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1
00:00:01,368 --> 00:00:04,269
Finally, the mayor's
new year's Eve party tonight...
2
00:00:04,337 --> 00:00:06,238
Now, you're not
obligated to go,
3
00:00:06,306 --> 00:00:08,107
but attendance is mandatory.
4
00:00:08,174 --> 00:00:09,575
And what should we wear?
5
00:00:09,642 --> 00:00:12,077
It's a costume thing.
Come as baby new year.
6
00:00:12,145 --> 00:00:16,815
Stuart, we talked about this. That is the
kind of practical joke that hurts all of us.
7
00:00:16,883 --> 00:00:18,550
O.k., if there's
nothing else...
8
00:00:18,618 --> 00:00:23,155
Actually, does anybody know a
good place to get a cat killed?
9
00:00:23,223 --> 00:00:26,525
Upper East side, corner of 76th
and what is wrong with you?
10
00:00:26,593 --> 00:00:29,161
Our family cat is
like 1,000 years old.
11
00:00:29,229 --> 00:00:31,397
My mom wants me
to put it to sleep.
12
00:00:31,464 --> 00:00:33,632
Oh, Stuart, that's hard.
Tell me about it.
13
00:00:33,700 --> 00:00:36,035
The little guy's not falling
for any of my traps.
14
00:00:36,102 --> 00:00:38,904
I put his food in the dryer...
Nothing.
15
00:00:38,972 --> 00:00:41,006
Nikki, can I talk
to you for a sec?
16
00:00:41,074 --> 00:00:45,010
So I'll pick you up around 9:00?
I got a limousine stocked with champagne.
17
00:00:45,078 --> 00:00:47,279
Mike, I have a date tonight.
18
00:00:47,347 --> 00:00:48,814
We always go out
on new year's Eve.
19
00:00:48,882 --> 00:00:51,817
I turned down a date for you-
Beth from the gym.
20
00:00:51,885 --> 00:00:54,019
She would've slept with me.
21
00:00:54,087 --> 00:00:58,023
You said that she was vapid,
tacky and borderline psychotic.
22
00:00:58,091 --> 00:01:02,027
You're missing the point.
She would've slept with me.
23
00:01:02,095 --> 00:01:04,563
I'm sorry. As much as I love
being your safety date,
24
00:01:04,631 --> 00:01:06,398
I'm seeing someone
who's pretty special.
25
00:01:06,466 --> 00:01:08,133
Special like
"good for you" special,
26
00:01:08,201 --> 00:01:11,537
or special like "you have
to cut up his meat" special?
27
00:01:13,306 --> 00:01:17,509
Why is it so hard to believe that I am
dating a nice, caring, well-adjusted man?
28
00:01:17,577 --> 00:01:20,412
Oh, Nikki, the ventriloquist,
the guy who stole your stereo,
29
00:01:20,480 --> 00:01:24,049
the guy who wanted
his mom to move in with you?
30
00:01:24,117 --> 00:01:26,752
Remember Walter?
He took all your shoes.
31
00:01:28,188 --> 00:01:31,557
That was disturbing
on so many levels.
32
00:01:57,684 --> 00:02:00,219
So, everybody.
Great new year's Eve, huh?
33
00:02:00,286 --> 00:02:02,054
Oh, yeah. Swell.
34
00:02:02,122 --> 00:02:03,689
Magical.
35
00:02:08,361 --> 00:02:09,862
let's just...
36
00:02:09,929 --> 00:02:13,599
This is ridiculous, o. k.?
I'm sure embarrassing stuff happened,
37
00:02:13,667 --> 00:02:15,834
but why don't we sit down
and talk about it?
38
00:02:15,902 --> 00:02:18,070
O.k., I quit.
39
00:02:18,138 --> 00:02:20,406
Me too.
40
00:02:20,473 --> 00:02:22,675
I'll go with you guys.
We'll start our own city.
41
00:02:22,742 --> 00:02:26,712
Let's start with anyone who was sober
enough to remember anything that happened.
42
00:02:26,780 --> 00:02:29,915
Anyone-anyone at all.
43
00:02:31,518 --> 00:02:33,886
Maybe we should
call the caterers.
44
00:02:33,953 --> 00:02:36,021
There were caterers?
45
00:02:36,089 --> 00:02:38,190
Just forget new year's Eve
ever happened.
