subtitlecat.com

All language subtitles for Amateur.Night.2016.720p.WEBRip.x264-[YTS.LT]-eng

Afrikaans

Albanian

Amharic

Arabic

Armenian

Azerbaijani

Basque

Belarusian

Bengali

Bosnian

Bulgarian

Catalan

Cebuano

Chichewa

Chinese (Simplified)

Chinese (Traditional)

Corsican

Croatian

Czech

Danish

Dutch

English Download

Esperanto

Estonian

Filipino

Finnish

French

Frisian

Galician

Georgian

German

Greek

Gujarati

Haitian Creole

Hausa

Hawaiian

Hebrew Download

Hindi

Hmong

Hungarian

Icelandic

Igbo

Indonesian

Irish

Italian

Japanese

Javanese

Kannada

Kazakh

Khmer

Korean

Kurdish (Kurmanji)

Kyrgyz

Lao

Latin

Latvian

Lithuanian

Luxembourgish

Macedonian

Malagasy

Malay

Malayalam

Maltese

Maori

Marathi

Mongolian

Myanmar (Burmese)

Nepali

Norwegian

Pashto

Persian

Polish

Portuguese Download

Punjabi

Romanian

Russian

Samoan

Scots Gaelic

Serbian

Sesotho

Shona

Sindhi

Sinhala Download

Slovak

Slovenian

Somali

Spanish

Sundanese

Swahili

Swedish

Tajik

Tamil

Telugu

Thai

Turkish

Ukrainian

Urdu

Uzbek

Vietnamese

Welsh

Xhosa

Yiddish

Yoruba

Zulu

Odia (Oriya)

