Original subtitles

Bingo.

G-48.

Bingo!

Bingo.

- Man, Bonehead's really swinging! - I do believe.

Well, if it's all that good, let's give it a chance.

I don't think that's it.

A shot in the mouth? That's exactly what Dennis Frank...

Do you have a headache? The answer is Witch Doctor's Aspirin.

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo.

That's the name of the game

Take a blanket made for two, now

Add a boy and a girl

That's a game for me and you, now

Yeah, let's give it a whirl

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo

That's the name of the game

- Every lad and... - Every lassie

Playing down by the shore

- Looking smart - And looking classy

Yeah, they're learning the score

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo.

Beach blanket bingo

That's the name of the game

That's the name of the game

When a lad just meets a lassie

And he asks for a kiss

Then he finds the lassie sassy

- Right blanket! - Wrong miss!

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo.

Beach blanket bingo

That's the name of the game

Play the game like you should do, now

That's the start of the fun

When you find the girl for you, now

Bingo! You've won!

Beach blanket bingo

Beach blanket bingo.

Beach blanket bingo

That's the name of the

That's the name of the...

That's the name of the game

Bingo!

Hey, look!

"Hear Sugar Kane's... "

We can read, Goo Goo.

Hey, look at that!

Remember, as close to the boat as you can.

I'll land in the captain's lap.

- You do, and I'll... - Bye-bye!

- It's a girl. - It figures.

Somebody must have left the door open.

That's what I call a high dive.

Hey, it's a free fall!

- Hey, look at that! That's great, huh? - That's wild.

Boy, that's out of sight! It's too much. Wow!

- Do you think that's a publicity stunt? - Well, sure it is.

Man, that's sure some stunt.

Well, what if she's in trouble? We should help her.

Oh, look, don't panic. You see that rich boy's canoe out there?

He'll pick her up. Boy, are you gullible!

See, what'd I tell you?

Dee Dee, a smart promoter could sell you Grant's tomb.

Oh, no. I've got sense enough not to buy that again.

Gosh, I wish I could do that.

You just did, kiddo. Now get out there and take the bows.

Gee, I'm a little scared.

Look, somebody paid a lot of money for this stunt.

Don't louse it up now.

- Well, isn't it kind of cold? - Only on the top.

They didn't pick her up. What's the matter with those guys?

I don't know. Let's go find out.

Hold it. If they passed her up, I have a feeling we should, too.

Come on, Bonehead.

Come on, you guys, let's go!

- Come on, you guys! - Let's get her!

Perfect. Earl, take a look at this.

And now it's our move.

All right, men. This is one of my big ones. Oh, hi, girls.

I can see the headlines now. "Singer saved by surfer. "

Perfect. There's a pearl for you, Earl.

Yeah, I wish I'd said that.

Oh, you will. It's all yours. Anything for the column.

Sugar's out there.

- Hey, what's going on? - You'll see.

Put your arm around her, boy.

- Hey, what is this? - Don't be a problem. Perfect.

Hey, look, if I put my arm around someone, I like it to be my idea.

You're a hero, boy.

You just saved a beautiful young girl from the jaws of the deep.

Got that, Earl? "Jaws of the deep. "

Yeah, I'm gonna keep that one for my wallet.

- I have a feeling she didn't need saving. - Yeah, but Frankie might.

You kids know who this is? It's Earl Wilson, the famous columnist.

- Who's she? The BW? - What's a BW?

Well, in Earl's column, it always means his beautiful wife,

only this one isn't.

- Beautiful, yes, but wife, no. - Haven't you ever heard of Earl Wilson?

Oh, you'll have to excuse Bonehead. He hasn't even heard of President Wilson.

Well, Mr. Wilson has come all the way out from New York

just for this one interview, right, Earl?

- You might say that. - I just did.

Is she somebody or something?

"Is she somebody?" Where you been living, in a cave?

You're close.

Come along, now, and let's get out of these loose clothes

and slip into something tight.

I'd like to see her slip out of something tight

and into something more comfortable, like my arms.

Just think of me as your father.

Now I think we're ready.

Now, that's what I call a healthy girl.

Sugar Kane doing her first free fall...

in honor of her album of sky songs, Come Fall With Me.

What's up, boss?

Shut up. I'm thinking.

How long will that take?

Until I get it thunk.

Perfect. Oh, we need our little hero in a picture.

I can make it on my own.

- I didn't catch your name, boy. - I didn't throw it.

That's pretty tacky, boy.

I didn't want us to have a language barrier.

That's enough pictures. Don't want to tire her.

Let's dig this groovy chick. Come on.

How far did you fall before your chute opened?

- How does it feel, falling? - Hey, where'd you learn the free-fall bit?

At Big Drop's Skydiving Club. It's just over the hill.

- How do you know when to pull the cord? - Before you hit the ground, Goo Goo.

Yes. Well, it's sort of hard to explain.

You see, when you're falling, it's like...

Well, I get the feeling I'm somebody else all the time.

I think we'll be more comfortable up at the beach house.

And I'll get Sugar to sing for you. Excuse me.

Little Sugar's too excited to talk right now, fellas,

and Earl's waiting to interview her.

But I'll tell you what. Keep in touch.

Here, have my card. Take one. They're free.

Now, that's pretty tacky.

Oh, a smartnik.

But tomorrow, boy, look for your picture in the paper.

Come along, sweet.

Sugar lives right up the beach. You're all invited anytime.

Come on up and hear her latest album.

- Bye. - Frankie.

- Bye, Frankie. - All right. Come on, dear.

"Bye, Frankie. "

Looks like Frankie's done it again.

Yeah, and he struck a real gusher this time.

