Original subtitles

RICHIE: Welcome back to the Greenpatch Cricket Ground.

TONY: Yes, Rich. A few dark clouds around earlier on.

But thankfully, they've passed.

RICHIE: Well, what a thrilling test this is turning out to be, Tony!

Eight hours of play and not a single run scored!

You could cut the tension with your beak!

If this was any more absorbing, Rich, it'd be a tea-towel!

RICHIE: Yes, he's giving him the eye,

and he's giving him the finger too!

Well, this could be trouble. He's going back for the long run-up.

Yes, well, aren't these players

looking delicious out there this afternoon, Rich?

Yes, they certainly are, Tony!

I'd lick my lips if I had any.

TONY: Tommo steaming in hard and fast now from the Billabong end.

Well, that's a marvelous shot indeed!

Yes he's got under that one and really given it some stick!

That's a knockout! (GRUNTS)

That's just not cricket.

BLINKY: Hyah! Got Him! Ha-ha! Howzat!

BLINKY: That deadset legend is my dad, Bill Koala!

Yeah, maybe you've heard of him.

He's, paws-down, the best explorer in the whole outback.

But of all the places he's ever been, he reckons our home,

Greenpatch, is the best. Hi, fellas! Nice!

In Greenpatch, everyone's welcome.

Hi, Bill!

BLINKY: Furry. Feathered. Two legs. Four legs.

Even fun-spoiling, snot-sucking goannas like old Crankypants.

(CHUCKLES) But dad keeps him in check.

(LAUGHTER)

(BLOWS RASPBERRY)

My dad's always going out into the Great Desert

to rescue lost and injured animals.

He's a real hero.

Here you go, Bill. Cheers, love.

Kind of a bit like me!

Son! Getcha fluffy little butt down here!

I'm heading off. BLINKY: Coming! Wha... Ouch!

Oh! Just a sec!

(SCREAMING) Here I am!

(CHUCKLES) Ready when you are, Dad.

Where are we going? Erm, right.

Your boof-head father's got it in his head

that the Sea of White Dragons really exists.

The Sea of White Dragons?

Whoa, Dad, can I come with you?

I... (CHUCKLES) Steady on, champ.

I've got this trip covered.

The desert's not Greenpatch, mate.

It's a wild, rugged land full of mystery and danger.

It's no place for a little koala.

When you're bigger, aye?

But I am big! And strong. Look.

(EFFORT GRUNTING)

And I hardly ever fall over anymore.

Except just then. Stupid grass!

This is called the Koala Flyer.

I made it to help us explore. Whoa! It's like you say,

"The higher you go, the further you see."

(CHUCKLES) It's great, mate.

But, you know, koalas can't fly.

We can work on your kite while your dad's away.

(SIGHS) BILL: Cheer up, cheeky chops.

What do us adventurers always say?

Don't drink the yellow water?

(WHISPERS) Yeah, the other thing.

An adventurer never gives up.

An adventurer always helps those in need.

And?

Always...

BOTH: Keeps his promise!

Too right!

I promise that one day I'll take you on an adventure.

If you promise to look after your mum while I'm gone.

And you promise not to get yourself eaten.

I'll be right, Betty.

(LAUGHS) You know me. Yes.

I do know you. (CHUCKLES)

(SPITS) Paws in!

(SPITS) Paws in!

See ya, mate

I'll be back in two shakes of a bilby's whisker.

(CHUCKLES)

BLINKY: But he wasn't.

It's been a year since he left.

(CHUCKLES SOFTLY)

I wish he'd hurry up.

Without dad around, Cranky's gone troppo.

Thinks he owns the place.

Did I say "stop"?

(SCREAMS IN PAIN)

BLINKY: When my dad gets back, he's gonna kick his scaly butt.

But right now, he's out exploring,

the Sea of White Dragons. (ALL GASP)

Probably surrounded by a million hungry tooth monsters.

Takin' em down to Koala Town one by one.

(SQUEALS) Here comes the big one!

(YELLING)

Robert, stop doing that! What?

Kangaroos hop, lyre birds mimic! Deal with it.

Birds! Splodge, fruit bombs.

(SQUEAKS)

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

Er, thanks.

Operation Goanna Splat is, go!

Hey, kids. I'm heading out.

(ALL GASP)

Did I hear something about goannas?

Er, yeah. (STUTTERS)

I was saying we should go-anna get some lunch.

Blinky, let me worry about Cranklepot.

Please. Be good.

'Course, Mum. I'm always good. Huh?

Blinky... I promise.

Come on. Cranky's speech is about to start.

Yeah... Whoa! Didn't you just promise to be good?

Good? (LAUGHS) I'm gonna be great!

(LAUGHING) Comin' through!

BLINKY: Robert! Code red!

ROBERT: On it, Blinky!

(SIREN WAILING)

Marcia! Wind check!

She's slow and steady, Blinky.

Perfect day to fly a kite.

BLINKY: And rain on Cranky's parade!

(BLINKY LAUGHS)

MARCIA: And you really are sure about this, Blinky?

SPLODGE: Yep, It says "No climbing!"

Dad says an adventurer makes his own rules.

But, what if your kite crashes?

Yeah. Like all the others.

Yeah! It's gonna go... (IMITATES CRASHING)

Your brains will...

(IMITATES SPLATTERING)

And then your mum will start...

(CRYING)

Yeah, thanks, Robert!

Trust me, there's nothing to worry about.

I'll show them, this kite will fly.

(CHIRPING) Ooh.

Just like you one day.

(SQUEAKS) (EXCLAIMS)

(GIGGLES)

(INDISTINCT CHATTERING)

My fellow Greenpatchians!

Have no fear, Cranklepot's here!

(CLEARS THROAT)

Where was I? Oh, yes.

We're all gathered here to honor me, your most beloved lizard.

(GRUNTING)

Whoa!

CRANKY: Just a humble reptile.

I hope you like fruit, Crankypants!

(LAUGHS) In your face!

Whoa! Change of plan!

Sure thing, Blinky!

What's the new pla... (SCREAMS)

Today marks one year since the so-called founder of Greenpatch,

the traitorous Bill Koala abandoned us

like a cowardly little vegetarian!

Pull your snout in, Wilberforce Cranklepot!

My husband didn't abandon anyone.

He went out into the Great Desert to save lost animals!

Oh, really? And where is he now?

I'll tell you where he is, he's dead.

(ALL EXCLAIM) He's an ex-koala.

(SPUTTERS)

Beware, I say!

The saber-toothed dingo-dogs and flying fang serpents are coming!

What? (SCOFFS) Don't listen to him! He's making it up!

Closing our borders to the foreign menace is our only hope!

Don't you dare! Greenpatch is a refuge for all animals!

Pah! Bleeding-hearted jibber-jabber!

I'll give you jibber-jabber, you walking handbag!

It's a cold-blooded world out there, Mrs. Bill.

And it's time we all embraced our inner reptile.

Which is why I, your new leader, King Wilberforce Cranklepot,

henceforth rename Greenpatch, Goannasburg.

What? Behold the Statue of Lizardy!