46
00:02:38,258 --> 00:02:40,392
We won't talk about it
for as long as we live.
47
00:02:40,460 --> 00:02:43,562
Mike, we need to talk
about new year's Eve.
48
00:02:43,630 --> 00:02:45,431
I love new year's Eve...
49
00:02:46,866 --> 00:02:48,967
- don't you?
- Yeah, sure, Paulie. Why not?
50
00:02:49,035 --> 00:02:50,402
It's a symbolic time,
51
00:02:50,470 --> 00:02:53,639
a sublime convergence
of past, present and future.
52
00:02:53,707 --> 00:02:55,140
Isn't that what you like?
53
00:02:55,208 --> 00:02:57,476
No, I just like doing this
in people's faces.
54
00:02:57,544 --> 00:03:00,045
Ow! Ow! Ow! Ow!
55
00:03:01,114 --> 00:03:03,449
Do you have a resolution, Mike?
56
00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:07,820
This year, I'm gonna try hard to stay the
same magnificent person I've always been.
57
00:03:07,887 --> 00:03:11,090
So your resolution is not to
change anything about yourself.
58
00:03:11,157 --> 00:03:13,158
And I think I can do it.
59
00:03:15,428 --> 00:03:18,030
I'd like to start
the evening off with a toast.
60
00:03:18,098 --> 00:03:20,432
Mike, Nikki, will you
fill everybody up, please?
61
00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:22,167
I'll be right back.
62
00:03:22,235 --> 00:03:24,636
- Watch him for me, will you?
- Mm-hmm.
63
00:03:25,505 --> 00:03:27,639
So, Jay...
Hmm?
64
00:03:27,707 --> 00:03:31,543
I understand you're a gynecologist.
Is that how you two met?
65
00:03:31,611 --> 00:03:33,479
I just want you all to know
66
00:03:33,546 --> 00:03:36,548
that I don't think of us
as mayor and staff.
67
00:03:37,650 --> 00:03:39,418
We're a family.
68
00:03:39,486 --> 00:03:43,155
Except for you. I've never
seen you before in my life.
69
00:03:44,257 --> 00:03:47,960
I love...
Every one of you...
70
00:03:49,262 --> 00:03:51,330
Again, except for you.
71
00:03:53,366 --> 00:03:55,834
Here's to the holidays.
Sir, open up your heart a bit.
72
00:03:55,902 --> 00:03:58,037
Oh, what the hell.
To all of us!
73
00:03:58,104 --> 00:03:59,304
Hear, hear.
74
00:03:59,372 --> 00:04:00,973
Say when.
75
00:04:01,041 --> 00:04:02,541
And... when!
76
00:04:02,609 --> 00:04:05,344
Thank you, sir.
77
00:04:05,412 --> 00:04:08,247
Have you seen Stuart?
You might wanna check the kitchen.
78
00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:11,150
He said something about sucking
all the rum out of the cake.
79
00:04:11,217 --> 00:04:14,820
Excuse me, everyone.
I have 2 announcements.
80
00:04:14,888 --> 00:04:18,023
My cat is dead,
the cake is good.
81
00:04:19,025 --> 00:04:20,592
Stuart, your cat died?
82
00:04:20,660 --> 00:04:22,761
Yeah. Why, you need a hat?
83
00:04:24,097 --> 00:04:25,964
Aren't you upset?
84
00:04:26,032 --> 00:04:28,901
Yeah. I have
a real empty feeling...
85
00:04:28,968 --> 00:04:30,903
In my glass!
86
00:04:30,970 --> 00:04:32,738
Ha-ha! We need more booze.
87
00:04:34,541 --> 00:04:36,342
I think new year's Eve
is so sexy.
88
00:04:36,409 --> 00:04:38,544
Oh, yeah, that's exactly
what I was thinking
89
00:04:38,611 --> 00:04:41,313
when I was driving over
in the limo... alone.
90
00:04:41,381 --> 00:04:44,083
Mike, you weren't alone.
You had the driver.
91
00:04:44,150 --> 00:04:48,120
He had a date. He kept making
out at all the red lights.
92
00:04:48,188 --> 00:04:50,789
Come on, just admit it.
New year's is hot.
93
00:04:50,857 --> 00:04:52,491
Yeah, I guess so.
Everybody's...
94
00:04:52,559 --> 00:04:54,259
All dressed up and everything.
