Original subtitles

[A rat squeaking, a deer running, a dog barking, a wolf howling...]

C'mon guys, hurry up.

I'm starving.

Oi Moony!

Try and keep up will ya!

I'm coming!

I'm coming, okay.

Have we lost Wormtail?

That was fun!

Is that the last of them Moony?

Until next month.

That's a shame.

It's not a shame Peter.

I always have fun!

C'mon Moony.

Chin up!

It's nearly breakfast.

[inaudible chatter]

Alohamora.

So I was talking to this guy Caleb,

a Slytherin,

wants me to go to...

Hello.

Oh!

Have you heard?

What?

Alice asked Frank to the ball!

She asked him?

Mm-hmm! [yes]

And did he say 'yes'?

Of course he said 'yes' they're in love!

Uh, James!

Alright Evans.

Did you hear about McGonagall?

What's the old bat done now?

Don't call her that.

You should hear what Sirius calls her.

I don't want to.

Lots of cat-related puns.

Anyway, she's on 'leave'.

Slughorn reckons it's orders from Dumbledore.

I don't know why you keep on tailing that bloke.

I'm not tailing him.

You and that club.

Have you given him any more pet fish recently?

Oh shut up!

Oh wait, I can see Archie!

I'll catch you up.

Point is, while she's gone

we're the first port of call for the younger Gryffindors...

I could have sworn he said they were hinkypunks...

Ah, Potter, Evans!

What do you think?

But you escaped the shack, and we were chasing you

and then Prongs zoomed onto that path

and then you threw him off, and went for Padfoot like

grrrrr

Is that right?

And then you ran off into the forest,

and we couldn't find you

but then you howled really loudly like

hwooooooooo

Yeah yeah, we were all there Wormy.

hwooo...

Someone's looking rather cheerful this morning.

What?

Oh.

Evans.

You two do seem quite cosy, nowadays.

Yeah, it's nice, actually

You know, we talk.

Relate, as individuals...

Sounds riveting.

Head Boy and Head Girl.

I think it's sweet.

It's not sweet!

I wasted 2 years of my life

watching Prongs repeatedly fail to get a date.

I didn't fail, I just--

Just got bat-bogey hexed about a dozen times...

Anyway...

Lily and I are friends now

and it is great.

And that is that.

Unless, of course, she

hinted anything to you, or...?

Merlin Prongs!

Alright, alright, I'm just joking!

I'm sure we'll all be loners this Valentine's Day.

Not all of us!

Oh Remus...?

No, I...

No, I... I... I've got a date!

You're joking!

Wait, what?

Her name is Olivia and she's a 5th year Hufflepuff.

How'd you know her Peter?

I met her in Herbology club.

Herbology has a club?

She kept catching my eye over the fanged geraniums.

There's been more attacks.

Mmm, really?

3 muggles dead,

and 2 muggle-born witches.

God it never ends, does it?

Terrible.

Do you remember that guy I was telling you about?

Caleb, the Slytherin bloke?

Well after not speaking to me for 2 weeks

he has the nerve to ask me to the ball tonight

can you believe that?

Really?

What?

Everything that's going on

and that's what you're worried about?

It's not like I'm the only one.

What's that supposed to mean?

"Oh James and I are just getting on so well at the moment"

"We're just such good friends!"

We are!

If you like him so much why don't you just ask him out?

Well, maybe I'll ask him at the dance tonight.

Sure you will...

I will!

Like I said, sure you will!

I guess that means you've spoken to Severus then?

I've been meaning to, I just...

Well, what am I supposed to say?

I mean, what difference is it going to make?

I don't know.

You're the one who was so keen for him not to find out.

I know!

I know. I just...

I'll talk to him today, okay?

I'll see you later.

Alright, Evans.

Coming to the library, Remus?

Yeah, I'll catch you up.

Hi Lily!

Hi!

James, uh, what do people usually wear?

You know, to the dance?