(ALL GASP)

(CRYING)

Crikey!

Striking, isn't he? I carved him myself...

(YELPS) (BLINKY LAUGHS)

Take that, termite breath!

Whoa! (SIREN WAILS)

Whoo-hoo! Incoming! This is not a drill!

(IMITATES DRILLING SOUND) That's a drill!

(WHOOPING) I'm flying!

Whoa! I'm falling!

(SCREAMING)

(GRUNTS) (GASPS)

Blinky!

BOTH: Marcia! What?

(GASPS) Marcia!

(ALL GASP)

What have you done, Koala? My statue!

(COUGHING)

Marcia, are you okay? No!

You know I can't stand paddy melon juice.

(BOTH LAUGH)

(GROANS) Blinky Bill!

This was my favorite shirt! Typical Blinky.

See? This is what happens when someone breaks my rules.

Everyone suffers.

(INDISTINCT MURMURING)

Time to teach you a lesson, tree-rat.

(GIGGLES)

Have to catch me first!

You malignant marsupial!

(RETCHING)

The border swamp is out of bounds!

My dad says adventure has no bounds!

Stop, fluff ball! (GRUNTS)

Insolent!

(LAUGHING)

CRANKY: I'm warning you!

Leaving Greenpatch is forbidden!

Forbid this! (FARTS)

(LAUGHING)

In your snout, Cranky!

I am the king of Goannasburg!

There's no such place as Goannasburg.

My dad discovered this valley and he named it Greenpatch!

But your dad's not here anymore, is he?

(LAUGHS) What's so funny?

The look on your face, in about three seconds.

Three, two, one. Uh-oh. Huh?

(BOTH SCREAMING)

(CHUCKLES)

(INDISTINCT LAUGHTER)

Whoa!

(GASPS)

Oh!

You're a keeper.

Dad?

So this is where you went.

Gotcha! Let me go!

It's a disgrace! As your king, I demand punishment forthwith!

Cranky, you are not the king.

You're just a jumped-up skink...

Yeah, with termite breath. Ouch!

Tell it to the claw, Koalas. The whole town's behind me now,

thanks to your little stunt.

First thing tomorrow, I'm sealing up Goannasburg from the outside world.

And then... (CACKLES)

I'm turning this tree into my castle.

You just try it, you stupid ant-licker!

(GROANS) (SCOFFS)

Blinky! Where are your manners?

Shut your snout, you stinking,

scaly, stupid little ant-licker!

Start packing, Koalas!

I'll be back and you better be out!

(SIGHS) Blinky Bartholomew Bill!

You promised me you'd be good. Marcia was nearly squished.

I know. She shouldn't have been standing there.

But now's not the time for finger-pointing,

we've gotta go save Dad before Cranky shuts up the valley forever.

Blinky! Greenpatch needs us here.

If we don't stand up to Cranky, who will?

Dad will! I know which way he went,

I saw his marker! Mum, come on.

Mum? It's been a year, love.

Exactly!

We have to go to the Sea of White Dragons and save him!

There's no such place, Blinky.

There's nothing out there but desert.

It's just a myth! But...

What if it's not? I can't lose you too, Blinky.

I'm sorry.

But I forbid you to go. That's not fair.

You might have given up on Dad, but I haven't.

And Dad says you never give up!

Blinky!

Never give up!

(SLAMS DOOR)

(SIGHS)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

MRS. BILL: Blinky? Blinky's not here!

Well, can you give him a message that his mum loves him?

I'll think about it.

(SIGHS)

Dad.

I'm not giving up.

If the Sea of White Dragons really exists,

I'll find you.

Blinky, this is crazy! You don't even know what's out there!

It's dangerous! Remember what Cranky said?

That old fossil! He's just trying to scare us.

And it worked! What if the flying fanged serpents get you?

Or the toothy beasts with their slobbery teeth?

It's madness, Blinky!

Come on, this is where Dad went.

SPLODGE: Whoa.

MARCIA: This is amazing!

But Blinky, what if...

It's okay, Splodge.

As long as we stick to the plan, everything's gonna be fine.

The plan? What plan?

The plan where you cover for me, "Blinky".

"Blinky"? I'm Robe... Oh.

(BLINKY'S VOICE) I remember now.

I sure hope this works. It'll work, trust me.

Mum won't even know I'm gone.

(SPITS) Paws in.

(ALL SPIT)

Operation White Dragons is, go.

But you're just a little... Trust me, I'll be fine.

Ooh! Didn't hurt!

(LAUGHS SHEEPISHLY)

See ya later, bush potatoes! In a while, marsupial.

See ya, Blinky. Please come back.

(CHUCKLES) I bet ya 100 yams he's back before lunch.

BLINKY: Guys! I can still hear you!

Sorry, Blinky.

Keep going, mate.

Double or nothing.

Ha! Walk in the park, guys!

Whoa! Missed that one! Oh, yeah.

(SCREAMING)

(STUTTERING) Get it off!

Are you okay, Blinky?

Huh? Oh, yeah! Ha-ha!

I...

Think.

(NERVOUSLY) Just walking.

It's not creepy.

Not creepy at all.

(HUMMING) Not creepy.

��Hey, hey, Blinky Bill, you'll never catch me standing still �

Whoa. Yes.

Wow!

(SPLAT)

Ugh. What animal did you come out of?

Huh! Water!

(HORN HONKS) (GASPS)

(VEHICLE PASSES)

The adventure begins.

(GRUNTING)

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

(GASPS)

Oh.

What happened to you?

(HORN HONKING) (GASPS)

(SIGHING)

(GRUMBLING) (GASPS)

Oh.

(GIGGLES)

You stupid... Ow!

(RADIO PLAYING)

(BELL CHIMES) (GASPS)

WOMAN: Hans! Beautiful day.

HANS: Sure is. Let me give you a hand with that, love.

WOMAN: How have you been keeping? Ah, can't complain.

On my own again today, though. Gert called in sick again.

All that boy does is party all night.

(GASPS)

Wow.

(PANTING)

(GASPS)

(EVIL LAUGH)

You know, mother always said it was rude for me to play with my food.

But I despise my mother.

There's only one thing I despise more than her.

Can you guess what that is?

Uh-uh.

(SNIFFS) (BLINKY LAUGHS)

Koala.

Oh! Good day, little fella! (LAUGHS) Yah!

(CHUCKLES)

(GROWLING)

(WHOOPING)

(YELLS)

(GROWLS)

Hot, hot, hot, hot!

(SPITTING)

(COUGHS)

(YELLING)

Water!

Water, water, water, water!

I need water!

Water, water, water, water!

(GROWLS)

Koala!

Huh?

Are you all right? Let me help you up.

(YELLING)

(NERVOUS LAUGHTER)

You're up!

Finally! I shall have my revenge!

But, but I don't even know you.

Really? My sincerest apologies.

Sir Claude. Purebred British Shorthair.

(CHUCKLES)

Eater of small animals.

Tormentor of birds. And your worst nightmare, Koala.

(SNARLS)

(YELPS)

(LAUGHS) Lunch is served! Yum!