Kinyarwanda

Turkmen

Tatar

Uyghur

Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074 Advertise your product or brand here contact www.OpenSubtitles.org today 2 00:00:29,475 --> 00:00:41,475 Fixed & Synced by bozxphd. Enjoy The Flick 3 00:00:42,475 --> 00:00:46,712 (PHONE DIALS) 4 00:00:49,450 --> 00:00:54,118 (PHONE RINGING) 5 00:00:54,121 --> 00:00:55,853 (ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS) 6 00:00:55,856 --> 00:00:58,957 Hey, it's Guy Carter. 7 00:00:58,959 --> 00:01:02,293 I just... I just wanted to touch base 8 00:01:04,031 --> 00:01:06,331 and let you know that it was... 9 00:01:06,332 --> 00:01:08,966 it was amazing meeting you last week. 10 00:01:08,968 --> 00:01:13,405 I felt really good about it and umm... 11 00:01:13,406 --> 00:01:16,174 I hope you did too. 12 00:01:16,176 --> 00:01:17,975 So... 13 00:01:17,978 --> 00:01:21,379 I look forward to talking to you soon. 14 00:01:21,382 --> 00:01:24,515 Okay, bye. 15 00:01:27,987 --> 00:01:30,588 (PHONE RINGING) 16 00:01:30,591 --> 00:01:31,989 (ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS) 17 00:01:31,992 --> 00:01:35,259 Hey there, it's Guy Carter again. 18 00:01:35,262 --> 00:01:37,662 Just wondering if there's any news. 19 00:01:37,664 --> 00:01:41,033 You said I'd hear by Monday at the latest and... 20 00:01:41,034 --> 00:01:43,168 it's now Friday. 21 00:01:43,170 --> 00:01:46,170 (BEEP) I don't mean to keep bugging you, 22 00:01:46,173 --> 00:01:49,740 but you basically said I had the job. (BEEP) 23 00:01:49,742 --> 00:01:53,478 Hey, hi, I just... I was thinking, 24 00:01:53,480 --> 00:01:57,248 if it's easier for you to text or to e-mail, 25 00:01:57,251 --> 00:01:59,151 that's totally cool. (BEEP) 26 00:01:59,152 --> 00:02:02,987 Hey, it's Guy Carter. It's Guy Carter, again. 27 00:02:02,989 --> 00:02:04,989 (BEEP) Oh, it's Guy Carter. 28 00:02:04,992 --> 00:02:07,793 I don't want you to lose out on getting me. 29 00:02:07,795 --> 00:02:11,629 I'm still at the same number. (BEEP) 30 00:02:11,632 --> 00:02:14,967 (FEMALE VOICE ON PHONE) Recording has been paused due to silence. 31 00:02:14,968 --> 00:02:17,201 Guy: Okay, now I'm pissed. 32 00:02:17,204 --> 00:02:19,837 How do you not call someone back 33 00:02:19,840 --> 00:02:21,073 who interviewed three times 34 00:02:21,074 --> 00:02:23,207 and who you said was a shoe-in? 35 00:02:23,210 --> 00:02:25,176 How do you not hire someone 36 00:02:25,179 --> 00:02:27,179 who you said had the best book you'd ever seen? 37 00:02:27,181 --> 00:02:28,813 I deserve this job. 38 00:02:28,816 --> 00:02:33,651 (BEEP) I can only assume the reason you're not calling me back 39 00:02:33,653 --> 00:02:35,888 is because you're too busy... 40 00:02:35,889 --> 00:02:38,223 chomping on huge dicks. 41 00:02:38,224 --> 00:02:41,325 It's just a big dick breakfast over there. 42 00:02:41,328 --> 00:02:43,961 Dick omelets and dick pancakes. 43 00:02:43,963 --> 00:02:45,697 Scrambled dick. Dick Benedict. 44 00:02:45,699 --> 00:02:49,001 All you can eat dick. Would you like another mimosa with your dick? 45 00:02:49,002 --> 00:02:50,235 There's a dick carving station. 46 00:02:50,236 --> 00:02:52,704 You're just grabbing as much dick. 47 00:02:52,706 --> 00:02:54,906 Oh no, that's okay, I'm fine with my dick. 48 00:02:54,908 --> 00:02:57,241 Your plate is filled with dick 49 00:02:57,243 --> 00:02:59,545 and then your mouth is filled. 50 00:02:59,546 --> 00:03:01,445 (GAGGING) 51 00:03:01,448 --> 00:03:03,514 In fact, it's so full of dick, 52 00:03:03,516 --> 00:03:06,951 that I can't pick up the phone and make a simple... 53 00:03:06,954 --> 00:03:09,153 Man on the phone: Guy. Rob Veckmann. 54 00:03:09,156 --> 00:03:10,855 The reason I didn't call you 55 00:03:10,858 --> 00:03:13,358 is because my wife's been plowing my business partner. 56 00:03:13,360 --> 00:03:16,562 They took over the company and fired me. 57 00:03:16,563 --> 00:03:18,462 Oh, man. 58 00:03:18,465 --> 00:03:23,201 Oh, that's... Wow! I had no idea. 59 00:03:23,204 --> 00:03:27,538 ROB: Yeah, there's a lot you don't know. Dick. 60 00:03:27,540 --> 00:03:30,841 Rob? Rob? 61 00:03:35,915 --> 00:03:37,949 (SIGHS) 62 00:03:45,125 --> 00:03:47,658 ANNE: You alright in here, chief? 63 00:03:48,996 --> 00:03:50,996 How long have you been standing there? 64 00:03:50,997 --> 00:03:53,365 Long enough to hear the dick buffet. 65 00:03:55,703 --> 00:03:58,002 Guy... 66 00:03:58,004 --> 00:03:59,837 you're making yourself crazy. 67 00:04:04,344 --> 00:04:06,877 How's the crib coming along? 68 00:04:08,314 --> 00:04:11,282 It's getting there. 69 00:04:11,284 --> 00:04:13,318 You know, not assembling that thing 70 00:04:13,319 --> 00:04:16,254 isn't gonna stop her from coming out of me. 71 00:04:16,257 --> 00:04:18,624 Why would I want to stop her? 72 00:04:18,625 --> 00:04:22,927 Although, I mean, I guess I wouldn't be totally upset 73 00:04:22,930 --> 00:04:25,329 if she held off another eight months. 74 00:04:25,331 --> 00:04:28,300 That's funny. I was thinking if she came sooner, 75 00:04:28,302 --> 00:04:30,535 like say, before Tuesday, 76 00:04:30,536 --> 00:04:33,038 we'd still have health insurance to cover it. 77 00:04:37,110 --> 00:04:38,543 What is that supposed to mean? 78 00:04:38,545 --> 00:04:40,112 Umm... 79 00:04:40,113 --> 00:04:42,514 Well, pretty much what it sounds like. 80 00:04:42,516 --> 00:04:44,615 Wait? Are you... You're serious. 81 00:04:44,617 --> 00:04:47,552 Anne? How are you just telling me this now? 82 00:04:47,553 --> 00:04:49,353 I don't... You were so stressed out 83 00:04:49,355 --> 00:04:51,456 I didn't wanna make it worse. 84 00:04:51,457 --> 00:04:53,992 It looked like the Resource thing was happening, 85 00:04:53,994 --> 00:04:55,427 so I didn't mention it. 86 00:04:55,428 --> 00:04:58,362 But now, I'm mentioning it. 87 00:04:58,365 --> 00:05:02,134 They have to give you some sort of grace period, right? 88 00:05:02,136 --> 00:05:05,002 They did. It ends Tuesday. 89 00:05:07,841 --> 00:05:10,309 I mean, I assumed you'd be working by now. 90 00:05:10,310 --> 00:05:13,444 Yeah. Well, we dropped the ball on that one. 91 00:05:13,447 --> 00:05:16,213 I'm sorry, "we"? Meaning me? 92 00:05:16,216 --> 00:05:17,749 You quit your job. 93 00:05:17,750 --> 00:05:20,418 Because we got pregnant. 94 00:05:23,189 --> 00:05:25,356 I can't talk about this right now. 95 00:05:25,358 --> 00:05:27,692 I'm gonna make tea. 96 00:05:29,495 --> 00:05:31,028 Anne... 97 00:05:36,437 --> 00:05:40,471 ("TO BE LOVED" BY THE PENTAGONS PLAYING) 98 00:05:51,718 --> 00:05:55,721 ♪ To be loved ♪ 99 00:05:56,889 --> 00:05:59,024 ♪ And to be loved ♪ 100 00:05:59,026 --> 00:06:02,793 ♪ Forever ♪ 101 00:06:03,963 --> 00:06:05,997 ♪ Let's make a vow ♪ 102 00:06:05,999 --> 00:06:10,201 ♪ To never ♪ 103 00:06:10,204 --> 00:06:14,572 ♪ Ever part ♪ 104 00:06:14,574 --> 00:06:17,608 ANNE: Here. 105 00:06:17,610 --> 00:06:18,610 What is this? 106 00:06:18,612 --> 00:06:20,312 ANNE: I found it on Craigslist. 107 00:06:20,314 --> 00:06:22,680 It's the only thing remotely realistic. 108 00:06:22,682 --> 00:06:24,149 Now If you studied dental hygiene, 109 00:06:24,151 --> 00:06:27,451 that would really open up our options. 110 00:06:32,192 --> 00:06:34,024 You want me to be a delivery guy? 111 00:06:34,026 --> 00:06:37,396 I want you to be anything if it pays the insurance by Tuesday. 112 00:06:37,398 --> 00:06:39,598 That will buy us another month, 113 00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:41,266 unless of course you want me to call my parents 114 00:06:41,268 --> 00:06:42,933 and ask for more money again. 115 00:06:42,935 --> 00:06:44,369 It is an option. 116 00:06:44,370 --> 00:06:47,471 No. No, it is not an option, Anne. 117 00:06:47,473 --> 00:06:49,374 I don't wanna go into labor and find out the "repo man" 118 00:06:49,375 --> 00:06:50,742 towed my car out of the driveway. 119 00:06:50,744 --> 00:06:53,077 There's no such thing as the "repo man." 120 00:06:53,079 --> 00:06:54,678 Of course there is. 121 00:06:54,680 --> 00:06:56,715 Have you ever seen a repo man... 122 00:06:56,716 --> 00:06:58,716 not counting the Emilio Estevez movie? 123 00:06:58,718 --> 00:07:03,154 Guy, I'm not gonna argue the existence of repo men 124 00:07:03,156 --> 00:07:04,288 because they're real. 125 00:07:04,290 --> 00:07:06,257 What do they come with, a tow truck 126 00:07:06,259 --> 00:07:08,059 or a fleet of unicorns? 127 00:07:08,060 --> 00:07:09,528 My half-brother's mom Sandy, 128 00:07:09,529 --> 00:07:11,396 said that she had her car taken 129 00:07:11,398 --> 00:07:13,365 and I believe it was by a repo man, okay? 130 00:07:13,367 --> 00:07:17,334 What? They are not... I might throw up on you. 131 00:07:17,336 --> 00:07:18,870 GUY: You're not gonna throw up on me. 132 00:07:18,872 --> 00:07:20,504 A little bit. 133 00:07:20,507 --> 00:07:24,843 Why don't you go lie down and I'll bring you something? Okay? 134 00:07:24,845 --> 00:07:26,928 (GROANING) 135 00:07:26,930 --> 00:07:29,014 Go! Go lay down, I'll bring you something. 136 00:07:31,218 --> 00:07:33,084 ANNE: They're real. 137 00:07:37,257 --> 00:07:39,858 (DOOR CREAKS) GUY: Here you go. 138 00:07:39,860 --> 00:07:41,959 For your tummy. 139 00:07:52,139 --> 00:07:55,307 Sorry for being such a baby. 140 00:07:55,308 --> 00:07:57,742 I know you're frustrated. 141 00:07:59,012 --> 00:08:00,946 (EXHALES) 142 00:08:00,947 --> 00:08:02,613 It's just so stupid. 143 00:08:02,615 --> 00:08:05,449 I'm supposed to have my ducks in a row by now. 144 00:08:05,451 --> 00:08:08,887 Maybe it's okay to not have your ducks in a row. 145 00:08:08,889 --> 00:08:11,956 It's not okay. Ducks have to be in a row. 146 00:08:11,959 --> 00:08:16,694 Have you ever seen ducks? They're sorta crazy. 147 00:08:16,697 --> 00:08:21,632 They like to run around, do shit. 148 00:08:21,634 --> 00:08:25,603 No, I don't... Not my ducks. 149 00:08:25,605 --> 00:08:28,606 My ducks are different than your ducks. 150 00:08:28,608 --> 00:08:30,475 Mine are not running around and crazy. 151 00:08:30,476 --> 00:08:32,744 They have an objective, they have a plan. 152 00:08:32,745 --> 00:08:34,578 They wanna get somewhere in life. 153 00:08:34,581 --> 00:08:37,081 Then they're like walking in a line, 154 00:08:37,084 --> 00:08:39,384 otherwise known as a row. 155 00:08:39,385 --> 00:08:41,352 Honey, oww. 156 00:08:41,355 --> 00:08:43,421 Then call the number. 157 00:08:43,423 --> 00:08:45,123 (EXHALES) 158 00:08:50,129 --> 00:08:53,831 (PHONE RINGING) 159 00:08:53,834 --> 00:08:54,832 Man: Word up? 160 00:08:54,835 --> 00:08:56,500 Oh. Hey. Um... 161 00:08:56,503 --> 00:08:59,270 I'm calling about your ad. 162 00:08:59,273 --> 00:09:00,672 Man: You got a car? 163 00:09:00,673 --> 00:09:03,707 GUY: Yes. MAN: Does it run? 164 00:09:03,710 --> 00:09:06,977 YES. MAN: Meet me at Fat Burger in West Hollywood. 165 00:09:06,980 --> 00:09:09,548 Umm... okay. 166 00:09:09,549 --> 00:09:11,549 Oh, a question... 167 00:09:11,552 --> 00:09:13,284 This may be a little premature, 168 00:09:13,287 --> 00:09:15,486 but are there benefits? 169 00:09:15,489 --> 00:09:17,788 MAN: Plenty. (CHUCKLES) 170 00:09:17,791 --> 00:09:22,192 P, L, E, N, T, Y, my man. 171 00:09:55,328 --> 00:09:57,162 (DOORBELL RINGS) 172 00:09:58,432 --> 00:10:01,099 (MAN LAUGHS) My bad. 173 00:10:04,671 --> 00:10:07,806 Yeah. Um-hm. What he do? 174 00:10:12,379 --> 00:10:16,380 Scraping the guardrail doesn't necessarily mean he was wasted. 175 00:10:16,383 --> 00:10:19,717 Oh. You got me there. 176 00:10:19,720 --> 00:10:22,754 Okay, yeah, no. I'll tell him, 177 00:10:22,755 --> 00:10:25,789 "No more shootin' up in the car." 178 00:10:25,792 --> 00:10:29,693 But, fret not, I got a buddy that will drive you. 179 00:10:29,696 --> 00:10:33,431 Um-hm. About six foot. 180 00:10:33,432 --> 00:10:36,533 Serious, clean. Like a cop. 181 00:10:36,536 --> 00:10:39,937 No, he's not a real cop. 182 00:10:39,940 --> 00:10:42,573 I can promise you he will not hit on you. 183 00:10:42,576 --> 00:10:46,644 How do I know? 'Cause he's gay. 184 00:10:48,414 --> 00:10:50,014 Gay as fuck. 185 00:10:50,017 --> 00:10:52,049 Real gay. 186 00:10:52,052 --> 00:10:54,385 No, he got a sweet ride. 187 00:10:54,388 --> 00:10:56,488 A Volvo. 188 00:10:56,490 --> 00:10:58,255 Yeah, yeah. 189 00:10:58,258 --> 00:11:01,292 Don't get pissy with me. I'm trying to hook you up. 190 00:11:01,293 --> 00:11:03,461 Sit. 191 00:11:03,462 --> 00:11:05,462 Okay, bye. 192 00:11:05,465 --> 00:11:07,831 You O negative? 193 00:11:07,833 --> 00:11:09,299 No, I'm... 194 00:11:09,302 --> 00:11:12,370 I'm not talking to you. Uh-huh. 195 00:11:12,371 --> 00:11:14,072 Right. Are you O negative? 196 00:11:14,073 --> 00:11:16,908 No, I'm... I'm not talkin' to you. Hold up. 197 00:11:16,909 --> 00:11:20,077 All right, I love you too. Bye. 198 00:11:20,080 --> 00:11:21,479 You the one just called? 199 00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:24,315 Yeah, I'm Guy. 200 00:11:26,119 --> 00:11:29,086 I'm Zoley. Congratulations. You're hired. 201 00:11:30,691 --> 00:11:35,025 Okay... Well, what am I gonna be driving? 202 00:11:35,796 --> 00:11:38,062 Pizzas? Dry cleaning? What? 203 00:11:38,065 --> 00:11:42,267 Girls. The first one's named Nikki. 204 00:11:42,269 --> 00:11:43,434 Huh. 205 00:11:44,870 --> 00:11:47,538 You didn't mention that in your ad. 206 00:11:47,540 --> 00:11:49,606 It's all above board, man. 207 00:11:49,609 --> 00:11:51,375 You're not doin' anything illegal, 208 00:11:51,378 --> 00:11:52,376 you're just drivin' a car. 209 00:11:52,379 --> 00:11:55,480 Pickin' up, droppin' off. 210 00:11:55,481 --> 00:11:57,481 Easy as cake. 211 00:11:59,519 --> 00:12:01,485 What are the benefits? 212 00:12:02,655 --> 00:12:04,389 Well, you play your cards right, 213 00:12:04,390 --> 00:12:05,889 there can be all kinds of benefits. 214 00:12:05,892 --> 00:12:09,193 Know what I'm sayin'? (CHUCKLES) 215 00:12:13,133 --> 00:12:14,966 Guy, you about this life, or what? 216 00:12:14,967 --> 00:12:19,169 No, no no no... I'm... Yes... I'm... 217 00:12:19,172 --> 00:12:20,638 I'm about this life. 218 00:12:20,639 --> 00:12:23,707 Okay, all right. Mm-hmm. Okay, sweet. 219 00:12:23,710 --> 00:12:26,577 Here's where she's at. 220 00:12:26,580 --> 00:12:28,879 Oh, whoa. Now? You want me to start now? 221 00:12:28,881 --> 00:12:32,317 Right now, yes. Nikki is waitin'. 222 00:12:32,318 --> 00:12:34,753 And Nikki do not like to wait. 223 00:13:11,057 --> 00:13:13,691 Hi. I'm Guy. 224 00:13:13,692 --> 00:13:16,594 Guy, with the sweet ride, Guy? 225 00:13:16,596 --> 00:13:19,596 That'd be me. 226 00:13:19,599 --> 00:13:22,600 Call me Nikki, Nikki Winters. 