Original subtitles

so

[Music]

uh

[Music]

[Music]

love is bestowing such a bright romantic

light

the wonder world is

[Music]

is

[Music]

from

[Music]

is

[Music]

um

[Music]

mr hatch

oh yesterday mr savory wants to see you

mr savory

oh

boy i'm terribly sorry mr cruster you

will be now come on get going yes don't

keep mr savory waiting no sir he wants

you to do some special work in the art

gallery yes sir well i'll just be him

and i'll get this right done right now

me

oh

that's gonna move on

there we are now

see it's all finished now mr crust

oh

oh oh i'm awfully sorry did i hurt you

get going mr hedge yes sir yes sir

eddie

eddie

oh hi gloria i was just up to the model

home exhibit they have the darling as

kitchen all electric push a button and

you can cook without knowing how to cook

no well i'll see you later honey where

you going i'm going up to the fine arts

department mr savory wants me to do a

special background on some new artwork

mr savory oh gee yeti did he pick you to

do it well it's special work gloria not

everybody can do it oh eddie if you make

a good impression on mr sabrina why he

might give you a raise or a better job

and then we could yeah well let's talk

about it some other time shall we

you do want to get married don't you oh

of course gloria of course but

i i'll see you later

oh mr hatch yes sir oh

hello joe

hello eddie say gloria was just up here

did you meet her on the way down yeah i

saw her hey come on and take a look at

the model home gloria was crazy about it

oh well she would be she's practically

in her wedding veil every minute one

false move for me and i'm gonna be on my

honeymoon ah gloria's a wonderful girl

eddie oh well i know she is but she's so

terribly one-track-minded why even when

we have dinner together the only thing

she ever eats is rice

holy mackerel it's closing time look joe

uh i'm gonna have to work late tonight

so will you pick up gloria for me and

take her to tony's sure will all right

now get there as soon as i can oh save

me some spimoni sure

closing time ladies and gentlemen i'm

sorry you've been after this venus

statue a long time haven't you mr savory

ever since i opened the art gallery here

in the store it's been my dream to add

the anatolian venus to my collection

what did this dream set you back well

let's put it this way the store will not

declare a dividend this year please must

we talk dollars and cents about this

priceless piece the last priceless on it

was two hundred thousand two hundred

thousand wow

did you get someone to fix those drapes

yes eddie hatch you'll be here any

minute he's a good boy he's been with us

for eight years there he is

is the statue for sale mr saban

hello eddie hello miss grant mr savory

said for me must be pretty important yes

he wants you to fix the drapes in front

of the statue it jams when you pull the

cord you fix huh

is that all well that's all for now

eddie hurry it up will you uh yes mrs

graham goodbye almost grant me i have

one please oh certainly oh wait a minute

the good side

[Music]

um

[Music]

to venus the goddess of love may she

stay on the job and take care of all of

us

venus whitfield darling

[Music]

hello barbara what is all this about a

certain most eligible bachelor falling

in love with a statue

perhaps my dash reminds me of you

yeah they both have large pedestals

whitfield you remember my daughter

brenda

not little brenda

you've um

grown brenda hatch is waiting chief he

finished the drapes oh

excuse

me whitfield hasn't seen brenda since

she was a child he used to bounce her on

his knee well bully for brenda i've been

a secretary for 10 years and i haven't

made it yet

pardon me

now we'll see if it works easily

you see it jams there yes sir

i don't know what could have happened to

it i i want that material to go up

smoothly so that the statue will be

revealed dramatically yes sir now use

your head hatch i don't have to fumble

with that rope like a fool in front of

all my friends i know sir i'll take care

of it sir hurry up

yes sir

oh mr savory uh you forgot your uh

[Music]

um

[Music]

golly you're beautiful

[Music]

uh

[Music]

please how can i fix this if you don't

stand still

[Music]

i'm all right

i'm all right

it's a little overworked maybe but i'm

all

right you're moving

was it you who kissed me

you're talking

you're alive well of course i'm alive

what did you think i was

well i'm not very bright i thought you

were a statue

excuse it

brandy smelly salts spirits of ammonia

poor mortal are you frightened

frightened

i don't know the meaning of the word why

are you darling you are frightened

well

just from the toes up

come here

come here to me close to me

oh he's wonderful

thank you jupiter

[Music]

