Original subtitles

♪ Aha-ha

♪ Aha-ha

♪ Aha-ha

♪ Aha-ha

♪ I crossed the Mississippi

♪ Went searching for a sound

♪ Set fire tothe real nitty gritty ♪

♪ And my feetnever touched the ground ♪

♪ I turned it inside out

♪ Till I couldn't tellwhich way was down ♪

♪ MY whispers turned to shouts

♪ Now my feet don'ttouch the ground ♪

♪ My feet don'ttouch the ground ♪

♪ My feet don'ttouch the ground ♪

♪ Na-na-na-na-na-na-na

♪ Get higher

♪ Get higher

♪ Get higher

♪ Get higher

♪ Na-na-na-na-na-na-na

[ Laughing ]

You like my trail,huh?

Yourtrail?Yeah.

That's why I run itso much faster than you.

[ Both laugh ]

You look so familiar.

You know, from the nose up.

Well, you've been eating my dustfor -- what? -- like two weeks?

[ Laughs ]Right?

Yeah,we'll call it a tie, huh?

[ Chuckling ] Okay.

You go to the grocery storeon 2nd?

No,farmers' market guy.

I prefer my foodlike I like my women.

[ Both laugh ]What, hot and sweaty?

Organic and disease-free.

[ Laughing ] Oh, okay.

I'll, uh, show you mineif you show me yours.

Sure.Yeah?

Warehouse fire.

Right!Oh, my God.

Uh, you're with...19?

Yeah, yeah!I'm at 23.

Oh.

Oh.

Damn.This was going so well.

[ Laughs ]

[ Laughs ]

Theo. Ruiz.

Yeah, I'm Vic. Hughes.

[ Chuckles ]

Well, I'll see you tomorrow,Vic Hughes.

♪ Get higher

♪♪

♪ Yeah, yeah, yeah

I-I always dreamed of livinginside a Buca di Beppo,

and -- and now we do.

Carina is hangingall this to dry.

She says thatit reminds her of home.

What do I do with this?

I don't know.Throw a dinner party?

[ Sniffs ]

Oh, you like that one?

It's Basilio.

Pesto-flavored and madefrom unpasteurized sheep's milk.

Mmm.

Uh, we're gonna be late.

♪ Aha-ha

♪ Aha-ha

I love you!

♪ Aha-ha

♪ Aha-ha

I don't knowif I can do it.

Hmm?Treat Sullivanlike a probie.

I mean, the guy looks likehe came out of the womb

telling the doctorwhat to do.

Yeah, this is definitelygonna be weird.

I'm just glad I'm notthe new guy anymore.

Jack:Hey, hey, check it out.

Seattle Fire's new faceof professionalism --

custom 19 masks!

-Nice!-Ooh!-Huh?

Look at this.-Yeah, they're nice.

-Not bad, right?-Looks good, looks good.

-Yeah?-Very good.

These are gonnasave some lives right here.

Dude, we look likewe're in "Mortal Kombat."

[ All shouting ]

You guys look likeCharlie's Angels.

That's really cute.

Totally see that now.

Lieutenant.

Ah.Robert Sullivan.

You must be the [Chuckles]the new recruit.

Reporting for duty.

[ Sighs ]

How am I supposed tostay away from you

when I have to watch you

rescue kittens and childrenevery day?

[ Footsteps approach ]We --

We keep it professional.Shop talk.

Oh. Shop talk is howwe ended up married.

[ Laughs ]

Just, uh,two more months.

Justtwo more months,huh?

Mm.

Come on.

Probies can't be latefor lineup.

19!

[ Indistinct conversations ]

Want you to meetRobert Sullivan.

Yeah. Uh...

Thank you, guys, all of you,for having my back.

I really appreciate the supportfrom each and --

...from eachand every one of you.

I know it's weird,but it doesn't have to be.

You're used to seeing meas your boss,

and now I hope you'll see meas someone who's grateful

and honored to still be workingalongside you, so...

Probie Sullivanat your service.

[ Light laughter ]That had to hurt. Um...

A-A-A-And as isfirehouse tradition,

the last probiebreaks in the new probie.

Vic: Yeah, Captain,is it just me,

or do our probies just keepgetting older or --

Okay, you do not wantto finish that sentence.

Hey, hey, hey!Okay, okay.

Uh, you know, the ladder needsa -- a new coat of varnish.

Mm-hmm.So, uh, two coats.

Okay.Jack:And, uh, make sure to clean

deep between the seatsof the engine.

Pretty surethere's food in there

from your firstfirst day at 19.

[ Laughter ]

And -- And I hopeyou love plungin'.