Oh, uh, like, Dress Robes, I think.

Remus?

Can I borrow some of yours?

I'll help you pick out what to wear,

don't worry.

Remus!

Do you think you could talk to Lily for me?

Talk to her?

Like...

see if she's interested?

James, I don't think that's a good idea.

C'mon Moony.

Yeah c'mon Moony!

Don't be an idiot Moony.

Look at how pathetic he looks Moony!

C'mon, it's Valentine's Day...

Alright! Alright, fine.

I will talk to her.

Brilliant!

But no promises, okay?

Thanks, Remus!

Maybe I should get a haircut.

D'you think I should get a haircut?

Get rid of the lot, I'd say.

God, I hate Transfiguration.

Have you got the Emeric Switch book?

Uh... yes.

Thanks.

Doesn't make much more sense than the Gamp,

to be honest.

I should've taken Muggle Studies.

Now that wouldn't have been very fair, would it?

You okay?

Fine.

Want some...?

No.

Thanks.

Did you, er, see James this morning?

Yeah.

What about him?

Nothing.

He seemed fine when I spoke to him.

I'm sure he was...

It's just it's difficult for him, y'know, at this time of year.

Lost love, and all that.

Oh don't!

He's practically pining.

Remus, you're such a traitor!

Anyway, if he's that bothered about it

why doesn't he just ask me himself?

I think he's afraid of being called a...

what was your phrase again?

a "slimy, arrogant, stinking, wretched..."

"toerag!" "toerag!"

Shhhhh!

Well, it was true at the time.

...and is it true now?

Listen.

It's Valentine's Day.

I'm sure everything will have worked itself out

by this evening.

"It's Valentine's Day"

That's what she said?

Quit tempting him, Moony.

You're only gonna get his heart broken

poor lad.

I'm not tempting anybody.

All I'm saying...

...is that if...

...James did have feelings for Lily which were...

...more than Platonic

then they might not be met with

as much hostility as--

🎶 Gimme me a witch, in combat boots 🎶

Ahah!

🎶We'll get hitched, in combat boots 🎶

James, uh...

Which of these looks better?

Reckon that's your best look Wormy.

Sirius,

get a hobby.

It's too late now isn't it?

The dance is starting in a few hours

and I don't even know where to find her.

Merlin!

The pinacle of all our wizarding achievements

and all we use that thing for anymore

is stalking Lily-fucking-Evans.

And you're sure, Remus?

She's not just going to hex me again?

I'd say that was highly unlikely.

Brilliant!

I knew she'd come round eventually.

Sweet ghost of Merlin's bollocks, not again.

So, uh,

why haven't you got a date Sirius?

More fun to mess with other people's.

Ooh, did you restock?

What've we got?

Oh, you know, just 57 of

Zonko's finest Dungbombs Extraordinaire.

Are you sure that's going to be enough?

Ah!

I found her James.

Just... keep an eye on her, will you.

Hey look!

Snivellus is all alone.

What do you reckon we go pay him a visit?

Not today, Sirius.

"Not today, Sirius."

How do I look?

Ridiculous.

You'd look better like this!

Where is she now?

Um...

I see her.

Where is she?

Alright, loverboy!

She's... in the Middle Courtyard, James!

Great!

Thanks, Peter.

Oi!

Evans!

Dammit...

Hey - Lily, Lily, Lily!

Look, now's not a great time.

Really? Cos I think it's about time, actually.

Look, James, can this please wait?

I really need to say this.

James!

Look I don't want to be friends with you anymore!

What?

Y'know, well, I guess I'm kind of going out on a limb here

cos...

I was hoping that you wouldn't want to be

friends with me, either.

Look all I'm trying to say is...

Lily Evans...

Will you go to the dance with me?

What the hell is wrong with you James?!

It had to be here, didn't it?

In front of...

...in front of everyone.

Oh Lily, come on, calm down...