(GRUNTS)

(SCREAMING)

(ELECTRICITY CRACKLING)

(GROANS)

HAN: (SCREAMS) What's going on here?

(FIREWORKS EXPLODING)

You!

(GRUNTS)

I will destroy you, Koala.

If it's the last thing I do.

Whoa! First time? In a truck?

(GRUNTS) (LAUGHS)

I guess so.

Whoa! What?

What're you looking at?

Okay, that's a little too close.

Personal space! Act cool. Don't make eye contact.

You're a girl. Er, last time I looked.

In a cage. You just say what you see, huh?

How did you get in there? How'd you get out there?

(SNIFFING)

Wait a second.

That sweaty unwashed smell... You're wild!

Are you a stowaway? Whoa. That's so cool.

You had enough of the great outdoors, huh?

I know this is all new and strange,

just sit tight and the humans will take care of us.

Whoa! There's no need to freak out.

Oh, I'm not freaking out. You kind of look like you're freaking out.

Well, I'm not freaking out.

Well, good.

Whoa!

Wait here. Definitely freaking out.

(GASPS)

(HORN HONKING)

Oh, no! It's gonna gobble us up!

We've gotta get off this thing! Ow! Hey! No! What're you doing?

Just stop it! I'm saving you, it's going to eat us!

What's going to eat us? Crazy guy back here! Help me!

I am helping you!

You can thank me later, just hold on!

No, no, no, no!

Don't you dare. (SCREAMS)

(BOTH SCREAM)

(WHOOPING)

(SIGHS)

That was some rescue, huh?

(GRUNTING)

Whoa! What have you done?

They were taking me to my zoo! Your what?

Wait!

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! Wait!

You can't go in there. It's not safe! You're not safe!

Get off! Stop!

Wait for me!

Oh, she's gonna get eaten! Okay. Whew. Okay. Whew.

I gotta save her, again.

(GRUNTING)

(YELLING)

(PANTING)

(BLINKY GRUNTS)

Oh, no!

No, no, no, no!

This isn't happening. (BREATHING HEAVILY)

Happy thoughts. Deep blue sky. Deep blue sky.

Oh.

It's just a cave with a hole in it.

Come back! Please! Don't leave me out here with him!

What is this place? We are in the middle of nowhere because of you!

Ah! You know you're pretty strong for a cage.

Koala.

(COUGHS)

Hey, what's so great about this zoob anyway?

Zoo, fuzz-nut. It's just the best place in the world.

Somewhere you definitely do not need saving from.

We have heated spa baths, cafes and movie nights,

manicures and little leafy treats.

(SIGHS)

Hey! My dad will know where your zoo is.

I'll take you to him! (SCOFFS)

Trust me. He's the best explorer in the outback.

Know who's the second best? You're looking at him.

The name's Blinky Bill! I'm pretty legendary around here.

Maybe you've heard of me? Nope.

Well, trust me. Any trouble comes our way, I'll give it my famous

whip-kick to the guts. Hyaaa!

(RIPPING SOUND)

You get the idea. Yes.

Yes, I do. (SPITS) Paws in?

I promise, I'll get you to your zoo.

(SPITS) Okay. Deal.

But if you get us lost, I smash you.

Fine. And if we get eaten, I smash you.

Okay, okay.

I got it, cagey. It's Nutsy.

Nutsy? That's your name?

(CHUCKLES) It suits you. Ow!

You make fun of my name... You smash me?

You're learning.

(SNARLING)

(EXCLAIMING)

MRS. BILL: Knock, knock! (GASPS) Who's there?

Mum! Mum who?

Very funny, Blinky.

(GASPING)

(IN BLINKY'S VOICE) Oh, er, don't come in. I'm very naked.

Blinky, it's nothing I haven't seen before.

Oh, you'd be surprised. Hey,

I'm going to rally the villagers against Cranky. I could use your help.

Er, I'd love to, Mum.

But I need to clean my room.

Hmm? Really? Are you feeling okay, Blinky?

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Coming!

Phew!

(KNOCKING CONTINUES)

Okay! Okay!

Don't get your pouch in a knot!

(SIGHS) Kids!

(BOTH GIGGLING)

(GROANING)

What kind of a koala's scared of heights?

A zoo koala!

The tallest thing I've ever climbed up is a concrete stump, okay?

Sorry! Just making conversation.

Well, don't! (PANTING)

I know what you're thinking, anyway!

Zoo koalas can read minds! Yeah!

Like, right now, you're thinking...

"Can she really read my thoughts?"

Hey! How did you kn... (LAUGHS)

(SIGHS)

Hmm. Well, can zoo koalas jump? Huh?

'Cause you're standing on an ants' nest.

What? Ants! Where? What? Who? Relax, they're harmless.

Unless they get into your ears and eat out your brains.

(LAUGHS) (GASPS)

(SCREAMS)

(GRUNTING)

Ants don't build nests!

(SIGHS) You got a lot to learn about the wild!

(GRUNTING) Stupid rock! Where are we going?

Up!

Dad says the higher you go, the further you see!

NUTSY: Ergh! Can someone please tell me

what's so great about the Great Outdoors?

Seriously, you've got dirt, ants,

no toilets, weird little flies.

The things that eat the weird little flies.

Did I mention dirt?

(CHUCKLES)

Relax, cagey. You've got to trust your wild side.

Right now, my wild side wants to tear you a new pouch.

Come on, mo-poke. Hey! Would you just wait?

Wait!

(GASPS)

Wow!

Dad never said the desert was this...

Big. Whoa! Beep, beep.

Back the truck up. You've never been in the desert before?

I thought you were wild.

I am wild! I can run and jump and kick and stuff...

Argh! You're lost!

Admit it! You've got no idea where your dad is!

Huh? I've gotta get back to the road.

Wait! No, no, no, no! I really know where he is!

He's at the Sea of White Dragons.

What sea? I don't see a sea.

You're just making this up as we go along! No.

I promise, it's a real place.

I can find it. Pah! You couldn't find your nose with your finger.

Can too! See!

(TRUMPET BLOWING)

Shh! Wait here.

(EXCLAIMS) What can I say about dear old Jacko?

Such a great little guy. Hero.

Lover. Teller of classic jokes. What a weird little lizard?

(MUMBLING)

But if he had one drawback, just one little drawback...

It's his "Freaking-out-of-control..." Are you okay?

Am I okay? Am I okay? Oh, yeah. (NERVOUS LAUGH)

I'm great. I'm great. I'm just hangin' around,

shooting the breeze here. For six freaking days!

She wants to know if I'm okay?

Am I okay, Jorge? Jorge says I'm okay.

Where are you gumsuckers off to?

The zoo. The Sea of White Dragons.

(GASPS)

The Zoo of White Dragons! I know exactly where that is!

Let me down and I'll show you.

He's bluffing.

How dare you! Frill neck lizards never bluff!

Don't listen to the lizard-hater toots. I'm a tracker.

If I can't find it, it doesn't exist.

Definitely bluffing. Come on, Blinky, just get him out.

I suppose. Dad says always help those in need.