'Cause t-the toiletsare clogged,

and you're gonna be...jamming it.

I can't do this.I am so sorry.Get it -- No --

Well, I'm glad you're allso enthused about chores

because today isa COVID cleaning party.

Herrera and Gibson,the apparatus.

Uh, Miller, the beanery.

Montgomery, the lounge.Hughes, the gym.

Sullivan --

-Uh-oh.-[ Laughs ]

Oh, no.

-[ Laughing ] Oh!-The floors.-Oh, no, no.

I-I can teach how to hold a mop,in case you forgot.[ Cellphone vibrates ]

Oh, thank you.So, come on,chop, chop, probie.

Chop, chop!

I need the aid car.

That's convenient timing.I just --

Marsha collapsed.I need the aid car.

♪♪

Warren.Go with Gibson.

Everyone, get to it.

♪♪

Missed you at my hearing,Miller.

Your, uh, knee okay?

Knee's notwhy I missed it.

Nari: Hi, honey.

Mom. Mom, Mom, Mom!

Put the phonein front of you.

Oh!

[ Chuckles ]

I'll neverget used to this.

Wait a minute, Mom.Where are you?

In the car.

At the grocery store.

Can you see?

Mom, what are you doingat the grocery store?

I just need gochujang.

I'm making spicy tofu.

I can put it in Tupperwarefor you if you wantto come get some.

Mom, you are supposed to bestaying home.

If you need gochujang,I can go pick it up for you.

You just have to tell me.

Your dad is golfing.

If he can golf,I can shop.

Dad's golfing?

I want to get in and out before it gets crowded.

I'll talk to you later.

Love you!

[ Cellphone beeps ]

Golfing?

♪♪

Marsha?You did a good job,okay?

Marsha, can you, uh --

Right now you needto put your mask on.

Can you hear me?[ Marsha coughs ]

She's hot.Sats are low.

Hey, Marcus, uh,has she been in contact

with anyonethat's been sick lately?

I-I'm sorry.I'll explain in a minute, okay?

He can't read the lipswith the masks on.

You think this is COVID?

I think we need to get herto Grey-Sloan right now.

[ Coughs ]

♪♪

[ Line ringing][ Indistinct shouting ]

This is Inara. Please leave a message.

[ Beep]

Hey. Um, sorry to leaveanother message.

I-I just wanted to let you knowthat I have Marcus with me,

and, uh...

just call me back.

[ Indistinct talking ]

He's right over here.In fact, the boy lives with her.

So, she's headed tothe COVID ward.

Are you sure, man?Because --

She has all the symptoms.

It could just be flu, but wehave to treat it like it's not

until we getthe tests back.

And we'll keep you posted.

Whoa, whoa, hey.Hunt. Hunt.

Look, thesetwo need tests.

[ Sighs ]

Warren, I can only give themto symptomatic patients.

Hunt, look.They're the only family she has.

[ Sighs ]

They're myfamily, too.

Come on, Hunt.

Please?

Hey. You? Over here.

Warren needstwo COVID tests.

We have some left over from whenwe did employee testing, so...

Yeah.

Hey.Dixon?

Yeah.What are you doing here?

Well, I'm volunteering.

Just, uh, wait right here,

and I'll be backwith the tests, okay?

I-It's for these tworight here.

Okay.

She refusedto wear a mask.

Every excuse in the book.Said they were uncomfortable.

Now she's looking ata ventilator being shoveddown her throat.

Why don't you, um,take the aid car back,

and, uh, I'll wait herewith Marcus?

Okay. Just -- Just callif you need a ride, alright?

Thanks.

No, it's --No, it's fine.

We just -- We just need to goand get tests, okay?

[ Loud thudding ]

You alright, Montgomery?

Yeah. Why --Why wouldn't I be alright?

Well, it looks like you're going10 rounds on that recliner.

Well, that's how you clean it,probie.

Chief probie.

Still working.Come back in 30.

Alright.

Hey, uh, is there a problembetween us, Miller?

I said come back in 30,probie.

[ Klaxons sound ]

Dispatch: Aid Car 19.

Suspected head injury, struck by a baseball.

Marsha?COVID.

-Aw, damn it.-No.

I'm gonna goburn this uniform.

Uh, keys, Warren.

You might wantto sanitize those.

[ Klaxons continue ]

[ Siren wailing ]

[ Sighs ]

My mom'sat the grocery store.

And my dad is golfing!

Oh. And you're yelling at mebecause...?

Becausemy dad's not golfing.

Oh. Right.

Honestly, I don't knowwhat makes me more mad.