95
00:04:54,327 --> 00:04:56,829
Corks popping...
Balls dropping.
96
00:04:56,896 --> 00:04:59,498
Of course, arbor day
would be sexy in that dress.
97
00:04:59,566 --> 00:05:02,267
You're looking pretty
snazzy in that tux.
98
00:05:02,335 --> 00:05:05,804
I'll have you know I'm also wearing
my very special... boxer shorts.
99
00:05:05,872 --> 00:05:09,108
I could tell by
the way you were walking.
100
00:05:09,175 --> 00:05:10,843
Are we flirting?
101
00:05:10,910 --> 00:05:13,645
I don't know.
What do you do when you flirt?
102
00:05:13,713 --> 00:05:16,215
I usually start out by
talking about my underwear.
103
00:05:16,282 --> 00:05:18,317
Ah, subtle approach.
Hey.
104
00:05:18,385 --> 00:05:20,386
I'm sorry. Am I
interrupting something?
105
00:05:20,453 --> 00:05:22,521
Oh, no.
We talk all day.
106
00:05:22,589 --> 00:05:27,159
Yeah, she says that, but you
know, she hangs on my every...
107
00:05:27,227 --> 00:05:29,661
I'll talk to you guys later.
108
00:05:31,097 --> 00:05:34,033
Stuart, when you said you were
going to get more champagne,
109
00:05:34,100 --> 00:05:37,002
we assumed you meant...
For everyone.
110
00:05:38,071 --> 00:05:41,173
You know... when I
brought that cat home,
111
00:05:41,241 --> 00:05:44,209
he fit in the palm of my hand.
112
00:05:44,277 --> 00:05:46,412
I named him piglet.
113
00:05:46,479 --> 00:05:49,048
Oh. You got that
from winnie the pooh?
114
00:05:49,115 --> 00:05:51,850
Nah, I got it from my dad's
nickname for my sister.
115
00:05:53,453 --> 00:05:56,989
Well, I'm sure that didn't give
her any self-esteem problems.
116
00:05:57,057 --> 00:05:59,558
She's totally
screwed-up now,
117
00:05:59,626 --> 00:06:01,593
but she's very thin.
118
00:06:01,661 --> 00:06:03,662
Stuart?
119
00:06:03,730 --> 00:06:05,898
You sitting down here alone,
120
00:06:05,965 --> 00:06:08,600
drinking,
thinking about your cat...
121
00:06:08,668 --> 00:06:11,236
If I didn't know you,
I'd say you had...
122
00:06:11,304 --> 00:06:13,205
Feelings.
123
00:06:13,273 --> 00:06:14,840
Well...
124
00:06:14,908 --> 00:06:16,475
I don't.
125
00:06:16,543 --> 00:06:20,079
You know, a man can cry...
And still be strong.
126
00:06:20,146 --> 00:06:23,182
Is that what they teach you
in gay college?
127
00:06:25,185 --> 00:06:26,852
Look, I'm sorry,
128
00:06:26,920 --> 00:06:29,121
but I have never cried
in my entire life,
129
00:06:29,189 --> 00:06:30,923
not even when I was a baby.
130
00:06:30,990 --> 00:06:34,326
Stuart, Stuart. It's o. k.
To show your emotions.
131
00:06:34,394 --> 00:06:35,928
No, it's a sign of weakness.
132
00:06:35,995 --> 00:06:38,731
For God's sake, will you for
once in your life be real?
133
00:06:38,798 --> 00:06:42,401
Let yourself feel something!
Just stop it, o. k.?
134
00:06:42,469 --> 00:06:44,803
Stuart...
135
00:06:44,871 --> 00:06:47,039
Piglet is dead.
136
00:06:48,942 --> 00:06:50,976
He was your best friend...
137
00:06:51,044 --> 00:06:53,045
And you loved him!
138
00:06:55,415 --> 00:06:57,583
But he is gone forever.
139
00:06:58,585 --> 00:07:01,453
It hurts so much!
Aw!
140
00:07:01,521 --> 00:07:04,890
I know, I know, I know, I know.
141
00:07:04,958 --> 00:07:07,993
oh, let it all out.
142
00:07:08,061 --> 00:07:11,597
Let it out. Yes, yes.
143
00:07:11,664 --> 00:07:15,100
Listen up, everybody.
I've had a wonderful idea.
