Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated:
1
00:00:00,070 --> 00:00:01,773
ADULT ADAM: Back in the '80s,
before Will Smith
2
00:00:01,812 --> 00:00:03,884
was a planet-saving movie megastar,
3
00:00:03,914 --> 00:00:06,164
he was a home-grown Philly rap star
4
00:00:06,211 --> 00:00:08,145
known as The Fresh Prince.
5
00:00:08,213 --> 00:00:11,488
Together with DJ Jazzy Jeff,
they took the world by storm
6
00:00:11,536 --> 00:00:14,504
and made us all want to spit
rhymes and scratch records.
7
00:00:14,572 --> 00:00:16,338
[MUSIC PLAYS, NEEDLE SCRATCHING RECORD]
8
00:00:16,407 --> 00:00:18,750
No one loved it more
than my brother, Barry.
9
00:00:18,805 --> 00:00:20,391
[SCOFFS] Well, this is ruined.
10
00:00:20,444 --> 00:00:21,677
[RECORD SHATTERS]
11
00:00:21,745 --> 00:00:23,178
[RAPPING] ♪ There's no need to argue ♪
12
00:00:23,247 --> 00:00:24,680
♪ Parents just don't understand ♪
13
00:00:24,748 --> 00:00:26,915
I love how Jazzy Jeff and Fresh Prince
14
00:00:26,984 --> 00:00:29,051
are always super funny
and rap about happy stuff.
15
00:00:29,119 --> 00:00:31,062
And yet they still have edge.
16
00:00:31,109 --> 00:00:33,523
I mean, these dudes are
basically identical to us.
17
00:00:33,602 --> 00:00:34,901
Really? I don't think
18
00:00:34,970 --> 00:00:36,078
the mean streets of West Philly
19
00:00:36,132 --> 00:00:38,484
are anything like the quiet
cul-de-sacs of Jenkintown.
20
00:00:38,549 --> 00:00:40,649
Dude, thing about it...
Fresh Prince raps
21
00:00:40,718 --> 00:00:43,085
about how he hates homework,
loves video games,
22
00:00:43,154 --> 00:00:45,354
and how all parents
just don't understand.
23
00:00:45,422 --> 00:00:46,588
That does sound like us.
24
00:00:46,657 --> 00:00:48,457
Shut up, shut up!
Here comes the best part.
25
00:00:48,526 --> 00:00:50,793
[RAPPING] ♪ Oh-kay,
here's the situation ♪
26
00:00:50,861 --> 00:00:53,295
BOTH: ♪ My parents went away
on a week's vacation ♪
27
00:00:53,364 --> 00:00:55,998
Dude! Stop singing my part!
28
00:00:56,066 --> 00:00:57,933
Clearly, if we were a hip-hop duo,
29
00:00:58,002 --> 00:01:00,369
you would be Jazzy Jeff
and I'd be The Fresh Prince.
30
00:01:00,437 --> 00:01:01,837
I don't want to be the Jazzy Jeff.
31
00:01:01,906 --> 00:01:03,605
He just stands in the back
and bops his head.
32
00:01:03,674 --> 00:01:05,340
Everything falls apart without the bop.
33
00:01:05,409 --> 00:01:06,809
Then you be him. You bop.
34
00:01:06,877 --> 00:01:08,110
I don't wanna to bop.
35
00:01:08,179 --> 00:01:09,778
What if we both be The Fresh Prince?
36
00:01:09,847 --> 00:01:11,413
Wait, is that even allowed?
Can there be two?
37
00:01:11,482 --> 00:01:13,749
[GASPS] Did we just become a rap duo
38
00:01:13,818 --> 00:01:16,185
whose future's so bright,
we got to wear chains?
39
00:01:16,253 --> 00:01:17,853
That's for sure not the expression,
40
00:01:17,922 --> 00:01:19,221
but, yes, I think we did.
41
00:01:19,290 --> 00:01:21,890
Which means we need Jazzy Jeff
and Fresh Prince gear stat!
42
00:01:23,205 --> 00:01:25,506
Neon... the color of the streets.
43
00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:27,609
Ugh, too bright. Here, try this on.
44
00:01:27,688 --> 00:01:29,888
What's wrong? This shirt cost $20.
45
00:01:29,957 --> 00:01:32,257
This shirt is plaid
with a butterfly collar.
46
00:01:32,326 --> 00:01:33,825
What are you doing? You'll ruin my rep.
47
00:01:33,894 --> 00:01:36,147
You're only 16.
You don't have a rep yet.
48
00:01:36,202 --> 00:01:37,902
Let's put these clothes back, please?
49
00:01:37,970 --> 00:01:41,005
No. You go to school to learn,
not for a fashion show.