The closeted gay sex,the cheating on my mom,

or the putting othersat risk.

Do you...

You thinkyour mom knows?

That my dad's cruising for guysonline and calling it golfing?

I --Dear God, I hope not.

Are you gonna tell her?

Why would I tell her?

If my husband were screwingaround, I would want to know.

"Hey, Mom, how you doing?

[ Sniffs ]Smells good in here.

Uh, quick FYI.

Dad's been secretlyplaying with penises

outside of your marriage,and --"

Oh, my God, why would I say"playing with penises"

in referencing my father?!

I -- I don't know whyyou would eversay that.

♪♪

[ Siren wailing ]

[ Brakes hiss ]

[ Radio chatter ]

Do unto your neighbors asyou would have them do unto you!

Oh, fun. Church.

Vic:Ma'am, are you alright?

We received a call aboutsomeone being struck

by a -- by a baseball.

You want me to call the copsevery time

you get in a fightwith your ugly husband, huh?!

Hey, ma'am! Ma'am!We're not the police.

I still don'twant you here!

Okay, we're actually fromthe Seattle Fire Department.

Can you please put this on?

God protects us!

Yep, God protects uswith masks!

Ma'am, we got a callabout a head injury.

Can you tell uswhat happened?

Yeah, I got drunknine months ago

and had sexwith my loser husband!

That's what happened!

Eddie, try not to be sucha bitch baby your whole life!

Alright, Bishop,this is Aid Car 19.

We're gonna needsome backup here.

Ugh!Maya: Copy. Do we need PD?

No. I'd prefer to de-escalateif we can.

Ma'am --Stay away from me!

O-Okay, okay. Okay.I'm pregnant!

Okay.Yep, we can see that.

Did you want another cigaretteand beer, or are you good?

♪♪

Hey, ma'am!Ma'am, we're here to --

♪ Jesus loves me, this, I know We're here to help you,

so if you could just calm down,we can check you out.

♪ For the Bibletells me so! ♪

Shut up, Gina,you crazy bitch!

Hey, that's not helping!

I-I-I am callingmy husband

and I am telling himwhat you called me!

-Please don't do that.-Come on, lady! Shut up!

Eddie!Answer your damn phone, asshat!

Fill me in.Vic:Uh, she's pregnant,

possibly high,possibly drunk,

more likelya mental-health issue,

or, you know...all of it.

There's a husband in the housealready, apparently injured.

Warren and Hughes, go inside,check on the husband.

Montgomery, can youstand by the door,

make sure she doesn'tgo back inside?

Copy.Did you call PD?

Well, she's pregnant.

I'm rooting for her babynot to be born in prison.

Eddie,answer your damn phone!

Ohh!Hey! Hey, hey, hey!

Call PD.Okay.

[ Laughs ]

Ah, yeah,that's broken.

[ Laughs ]

[ Knock on door ]

Ben: Eddie?[ Grunts ]

Stupid...

Eddie?

I'm in here!

[ Door closes ]

Hey, Eddie. I'm Ben.This is Vic.

-Hey.-Hi, Vic.

We're here to help.

Sh-She gets so mad.

I mean,she gets so mad.

It's -- It's likeshe's possessed.

Okay,you mind putting this on?

E-Eddie, Eddie,you're bleeding.

Okay,and -- and, well...

you got a needledangling from your face,

and I want to get it out,but, you know,

I need you to puton the mask first.

Thank you.

I didn't touch her, man!Okay. Alright.

I didn't even touch her.

Warren. Warren.

♪♪

[ Sniffs ]

Ugh!

Is it crack?Or meth.

[ Laughs ]So stupid.

[ Groans ]

[ Off-key ]♪ Amazing grace

♪ How sweet the song

♪ That saveda wench like me ♪

Herrera, what's the statuson PD?Herrera: Stand by.

Hey, you can't arrest me.I'm pregnant.

My baby is innocent.

You should'vethought of that

before you assaulteda first responder.

Oh.

[ Groans ]

Gina?

Son of a --Gina, are you in pain?

God, does it sound likeI'm singing?

Honestly, it's hardto tell the difference.

Okay, Gina, you should reallyget in the ambulance

so we can help you.

No, I'm not getting in there.You drive sick people in there.

It's sanitized.I'm not getting in there!

I'm going in my house!Well, ma'am --

Move!I'm not gonna move!

I'm not gonna move,because I don't want to see you

hit your husbandwith that bat

and your innocentchild of God babybe born in jail.

Please calm down.

Please.

Gina.Hey.

Okay.

Oh, come on!