227 00:13:22,601 --> 00:13:24,969 And next time, don't be late. 228 00:13:29,643 --> 00:13:32,442 (GROANS) 229 00:13:37,317 --> 00:13:40,384 So where are we going? 230 00:13:40,386 --> 00:13:42,320 Bel-Air. 231 00:13:50,730 --> 00:13:54,164 FEMALE VOICE ON GPS: Please proceed to the highlighted route. 232 00:13:54,167 --> 00:13:56,234 Want music? 233 00:13:56,235 --> 00:13:58,570 Smooth jazz is good. 234 00:13:58,572 --> 00:14:00,871 Not what I would've guessed. 235 00:14:00,874 --> 00:14:02,740 Nikki: My life's hectic enough. 236 00:14:02,741 --> 00:14:04,708 I don't need my music to be. 237 00:14:04,711 --> 00:14:07,879 (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) 238 00:14:10,850 --> 00:14:14,118 (CAR HORN BEEPS) 239 00:14:14,120 --> 00:14:16,321 You realize, we're still late. 240 00:14:16,322 --> 00:14:19,857 Yeah... I got a ticket going through a yellow. 241 00:14:19,860 --> 00:14:22,594 So now I just stop. 242 00:14:32,938 --> 00:14:36,039 So about this client, I've been with him before. 243 00:14:36,042 --> 00:14:37,875 He's a doctor. Pretty basic. 244 00:14:37,878 --> 00:14:39,177 Just walk me to the door, 245 00:14:39,178 --> 00:14:41,613 and let him know you'll be outside in the car. 246 00:14:41,615 --> 00:14:44,982 I thought the job was just dropping off and picking up? 247 00:14:44,985 --> 00:14:46,717 "The job" is being my driver. 248 00:14:46,720 --> 00:14:49,586 That's a ride and protection. 249 00:14:49,588 --> 00:14:51,822 You carry a weapon? 250 00:14:51,825 --> 00:14:55,592 Me? A weapon? No, I do not carry a weapon. 251 00:14:55,595 --> 00:14:56,995 What about karate? You know karate? 252 00:14:56,996 --> 00:15:00,163 I have zero skills in the lethal arts. 253 00:15:00,166 --> 00:15:03,067 I'm an architect. I know how to draw. 254 00:15:03,068 --> 00:15:06,303 Never mind, I got my own protection right here. 255 00:15:07,908 --> 00:15:12,509 Great. I'll let you handle that part of the operation. 256 00:15:12,511 --> 00:15:14,177 And what about you? 257 00:15:14,179 --> 00:15:18,081 How did you get into this line of work? 258 00:15:19,653 --> 00:15:22,153 Well, it's not exactly an everyday job. 259 00:15:22,154 --> 00:15:24,822 Well, that depends where you spend every day. 260 00:15:24,823 --> 00:15:26,157 I grew up in the Valley. 261 00:15:26,158 --> 00:15:27,859 Every girl I know did a porno 262 00:15:27,860 --> 00:15:28,960 by the time she was eighteen. 263 00:15:28,961 --> 00:15:30,695 Or at least a stripping gig. 264 00:15:30,697 --> 00:15:32,263 But you're still doing it. 265 00:15:32,264 --> 00:15:33,998 NIKKI: Yeah, 'cause I'm good at it. 266 00:15:34,000 --> 00:15:35,866 I don't get what the big deal is. 267 00:15:35,869 --> 00:15:39,336 Nobody asks a carpenter why they became a carpenter. 268 00:15:41,707 --> 00:15:43,307 Fair enough. 269 00:16:13,572 --> 00:16:15,139 (KNOCKING) 270 00:16:23,950 --> 00:16:25,783 Hello, stranger. 271 00:16:25,784 --> 00:16:28,019 It's been too long. 272 00:16:28,020 --> 00:16:31,288 My driver. Great house. 273 00:16:31,291 --> 00:16:32,456 Paul Williams? 274 00:16:32,459 --> 00:16:34,125 Paul Williams, right? 275 00:16:34,126 --> 00:16:37,361 He's a pioneer of the California Regency Movement. 276 00:16:37,364 --> 00:16:39,197 Really great designer. 277 00:16:39,198 --> 00:16:40,898 Designed a lot in the fifties, 278 00:16:40,899 --> 00:16:42,366 which is when it looks this house is from. 279 00:16:42,369 --> 00:16:44,134 He's black, incidentally, which doesn't really... 280 00:16:44,136 --> 00:16:47,404 I'm sorry. Do I care about anything you're saying right now? 281 00:16:47,407 --> 00:16:49,106 Nikki: No, you don't. 282 00:16:49,109 --> 00:16:51,241 Don't you have somewhere to go? 283 00:16:51,244 --> 00:16:52,777 Yes. He does. 284 00:16:52,778 --> 00:16:54,278 He'll be in the car. Right, Guy? 285 00:16:54,279 --> 00:16:57,849 Right, of course. I'll be in the car. 286 00:16:57,850 --> 00:17:00,585 Nikki: See you in an hour. 287 00:17:07,394 --> 00:17:11,128 (MUSIC PLAYING) 288 00:17:17,737 --> 00:17:22,640 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 289 00:17:26,846 --> 00:17:29,113 Fuck this. 290 00:17:37,624 --> 00:17:39,523 (PHONE RINGING) 291 00:17:39,526 --> 00:17:41,425 Anne: Baby? 292 00:17:41,427 --> 00:17:42,993 So guess what? 293 00:17:42,996 --> 00:17:44,662 I'm not driving pizzas. 294 00:17:44,663 --> 00:17:46,197 What are you driving? 295 00:17:46,199 --> 00:17:48,665 GUY: Hookers. ANNE: Shut up. 296 00:17:48,667 --> 00:17:50,201 I'm serious. 297 00:17:50,202 --> 00:17:52,670 I picked up this lady called Nikki Winters. 298 00:17:52,672 --> 00:17:55,239 You're fibbing me. I fib you not. 299 00:17:55,240 --> 00:17:57,275 You know that's not her real name, right? 300 00:17:57,277 --> 00:18:00,310 No way. Oh my, God. What was she like? 301 00:18:00,313 --> 00:18:02,712 Was she hot? Did she have an amazing body? 302 00:18:02,714 --> 00:18:05,316 Did she look like Julia Roberts in "Pretty Woman"? 303 00:18:05,317 --> 00:18:08,385 No. This was not a happy hooker. 304 00:18:08,387 --> 00:18:10,054 This lady was mean. 305 00:18:10,056 --> 00:18:12,856 Mean? Can you blame her? 306 00:18:12,858 --> 00:18:16,027 I guess not. So where is she now? 307 00:18:16,028 --> 00:18:17,862 At some doctor's house. 308 00:18:17,864 --> 00:18:20,498 And you're just like sitting out in the driveway or something? 309 00:18:20,500 --> 00:18:22,099 No, I left. 310 00:18:22,102 --> 00:18:23,601 What do you mean you left? 311 00:18:23,603 --> 00:18:25,936 You just ditched her? 312 00:18:25,939 --> 00:18:28,472 Babe, this guy, he totally insulted me. 313 00:18:28,474 --> 00:18:30,307 I told him his house was a Paul Williams, 314 00:18:30,309 --> 00:18:32,477 and he looked at me like I was an idiot. 315 00:18:32,479 --> 00:18:35,212 I mean, hello, I have a master's in architecture from Yale, 316 00:18:35,214 --> 00:18:36,980 I think I know what I'm talking about. 317 00:18:36,982 --> 00:18:39,916 Guy, what if something happens to her? 318 00:18:39,919 --> 00:18:43,320 Like what? I don't know, was he creepy? 319 00:18:43,323 --> 00:18:46,557 He hired a hooker to come to his mansion in the daytime. 320 00:18:46,558 --> 00:18:47,825 Of course he was creepy. 321 00:18:47,826 --> 00:18:49,259 Plus, he's like a doctor. 322 00:18:49,261 --> 00:18:51,962 They're the worst kind of psychos. 323 00:18:51,964 --> 00:18:54,464 He's her regular. I'm sure it's fine. 324 00:18:54,467 --> 00:18:57,434 You don't know that. You have to go back. 325 00:18:57,436 --> 00:19:00,837 Anne, you're crazy talking. I'm almost home. 326 00:19:00,839 --> 00:19:03,540 If something happens, you'll never forgive yourself! 327 00:19:03,542 --> 00:19:08,746 Go back now! This is someone's daughter we're talking about. 328 00:19:21,861 --> 00:19:23,827 Oh! Sorry. 329 00:19:24,963 --> 00:19:27,230 (CAR HORN HONKS) Okay, I see you. 330 00:19:27,232 --> 00:19:29,901 I got... All right! One sec. 331 00:19:29,903 --> 00:19:33,003 I just gotta U-turn. 332 00:19:33,006 --> 00:19:35,539 Man in car: Man, move it! 333 00:19:35,541 --> 00:19:37,441 Man in car: Jesus! 334 00:20:14,547 --> 00:20:17,013 (PHONE RINGS) 335 00:20:17,016 --> 00:20:18,749 Word up? 336 00:20:18,750 --> 00:20:20,951 Hey, it's Guy. 337 00:20:20,953 --> 00:20:22,118 Yeah, you with Nikki? 338 00:20:22,121 --> 00:20:23,621 She's in a house with a client. 339 00:20:23,623 --> 00:20:25,990 Said she'd be out twenty minutes ago, 340 00:20:25,991 --> 00:20:26,990 but she's not. 341 00:20:26,992 --> 00:20:29,059 Nikki's never late. 342 00:20:29,061 --> 00:20:31,729 Hold on, I'll try her cell. 343 00:20:35,934 --> 00:20:38,568 Zoley: She's not pickin' up. 344 00:20:38,570 --> 00:20:41,038 Damn, that's all I need is another Nikki problem. 345 00:20:41,039 --> 00:20:42,973 She's, like, fifty percent of my business. 346 00:20:42,976 --> 00:20:44,541 I lose her, then I'm out on the street. 347 00:20:44,544 --> 00:20:47,111 Spoken like a true pimp. Spoken like a true white boy. 348 00:20:47,113 --> 00:20:48,913 There are no more pimps. 349 00:20:48,914 --> 00:20:51,182 Pimps got killed by Craigslist. 350 00:20:51,183 --> 00:20:52,717 I'm a dispatcher. 351 00:20:52,719 --> 00:20:55,086 I work for Nikki, not the other way around. 352 00:20:55,087 --> 00:20:57,654 She needs a ride, she calls me. 353 00:20:57,656 --> 00:21:00,258 If you screw this up, then she's not gonna call me. 354 00:21:00,259 --> 00:21:03,827 Okay, so what do I do? ZOLEY: Lemme think. Lemme think. 355 00:21:03,829 --> 00:21:05,363 You got a gun? GUY: What? No. 356 00:21:05,365 --> 00:21:07,365 Why does everyone keep asking if I have a gun? 357 00:21:07,366 --> 00:21:10,634 Calm down, it's an honest question. 358 00:21:10,636 --> 00:21:12,970 You know karate? I am an architect! 359 00:21:12,971 --> 00:21:14,538 ZOLEY: Architects can know karate. 360 00:21:14,539 --> 00:21:16,941 Well, I don't! 361 00:21:16,942 --> 00:21:18,576 You gonna have to go in, man. 362 00:21:18,577 --> 00:21:21,545 Pretend you're not wearing a pink shirt and go in! 363 00:21:30,722 --> 00:21:35,558 (MUSIC PLAYS) 364 00:21:35,560 --> 00:21:36,993 (GRUNTS) 365 00:21:36,996 --> 00:21:38,561 (GRUNTS) 366 00:21:43,568 --> 00:21:44,934 (GRUNTS) 367 00:22:03,088 --> 00:22:04,821 (SPRAYS) 368 00:22:04,824 --> 00:22:06,624 (COUGHING) 369 00:22:25,478 --> 00:22:27,611 (GRUNTS) 370 00:22:40,926 --> 00:22:42,593 Shit! 371 00:22:46,065 --> 00:22:49,700 (DOOR CREAKS) 372 00:22:59,444 --> 00:23:02,480 Doctor: That's right. 373 00:23:02,481 --> 00:23:05,648 Go ahead, struggle all you want. 374 00:23:07,252 --> 00:23:11,654 (NIKKI GRUNTING) 375 00:23:11,656 --> 00:23:13,324 You're not getting out of this. 376 00:23:13,326 --> 00:23:15,558 You're never getting out of this. 377 00:23:16,929 --> 00:23:20,998 Helpless right now, huh? Pretty vulnerable. 378 00:23:21,000 --> 00:23:22,967 (DOCTOR GRUNTING) Ah, there we go. 379 00:23:24,804 --> 00:23:26,269 That's too tight. 380 00:23:26,271 --> 00:23:28,538 Nikki: Hmm-mm. 381 00:23:30,308 --> 00:23:32,076 Hmm-mm. 382 00:23:32,077 --> 00:23:33,778 Huh? 383 00:23:33,779 --> 00:23:36,212 (SCREAMING) 384 00:23:36,214 --> 00:23:37,981 (GROANING) 385 00:23:37,983 --> 00:23:40,049 Guy: Oh shit! Oh, Oh! 386 00:23:40,051 --> 00:23:41,652 Shit, shit, shit, shit. 387 00:23:41,653 --> 00:23:43,319 Okay. Here we go. Here we go. 388 00:23:43,322 --> 00:23:44,622 I'm here. I'm here. I'm sorry. 389 00:23:44,624 --> 00:23:47,191 What the fuck is wrong with you? 390 00:23:47,192 --> 00:23:49,626 What do you mean? He was torturing you. 391 00:23:49,628 --> 00:23:52,262 That was role play, you dumbass. What? 392 00:23:52,265 --> 00:23:55,365 I was teaching him how to tie bondage knots. 393 00:23:55,367 --> 00:23:58,469 He pays extra if I let him wear the dog mask. 394 00:23:58,471 --> 00:24:01,838 Or at least, he was gonna. Just untie me, okay? 395 00:24:01,840 --> 00:24:03,473 Uh... Jesus. How? 396 00:24:03,476 --> 00:24:05,509 How do you... Oh, my God! 397 00:24:05,510 --> 00:24:07,411 Is this guy a fucking Eagle Scout? 398 00:24:07,413 --> 00:24:09,579 Hold on. I took sailing camp one summer 399 00:24:09,582 --> 00:24:11,682 and I think this is a... What do you call this knot? 400 00:24:11,683 --> 00:24:13,416 Are you fucking kidding me? Sorry. 401 00:24:13,419 --> 00:24:14,684 Let me, okay, hold on. 402 00:24:14,686 --> 00:24:16,720 It's like a spaghetti factory. 403 00:24:16,721 --> 00:24:18,189 I don't even know where to begin. 404 00:24:18,191 --> 00:24:20,124 Under. Under what? 405 00:24:20,125 --> 00:24:21,791 Under, over. Under. 406 00:24:21,794 --> 00:24:23,326 Under, over, yeah. 407 00:24:23,328 --> 00:24:24,595 Pretty simple. Yeah. 408 00:24:24,596 --> 00:24:26,262 I think I got it, I think I got it! 409 00:24:26,265 --> 00:24:27,664 Got it, got it, got it, got it, got it. 410 00:24:27,666 --> 00:24:29,232 Got it. Is that good? Is that good? 411 00:24:29,234 --> 00:24:31,902 Okay. Phew! Yes! 412 00:24:34,105 --> 00:24:36,673 Yeah, that's it. I knew it! 413 00:24:36,675 --> 00:24:37,875 I knew it. 414 00:24:37,876 --> 00:24:40,144 Idiot! Oww! 415 00:24:40,145 --> 00:24:41,345 GUY: Shit! 416 00:24:41,346 --> 00:24:44,013 Nikki: Here, put this in a case. 417 00:24:46,018 --> 00:24:49,953 Jesus! What the hell is wrong with you people? 418 00:24:51,990 --> 00:24:54,557 Does this go a certain way? 419 00:24:54,559 --> 00:24:57,228 Now look, I still gotta get paid, 420 00:24:57,230 --> 00:24:59,329 but I'm gonna give you half price. 421 00:24:59,332 --> 00:25:00,931 (GROANS) 422 00:25:00,932 --> 00:25:03,334 Oh, and good work today. 423 00:25:03,336 --> 00:25:05,035 Oww! Fuck! 424 00:25:05,037 --> 00:25:07,805 Guy, come on. Sorry. Yeah. 425 00:25:08,574 --> 00:25:11,741 Got it. Got it. Got it. 426 00:25:11,743 --> 00:25:14,244 NIKKI: Guy, come on! Fucking got it! 427 00:25:14,247 --> 00:25:15,546 Son of a... 428 00:25:15,548 --> 00:25:18,883 NIKKI: I can't fucking believe this. 429 00:25:28,994 --> 00:25:33,297 (MUSIC PLAYING) 430 00:25:41,507 --> 00:25:43,307 You think this was my fault? 431 00:25:43,308 --> 00:25:46,509 Whose fault was it? You said an hour! 432 00:25:46,511 --> 00:25:48,378 Yeah, well, he was stuck on the Bachmann hitch. 433 00:25:48,381 --> 00:25:49,846 That's a really hard knot. 434 00:25:49,848 --> 00:25:51,448 The rabbit has to go around the tree three times 435 00:25:51,450 --> 00:25:53,083 before he goes down the hole. 436 00:25:53,085 --> 00:25:55,118 You know what, if I'm gonna be late, I usually text 437 00:25:55,121 --> 00:25:57,453 but you said you were sticking to the driving 438 00:25:57,455 --> 00:25:58,855 and I was handling the protection, 439 00:25:58,857 --> 00:26:00,457 which there was no need for, 440 00:26:00,459 --> 00:26:02,192 until you decided there was. 441 00:26:02,193 --> 00:26:05,028 I cannot believe that this is my life right now. 442 00:26:05,030 --> 00:26:09,633 We committed a crime, Nikki. An actual crime. 443 00:26:09,634 --> 00:26:11,902 I broke and entered. I assaulted. 444 00:26:11,903 --> 00:26:15,806 What if he's dead? What if I just murdered a doctor? 445 00:26:15,807 --> 00:26:19,076 Don't flatter yourself. It's a bump on the head at best. 446 00:26:19,077 --> 00:26:20,778 What if he calls the cops? 447 00:26:20,779 --> 00:26:23,747 Trust me, the doc is not gonna tell anyone about this. 448 00:26:23,749 --> 00:26:25,682 Besides him, I'm the only one that knows 449 00:26:25,684 --> 00:26:28,085 about your retarded heroics. 