50
00:01:41,074 --> 00:01:43,240
Here, try on these double-knit,
reversible slacks.
51
00:01:43,309 --> 00:01:44,809
Oh, balls, no!
52
00:01:44,877 --> 00:01:46,477
She'll never understand!
53
00:01:46,546 --> 00:01:48,212
♪ I'm twisted up inside ♪
54
00:01:48,281 --> 00:01:51,482
♪ But nonetheless,
I feel the need to say ♪
56
00:01:54,554 --> 00:01:55,953
♪ I don't know the future ♪
57
00:01:56,022 --> 00:01:58,889
♪ But the past keeps getting
clearer every day ♪
58
00:01:58,958 --> 00:02:02,026
It was December 6th, 1980-something,
59
00:02:02,095 --> 00:02:04,428
and Erica was feeling the
freedom of life at college.
60
00:02:04,497 --> 00:02:06,214
- Well, sort of.
- Hey, Erica.
61
00:02:06,260 --> 00:02:08,277
Don't you "Erica" me, Erica.
62
00:02:08,333 --> 00:02:10,290
Your mom's left like 50 messages.
63
00:02:10,322 --> 00:02:13,524
50? [SCOFFS] Please.
Don't be so dramatic.
64
00:02:13,585 --> 00:02:16,987
MAN: You have 49 new messages.
65
00:02:17,054 --> 00:02:18,354
- Told ya.
- [ANSWERING MACHINE BEEPS]
66
00:02:18,423 --> 00:02:19,623
BEVERLY: Hey, Boopie! It's Mama!
67
00:02:19,691 --> 00:02:20,957
Haven't heard from you this morning.
68
00:02:21,026 --> 00:02:22,159
- Call me!
- [BEEP]
69
00:02:22,227 --> 00:02:23,627
[SINGSONG] Hey, it's me again.
70
00:02:23,695 --> 00:02:25,228
Thought I'd check in on my only daughter
71
00:02:25,296 --> 00:02:27,663
and light of my life,
who may be in great danger.
72
00:02:27,665 --> 00:02:28,525
[BEEP]
73
00:02:28,550 --> 00:02:30,132
[STERNLY] Erica, please pick up the phone.
74
00:02:30,202 --> 00:02:31,434
It's 2:20, and I'm starting to wonder
75
00:02:31,502 --> 00:02:32,568
if you've been attacked by a bear.
76
00:02:32,637 --> 00:02:34,203
- Are there bears here?
- No.
77
00:02:34,273 --> 00:02:37,207
- [BEEP]
- [SOBBING] It's 5:23,
78
00:02:37,276 --> 00:02:41,411
- and I need to know where you are!
- [BEEP]
79
00:02:41,480 --> 00:02:42,479
[NORMAL VOICE]
I've taken a few deep breaths,
80
00:02:42,548 --> 00:02:43,880
- and I'm good.
- [BEEP]
81
00:02:43,949 --> 00:02:45,248
[VOICE BREAKING]
Now I'm hyperventilating.
82
00:02:45,317 --> 00:02:46,850
- [BEEP]
- [CHEERILY] Call me!
83
00:02:46,919 --> 00:02:48,785
- [BEEP]
- [STERNLY] Call me!
84
00:02:48,853 --> 00:02:50,119
- [BEEP]
- Dear, God!
85
00:02:50,188 --> 00:02:52,254
I literally spoke to that woman
a few days ago.
86
00:02:52,323 --> 00:02:54,256
Look, moms worry.
It's, like, what they do.
87
00:02:54,325 --> 00:02:55,958
- Just pick up next time.
- No!
88
00:02:56,027 --> 00:02:57,626
If I talk to her once a day,
89
00:02:57,695 --> 00:02:59,662
then she'll want to talk once an hour
90
00:02:59,730 --> 00:03:01,030
and then once a minute.
91
00:03:01,098 --> 00:03:03,132
- When will the madness end?
- I don't think it ever will.
92
00:03:03,201 --> 00:03:04,533
Your life's gonna be really bad.
93
00:03:04,602 --> 00:03:06,368
[PHONE RINGS]
94
00:03:06,437 --> 00:03:07,603
Aghh!
95
00:03:07,672 --> 00:03:09,004
- [DIAL TONE]
- Hello?
96
00:03:09,073 --> 00:03:12,174
Murray, she picked up for a split second
97
00:03:12,243 --> 00:03:14,143
and then hung up.
There's only one explanation.
98
00:03:14,212 --> 00:03:15,411
She doesn't want to talk to you.
99
00:03:15,479 --> 00:03:16,645
- Go to sleep.
- No.
100
00:03:16,714 --> 00:03:18,681
She was obviously eating a hard candy,
101
00:03:18,749 --> 00:03:20,115
and it got lodged in her throat.