Honestly,I hate her guts.

I might evenhate her baby.

[ Indistinct talking ]

Oh, no, no, no.Easy.

Nice of youto help out here.

Yeah, well, I always likedthe medical part of the gig.

It wasthe running into fires

and being held at gunpointthat I didn't love.

[ Chuckles ] Yeah.Yeah, I get that.

Okay.

Alrighty, here we go.

No, no, it's fine.

Just tip your head back,okay?

Alright.

And you're done.

Okay.

That's it.

Results normally takea few days,

but, uh, Hunt fast-tracked themfor you, so...

Seems wrong to fast-trackduring a pandemic.

Well, it is.

I'm not judging.I'm just being honest.

But, uh,I don't blame you.

You got to do what you got to dofor family, right?

Right.

So your dad, uh,is back with the PD, huh?

Yeah.

And I only found outat Sullivan's hearing.

Family dinners kind offell to the wayside

when Alicia and Ibroke up.

Yeah, how's she doing?

She, uh...she's okay.

I mean, she was blindsided,heartbroken.

There's no nice wayto tell someone who loves you

that you love her, too,but just as a friend.

Right.

♪♪

[ Sighs ]

Ooh.

PD issick of this couple.

What?Yeah, these folksare frequent fliers.

PD's coming, but they don't seemto be in any kind of hurry.

Okay,can you guard the front?

Just direct them this waywhen they get here.

I would argue,but it stinks in here.

-Right?-Yeah.

Hey, stop bleedingon my stuff, man!

Ah, how very Christianof you, Gina.

God helps thosewho help themselves.

We're in a pandemic.I don't need your germs in here.

[ Groans ]

What's -- What --Are you having contractions?

It -- It's justthose Toni Braxton thingies.

Braxton Hicks?Yeah.

Okay.Or she's just kicking a lot.

Oh, so you'rehaving a girl?

Ohh, yeah, my third,God help me.

Where areyour other kids?

My bitch mothertook 'em.

She's a realpiece of work.

[ Laughs ] I bet.

Ohh! Son of a --

What's happening?

Ohh!Gina.

No, no, no, no,not right now.

[ Liquid trickles ]Gina?

Ugh!

My stupid waterjust broke!

[ Scoffs ]

Eddie? Eddie! Eddie!

I need you to sit downand put on the mask.

♪♪

Where's Gina?

We're taking care of her,Eddie, okay?

A little, um, a little fresh aircan't hurt, right?

Am I still bleeding?Yeah, hold on.

I'm not gonna hurt you.I'm not the police.

I just want to mask youand stop the bleeding, okay?

[ Groaning ]

Okay, Eddie, Eddie,I need you to stop moving.

So, you guysfight like this a lot?

I didn't saywe were fighting.

Well, she hit youwith a baseball, Eddie,

and from the looks of that lac,I'd say it was a fastball, huh?

[ Gina screams ]Gina?!

Eddie,I need you to stay still.

[ Gina screams ]Gina!

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie --Eddie, sit down!Sit down!

♪♪

What part of "Come back in 30"don't you understand, probie?

It's been 40.

Look, Miller, ifthere's something youhave to say, say it.

You're not the boss of me, man.I don't got to answer to you.

Hey, Gina, it's --I think it's time totake you to the hospital.

Get off of me!

I labored for 15 hourswhen my water broke last time!

I'm Wonder Woman!

Hey, even Wonder Womanrides in an ambulanceonce in a while, Gina.

Come on.No, get away from me!

Hey!

Okay, you can'thave a baby in here.

There's nothing cleanin here.

Herrera, we're gonna needclean blankets

and a gurneyin the garage now.

Herrera: Copy.Ooh!Okay, okay, I'll go.

Okay. Thank you.Oh, thank God!

Come on.[ Groans ]

No.

No! Don't push.

Don't push, Gina![ Grunting ]

Holy crap!

Oh!Ow!

Okay,baby in my hands!What?!

Baby in my hands.

[ Baby crying ]

You're trying to keep meaway from my wife.

You're trying to keep meaway from my wife,

and I didn't doanything wrong.No, no, no, Eddie.

Eddie, you got tolisten to me, okay?I didn't do anything wrong.

Okay, we just have to stopthe bleeding from your face

so you can see your wifeand your baby, okay?

You can't bleed onyour little, tiny baby, right?

My -- My --My -- My baby?

My ba--My baby's coming?!It's okay,it's okay, it's okay!

Sounds like it's coming, Eddie,but you want to be ready, right?

You want to be ready,so let me do this.

-I want to be a good dad.-Yeah.