You stupids!

I'm through thinking.

Now, what I'm thinking is,

that poor little Sugar Kane is mixed up with undesirables.

Well, Eric Von Zipper's gonna protect her.

I think I adore her. She's nifty.

- That skydiving looks like fun. - Like to try it, boss?

Eric Von...

Eric Von Zipper thinks cycles is better.

- Right? - Right.

We go!

Eric Von Zipper ain't gonna get left behind this time.

Jerome, you... Me...

It's a wiggy beach.

Okay, ready?

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

Go, Donna!

You ask me if I ever long for him

Since we said goodbye

Sure, I get sad But it's not too bad

It only hurts when I cry

You see, I hardly even think of him

As time goes slowly by

I just go on like there's nothing wrong

It only hurts when I cry

Sure, I remember our first kiss

The way I loved him then

Sometimes I think a love like this

Could never happen again

So please don't worry if I sigh for him

You know that I'll get by

I'll just pretend that it's not the end

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry.

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

Sure, I remember our first kiss

The way I loved him then

Sometimes I think a love like this

Could never happen again

So please don't worry if I sigh for him

You know that I'll get by

I'll just pretend that it's not the end

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

It only hurts when I cry

- Dee Dee, I've been thinking. - About what?

- About Sugar. - Oh, really?

No, I mean about skydiving.

Boy, it'd be a new thrill up there. Just imagine that feeling.

Yeah, like a bird. When do we start?

We?

Well, sure. It'll be a new thrill up there.

Yeah, for me, but not for you.

A girl's job is in the kitchen,

at least until she learns how to cook a hot dog.

Dinner was burnt.

Women have a few rights, in case you haven't heard.

We can even vote.

- Yeah, that's the real American tragedy. - Very funny.

Okay, play your little game.

But when the time comes, I do the jumping and you do the watching.

Come on, let's turn in. We'll want to get an early start.

- Hi, Butch. - Hi.

Bingo!

Well!

Mark Anthony and Cleopatra have returned.

You know something, Bonehead? You remind me of the ocean.

- You mean I'm so deep? - No. You make me sick.

I think I'm sorry I asked.

Hey, fellas, what do you say...

we hit Big Drop's tomorrow and make the skydiving scene, huh?

Yeah, that's a good scene.

- How about you, Bonehead? - I ain't gonna jump out of no airplane.

- I may be dumb, but I'm not... - Bonehead, don't put it to a vote.

I'm going with Frankie tomorrow to try the skydiving bit.

- Any of you girls with me? - Sure!

Hey, you girls are crazy.

- Why? You fellas are gonna do it. - Yeah, but boys are different.

I've noticed, and I'm glad.

Now, that's my kind of people.

You girls are so anxious to jump, why don't you jump down here?

I'll guarantee you a happy landing.

I'd rather jump out of an airplane without a parachute.

Either way you get to heaven.

Hey, that's a good-looking kid.

- Yeah, she's not bad. - I wasn't talking about her.

See? You're crazy about him.

One look at a picture in the paper and you're nuts about the guy.

Oh, come off it, will you?

Hi, kids. Welcome to Big Drop's,

where everything is sky-high but the prices.

- Hi. What's up? - Hi.

- I'm Big Drop. - Big Drop?

It's just a nickname.

They used to call me Big Droop, but I had it shortened.

Seems to me I've seen him somewhere before.

That's Buster, my helper, and Bobbi, his helper.

Looks like she could use a helper, too.

It's just good, clean fun. Keeps him out of pool halls.

Come on in and look around.

Look around you, gang.

It isn't much, but we like to think of it as our home.

This is Bonnie and Steve. They help me run the place.

- Hi. - Hi, gang.

Hello, there.

These kids want to learn all about skydiving.

Free fall and everything.

Of course, free fall isn't really free, but it's cheaper than expensive.

I assume you children want to learn all about skydiving?

- This child does. - This child's from Wig City.

I buy that.

All right, I'll leave you kids with Bonnie and Steve.

If you brought money, I'll see you in the office.

I saw your picture in the paper this morning.

It didn't really flatter you.

- It was my bad side. I was facing front. - That's cute.

We really do want to learn skydiving.

She has some crazy idea she wants to try it.

Why not? Bonnie's made over 100 dives, and she's still in one piece.

You can say that again.

Why not? Bonnie's made over 100 dives, and she's still in one piece.

- I mean, I'm sorry. - You don't have to apologize.

He does to me.

Best way to learn is to watch. Bonnie and I'll show you a double free fall.

Well, maybe first you ought to explain some of the dangers involved.

The only dangerous part is driving to the airport.

- Come on, I'll show you. - Let's go, guys.

- And you can show me. - My pleasure.

- Hey, ladies first. - Go.

There she goes!

Oh, look at that!

It's beautiful! I can't wait.

Look, Dee Dee, Bonnie is an expert.

I learn fast.

Look at that!

Hey, there's Bonehead.

Perfect.

- What happened? - Well, he was surfing, and...

She saved him, that's what happened.

This poor boy was out there floundering helpless,

and Sugar swam out and pulled him in.

- She's a heroine. - Bullets, I...

Sugar, don't be modest. We all know what you've done.

Just rest your head back on Sugar's lap, boy.

Sure.

All right, everybody watching? Sugar, cry a little.

Perfect. I've done it again. Tell me your name, boy.

Well, everybody calls me Bonehead.

- Oh. Well, what do your friends call you? - Stupid.

This calls for a celebration.

Tomorrow night, supper at Sugar's. How about it, kids?

- Separate checks? - Aren't you getting shorter?

Don't be late, kids. Come along, Sugar.

