Original subtitles

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]

[CRICKETS CHIRPING]

[FATHER SIGHS]

[EXCLAIMING IN ANNOYANCE]

[UTENSILS CLATTERING]

Honey, it's family hour, there must be something on.

DAUGHTER: Oh, wow, Candy Critters!

[FATHER EXCLAIMS]

Oh, great, it's Monsters, our favorite show.

[MONSTROUS LAUGH]

Shh, it's starting.

[MONSTROUS LAUGH]

[FATHER CHUCKLES]

[CREAKING]

[RAIN PATTERING] [THUNDER RUMBLING]

[HORN BLARING]

MAN: Witch, I'll give you something to moan about.

[CRASHING]

WOMAN: No.

[GLASS SHATTERING]

WOMAN: Let me go.

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

WOMAN: Get away from me, you pig.

[CRASHING]

MAN: Here, you... [GLASS BREAKING]

MAN: Get my hands on you.

MANAGER: Yeah, office. Yeah, hi, this is Mr. Dennis

in room 27.

MANAGER: Uh-huh.

[EXHALES] Listen, there's a couple next door to me,

they're making a lot of noise and these wall are very thin.

MANAGER: Well, mister, it's a free country.

They can do what they want. I don't care, you know.

Yeah, I know it's a free country.

MANAGER: What do you expect me to do about it?

I'd like to change my room.

MANAGER: We have no more space.

[MAN NEXT DOOR] Someone should have buried you...

Wait, hold on, don't... don't give me that.

This whole place is vacant except for these two rooms.

I don't see why you have to jam us up together.

MANAGER: Yeah, well, uh, Mister,

if you've disturbed the bed then you will have to pay a linen fee.

A linen fee? For what?

Like, you know, we ought to bring the cleaning lady in,

and stuff, and she'll have to change the bed.

Wait... I mean, I'm sitting on the bed

but I haven't actually slept in it.

Well, Mister, it's quite late...

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

I... I used a glass.

Look, Mister, you're gonna have to pay for the room anyway.

Oh, come on, wait, this is ridiculous!

If this is your idea of customer service,

I tell you, I'm never gonna stay here again.

Mister, do you wanna check out? You know you can.

No, I don't want to check out.

Come on, it's raining outside.

Salesman of the year.

What cheek. It makes me sick. I can't stand it.

Well, same to you.

[SLAMS RECEIVER] Jerk!

[WOMAN NEXT DOOR] Get out of here!

[GLASS BREAKING]

"Do you have any idea what time it is?"

[GLASS BREAKING]

[WOMAN NEXT DOOR] Oh, God, you stink!

Do you?

[WOMAN NEXT DOOR] Do you hear me?

No, I didn't think so.

WOMAN: Never...

It's very late to set something up for me.

MAN: What the hell?

Maybe you don't, but I do, okay.

So, I just appreciate it if you could just be a little...

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

[GLASS BREAKING]

[WOMAN SCREAMING]

MAN: Hey, you, leave that alone!

Hey, can you keep it down in there?

Some people are trying to sleep.

WOMAN: Get out of here!

If you don't shut up I'm gonna call the police!

[SIGHS]

WOMAN: Go.

[WHISPERING] Why?

[WOMAN MOANING]

[WOMAN SCREAMS]

[SCREAMING]

[WOMAN SOBBING]

Eighteen gallons of gas

at $1.5 a gallon,

totally

19.90...

[WOMAN SOBBING]

[SIGHS]

[EXHALES]

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

[TELEPHONE RINGING]

Hello?

[MAN BREATHING HEAVILY]

Who is this?

MAN: Is this the guy sticking his snout where it don't belong?

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

What do you want?

Man: You take my advice.

Get in your car, get as far away from here as you can

right now while you got time.

I don't need your advice.

MAN: What do you need? Encouragement?

Like if I came over there and tore your guts out, huh?

You like that?

That does it. I'm calling the police.

[MAN LAUGHING]

MAN: They got old-fashioned type phones here,

you can't get an outside line. On this I hang up.

MAN: You don't believe me? Try it.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

MAN: See?

What I tell you? [LAUGHING]

[WOMAN] Don't you ever come back.