yeah that's better

huh

how did i get out here i brought you out

fresh air

oh oh thanks

i guess i fainted didn't i

i i was working on the draperies around

the statue

and all of a sudden i had the strangest

feeling some kind of a delirium

i dreamed that the statue came to life

that spoke to me is that silly how do

you feel now oh i feel much better thank

you

just rest

hmm

there isn't that nice

oh that's wonderful

oh i uh excuse me but i

get back to my dre

it was you

the statue of course

you came to life now don't ask a lot of

questions you'll only get confused

get confused

i'm spinning like a merry-go-round

look

look let's get this straight

just a few minutes ago you were cold

marble yes you were i could feel you

please

and and now you're and now

don't come near me i'll scream

oh aren't you ashamed a big boy like you

scared to death of a girl yeah but

you're not a girl you're a statue

are you a betting man

well

you were a statue

oh look i don't understand any of this

who are you i am venus daughter of

jupiter goddess of love oh i'm very glad

to know you my name is hatch eddie hatch

displayed

goddess of what love

the word seems to displease you oh no

your majesty it's just call me venus

venus

could i go now

you don't want to stay here with me in

the moonlight

alone

well if you won't think it's impertinent

frankly no see um excuse me it's just

that some friends of mine are waiting

for me for dinner at the little italian

place tony's they might be worried about

me sounds charming i will go with you

oh no no you wouldn't like it

they don't cater very much to goddesses

well

you're around us who started the trojan

war with i love you

some of you may recall the myth that

jupiter once breathed life into the

chiseled perfection of this masterpiece

but in the 20th century that's not

worthwhile discussing

in fact

the beauty of face and form which i'm

about to reveal is such that the 20th

century would seem a little unworthy oh

what a nice man

in roman religion that's mr savory he's

my boss

he owns the story

as some of you may know

there wasn't going to be any statue

there

yeah but what if i was to savor he left

me in charge he's gonna think i'm

responsible

but no words of mine can do justice to

what i want you now to behold

my good friends lovers of art

the matchless anatolian venus

[Laughter]

well you're just full of surprises it's

gone my statute's not here this isn't a

gag gag it's been stolen

hatch that's me

hatched hatch where's that idiot window

trimmer

don't be afraid you're above me

immortals like this department store

owner you're now under the protection of

the olympian gods yeah

well supposing he fires me what are you

gonna do make me a patron saint of the

window trimmers they'll hear you

mr savory's timing is a little off today

the cart before the horse so to speak he

kills me i'll let you know when the

horse gets back we'll have another

unveiling

sorry you made this trip for nothing but

you know holly

coming sire

bye shirley

call the kerrigan detective agency tell

them i want their best men all right no

mr kerrigan personally it shall be done

years of work endless patience search

fabulous expense and then it's gone do

you want me to advertise a reward for

eddie hatch too not for him just for his

head on a pikestar oh now be reasonable

chief you don't think eddie walked out

of here with that statue under his arm

do you when i left him there was a great

work of art on that pedestal i hold him

responsible

hallelujah

well that's that

oh you think so didn't you hear mr

savory he holds me responsible

what if he takes the price of the statue

out of my pay huh

200 000 and i make 43.75

a week why that's uh uh let's see that's

87 years the twinkling of an eye

besides i shall wait a hundred thousand

if necessary oh no you won't you've got

me into enough trouble the only thing

you can do for me is to get back up on

your pedestal and leave me alone

you do not want me you're turning me

away

very well go go to your friends

[Music]

well i will

but uh what about you you can't stay out

here on the balcony you'll freeze in

that uh um and what you're wearing i'll

be all right

why don't you go inside and get up on

your nice warm pedals i'll stay here

[Music]

well

all right that's what you want

good night

[Applause]