Up, boy. We got the picture.

You know something? I just don't know.

You know something? With your luck, you don't have to.

Well said.

You tired? Chalk.

Whoa! Got an itch?

You know, the name of the game is pool, bubby.

Now, you gonna play it or not?

You know, I shaved twice since you last shot.

Von Zipper plays when Von Zipper is ready.

Cue. Powder.

Will you... Will you... Not here, here.

Let me know when you're going to play, bubby.

Hey, boss. Come here.

Out! I'll murder you at the zoo tomorrow. Go.

All right. Later, daddy.

- Did you lose this, boss? - Oh, stupid.

- What? What is it? What? - Read this.

- Look at the picture. - What does that say?

"Skydiving singer saves surfer. "

Read me more.

Slow. Read slow.

"Di-min-u-tive

"Miss Sugar Kane is enter-training

"the local surfters and... At a diner tomorrow at her beach home.

"Also, plans will be disgusted

"for Sugar's new album and concerning the surfters. "

That does it.

Them rotten surfers ain't gonna get away with it this time.

Us good guys are gonna save Sugar from them beach bums what don't work.

- Boss... - Our work is never done.

Our work is to protect the weak and the innocent.

Fall in!

What are you... Will you... Why... Why do you put...

If there's a battle to be fought

Go to the battle then we ought

And so

Let's go!

Follow your leader

He is his ideal

Follow your leader

He has nerves of steel

With my muscles, I'm impressed

Not to mention all the rest

Follow our leader

I am my ideal

Them rotten surfers we must fight

- Wipe out them surfers, ain't that right? - Right!

And so

Let's go!

Follow your leader

He is his ideal

Follow your leader

He has Rat appeal

Look at these two fingers now

We'll give them the finger now

Follow our leader

I am my ideal

Follow your leader

He is his ideal

Follow your leader

He is a big deal

I'm the greatest, I admit

I've got class, I'm full of it

Follow our leader

Follow your leader

- He is - I am

- His ideal - My ideal

- Right? - Right!

All right, kids,

and I guess you always will be for the rest of your lives.

Old Bullets has a real treat for you.

Miss Sugar Kane doing a number from her new album, Come Fall With Me.

New love

He's my new love

He understands

When I hold his hand

And say

I feel so blue today

True love

That's my new love

He's there by me

To tenderly just say

I love you more each day

Not bad. Not bad at all.

I've noticed you noticing.

Professionally. Singing, you know.

New love

He's my new love

He'll always be

So close to me, I know

I love my new love so

True love

That's my new love

I know that he will always be

My new

New love my whole life through

I know that he will always be

My new

New love my whole life through

So glad that he will always be

My love

That's it, fellas.

Crowd around, crowd around. Smile, Sugar.

This could be the cover for your next album.

Stop the music! Stop the music! Stop the music!

Stand aside, everyone. I take large steps.

Well, looks like the carbon monoxide commandos are back.

Look, fellas, don't make me call the pest control.

I am Eric Von Zipper,

and I come here to tell you that these beach bums is bums,

and ain't nobody making no album with them.

They can make it with me and my cycles. You could call it Come Cycle With Me.

Oh, perfect. You'll hear from us. Next.

I got one more thing.

Eric Von Zipper adores you.

And when Eric Von Zipper adores somebody, they stay adored.

- That's stupid. - That's stupid.

I am my ideal, but you are my idol.

Hey, Von Zipper.

Why don't you crawl back under your rock?

Leave him talk. He ain't through.

Thanks, J.D. That's short for Juvenile Delinquent.

From the looks of him, you wouldn't think he'd ever make it.

Oh, it wasn't easy, but I helped him.

And these is my two mice, Puss 'n' Boots.

- I am pleased... - I am sure.

I thought up them names myself.

You know something? I believe you.

My idol used to be Marlo Brandon, but he did a moving picture about cycles.

He made them cycle guys to be bad guys, so he ain't my idol no more.

You are. I could teach you how to cycle.

- Well, thanks, but... - Not too close, Sugar. He's a carrier.

Oh, yeah. I could carry her on my cycle. It's a nice, healthy sport,

out in the wide open spaces, just like us. It's nifty!

Now, if you hurry, you can find lots of wide open spaces

just off the premises.

Him, I don't like.

You, he don't like.

Can I depend on that?

I am even thinking of giving you the Hima...

- The Hima... - ... layan.

The Himalayan suspenders treatment.

The Himalayan suspenders?

There's definitely a language barrier here.

It's sort of a judo thing. Professor-type fella taught it to him.

Oh, yeah, there's really nothing to it, see.

- All you do is you take your finger... - Watch it, boss.

Oh, I ain't gonna do it, not to me, I ain't.

- Is this right? - That's...

- He done it again. - Only different.

- Yeah, she gave him the finger. - By remote control.

Oh, I love this game. Can you move it out of here?

Come on, let's get him out.

Careful, careful. Don't break him.

He's fragile. Careful.

Eric Von Zipper will return.

Oh, we can't wait. Crawl in anytime.

Tooty-toot, Mouseketeers.

- Have you seen Bonehead? - No. Who looks for Bonehead?

Well, I'm worried. He hasn't been himself lately.

On him, that should be considered a piece of luck.

Come on, let's sneak away and talk about us.

- You came out to look for me. I'm glad. - Hey, you're the one.

But when I came to, Sugar was there.

I knew something was fishy.

That's very funny, what you said.

Well, what I mean to say is thank you for saving my life.

You don't have to thank me.

- Do you live around here? - Yes, I live around here.

- Well, can I come and see you sometime? - You're seeing me now.

Well, I mean... Hey, swim in with me and meet the gang.