144
00:07:15,168 --> 00:07:17,569
Wait, it's gone.
145
00:07:17,637 --> 00:07:19,872
Oh, no. There it is.
146
00:07:19,939 --> 00:07:23,342
Why don't we share
our resolutions?
147
00:07:23,410 --> 00:07:24,843
What if we don't have any?
148
00:07:24,911 --> 00:07:28,814
Then we'll just come up with
res-volutions for each other.
149
00:07:28,882 --> 00:07:32,618
So, basically we're gonna stand around
and point out each other's faults?
150
00:07:32,686 --> 00:07:36,055
I think it is a wonderful idea, sir.
Start with me, please.
151
00:07:36,122 --> 00:07:39,224
You're gonna have to give me a
minute to come up with something.
152
00:07:39,292 --> 00:07:41,493
You take your time, sir.
I know it's very difficult
153
00:07:41,561 --> 00:07:45,531
to find a chink
in the lassiter armor.
154
00:07:45,598 --> 00:07:48,267
Stace? What should mine be?
155
00:07:48,335 --> 00:07:49,935
James, I don't wanna do this.
156
00:07:50,003 --> 00:07:54,073
I promise, no matter what
you say, I will not get mad.
157
00:07:54,140 --> 00:07:56,975
O.k.
Maybe...
158
00:07:57,043 --> 00:08:01,447
You should try, you know, going
to the gym once in a while.
159
00:08:01,514 --> 00:08:03,949
You know, put on
a little muscle?
160
00:08:05,251 --> 00:08:07,419
That's great. Great.
Great.
161
00:08:07,487 --> 00:08:09,788
Great. Great, great.
162
00:08:11,424 --> 00:08:13,459
You're saying I'm a wimp?
163
00:08:13,526 --> 00:08:15,894
Come on, you said
you wouldn't get mad.
164
00:08:15,962 --> 00:08:17,329
Oh, I wouldn't worry about it.
165
00:08:17,397 --> 00:08:20,399
I doubt I'm strong enough
to carry a grudge.
166
00:08:20,467 --> 00:08:22,901
Oh, I've got one, Paul.
Lay it on me, sir.
167
00:08:22,969 --> 00:08:26,105
You're always
trying to please me.
168
00:08:26,172 --> 00:08:29,875
Be your own man! You don't
have to always... agree with me.
169
00:08:31,611 --> 00:08:34,613
It's brilliant, sir. You're
right. Thank you very much.
170
00:08:42,155 --> 00:08:44,590
I- I better
get back to work.
171
00:08:44,657 --> 00:08:46,892
So I'll just
make that check out
172
00:08:46,960 --> 00:08:48,961
to "all-service catering".
173
00:08:50,530 --> 00:08:51,864
I can explain.
Jay, please...
174
00:08:51,931 --> 00:08:53,932
If I may...
175
00:08:54,000 --> 00:08:56,969
Judging by your character,
I think you know how this goes.
176
00:08:57,037 --> 00:09:00,305
I tell you that Nikki
is a friend of mine.
177
00:09:00,373 --> 00:09:02,408
You give me some lame excuse,
178
00:09:02,475 --> 00:09:04,777
and then I kick your butt.
179
00:09:04,844 --> 00:09:07,780
Seeing as it's late and I would
like to get back to the party,
180
00:09:07,847 --> 00:09:11,684
why don't we just get straight
to the butt-kicking part?
181
00:09:17,023 --> 00:09:19,992
Then again, we are adults...
182
00:09:20,060 --> 00:09:23,328
And I believe we can
settle this with words.
183
00:09:23,396 --> 00:09:25,597
And this fireplace poker.
184
00:09:25,665 --> 00:09:27,232
Hey, come on, now.
Fair fight.
185
00:09:27,300 --> 00:09:29,768
Here you go.
Prepare to duel, o unfaithful one.
186
00:09:29,836 --> 00:09:32,338
Out, out, before I smite thee!
187
00:09:33,807 --> 00:09:36,475
Mike!
What are you doing?
188
00:09:36,543 --> 00:09:39,345
That lamp attacked me.
189
00:09:39,412 --> 00:09:42,981
Be careful. I think
that one's making a move.
190
00:09:43,049 --> 00:09:44,550
Hey.