I-I really wantto be a good dad.

I want to be a better dadthan my dad was to me!

And you canbe, and wanting tois half the battle, alright?

But we just need to stopthe bleeding now, okay?

Gina: Eddie,where the hell are you?!Gina!

Eddie, Eddie,stay still, stay still.

If I'm not out therewhen that baby comes, she'll --

Eddie, calm down! Now!S-She'll kill me!

I'm serious!Okay.

Gina: Eddie!Gina!

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie!

Hey!

Warren, you okay?

I'm fine.Stop him, Hughes.

Okay.

Damn!

Hi. I'm Captain Bishop,and I don't hate you.

[ Door opens ]-Eddie!-That's my kid!

Eddie, Eddie, Eddie,stop, stop, stop, stop, stop!

-Stop.-Stop!-Hey, hey!

Unh!

Eddie!Get off me!That's my kid!

That's my kid!Eddie!!

Is it Marsha?She has it?

We don't know yet.It'll be a few hours beforewe get the results back.

Is she awake?

Barely.

[ Inhales sharply ]Oh, God.

Hey, it'll be okay.Just -- Just take a breath.

I can't take a breath,Jack.

We might have COVID and we haveto find a place to stay, and --

What?

If Marsha dies, we have to findsomewhere else to go.

Hey. Hey, hey. Hey.

Take ita step at a time.

I amtaking itone step at a time, Jack.

I'm a single motherof a deaf child

who's still runningfrom a psycho ex-husband.

We have no ideawhat Marsha will even do --

Her son's been calling.She hasn't been answering,but he's been calling.

What if he takes overthe apartment?

I mean, I have to think aboutwhere we're gonna live.

If that happens,you can stay with me.

Ted can trace you to me.

We don't even knowif she has it, okay?

She refused to wear a mask,Jack! Of course she has it!

[ Gasps ]

[ Sighing ] Oh, God.

I'm such an ass.I'm so sorry.

You're not an ass.You --

You're scared.

Okay? You're just scared.

[ Sighs ]

Like everyone else.We're all scared.

[ Voice breaking ] I really wishI could hug you right now.

Yeah,I wish you could, too.

♪♪

No, it's okay, buddy.

Uh, we just need to --

we just needto get your mom a test.

We're gonna take thisstep by step, okay?

♪♪

I'm sorry.I-I didn't mean to hit her.

Whether you meant to or not,you're going to jail.

He needs rehab,not jail.

He's too stupid for jail.He'll never survive.

I just wantto hold my baby.

Not happening.

I'm not letting anyonetake this one.

Not my mom.Not that fool I married.

Gina, that sounds like the startto some excellent parenting.

Montgomery, you and Herreratake the aid car.

Get her to Seattle Pres.

Wait, is that your bloodor mine?

Oh. Might be mine.

Okay.

You okay?

Yeah. He didn't meanto hit me.

Great. He can say thatin court.

Up.

I can't go to jail, man.I just -- I just had a baby.

For what it's worth, his wifeneeds to go to jail, too.

She hit a baseball at his headwith a bat.

God, I'm so stupid.I'm so stupid.

No, you're not. You're notstupid, Eddie. You're j--

Oh, my face hurts too muchto finish that sentence.

Aah.You have the rightto remain silent.

Anything you say canand will be used against you

in a court of law.He's a littlestupid.

You have the rightto attorney.

[ Siren wailing ]

♪ Hush, little mija,don't you cry ♪

♪ Papa is gonna buy youa pumpkin pie ♪

♪ And ifthat pumpkin pie -- ♪

"Papa's gonna buy yousome pumpkin pie"?

[ Laughs ]

That's what my dadused to sing.

Ahh.

I've been so mad at him.

So mad at my mom for their lies,for the pain.

But seeing this,my God, this baby.

What chancedoes she have?

Two parentswho hate each other.

Drugs, alcohol, misery.

[ Sighs ]

What's gonnabecome of her?

My dad did okay.

And I guess my momkinda did okay, too,

'cause she knew betterthan to stay.

♪♪

Does this crazy lady reallyget to keep this baby, Travis?

Yeah.

Yeah,she probably does.

♪♪

[ Hiss, whirring ]

I miss all the fun?

Not much.

I delivered a baby.Montgomery's nose almost broke.

Warren crash-landedinto a pile of dishes.

And Hughes got clockedby a crackhead.

Oh. You hit him back,at least?

In the sensethat her face hit his fist.

[ Laughs ]

Lookin' good, 19!

Nobody askedfor your approval, probie.

What's the problem,Miller?

You.

Yeah, I gathered that.