450 00:26:28,086 --> 00:26:29,420 Suffice to say, 451 00:26:29,422 --> 00:26:30,820 I'm not payin' your percentage on that stop. 452 00:26:30,823 --> 00:26:33,923 My percentage? You get 20% of the take. 453 00:26:33,925 --> 00:26:35,643 What "take"? 454 00:26:35,644 --> 00:26:37,361 Everything we make, you get 20% of. 455 00:26:37,363 --> 00:26:39,195 How do you not know this? 456 00:26:39,198 --> 00:26:40,798 I don't know, I guess... 457 00:26:40,799 --> 00:26:41,865 everything happened so fast, 458 00:26:41,866 --> 00:26:43,666 I forgot to ask about the money. 459 00:26:43,669 --> 00:26:46,936 Never forget to ask about the money. 460 00:26:46,939 --> 00:26:48,605 How much, exactly, are we talking about? 461 00:26:48,607 --> 00:26:51,775 Saturday night, a couple of stops... 462 00:26:51,777 --> 00:26:53,376 Plus the two girls we're picking up 463 00:26:53,378 --> 00:26:54,944 for the bachelor party... 464 00:26:54,947 --> 00:26:58,615 All in, you could walk away with a grand, maybe two. 465 00:26:58,617 --> 00:27:00,984 Two... Two thousand... dollars? 466 00:27:00,987 --> 00:27:02,752 $2,000? 467 00:27:02,753 --> 00:27:04,519 Just to be clear, I'm not doin' you any favors. 468 00:27:04,522 --> 00:27:06,690 You're gonna earn it. 469 00:27:09,362 --> 00:27:13,830 (MUSIC PLAYING) 470 00:27:17,202 --> 00:27:21,805 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 471 00:27:33,219 --> 00:27:34,652 Nikki: Grab my bag. 472 00:27:37,022 --> 00:27:38,705 Ladies, shake a leg. 473 00:27:38,707 --> 00:27:40,390 Hey, make yourself at home, why don't you? 474 00:27:40,393 --> 00:27:42,192 I always do. Where's Jaxi? 475 00:27:42,193 --> 00:27:44,327 Gettin' dolled up. 476 00:27:44,329 --> 00:27:45,461 Who's he? 477 00:27:45,463 --> 00:27:48,632 Hi, I'm Guy. I'm new. 478 00:27:48,634 --> 00:27:51,300 Nick, what the eff? 479 00:27:51,302 --> 00:27:53,770 (DOG WHIMPERING) 480 00:27:55,840 --> 00:27:58,041 Most people do that in the shower. 481 00:27:58,044 --> 00:27:59,809 I'm not most people. 482 00:27:59,811 --> 00:28:01,878 This is a huge night. We can't be breaking in a new dude. 483 00:28:01,881 --> 00:28:05,449 Zip it, okay? He's got a sweet ride. A Volvo. 484 00:28:08,153 --> 00:28:09,987 This him? NIKKI: Uh-huh. 485 00:28:09,989 --> 00:28:12,655 Hi. I'm Guy. 486 00:28:12,657 --> 00:28:14,057 He don't look like no driver. 487 00:28:14,059 --> 00:28:16,559 Look, we have a party in the penthouse at The Teal. 488 00:28:16,561 --> 00:28:17,760 We need a guy who's on point. 489 00:28:17,762 --> 00:28:20,064 He's up for it, okay? 490 00:28:20,066 --> 00:28:24,367 To prove it, he's gonna wash the hardware. 491 00:28:24,369 --> 00:28:26,537 (LAUGHING) 492 00:28:26,538 --> 00:28:29,772 NIKKI: Right, Guy? JAXI: Oh shit! 493 00:28:29,775 --> 00:28:32,076 That'll be fun. They've been cooking. 494 00:28:32,077 --> 00:28:34,644 GUY: Is it... Oh! JAXI: Scrub-a-dub-dub. 495 00:28:34,646 --> 00:28:36,980 Fallon: It's leaking. (LAUGHS) 496 00:28:36,981 --> 00:28:40,250 FALLON: Yeah. GUY: You're kidding, right? 497 00:28:40,251 --> 00:28:43,252 The den mother don't kid. FALLON: No. Go, go! 498 00:28:43,255 --> 00:28:44,654 Get it done, son. Okay. 499 00:28:44,656 --> 00:28:46,289 Chop, chop. 500 00:28:46,291 --> 00:28:48,325 Mine's the purple one. Have fun. 501 00:28:48,326 --> 00:28:50,693 It's dirty. 502 00:28:50,695 --> 00:28:52,229 ("MR. BIG STUFF" BY JEAN KNIGHT PLAYING) 503 00:28:52,230 --> 00:28:55,265 Oh! Eww! 504 00:28:55,267 --> 00:28:57,034 ♪ Oh, yeah ♪ 505 00:28:57,036 --> 00:28:58,801 Oh God! 506 00:29:00,538 --> 00:29:03,440 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 507 00:29:03,442 --> 00:29:04,708 ♪ Who do you think you are? ♪ 508 00:29:04,710 --> 00:29:07,944 Eww. ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 509 00:29:07,946 --> 00:29:11,181 (GAGGING) ♪ You're never gonna get my love ♪ 510 00:29:11,182 --> 00:29:15,586 ♪ Now because you wear all these fancy clothes ♪ 511 00:29:15,587 --> 00:29:17,253 ♪ Oh yeah ♪ 512 00:29:17,256 --> 00:29:20,691 ♪ And have a big fine car oh yes, you do now ♪ 513 00:29:20,692 --> 00:29:23,460 ♪ Do you think I can afford ♪ 514 00:29:23,461 --> 00:29:25,695 ♪ To give you my love ♪ 515 00:29:25,698 --> 00:29:27,396 ♪ Oh yeah ♪ 516 00:29:27,398 --> 00:29:30,834 ♪ You think you're higher than every star above ♪ 517 00:29:30,836 --> 00:29:33,936 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 518 00:29:33,939 --> 00:29:35,806 ♪ Who do you think you are? ♪ 519 00:29:35,807 --> 00:29:38,842 ♪ Mr. Big Stuff ♪ 520 00:29:38,844 --> 00:29:40,042 ♪ You're never gonna get my love ♪ 521 00:29:40,045 --> 00:29:41,744 Eww. What the... 522 00:29:41,747 --> 00:29:44,280 ♪ Now I know all the girls ♪ 523 00:29:44,282 --> 00:29:46,817 ♪ I've seen you with ♪ (PHONE RINGING) 524 00:29:46,818 --> 00:29:50,153 ♪ I know you broke their hearts ♪ 525 00:29:50,155 --> 00:29:52,088 GUY: Hon. Baby, why you call me? 526 00:29:52,090 --> 00:29:53,990 What happened with the lady and the doctor? 527 00:29:53,992 --> 00:29:55,893 GUY: No, she's... She's fine. 528 00:29:55,894 --> 00:30:00,364 I picked her up and now we're at this house in the Valley 529 00:30:00,365 --> 00:30:01,898 with two other girls... 530 00:30:01,901 --> 00:30:04,268 Wait. Two other hookers? 531 00:30:04,269 --> 00:30:06,170 Looks that way, yeah. 532 00:30:06,172 --> 00:30:09,205 ANNE: So you're with three hookers now? 533 00:30:09,208 --> 00:30:10,773 Yes. Uh-huh. 534 00:30:10,776 --> 00:30:14,510 It's just you, and three hookers, 535 00:30:14,512 --> 00:30:16,480 at a house in the Valley? 536 00:30:16,481 --> 00:30:20,017 Uh... yeah, but I'm about to drive them 537 00:30:20,019 --> 00:30:22,986 to a party, where there'll be a bunch of guys. 538 00:30:22,988 --> 00:30:26,856 Is that supposed to make me feel better? 539 00:30:26,858 --> 00:30:28,357 GUY: What do you want me to say? 540 00:30:28,359 --> 00:30:29,893 I mean, you're the reason I'm here at all. 541 00:30:29,894 --> 00:30:31,929 Remember, "somebody's daughter?" 542 00:30:31,931 --> 00:30:33,462 Yeah, well it seems like everyone's 543 00:30:33,464 --> 00:30:34,998 safe and sound now. 544 00:30:35,000 --> 00:30:36,900 A few hours ago, you wanted me to do anything 545 00:30:36,902 --> 00:30:38,234 to keep our insurance! 546 00:30:38,237 --> 00:30:39,903 Yeah, well baby, a few hours ago, 547 00:30:39,904 --> 00:30:41,704 there weren't half a dozen silicone tits 548 00:30:41,707 --> 00:30:43,472 staring you in the face. 549 00:30:43,474 --> 00:30:47,211 Yeah, that's not quite what's staring me in the face right now. 550 00:30:47,212 --> 00:30:49,112 (KNOCK ON DOOR) You still alive in there? 551 00:30:49,114 --> 00:30:50,747 NIKKI: Hey, you're just supposed to be washing those. 552 00:30:50,749 --> 00:30:52,115 Don't give yourself CPR. 553 00:30:52,116 --> 00:30:53,416 We're gonna be tardy to the party. 554 00:30:53,419 --> 00:30:55,352 Guy: Okay. All right. 555 00:30:55,354 --> 00:30:57,354 Babe. I have to go, okay? 556 00:30:57,355 --> 00:31:00,557 I gotta clean the hardware. 557 00:31:00,558 --> 00:31:01,625 I'll talk to you in a little bit. 558 00:31:01,626 --> 00:31:03,460 I love you, okay? Bye. 559 00:31:11,135 --> 00:31:12,869 Hardware? 560 00:31:12,872 --> 00:31:16,205 Okay. Good to go. 561 00:31:16,208 --> 00:31:17,807 You missed a spot. 562 00:31:17,809 --> 00:31:20,777 What, I scrubbed with antibacterial. 563 00:31:20,778 --> 00:31:24,080 On your face. 564 00:31:24,083 --> 00:31:25,715 Oh, God. 565 00:31:25,718 --> 00:31:29,219 Ugh, get it off. Is there...? Can I...? 566 00:31:29,221 --> 00:31:33,222 Come here. Don't be such a wuss. It's just lube. 567 00:31:33,224 --> 00:31:34,324 Eww. 568 00:31:34,326 --> 00:31:35,791 Okay, let's go. 569 00:31:35,794 --> 00:31:38,028 Fallon: Bye, Nicky Hilton. 570 00:31:38,029 --> 00:31:41,198 JAXI: I call shotgun. Fallon: No, bitch, I got shotgun. 571 00:31:41,200 --> 00:31:43,200 Bye, Nicky Hilton. 572 00:31:43,201 --> 00:31:46,636 (MUSIC PLAYING) 573 00:32:22,540 --> 00:32:24,740 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 574 00:32:24,742 --> 00:32:26,943 FALLON: Woohoo! 575 00:32:26,945 --> 00:32:28,045 Breath mints, anyone? 576 00:32:28,047 --> 00:32:30,513 JAXI: Nuh-uh, put that shit away. 577 00:32:30,516 --> 00:32:31,781 What is your problem? 578 00:32:31,784 --> 00:32:32,883 I'm not doin' another party 579 00:32:32,884 --> 00:32:34,550 with you about to be poppin' those. 580 00:32:34,552 --> 00:32:36,118 And why the hell not? 581 00:32:36,121 --> 00:32:38,454 Last time you ate my pussy, you had one in your mouth, 582 00:32:38,457 --> 00:32:40,589 I was numb for a week. 583 00:32:40,592 --> 00:32:42,058 Numb, but minty fresh. 584 00:32:42,060 --> 00:32:44,361 Bitch. I am always minty fresh. I'd like you fucking... 585 00:32:44,363 --> 00:32:47,698 Hey, our driver doesn't want to hear your gory details. 586 00:32:47,700 --> 00:32:49,766 Oh, no, don't mind me. 587 00:32:49,768 --> 00:32:52,068 Fallon: We won't. 588 00:32:55,406 --> 00:32:58,075 Uh, that's... 589 00:32:58,076 --> 00:33:00,576 that's an open container right there. 590 00:33:00,578 --> 00:33:02,078 Yeah, sure is. 591 00:33:02,080 --> 00:33:04,681 How else do you get the liquid out, huh? 592 00:33:04,682 --> 00:33:06,349 Yeah, well... 593 00:33:06,352 --> 00:33:08,551 I don't really think that's a good idea 594 00:33:08,554 --> 00:33:09,819 to have in the car. 595 00:33:09,821 --> 00:33:13,123 Right? I mean, lots of cops. 596 00:33:13,125 --> 00:33:15,325 (FALLON GIGGLING) What's with this guy? 597 00:33:15,326 --> 00:33:17,994 Tell me he's not for real? Please tell me. 598 00:33:17,997 --> 00:33:19,628 I'm sorry, but... 599 00:33:19,631 --> 00:33:22,732 do you want us to buckle our seat belts back here too, grandpa? 600 00:33:22,734 --> 00:33:23,834 'Cause we can. 601 00:33:23,836 --> 00:33:25,801 You know what? Go easy on him. 602 00:33:25,804 --> 00:33:29,740 He's sensitive... I mean, being a gay and all. 603 00:33:29,741 --> 00:33:31,708 Oh, you like boys? 604 00:33:31,710 --> 00:33:34,144 Oh my God, that's so cute! 605 00:33:34,145 --> 00:33:35,979 We never had a homo driver before. 606 00:33:35,980 --> 00:33:39,750 No wonder he took so long washing the dildos. 607 00:33:39,751 --> 00:33:42,786 Ooh, ain't she got your number! 608 00:33:42,788 --> 00:33:44,421 (LAUGHING) 609 00:33:44,423 --> 00:33:47,391 NIKKI: We're open-minded. JAXI: Yeah, always. 610 00:33:47,393 --> 00:33:52,461 ("MRS. VAIN" BY ROSS ROYCE PLAYING) 611 00:33:55,800 --> 00:34:00,369 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 612 00:34:32,304 --> 00:34:34,570 (KNOCK ON DOOR) 613 00:34:34,572 --> 00:34:37,074 Ah, yeah, my brothers! 614 00:34:37,076 --> 00:34:40,744 Da ladies are in da house! 615 00:34:40,746 --> 00:34:42,679 (CHEERS) 616 00:34:42,681 --> 00:34:44,181 Yo, you the pimp? 617 00:34:44,182 --> 00:34:46,416 You don't gotta front, bro. I know what's up. 618 00:34:46,418 --> 00:34:48,668 You got that gat? 619 00:34:48,670 --> 00:34:50,920 You're the third person to ask me that tonight and I... 620 00:34:50,922 --> 00:34:53,356 You know what, you don't wanna know, actually. 621 00:34:53,358 --> 00:34:55,891 Man: Oh, I bet he knows karate. 622 00:34:55,893 --> 00:34:57,927 What's up, bro? I'm Dan, the Best Man. 623 00:34:57,929 --> 00:34:59,262 Hey, Best Man Dan. 624 00:34:59,264 --> 00:35:00,664 I think we spoke on the phone. 625 00:35:00,666 --> 00:35:02,798 All the stuff in the rider, is in the room, 626 00:35:02,800 --> 00:35:04,967 including the Tabasco. 627 00:35:04,969 --> 00:35:06,969 Cool, let us get ready. 628 00:35:06,972 --> 00:35:08,737 Hey, boys. 629 00:35:08,739 --> 00:35:10,773 Look, I need these guys to have the night of their lives, 630 00:35:10,775 --> 00:35:13,443 I mean, I went all out and got them custom hats and everything. 631 00:35:13,445 --> 00:35:17,514 Umm... in terms of extras after the show, 632 00:35:17,516 --> 00:35:19,748 how does that work? 633 00:35:19,751 --> 00:35:21,451 Uh... 634 00:35:21,452 --> 00:35:24,820 Look... You know what? We can discuss that I'm sure. 635 00:35:24,822 --> 00:35:26,922 Awesome, dude. Awesome. 636 00:35:26,925 --> 00:35:28,791 Just say the word. Okay. 637 00:35:28,793 --> 00:35:32,795 (CHEERING) 638 00:35:32,797 --> 00:35:34,998 Everyone take your dicks out. 639 00:35:35,000 --> 00:35:37,134 Whoa! Guy? 640 00:35:37,135 --> 00:35:40,737 Guy fucking Carter! In the flesh. 641 00:35:40,739 --> 00:35:44,407 Yah! What the fuck? 642 00:35:44,409 --> 00:35:46,175 Devon. Yeah, man. 643 00:35:46,177 --> 00:35:48,811 How long has it been, hustler? 644 00:35:48,813 --> 00:35:52,081 Uh... I guess Grad school. 645 00:35:52,083 --> 00:35:55,684 Wow! That is like a lifetime ago. 646 00:35:55,686 --> 00:35:58,655 You heard I made partner 647 00:35:58,657 --> 00:36:00,789 at Pivot Point? 648 00:36:00,791 --> 00:36:03,326 No, wow. You made partner. 649 00:36:03,327 --> 00:36:06,829 Wow, that's... Congratulations. That's amazing. 650 00:36:06,831 --> 00:36:08,565 It's rad. 651 00:36:08,567 --> 00:36:12,034 Me, of all people, designing cell phones. 652 00:36:12,036 --> 00:36:14,503 Here's the secret. Just keep makin' 'em thinner. 653 00:36:14,505 --> 00:36:17,641 They'll keep makin' my pockets fatter. 654 00:36:17,643 --> 00:36:19,108 What about you, man? 655 00:36:19,110 --> 00:36:21,277 How's it shakin' with old Guy Carter? 656 00:36:21,280 --> 00:36:24,813 Oh... you know, it's good. 657 00:36:24,815 --> 00:36:29,619 Yeah, man. It's good. I'm solid. 658 00:36:31,722 --> 00:36:33,523 JAXI: Hey, driver. FALLON: Hey. 659 00:36:33,525 --> 00:36:37,027 NIKKI: Guy, get in here. Pour yourself a drink. 660 00:36:37,028 --> 00:36:38,561 Sucks when the civilians spot you. 661 00:36:38,563 --> 00:36:40,530 Jaxi: That never used to happen. 662 00:36:40,532 --> 00:36:42,398 Now it's like I can't even go to a grocery store 663 00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:44,266 without some jack-hole being like, 664 00:36:44,268 --> 00:36:45,534 "Weren't you in such and such?" 665 00:36:45,536 --> 00:36:48,003 Used to be if you took a really nasty job... 666 00:36:48,005 --> 00:36:49,739 Like when you did Black Cock Down? 667 00:36:49,740 --> 00:36:53,108 FALLON: And you did Weapons of Ass Destruction? 668 00:36:53,110 --> 00:36:54,777 You know, the only way someone would see it 669 00:36:54,780 --> 00:36:57,079 was if they went to an equally nasty video store, 670 00:36:57,081 --> 00:36:58,514 paid actual money, 671 00:36:58,516 --> 00:37:00,282 watched it in a VCR, returned it 672 00:37:00,284 --> 00:37:01,550 and never gave it another thought. 