- No, I'm sorry. - Well, can I see you again?

Tomorrow at this same time.

There's a cove about a half a mile down the beach.

I know where it is. I'll be there.

Oh, I don't know your name.

- Lorelei. - Lorelei. That's pretty.

- Is there a last name? - Just Lorelei.

There is something else you should know about me.

- Yes, what? - I'm a mermaid.

Some of my best friends are mermaids, Lorelei.

See you tomorrow.

You know something? You really are one.

I told you I was.

Well, I knew something was different about you, but not this different.

- Do you still want to meet me tomorrow? - Gosh, yes. More than ever.

I've never known a girl with a...

I mean, I'll be the only boy in my block that knows a real, live mermaid.

- You know what I think? - No, what?

I think

You think

I think

Love doesn't mean a thing

- I think you think... - I've got news...

- ... I think... - ... For you

...Love means a wedding ring

- I think... - You know...

- ... That... - ... You think...

- ... It's true - ... I think

Love's just a runaround

- You... - I think

- ... Know that's... - ... You think...

- ... Not true - ... I think

It's time we settled down

- With all this thinking going on - With all this thinking going on

- It really seems to me - It really seems to me

- I've been thinking a lot about you - I've been thinking a lot about you

- And you've been thinking a lot about me - And you've been thinking a lot about me

- Well, I think - Well, I think

- You think - You think

- Why think? - Why think?

- Let's get together now - Let's get together now

You know

- I love you - You know I love you

I think

You think

I think

Love doesn't mean a thing

- I've... - I think

- ... Got news... - ... You think...

- ... For you - ... I think

Love means a wedding ring

- I think... - You know...

- ... You think... - ... That...

- ... I think... - ... It's true

Love's just a runaround

- You... - I think...

- ... Know that's... - ... You think...

- ... Not true - ... I think

It's time we settled down

- With all this thinking going on - With all this thinking going on

- It really seems to me - It really seems to me

- I've been thinking a lot about you - I've been thinking a lot about you

- And you've been thinking a lot about me - And you've been thinking a lot about me

- Well, I think - Well, I think

- You think - You think

- Why think? - Why think?

- Let's get together now - Let's get together now

You know

- I love you - You know I love you

You know

- I love you - You know I love you

You keep your feet together, knees slightly bent,

rolling to the right or left,

taking the force of the impact on your hips and your shoulders.

Do not look down. Keep your eyes horizon-level at all times.

- Now, you want to try? - Okay.

Bend those knees. There you go.

Very good. Not bad. Did you see the roll?

- Frankie. - Yeah?

- You want to give me a hand with this? - Sure, if you'll show me how.

- Oh, it's easy. Just hold onto it. - All right.

Now give me your hands. Fasten the chest strap.

- It's right here. - All right.

- Is this right? - Yeah, nice.

Looks like your friend and my friend are getting pretty friendly.

Now hand me the leg straps.

Good.

- Got it? - Yeah.

Looks like Bonnie's friend is just a little jealous.

And you're not?

You're darn right I am. I'm so mad I could jump.

Be my guest.

- Excuse me. - Oh, hey, we're not through.

Maybe you're not.

- Hey, you're doing all right. - Yeah, so are you.

You mean... Oh, lay off, will you?

- Dee Dee, I love you. - Don't you "I love you" me.

What?

Hey, Bonehead! You missed a real kick.

I was right. Bonehead's really left the scene.

Yeah.

Let's see if we can put him back in focus.

Bonehead.

Hey, Bonehead.

- Bonehead! Remember me? - I got something to tell you.

- Tell, Bonehead. We're all ears. - Her name is Lorelei.

- Whose name is Lorelei? - This girl, the one who saved me.

Butch.

Bonehead, the girl who saved you, her name is Sugar. Sugar Kane.

No, that's what everybody thinks, but it isn't so.

Her name is Lorelei, and she's a mermaid.

Boney! Boney, are you there?

Hey, I think I've got it.

If anything will pull him out of a trance, this will.

Be right back.

Bonehead, is there anything you need? Anything I can get you?

Just Lorelei.

Yeah.

Now, all you have to tell him...

is that he asked you to the pavilion tonight.

He did?

At the party at your house. That's what you tell him.

But I remember he didn't.

Well, look, I know he didn't, but say he did as a favor to me.

I'm trying to pull him out of a trance.

If it's for you, Frankie, I'll do it.

- Thank you. - Besides, he's kind of cute.

- Bonehead? - Sugar says it's A-okay for tonight.

- For tonight? - Yeah, at the pavilion.

You asked me to go.

- I did? - Well, sure!

And she's all set, aren't you, Sugar?

I hear you're a real good dancer. I just can't wait.

Well, swell.

You mind if I talk to Frankie alone for just a minute?

Go right ahead.

You know this stuff about Lorelei?

It must've been one of them mirages or something.

Sure. We all get them.

- A mental mind is a terrible thing. - Man, you know it.

And, Frankie, please, don't say anything to anybody about the mermaid.

My lips are sealed.

Thanks for coming along, Earl.

I know this isn't a fancy New York nightclub,

the kind you're used to, like the 21 Club.

Hi, honey. You look great. And I'll put you right on.

I've got good news for you, Big Drop.

Don't tell me. Let me guess. You're leaving?

Now, you gotta stop making me laugh.

I've got Sugar Kane here with me, and she'll sing for you.

Who needs girl singers? Not Big Drop.

I'm in an echo chamber.

For your information, I've also got Earl Wilson here with me.

Who needs girl singers? Big Drop.

Tell Miss Kane it'll be our pleasure.