Oh, not the tail! Very sensitive there! Ah! Let go! Let go! Let go!

Okay. Ah! Why'd you let go?

Okay.

See ya, suckers! Ha-ha!

What did I tell you?

Time I hit the trail!

(LAUGHS)

(SNARLING)

What's that about my tail, huh?

Nothing, nothing. I said hit the trail. Not the tail!

Please, please! Have mercy. I already have enough issues!

Oh, poor dear.

Got a reptile dysfunction, have we?

At least my tail grows back. Goodbye!

(SCREAMING)

Run Nutsy! (GROWLS)

(SNIFFING) Hmm. What do we have here?

Entree and main course.

Leave her alone! Or what?

Or he'll smash you!

This is Blinky Bill.

The meanest, toughest explorer in the whole outback.

Maybe you've heard of him.

(GASPS)

Oh my!

Really?

Not the Blinky Bill.

Behold the great and wonderful Blinky Bill!

Whip-kick him, Blinky.

(LAUGHS MOCKINGLY)

Oh, yes. Whip-kick me, Blinky.

Okay.

Okay, you asked for it!

(GROANS) Is that it?

Well?

Huh?

(SQUELCHING)

Yuck! NUTSY: Blinky!

I'm going to tear you apart!

Run for it!

(SNARLS)

No one panic. I'm okay!

(ALL SCREAM)

(GROWLING)

Help!

No, stop! Stop the ride! I wanna get off now!

Hey, see anything you like?

My cage!

(SOBBING)

Leave it. We gotta go.

I'm scared, Blinky. Ah! (NERVOUS LAUGHTER)

Everybody gets scared right? Ow!

Okay...

BLINKY: How about you, Jacko?

(GROANING)

Are you scared?

Me? Always.

Ha! See?

Now, come on. Let's get out of here.

Oh. Oh, right. That's it? Not even a goodbye?

Don't worry about little Jacko, he'll be just fine...

(MEOWING)

Hey! Hey! Wait for me! Come on, I'll join you. I can be your sidekick.

I'm very funny, you know, I can tell lots of jokes. I'll keep you laughing,

I'll keep it amusing, I'm very good company! I promise! I'll keep you up!

Not at night, but I mean up, up in spirits...

You know, I wasn't always like this.

Once my frill was the pride of my family log.

But all that changed the day Jorge came to town.

And I will not rest until I've had my revenge on that

jumped-up son of a... Now which way?

Erm...

(GROANING) We'll never find your dad!

Well, sure we will. Watch and learn.

(COUGHING)

Goodness gracious me! That's not how you track!

Work with me, work with me you stupid thing!

(GRUNTING)

This rock is...

(BELCHES) Not a rock!

JACKO: Okay!

Meep, meep, meep.

(IMITATES RADAR BUZZING)

Check out the lay of the land.

Position yourself with the sun.

Follow wild animal tracks.

(NERVOUS CHUCKLE)

Croc, damper, lizards.

Just hold on!

No...

JACKO: Try, try, try. Oh, yeah!

BOTH: (YELL) That way!

That way! Oh, sure,

if you want to die. Ignore him.

That frill's sucking all the blood out of his tiny little brain.

Hey, back up, fluff-knuckle.

This desert's full of crazy-eyed nut-jobs with big teeth.

I'll find your Seam of Wild Drongos. Trust me.

I'm Jacko and I track-o! You're a whack-o!

Come on, Nutsy. Nutsy?

No offense, but everything you've done so far has kind of

ended in disaster.

Hey! She's not coming back-o.

'Cause you just got the sack-o.

NUTSY: Come on, Sulky Bill!

Who's sulking? You're sulking!

I'm glad I'm on my own!

Yep!

You go your way, I'll go mine.

(PANTING)

(MEOW SOUND ECHOES)

(GASPS)

(WHIMPERS)

I told you we should've gone with Blinky. What?

(LAUGHTER)

(BOTH SCREAM)

(CROWS CAWING)

(KNOCKING ON DOOR)

Knock. Knock. (NORMAL VOICE) What? Who's there?

No, really. I've forgotten my lines...

Who am I? Bad news, Blinky.

Ah, yes.

Blinky! No-one will stand up to Cranky.

They're all scared. (IN BLINKY'S VOICE) Ah, I'm sorry, Mum.

I've been a very naughty koala.

Ha, well, you do have your moments.

I just wish I was more like Robert

so clever and handsome.

Well, I wouldn't go that far.

Robert has his problems too. (SIGHS)

I wish we could go looking for your father.

But you're all I've got.

If I lost you, I don't know what I'd do.

(SNIFFS)

You won't lose me, Mum. I'm right here.

Behind this door. Oh, Son.

(WEEPING) Oh, Mum. I love you, Blinky.

Oh, Mummy, I love you too...

(NORMAL VOICE) I mean, ah, Blinky loves you.

Well, I do too, but... Robert?

Where? Who? Oh, me!

Woop! Woop! Woop! Mum alert!

(IN DIFFERENT ACCENTS) Attenzione! Achtung!

C'est une catastrophe!

Emergenza koala!

She knows too much! Robert! Hide!

Er, hi, Mrs. Bill. Kids!

Where's Blinky?

You two think you're so smart, don't you, cagey?

(LAUGHS)

I'm glad you and old freaky-frill aren't slowing me down.

(ECHOING) Gotta be tough, tough to survive out here.

That desert sun can make you a little crazy.

Right, guys?

(BRASS HORNS PLAYING)

(LAUGHS)

(BELLS CHIMING)

(LAUGHS)

Yep, yep, yep, you shouldn't have given up on

old Blinky rinky dinky Bill.

Because you never give up on your mates!

But I didn't give up on her, Dad,

she gave up on me.

Dad!

Dad, wait!

(GROUND CRACKING)

(GASPS)

(LAUGHTER)

Looks like I'm having koala for lunch.

(FLIES BUZZING)

Wha...

Lunch is served.

(LAUGHS)

Care for some pie?

Huh? Huh?

Mmm! Pie!

It's mainly rotten wattle seeds and dogwood.

'Course the maggots get in so there's a bit of protein.

(GROANS)

(GOBBLING)

Sorry about the whole net thing, there's a lot of predators out there.

Hmm!

Oh, sorry, Suzy! Where are my manners?

Let me introduce you to the others.

This is Fred.

Fred runs the cafe down by the creek.

Don't order the lunch special,

not worth the aftertaste,

if you know what I mean.

(FARTS)

His aftertaste, or ours?

And this is Suzy!

Ah, she used to play flamenco in a band.

��The old gray strings

��They ain't what they used to be... �

What? It's nothing to be ashamed of, love.

So, call me Wombo.

I'm Nutsy. Nutsy!

Very nice. Classy.

You're obviously the leader of this mob.

Well that's a load of old... Yes.

And these are my sidekicks, Jacko, and Fleabag.

(CHUCKLES) Nice to meet ya, Fleabag.

Blinky, Blinky Bill.

(GASPS) Well, shave my belly and call me a dugong!

Are you Old Bill's boy? Yes! You know him?

Do I? We go way back.