102
00:03:20,184 --> 00:03:22,852
And when she grabbed the phone
to call 911, she passed out!
103
00:03:22,920 --> 00:03:24,954
What kind of college has
hard candies lying around?
104
00:03:25,022 --> 00:03:25,988
You don't know!
105
00:03:26,057 --> 00:03:27,323
There could be a lobby with a dish.
106
00:03:27,391 --> 00:03:29,592
Are you watching that S.O.B.
Phil Donahue again?
107
00:03:29,660 --> 00:03:32,428
He did an exposé
on choking hazards, Murray.
108
00:03:32,496 --> 00:03:35,965
Did you know that hard candy
kills more people than smoking?
109
00:03:36,033 --> 00:03:38,834
That gray-haired bastard.
All he does is make you worry.
110
00:03:38,903 --> 00:03:40,135
When Erica lived here,
111
00:03:40,204 --> 00:03:42,605
she was fed and clothed
and had easy BMs.
112
00:03:42,673 --> 00:03:44,807
Now I don't know what's
going on, and it's torture.
113
00:03:44,876 --> 00:03:48,310
[SNORING]
114
00:03:48,379 --> 00:03:50,312
Are you sleeping?
115
00:03:50,381 --> 00:03:52,615
[SNORING CONTINUES]
116
00:03:52,683 --> 00:03:53,716
I'm up!
117
00:03:53,784 --> 00:03:55,351
- W-Who's locked out?
- What?!
118
00:03:55,419 --> 00:03:58,387
You said, um, um, someone's locked out.
119
00:03:58,456 --> 00:04:00,289
No, you fell asleep again!
120
00:04:00,358 --> 00:04:02,725
[SNORING]
121
00:04:02,793 --> 00:04:04,760
ADULT ADAM: While my mom
was failing to reach Erica,
122
00:04:04,829 --> 00:04:06,829
my and my big bro
were brainstorming ways
123
00:04:06,898 --> 00:04:09,365
- to reach rap superstardom.
- As you all know,
124
00:04:09,433 --> 00:04:12,067
Fresh Prince has what
we in showbiz call "It."
125
00:04:12,136 --> 00:04:13,435
- Love him.
- So approachable.
126
00:04:13,504 --> 00:04:15,170
My mom knows his aunt
and hears good things.
127
00:04:15,239 --> 00:04:17,206
The secret behind
Fresh Prince's success is
128
00:04:17,275 --> 00:04:19,775
his rhymes are always about
funny, universal topics.
129
00:04:19,844 --> 00:04:22,411
Example... Parents
just don't understand.
130
00:04:22,480 --> 00:04:24,313
Naked Rob, do your parents understand?
131
00:04:24,382 --> 00:04:25,648
No, they don't.
132
00:04:25,716 --> 00:04:27,449
They said I should at least
wear flip-flops outside.
133
00:04:27,518 --> 00:04:29,084
Naked Rob don't do flip-flops.
134
00:04:29,153 --> 00:04:31,253
Gah! I'm super fired up and angry,
135
00:04:31,322 --> 00:04:33,389
'cause they refuse to understand.
136
00:04:33,457 --> 00:04:35,190
Which means all we got to do is
137
00:04:35,259 --> 00:04:37,426
write a song that speaks to
every kid our age, too.
138
00:04:37,495 --> 00:04:38,928
Easy. Let's do a song
139
00:04:38,996 --> 00:04:40,396
called "Grown Ups Just Don't Get It."
140
00:04:40,464 --> 00:04:41,697
That's kind of just another way
141
00:04:41,766 --> 00:04:43,399
of saying "Parents
Just Don't Understand."
142
00:04:43,467 --> 00:04:46,902
Okay, what about "Parents
Just Do Understand"?
143
00:04:46,971 --> 00:04:50,306
Yeah, but we flip it so it's
"Parents Don't Understand."
144
00:04:50,374 --> 00:04:51,573
Oh, my God.
145
00:04:51,642 --> 00:04:53,008
That's just the same song as theirs.
146
00:04:53,077 --> 00:04:54,810
Fine! Then double flip it...
147
00:04:54,879 --> 00:04:56,879
"Children Just Do Understand"!
148
00:04:56,948 --> 00:04:58,414
And what do we understand?
149
00:04:58,482 --> 00:05:00,649
That all parents don't understand.
150
00:05:00,718 --> 00:05:01,850
- We did it!
- No!
151
00:05:01,919 --> 00:05:04,153
We just keep circling back
to the same thing.
152
00:05:04,221 --> 00:05:06,121
Hey, moron, trying to eat an Eggo,
153
00:05:06,190 --> 00:05:07,790
and I can't hear myself chew.