673 00:37:01,552 --> 00:37:03,452 Not only is everything fucking free now, 674 00:37:03,454 --> 00:37:06,155 They watch it over and over and over. 675 00:37:06,157 --> 00:37:08,090 You guys done with the grass-is-greener shit? 676 00:37:08,092 --> 00:37:09,759 We gotta bring Guy up to speed. 677 00:37:09,760 --> 00:37:12,061 You ready for your fifteen minutes, Big Daddy? 678 00:37:12,063 --> 00:37:15,398 Uh... I'm not sure I follow. 679 00:37:15,400 --> 00:37:17,900 They think you're a pimp, right? 680 00:37:17,902 --> 00:37:21,438 I thought there were no more pimps because of Craigslist? 681 00:37:21,440 --> 00:37:24,773 There aren't. But those fools out there don't know that. 682 00:37:24,775 --> 00:37:25,976 So run with it. 683 00:37:25,978 --> 00:37:27,409 Act like you're Willie Dynamite, 684 00:37:27,411 --> 00:37:28,945 been beating chicks down for years. 685 00:37:28,947 --> 00:37:31,447 That way they feel sorry for us and they tip harder. 686 00:37:31,449 --> 00:37:33,882 How many ones you got? 687 00:37:33,885 --> 00:37:35,351 A hundred. 688 00:37:35,353 --> 00:37:36,885 Here's what we're gonna do. 689 00:37:36,887 --> 00:37:38,954 Sell 'em, collect 'em again, sell 'em again. 690 00:37:38,956 --> 00:37:40,956 If they're not sticky by night's end, 691 00:37:40,958 --> 00:37:42,759 you didn't turn 'em around enough. 692 00:37:42,760 --> 00:37:45,228 And collect the panties, 'cause they'll steal 'em and that shit's costly. 693 00:37:45,230 --> 00:37:49,532 Amen. The most important thing, learn your script. 694 00:37:51,036 --> 00:37:52,668 What, I have to read this? 695 00:37:52,670 --> 00:37:55,771 NIKKI: You have to perform it. You're a pimp, remember? 696 00:37:55,773 --> 00:37:58,742 You gotta bring out that big boss, Mac Daddy, 697 00:37:58,744 --> 00:38:00,844 fur-coat-wearin' motherfucker 698 00:38:00,846 --> 00:38:02,378 that I know is in you. 699 00:38:02,380 --> 00:38:03,880 Jaxi: Bring it out, boo-boo. 700 00:38:03,882 --> 00:38:05,382 Okay, no. 701 00:38:05,384 --> 00:38:06,583 FALLON: What? JAXI: No? 702 00:38:06,585 --> 00:38:07,583 GUY: No, no, no, no, 703 00:38:07,585 --> 00:38:09,251 I... 704 00:38:09,253 --> 00:38:10,253 I can't do this. 705 00:38:10,255 --> 00:38:11,688 Fallon: Are you kidding? 706 00:38:11,690 --> 00:38:13,456 I can't do this. 707 00:38:13,458 --> 00:38:16,992 There are people out there that I... 708 00:38:16,994 --> 00:38:18,628 I'm sorry. 709 00:38:18,630 --> 00:38:21,998 I thought I was gonna be delivering pizzas tonight. 710 00:38:22,000 --> 00:38:23,532 Honestly. 711 00:38:23,534 --> 00:38:25,735 I'm in way over my head here. 712 00:38:25,737 --> 00:38:28,070 I... I... 713 00:38:28,072 --> 00:38:31,775 This... 714 00:38:31,777 --> 00:38:34,043 I understand, Guy. 715 00:38:34,045 --> 00:38:35,778 What? 716 00:38:37,048 --> 00:38:40,650 You do? Yeah, 'cause it's... 717 00:38:40,652 --> 00:38:43,619 Thank you. We get it. 718 00:38:43,621 --> 00:38:45,155 Thank you. 719 00:38:45,157 --> 00:38:48,358 Because this... is just not me. 720 00:38:48,360 --> 00:38:52,027 But, I'll pay for your cab, it's only fair. 721 00:38:52,030 --> 00:38:53,596 Nikki: We got it, Guy. 722 00:38:53,597 --> 00:38:56,599 One thing, though. You got a long drive. 723 00:38:56,601 --> 00:38:59,902 Might wanna visit the little boys room, first. 724 00:38:59,905 --> 00:39:02,572 Smart thinking. 725 00:39:02,574 --> 00:39:05,574 I do kind of have to go. So, excuse me. 726 00:39:07,179 --> 00:39:09,679 Mm mm mm. 727 00:39:09,681 --> 00:39:13,215 Who said, "Don't break a guy in on a Saturday night?" 728 00:39:13,217 --> 00:39:14,516 Who said it? 729 00:39:14,518 --> 00:39:16,952 Get your gear on and shut your faces. 730 00:39:22,460 --> 00:39:25,795 Oh, sorry, it's all yours. 731 00:39:26,864 --> 00:39:30,132 I'm not here for the bathroom. 732 00:39:30,135 --> 00:39:34,137 So, you goin' home to your boyfriend? 733 00:39:34,139 --> 00:39:35,505 Huh? 734 00:39:35,507 --> 00:39:37,606 You're still gay, right? 735 00:39:37,608 --> 00:39:41,911 Oh, yeah. I'm gay. See? 736 00:39:41,913 --> 00:39:44,880 Pink shirt. I'm gay. 737 00:39:46,251 --> 00:39:47,817 So... 738 00:39:49,121 --> 00:39:53,021 you don't like it when I do this? 739 00:39:53,023 --> 00:39:56,126 Um... not really. 740 00:39:57,461 --> 00:39:59,461 Or this...? (ZIPPER ZIPS) 741 00:40:01,032 --> 00:40:02,731 No. 742 00:40:05,170 --> 00:40:07,836 Or this? 743 00:40:07,838 --> 00:40:09,038 Umm... 744 00:40:11,041 --> 00:40:12,675 (CAMERA CLICKS) 745 00:40:12,677 --> 00:40:15,445 Homos don't pop boners when girls touch them. 746 00:40:15,447 --> 00:40:18,014 You know who does? Husbands. 747 00:40:19,684 --> 00:40:22,184 Look, can I have my phone, please? 748 00:40:22,186 --> 00:40:25,288 Is this your "boyfriend"? 749 00:40:25,289 --> 00:40:28,157 That's Anne. That is my wife. 750 00:40:28,159 --> 00:40:31,693 I wonder what Anne would think of this? 751 00:40:31,695 --> 00:40:36,432 Let's see, contacts. Anne Carter. 752 00:40:36,434 --> 00:40:38,168 "Attaching file"... 753 00:40:38,170 --> 00:40:40,269 Okay, Nikki... Nikki... 754 00:40:40,271 --> 00:40:42,472 Please... please. 755 00:40:42,474 --> 00:40:45,007 She's 37 weeks pregnant. 756 00:40:45,010 --> 00:40:46,643 She's very fragile right now. 757 00:40:46,644 --> 00:40:49,512 She will not understand this, not in a million years. 758 00:40:49,514 --> 00:40:51,648 I'm sure she wouldn't. I wouldn't. 759 00:40:51,650 --> 00:40:53,148 I mean, nobody likes a cheater. 760 00:40:53,150 --> 00:40:56,920 Okay, please, Anne will leave me. 761 00:40:56,922 --> 00:40:59,322 She will leave me, okay? 762 00:40:59,324 --> 00:41:03,059 You don't understand the stress we're under, 763 00:41:03,061 --> 00:41:04,226 both of us out of work. 764 00:41:04,228 --> 00:41:06,528 Oh, cry me a river, Volvo Guy. 765 00:41:06,530 --> 00:41:07,931 Yeah, things sound really desperate, 766 00:41:07,932 --> 00:41:10,199 with you turning your back on an easy grand. 767 00:41:10,202 --> 00:41:13,168 I... I told you, 768 00:41:13,170 --> 00:41:15,472 I can't do this job. 769 00:41:15,474 --> 00:41:18,373 It's too much for me. 770 00:41:18,376 --> 00:41:21,411 Everything's just... 771 00:41:21,413 --> 00:41:26,382 It's too much for me. 772 00:41:26,384 --> 00:41:28,784 I got two words for you, mister: 773 00:41:28,786 --> 00:41:31,554 Buck the hell up. 774 00:41:31,556 --> 00:41:33,755 Now, I'm gonna keep hold of this. 775 00:41:33,757 --> 00:41:35,458 And you're gonna learn these... 776 00:41:35,460 --> 00:41:36,992 and get your non-gay-ass 777 00:41:36,994 --> 00:41:39,295 into that room and you're gonna do your job. 778 00:41:39,297 --> 00:41:40,697 Okay? 779 00:41:50,641 --> 00:41:53,208 He was un-cool with it. Now he's cool with it. 780 00:41:53,210 --> 00:41:56,545 Let's go, let's go. Lets' go. 781 00:41:56,547 --> 00:42:00,182 (CHANTING) Bring them out! Bring them out! 782 00:42:00,184 --> 00:42:02,485 Bring them out! Bring them out! 783 00:42:02,487 --> 00:42:05,822 Bring them out! (CROWD APPLAUDING) 784 00:42:09,994 --> 00:42:11,193 Whoa, whoa, whoa... 785 00:42:11,195 --> 00:42:13,161 GUY: All right. Shit. 786 00:42:13,164 --> 00:42:14,329 MAN: That shirt is so pink. 787 00:42:14,331 --> 00:42:17,065 Hi. (FEEDBACK SQUEALS) 788 00:42:17,068 --> 00:42:19,869 Hello. Hi. Okay, okay. 789 00:42:19,871 --> 00:42:22,338 Sit down. MAN: Come on, get on with it. 790 00:42:22,340 --> 00:42:24,507 You want me to bring the ladies out... 791 00:42:24,509 --> 00:42:27,076 we gotta learn a few basic rules. 792 00:42:27,077 --> 00:42:28,777 (BOOING) 793 00:42:28,780 --> 00:42:30,612 Bullshit! 794 00:42:32,851 --> 00:42:36,585 First and foremost, no kissing the ladies on the mouth. 795 00:42:36,588 --> 00:42:38,086 They don't like it. 796 00:42:38,088 --> 00:42:40,722 (BOOING) 797 00:42:40,724 --> 00:42:42,724 It's alright, it's... MAN: Can I kiss you? 798 00:42:42,726 --> 00:42:46,295 That's what it says. Second rule... 799 00:42:46,297 --> 00:42:47,697 Man: Take off your top! 800 00:42:47,699 --> 00:42:49,766 No fingers in any holes. 801 00:42:49,768 --> 00:42:52,702 (BOOING) 802 00:42:52,704 --> 00:42:53,936 That's a deal breaker. 803 00:42:53,938 --> 00:42:57,739 That also goes for remote controls. 804 00:42:57,742 --> 00:43:02,045 Cheese doodles. Action figures. Action figures? 805 00:43:02,047 --> 00:43:03,947 MAN: Is my dick an action figure? 806 00:43:03,949 --> 00:43:08,284 Anything other than a sanctioned toy goes in the holes, 807 00:43:08,286 --> 00:43:09,284 show's over. 808 00:43:09,286 --> 00:43:12,422 (BOOING) 809 00:43:12,423 --> 00:43:14,590 One last thing. 810 00:43:14,592 --> 00:43:17,159 You want a hot show, you're gonna have to tip. 811 00:43:17,161 --> 00:43:18,695 Man: I'll show you my tip. 812 00:43:18,697 --> 00:43:22,331 I'll be selling ones all night, all right? 813 00:43:22,333 --> 00:43:24,400 So, anyone? 814 00:43:24,402 --> 00:43:28,237 (CHEERS) 815 00:43:28,239 --> 00:43:29,572 Man: Fuck yeah! 816 00:43:29,574 --> 00:43:31,306 GUY: Put your hands together 817 00:43:31,309 --> 00:43:33,443 for the owner and founder 818 00:43:33,445 --> 00:43:37,012 of "Bad Gurls" party services, 819 00:43:37,014 --> 00:43:38,213 Miss Nikki Winters 820 00:43:38,215 --> 00:43:41,250 and her BFFs Jaxi and Fallon! 821 00:43:41,251 --> 00:43:45,922 (ROCK MUSIC PLAYING) 822 00:43:45,923 --> 00:43:47,657 Take it off! 823 00:43:49,994 --> 00:43:51,827 Yeah! 824 00:44:00,170 --> 00:44:03,139 (LAUGHING) 825 00:44:03,141 --> 00:44:05,942 (MUSIC CONTINUES) 826 00:44:11,983 --> 00:44:14,449 (MEN BOOING) 827 00:44:14,452 --> 00:44:17,920 MAN: Work that! Shake it out right! 828 00:44:28,400 --> 00:44:31,833 (CHANTING) 829 00:44:47,552 --> 00:44:50,219 Good work, Guy. You get your phone back. 830 00:44:51,822 --> 00:44:53,356 Thanks. 831 00:44:54,525 --> 00:44:56,759 Jaxi: You like that, Daddy? 832 00:44:56,760 --> 00:45:01,030 There you go. Um-hmm. Yeah. 833 00:45:01,032 --> 00:45:02,632 I'll take that. 834 00:45:02,634 --> 00:45:06,768 Hey, bullshit on that shit! 835 00:45:06,771 --> 00:45:09,505 Your chick just lifted all my ones! 836 00:45:09,507 --> 00:45:12,541 That's fuckin' unacceptable. 837 00:45:12,543 --> 00:45:13,775 That's how you run your business, bro? 838 00:45:13,777 --> 00:45:15,478 No, no, no! I'm sorry. 839 00:45:15,480 --> 00:45:17,012 I'll get your ones back. 840 00:45:17,014 --> 00:45:18,914 Watch and learn. 841 00:45:18,916 --> 00:45:21,050 Oh yeah! Oh! 842 00:45:21,052 --> 00:45:22,719 (MEN CHEERING) 843 00:45:31,295 --> 00:45:34,329 (MAN CHANTING) 844 00:45:40,605 --> 00:45:42,505 Jaxi: Make it rain, baby! 845 00:45:42,507 --> 00:45:44,340 Hi, Daddy! 846 00:45:44,342 --> 00:45:47,510 (PHONE RINGING) 847 00:45:47,512 --> 00:45:51,581 JAXI: You like that? Give me more. 848 00:45:51,583 --> 00:45:53,382 Hello? JAXI: I'll keep giving you more. 849 00:45:53,384 --> 00:45:57,487 Anne. Hold on, hold on. 850 00:46:03,393 --> 00:46:05,795 Hon. Everything okay? 851 00:46:08,465 --> 00:46:12,201 What? Wait. Now? 852 00:46:12,202 --> 00:46:15,771 That's impossible. You're still three weeks away. 853 00:46:17,342 --> 00:46:21,210 (SMACKING) This is what marriage is gonna feel like. 854 00:46:21,211 --> 00:46:22,978 (SCREAMING) 855 00:46:24,081 --> 00:46:27,083 Holy Christ. Okay. Well, uh... 856 00:46:27,085 --> 00:46:30,887 What should we do? What do you want me to do? 857 00:46:34,192 --> 00:46:36,358 Okay, I'll be there. 858 00:46:39,030 --> 00:46:41,496 (SMACKING) 859 00:46:41,498 --> 00:46:42,831 Ow! Hey, it really hurts. 860 00:46:42,833 --> 00:46:45,034 Nikki: It's supposed to. 861 00:46:45,036 --> 00:46:47,702 GUY: Nikki, Nikki, Nikki, I gotta talk to you. 862 00:46:47,704 --> 00:46:49,137 I'm kinda in the middle of something. 863 00:46:49,139 --> 00:46:52,608 Guy: It's an emergency. Please? 864 00:46:52,610 --> 00:46:54,043 Nikki: Go to town. 865 00:46:54,045 --> 00:46:56,711 Man: His ass is bleeding, dude! 866 00:46:56,713 --> 00:46:58,713 It actually really hurts. 867 00:46:58,715 --> 00:47:00,650 Nikki: What's the problem? 868 00:47:00,652 --> 00:47:02,117 I gotta go. 869 00:47:02,119 --> 00:47:03,820 Haven't we been through this already tonight? 870 00:47:03,822 --> 00:47:06,588 This is different. I'm having a family crisis. 871 00:47:06,590 --> 00:47:09,257 Yeah, well, You leave, I'm having a financial crisis, okay? 872 00:47:09,260 --> 00:47:11,293 Party games are up next. You really wanna miss all the fun? 873 00:47:11,295 --> 00:47:13,762 No, no, but... Yeah, we're gonna put licorice up our pussies, 874 00:47:13,764 --> 00:47:14,963 and they're gonna eat it out. 875 00:47:14,965 --> 00:47:16,498 Then we pour tequila shots in our pussies 876 00:47:16,501 --> 00:47:17,900 and they drink it out. 877 00:47:17,902 --> 00:47:19,635 Oh, then we put whipped cream in our pussies 878 00:47:19,637 --> 00:47:21,036 and they lick... 879 00:47:21,039 --> 00:47:22,771 I get it, I get it. Lots of stuff going into the... 880 00:47:22,773 --> 00:47:25,173 FALLON: That's what we do. GUY: Pussies. 881 00:47:25,175 --> 00:47:26,842 Yeah, I need you here to cut the deals, 882 00:47:26,844 --> 00:47:27,909 keep the supplies coming 883 00:47:27,911 --> 00:47:29,378 tequila, candy, whipped cream... 884 00:47:29,380 --> 00:47:32,547 Nikki, my wife just called. 885 00:47:32,550 --> 00:47:34,650 She's having the baby. 886 00:47:34,652 --> 00:47:37,320 Are you fucking with me? 887 00:47:37,322 --> 00:47:38,621 I wish I were. 888 00:47:38,623 --> 00:47:40,922 Fine. Go have your damn infant. 889 00:47:40,925 --> 00:47:42,858 Just don't expect to get paid. 890 00:47:42,860 --> 00:47:43,860 JAXI: 'Cause you didn't do shit! 891 00:47:43,862 --> 00:47:46,628 I don't. It's... I don't. 892 00:47:46,630 --> 00:47:48,931 Bye, loser. 893 00:47:50,068 --> 00:47:52,034 Jaxi: I thought he was gay. 894 00:48:10,255 --> 00:48:12,320 (TIRES SCREECHING) 895 00:48:16,994 --> 00:48:18,594 Sorry. 896 00:48:20,197 --> 00:48:22,264 Hi. Maternity? 897 00:48:25,103 --> 00:48:26,402 Sorry. 898 00:48:27,704 --> 00:48:30,172 Hi. What's happening? 899 00:48:30,173 --> 00:48:32,007 Baby, this is Doctor Siegel. 900 00:48:32,010 --> 00:48:33,608 This is my husband, Guy. 901 00:48:33,610 --> 00:48:35,978 Hi. Is it coming out? 902 00:48:35,980 --> 00:48:38,614 Uh... It is, but not today. 903 00:48:38,615 --> 00:48:41,182 He says I'm not even dilated. 904 00:48:41,184 --> 00:48:43,184 But okay... What about the pain? 905 00:48:43,186 --> 00:48:45,820 Well, your wife was experiencing false labor. 906 00:48:45,822 --> 00:48:48,257 Which is not uncommon during the first pregnancy. 907 00:48:48,259 --> 00:48:49,759 Could be brought on by anything really. 908 00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:51,460 Dehydration, stress... 