I wanted to tell you
191
00:09:44,617 --> 00:09:46,885
that I know I'm supposed
to be your safety date,
192
00:09:46,953 --> 00:09:49,955
and it would kill me if
I had to be here alone tonight.
193
00:09:50,023 --> 00:09:51,757
And so, I wanted
to give you a hug.
194
00:09:51,825 --> 00:09:55,527
Yeah, uh, Nikki- I also wanted to
ask you, do you know where Jay is?
195
00:09:55,595 --> 00:09:58,163
A hug first.
196
00:10:05,872 --> 00:10:07,639
The catering girl?
197
00:10:07,707 --> 00:10:09,808
Was she cute?
198
00:10:09,876 --> 00:10:12,945
I don't know. I didn't get
a good look at her face.
199
00:10:13,013 --> 00:10:16,181
Jay had most of it
in his mouth.
200
00:10:16,249 --> 00:10:18,484
O.k.,
that's probably not helping.
201
00:10:20,420 --> 00:10:22,721
Stuart, why don't you
come and join us.
202
00:10:22,789 --> 00:10:25,591
You've been staring at
that painting for an hour.
203
00:10:29,896 --> 00:10:32,131
I think I'm o. k. Now.
204
00:10:32,198 --> 00:10:33,699
Pass the scotch, please.
205
00:10:33,767 --> 00:10:36,101
piglet loved scotch.
206
00:10:43,243 --> 00:10:45,444
what do you want?
You want water?
207
00:10:45,512 --> 00:10:46,845
Huh, you want water?
208
00:10:46,913 --> 00:10:49,748
Get it yourself.
You got hands.
209
00:10:52,385 --> 00:10:54,319
Who's trying to please you now?
210
00:10:54,387 --> 00:10:56,722
He was choking, Paul.
211
00:11:04,097 --> 00:11:06,565
Just grab the champagne
and let's go.
212
00:11:06,633 --> 00:11:08,901
Gee, I hope I can
muster enough strength
213
00:11:08,968 --> 00:11:10,869
to get back up the stairs.
214
00:11:10,937 --> 00:11:13,806
James, look. I'm sorry
I said anything! O.k.?
215
00:11:13,873 --> 00:11:16,008
You're the strongest
man in the world!
216
00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:18,577
Your biceps are huge.
You're making me woozy!
217
00:11:20,613 --> 00:11:24,717
Right here, huh? You and me.
Let's settle this like men.
218
00:11:24,784 --> 00:11:26,685
James, you're drunk.
219
00:11:26,753 --> 00:11:28,821
I've only had
2 glasses of champagne.
220
00:11:28,888 --> 00:11:30,889
Yeah, I know.
221
00:11:32,826 --> 00:11:35,160
I made a mistake saying
what I said, o. k.?
222
00:11:35,228 --> 00:11:37,863
And you made a mistake
overreacting.
223
00:11:37,931 --> 00:11:40,532
So, please, for the sake
of our friendship,
224
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,935
just end it. O.k.?
225
00:11:45,672 --> 00:11:47,373
I think I can take you.
226
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,308
Oh, don't tempt me!
227
00:11:49,376 --> 00:11:51,577
What's the matter, huh?
You're chicken?
228
00:11:51,644 --> 00:11:53,645
First one's free, junior.
229
00:11:53,713 --> 00:11:56,181
What's the second one gonna cost me?
I don't know.
230
00:11:56,249 --> 00:11:58,050
Aah!
231
00:11:58,118 --> 00:12:00,586
Is that all you got?
You're like my grandmother.
232
00:12:00,653 --> 00:12:03,655
Not your grandmother,
James. What's my name?
233
00:12:03,723 --> 00:12:06,458
Uncle? Your name's uncle!
Uncle. Yeah. Right.
234
00:12:06,526 --> 00:12:08,360
That's right.
235
00:12:10,730 --> 00:12:12,998
That's only a warning.
236
00:12:13,066 --> 00:12:14,500
I'm going home.
237
00:12:14,567 --> 00:12:16,268
You should stay here
with friends.
238
00:12:16,336 --> 00:12:20,105
Don't worry. I have a very good
system for dealing with this.
239
00:12:20,173 --> 00:12:22,274
It's very healthy.
240
00:12:22,342 --> 00:12:24,743
I'm gonna need these.
241
00:12:24,811 --> 00:12:27,112
Just-just let me
sneak out of here. Shh!
242
00:12:27,180 --> 00:12:30,082
Uh-uh... all right.
