
aligning... ♪

MAX: Okay, so things
got back to normal.

(MEOWS)

♪ I can feel my heart
beating... ♪

I mean, mostly.

(MUTTERING)

- (ROARS)
- (GASPS, SHRIEKS)

MAX:
You know what they say:

When life closes a door,

it opens a cat lady's window.

(MOANS, PURRS)

That's a good kitty.

Ooh! (GIGGLES)

- (THUD)
- (CAT YOWLS)

MAX:
Because everything changes.

Good morning, Snowball.

MAX: Nothing stays
the same for long.

Mm...

MAX: The minute
you're used to something,

the minute you think,
"Oh, this is how life is,"

- life finds a way of surprising you.
- Aw.

(YELLS)

Hey, man, what is going on?

What? This is...

awesome! Wow!

KATIE:
Come on, buddy.

- CHUCK: This is gonna be fun.
- Whoo-hoo!

MAX: You never know what life
is gonna throw at you.

(LIAM CHUCKLING)

And you have two choices:

run from it...

- (PIGEONS COOING)
- Boo!

- (LAUGHING)
- MAX: ...or run at it.

- ♪ The sun keep blinding me ♪
- ♪ Whoo ♪

♪ I don't know what
you've been told... ♪

- MAX: It's a big day.
- (INDISTINCT CHATTER)

And from this point on,
nothing is gonna be the same.

Wow.

- ♪ Just keep that smile upon your face ♪
- Hi.

MAX:
But I'm gonna be brave.

♪ 'Cause everything's
gonna be okay... ♪

And I'm gonna help Liam
be brave.

(LAUGHING)

Because he's my kid,

and I want him
to see the world.

The big, scary,
incredible world.

Okay, there's your cubby.
Right over there.

(SIGHS)
Are you okay?

Yeah.

I'm good.

♪ It's gonna be
a lovely day... ♪

(BOTH SOBBING)

(BLOWS NOSE)

♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely... ♪

Wait.

(LAUGHS)

My doggies.

MAX:
Always.

Bye-bye, Mama and Dada.

♪ Just keep that smile
upon your face ♪

♪ 'Cause everything's
gonna be okay ♪

♪ Just sing along with it ♪

♪ Oh, I know somebody love me ♪

♪ Someone be trying to hug me ♪

♪ Road is getting bumpy ♪

♪ Hey, but it's gonna be
a lovely day ♪

♪ Oh, yeah,
I know you feeling lonely ♪

♪ Someone be trying
to hold me ♪

♪ You can't be acting grumpy ♪

♪ It's gonna be a lovely day ♪

♪ Oh, I know somebody love me ♪

♪ Someone be trying to hug me ♪

♪ Road is getting bumpy ♪

♪ Hey, but it's gonna be
a lovely day ♪

♪ Oh, yeah,
I know you feeling lonely ♪

♪ Someone be trying
to hold me ♪

♪ You can't be acting grumpy ♪

♪ It's gonna be a lovely day ♪

♪ Hey, l-l-l-l-lovely ♪

♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪

♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪

♪ Oh, it's gonna be
a lovely day ♪

♪ Oh, l-l-l-l-lovely ♪

- ♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪
- ♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪

♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪

♪ L-L-L-L-Lovely ♪

♪ Ooh, it's gonna be
a lovely day. ♪

Bye, Snowball.
Bye, Mr. Bear.

("PANDA" PLAYING)

SNOWBALL:
♪ Panda ♪

♪ Panda, panda, panda, panda ♪

♪ Panda, listen, hey ♪

♪ Panda, panda, panda, panda ♪

♪ I got broads in Atlanta ♪

♪ Twisting rope,
drinking Fanta ♪

♪ Credit cards
and the scammers ♪

♪ Hittin' off licks
in the bando ♪

♪ Black X6, Phantom ♪

♪ Wait and see,
looking like a panda ♪

♪ Panda, panda, panda, panda ♪

♪ Listen ♪

♪ Hundred scammers,
Black X6, Phantom ♪

♪ Wait and see, Panda ♪

♪ Pockets swole, Danny ♪

♪ Selling bar, candy ♪

♪ Man, I'm the macho
like Randy... ♪

(MUSIC STOPS, DOOR CREAKS OPEN)

Snowball, I'm back.

(CHUCKLING)

Mm...

("PANDA" PLAYING)

♪ Panda, panda, panda,
panda, panda. ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

♪ ♪

ROOSTER:
Okay, moment's over.

♪ ♪

(MUSIC ENDS)