[CAR ENGINE CRANKING]

[WOMAN MOANING]

WOMAN: You splashed me on purpose, you swine.

[ENGINE REVVING]

[SIGHS]

Geez.

[LOCKS CASE]

[EXHALES]

One quart of oil,

ten W30 at $3.70,

and one night, extremely overpriced,

crummy motel,

never stay here again, rotten service,

low class clientele, the pits, $29.

[KNOCKING ON DOOR]

Who is it?

WOMAN: Please, help me.

I'm afraid.

My husband and I just had a terrible fight.

And I'm afraid he'll come back.

And what do you want me to do?

WOMAN: He ripped out our phone.

Oh, please, just let me come inside and call the police.

WOMAN: Please, he may come back.

Why me, lady?

WOMAN: You're the only other guest here, and

the manager hates women.

Hates everybody.

All right.

[UNLOCKS DOOR] Come on in.

[MYSTERIOUS MUSIC PLAYING]

Did... Did he hurt you?

No. I'm fine.

I'm just cold.

Oh, uh, I'll get you a towel, you can dry off.

[EXHALES]

[DOOR LOCKING]

I'm sorry to disturb you.

I mean, with your work and all.

Oh, I've got nothing till tomorrow.

But you were trying to work?

No, it's, it's... It's nothing important, really.

I was just doing expenses.

I'm a salesman.

Flatware.

I'm Sue Weatherby.

I, uh...

My husband and I

have a farm over by the county line.

[HORN BLARING]

Uh, John Dennis.

Pleased to meet you,

John.

Oh, this towel's kinda skimpy.

You mind?

Must've sounded awful to you

carrying on like that.

I tried to tell him to keep quiet,

but my husband is a pig.

I mean,

he has no manners.

Are you married?

[HESITANTLY] I'm divorced.

Ah.

Then you know what it is to wake up one day

and find your dream lover turned into a...

Oh.

I don't know.

It was something out of

a nightmare, I guess.

Well, it doesn't always have to be that way,

sometimes you just drift apart.

Hmm.

You know...

No, I have had

three husbands,

and it's always the same.

You get married to Prince Charming,

the next day he's Porky Oink-Oink.

I, uh...

Maybe if I rest a minute

before I call.

[CLANGING]

I don't want to sound like an hysterical woman.

The police don't pay any mind to you if you seem upset.

Oh, I know what you mean.

I was gonna call the police myself before,

but then I thought, "What would I sound like to them?"

I mean, they always make you feel

like you're bothering them or something, you know.

Exactly. Like they got real important stuff to do.

Well, you can stay as long as you like.

You're a real gentleman, John.

You wouldn't have anything to drink around here, would you?

Actually I do.

I mean, I don't usually drink myself, but...

Well, you know, I, I... I keep some around for the customers.

Is, uh,

whiskey all right?

Oh.

I mean, whatever. I don't normally drink either,

but, under the circumstances...

What the hell, right?

I'll have some with a splash of water, no ice.

I think there's some glasses in the bathroom.

[CLEARS THROAT]

You know, I didn't know what to do

when I heard you fighting in there.

I hope I didn't make things worse

when I was banging on the wall.

Oh, no.

No. You probably saved my life.

You startled him,

so, I was able to get out of his grip.

Do you mind if I lay this on the heater so if it can get dry?

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

I said, do you mind if I lay this on the heater so it can get dry?

He took off with our suitcase.

I'm afraid this is

all I've got left to wear.

Oh, oh yeah, sure.

Go ahead, that's a good idea.

[HISSING]

[MOANING]

Ah.

That is just what I needed.

Did you change your mind about calling the police?

Well...

I'm not really so mad anymore.

I don't want to get Ted in trouble.

He'll probably calm down

after he's had something to eat.

There's no restaurants around here for miles.

Oh, that doesn't matter.

He'll eat any kind of swill.

He's a walking garbage can.

[CLANKING]

[ENGINE REVVING]

[DOOR OPENS AND CLOSES]

TED: Where you at, witch?

That's him.

TED: I'm gonna teach you a lesson.

You can't hide.

I used to have some kind of power over him.

I could calm him down if I talked in a certain voice.

Hey...

I can't protect you if you don't do what I say.

TED: I know your smell.

He's gonna smell me out.