You do what you have to do.
243
00:12:31,384 --> 00:12:33,485
Hey, everybody,
Nikki's going home.
244
00:12:34,854 --> 00:12:37,856
No, no, no! Nikki, sit down!
It's new year's.
245
00:12:37,924 --> 00:12:40,025
Besides, what about your date?
246
00:12:40,093 --> 00:12:41,427
He left.
247
00:12:41,494 --> 00:12:42,961
Good riddance.
248
00:12:43,029 --> 00:12:44,897
Loser.
249
00:12:44,964 --> 00:12:46,899
I never liked him.
250
00:12:46,966 --> 00:12:49,802
Actually, I was gonna call
and see if we might work it out.
251
00:12:49,869 --> 00:12:51,437
Love that guy.
Handsome.
252
00:12:51,504 --> 00:12:53,238
He's a keeper.
253
00:12:54,441 --> 00:12:56,141
So, why'd he leave?
254
00:12:56,209 --> 00:12:59,044
Mike chased him out
with a hot poker.
255
00:12:59,112 --> 00:13:01,747
Mike shouldn't have done that.
256
00:13:01,815 --> 00:13:04,516
You know what? You're right.
Mike shouldn't have done that.
257
00:13:04,584 --> 00:13:07,319
Whoa. You have no reason
to get angry at me.
258
00:13:07,387 --> 00:13:10,556
I am not the one who hooked up with
the catering girl in the library.
259
00:13:10,623 --> 00:13:11,857
Oh!
260
00:13:11,925 --> 00:13:13,726
Well.
261
00:13:21,835 --> 00:13:23,769
oh, you love this, don't you?
262
00:13:23,837 --> 00:13:26,905
Well, it's no weekend
on fire Island, but, uh-
263
00:13:26,973 --> 00:13:28,741
it's not bad.
264
00:13:30,010 --> 00:13:33,645
Ah, this is great for me.
I'm a human fountain!
265
00:13:33,713 --> 00:13:35,748
This will help me tomorrow
266
00:13:35,815 --> 00:13:39,151
when I'm negotiating
with the teamsters.
267
00:13:39,219 --> 00:13:41,954
Oh, Stuart, I feel like
this is all my fault.
268
00:13:42,022 --> 00:13:46,225
Oh, why? Because you tortured me and broke
me down until you turned me into a sissy?
269
00:13:47,827 --> 00:13:50,796
Give me tissue.
All right, all right.
270
00:13:52,132 --> 00:13:54,566
Stuart, I'm gonna
help you get over this.
271
00:13:54,634 --> 00:13:57,636
Just think...
Of happy things.
272
00:13:57,704 --> 00:14:00,439
Bunny rabbits,
puppies, kittens.
273
00:14:00,507 --> 00:14:02,508
kittens?
274
00:14:02,575 --> 00:14:04,109
Forget kittens.
Forget kittens.
275
00:14:04,177 --> 00:14:06,378
You suck at this.
276
00:14:06,446 --> 00:14:08,447
ah, I know.
Just-just think of...
277
00:14:08,515 --> 00:14:11,884
Of bad things happening
to other people... to me!
278
00:14:11,951 --> 00:14:13,585
to Paul.
279
00:14:18,024 --> 00:14:19,958
it stopped.
Mmm?
280
00:14:20,026 --> 00:14:22,661
Oh, tears of Joy!
281
00:14:29,836 --> 00:14:31,470
Hey.
282
00:14:31,538 --> 00:14:33,739
I fired the catering girl.
283
00:14:35,875 --> 00:14:37,910
Cannoli?
284
00:14:39,446 --> 00:14:42,648
what is wrong with me?
285
00:14:42,716 --> 00:14:45,551
Will you please help me
figure out why I insist
286
00:14:45,618 --> 00:14:48,320
on being attracted
to freaks and losers?
287
00:14:48,388 --> 00:14:50,155
Ahh...
288
00:14:50,223 --> 00:14:51,824
It's not gonna
happen this year.
289
00:14:51,891 --> 00:14:54,193
You know,
when I was a little girl,
290
00:14:54,260 --> 00:14:57,429
my dad used to tell me
I was gonna be a heartbreaker.
291
00:14:57,497 --> 00:15:00,265
You are an amazing woman.
292
00:15:00,333 --> 00:15:02,568
You're smart, you're funny...