How is the old budgi-smuggler?

I don't know. He went off to find the Sea of White Dragons and...

Never came back. The Sea of White Dragons?

Oh, you mean, Croc Canyon?

So it is a real place?

Oh, my oath, it's real. Ah, crazy Bill.

Always took things one step too far.

So, where is it and how do we get there?

Why, it's just the deepest, darkest

most terrifying hell-hole in the entire desert.

Way off in the Never Never, where the galahs don't even go.

Nobody who goes in ever comes out,

alive that is. (CHUCKLES) (SCREAMS)

Take my advice and turn back now.

Yeah, yes, yes, yes, great advice.

Listen to the crazy fat old wombat, Blinky.

No! We have to find my dad. Yeah. And my zoo.

(SIGHS)

Crazy koalas.

Well, if you're going to Croc Canyon, you'll need a ride.

Yay! (LAUGHING)

(IMITATES ENGINE REVVING)

Come on, girls!

(CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY) Erm, maybe we can walk from here.

What's that? You want a little radio?

(MIMICKING STATIC)

And they're away! Tutankhamun, an early leader.

Yesterday's Lunch threatening to come up on the outside and Pinocchio...

On three, we run for it.

One, two... Ahhh! Good day, petals!

Where youse off to? I must apologize for Beryl. She was dropped as an egg.

Je m'appelle Cheryl. The classy one.

(SCOFFS) Pull the other one, sis.

You're about as fancy as an indoor dunny.

(GASPS) Beryl! Manners! Excuse the French, kiddies.

Well, hello, ladies.

Oh dear!

Who's the frog? Frog? What?

Here's your ride. (CHUCKLES) Whatever floats your boat.

What? You didn't think I was crazy, did you?

Thanks for coming so fast, girls. Blinky and Nutsy here,

well, they need a lift to Croc Canyon.

BOTH: (GASPING) Croc Canyon!

(BOTH LAUGHING)

CHERYL: Croc Canyon! Ah, that's a good one.

Seriously, where youse going?

Croc Canyon.

BOTH: Oh...

I tried to warn them. But you know koalas, stubborn as a box of rocks.

They're looking for Blinky's dad, old Bill.

(GASPS) Sacrebleu!

You don't mean old Bill, the cane toad?

No, droopy draws! He's talking about old Bill, the echidna.

The koala, remember?

He saved you from the quicksand, twice.

Oh, Bill Koala!

Emus, big hearts, tiny brains.

Don't worry, they'll get you there.

Oh, we owe Bill a feather or two.

Hop aboard, darls.

Oi, Careful! My feathers can get a bit... (SHRIEKS)

Slippery. (GROANS)

Hey, wait for Jacko! I'll sit up the front with you, toots.

(GIGGLES)

BERYL: The other end's prettier. Huh?

(LAUGHS)

Wombo, you coming? Nah. Suzy'd hit the roof.

Good luck, young fella. (NUTSY SQUEAKS)

Thanks, Wombo! Ready, Nutsy?

Time to make tracks!

Let's get this party started!

Go on, get out of here, you lot.

ALL: Bye-bye!

(IN A SQUEAKY VOICE) That's the last we'll see of them!

They've got no chance!

(NORMAL VOICE) Ah, they'll be all right. I hope.

(GRUNTING)

Cranky, stop! Blinky's gone bush. (HISSES)

I have to save him.

Out there? Impossible!

By Royal decree, I strictly, categorically and absolutely

forbid all residents from leaving Goannasburg,

except koalas.

Yes, I forgot. How silly of me.

May you have a long and eventful, one-way journey, Mrs. Bill.

(CHUCKLING)

This isn't over, Cranklepot.

You kids look after each other.

Bye, Mrs. Bill. Careful, Mrs. Bill!

Good luck!

Quickly, seal it. Seal it!

(SCREAMS)

CHERYL: And then I see Trevor on the dancefloor

and he's giving me that look, you know?

Oh, yeah? Yeah.

So I strolls over, looking all chic.

Mmm-hmm.

(LAUGHS) Oh, you look ridiculous!

All right. Watch and learn, sister.

This is how you strut up to a bloke.

Hello, Trevor!

Ha! You've got Buckley's,

getting a bloke's attention like that!

You got to prowl like a Tassie tiger. (GIGGLES)

All slinky like.

No. You got to lay it on much smoother than that, sis. Oh!

You got to swerve the curves.

Oh, my goodness. That works for me!

I'm swerving it. I'm swerving it.

I'm swerving it, (NUTSY SHRIEKING)

Oops. Oh, sorry, darl. I'll keep it straighty 180 for you.

First time on an emu? It's okay.

Don't freak out. I'm not freaking out. (SCREAMS)

(CHUCKLES) Well, it kind of looks like you're freaking out.

(SCOFFS) So funny I forgot to laugh.

Oh, come on, cagey.

It's time to get a little wild.

(BLINKY EXCLAIMS) (SHRIEKS)

Yee-ha! Whoo-hoo!

I feel so alive!

Get it off! Get it off!

I could get lost in those eyes.

(BERYL SCREAMING)

NUTSY: Beryl...

JACKO: Oh, wow!

NUTSY: Whoo-hoo!

(NUTSY WHOOPING)

I'm doing it. I'm doing it!

That's great, but you're doing it too slow.

(CHERYL LAUGHS)

Take them! (LAUGHS)

Go, buddy, go!

(GROANING)

JACKO: Yeah, let's fly baby, fly!

NUTSY: Eat my dust!

Go, Cheryl, go, you good thing! Fly, girl!

(ALL WHOOPING)

CAT: You lie, wombat!

WOMBO: Okay! Okay, the koalas were here!

But you'll never catch them! They're on emus!

Really? Thanks for the tip.

Wait! Wait! Did I say emus? I meant tigers.

Say goodbye to Suzy, freak!

Ferocious Tasmanian tigers.

No! You filthy feral feline!

(NUTSY SLURPING)

(BURPS) Ah.

Zoo water never tasted this good. Yeah.

My dad says the possum poop gives it a real kick.

(EXCLAIMS) (LAUGHS)

Mum never laughs at Dad's jokes either.

She must really trust you.

Letting you come out here on your own.

Er, yeah.

Well, the thing is, I kind of maybe,

didn't tell her I was leaving. Blinky!

(JACKO SLEEP-TALKING) You little frog-sucking wretch!

(LAUGHS) Yes, Jorge! We meet again!

And this time, the advantage is...

Oh, butterfly!

(CHUCKLES) Crazy lizard!

I can't believe you ran off on your mum!

I didn't! I'm going back!

Anyway, you can talk. Where's your mum?

(SIGHS) I hardly remember her or Dad.

We lived in this huge green forest.

Until the fire came.

I remember flames and smoke everywhere.

And when it cleared, they were gone.

Some humans found me in a burnt-out tree.

I've been in zoos ever since.

You're all alone?

I've had lots of families,

just not my own.

Well, there's always room in Greenpatch for another koala.

Even a cagey one.

I belong in a zoo. (LAUGHS) You feel pretty wild to me!