Well you know what? I'm not gonna be another

excuse for you to show off!

C'mon Lily calm down!

I'm sorry can we just talk about this for a second or...?

I said forget it!

Did you, er,

see my additions to those Death Eater flyers

in the third floor corridor?

"Muggles smell of jam"

Brilliant.

Cracking social commentary, as always.

Thanks a lot, Moony!

What happened?

What do you think happened?

She stormed off, that's what.

I thought you said she liked me.

She... she did, she...

That was it, that was my last chance!

It's never gonna happen now.

I'm sorry, James.

So, did you talk to Snape?

Yeah...

Yeah I did.

And...?

He...

He called me a mudblood, again.

Git.

Stupid Valentine's.

Stupid dance.

She might come round...

I'm not asking her again!

If that's what you're saying.

Yeah, come on Remus,

the man's got self-respect.

I mean, 200 times is one thing,

but 201!

Now that would be pathetic.

Piss off.

Cheer up, Prongsie!

Merlin.

You're better off without her anyway.

What's that supposed to mean?

James, can you--

Not now, Peter.

What does that mean?

"You're better off without her?"

Look, you're my best friend, Prongs

and I love you

but you've been such a fucking bore recently

just 'Lily this' and 'Lily that'...

She's--

Oh come on, Prongs!

James, I really need--

That's my spot.

Says who?

Says me.

Budge up.

Listen I'm sorry about before.

It's fine.

I get it.

You wanted to talk to him.

I mean, you're wasting your time if you ask me.

It's all gotten so complicated, hasn't it?

What has?

I dunno.

This.

The outside world.

Everything that's going on.

I guess.

What do you mean "I guess"?

Well...

It doesn't seem that complicated to me.

James Potter's got it all figured out, has he?

Sure.

We leave school,

we join up with the Ministry, or...

or Dumbledore, or...

or whoever's fighting Voldemort--

James!

Look...

I...

I won't ask you out any more.

I promise.

I've...

got the message.

After 2 years, ey?

Yeah.

You know...

the sad thing is...

I was...

planning on saying 'yes' this time.

Wait...

Really?

Yeah.

I mean...

It was bound to happen at some point.

So what about tonight?

The dance?

Yeah alright, Potter.

God, this has been so silly, hasn't it?

I can't believe it.

I mean, you've made me look like a fool for all these years...

No, James, you've been making yourself look like a fool.

Uh! I do not make myself look like a fool...

...we could head back to the common room,

Would you drop it already?

have ourselves a nice, quiet evening...

That a date, Moony?

Like you'd get a better offer.

Sounds like a snooze, no offence.

Sirius...

I just don't think this is a good idea!

Oh Merlin!

I wouldn't have brought you along

if I knew you were gonna be such a wet blanket about it!

Shhh!

They're up ahead.

Dammit Moony!

I'm sorry!

It's not as easy as it used to be.

Look what she's done to him.

Poor bastard.

Maybe she said 'yes'.

Yeah right.

I mean it!

Look.

Evans is a sensible girl.

James...

he's more like me.

It's never gonna happen.

You so sure?

What're you doing?

I'm just gonna make things a little more...

interesting.

Is that a dungbomb?

Technically it's two.

No, Sirius, no!

Oh, come on!

Just...

What?

Look at them.

Who wants to go on a date, anyways?

Maybe someday.

Trust me, they're overrated.

She's nice, you know.

Lily.

You'd like her.

If you spent some time with her.

Yeah.

You know, Sirius?

I reckon we managed a pretty good bit of

mischief in our time.

This should say "by Jaida Jones & Rave Sashayed"!

I'm worried about falling in the fountain.

No, it'll be fine.

Muggle photographs are so much easier than this!

Y'know, you just strike a pose,

one click, and it's done.

What, so you just...?

Yep!

Where's the fun in that?

I mean...

if we were just posing

would I be able to...?

Okay. Let's focus.

Let's focus.