- Perfect. I'll go tell Sugar. - What is she gonna sing?

Don't worry. The group's got her music.

Earl? Earl! There you are. Right over here, Earl.

Sugar, here's Earl again. And this is... Oh, forget it.

Welcome, kids! Welcome to the pavilion.

I want you to know that sitting in our audience right here,

one of the greats.

So great, Earl, I get the chills every time I mention your name.

One of the greatest writers... He's cute.

One of the greatest writers of our time, a sweetheart of a fella, Earl Wilson.

Let's hear it for him.

You're great, Earl. It's nice to see you.

And I want to tell you something as a friend.

Somebody tell you you're 11?

Get rid of that hairdo. You know what I mean?

You don't need the crew-cut haircut.

It's a little embarrassing, because at your age, Earl...

Please, believe me.

You act as though you were in the sandbox and you flunked.

You know what I mean, kid?

Frankie and Dee Dee. Hi, Frankie. Hello, Dee Dee.

Stand up and get sick for the audience.

You two 43-year-old yo-yos skipping around the house.

Grow up! You're a man already, Frank.

How long can you stand in the bathroom in front of the mirror

going "samba, samba, samba"?

You're 43, Frank. You're old and wrinkled.

Did you ever hear yourself sing, Frank? I bet you scare trains.

You sing, Frank, you sound...

I'll be my...

You're old. Let me hear you say one note. Say...

Wrong! You see what I mean?

That's what I mean! This kid cannot sing.

And I want you to know one other thing, Dee Dee.

I never liked your personality.

You know what I mean? You're too short for this type of work.

What are you, a seal?

You're Bonehead, right? Bonehead, I'm a friend.

I spoke to the Board of Health. You're gonna be condemned.

Do yourself a favor. Try this. Spell "pussycat. "

Smart as a whip, huh?

But I want you to know something. I have nothing against kids.

I don't mind... I don't mind kids as a whole.

In a group, they annoy me a little bit.

So we're in for a big treat. Right, Hondells?

Right.

We have a marvelous singer here, and she's Miss Sugar Kane.

So here she is, Miss Sugar Kane and the Hondells.

Fly boy

Fly boy.

I want to tell you about a friend of mine

I love him so he drives me out of my mind

- She's gonna be a big star, right, Earl? - Yeah. She's very good.

The biggest. Big with the kids, too.

Flying in his flying machine

High in the sky now we're making the scene

He's like an angel well, you know what I mean

They shouldn't be dancing! Boy. Big Drop!

He's my fly boy

Up in the sky on top of the world

We're in heaven above

He's my guy and I'm his girl

What a way to fall in love

I bet Dee Dee would rather be dancing with you.

And you'd rather be dancing with Frankie.

- I didn't say that. - You didn't have to.

- How'd you guess? - Oh, it was fairly easy.

You're nuts about the guy. You can't take your eyes off of him.

Well, I was never a subtle type chick.

Okay, you want games? I'll go along.

We're up in the sky on top of the world

We're in heaven above

He's my guy and I'm his girl

What a way to fall in love

What a way to fall in love.

Now I know he's got me under his spell

- Did she maneuver this? - Sort of.

You're not doing her any favors by letting her get away with it.

He's my fly boy

Fly boy

My fly boy

He's my fly boy

And Earl just thinks you're great. Tell her, Earl.

- Congratulations. - Thank you.

You're in, honey.

- Come on, Bonehead. Let's go. - Go? We just got here.

I don't mean just go. I mean go, go, go, like dance.

Oh, sure!

Did you ever do anything like that, Earl?

Once back in Ohio, when I got caught in a swarm of bees.

- Bonehead, you're just not with it. - I guess you're right.

Would you like to take a walk along the beach?

Sure!

Oh, isn't it wonderful? The water's so beautiful.

Yeah, it sure does cool off our dancing dogs.

Yeah, it's real cool.

- Do you hear that? - Hear what?

Music, real soft and pretty.

I hear the music from the pavilion. It's pretty, but it sure isn't soft.

Well, I've been wrong before.

Something bit me! I'm getting out of here.

It's a people bite!

Well, what do you know?

I'm late for a date.

Hey, Frank.

I was only kidding before about your singing.

I know you can sing. Come on up here and prove it.

These are

The good times

While we are young

No chance untaken

No song unsung

These are the good times

Life goes your way

Loving each moment

Of each new day

While the meadows are green

Free as the wind are we

Sharing a dream

Living our destiny

These are the good times

Long as you care

All of the good times

We'll always share

I'm gonna give him a bravo. He's terrific.

- Oh, you think so? - Yeah.

Sugar taught him everything he knows.

Sharing a dream

Living our destiny

These are the good times

Long as you care

All of the good times

We'll always

Share

He sings like a bird.

Yeah? Well, let's see if he can fly like one.

Hey, Frankie, you'd better turn in early. Tomorrow you make your first jump.

Nice of you to let me know.

Don't let him push you, Frankie. You're not ready.

Frankie does all right at everything he tries.

- I've noticed. I think he's ready. - You're cute. Like a cobra.

I'll see you tomorrow at Big Drop's, and if you're late, I'll start without you.

- Now get lost. - Sure.

Are you gonna let him tell you what to do?

- What would you have wanted me to say? - You're not only stubborn, you're stupid.

You know, she's got a point.

Lorelei?

Lorelei!

- Frankie, this is wrong, and you know it. - She's right, Frankie.

- Let's hope not. - He's so full of pride and integrity.

Yeah, he's full of it, all right.

Look, Dee Dee, I'm not gonna chicken out. If Steve thinks I'm ready, I'm ready.

- Steve, is he ready? - It's up to Frankie.