Don't be silly. Shh.

TED: You're in there

with him.

Go away!

TED: Shove her out the door.

I said go away!

TED: Get rid of her.

Chuck her out! Chuck her out!

You're in danger now.

[KNOCKING]

[BREATHES DEEPLY] I better go to him.

Wait.

I'll be good.

Just don't hurt him.

[SCREAMING]

Oh, God!

[GLASS SHATTERS]

[SCREAMING]

[BREATHING HEAVILY]

How could you marry a guy that ugly?

I told you, he wasn't always like that.

He sort of became ugly.

Why didn't you just leave?

You know what 200 acres of prime land is worth around here?

A couple of million.

If he should die,

I'm a rich widow.

I can sell out and start over some place else.

Maybe, Australia.

You have this all figured out?

Everything except one bit.

I need a partner.

Somebody to help me.

Somebody smart, like you.

Yeah, I am smart.

There's probably angles to this you've never even though of.

The moment I laid eyes on you I knew

this is the answer to my prayers.

My white knight.

My prince charming.

I wouldn't mind starting over with a couple of million

and you.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC]

[GRUNTS]

[SNORING]

Can you move over?

You're hogging the whole bed.

Hey, are you sure he made out a will?

I've seen it. I get everything.

Then all we gotta do is make it look like an accident.

Lots of things could happen on a farm.

Once a guy fell into a disc harrow.

sliced and diced.

Mm.

I like the way you think.

We should also put the land in my name

after we're married.

This way the buyers don't try and take advantage of a woman.

Speaking of women, what about your wife?

[CHUCKLES] I'm divorced.

Mm-hmm.

Then what's this for?

[SIGHS]

Well, I'm... I'm planning on being divorced.

Don't hold out on me, partner.

All right, I wasn't planning on it.

Well, not until tonight.

Then I met you, and...

Betty seemed like nothing.

I've never met a woman like you before.

Guys do find me kinda special.

I've got a certain maturity,

and experience.

We've got a lot to learn about each other.

It's gonna be fun.

Hey...

Could you hand me my nightgown, lover?

I want you to see this.

See what?

My sample case.

I'm going to quit my sales job, so you can have it all.

Look, you got your Queen Elizabeth II pattern here.

Princess Di, and for those hardy appetites...

The Fergie. [LAUGHS]

And you got all your accessories,

uh, shrimp forks, gravy ladles.

Oh, that's lovely, John,

but I really don't think we'll be needing it.

Oh, but look at this.

Isn't that a beauty?

I'm not really too crazy about silver.

Oh.

[KNIFE CLANKS] All right.

[CLANKING]

Do you still love me?

[EXHALES]

I love everything about you.

[SNIFFING]

I love the way you smell,

the way you taste.

You make me feel...

...hungry.

I mean, the more I have of you the hungrier I get,

the more I want.

Yes.

I do seem to have that effect on people.

[LOUD BANG]

[TED SCREAMING AND GRUNTING]

[GRUNTING]

I'n gonna kill you.

Witch!

[SCREAMING]

[SQUISHING]

[TED SCREAMING]

[GROANING]

[SCREAMING]

[SCREAMING AND MOANING]

[CHANTING]

[THUDS]

[GRUNTS]

He's dead.

JOHN: Oh, my God! What have I done?

It was self defense.

No jury in the world would convict you.

It was murder.

Oh, come on, John.

Don't wimp out on me now.

Put the body in the truck,

and we can go back to the farm.

But what if the police see the body and the blood?

Forget the police.

Look...

No crime to have a dead pig in your truck.

People eat 'em.

Turn 'em into bacon and stuff.

He wasn't calling you "bitch,"

it was "witch."

[CHANTING]

[GRUNTING]

Take it easy, big fellow.

Easy.

You were just over-excited, that's all.

Easy going, calm down.

[JOHN GRUNTING]

Drag the body out to the truck.

[SUSPENSEFUL MUSIC PLAYING]

[HUMMING]

[GASPING]

[DOOR UNLOCKS]

You bad boy.

What have you been up to?

Well, there was this...

big mud puddle out there, and I...

I got this sudden urge to splash around in it.

[CHUCKLING AND SNORTING]

[THEME MUSIC PLAYING]