You reached a levelmost Black firefighters

will never sniff,let alone see.

And what do you dowith all that success?

Everythingthey thinkwe do.

We have to work twice as hardjust to be considered.

Well, that's not exclusiveto firefighters.

You don't give two crapsabout making it harder

for every other Blackfirefighter coming up after you!

Don't assume what I didor did not give a crap about!

Don't you thinkI'm sorry?

You don't think I knowwhat I did?

No, I think you knew exactlywhat you did.

You just did it anyway.

I stole drugs becauseI'm an addict, Miller.

You have no idea whatit feels like to need a drug.

You don't know my pain.Everybody hereknows the pain of the job.

Only one person stole drugsand lied about it.

I'm notpatting you on the back.

I remember you at the academy,all high and mighty,

constantly preachingabout integrity.

You pushed meto be better,

and now you're justa lying, drug-stealing thief

with a free passto do it again.

I was injured, Miller!

And you're about to beinjured again, Robert,

if you don'tget out of my face.

Guys, guys, guys.

I already got my ass kickedonce today,

but I swear I will stand betweenyou if you try to play this out.

Think about where you are,okay?

People are watching you.

♪♪

[ Shower water running ]

Yo, Miller, uh...[ Water sloshes ]

you're carrying this Sullivanthing around like an anchor.

It's pulling youdown.

Can't hear you.

You ever stop to considerwhat he'scarrying?

Riding mighty highon that horse, aren't you?

[ Metal squeaks,shower water stops ]

Don't talk down to me,Warren.

He lied.

So did you.

He made mistakes.

So did I.

Mistakes?

We got to constantly think aboutwhat neighborhood we're in,

what we're wearing, what we say,how we sound.

We don't get the luxuryof mistakes.

Sullivan knew better. Youknew better.

You're right.

You're right.

Everything you just saidis spot-on.

[ Water sloshes ]

Look, all I can offeris this.

If -- If Dixon screws up,it's on Dixon.

He's a --He's a bad apple.

But if Sullivan screws up,

that's on everyBlack firefighter in Seattle.

Sound fair to you?No.

That's exactly my point.

Just the waythe world works.

Yeah. It is.

That doesn't meanthat youhave to.

♪♪

[ Door opens ]

[ Door closes ]

[ Grunts ]

[ Exhales deeply ]

Captain doesn'tstack hoses.

[ Chuckles ] Only one personallowed in the gym at a time.

I'm making do.

[ Exhales deeply ]

That family.

They, uh, they remind youof the mess you grew up with?

Nah. No.

My dad raged and threw things,but only at the walls.

Never at us and neverin front of the neighbors.

I'm afraid to go home.

To Carina?No.

God, no.Carina's a salve.

It's me. I'm afraidof how much I'm like my dad.

My brother and I chose

such opposite waysof dealing with him.

Mason buried his headin the sand, like my mom,

and me, I just wantedto please him.

[ Sighs ] I made myselfinto a perfect copy of my dad

so that he wouldn't finda reason to be mad at me.

I spent so many years

learning how to readhis sighs and silences,

the hunchof his shoulders.

So many years mimickingthe tone of his voice.

I'm scared thatby protecting myself fromhim,

I turned myself intohim.

You arenothing like him.

And for my 13th birthday,

I was allowed to havethree friends spend the night.

I didn't havethree close friends,

but some girls fromthe softball team came over,

and we hung outin the basement.

We painted nailsand talked about first kisses,

and I pretended likeI only liked boys.

[ Both laugh ]

And this one girl,Holly,

she went to the kitchenduring the movie,

and she came back with a soda,and I freaked out.

I asked her where she got thatbecause those were my dad's

and no one else was allowedto touch those.

And Holly shruggedbecause she was 13

and it wasa can of soda.

[ Panting ]

And then, sure enough,a few minutes later,

my dad cametearing down the stairs.

"Who drank my last soda?"

[ Exhales deeply ]

I can still feel every musclein my body tensing up.

And Holly was terrified.

And he pointed his finger at herand he said,

"Who saidyou could drink that?"

And she juststared at him,

suddenly, this --this tiny, little girl.

And he camelumbering over to her,

and he ripped the canout of her hand.

And he went back upstairs.

And she called her mom,crying,

and her mom cameand picked her up.

This morning,I woke up in the apartment,

and I looked around it.

Her cheeses and her pastas andall of her wonderful everything,

and I could feel the ragebuilding inside of me.

I could feel the"Who drank my last Coke?" rage.

Because I'm so used tohaving control

over every last inchof my space.

And now she's here,and...

it's terrifying.