say gloria eddie may be a long time you

better eat something oh i can't i'm too

nervous i just can't wait to find out

what's happened

you know i've heard mr savory put eddie

in charge of window dressing in the

entire store

eddie has wonderful ideas about dressing

windows he didn't get his diploma from

correspondence school for nothing he's a

pretty smart fella all right you know

joe you want to be a success too you

work hard

someday mr savory will notice you and

you'll get a promotion too

but remember stay in there pitching and

you'll get a hit

well i don't know gloria you do want to

be a success don't you

yeah but

hey eddie

what happened we thought you'd gotten

lost or something how was the unveiling

oh it was awful statue disappeared

i mean mr savory thinks it disappeared

oh but you didn't have anything to do

with it did you who me

what's wrong daddy

what's my name come on tell me what's my

name eddie hatch

oh that's right eddie hatch

my name is eddie hatch i work in the

display department at savory's

department store you see i know my name

and i know where i work i'm insane i'm

the same as anybody of course you're

saying that he naturally you're saying

isn't he gloria i don't know what's all

this about a statue and what happened to

it and how did you get mixed up oh i

don't know gloria i mean i'm not sure

anyway mr savory holds me responsible i

heard him say so but how did it

disappear yeah a statue doesn't just get

up and walk away eddie

that's right

well it's ridiculous

i've got nothing to worry about

i'm in good shape

you're in great shape

your name hatch

no that's me why i gotta ask you a lot

of questions hatch come on say what's

all this

police well you're taking him what's he

done taking him back to the store mr

savory wants to see him about a little

200 000 statue that climbed down and

walked away

that's right how did you know oh come on

see you later gloria

see you later joe eddie

come here to me come close to me

okay okay go on

i've already done it a hundred times go

on go on show me from the start for

heaven's sakes

if i was here show me again

well how can i fix this if you don't

stand still

then all of a sudden i was down here

you're talking you're alive

of course i'm alive

then i was here

he's still sticking to that story he'll

crack i've dealt with these clever sharp

lifters before pretty clever he

pretended a thousand pound statue was an

elk's tooth and just wore it out you're

talking i know he had help probably a

couple of valves or very funny but i've

got one of his accomplices lined up

right now but this guy had access to the

store he's the ringleader no layoff

hatch couldn't be leader and ring around

the rosies i'm paying kerrigan to be the

detective molly well buy him some badge

polish and send him home anyone can tell

this boy isn't a thief

come on eddie

i'll catch you a couple of flies and you

can pull their wings off

now you go on home and get some rest

come here to me

come close to me i'll take it easy eddie

i might take you up on that later

he's plenty smart but i'll keep my eye

on him

pulse is okay

let's see now

temperature's normal

see eddie you're all right don't pay any

attention to that crooked thermometer i

must have a fever nonsense you're just

upset with that savory and that dopey

detective i'm so sick look look eddie

i'll run a bath for you

we'll go to tony's and get eddie some

nourishing soup

minnesotana your favorite you didn't

have any dinner oh yeah i must be a week

from hunger we'll be right back come on

gloria

don't don't let the water run over

you're talking

you're alive

come to me

[Music]

[Applause]

oh no

what are you doing here you can't come

in please why not well because my girl's

coming right back

she's very jealous you know oh she's

like a wild cat when she gets angry

she's eight feet tall and she's got very

sharp fingernails silly boy what can she

do to me well i don't know but she can

do plenty to me

please go away you sound impact poor boy

i'll bet she runs your life like an

assembly line and how

why eve

nothing of this sort she's sweet she's a

very nice girl well i'm a very nice girl

oh please please be reasonable miss miss

venus

i'm not worth bothering about i'm not

famous i'm not rich

i'm not even very bright

no i'm not bright in fact there's

insanity in my family starting with me

tonight i'm crazy

oh you you must have me mixed up with

somebody else i'm just a little old good

for nothing window trimmer you can be

anything you want to be

can i be alone i'll leave if you'll go

with me oh no no please go away my

landlady you know she wouldn't

understand she she's got a rule against

me no

about girls being with boys

why there's even a law against it

oh is this your landlady oh no no no

hello

oh hello gory i was just talking about

you uh

that is uh uh

to myself how i had quite a little chat

me and

and and me

he's talking to himself well that's bad

look darling keep calm listen they're

all out of minestrone you could have

either noodle or spinach uh

uh noodle or spinach uh noodle

spinach noodle spinach noodle

don't bother me who's bothering you i'm

only trying to help

what do you mean

i'd be glad to leave you alone

gloria i heard a woman not narrow well

it wasn't the zoo what wait a minute

where'd i get this package come on i've

had enough of this

who who is it it's me i want to come in

oh it's my landlady

oh that's no good over here

what's that

mr hatch oh one moment

open up this very instant coming ms

goggity coming

miss venus

where are you here i am she'll never

find me here

oh not in here quick get out please

hurry okay behind the screen

i'm coming in mr hatch oh of course miss

gogerty of course

you got a woman in this room why mrs

gogerty what an idea whatever the idea

you know the rules you've got we both

get out just behind that screen uh uh uh

dirty dishes kindly remove us oh mrs

gogetti i had to give her a square meal

i i said to myself well mrs gogerty with

her kind her

there you see there's nobody here

oh a miss coconut there's nothing in

there but a sink and a tub and things

like that

oh

so you take them too

what i adore bubble bats i take them all

the time especially those ones with a

lovely jasmine smell

order of pine tar my husband uses that

he does sorry to disturb you mr hatch

but you don't want cat be too careful

these days oh well good night ms gogerty

good night

love that smell yes good night

miss phoenix

your majesty miss venus here i am is she

gone

oh my gosh get out of there quick

oh no no

and get dressed in a hurry

open the door eddie hatch no honest

gloria anyone do anything like that to

you and get away with it

hurry hurry

come and get your soup

it's hot

did i help yes yes you are wonderful

come on

eddie

open the

see gloria there's no woman here there's

no eddie either

that phony pretending he's sick just to

get rid of me boy wait till the next

time i see him

he won't have to pretend

gloria there wouldn't be anybody in

there

oh

moonlight madness

40 an ounce smell

it's worth it worth it oh oh now wait a

minute

oh gloria

now take it easy

i chase around worrying about his health

and

he just chases around oh you don't

understand a lot of things could happen

[Music]