(CHUCKLES)

(SNIFFS)

BERYL: What about Errol, Cheryl?

CHERYL: He's dating Meryl, Beryl.

BERYL: Meryl? Ugh. She's totally feral.

How about Daryl? He's with Carol.

Gerald? Mmm-mmm.

Harold! Oh, you don't say!

This is it, mon cheries! Croc Canyon!

Whoa!

It's just like Dad said it would be.

Except a million times bigger and deeper and scarier.

Are you sure about this, Blinky?

Er... Yep!

Remember what Wombo said,

"No one ever comes out of here."

Alive, that is!

Not too late to back out, kids.

Excellent. Excellent. Yes, yes, back out.

There's no shame in being a coward.

(JACKO GROANING)

Well, there's a little shame,

but not like the shame of being dead!

My dad's alive and I'm gonna find him.

But if you want to turn back, I don't blame you.

Really? Oh, phew! Great.

Okay, but if you get us munched.

I smash you. Okay. We're going in.

We?

Bon voyage, kids! It was nice knowing you!

(SIGHS)

If I don't make it,

just remember I've always loved you, Beryl.

Je m'appelle Cheryl. She's Beryl.

Hmm, same diff...

Hey, wait for Jacko!

This is why koalas are going extinct.

(GASPS) Oh, no!

Oh, Wombo! (WOMBO GRUNTS)

What happened? Are you okay?

Oh, Betty! Betty, you're a sight for squinty eyes.

Be a mate and unclip us, would you?

(GROANS)

(GROANS)

Suzy! Hang in there, Suze.

I'm coming.

Wait a minute.

Did Blinky do this? Goodness, no.

(SIGHS) That crazy cat who's hunting him did.

What? Oh, don't worry!

Blinky's got a good head start on him.

He's on his way to Croc Canyon. What?

Wombo! We have to stop him!

Stop him, how?

'Course she's not my girlfriend. Don't be so dippy.

Jeez, here we go, the waterworks. Don't cry, love.

Don't cry, I'll bring you back something nice!

WOMBO: How about a new hat?

Wombo, we're taking your car.

Yeah good id... Wait a whisker. I'm the crazy one here.

Blinky, not so fast.

You're doing fine.

Just don't look down.

Don't look down? It's all down!

Oh, I should have stayed in my log.

(GRUNTS)

(SHRIEKS)

BLINKY: Dad? Dad?

Dad?

Dad?

I wonder why they call it Croc Canyon?

Maybe they mean rock canyon.

Where are you? (SNIFFING)

What's that smell? It's kind of like rotten...

...lizard. Not me...

(SNIFFING) Hmm, well, perhaps it is me.

Dad?

(GRUNTS) Oops.

(WHISPERS) I've got a bad feeling, Blinky.

(WHISPERS) I second that emotion.

(WHIMPERING)

(GASPS) Hey, look!

Dad!

Hey, Dad! Down here! Dad! Shh!

Dad! Blinky!

(MUMBLING)

(CROCODILES ROARING) (ALL YELLING)

Run!

Wait for me!

JACKO: We're related! We're related! (SCREAMS)

Hey, we're just brothers from another mother!

(ROARING) (JACKO SCREAMS)

(WHIMPERING)

BLINKY: Come on! Come on! Come on!

Climb! Climb!

I am climbing, I am climbing! (YELLING)

(SCREAMS)

Blinky!

(ROARS)

(GROWLS)

How did... (LAUGHS)

Surprise!

Doesn't he ever give up?

(SCREAMS)

He's gone! Come on!

(GROWLS)

BLINKY: We've almost made it, guys!

No, you don't!

(ALL SHRIEK)

Come on Nutsy, we got this! No, wait!

Really?

(BOTH SCREAM)

(GRUNTING)

(GROWLING)

Nutsy! Jump!

I can't. It's too far!

(GASPING) Blinky!

Come on!

Oh, no!

Yes!

Nutsy, back up!

(SCREAMS)

(NUTSY GROANING)

BLINKY: Don't move. Oh, I can't look.

Ho, ho, ho. I can.

What?

It's too far for me to carry us both across.

Ah! Bulls-eye!

Do that again and I'll eat you first!

(WHIMPERS)

Nutsy, I've got a plan.

(THUDS)

Hey! Fish-face! Yeah, you! What's the matter, croc got your tail?

Now!

BLINKY: Whoo-hoo!

Oh, yeah! Whoo-hoo! You did it!

Hey, guess what? I think you just invented the cat-apult!

(LAUGHS)

Back off, dinosaurs.

Oh, those Crocs will be coughing up some big fur balls.

(SIGHS) Blinky, does saving me always have to be this scary and painful?

Dad! Ha!

(PANTING)

Dad!

Dad! It's me!

It's Blinky...

(SNIFFS) This...

This is his hat. What the...

Blinky?

Huh?

No...

Dad.

Th... Th... That's his swag.

Dad! Dad! Dad, where are you?

Dad? Oh.

Yoo-hoo? Mr. Bill?

Oh! (SHUDDERS) No...

Dad. It can't be.

Hey, those bones could be anyone's.

This is his hat.

You can't give up!

Yeah. (SIGHS) Dad used to say that too.

Come on, Jacko.

I'm sorry, Mum.

(SIGHS)

You were right.

Everything I do ends in disaster.

(SHIVERING)

I'm sorry, Nutsy.

But I'm gonna do one thing right.

I'm going to get you home.

It's what Dad would have done.

(JACKO SNORING)

(SIGHS)

(SLEEP-TALKING) Oh, no. I'm not a crocodile.

Oh, Blinky.

I've been watching lights going in and out of there, all night.

I think that's your zoo.

Really? You think so?

Only one way to find out!

(YAWNS)

What's for breaky, sweet-cheeks?

Hmm, what? What'd I miss?

(BOTH PANTING)

Oh, now that is definitely a lake.

Er, it's a mirage.

What about those shady trees, then?

(SIGHS) Mirage.

(HORN HONKING)

BERYL: What about that opera house-shaped car being driven by a wombat?

BOTH: Definitely a mirage.

Hello, me little lovelies! Where are the kids?

(SNORING)

Well, I guess this is it.

Ahem, well, I guess this is it.

Uh-huh. Yep. Indeedy-do.

End of the road. The old zoo-mcgoo.

Home-sweet-home...

Yay.

I'm actually gonna miss you, Jacko.

Oh, cheer up, toots.

We'll always have Croc Canyon. (GIGGLES)

Are you sure about this?

Whoa! (CHUCKLES NERVOUSLY)

Thanks, Blinky.

It's been an adventure. (LAUGHS) Yep.

Definitely an adventure.

Bye.

(GRUNTS)

I guess you're a real explorer, after all.

That makes two of us.

Hey...

I'm not scared of heights anymore.

(EXCLAIMING)

Is there still room in Greenpatch for a cage koala?

Nope.

You're not a cage koala. You're wild.

So get your fluffy butt down here.

We're going home.

WOMAN: Lost, little guy?

(BLINKY GROANS) Don't worry.

Huh! We'll look after you.