Let's go.

Well, looks like I'm on.

What are you waiting for, chickie baby, to lay an egg?

So long, Stevie!

There he goes!

Hey, that's way out. Too much.

That kid's got no guts. I told you he was chicken.

Frankie, you were just great!

I couldn't have done it better myself, if I could've done it.

- Which I wouldn't. - It was wild!

Hey, where's the plane? I want to do it again.

Hello.

Oh. I made it from the parachute I found on the bottom of the ocean.

Does it please you?

Well, it's not that, Lorelei.

Oh. Well, mermaids can have legs for a short time on land.

- I thought that would please you, too. - You were sure right about that.

- Can we sit and talk? - Sure.

There's lots of stuff I need to know about you.

You sure have pretty legs. For a fish, that is.

- How come you speak English? - Well, mermaids speak all languages.

We've helped sailors from all the ports of the world for thousands of years.

I'm not a sailor, but I was a Sea Scout.

- And I'm sure glad you helped me. - Well, so am I,

because in all my 300 years, I've never met a human I really liked.

You're 300 years old?

- Gosh, you sure don't look it. - Well, I suppose I never will.

You mean you'll always look like this?

Wow!

Well, that means... Just wow!

- How long can you keep your legs? - Until midnight.

- Then what? - Well, then I return to the sea.

- You ask too many questions. - Just one more.

Will you go out with me tonight?

And I want you to meet a couple of friends of mine. Okay?

- But you won't tell them I'm a mermaid? - Believe me, they wouldn't believe me.

- I've got to buy you some clothes. - Clothes. I'll never understand why.

Neither will I. What size do you wear?

Size?

Well, I guess we'll have to work this out by hand.

Now, let's see. Bust.

- About like that. - Do that again. I like it.

Please, Lorelei, I'm busy. Now, waist.

About there.

And hips.

Well, that ought to do it. Oh, no. Shoes.

Exactly two for one.

Now, you wait here, Lorelei, and I'll bring you everything you need.

Bonehead, do that first thing again, please.

Well...

Lorelei, do you know about the birds and the bees?

No.

Well, I better get out of here, or you're gonna find out.

- Wish me luck, Frankie! - Look, Dee Dee, this is crazy!

I was only putting you on when I said you wouldn't jump.

Oh, get buster here. Women can't do anything.

They can't jump. They can't fly.

Be my guest. I'll show you.

Okay, I'll go. Just to make sure she doesn't jump.

She'll jump! She's all heart. I'll show you I'm all heart.

If her chute don't open, she don't owe me a cent.

Look, Dee Dee, you don't have to prove anything.

I believe you want to do it.

I believe it, too, and that's what I have to prove.

I wonder if I'll ever get the nerve to do that.

I wouldn't advise it. You'd have too much to lose. Me.

Okay, Dee Dee, step outside and get some fresh air.

Dee Dee, you're not gonna go through with this.

You can stop me if you want to, Frankie, but please don't.

I have to do this for me. Do you understand that?

- Her chute didn't open! - She's gonna do a free fall.

Pull it.

She made it.

When a girl makes up her mind, she gets anything she wants.

- Now we're gonna talk about you? - Us.

- Somebody's got to drive this thing. - It's on automatic pilot.

- Now, Bonnie, listen. I... - You listen.

Here we are, all alone, way up high.

Just the two of us.

- Yeah, but somebody down there likes me. - Well, somebody up here likes you, too.

Bonnie, you may have turned it on automatic pilot,

but I'm not on the same switch.

You don't get all your kicks from surfing, do you?

Well, of course not, but this is ridiculous.

It's really wild up there.

She's got the plane on automatic pilot.

- But why? - It's hard to fly with your arms full.

- No dice, Frankie? - I'm not even in the game.

Well, I just dealt you in.

Steve won't like this very much.

Look, Bonnie, you're a nice kid. You don't need all this phony jazz.

I'm not used to having people say no to me.

Well, that's the trouble.

If more people said no, you wouldn't act like this.

I'm gonna break him in two.

There's something you should know. Frankie's small, but he's wiry.

Steve!

Oh, Steve, I just can't tell you what happened!

I can.

It was terrible, and there I was, helpless, all alone up there.

- I suppose he put it on automatic pilot? - Steve, he forced me.

- Come off it, Bonnie. - Hey, why don't you wise up?

Keep out of this. Nobody makes a monkey out of me.

Now, wait a second. You listen to me. This whole thing is your fault.

If you'd get off the jealous kick with Bonnie,

she wouldn't be looking around.

It's not me she's interested in, or anybody else. It's you.

That's right. You.

She just wants proof you care about her, and this is her way of getting it.

So if you really care, you ought to let her know it

and knock off the silly games.

- Maybe he's right. - He may be right, but he's gonna be sorry.

Nobody makes a monkey out of Steve but Steve.

Well, I hope it fits.

The lady in the store was real nice about making sure.

Okay.

- You like it? - Wait till the gang sees you.

Let's go!

High heels.

You shouldn't wear them in the sand, anyway.

Here.

You will have to forgive me. It's my first time, you know.

Yeah, I know the feeling.

I remember the first time I wore shoes. It was about a year ago.

They go a lot of places

And they have a lot of fun

Hill climbing in the mountains

Or for a desert run

And when I get a little bike

Now, you can just bet

I'm gonna be a member of the cycle set

I'm gonna take my money

And I'm gonna put it away

And bank every paycheck when it comes to payday

Dance.

I'm gonna pay it up in cash

So I won't be in debt

Then we'll ride my bike

With the cycle set

Of the cycle set

I saw a little bike and the price was just right

So I'm gonna take my money

And I'll pick it up tonight

And I'm with a real pretty chick

That I just met

We're gonna ride together with the cycle set

Come on, Dee Dee, let's dance.