[Music]

people bother us oh

certainly will don't you realize i'm

breaking into the store

i'll turn him into an owl

what now it's very easy i just go like

that

oh come on

[Music]

excuse me

[Music]

it's locked

now what am i gonna do

well haven't you got any ideas

look it's late you've got to have some

place to stay

don't you ever want to go to sleep

[Music]

you see i trust you eddie

[Music]

[Music]

come on

[Music]

what's wrong now aren't you gonna carry

me over the threshold

why do you keep acting as if we were on

our honeymoon

oh all right

you you stay here tonight you'll be nice

and comfortable i'll get you out in the

morning

[Music]

oh it's lovely oh well this is the very

latest thing

now everything is operated through this

master control

now there's the radio and the bed

and the air conditioning and the kitchen

tell me how it works

well i'll turn on the radio

well we'll have to wait a little while

you know for it to warm up

the beds

i must have pushed the wrong button

[Music]

well i did it was marked radio

here we'll try this one no it should

work

oh

hey

there must be a short circuit

someplace you know what it's getting

late you better be getting some sleep

but i'm wide awake oh no you're not

you're you're sleepy you're you're very

sleepy

close your eyes

you want to sleep

sleep

sleep

sleep

sleep

sleep

sleep

oh

that's no good i'm hypnotizing myself oh

eddie you're so cute i'm not cute

why i'm a beast

i'm terrible when you get to know me ask

gloria

no no no don't ask gloria

oh why are you messing up my life i was

a dependable respectable citizen until

tonight were you having any fun

that's all you think about is fun

that's all right for you flying around

on mount olympus or wherever you come

from without a care in the world but

down here it's different

we're practical and efficient

why we perfected a machine here

what have i done

you kissed me

you made me do that

that's not fair you tricked me you used

some kind of a spell on me no eddie i

wouldn't do that

you mean i wanted to

i hope so

well as i was saying the uh

uh um

there's another button here

that uh

turns on the automatic stove

yeah you can cook a whole meal by remote

control just by

by pushing that button

how do you fall in love

in love

to the music of harps and flutes

floats

[Music]

[Music]

so that's how you fall in love

[Music]

when you speak

love our summer day

with us away

too soon

too soon

speak long

when you speak love

our moment is swift like ships adrift

we're swept apart

too soon

speak lord

darling speak lord

love is a spark lost in the dark

too soon

to soon

i feel

[Music]

wherever i go

that tomorrow is near

tomorrow is here

and always too soon

time is over

[Music]

darling we're late

the curtain descends

everything

ends too soon

too soon

i wait

[Music]

darling

i wait

will you

speak

lord to me

[Music]

[Applause]

speak lord

when you speak love

our summer day

withers away

too soon

to soon

speak long

when you speak love

our moment is swift like ships adrift

we're swept apart

to soon

speak love

darling speak long

love is a spark lost in the dark

too soon

to soon

[Applause]

[Music]

love is

[Music]

the curtain descends

everything ends

too soon

[Music]

will you speak lord

[Music]

sunday papers here get your sunday

morning papers

get your sunday papers here papers

[Music]

hello stammers where's the great white

father no he's with a detective in the

bedroom miss he'll find plenty of clues

in there

hi gumshoe

your handcuffs are showing

open up sire come on in molly

try every school and university in

europe the guy i want is an old

professor named ludovicio fasoli i met

him once in prague

oh he must be 19 is alive

he is the author of a famous volume

called the strange legends and myths

surrounding the anatolian venus

why do i care what it costs i want some

action on this

right i'll keep in touch

had to chat with kerrigan he's been

looking into hatch's background how'd

you sleep last night not a wink i didn't

think so at least it took your mind off

cold marble for a while

just what is that supposed to mean a

little bundle tucked away in the model

home

she should be a sensation during january

clearance sales what on earth are you

talking about i've got to hand it to you

she's an eyeful

you mean there's a girl downstairs

look this is molly

who is she somebody i know yeah

goldilocks she ate the porridge and now

she snoozes under the model sheets on

the model bed in the model home we'll

see about that

i'm not running a motel for homeless

girls hey boss wait for me

it's no fire boss just a simple

old-fashioned eviction she'll still be

there only long enough for me to throw

her out bodily the idea woman breaking

into savory so unnecessary

[Music]

don't flush

[Music]