Oh, no, no, no, no, no, no, no!

Huh?

Hey, brainiac, you got the wrong one!

Quick, Jacko, we have to save him! Oh!

(GROANING)

Easy, little guy.

Once you get your shots, you can join the other koalas.

Let me out!

(SQUEAKS)

��Swing me higher, baby-cakes �

Oh, yes. That's nice.

Hey! Hey, buddy! Over here! Help me!

(GRUNTING)

I don't belong here! I'm wild!

Hey, new guy. Zip it.

You don't want to wake old feather-brain.

You zip it! I have to get back to Greenpatch.

Greenpatch? Blinky? Dad?

Get out of here!

Dad! Blinky Bill?

Where are you, Dad? I'm here, Son.

(LAUGHS)

Oh, Dad! Blinky! How'd you get here?

Are you okay, Son? You first. What are you doing here?

What happened to you, Dad?

Oh, mate. The Sea of White Dragons happened.

Some call it Croc Canyon,

some call it the Down-underworld.

Most take one look and call it a day.

It's, paws-down, the most blood-curdling pit of despair

I have ever clapped eyes on.

With giant rock walls all the way up to the sky.

Oh, further, mate.

And filled with scaly tooth monsters

with beady little eyes.

But you can't show them any fear!

Oh, no. They smell fear.

All you can do is grab your gumnuts and run.

Yeah! And jump!

From rock... ...to rock. Nearly there.

One more jump. It's a biggie. One, two...

BOTH: Three!

(LAUGHING) And you make the other side!

Oh, just!

I was chewed up real bad.

Croc teeth sticking out all over me

like some kind of crazy echidna. (LAUGHS)

I guess I must've passed out.

When I woke up, I was here. But...

Hang on a bilby whisker.

How'd you know about...

Were you there? Yeah.

Shut your leaf hole!

My boy got through Croc Canyon?

Are you okay, Son? Yep.

We were nearly croc snacks, too.

We? Is Mum with you? Betty?

Love! It's okay. Mum's at home!

She doesn't even know I'm gone.

(SCREAMING)

Well, it's good to hear Mum's safe and sound.

Erm, not quite.

Cranky's taken over Greenpatch.

He's gonna throw Mum out of our tree. What?

Oh, that slug-sucking bilby-tickler.

If I could only get my paws on him.

But you can! Let's go kick some Goanna butt! Dad?

Come on! Greenpatch needs us.

Mate,

I've been trying to come home since I got here.

I did this last week trying to jump the boundary wall.

It can't be done.

There's cameras, zoo-keepers, alarms,

that big-mouth parrot. No one ever gets out.

But what about Mum?

Oh, I'm sorry, Blink.

No! There's got to be a way out!

You promised Mum, you said you'd come home!

(SIGHS) I promised a lot of things.

(SIGHS)

Mum. Blinky? Mate?

Oh, Blink.

(SCREAMING) (ROARING)

(GRUNTS) Shh!

Come on, Jacko. Huh?

The first place they take you is quarantine. Oh!

Warren who?

No escape. If I don't get out, nobody does.

Oi, parrot, would you shut your...

(BEEPS)

BLINKY: Hmm.

Hey, Dad.

Blinky? I think we can do this.

Oh, mate, I've tried.

You never had me.

Yeah, well, that's true.

What do us adventurers always say?

Always fart downwind?

Yeah, the other thing.

An adventurer never gives up.

And? An adventurer...

BOTH: Keeps his promise!

Too right! And you promised Mum you'd come home!

Grab your gumnuts, Dad.

We're busting outta here. (SPITS) Paws in?

That's my boy. (SPITS) Paws in!

(BOTH LAUGH)

(SNIFFING)

CHERYL: So I says to Prince Charming, if you like it,

put a ring on it.

The kids were definitely here.

You said something about a zoo, right?

Got it! Okay.

(GRUNTS) Yes!

(LAUGHS) (SNORING)

(GROANS)

(GRUNTS)

That's it!

(GRUNTING)

Higher. Cripes. What's mum been feeding you?

BLINKY: (WHISPERS) Nearly there.

(CRASHES) Dad, the fan!

BLINKY: Stop! (GASPS)

(BLINKY GROANS)

(SQUEAKS)

(GRUNTS)

(SHRIEKS)

MAN: I'll just go grab it out of the truck.

Ca-caw! Ca-caw!

Birdy num... (MUMBLES)

Come on, mate!

Okay. Here goes.

(GRUNTING)

Ah, yes, the drain, what a brilliant idea.

(SCREAMS)

(GROANS)

BILL: Yeah, yeah, yeah! Almost! Almost!

BILL: Push the thing!

Whoa!

Come on, Son, get a wriggle on!

Got it!

Blinky? Huh?

Who's that?

Whoa! Blinky!

Blinky!

I'm a bad boy (SNORES)

(LAUGHS)

Oh, I've missed you, Son!

I've missed you so much too, Dad!

Shake, Nose. Boomerang returns.

Cheeky.

Right left. Whip-kick. Whoa!

(LAUGHS) Easy there.

So you going to introduce me to your girlfriend then?

What? Oh. Er...

She's not my girlfr... We're not...

This is my friend, Nutsy.

I've heard so much about you, Mr. Bill!

Don't believe any of it!

Oh!

(SQUEAKS LOUDLY) Intruders!

Wild animals! Help! Security! Oh!

WOMAN: That is one crazy bird.

Good afternoon, welcome to Parrot Radio.

For your listening pleasure, may I present to you,

a breakout people! (CAWS)

Security! Dad?

Right! We're going out the window!

Move! Ah! Okay, maybe the door.

With their backs against the wall, our koalas look cooked.

Will they climb their way to freedom, dear listeners?

Of course not! Are you crazy? No one ever gets out!

Hey, check camera two. Security! Security!

I'm okay! Don't panic!

Quick, everyone in there!

Mmm, I like her.

One, two, three. (ALL GRUNTING)

Go, go, go! I wouldn't go down that way if I were you.

JORGE: A break-out, people! This is not a drill! (CAWS) Jacko!

You!

You!

(GROANS)

JACKO: Whoa! Phew!

Clear.

(ALL GASPING)

Let us never speak of that again.

Hmm, well, I did try to warn you.

MAN: Check the perimeter. They can't have gone far.

(ALL PANTING)

Those koalas have got to be around here, somewhere. Check over there!

Cripes. They're onto us.

We'll never get through. MAN: I think they're over here somewhere.

Maybe we can go over? Over?

How? You mean, like fly?

Son, that's crazy!

I like it.

Well, well, well.

Hello, Jacko.

Hello, Jorge.

Wait a minute, you two know each other?

Oh, yes. Yes, we do.

You go. I'll deal with the parrot.

Are you sure? Yes, go!

This ends now, gibbet!

(LAUGHS) You said that last time, grub-sucker,

yet here we are.

How did it come to this?

I loved you like a brother!

You fool! I am your brother!

What? That's impossible!

Is it, Jacko? Is it?

(BOTH YELLING)

(PANTING)

Come on, Dad! (GROANS)

(ALARMS BLARING)

MAN: (OVER PA) All personnel to sector four.