909 00:48:51,461 --> 00:48:54,664 We started a saline drip just to kind of settle things down. 910 00:48:54,666 --> 00:48:56,666 I'm already feeling better. 911 00:48:56,668 --> 00:48:59,235 Oh, thank God. 912 00:49:01,239 --> 00:49:05,775 Oh, thank God. I cannot have this kid yet. 913 00:49:05,777 --> 00:49:08,043 Well, she is coming out sooner or later. 914 00:49:08,045 --> 00:49:09,878 I'm gonna go make a note in your chart. 915 00:49:09,880 --> 00:49:11,646 I'll be back in a bit to take that drip out. 916 00:49:11,648 --> 00:49:13,682 Anne: Thank you. 917 00:49:17,355 --> 00:49:19,054 You know, it really hurts my feelings 918 00:49:19,056 --> 00:49:20,989 when you say things like that. 919 00:49:20,992 --> 00:49:22,358 Oh. 920 00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:25,894 I don't mean to upset you. I'm just... 921 00:49:25,896 --> 00:49:27,195 I'm just being honest. 922 00:49:27,197 --> 00:49:29,065 I'm not ready. 923 00:49:29,067 --> 00:49:32,934 What if I just suck at being a dad? Really. 924 00:49:32,936 --> 00:49:35,871 What if I'm a bad provider, 925 00:49:35,873 --> 00:49:38,206 financially and emotionally? 926 00:49:38,208 --> 00:49:39,875 I mean, think about it, Annie. 927 00:49:39,876 --> 00:49:42,945 We are bringing an actual human, 928 00:49:42,947 --> 00:49:46,514 a real human life into this world. 929 00:49:46,516 --> 00:49:48,416 She's gonna be a person. 930 00:49:48,418 --> 00:49:52,288 And everything that she is and is going to be 931 00:49:52,289 --> 00:49:54,039 depends upon us. 932 00:49:54,041 --> 00:49:55,791 What made us think we could do that? 933 00:49:55,793 --> 00:49:58,626 What if we're not up to the job? 934 00:49:58,628 --> 00:50:02,197 I just spent two hours with three women whose parents 935 00:50:02,199 --> 00:50:04,967 clearly did something wrong because there's no way 936 00:50:04,969 --> 00:50:07,068 a well-adjusted person 937 00:50:07,070 --> 00:50:09,070 would stick licorice rope up their- 938 00:50:09,072 --> 00:50:11,340 Licorice rope? I love Licorice rope. 939 00:50:11,342 --> 00:50:15,911 Yeah, me too. I was just saying how I wish I had some. 940 00:50:15,913 --> 00:50:18,347 Can't help ya there, but you're lucky 941 00:50:18,349 --> 00:50:20,048 you got a doctor with a sweet tooth. 942 00:50:20,050 --> 00:50:22,418 Would you care for a Fruit Burst? 943 00:50:22,420 --> 00:50:24,586 No, thank you. 944 00:50:25,822 --> 00:50:27,757 Baby, what if you're right? 945 00:50:27,759 --> 00:50:29,958 What if she hates us? 946 00:50:29,960 --> 00:50:32,293 Why wouldn't she? I hate my parents. 947 00:50:32,295 --> 00:50:34,163 You do not hate your parents. 948 00:50:34,164 --> 00:50:37,833 Well, I do. I mean, I don't totally love my parents. 949 00:50:37,835 --> 00:50:40,635 I wouldn't choose to hang out with them. 950 00:50:40,637 --> 00:50:42,003 What if she feels about me 951 00:50:42,005 --> 00:50:44,340 the way that I feel about my mom? 952 00:50:44,342 --> 00:50:46,041 Oh, my God. 953 00:50:46,043 --> 00:50:48,043 I'd kill myself. 954 00:50:48,045 --> 00:50:50,045 Sign here, and here... 955 00:50:50,047 --> 00:50:51,947 Pay that much now, 956 00:50:51,949 --> 00:50:54,583 and then mail this form into the insurance 957 00:50:54,585 --> 00:50:56,152 to get your reimbursement. 958 00:50:56,153 --> 00:50:59,188 If we still have insurance by then. 959 00:50:59,190 --> 00:51:00,456 Man. 960 00:51:00,458 --> 00:51:04,427 That's about how much Nikki said I'd make tonight. 961 00:51:04,429 --> 00:51:06,228 What, the hookers? 962 00:51:06,230 --> 00:51:10,199 Yeah, there was a lotta money flying around. 963 00:51:10,201 --> 00:51:14,903 But I'm done. Thank you. 964 00:51:14,905 --> 00:51:17,907 Come on. Let's get you home and into bed. 965 00:51:17,909 --> 00:51:20,108 You should probably come with me. 966 00:51:20,110 --> 00:51:23,012 No, I don't want to leave my car here. I'll drive. 967 00:51:23,014 --> 00:51:24,012 Are you sure? I'll meet you there. 968 00:51:24,014 --> 00:51:25,681 You sure? You sure? 969 00:51:25,682 --> 00:51:26,748 I love you. I love you. 970 00:51:26,751 --> 00:51:29,385 All right, I'll meet you at home. 971 00:51:34,391 --> 00:51:36,925 Ma'am, is there a water fountain around here? 972 00:51:36,927 --> 00:51:38,626 Right around the corner to the right. 973 00:51:38,628 --> 00:51:40,329 Thank you. 974 00:51:41,298 --> 00:51:43,699 (CREAKING) 975 00:51:55,947 --> 00:51:57,378 You? 976 00:51:58,882 --> 00:52:00,615 You. 977 00:52:02,452 --> 00:52:05,588 (GRUNTING) 978 00:52:12,163 --> 00:52:15,197 ORDERLY: Doctor? Doctor Kurtz? 979 00:52:15,199 --> 00:52:16,297 Yes. 980 00:52:16,300 --> 00:52:18,867 Is he...? Is that a patient? 981 00:52:18,869 --> 00:52:22,771 Hey... Code Grey! Code Grey! 982 00:52:22,773 --> 00:52:24,806 Oh shit. 983 00:52:24,809 --> 00:52:27,543 (CHATTERING ON PA SYSTEM) 984 00:52:27,545 --> 00:52:31,880 WOMAN ON PA SYSTEM: Dr. Grey, Dr. Grey. North wing. 985 00:52:31,882 --> 00:52:35,451 Dr. Grey, Dr. Grey. North wing. 986 00:52:50,501 --> 00:52:52,768 (DOOR CREAKS) 987 00:53:10,221 --> 00:53:14,389 GUY: Oh jeez! KURTZ: Shh. 988 00:53:16,327 --> 00:53:17,960 I just filled this syringe 989 00:53:17,961 --> 00:53:19,862 with 1.1 milliliters of Anectine. 990 00:53:19,864 --> 00:53:23,065 Enough to paralyze you for several hours. 991 00:53:23,067 --> 00:53:26,534 It's a very disagreeable experience. 992 00:53:26,536 --> 00:53:30,405 Whatta you say we go look up Nikki, huh? 993 00:53:30,407 --> 00:53:31,873 Okay. 994 00:53:31,876 --> 00:53:33,342 Come on. 995 00:53:33,344 --> 00:53:37,278 (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) 996 00:53:38,349 --> 00:53:40,815 What are you planning on doing to her? 997 00:53:42,519 --> 00:53:44,552 I don't know yet. 998 00:53:44,554 --> 00:53:47,556 You're really starting to sound like a creepy doctor, you know that? 999 00:53:47,557 --> 00:53:51,594 Yeah. You know what? Just keep driving. 1000 00:53:51,596 --> 00:53:53,963 What happened wasn't her fault. 1001 00:53:53,965 --> 00:53:55,697 It was mine. 1002 00:53:55,699 --> 00:53:58,333 I'm new to this. I thought she was being tortured. 1003 00:53:58,335 --> 00:53:59,768 I pay extra for that. 1004 00:53:59,769 --> 00:54:01,336 I know that now, 1005 00:54:01,338 --> 00:54:03,304 but I think you can appreciate the misunderstanding. 1006 00:54:03,306 --> 00:54:06,875 I mean, If you heard what I heard... it sounded pretty extreme. 1007 00:54:08,913 --> 00:54:10,512 Obviously, you have issues. 1008 00:54:10,514 --> 00:54:12,748 Maybe you should consider therapy? 1009 00:54:12,750 --> 00:54:15,583 Or you might want to rethink the missionary position. 1010 00:54:15,585 --> 00:54:17,018 It still works. 1011 00:54:17,021 --> 00:54:19,188 Rather well, as a matter of fact. 1012 00:54:19,190 --> 00:54:21,789 And it leaves s lot less room for confusion. 1013 00:54:21,791 --> 00:54:23,858 Shut the fuck up. 1014 00:54:26,097 --> 00:54:29,030 I don't think you realize how lucky you are. 1015 00:54:29,032 --> 00:54:30,465 You're a doctor. 1016 00:54:30,467 --> 00:54:32,934 You're getting to do, what I imagine, 1017 00:54:32,936 --> 00:54:33,936 you've always wanted to do... 1018 00:54:33,938 --> 00:54:35,237 And getting paid for it. 1019 00:54:35,239 --> 00:54:36,672 Do you know how rare that is? 1020 00:54:36,673 --> 00:54:38,239 Most people work their whole lives 1021 00:54:38,242 --> 00:54:39,907 and never get that chance. 1022 00:54:39,909 --> 00:54:41,277 You go in there half-cocked, 1023 00:54:41,278 --> 00:54:42,911 you're throwing it all away. 1024 00:54:42,913 --> 00:54:44,947 Your medical license? Gone. 1025 00:54:44,949 --> 00:54:46,981 And for what? 1026 00:54:46,983 --> 00:54:50,619 (CHANTING) Go! Go! Go! 1027 00:54:50,621 --> 00:54:53,521 Another thing, doctor, I Googled your house. 1028 00:54:53,523 --> 00:54:55,623 It is a Paul Williams. 1029 00:54:55,626 --> 00:54:59,427 Preservation boards go crazy for him 1030 00:54:59,429 --> 00:55:01,496 because he was black, working in an all-white hierarchy. 1031 00:55:01,498 --> 00:55:03,565 GUY: You could get landmark status. 1032 00:55:03,567 --> 00:55:05,333 Are you fucking kidding me? 1033 00:55:05,335 --> 00:55:08,003 Guy: Nikki. Shit. 1034 00:55:08,005 --> 00:55:10,105 GUY: Nikki, don't move. 1035 00:55:10,106 --> 00:55:12,840 Doctor, please don't. 1036 00:55:12,842 --> 00:55:16,411 Listen to me, think about it. Think about all of it. 1037 00:55:16,414 --> 00:55:17,813 You get landmark status. 1038 00:55:17,815 --> 00:55:23,018 Which, on your house, means no property taxes! 1039 00:55:23,019 --> 00:55:25,186 That's huge cash savings. 1040 00:55:25,188 --> 00:55:28,456 (ALL GROANING) 1041 00:55:29,827 --> 00:55:31,059 (GROANS) 1042 00:55:33,130 --> 00:55:34,463 Holy shit! 1043 00:55:34,465 --> 00:55:36,498 Why the fuck did you bring him here? 1044 00:55:36,500 --> 00:55:38,766 What? I... 1045 00:55:38,768 --> 00:55:40,202 Did you not just see...? 1046 00:55:40,204 --> 00:55:42,137 He kidnapped me! 1047 00:55:42,139 --> 00:55:46,675 Dr. fucking Strangelove works at our hospital. 1048 00:55:46,677 --> 00:55:49,510 He was hell bent on getting revenge or something. 1049 00:55:49,512 --> 00:55:51,213 NIKKI: I guess he's shit outta luck. 1050 00:55:51,215 --> 00:55:53,047 Guy: Yeah, it looks that way. 1051 00:55:53,050 --> 00:55:55,184 I hope to fuck he's not dead. 1052 00:55:55,186 --> 00:55:57,920 No, he's just paralyzed for a couple of hours. 1053 00:55:57,922 --> 00:56:00,989 It's a... 1054 00:56:00,990 --> 00:56:03,458 Thing. It's a neck... Whatever. 1055 00:56:03,460 --> 00:56:06,161 Awesome. So what's the deal with your baby? 1056 00:56:06,163 --> 00:56:08,197 False alarm. 1057 00:56:08,199 --> 00:56:11,733 Well, since you're here, want your old job back? 1058 00:56:16,273 --> 00:56:19,608 Come on, doc. I got you. 1059 00:56:22,179 --> 00:56:24,179 Look what the cat dragged in. 1060 00:56:24,181 --> 00:56:26,648 Hey! Now the party's gonna get really crazy! 1061 00:56:26,650 --> 00:56:30,052 Pull up a bottle, "driver." We're in the home stretch. 1062 00:56:31,621 --> 00:56:34,590 Hey, can you hook that for me, Love? 1063 00:56:34,592 --> 00:56:37,025 Oh, yeah. 1064 00:56:37,027 --> 00:56:39,460 That's not one of the regular Kiss guys, is it? 1065 00:56:39,463 --> 00:56:42,331 No, it's Eric Carr. He's the best. 1066 00:56:42,333 --> 00:56:44,465 He replaced Peter Criss on the drums. 1067 00:56:44,467 --> 00:56:47,101 GUY: Good to know. Yeah, he's a fox. 1068 00:56:47,103 --> 00:56:49,538 How can you tell? He's got paint all over his face. 1069 00:56:49,539 --> 00:56:51,239 No, I mean, literally. 1070 00:56:51,242 --> 00:56:53,909 He's a fox, like, that's his character. 1071 00:56:53,911 --> 00:56:55,411 Her mom slept with him once. 1072 00:56:55,413 --> 00:56:57,346 That's Fallon's big claim to fame, 1073 00:56:57,347 --> 00:56:59,748 she could have been the Kiss drummer's daughter. 1074 00:56:59,750 --> 00:57:03,085 NIKKI: Okay, this is it. The big finale. 1075 00:57:03,086 --> 00:57:06,789 We're lookin' to get five bills. It's up to you. 1076 00:57:06,791 --> 00:57:10,992 At this point, there's pretty much nothing that'll shock me. 1077 00:57:10,994 --> 00:57:12,795 Except this. 1078 00:57:12,797 --> 00:57:16,697 We're looking to get every single mother fuckin' dollar. 1079 00:57:16,699 --> 00:57:19,835 FALLON: Yeah. Work it down to the bone. 1080 00:57:19,836 --> 00:57:21,637 (SHOUTING) 1081 00:57:21,639 --> 00:57:23,539 I'm ticklish. Balls out. 1082 00:57:24,407 --> 00:57:25,940 Man: This guy? 1083 00:57:25,943 --> 00:57:28,309 All right, everybody. 1084 00:57:28,311 --> 00:57:30,077 Guy: Alright, alright. 1085 00:57:30,079 --> 00:57:32,648 (CROWD JEERING) 1086 00:57:32,650 --> 00:57:36,418 Listen, this is the moment you've all been waiting for. 1087 00:57:36,420 --> 00:57:38,454 (CROWD CHEERING) 1088 00:57:40,623 --> 00:57:44,025 It's time for the girl-on-girl... 1089 00:57:44,027 --> 00:57:48,262 on-girl sex show. 1090 00:57:48,264 --> 00:57:49,398 Now, now listen, 1091 00:57:49,400 --> 00:57:53,668 this is one hot, sick show. 1092 00:57:53,670 --> 00:57:57,539 Everything you see is real. 1093 00:57:57,541 --> 00:58:00,409 I'm serious. Everything. One hundred percent. 1094 00:58:00,411 --> 00:58:02,710 None of it is fake. Listen, listen... 1095 00:58:02,713 --> 00:58:05,581 (CROWD SHOUTING) 1096 00:58:05,583 --> 00:58:08,516 All right, all right. Stop it! 1097 00:58:08,518 --> 00:58:10,751 GUY: You want proof? MAN: Bullshit! 1098 00:58:10,753 --> 00:58:14,523 Our girl Fallon, she's gonna prove it. 1099 00:58:14,525 --> 00:58:18,427 There's no way to fake what she's about to do. 1100 00:58:18,429 --> 00:58:21,762 Guy: Okay, it is the real deal. 1101 00:58:21,764 --> 00:58:25,132 Now I don't wanna ruin the surprise 1102 00:58:25,135 --> 00:58:27,668 but suffice to say, 1103 00:58:27,670 --> 00:58:30,739 you might not wanna sit too close. 1104 00:58:30,740 --> 00:58:34,576 (CROWD GASPS) 1105 00:58:34,577 --> 00:58:36,978 I need to see the money. Help me out. 1106 00:58:36,981 --> 00:58:39,581 'Cause I can't... We can't go forward without the money! 1107 00:58:39,583 --> 00:58:42,117 So what do you say? How about some money? 1108 00:58:42,119 --> 00:58:46,420 (CROWD CHEERING) 1109 00:58:46,422 --> 00:58:47,956 You guys are very smart. 1110 00:58:47,958 --> 00:58:49,458 'Cause you just bought yourself a memory 1111 00:58:49,460 --> 00:58:53,795 that you will never ever forget. Boom. 1112 00:58:53,797 --> 00:58:56,164 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1113 00:58:56,166 --> 00:58:58,367 (CHEERING) 1114 00:58:58,369 --> 00:59:00,668 What I tell you? 1115 00:59:02,239 --> 00:59:04,739 Woo! 1116 01:00:05,869 --> 01:00:08,704 (PHONE RINGING) 1117 01:00:12,943 --> 01:00:15,344 ANNE: Where'd you go? I thought you were right behind me? 1118 01:00:15,346 --> 01:00:17,813 GUY: I got sidelined. ANNE: By what? 1119 01:00:17,815 --> 01:00:19,780 It's a long story, try not to be mad, 1120 01:00:19,782 --> 01:00:22,650 but, I'm back at the hotel. 1121 01:00:22,652 --> 01:00:24,753 Now you've got me thinking about this baby. 1122 01:00:24,755 --> 01:00:27,588 What if I hate her? What if she's ugly? 1123 01:00:27,590 --> 01:00:30,257 What if she has one of those giant raspberry birthmarks 1124 01:00:30,260 --> 01:00:32,027 on her face and I can't bond with her 1125 01:00:32,028 --> 01:00:33,795 because I can't even look at her? 1126 01:00:33,797 --> 01:00:35,429 What if I hate her because she's beautiful, 1127 01:00:35,431 --> 01:00:37,565 more beautiful than I am? 1128 01:00:37,568 --> 01:00:40,001 And I get super jealous of her and resentful 1129 01:00:40,003 --> 01:00:42,471 and competitive because she has six pack abs... 1130 01:00:42,472 --> 01:00:43,972 Nikki: Guy, come on. 1131 01:00:43,974 --> 01:00:45,773 While I bust my ass at CrossFit every week 1132 01:00:45,775 --> 01:00:47,842 and still have this weird an inner tube around my waist? 