293
00:15:02,635 --> 00:15:05,270
And I'm sure I'm not the first
person to tell you this,
294
00:15:05,338 --> 00:15:06,939
you're drop-dead gorgeous.
295
00:15:07,007 --> 00:15:11,010
And I'm sure your dream guy
is out there somewhere.
296
00:15:11,077 --> 00:15:13,512
Right now.
297
00:15:13,580 --> 00:15:16,882
Probably robbing
a convenience store.
298
00:15:16,950 --> 00:15:19,451
Watch it.
I'm still mad at you.
299
00:15:19,519 --> 00:15:24,790
I can't help myself. I can't
stand by and watch you get hurt.
300
00:15:24,858 --> 00:15:27,493
And I think you know that.
301
00:15:27,560 --> 00:15:30,929
And I think...
You forgive me for it.
302
00:15:51,484 --> 00:15:53,352
Bull's-eye!
303
00:15:53,420 --> 00:15:56,188
You know, you simply must...
304
00:15:56,256 --> 00:15:57,623
Try...
305
00:15:57,691 --> 00:16:01,527
The mousse!
306
00:16:01,594 --> 00:16:03,862
ah!
307
00:16:03,930 --> 00:16:07,032
Oh! I spent 70 bucks
on this do, Buster.
308
00:16:07,100 --> 00:16:11,003
You are so... dead.
309
00:16:18,478 --> 00:16:20,813
all right. All right.
310
00:16:33,793 --> 00:16:35,928
mmm.
311
00:16:35,995 --> 00:16:39,398
that mousse
does taste pretty good!
312
00:16:49,709 --> 00:16:51,744
oh, I'm sorry.
I'm sorry.
313
00:16:51,811 --> 00:16:55,748
I don't know what-what the
hell I just did. I mean it.
314
00:17:00,153 --> 00:17:03,122
I'm tipsy
and-and you're vulnerable.
315
00:17:07,160 --> 00:17:08,727
oh, God!
316
00:17:08,795 --> 00:17:11,196
Oh, God.
317
00:17:14,300 --> 00:17:16,568
oh, Nikki.
Oh, Mike!
318
00:17:16,636 --> 00:17:18,604
I know, I know!
Nikki!
319
00:17:18,672 --> 00:17:20,272
Mike.
320
00:17:20,340 --> 00:17:22,307
tongs.
321
00:17:25,512 --> 00:17:27,846
Ouch.
322
00:17:30,583 --> 00:17:33,452
My favorite part of new year's,
watching the ball droop.
323
00:17:33,520 --> 00:17:35,921
Paul!
Turn on the tv.
324
00:17:35,989 --> 00:17:38,157
Do it yourself!
325
00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:41,927
- Sir.
- It's almost midnight.
326
00:17:41,995 --> 00:17:44,430
Time for one of my family's
favorite traditions.
327
00:17:44,497 --> 00:17:47,666
Everybody... throw your
glasses into the fireplace.
328
00:17:53,206 --> 00:17:55,040
To tradition.
329
00:17:57,544 --> 00:18:00,446
3! 2! 1!...
330
00:18:00,513 --> 00:18:03,449
Happy new year!
331
00:18:06,920 --> 00:18:09,288
you don't think they'd
come in here, do you?
332
00:18:09,356 --> 00:18:12,524
I don't think so.
Do you?
333
00:18:16,596 --> 00:18:19,231
I take it that's a "yes".
334
00:18:22,669 --> 00:18:24,236
what-
335
00:18:26,473 --> 00:18:28,640
you guys oughta
try the desserts.
336
00:18:30,410 --> 00:18:32,845
They knock you off your feet.
337
00:18:38,385 --> 00:18:41,787
Can I see you in my office
for just a minute?
338
00:18:41,855 --> 00:18:43,522
Carter?
Yeah.
339
00:18:43,590 --> 00:18:46,458
Uh... what happened
new year's Eve...
340
00:18:46,526 --> 00:18:48,961
I know you're not
the type of guy that would...
341
00:18:49,029 --> 00:18:51,964
Ever use that against me.
Oh, you're right.
342
00:18:52,032 --> 00:18:54,933
And it just makes me
wanna cry and cry.
343
00:18:55,001 --> 00:18:56,935
All right. How long
is this gonna go on?