We have a marsupial escape in progress.

I repeat, wild koalas in sector four.

Dad, grab some rope to tie things together.

Over there. Yeah, got it.

Nutsy, something wide and strong.

Er, that wavy see-through stuff.

Are you sure about this, Blinky?

It'll work. Trust me.

JORGE: Return what you have stolen!

Return what you have stolen!

JACKO: Ow! Ah! I don't know what you're talking about.

Do you take me for a turkey?

Ow! Ah! Stop! Stop, stop, stop!

Liar! I saw you! Flashing your frill at my beautiful Consuela!

How could you?

Con, Consuela? What? No, no, no, you've got it all wrong.

Do I, lover boy? Yes, yes, yes you do.

She wasn't interested in me. Or you.

She said she was leaving. With Trevor.

(GASPS) Not Trevor!

With those infernal fancy tail feathers!

Oh, I'll track down that over-stuffed bush turkey!

And when I do, I'll be doing the plucking.

Trevor! Yeah, yeah that's great.

Hey, Jorge. Yes, brother?

Er, with you having a new nemesis and everything.

Hmm? Would you mind getting off me now?

MAN: Where the heck are those koalas?

They can't have just vanished.

MAN 2: Hey! What the... I don't believe it!

Cop a gander of this, would you?

MAN: Who's driving that thing?

That's the hairiest cabbie I've ever seen.

MAN 2: Wasn't your missus, was it?

(LAUGHING)

MAN: They'll give a license to anyone these days.

Once we get inside, we'll split up. Come on!

(PANTING)

Done. Hmm, I think.

(WHISTLES) NUTSY: (GASPS) Jorge!

Hey! It's okay.

The parrot's with me. BOTH: Huh?

Sweet shining skink eggs.

What is that?

This is our way out of here.

JORGE: What! He's joking, right?

It'll work. Come on!

Huh, and I thought you were nuts. Hold me, brother.

I'm too young to fly!

Er, guys, we need to hurry.

What in the blue blazes? How did...

We're gonna need a ladder!

(GASPS)

The humans have seen us!

Everyone, on my count push as hard as you can.

Got it? (CHUCKLING) Now this is what I call an adventure!

Yes, indeed.

An epic tale of a peppy little kitten's struggle

against the forces of koala-dom.

(GASPS) Sweet mother of dog! The tail-biter!

Fair go, mate. I was trying to save you from a trap!

You would've died.

Dad? Stay behind me, Blinky!

I would never ask for your help.

And now, you'll pay.

(GROWLS)

Back off, kitty!

(GRUNTS)

(GASPS) Dad!

I'm going to turn you into a snuggy.

Get off him! (LAUGHS)

BLINKY: Go, Dad!

Blinky! (SCREAMS)

Blinky! No!

No, you don't! The koala is mine!

Blinky!

To the flyer! We're not leaving without my boy!

(BOTH GROANING)

Whoa, look out, cat!

Everyone, push as hard as you can.

Push harder, Jacko!

If I push any harder, something's gonna come out.

JACKO: It worked! Don't worry, Son! We're coming for you!

(ALL YELLING)

Oh! Oh, right! What now?

Whoa!

Need a lift? JACKO: Ladies!

After my boy! Tout de suite, Mr. Bill.

Stop running, meat snack.

You're only making me hungrier!

Come on, girls, crack the whip!

JACKO: Go, baby cakes, go!

It's working, Cheryl!

We're flying! Oh, we're really flying!

JACKO: Whoa! How do you control this?

Come on!

Blinky! We're coming, mate!

JORGE: Just try not to get eaten!

Dad! Grab the rope!

(GROWLS)

(BLINKY GROANS)

Right, well, that worked better in my head.

I'm going to go down and get him.

Are you crazy? They don't call her Nutsy for nothing.

Remember how you used to be completely terrified of heights?

Well, forget that, don't remember it.

Not helping! (SCREAMS) Nutsy!

Huh?

(GROWLING)

Whoa!

Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! We have to get out of here!

I'll swing you in!

(YELLING)

Shh. I don't think we're alone.

(LAUGHS) Oh, don't worry. I soon will be.

Blinky! Whoa!

Nutsy!

(HISSES)

(GRUNTS)

(NUTSY YELLS) Oh! Not again!

Grab the rope, Blinky! Okay!

(GROWLING)

(GROANING)

(LAUGHING) Oh, yes.

(SIGHS) Playtime's over.

Time to explore the afterlife!

(WHIMPERS)

Get your paws off my son!

(GRUNTS)

Mum! Oh! You are so grounded.

(MEOWS)

This time, I've definitely got you!

(GROANS)

Grab, the rope...

Hang on tight! Grab the rope.

Oh! Help!

Mum, this is my friend Nutsy. (GROANING)

It's a pleasure.

(ALL YELLING)

I will devour every last one of you!

(ROARING)

Huh? (MEOWS)

Take her up!

Ah, yep. On it!

(GRUNTS) Come on, you son of a skink!

(ALL SCREAMING)

Quick! My friends will save us!

Pah! Who needs friends when you've got nine lives?

(GROWLS)

Huh?

Mummy.

NUTSY: Whoa!

(ALL GROANING)

Mum, Nutsy, are you okay?

(SIGHS) Yes.

I knew you'd make it, Blinky!

(LAUGHING) Looks like koalas can fly!

Love! Bill!

Oh!

Oh, you're in trouble!

I know, I know. Ow.

But just let me explain. (SIGHS)

It was like this...

I, er, well, the thing is...

I kind of maybe stuffed up.

(GROANS) I love you, you old gumnut!

I love you too, sweet leaf.

I swear I'll never leave home again.

Anyway, Greenpatch has got a new adventurer now.

He saved us all.

I had a little help.

A little? (ALL LAUGH)

(WHIMPERING)

Beryl, you okay, darls?

Sorry. I'm not a very good flyer...

(GAGS)

Er, hate to break up the party. But who's steering this thing?

(ALL SCREAMING) MRS. BILL: Paws on the wheel!

Paws on the wheel!

Me? I can barely fly horizontal!

Blinky! It's yours!

(GRUNTS)

(ALL YELLING)

(ALL WHOOPING)

Wacko, the Diddlo!

You don't see that every day! (CHUCKLING)

BILL: Whoo-hoo! Greenpatch, here we come!

(PLAYING TRUMPETS)

(SNICKERING)

My dear Goannasburgers.

I am honored and deeply humbled to be here before you today.

(SNICKERS)

Now bow! Bow before your king. (ALL GASP)

On your knees, wretches!

(LAUGHING)

(GASPS) Hello, Crankypants.

William! You're alive.

Ready, Blinky? (LAUGHS)

Operation Goanna Splat is, go!

(LAUGHING)

Extraordinary!

Whee! (GIGGLING)

Higher, Uncle Cranky! Higher!

Whee! (GIGGLES)

(GASPS) Uh-uh! Not so fast!

The kid said higher. (GROANS)

(GASPS)

ALL: (SHOUTING) My turn! Me!

(SIGHS)