1133 01:00:47,844 --> 01:00:52,313 Oh, my God, Guy, I feel the postpartum already setting in. 1134 01:00:52,315 --> 01:00:54,081 Does California have a law 1135 01:00:54,083 --> 01:00:55,684 where you can drop off a baby at a fire station... 1136 01:00:55,686 --> 01:00:58,820 Babe, babe, babe, babe. You're spinning. 1137 01:00:58,822 --> 01:01:01,489 I know! That's why I need you to come home right now! 1138 01:01:01,492 --> 01:01:04,760 The party isn't over yet. 1139 01:01:04,762 --> 01:01:07,228 We need to clean up and get these girls home. 1140 01:01:07,231 --> 01:01:09,264 Look, just try to relax. 1141 01:01:09,266 --> 01:01:14,001 Try to lay down. Lay down and make some chamomile tea. 1142 01:01:14,003 --> 01:01:15,170 GUY: Just calm... 1143 01:01:15,172 --> 01:01:17,005 ANNE: I can't calm down! 1144 01:01:17,007 --> 01:01:19,074 You know why, because I don't have a "me" 1145 01:01:19,076 --> 01:01:21,643 to calm me down like I do for you! 1146 01:01:21,644 --> 01:01:23,711 The one time I need a "me," 1147 01:01:23,713 --> 01:01:24,980 you're not here! (PHONE CLICKS) 1148 01:01:24,981 --> 01:01:27,815 (FALLON MOANING) Babe? Babe? 1149 01:01:29,253 --> 01:01:32,920 (MOANING) 1150 01:01:37,226 --> 01:01:41,396 (MOANING CONTINUES) 1151 01:01:44,702 --> 01:01:45,766 Fallon: Oh, yeah! 1152 01:01:45,768 --> 01:01:48,769 (CROWD CHANTING) Go! Go! Go! 1153 01:01:53,077 --> 01:01:56,143 Crowd: Oh! 1154 01:01:57,246 --> 01:01:59,981 Oh, my God! That's so wrong! 1155 01:02:05,556 --> 01:02:09,090 (MEN CHATTERING) 1156 01:02:10,728 --> 01:02:13,128 Go clean yourself up. 1157 01:02:13,130 --> 01:02:14,795 What is that stuff? 1158 01:02:14,797 --> 01:02:17,766 Nobody knows. But you should clean it off. 1159 01:02:18,568 --> 01:02:20,335 (CHUCKLES) 1160 01:02:20,336 --> 01:02:23,237 I think I'm in love. 1161 01:02:37,387 --> 01:02:39,353 Oh, shit. 1162 01:02:53,469 --> 01:02:55,237 We got robbed. 1163 01:02:55,239 --> 01:02:57,271 Robbed? 1164 01:02:57,273 --> 01:02:58,405 As in, someone came in here 1165 01:02:58,407 --> 01:03:00,208 and snaked all our cash. 1166 01:03:00,210 --> 01:03:01,842 Wait, are you sure? 1167 01:03:01,844 --> 01:03:05,413 This was full. Now it's not. 1168 01:03:05,414 --> 01:03:06,981 Who would do something like that? 1169 01:03:06,983 --> 01:03:09,184 One of those limp dick fuck boys. 1170 01:03:09,186 --> 01:03:10,851 You killed yourselves for that money! 1171 01:03:10,853 --> 01:03:13,288 I wouldn't go that far, but, yeah, 1172 01:03:13,289 --> 01:03:14,623 it took some effort. 1173 01:03:14,625 --> 01:03:16,391 Hold on, wait. 1174 01:03:16,393 --> 01:03:20,061 Maybe... Maybe... Maybe it like just fell out or something. 1175 01:03:20,063 --> 01:03:22,681 It didn't. 1176 01:03:22,681 --> 01:03:25,300 Well, we should at least have look around for it, don't you think? 1177 01:03:25,302 --> 01:03:29,704 I agree. Let's look for it. 1178 01:03:29,706 --> 01:03:33,574 FALLON: Mother fuckers! Jaxi: Yeah, somebody's about to get fucked up. 1179 01:03:33,577 --> 01:03:35,643 It's not under here. 1180 01:03:35,646 --> 01:03:37,278 Wait! Ladies. 1181 01:03:42,085 --> 01:03:43,751 Hey, party's goin' great, man. 1182 01:03:43,753 --> 01:03:45,686 That show was a mind fuck. Yeah, sure was. 1183 01:03:45,688 --> 01:03:48,690 We gotta talk about that thing we were talkin' about. The extras? 1184 01:03:48,692 --> 01:03:51,159 Yeah, that's not happening right now. 1185 01:03:51,161 --> 01:03:52,561 What the fuck? 1186 01:03:52,563 --> 01:03:53,894 You said we'd get extras. 1187 01:03:53,896 --> 01:03:55,362 You gave me your word. 1188 01:03:55,364 --> 01:03:57,498 We got robbed, motherfucker. 1189 01:03:57,501 --> 01:03:59,668 Either you make up the difference 1190 01:03:59,670 --> 01:04:01,635 or we don't let anyone outta here. 1191 01:04:01,637 --> 01:04:02,871 You're high. 1192 01:04:02,873 --> 01:04:04,306 None of these guys would rob you. 1193 01:04:04,307 --> 01:04:05,806 They're all agents. 1194 01:04:05,809 --> 01:04:08,275 Suit yourselves. 1195 01:04:08,277 --> 01:04:10,811 Ladies, lock the doors. 1196 01:04:10,813 --> 01:04:13,581 This is ridiculous. I'm calling security. 1197 01:04:13,583 --> 01:04:14,748 No, you ain't. 1198 01:04:14,751 --> 01:04:16,550 Uh-oh. Shit just got real. 1199 01:04:16,552 --> 01:04:18,753 Wha... Nikki, whoa. Nikki... 1200 01:04:18,755 --> 01:04:20,487 you never mentioned guns. 1201 01:04:20,489 --> 01:04:22,324 I thought we were gonna talk. 1202 01:04:22,326 --> 01:04:23,925 We are gonna talk. 1203 01:04:23,927 --> 01:04:25,726 This helps them listen. 1204 01:04:25,728 --> 01:04:28,963 Okay, people. We got a situation here. 1205 01:04:28,965 --> 01:04:31,800 One of you boners stole my money. 1206 01:04:31,802 --> 01:04:34,635 Nobody is leaving this fucking hotel 1207 01:04:34,637 --> 01:04:36,137 until I get it back. 1208 01:04:36,139 --> 01:04:40,442 I want all of you cunts on the carpet. 1209 01:04:40,443 --> 01:04:42,110 Now! 1210 01:04:42,112 --> 01:04:46,146 JAXI: Yeah, who's taking their dicks out now, bitch? 1211 01:04:46,148 --> 01:04:48,148 He gets a pass. 1212 01:04:49,820 --> 01:04:51,119 You can take whatever I got. 1213 01:04:51,121 --> 01:04:52,786 Take my wallet. Take anything. 1214 01:04:52,789 --> 01:04:55,856 I don't want your wallet, prick. I want my money. 1215 01:04:55,858 --> 01:04:57,259 The money I earned. 1216 01:04:57,260 --> 01:04:58,893 Fallon: Yeah, the money we earned. 1217 01:04:58,896 --> 01:05:00,728 Nikki: Guy, check 'em. 1218 01:05:00,731 --> 01:05:02,496 Check 'em. 1219 01:05:03,500 --> 01:05:04,766 Aren't you two cozy. 1220 01:05:04,768 --> 01:05:06,918 Fucking guys spooning. 1221 01:05:06,918 --> 01:05:09,068 JAXI: This one's clean. FALLON: This guy's clean. 1222 01:05:13,443 --> 01:05:14,842 Clean. Move! 1223 01:05:14,844 --> 01:05:18,646 GUY: Clean here. FALLON: Ooh, library card. 1224 01:05:18,648 --> 01:05:20,882 GUY: Clean. FALLON: Munch some carpet! 1225 01:05:20,884 --> 01:05:23,684 I touched his penis. Sorry. Clean. 1226 01:05:23,686 --> 01:05:26,121 JAXI: Clean. NIKKI: Check his pants. 1227 01:05:27,056 --> 01:05:29,123 Help! Congratulations, dude. 1228 01:05:29,126 --> 01:05:31,293 MAN: Thank you. GUY: Sorry. Clean. 1229 01:05:31,295 --> 01:05:33,061 What about him? 1230 01:05:33,063 --> 01:05:34,795 Hey, you don't have to worry about me. 1231 01:05:34,797 --> 01:05:36,630 I mean, you know I'm cool. 1232 01:05:36,632 --> 01:05:39,434 JAXI: Clean. FALLON: Clean. 1233 01:05:46,043 --> 01:05:48,610 Hey, man. I got laid off six months ago. 1234 01:05:48,612 --> 01:05:51,346 I had to do it. I'll split it with you. 1235 01:05:51,347 --> 01:05:53,815 NIKKI: I know one of you boners stole this shit! 1236 01:05:53,817 --> 01:05:56,985 Come on, man, help out a bro. 1237 01:06:08,798 --> 01:06:11,199 It's this one. (ROARS) 1238 01:06:11,201 --> 01:06:12,833 You dick! 1239 01:06:12,835 --> 01:06:15,536 We got a runner! Get him! 1240 01:06:15,539 --> 01:06:17,137 (SCREECHES) 1241 01:06:21,545 --> 01:06:23,978 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1242 01:06:23,981 --> 01:06:26,481 Fallon: Go! Go! Go! 1243 01:06:26,483 --> 01:06:28,750 Move your ass, Guy. 1244 01:06:28,751 --> 01:06:30,552 Jaxi: Elevator's not coming, bitch! 1245 01:06:30,554 --> 01:06:33,021 Fallon: Get over here, fucker! 1246 01:06:34,523 --> 01:06:37,057 Stop right there! 1247 01:06:37,059 --> 01:06:38,492 Jaxi: Please jump. 1248 01:06:38,494 --> 01:06:39,793 Hey... 1249 01:06:39,795 --> 01:06:41,061 Make my fucking night. 1250 01:06:41,063 --> 01:06:42,831 Oh, I was just messin' with you guys. 1251 01:06:42,833 --> 01:06:45,233 I was totally gonna give it back. 1252 01:06:46,737 --> 01:06:48,469 You idiot. 1253 01:06:51,608 --> 01:06:54,409 It's right here. Every cent. 1254 01:06:54,411 --> 01:06:55,744 Frisk his ass. 1255 01:06:55,746 --> 01:06:57,778 That's just... Hey. 1256 01:06:57,780 --> 01:06:59,780 Homeboy is doughy as fuck. 1257 01:06:59,782 --> 01:07:01,750 Look here. I forgot about that. Sorry. 1258 01:07:03,219 --> 01:07:05,920 Okay, I told you, I was gonna give it back. 1259 01:07:05,922 --> 01:07:07,155 I was just bustin' your balls. 1260 01:07:07,157 --> 01:07:09,257 Turn around and get on your knees. 1261 01:07:09,259 --> 01:07:12,393 What? On your knees, fuck-tard! 1262 01:07:12,396 --> 01:07:14,262 Jaxi: You like to play games, right? 1263 01:07:14,264 --> 01:07:16,630 What're you gonna do, Guy? Someone's about to get fucked up. 1264 01:07:16,632 --> 01:07:18,766 Guy, buddy, please, please, don't let them hurt me, please. 1265 01:07:18,768 --> 01:07:20,168 I'm so sorry! 1266 01:07:20,170 --> 01:07:24,139 I'm so, so, so, so sorry! Please... 1267 01:07:24,141 --> 01:07:25,806 GUY: Nikki, Nikki... Hey, listen. 1268 01:07:25,809 --> 01:07:28,175 Ladies... piss on this fucker. 1269 01:07:28,177 --> 01:07:30,277 DEVON: What? FALLON: Hell yeah! 1270 01:07:30,280 --> 01:07:32,447 Nikki, hold on, that's just plain gross. 1271 01:07:32,449 --> 01:07:37,085 You cannot pee-pee on me! Guy, don't let them do this! 1272 01:07:37,086 --> 01:07:39,420 Honey, my bladder's about to burst. (ZIPPER SCRATCHES) 1273 01:07:39,422 --> 01:07:41,155 NIKKI: Do you wanna go first, or should I? 1274 01:07:41,157 --> 01:07:42,923 You filthy bitches! 1275 01:07:42,925 --> 01:07:46,360 No, don't don't don't! Seriously, stop. Don't... 1276 01:07:46,362 --> 01:07:48,063 Yeah, pee on him. 1277 01:07:48,065 --> 01:07:50,632 Devon: Oh God, stop. No! 1278 01:07:50,634 --> 01:07:52,400 Nikki: Rainbow kiss! 1279 01:07:55,072 --> 01:07:58,206 (DEVON GROANING) 1280 01:07:58,208 --> 01:08:00,108 Devon: It's in my mouth! 1281 01:08:00,110 --> 01:08:02,409 Fallon, what the fuck are you doing? 1282 01:08:02,411 --> 01:08:03,577 You said pee on him. 1283 01:08:03,579 --> 01:08:05,579 He's blindfolded. 1284 01:08:05,581 --> 01:08:07,648 He can't tell the difference! 1285 01:08:07,650 --> 01:08:09,050 Well, I really had to go. 1286 01:08:09,052 --> 01:08:12,286 Devon: You nasty, filthy bitches! 1287 01:08:12,289 --> 01:08:16,390 Wait. Why does she get to pee on him and I don't? 1288 01:08:16,393 --> 01:08:18,760 FALLON: Give it back to me, motherfucker! 1289 01:08:18,761 --> 01:08:19,961 Jaxi: Bitch! 1290 01:08:19,962 --> 01:08:21,829 Jaxi: Smells like asparagus. 1291 01:08:23,600 --> 01:08:25,300 Hey, man. 1292 01:08:26,970 --> 01:08:30,505 Good thing she didn't have to poop, huh? 1293 01:08:32,609 --> 01:08:34,309 What? 1294 01:08:35,078 --> 01:08:37,811 (SIRENS WHIRR) 1295 01:08:51,595 --> 01:08:53,494 Having fun yet? 1296 01:08:55,364 --> 01:08:58,699 Is this what every Saturday night is like? 1297 01:08:58,702 --> 01:09:00,902 Pretty much. 1298 01:09:00,904 --> 01:09:02,804 How do you survive? 1299 01:09:05,175 --> 01:09:07,175 Smooth jazz helps. 1300 01:09:09,179 --> 01:09:11,945 I think I might need something stronger. 1301 01:09:11,948 --> 01:09:14,381 Smooth metal. 1302 01:09:15,217 --> 01:09:17,952 Why are you such a stress case? 1303 01:09:17,953 --> 01:09:21,322 Oh, I don't know. 1304 01:09:21,323 --> 01:09:23,158 Because I'm about to have a kid. 1305 01:09:23,159 --> 01:09:25,560 I don't have a career. 1306 01:09:25,561 --> 01:09:28,095 Your kid doesn't need you to have a career. 1307 01:09:28,097 --> 01:09:30,597 Really? What does she need? 1308 01:09:32,002 --> 01:09:35,802 For you to basically do what you've been doing tonight with us. 1309 01:09:35,805 --> 01:09:40,207 (CHUCKLES) Okay, I think you and I have very different philosophies 1310 01:09:40,210 --> 01:09:42,810 on how to raise kids. 1311 01:09:42,811 --> 01:09:44,212 I don't know. 1312 01:09:44,213 --> 01:09:47,582 No, I think it boils down to a ride and protection. 1313 01:09:47,583 --> 01:09:49,917 Sure you can throw in washing their stuff 1314 01:09:49,920 --> 01:09:51,152 and picking up after them, 1315 01:09:51,154 --> 01:09:53,555 which, incidentally, you also did tonight. 1316 01:09:53,556 --> 01:09:56,957 But mostly, 1317 01:09:56,960 --> 01:09:59,527 kids just need a ride and protection. 1318 01:09:59,529 --> 01:10:02,630 It doesn't matter if you drive a Porsche or a Pontiac. 1319 01:10:02,631 --> 01:10:05,899 As long as the kid knows that you're gonna be there on time 1320 01:10:05,902 --> 01:10:07,202 and they're gonna be safe, 1321 01:10:07,203 --> 01:10:08,869 it's a job done. 1322 01:10:12,042 --> 01:10:14,908 We both know you can do that. 1323 01:10:14,911 --> 01:10:18,712 You can do that like a champ. 1324 01:10:18,715 --> 01:10:20,847 Now, look... 1325 01:10:20,850 --> 01:10:22,850 Now before we clear out of the room, 1326 01:10:22,851 --> 01:10:25,552 do an idiot check. Come on. 1327 01:10:39,168 --> 01:10:42,302 Hey, ladies, hold up. 1328 01:10:43,340 --> 01:10:46,407 I've got something of yours. 1329 01:10:46,408 --> 01:10:48,576 Oh my God, these are my favorites. 1330 01:10:48,578 --> 01:10:50,811 Someone was supposed to collect all the panties. 1331 01:10:50,814 --> 01:10:53,247 Man: They were under the couch. 1332 01:10:53,250 --> 01:10:57,150 I'm just glad I was able to get 'em back to you. 1333 01:10:57,153 --> 01:10:58,920 Well, thanks. 1334 01:11:01,291 --> 01:11:04,826 MAN: It really was a dynamite show. 1335 01:11:04,828 --> 01:11:06,094 I'd also like to say 1336 01:11:06,095 --> 01:11:08,997 I'm sorry for what happened back there. 1337 01:11:08,998 --> 01:11:10,131 Some guys... 1338 01:11:10,132 --> 01:11:11,231 they just don't say a lot 1339 01:11:11,234 --> 01:11:14,034 for the male gender, now do they? 1340 01:11:14,037 --> 01:11:16,136 Yeah, well, if it wasn't for the male gender, 1341 01:11:16,139 --> 01:11:18,171 we wouldn't have jobs. 1342 01:11:18,173 --> 01:11:21,275 True, which leads me to my next point. 1343 01:11:21,278 --> 01:11:22,909 Now, I know you said you guys were done... 1344 01:11:22,912 --> 01:11:24,545 Here we go. 1345 01:11:24,546 --> 01:11:26,346 Dude, go home. 1346 01:11:26,349 --> 01:11:28,615 Bust a load off in your sink. 1347 01:11:28,618 --> 01:11:32,020 I got two hundies burnin' a hole in my pocket. 1348 01:11:32,021 --> 01:11:33,887 My truck is right in the corner, 1349 01:11:33,890 --> 01:11:37,057 so, what do ya say? 1350 01:11:42,931 --> 01:11:45,233 What the hell. Awesome. 1351 01:11:45,234 --> 01:11:49,069 This will just take a few seconds, no offense. 