- Let's go, Lorelei. - Bonehead?

Gee, I don't feel like a bonehead with you. I feel different.

Tell me more about the birds and the bees.

Well, it's like when you get a certain feeling coming over you.

- You mean, like falling in love? - Yeah, that's it.

And I'm beginning to get it now. Maybe we'd better dance.

I'm gonna ride my cycle

With the cycle set

If that's dancing, I'm afraid I can't do it.

Well, when this is over, I'll ask him to play something slower.

We're gonna ride my cycle with the cycle set

Earl, I don't know why you're so crazy about this place.

I just want to do a little more research.

- Which girl is it, Earl? - Oh, come on now.

They must've raided the place.

We'll sit over here, Earl.

That's indecent. They're touching each other.

I knew there was something about it I liked.

Why me? Why me all the time?

It's a shame there wasn't soap in it. It would've been his first bath.

Hey, that was nifty, boss.

You see anything funny in that?

- She likes it. - What?

It's the Black Plague.

Do you find this type of fun relaxing?

Start the music!

Where's Sugar? Where's my idol?

- She ain't here, boss. - Yeah, we been looking around.

Later we will go get her 'cause I adore her.

Hey, boss, look!

I seen his pictures in the column in the newspaper I read to you every day.

That's Earl Wilson. You know, Earl's Pearls.

Oh, sure!

Hey, Earl, how about tossing a pearl?

Before swine?

That's good. Right like that, he... Him, I like.

You just lost a lot of points, Earl.

Please, do not destroy my mood. Tonight, I even like you.

Oh, perfect. I'll save the next dance for you.

I lead.

Come on. Let's go find my idol.

- It's almost time. - Oh, yeah. We gotta be going.

Do you have to leave so early? We're just getting acquainted.

Well, I promised Lorelei I'd get her home before midnight.

What, does she turn into a pumpkin or something?

Something like that.

It was nice knowing you. I hope to see you again.

- Thank you. - It's nice meeting you.

- Nice meeting you. - Oh, come on, Goo Goo.

Good night.

- Good night. - Good night.

- Bye. - She's a nice girl.

Yeah, but there's something strange about her.

I don't know. She just seems out of place. Like a fish out of water.

Okay, now, everybody quiet.

I don't want nobody to wake up my idol until I wake her up myself.

'Cause I adore her.

- Right? - Right!

Quiet, will you?

You stupids! This ain't no way to run a kidnapping.

Sorry, boss.

Do like I do and you will learn things.

Jerome, fix it.

Follow your leader.

My hat. Where's my hat? My hat.

Be quiet. Quiet.

Next time I bring you stupids along, I will go by myself.

My idol fell asleep with the TV on.

Marlo Brandon never looked like this.

Get her some clothes.

I don't want no idol of mine to freeze, 'cause I adore her.

What are you doing?

I'm glad you asked that question,

because I, Eric Von Zipper, am putting the snatch on you.

Snatch?

Yeah. I'm kidnapping you, only it's more romantic, like eloping.

- Did Bullets think this up? - I, Eric Von Zipper, thunk it up.

- I think it's marvy. - Nifty.

- You need any help, boss? - No!

I'd rather do it myself.

Whoa. I may... Gee, she's...

Help me. Help me!

I've always worn this. Now I want you to wear it.

Bonehead, I love you.

You said what I was gonna say. Only, why so sad?

- Because we have to say goodbye. - Goodbye?

I'm sorry.

If I didn't love you, it would be easy.

But if we love each other, why can't we take what we have now?

Don't tempt me.

The memory of it would haunt me for the rest of my life,

and for me, that's a long time.

You know I'm right.

You are what you are, and I am what I am.

We just don't belong.

Lorelei.

Please don't. I'm going home now.

Easy, easy. That was good. This time you even hit the white ball.

See? You're learning. I bet you them beach bums

ain't never been in a decent pool hall in their lives.

Are we playing pool, bubby, or is this all a lousy dream?

There happens to be a lady present.

- I apologize. - That's nice.

And after you learn pool, I'm gonna learn you how to cycle.

You're gonna become Eric Von Zipper's progidy.

- It all sounds marvy. - Yeah, nifty.

Hey, how would you like a malted?

Sounds super!

Well, why are you standing here? The lady wants a malted.

Get her a malted! And make it a double!

A double!

All right, out with it. What did you do with her?

I didn't do anything.

She went under this wave, and that was the last time I saw her.

He drowned her. This brute drowned Sugar Kane!

- Sugar? Who's talking about her? - Sugar's missing?

I missed her at 8:00 a. m. bed checks. She's gone!

Know anything about it, Bonehead?

Just 'cause I was burying clothes

doesn't mean I know anything about Sugar.

Burying clothes?

It is kind of a coincidence. You have to admit that.

Those were Lorelei's clothes. Lorelei, the mermaid.

- Mermaid? - Oh, Lorelei's a mermaid.

Sure. She took her clothes off and went back into the ocean.

I didn't know what to do with her clothes, so...

- Oh, what's the use? - What's the use?

Relax, Bullets. It's all my fault.

Sugar and I cooked it up between ourselves for a publicity gag.

Drowning as publicity?

- Even I wouldn't do that. - Look, nobody drowned anybody.

Headlines. "Girl singer disappears. Found by boy surfers. "

Good for you and good for us, right?

Perfect.

I should've thought of it myself. Now, where is she?

Give it a few more hours, and you'll have her back. I promise.

She'll be on the beach this afternoon right after Frankie and I do our free fall.