molly

that girl she

she reminds me of someone yeah i wish

she reminded me of me

she's the most beautiful creature i've

ever seen

molly i've always been able to count on

you this time you must not fail me on

your honor

don't wake her

when she does get up

her dreams must come true

get flowers clothes jewelry everything

promise me

i'll be right back

[Music]

thank you

[Music]

good morning

oh hello joe

where are you going so early out

hey eddie what happened last night when

gloria and i came back you were gone

where'd you go

look joel there's something i got to

talk to you about uh you're my best

friend aren't you

well i'm not so sure anything well i i

can trust you can't i joe look eddie

there's something you've just got to

know it's gloria

yeah it's gloria

but it was the music or something ah the

music it it it did something to you all

of a sudden for no reason you found

yourself kissing her

yeah that's right

but remember it wasn't her fault oh yes

it was joe she she does something to you

she sure does

oh thanks joe you're a pal you

understand you won't tell gloria

anything about it will you

me gloria

understand what

about my kissing the statue she wouldn't

understand eddie you kissed a statue

yeah well well she wasn't a statue then

who wasn't a statue venus of course

she was here last night she took a

bubble bath you gave a statue a bubble

bath oh no joe she took it herself i

didn't give it to her look look look

eddie i think your fever's coming back

or something i've gotta get back to the

model home and get her out of bed oh

look eddie wait for me

don't worry about having me come down

today ms grant i don't mind oh he'd get

the sultan out of bed

well i guess these rags are the gladys

i hope he won't get into any trouble

doing all these things for me he told me

to give you anything you need

from where i stand you don't need to

think

you know the funniest thing happened to

me last night me too

i was out with someone oh yeah

sweetheart oh no that's what's so funny

he was just a friend

but

all of a sudden he was the right one

i just meet the wrong ones

oh i just can't figure it out one day

you're out with someone who isn't

anybody special and then

he makes you feel like everybody else is

well

nobody

[Music]

you know the way you feel when there is

autumn in the air

that's him

that's him

the way you feel when antoine has

finished with your hair

that's him

that's him

you know the way you feel when you smell

fresh bread baking the way you feel when

all your aching back stops aching

wonderful world

wonderful you

that's him

that's him that's him he's simple as a

breeze that blows in summer

he's natural

not actory

he's like a plumber when you need a

plumbing

he's satisfactory

you know the way you feel at movies when

the lights grow dimmer

the way you feel when overnight your

hips grow slimmer

wonderful

wonderful

say

say

say new york savory in the darkest caves

and hallways i would know him always

cause i would see that he's the one for

me

how could i pass by him when i'd

identify him

so easily

because that's he

you know the way you feel about the

wraps of being blue his eyes are blue

his eyes are brown

his around the town

the way you feel about a hat

created just for you

that's him

that's him he is christmas he's carrier

he's a coke with cherry

let's face it girls he's a man he's

necessary

wonderful world

wonderful you

[Music]

that's him

that's him

that's him

[Music]

that's that oops no shoes okay my little

quarterback you're still carrying the

ball shoe department size four and a

half four and a half ridiculous

well the stage is set i'll go get romeo

[Music]

hey eddie

shh

look look eddie i i don't really think

you're well crazy or anything i i just

think you're a little overworked oh i'm

gonna be all right just as soon as i can

get her out of here but why did you

bring a girl up here in the first place

oh joe don't ask me any questions i

don't know but the answer is myself look

joe you're my pal aren't you yeah will

you stay here and if anybody comes you'd

be my lookout give me a whistle or

something give me warning hollow again

venus

your majesty

venus

where are you

this is no time for games of all the

dresses you gave me i like this one the

best

dresses i gave you

you don't like it

of course not i'll be fired take it off

i'm in enough trouble alright

take it off

hi gloria hi joe where you going oh i'm

going to the model home

come on you got

what are you doing

what are you what are you doing you

didn't like it oh i love it honest i

love it just put it back on and get out

no hurry hurry no no i want it please oh

you can please me just get out

here do you like this oh i love it it's

beautiful it's gorgeous

now get in there get dressed and don't

come out until i call you

already are you sure you're gonna like

this one oh i'm crazy about it i'm nuts

about it

you uh look awfully nice gloria

thanks joe you look uh

neat

yep

real neat

look joe do you want to

oh do you want to talk to me make up

your mind

is that eddie eddie

oh yeah that's eddie and he hatched me

in there with that girl girl oh oh

there's no girl in there eddie's in

there alone eddie's working yep

just working away

i'll bet

um

[Music]