I am terrified thatI am gonna snap at her like him

and that she is gonnastop loving me and...

Am I broken?

Look, I'm still workingon this one myself, Maya,

but I think being afraidto be like your dad

is the first stepto not being like him.

[ Knock on door ]

[ Indistinct talking on TV ]

Hey.Any news?

Uh, well, I checked inwith Hunt, and, uh...

Marsha tested positivefor COVID.

I'm sorry.I'm so sorry.

But the good news isthat all three of youcame back negative.

Okay.

At least that's --that's good.

Yeah.

So, uh, what now?

Well, they watch herfor the next 24 hoursin the COVID ward,

and, uh, well, you won't be ableto visit her, except remotely.

Um...

I'm sorry, man.I wish I had better news.

Thank you.Oh, um...

[ Chuckles ]I swiped you these.

Uh, I know you said Marcus can'tread lips with the masks,

and, uh, well, the hospitalgot a shipment of these in

after a deaf doctorconsulted.

They're pretty cool.

Not pretty cool, man.

These are --These are game-changing.

Thank you.

No problem.

♪♪

[ Door closes ]

♪♪

Mm.

How's the jaw?

[ Laughs ]Yeah, I'll live.

Plus, it adds to my street cred,you know?

[ Groans ]How's the nose?

Uh, I don't thinkit's broken.

[ Laughs ]It hurts, though.

I mean, I knowthat this job is dangerous,

but getting beat upby a pregnant Christian woman

is notsomething I expected.

[ Laughs ]

It's a charming couple.

[ Chuckling ] Yeah.

Yeah.

[ Sniffs ]

They'll be forgiven,though.

Right?

They'll go to churchand confess their sins.

[ Sniffs ]You know, they...

[ Sniffs ]

They beat each other,they torture each other,

they -- they're crueland they're violent.

They drinkwhile they're pregnant.

They do drugs,they lie,

they cheat and they stealand they abuse their kids.

[ Sniffs ]

And they're just...forgiven.

But if Iwent to church

and I talked about the deep lovethat I have for my husband

and the profound waysthat he changed me

and my lifeand my heart...

If I, uh...

If I admit all thatand then I don't repent?

Well, I'm not goingto heaven, right?

♪♪

I get to go to hell.

[ Sniffles ]

I get to go to hellfor who and how I love.

♪♪

That's whatmy dad's up against.

[ Sniffs ]

That's whathe's buying into.

♪♪

[ Motor whirring,running footsteps ]

Only one allowedat a time.

That's what Seattle Fireused to say about us.

[ Beep, whirring slows ]

I knowwhat you're carrying.

We all carry it.

We share the burden.

But you dropped your corner

and you left itup to the rest of us.

Yeah, you have no ideawhat I've carried.

[ Grunts ]

I spent two of the worst yearsof my life in Montana

after my wife died.

Small station,

all white firefighters,except me.

I absorbed hundreds of theseracial jokes from them.

"Look at that monkeyracing up that ladder."

I had a thousand fantasiesabout swinging on them.

But you know what?I never did.

I sucked it up.

I bit it back.

And when I couldn'tdo it anymore,

I put in for a transfer.

We've allexperiencedthat crap.Because if I threw that punch,

I make myself exactlywhat they think I am.It only provesthat things haven't changed,

and it doesn'texcuse your behavior.And I'm over here

and I'm supposed to justtake the same crap from you?

Comparing me to racists now?It's not the same.

It feelsthe same!

You know, Miller,you may have walked in my shoes,

but we haven't traveledthe same distance.

We back to drugs now?

No, I'm talking aboutthe silver spoon stuckbetween your ears.

Pull it out, and maybeyou'll be ready to listen.

I don't have to tell youwhat it's like to be Black.

And you have rank over me,so you can yell all you want.

Just know one thing.

Us fighting isexactly what they want.

I'm not fighting you.

I just don't have timefor your excuses.

♪♪

I'll be backwhen you're done.

♪♪

[ Crickets chirpingin distance ]

I literally spent hourscleaning this entire room,

and you've covered itin salmonella in 15 minutes.

Well, some peoplewrite symphonies,

but Vic Hughes makes messes,you know?

♪♪

Hughie?

Hughes. Hughie, Hughie.

Hmm?You're --

Sorry. Sorry.Uh...

[ Both laugh ]I, uh...

Whew! I haven't been touchedin, like, a really long time.

Yeah, very,very long time.

Yeah.Yeah.

Miller,you know I get it, right?

I get why you're so upsetwith Sullivan.