She will? I mean, she will.

You know something? You're a good kid, kid.

I'll get right to the papers, and if anybody asks,

I did think of it myself.

- All right, Bonehead. Now, where is she? - Well, I thought you said you knew.

I only made up that jazz to get rid of Bullets.

Now, come on. Let's have it.

Look, Frankie, I'm being honest. I don't know anything about Sugar.

I took Lorelei home last night and we said goodbye.

Bonehead, Frankie is only trying to help. He's your friend.

- He's not even listening! - Listening? Sure I am.

- Don't you hear it? - Hear what?

So long.

- See you later. - Wait a second.

Don't forget what we told Bullets. This afternoon, she'd better be here.

"Von Zipper?"

That's it. And with my help,

you're gonna be the best lady pool player in this entire pool room.

Marvy!

- Before the Rats come back... - The mice want to play.

- We could kill that kid. - That's the idea.

Leave it to old Slim. I got ideas,

and they're all vile, baby.

- Marvy! - Marvy!

You're a regular Minnesota Fats.

It's all right, Sugar, I'm here.

- You stupid! I was here first. - And you're gonna stay here.

Why me? Why always me?

Let's go, Sugar.

You're gonna stay here, too, bubby.

Come to your daddy.

I'm gonna take you to my bubby house.

There you go, baby.

I think I'm gonna need some help.

- Anything new with Bonehead? - Nothing, and I'm worried about him.

It's you two I'm worried about.

Steve's still wigged about Frankie.

Well, why don't you take us up?

I already suggested that to Steve. No go.

- Oh, what can he do? - There's a lot he can do.

Hey, here they come!

Frankie, I'm worried.

Do you think Bonnie might have been right?

My girl's worried. Any reason she should be?

No reason at all. Or for you, either.

First one down's a rotten skydiver.

Look at that! Too much.

Oh, out of sight!

We gotta try it.

- Open! Open those chutes! - What's the matter?

At the speed they're falling, that water's like concrete.

That's groovy.

Not so groovy. They opened too late.

Come on! Let's go! Come on!

Lorelei.

Lorelei!

Hey, Frankie, skydiving's groovy, but let's stick to surfing.

Yeah.

You know something?

A kiss is worth more than a thousand words.

Then why don't you stop talking?

- All right, where is she? - Where's who?

You know very well who.

I mean, I brought Earl here because you said...

Frankie, I found Sugar. They've got her at that pool hall.

- Who's got her? - Von Zipper's got her.

Von Zipper?

The Rat Pack social director. And you promised me...

And I'm gonna keep my promise. Okay, you guys, let's go!

Cowabunga!

- "Cowabunga?" - I don't know, Earl, but let's go.

- You know, I've been thinking. - Watch it, boss.

Where is my idol and South Dakota Slim and my two mice, Puss 'n' Boots?

First you win the game for me, boss,

and then when you're nice and relaxed, I'll tell you.

Oh, okay.

Watch this.

There they are. Let's rack them up!

Wait a minute! Wait a minute! What are we fighting about?

You've got Sugar! Where is she?

- I ain't got Sugar. Where is she? - I was gonna tell you, boss.

I got a hunch South Dakota Slim took her to his bubby house.

- You mean the old sawmill? - Yeah.

Sawmill? Why, it's right out of The Perils of Pauline.

It's Pearl White revisited.

We'll see you later.

Follow me. Whistle, whistle.

That's Earl, brother.

Yeah, Earl, while there's still a door.

- Whistle. - Get them, guys!

Why me? Why me all the time?

Tasty.

Now the show starts, bubbies.

Fine. Fine! Fine!

You know, the name of this game is murder, bubbies.

Oh, fine. This is gonna be good.

I seen this in my favorite picture, The Perils of Pauline.

I don't think this is very nice.

No, I think it's kind of mean.

Hold it! No one can criticize old Slim.

I'll show you old Slim hasn't got a mean bone in his body.

I'm gonna apply the anesthesia to you, darling.

I've got hasenpfeffer. I've got a little bit of...

There she is.

This anesthesia works every time, bubby.

Come on, Sugar, let's go!

Yeah, we may be rotten, Sug, but we're not this rotten.

It works every time.

What are you doing with my bubby there?

Step aside, ladies. That's my Sugar, bubbies.

- You give me back my idol! Right? - Right!

- Bull's-eye. - Hey, boss!

Come on!

Sugar, your daddy's gonna take you to his new lab!

Come on, my little bauble.

- Come here! - Boss?

Nobody takes my Sugar!

Now you've got yours, bubby!

Why, you...

I'm the king bubby around here! Come right up and get me!

Where's my little Sugar?

You watch your daddy operate now, Sugar.

Come on, bubbies! Hey, bubby!

Here's your daddy!

Come here! Come on, now! Come on, man!

Why me? Why me all the time?

I'm gonna give you a little entertainment. Yeah!

Sugar.

- You all right? - My hero!

I do all the work and he gets all the credit.

Well, that's life.

Why are you hitting? Stop hitting me! Will you let go? You stupids!

Okay, let's go.

What a story.

Surfer saves singer. Singer saves surfer.

Surfer saves...

I'll let Earl string these pearls.

Bonehead,

about that mermaid...

I was kidding. There never was any mermaid.

The girl who pulled me in this afternoon, she asked me to give you this.

Oh, here comes Boney.

- Hi, Sugar. - Hi.

This is so romantic, Bonehead.

It's like we were brought together by some mystery of the sea.

I knew he was stupid, but sickening, too?

Was there really a mermaid?

Is there a moon? Is there a sky?

Are there dreams?

Subtitles: Kilo