where did she go

oh hello gloria where did you go

never mind her where did you go oh you

look wonderful today honey i like your

hair that way it's too late for

compliments you're going to wear your

hair short if you don't explain what

happened to you last night last night

oh last night oh you mean uh uh

when i left the house while you were out

getting the soup

what kind of soup did you get honey

noodle and spinach

i didn't want your guest to be

disappointed oh no glory if i ever run

into her she wish he hadn't put in your

spinach

eddie hatch if you think for one minute

you're going to make a fool of me maria

gloria now not now don't get upset it's

not good for you good for me i suppose

you think it's good to be stood up by a

two-timing double-crossing chiseler

fight for two cents that hit you oh no

no no chlorine that's breakable oh so is

your head gloria gloria please

everything in here is charged to me

let's go let's go

i never want to see you again eddie

hatch wouldn't you you can't go well for

you please oh oh glory but i i didn't

mean anything by whatever you wanted

eddie

eddie give me the face

i think she's mad

hey you're just the guy i'm looking for

oh good morning mr kerrigan the

strangest thing i've got a warrant for

your arrest

huh

mr pig

oh i'm through with it

oh cheer up gloria

you and eddie will be making up again

what do you want to bet

no more dates with him

there are plenty of other fish in the

sea

gloria

your gloria your shoe

you know

gloria

if you

ever need anything

you can always count on me

thanks joe

well i'll be seeing you

when

we'll see

see ya

see you

say maybe he's in the basement we'll

give this floor the once over come on

come on

[Music]

so

uh

[Music]

so

[Music]

peek-a-boo hatch

[Music]

how are the employees

[Music]

find me

um we haven't met that is you haven't

met me but my name is whitfield saver of

the second

oh the same name is this establishment i

am this establishment

did you sleep well yes beautifully thank

you yes beautifully

and the clothes oh divine a mere trifle

take the whole store you can even set

fire to it if it amuses you you are

generous mr savory call me whitfield uh

my car's waiting shall we go we

i've arranged everything

lunch at the mom and quiet club

then to montauk point for a candlelight

dinner at the sand and circular then a

moonlit ride to the adirondacks and

breakfast at the crop and spur club i'm

sorry but i don't think eddie would

approve

eddie i want eddie eddie hatch of course

yes last night he brought me here and

then this morning he surprised me with

all these beautiful clothes hatch that

clerk that forty dollar weak window

dresser

eddie

where are you trying to duck me i got

some questions to ask you look mr savory

please don't blame her it's all my fault

have you got the warrant right here mr

savory add these charges breaking into

savories turning this floor into a ywca

and stealing clothes

oh look if if you're just let her go

i'll pay for everything out of your 40 a

week 43.75

come on oh one moment uh whitfield does

this document give you the right to put

eddie in jail it does indeed my damn uh

may i see it please don't worry about me

oh it's very interesting

what the

i thought you were a big boy now

um come on

wait wait i'll turn him into an owl but

i didn't do this i don't even understand

it i don't know who who

who

who what are you doing

arrest that man come on get going

no don't don't don't stop please stop it

[Applause]

what's the matter with you i don't know

i just had a funny feeling boss like i

was gonna lay an egg

we gotta get out of here fast come on

wait a minute

what am i running away for i haven't

done anything i'm not a criminal i say

that

but that

that detective thinks i stole the statue

and mr savory accuses me of stealing

your clothes gloria's mad at me and joe

thinks i'm out of my head i'm gonna go

to jail and lose my job all just because

you kissed a statue yeah

what was that champagne that's what made

me do it

well i'm gonna go back to them now and

tell them the whole truth you didn't

they didn't believe you

oh yeah

well you could be my witness

that's it you could be my witness and

explain it all to them the paper dolls

and everything then mr sabri will

believe me and he won't think i'm a

criminal

oh

perhaps i could persuade mr savory

oh no one of the girls in the store told

me all about him

did he ask you for a date uh

now look your majesty you are the

goddess of love

you belong up on a pedestal where people

can see you and admire you or lots of

people thousands of people you really

want me to go back will you

i didn't think it was time oh there

couldn't be a better time

oh gee

sure has swell up you miss venus i

really appreciate it too now my life

will be just like it was before sensible

orderly and practical and i'll make up

with gloria

yeah just like it was before

[Music]

well

uh

will you be happy uh

that is where you're going oh we worry a

lot about your mortals

well what's it like

[Music]

have you got big cities like this

places to go movies and parks and things

oh gee it's a shame he didn't get to see

everything

i could at least have taken him to the

park

i've caused you enough trouble already

trouble what do you mean trouble i i

guess we could go to the park if we

wanted to you don't really want to take

me of course i do i know my own mind

right now i want to take you to the park

but i ask you molly even giving myself

the worst of it what is this confounded

window trimmer got that i haven't got

well to mention just one thing the girl

you want what can you do for her i can

offer her anything she wants anything

that money can buy you did it wasn't

enough it just doesn't make sense

try to reason about love and you will

lose your reason old french proverb well

i'm not through yet this is a challenge

molly

when i want something i get it no matter

what it costs

not this time i've got a feeling

you know for everybody there's bound to

be one thing

one person that's unattainable well not

for me

okay lord and master

woohoo

[Music]