[ Sighs ]

I've been writingstrongly worded letters to him

in my head for weeks,but --

Let me guess. You thinkI should give him a break?

No, I didn't -- N-No.

No, don't -- You don't needto give anyone a break.

No one's given youone.

But I do think you shouldprove yourself wrong

and become the nextBlack Battalion Chief.

Come over tomorrow.

To your place?Yes.

So we can look overthe Lieutenant packet.

And Pru wouldlove to see you.

♪ Mm-hmm, mm-hmm

♪ I knowthat it feels like hope ♪

♪ Mm-hmm, mm-hmm ♪ Has come and gone

♪ Whoa

♪ Mm-hmm, mm-hmm

♪ Soon, the winds...

Whatever we can do to help,you just let us know.

♪ It won't be long

Marsha: Don't forget to water my plants.

I promise we won't.

Where is he?

Oh!

♪ Mm-hmm

[ Laughs ]

♪ One day, I know

♪ We're gonna rise up

What if I stay herefor a while?

I mean,just until she came back.

♪ Rise up, rise up

♪ Steady we climb

♪ Straight to the sky

♪ We're gonna rise up

♪ Whoa-oh-oh

Hey.

Uh, I-I can come back.

No, no, no.I'm -- I'm -- I'm done.

The water's warm, so...

Good.Um, I just had the...

the worst first shift.

Um...Do you want totalk to me about it?

No, no, I'm good.I just need, uh -- I just...

Come on.

♪ Only God

O-Okay, after Montana,

this was the first placethat felt safe.

So I thought coming back herewas gonna be like coming home.

I mean, I knew thatbeing a probie would be hard,

but I thought the hardest partwas gonna be cleaning toilets.

[ Sighs ]

Or -- Or watching youin a towel.

I just --This Miller thing is just --

He's overreacting.

No, he's right!That's the problem.

He -- Everything he saysis right.

Look, my dad always used to say, "A lo hecho, pecho."

"What's done is done."Mm-hmm.

You can't changewhat you did, Robert.

You can only changewhat you do now,

and you're doingeverything you canto make things right.

You're putting upwith our crappy jokes.

You threw yourselfinto probie work.

Oh, and I knowyou had to mop the floors

outside your old office,and that had to suck.

Mm.

But you are...

amazing.

And brave.

And resilient.

And I'm gonna needanother shower

if I have to stand hereany longer.

♪ We will rise up

[ Chuckles ]

Two more months.

♪ We're gonna make it through

Two more months.[ Exhales deeply ]

♪ Gonna rise up

♪ To the darkest night

♪ Gonna rise

♪ Yes, we will

♪ Yes, we will

♪ Gonna rise up

♪ Oh-ohh

♪ Oh, we're gonna riiiiiise up

Hey.

Unh-unh-unh-unh-unh.Shower first.

Seriously?

Bella.

[ Sighs ]

Okay, I'm sorry,

but what is with our kitchenbecoming a cheese cellar?

It reminds me of home.

Yeah, I know. You said that,but it is starting --

Maya, my home isreally scary right now.

It's worse than here, and --and here is really bad.

I'm --I'm scared for my dad.

He was never the oneto follow the rules,

and -- and I cannot be thereto take care of him

and to make sure that he doeswhat he's supposed to.

So, um...

It feels good to look up

a-and to be reminded of -- of --of the good memories of Italy

instead ofthe constant fear and worry.

I'm sorry.

You don't have to be.

Gotta go get readyto bring some babies

into thisterrifying world.

I did that today.

You did what?

I brought a babyinto this terrifying world.

You did?

I mean, brought...

Maybe --Maybe more like caught.

Tell me everything.

Well,first I'm gonna shower,

and then I will tell youall about it,

naked, in bed.

No. [ Laughing ] No.Maya.

Paul: Good boy.

♪♪

Dad!

Travis.

Well, that looks painful.You okay?

Yeah, I-I'll live.

Your mom's inside.

Come on.Dad.

♪ It's time

"There is neitherJew nor Greek,

there is neitherbond nor free,

there is neithermale nor female,

for ye are all onein Christ Jesus."

Galatians 3:28.

♪ Now I'm on my own

I saw your profile, Dad.

♪ Now I'm on my own

I know.

I h--[ Chuckling ] I don't know --

Yeah.

Actually, I'm...too tiredto have this conversation today.

♪ This is freedom

I'm just gonna getsome spicy tofu.

♪♪

♪ Freedom

♪ Freedom

♪♪

♪ Oh, freedom

♪ Ohhh, freedom

♪ Ohhh-oh, freedom

--Captions by VITAC--

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪

♪♪