1352 01:11:49,072 --> 01:11:50,371 Come on. 1353 01:11:50,372 --> 01:11:52,739 Some taken. But... yeah. Shall we? 1354 01:11:56,046 --> 01:11:59,146 My cousin made over a million bucks selling vitamins. 1355 01:11:59,149 --> 01:12:00,547 Fallon: Maybe coke vitamins. 1356 01:12:00,550 --> 01:12:03,051 No, bitch. Real fucking vitamins. 1357 01:12:03,052 --> 01:12:04,551 Nu-uh. Yeah-huh. 1358 01:12:04,554 --> 01:12:06,854 FALLON: Okay, that was so black-ish of you. 1359 01:12:06,855 --> 01:12:09,489 JAXI: Bitch, I am black. Stop fucking playing with me like that, Fallon. 1360 01:12:09,492 --> 01:12:14,395 So is she gonna go all the way with that guy, right over there? 1361 01:12:14,396 --> 01:12:16,764 Jaxi: What're you, 12? 1362 01:12:16,765 --> 01:12:17,899 I'm just sayin'. 1363 01:12:17,900 --> 01:12:20,201 Oh, he's worried. 1364 01:12:20,203 --> 01:12:21,903 You worried about her, pops? 1365 01:12:21,904 --> 01:12:25,972 Well, when you actually think about it, it is worrisome. 1366 01:12:25,975 --> 01:12:28,208 JAXI: Okay, here's what they don't teach you 1367 01:12:28,211 --> 01:12:29,944 when you buy a ticket at the door. 1368 01:12:29,945 --> 01:12:31,445 Pros, do the absolute minimum. 1369 01:12:31,448 --> 01:12:33,980 That means, we dance a little, talk dirty... 1370 01:12:33,983 --> 01:12:36,451 Finger ourselves. Maybe a hand job. 1371 01:12:36,453 --> 01:12:39,654 If he can get it up, which, more than likely, he can't. 1372 01:12:39,655 --> 01:12:42,957 Exactly. These guys are so full of vodka and whatnot, 1373 01:12:42,958 --> 01:12:44,992 it's mostly babysitting. 1374 01:12:44,993 --> 01:12:47,095 That's why they call it a trick. 1375 01:12:47,096 --> 01:12:50,331 Professionals, rarely, if ever, 1376 01:12:50,332 --> 01:12:52,166 give up the cookie. 1377 01:12:52,167 --> 01:12:55,203 No fucking way. Oh, my God, this cannot be fucking happening. 1378 01:12:55,204 --> 01:12:57,838 WHAT'S NOT HAPPENING? FALLON: The guy from the party. He's busting Nikki! 1379 01:12:57,841 --> 01:13:00,108 He's a fucking cop, we gotta get out of here. 1380 01:13:00,109 --> 01:13:01,309 Yeah, yeah. Guy, drive! 1381 01:13:01,310 --> 01:13:02,676 What about Nikki? 1382 01:13:02,679 --> 01:13:04,145 Nikki's going to jail right now, 1383 01:13:04,146 --> 01:13:05,712 which is not where we're goin', 1384 01:13:05,715 --> 01:13:07,981 so you need to drive this fucking car 1385 01:13:07,984 --> 01:13:09,417 before I do it for you. 1386 01:13:09,418 --> 01:13:11,551 We can't leave. What 'cause of Nikki? 1387 01:13:11,554 --> 01:13:15,021 Fucking drive the car! Back the fuck up! 1388 01:13:15,024 --> 01:13:17,457 Fallon: Let's go! 1389 01:13:19,328 --> 01:13:22,029 JAXI: What the fuck? FALLON: What're you doin'? 1390 01:13:22,030 --> 01:13:23,730 Fallon: Come on, dude. 1391 01:13:23,731 --> 01:13:25,431 JAXI: What the fuck? FALLON: Why are you stopping? 1392 01:13:25,435 --> 01:13:27,167 JAXI: What are you doing? FALLON: Keep going! 1393 01:13:27,170 --> 01:13:29,203 JAXI: Drive forward! What the fuck? 1394 01:13:29,204 --> 01:13:31,506 Fallon: Press the fucking pedal! 1395 01:13:33,275 --> 01:13:35,475 (TIRES SCREECHING) 1396 01:13:35,478 --> 01:13:37,845 Man: Whoa, hey! 1397 01:13:37,846 --> 01:13:38,945 Go! Go! Go! 1398 01:13:38,948 --> 01:13:40,247 (SCREAMS) 1399 01:13:40,250 --> 01:13:42,850 Hey! 1400 01:13:42,851 --> 01:13:45,720 (SCREAMING) 1401 01:13:47,990 --> 01:13:50,390 Fuck! You did not just do that! 1402 01:13:50,393 --> 01:13:52,193 What the fuck, Tokyo Drift? 1403 01:13:52,194 --> 01:13:53,761 I don't see 'em in the back. 1404 01:13:53,762 --> 01:13:56,229 JAXI: That's because there's nobody behind us. 1405 01:13:56,231 --> 01:13:58,765 Tokyo Drift, you did it! 1406 01:13:59,735 --> 01:14:02,302 (CRASHES) 1407 01:14:02,305 --> 01:14:05,172 (ALL GROANING) 1408 01:14:06,842 --> 01:14:08,109 Oh, fuck! 1409 01:14:08,110 --> 01:14:10,043 Ah... Is everyone okay? 1410 01:14:10,046 --> 01:14:11,279 Not really. 1411 01:14:11,280 --> 01:14:12,846 What happened? 1412 01:14:12,849 --> 01:14:14,314 We're fucked. 1413 01:14:14,317 --> 01:14:16,417 FALLON: Oh my God, you guys, jail fucking sucks. 1414 01:14:16,418 --> 01:14:19,753 JAXI: But on a Saturday night, jail sucks donkey dick. 1415 01:14:19,756 --> 01:14:23,056 Hold on. Stop it. No one's going to jail. 1416 01:14:23,059 --> 01:14:25,426 Guy. Unless you can fly... 1417 01:14:25,427 --> 01:14:28,229 Come on, come on. Let's go! 1418 01:14:28,230 --> 01:14:31,064 (SIREN WHIRRS) 1419 01:14:33,203 --> 01:14:34,534 All right. Guys, come on. 1420 01:14:34,537 --> 01:14:36,237 Nikki: Even if you leave the car, 1421 01:14:36,238 --> 01:14:37,637 they're still gonna arrest you at home. 1422 01:14:37,640 --> 01:14:40,106 But they're not gonna arrest you. Come on! 1423 01:14:40,109 --> 01:14:43,144 Jaxi: Down the alley. Go! 1424 01:14:50,453 --> 01:14:53,220 OFFICER: Adam 12 to dispatch of the 29th alleyway of 3rd and 4th... 1425 01:14:53,222 --> 01:14:54,889 we're requesting additional units, over. 1426 01:14:54,890 --> 01:14:56,423 OFFICER 2: Let's head 'em off at Temple. 1427 01:14:56,426 --> 01:14:58,525 Let's move, let's move 1428 01:15:01,197 --> 01:15:04,064 (SIREN WHIRRS) 1429 01:15:10,038 --> 01:15:13,940 JAXI: Come on! Hey, wait for the white people! 1430 01:15:17,514 --> 01:15:19,079 Jaxi: Oh, watch out for that. 1431 01:15:22,284 --> 01:15:24,051 Hey, hey, hey! 1432 01:15:45,207 --> 01:15:47,742 (SIREN WHIRRS) 1433 01:15:55,150 --> 01:15:56,617 Nikki: We lost them. 1434 01:15:56,618 --> 01:15:59,185 JAXI: Who are the baddest bitches on the planet? 1435 01:15:59,188 --> 01:16:02,023 We are! Nobody's fucking with us! 1436 01:16:03,493 --> 01:16:06,594 I'd hug you right now... if I had arms. 1437 01:16:08,698 --> 01:16:10,864 I guess I got a little carried away. 1438 01:16:10,867 --> 01:16:12,899 Just a teeny tiny. 1439 01:16:12,902 --> 01:16:15,536 (JAXI LAUGHS) 1440 01:16:15,537 --> 01:16:17,438 Hey, do you have a bobby pin? 1441 01:16:17,439 --> 01:16:19,673 Sparkly or regular? 1442 01:16:19,676 --> 01:16:21,408 Fallon! 1443 01:16:21,411 --> 01:16:23,243 Jeez. Give it here. 1444 01:16:24,913 --> 01:16:27,113 Jaxi: Wake your ass up, ho. 1445 01:16:27,115 --> 01:16:28,548 Fallon: Huh? 1446 01:16:28,551 --> 01:16:30,984 This is my souvenir. 1447 01:16:30,987 --> 01:16:33,487 Wait. Aren't you forgetting something? 1448 01:16:33,488 --> 01:16:35,555 Oh yeah. My money. 1449 01:16:35,557 --> 01:16:39,025 For such a bad night, it was actually pretty good. 1450 01:16:40,630 --> 01:16:42,997 We have Guy to thank for this. 1451 01:16:42,998 --> 01:16:46,300 You rocked harder than Eric Carr. 1452 01:16:46,301 --> 01:16:48,234 The Fox. 1453 01:16:48,237 --> 01:16:50,304 You're a stand-up guy, Guy. 1454 01:16:50,305 --> 01:16:52,038 Hey, you too. Well... 1455 01:16:52,041 --> 01:16:53,740 I get it. 1456 01:16:53,743 --> 01:16:55,643 I gotta get this one to bed. 1457 01:16:55,645 --> 01:16:57,845 (YAWNING) Bye, guys. 1458 01:16:59,314 --> 01:17:01,815 Guy, you can drive me any time. 1459 01:17:01,818 --> 01:17:04,585 As soon as I get out of jail. 1460 01:17:04,587 --> 01:17:06,487 Fallon: Ahh, hold me. 1461 01:17:06,488 --> 01:17:08,588 (DOG BARKING) 1462 01:17:08,591 --> 01:17:11,958 You're taking the dog out. 1463 01:17:18,635 --> 01:17:20,635 Nikki: Can you wait a bit? 1464 01:17:20,636 --> 01:17:22,970 GUY: It'll just be a sec, I gotta take her bags up. 1465 01:17:22,971 --> 01:17:25,605 NIKKI: Well, actually, it might be more than a sec. 1466 01:17:25,608 --> 01:17:27,707 I wanna show you something. 1467 01:17:27,710 --> 01:17:30,845 After all you've done, you deserve a reward. 1468 01:17:34,283 --> 01:17:36,016 (DOOR CREAKS) 1469 01:17:39,354 --> 01:17:41,622 Can I get you a drink? 1470 01:17:41,623 --> 01:17:44,257 Ahh... No, thank you, I'm good. 1471 01:17:44,260 --> 01:17:46,292 I'll be right back. 1472 01:17:55,904 --> 01:17:57,771 Guy: Wow. 1473 01:17:57,774 --> 01:18:02,275 This is an impressive amount of tea pots here. 1474 01:18:02,278 --> 01:18:05,746 NIKKI: Thanks. Yeah, I've been collecting 'em forever. 1475 01:18:05,747 --> 01:18:08,515 They're mostly vintage. 1476 01:18:08,518 --> 01:18:10,016 I'm really into animal ones. 1477 01:18:10,019 --> 01:18:12,953 I've gotten some sick deals on eBay. 1478 01:18:14,289 --> 01:18:18,926 See that elephant one with the pink flower? 1479 01:18:18,927 --> 01:18:21,295 Guess how much I paid for that? 1480 01:18:21,296 --> 01:18:24,331 Uh, fifteen dollars? 1481 01:18:24,332 --> 01:18:27,033 Ninety-nine cents. Plus shipping. 1482 01:18:27,036 --> 01:18:29,502 You can't beat that with a stick. 1483 01:18:29,505 --> 01:18:33,940 Wow. No, that is a sick deal. 1484 01:18:34,944 --> 01:18:39,246 Wow, yeah... Your place is... 1485 01:18:39,247 --> 01:18:41,448 very tastefully done. 1486 01:18:42,452 --> 01:18:45,219 (JAZZ MUSIC PLAYING) 1487 01:18:47,890 --> 01:18:51,225 I'm glad you're noticing these things. 1488 01:18:51,226 --> 01:18:54,895 It's good, considering why I brought you here. 1489 01:19:00,737 --> 01:19:03,837 I want to show you something. 1490 01:19:03,840 --> 01:19:07,041 Something very personal. 1491 01:19:15,318 --> 01:19:18,485 Nikki: It's mine, that land. 1492 01:19:18,488 --> 01:19:22,189 The only thing it's missing is a house. 1493 01:19:23,192 --> 01:19:25,792 A tasteful house. 1494 01:19:29,332 --> 01:19:33,533 You realize, building a house from the ground up 1495 01:19:33,536 --> 01:19:36,237 is incredibly expensive. 1496 01:19:36,238 --> 01:19:40,407 I mean, it could be hundreds of thousands of dollars. 1497 01:19:40,408 --> 01:19:43,109 Guy, what do you know about me? 1498 01:19:44,146 --> 01:19:45,345 Not much. 1499 01:19:45,347 --> 01:19:47,515 What's one thing you do know? 1500 01:19:50,118 --> 01:19:51,551 You like money? 1501 01:19:51,554 --> 01:19:54,921 And do you think I spend it, or save it? 1502 01:19:57,659 --> 01:19:59,126 Save it? 1503 01:19:59,127 --> 01:20:02,529 And if I've been saving for eleven years, 1504 01:20:02,532 --> 01:20:04,497 how much do you think I have? 1505 01:20:04,500 --> 01:20:06,167 A lot? 1506 01:20:06,168 --> 01:20:08,569 Try a fuck of a lot. 1507 01:20:10,006 --> 01:20:12,806 So when can I see those drawings? 1508 01:20:14,243 --> 01:20:16,577 Next week. Definitely. 1509 01:20:16,578 --> 01:20:18,746 I expect a friends and family discount. 1510 01:20:18,747 --> 01:20:21,282 Yeah, without a doubt. 1511 01:20:22,585 --> 01:20:24,885 Let me give you my lawyer's details. 1512 01:20:24,886 --> 01:20:27,887 Have your wife call as soon as the police arrest you. 1513 01:20:27,890 --> 01:20:30,123 Tell her Patricia referred you. 1514 01:20:30,126 --> 01:20:33,260 That's your real name? Patricia? 1515 01:20:33,261 --> 01:20:35,061 Patricia Cornbluth. 1516 01:20:35,064 --> 01:20:38,998 Now beat it. I need my beauty sleep. 1517 01:20:39,001 --> 01:20:42,403 Thank you. Patricia... 1518 01:20:43,439 --> 01:20:45,038 Guy: Cornbluth. 1519 01:20:48,476 --> 01:20:50,010 Nikki: Oh, and, Guy? 1520 01:20:50,011 --> 01:20:52,779 When you come back with those drawings... 1521 01:20:52,782 --> 01:20:55,615 these will be waiting for you. 1522 01:20:55,618 --> 01:20:59,086 (CHUCKLES) I can't wait. 1523 01:21:42,163 --> 01:21:44,230 You came back. 1524 01:21:44,233 --> 01:21:46,966 Anne... 1525 01:21:46,969 --> 01:21:50,837 I am so sorry that I got us into this mess, 1526 01:21:50,840 --> 01:21:53,039 but Nikki... 1527 01:21:53,042 --> 01:21:57,744 she has this lawyer who will handle the entire thing, 1528 01:21:57,747 --> 01:22:01,381 and she might not charge us, as a favor to Nikki. 1529 01:22:01,384 --> 01:22:04,752 I think if I go peacefully, 1530 01:22:04,753 --> 01:22:08,555 maybe they won't come down too hard on me. 1531 01:22:08,556 --> 01:22:10,791 What are you talking about? 1532 01:22:10,792 --> 01:22:14,560 Weren't... they here? The police? 1533 01:22:15,664 --> 01:22:17,297 No. 1534 01:22:19,402 --> 01:22:21,068 Did they call? 1535 01:22:21,069 --> 01:22:23,037 No, Guy, no police have come or called. 1536 01:22:23,038 --> 01:22:25,439 What the hell is going on? 1537 01:22:31,012 --> 01:22:34,814 Maybe I dreamt the whole thing. 1538 01:22:34,817 --> 01:22:37,251 ANNE: Are you in some kind of trouble? 1539 01:22:40,389 --> 01:22:41,988 Maybe not. 1540 01:22:45,860 --> 01:22:49,128 I'm glad you're back. 1541 01:22:49,131 --> 01:22:52,966 I didn't think you were coming back after my mini meltdown. 1542 01:22:55,837 --> 01:22:58,972 You're allowed to have a meltdown. 1543 01:22:58,975 --> 01:23:02,275 Of course I was coming back. 1544 01:23:02,278 --> 01:23:05,078 How else was I gonna be able to give you this? 1545 01:23:07,483 --> 01:23:09,649 What did you have to do to get all this? 1546 01:23:09,652 --> 01:23:11,385 You don't wanna know. 1547 01:23:11,386 --> 01:23:12,685 Actually, I do. 1548 01:23:14,724 --> 01:23:18,891 Okay. I'll tell you everything. 1549 01:23:18,894 --> 01:23:22,195 Because... Because the police 1550 01:23:22,198 --> 01:23:26,432 are probably going to come here and take me away. 1551 01:23:26,435 --> 01:23:29,103 So, umm... What? 1552 01:23:29,104 --> 01:23:32,171 But I want you to know that... 1553 01:23:36,045 --> 01:23:39,779 I don't care anymore about ducks being in a row. 1554 01:23:41,283 --> 01:23:43,016 I don't. 1555 01:23:43,019 --> 01:23:45,418 Ducks be damned. 1556 01:23:45,421 --> 01:23:49,088 As long as I have you and our daughter... 1557 01:23:50,225 --> 01:23:52,525 Ducks can go fuck themselves. 1558 01:23:52,528 --> 01:23:55,895 I don't think that would be a good idea. 1559 01:23:55,898 --> 01:23:59,033 Then there'd just be more to take care of. 1560 01:24:00,502 --> 01:24:03,970 Is that... is that a siren? 1561 01:24:03,972 --> 01:24:07,207 No. That is the John Lennon mobile 1562 01:24:07,208 --> 01:24:08,708 I attached to the crib. 1563 01:24:10,046 --> 01:24:12,779 I assembled it myself... 1564 01:24:12,782 --> 01:24:15,548 and a few other things. 1565 01:24:52,421 --> 01:24:55,154 (SIREN WHIRRS) 1566 01:25:00,462 --> 01:25:03,764 Isn't this that Volvo we were lookin' for. 1567 01:25:08,470 --> 01:25:11,204 It is that Volvo we were lookin' for. 1568 01:25:11,207 --> 01:25:15,341 Motherfucker's behind on like, six payments. 1569 01:25:15,344 --> 01:25:17,677 (CHUCKLES) 1570 01:25:17,680 --> 01:25:19,779 Let's go repo that shit. 1571 01:25:19,782 --> 01:25:21,715 Yeah. Yeah. 1572 01:25:21,716 --> 01:25:23,117 (CHUCKLES) 1573 01:25:23,118 --> 01:25:28,221 (MUSIC PLAYING) 1573 01:25:29,305 --> 01:25:35,865 Support us and become VIP member to remove all ads from www.OpenSubtitles.org112062