[Applause]

[Music]

seems more beautiful tonight than it

ever has

[Music]

if this is

don't

look now but my heart is showing

no matter what i say or do

can't hide it my heart's

romeowing i can't stay away from you

you smile and my dreams start hollowing

they spin when you come into view

in circles i may not be going but i feel

i real with you

when mister

kisses miss

no need for words to embroider

when mister

kisses miss changing her name is in

order you smile and the stardust is

blowing

we're whirling in a world that's new

don't look now but your heart is showing

and it flips and halts and turns

summer's soul stalling it wants to waltz

with you

[Applause]

don't ask me but here is my answer

i think that you are magically he

[Music]

don't stop me but i am replying

i know that you are magically

the preacher would like to be tired as

you could i do with me

around round and round

i'm just like a record that's playing

repeating the same sound

the needle must like what i'm saying

these wings that i feel i am growing

belong to someone i never knew don't

look now but heaven is showing and

tonight the sky is my sky to

fly darling

falling in love

[Music]

in

love with you

[Music]

i feel as if i'd swallowed a symphony

orchestra playing the most beautiful

music in the world

in two worlds darling

[Music]

troubled angel

uh

nothing

tell me

well

what about this fellow the the one uh

you turned into an owl uh hip hip hip

didn't you love him once never

he bothered me

oh

do i bother you

no dear

not like that

oh

feathers

and what about

what about this other one this uh

polyphonies

very annoying

was he

so annoying that i finally had to turn

him into a

rock

you mean a boulder a large one it's

perched on the side of mount olympus

but none of them really had my love the

way you do darling oh i'm glad if i'm

different you are

you're the only one

well well then i don't care what happens

you could turn me into a fire hydrant or

a mountain goat if you want to it's

worth it

this is the place boys

you sure he's here

sure we tailed him in the dame and then

phoned you savory double the anti if we

nab hatch tonight come on

dear i just can't believe that this is

happening to me

you know i

i i don't know what to do

i don't know what to say and i don't

know what to do

i'd like to do things for you i'd like

to take you places

you know like uh the men and the ads men

of distinction you know like mr savory

he could buy you everything everything

let me see

could he buy me a bag of popcorn

oh don't be silly of course not what

would you want with a bag

popcorn

do you mean it

great big bag

[Music]

i'll be right back

[Music]

you will still be here when i get back

won't you you won't go away i'll be here

eddie

[Music]

i want the best bag of popcorn you got

it's all the same bob well it's got to

be extra special yeah this is for a

walkie-talkie statue

come

come close to me

[Music]

i can't leave her here alone she's a god

he's still crazy go on

she

[Music]

so

[Music]

what happened i don't know some

detectives just grabbed the kid yeah i

took them away in the car what did he do

search me he was up there

[Music]

debussy you know debussy does something

to women personally i go for buzzy baloo

and his musical crew

save your needles chum i suspect that

this little gal is going to be your

waterloo what else can she do

when they toss hatch into the bastille

she must turn to me

i'm the only one who can get him out

fine strategy general but it won't work

not with this baby

hello baby

what a very unexpected pleasure

am i too late for that candlelight

suffer

gracious no i'll put a couple of candles

on to broil right away uh i'll manage

molly oh i'm a whiz at tallow saute

dollar savory good night molly

i'll chill a bottle of wine for you any

preference your pleasure

don't worry

not me you can take care of yourself i

mean about him

you really care for him don't you

it reminds me of a dog i had no

no you really love him

no why not working here i get a 20

discount

that's what's wrong with you molly you

keep everything inside you shouldn't you

must let him know you talk like an

expert

what do you think

[Music]

good night molly

so long watch out for debussy

[Music]

this is lovely

yes

to you

to us

she walks in beauty like the night

[Music]

of cloudless climbs and starry skies

poetic approach huh

do you bother to learn the whole poem or

just those parts you can whisper to

women

or they can whisper to me

[Music]

another good one is

oh thou art fairer than the evening air

clad in the beauty of a thousand stars

i'll make a note of that

some more wine

please

ah

[Music]

you know you are rather nice

i'm sorry about the way i've acted

beauty likened to a song

such beauty can do no wrong

please you're maddening

[Music]

no whitfield i keep thinking me too very

he's been arrested wonderful

but

it was all my fault oh forget him poor

boy in jail in a cold cell i'll send him

an overcoat and some blankets maybe

maybe you could get him out

why yes yes of course anything anything

it's the least i can do for you

[Music]