344
00:18:57,003 --> 00:19:00,272
Mmm, until you learn to become a
sensitive and caring human being.
345
00:19:00,340 --> 00:19:02,875
Well, thanks to you...
346
00:19:02,942 --> 00:19:05,544
I'm halfway there
already, Buddy.
347
00:19:09,182 --> 00:19:11,583
We uh...
We need to talk.
348
00:19:11,651 --> 00:19:15,320
If those people hadn't come in
when they did last night...
349
00:19:15,388 --> 00:19:18,290
But they did.
And we didn't.
350
00:19:18,358 --> 00:19:21,627
Right. So it's just a...
Tiny mistake.
351
00:19:21,695 --> 00:19:23,962
No big deal.
352
00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:28,000
It's amazing what 30 or 40 glasses
of champagne will do to someone.
353
00:19:29,602 --> 00:19:31,637
and today's today,
and last night was...
354
00:19:31,705 --> 00:19:35,074
Last night?
That-that was last year.
355
00:19:35,141 --> 00:19:37,076
Ancient history.
356
00:19:37,143 --> 00:19:38,677
Absolutely.
357
00:19:38,745 --> 00:19:40,512
So, why aren't you leaving?
358
00:19:40,580 --> 00:19:43,916
Why aren't you leaving?
It's my office.
359
00:19:43,983 --> 00:19:47,720
And I was wondering if...
One of us was gonna say...
360
00:19:47,787 --> 00:19:49,288
"But".
361
00:19:49,356 --> 00:19:53,092
You mean like... "But what if
we're perfect for each other?"
362
00:19:53,159 --> 00:19:55,761
I was thinking "but what
if the sex was so good
363
00:19:55,829 --> 00:19:58,764
we were paid to travel
and demonstrate it to others?"
364
00:20:00,500 --> 00:20:03,168
But yours works.
365
00:20:04,437 --> 00:20:07,439
Come here for a second.
Should I lock the door?
366
00:20:07,507 --> 00:20:10,843
My therapist says that if you
get really close to each other
367
00:20:10,910 --> 00:20:16,148
and you don't feel chemistry, then you don't
have enough to build a relationship on.
368
00:20:16,216 --> 00:20:18,650
At least that way,
we won't have to wonder.
369
00:20:18,718 --> 00:20:20,719
All right.
We could do that.
370
00:20:24,924 --> 00:20:26,592
A little closer.
371
00:20:34,067 --> 00:20:36,802
Whew.
This is really close.
372
00:20:36,870 --> 00:20:38,704
No talking.
373
00:20:47,247 --> 00:20:49,081
You o. k.?
374
00:20:50,517 --> 00:20:53,018
Yeah... are you?
375
00:20:54,854 --> 00:20:57,456
Yeah. Yeah.
376
00:20:57,524 --> 00:21:00,092
Oh, well. Ha-ha.
377
00:21:01,895 --> 00:21:03,796
Well, it was worth a shot.
378
00:21:03,863 --> 00:21:05,864
huh!
379
00:21:07,033 --> 00:21:08,867
See you later.
380
00:21:11,271 --> 00:21:13,706
Oop!
381
00:21:13,773 --> 00:21:15,507
Ah!
382
00:21:20,680 --> 00:21:23,515
what is that noise?
383
00:21:23,583 --> 00:21:26,251
Oh, that noise? Yeah,
just some guy in my office.
384
00:21:26,319 --> 00:21:27,953
Aahhh!
385
00:21:28,021 --> 00:21:31,423
- All right. I'll have to check and
see if I'm free. - o. K.
386
00:21:31,491 --> 00:21:34,727
Aahhh!
Aahhh!
387
00:21:34,794 --> 00:21:37,129
- Yeah, yeah. I'm free.
- grEat.
388
00:21:37,197 --> 00:21:39,331
O.k. Bye-bye.
389
00:21:41,134 --> 00:21:43,736
Aahhh!
390
00:21:43,803 --> 00:21:47,439
James, I really
have stuff to do.
391
00:21:47,507 --> 00:21:50,676
Can we just call it
a draw? O.k.?
392
00:21:52,345 --> 00:21:54,279
All right.
393
00:21:56,049 --> 00:21:57,583
I win.
394
00:21:57,650 --> 00:21:59,151
Sit, ubu, sit.
Good dog.
395
00:22:01,721 --> 00:22:03,055
moo.
9999
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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