yes

the city jail

oh it's you

well what now hello kerrigan i want a

word with you all

now i'm kerrigan huh well be gaura i've

got the feet for it

aha kerrigan you are a card tell him

about eddie yes my dear

i want you to do something for me oh boy

oh why don't you spin your platters you

know debussy does something to women or

better yet flip out your bank books you

can give her anything money can buy now

listen here kerrigan i want action on

this you understand i feel you're so

wonderful thank you my dear hold on

there kerrigan what's that hatch eddie

hatch tell him about that yes i'll have

him out in a minute

now look here molly uh mulligan

kerrigan

i'll put an ad in the morning paper for

a secretary

help wanted female

must be able to take shorthand and body

blows

no no don't do anything rash we'll talk

it over here let me talk to him uh i'll

take care of this my dear you pulled a

lot of chintzy deals but framing a kid

to get his girl is too rich for me even

i'm finally ashamed of you no no don't

go i i've got to talk to you you know

how i need you i i depend on you you

didn't seem to need me before

well you did everything but bounce me

out of your apartment i'll do anything

tell him you'll give him a bonus i'll

give you a bonus

please my dear please i'll take care of

this i'll come right over i'll go with

you no no no no you wait here i'll be

back you wait there i'll be over save

yourself the trip

and tell baby thanks for the advice i

haven't felt so good in years

so long whitfield i walk out in beauty

like the night no no no

some wine please my dear

you

you've got to listen don't don't hang up

you can't leave me flat

my dear are you all right i'm fine molly

molly

molly

molly

molly

she's hung up she wouldn't listen she's

leaving me what are you doing here

we all right i can be there in a minute

two minutes first you call kerrigan

kerrigan oh why of course yes

of course

hello molly molly molly

who is this

who you

kidding oh yes yes mr savory i'm

dropping all charges release hatch at

once tell eddie i'll be waiting send

hatch up to my place right away

the place is yours use anything you want

stay as long as you like thank you

oh

this orchid i think it would look nice

on molly

thank you

excuse me

oh um tell hatch you can have tomorrow

off

[Music]

no no not now

[Music]

please please just a few moments more

so

[Music]

so

[Music]

wait here

hey eddie joe hey i got your bail don't

worry i'll get you out

you are out savory dropped the charges

well gee that's great then they found

the statue who stole it it wasn't stolen

venus is waiting for me right now

savory's department store venus oh

nobody not that again

did you say savory's department store

yeah i'll save his department stole the

nearest hospital savories to the

hospital make up your mind he wants to

go to the hospital savories i'm paying

for this trip now look at he listen to

me you're sick you don't feel i'll show

you i'll introduce you to her joe you'll

like her she's wonderful oh ellie faster

oh i've got to get there joe she may

leave

i want her to stay i want to marry her

we'll get a little place out in ozone

heights oh yeah

i can just see you bouncing little

statues on your knee eddie you've just

got to stop talking like that she's not

a statue joe she's venus goddess of love

you went to the hospital

savory's department store look look

eddie just just relax

you know you gotta quit thinking

with us

[Music]

[Music]

don't be silly that's just the radio

that's venus faster

turn off your radio will you it ain't on

it must be on i'm a bubble let's listen

love is a spider we're all crazy

i feel

[Music]

wherever i go

that tomorrow is near tomorrow is here

and always too soon

[Music]

is

[Music]

everything

ends too soon

too soon

i wait

darling

will you

speak

love

[Applause]

penis

venus see eddie i told you there's

nobody here oh she's gotta be here she

must be here

venus

venus hey eddie come on if mr savory

catches us here we'll both be fired

she's in the model home that's where she

is

[Music]

good shot ed

come on mr savory where did you have it

hidden yes give us the real dope well

the statue simply reappeared as

mysteriously as it disappeared before

you write this off as another publicity

gimmick i suggest you look at ludovici

fasoli's volume on these strange legends

and myths surrounding the anatolian

venus in our book department morocco

bound

it's probably just coincidence but while

our goddess of love was missing the city

hall was snowed under they ran out of

marriage licenses

love sure reared its beautiful head

thanks girl uh did you tell hatch about

his three dollar raise

oh yes

well if you'll excuse us i believe

there's a place called niagara falls

we're going over in a barrel

[Music]

you never even said goodbye

pardon me

could you direct me to the model home oh

yes it's right through the second floor

thank you very much

[Music]

now this

[Music]

ah

did you say you were looking for the

model home yes

you see i just died to work here today

oh that's fine

my name is hatch eddie hatch oh minds

jones venus jones

that's beautiful well it's unusual

anyway nobody's ever likely to meet two

girls named venus

no i guess not

[Music]

you