154
00:05:07,858 --> 00:05:10,092
But we're coming up with
a multi-platinum rap single.
155
00:05:10,161 --> 00:05:11,193
I do not care.
156
00:05:11,262 --> 00:05:12,528
But we need to record a hit demo.
157
00:05:12,596 --> 00:05:13,729
Don't care.
158
00:05:13,798 --> 00:05:14,997
But there's a recording booth at the...
159
00:05:15,066 --> 00:05:16,031
- Don't care.
- BOTH: But we...
160
00:05:16,100 --> 00:05:17,433
Bup-bup. I don't care.
161
00:05:17,501 --> 00:05:18,767
- We're...
- Why don't you...
162
00:05:18,836 --> 00:05:21,971
I literally do not care.
Go out and rap to the trees.
163
00:05:22,039 --> 00:05:23,439
- Go!
- BOTH: Fine!
164
00:05:23,507 --> 00:05:25,074
In that moment, our grumpy-ass dad
165
00:05:25,142 --> 00:05:27,710
became Barry's inspiration
for our new hit single.
166
00:05:27,778 --> 00:05:29,745
Wait! That's it.
167
00:05:29,814 --> 00:05:31,981
We're not gonna do a song about parents.
168
00:05:32,049 --> 00:05:34,216
All we need is one parent.
169
00:05:34,285 --> 00:05:35,985
"Dads Just Don't Care."
170
00:05:36,053 --> 00:05:38,187
Ooh. That's so true.
171
00:05:38,255 --> 00:05:41,123
And brilliant, 'cause
your dad really doesn't care,
172
00:05:41,192 --> 00:05:42,558
'cause he's given up on life.
173
00:05:42,626 --> 00:05:44,093
JTP, drop a beat.
174
00:05:44,161 --> 00:05:46,061
Time for Fresh Prince
to bust some sick rhymes.
175
00:05:46,130 --> 00:05:47,863
And Jazzy Jeff
to listen to only one headphone
176
00:05:47,932 --> 00:05:49,732
- for some reason.
- Let's get it.
177
00:05:49,800 --> 00:05:51,533
[JTP BEATBOXING] And so we got to work
on our rap masterpiece.
178
00:05:51,602 --> 00:05:52,668
Meanwhile...
179
00:05:52,737 --> 00:05:54,203
[TIRES SCREECH]
180
00:05:54,271 --> 00:05:56,638
Geoff Schwartz, get in!
Erica's in grave danger!
181
00:05:56,707 --> 00:05:58,607
- Seriously?!
- Not yet, but she could be.
182
00:05:58,676 --> 00:06:00,743
We won't know until we call,
and by "we" I mean "you."
183
00:06:00,811 --> 00:06:02,077
Oh, God, oh, God, what's happening?!
184
00:06:02,146 --> 00:06:04,279
- Just get in the damn car!
- But my cello!
185
00:06:04,348 --> 00:06:05,447
- There's no time!
- [HORN HONKS]
186
00:06:05,516 --> 00:06:06,682
- Let's move!
- [SCREAMS]
187
00:06:06,751 --> 00:06:08,317
It was Geoff's worst nightmare...
188
00:06:08,386 --> 00:06:10,152
Erica was far away and helpless
189
00:06:10,221 --> 00:06:11,854
and obviously in great danger...
190
00:06:11,922 --> 00:06:13,422
- [TIRES SCREECH]
- I'm so scared!
191
00:06:13,491 --> 00:06:15,024
...until he realized she wasn't.
192
00:06:15,092 --> 00:06:17,993
So, just to be clear,
you want me to talk to Erica
193
00:06:18,062 --> 00:06:19,628
in front of you while you listen in?
194
00:06:19,697 --> 00:06:20,929
Don't forget this list of questions.
195
00:06:20,998 --> 00:06:22,331
Make sure to read them word for word.
196
00:06:22,400 --> 00:06:23,465
- Ooh, it's ringing.
- Wait.
197
00:06:23,534 --> 00:06:25,134
This feels a smidge super dishonest,
198
00:06:25,202 --> 00:06:27,069
and I'm not sure if I'm comfort... Hey!
199
00:06:27,138 --> 00:06:28,303
It's Geoff.
200
00:06:28,372 --> 00:06:29,738
Uh, I don't know if you're screening,
201
00:06:29,807 --> 00:06:31,073
but give me a call back, and...
202
00:06:31,142 --> 00:06:32,241
I'm here.
203
00:06:32,309 --> 00:06:33,876
Sorry, just dodging my insane mother.
204
00:06:33,944 --> 00:06:34,910
[SCOFFS] You get it.
205
00:06:34,979 --> 00:06:37,046
No! No. Totally disagree.
206
00:06:37,114 --> 00:06:38,147
She's the coolest.
207
00:06:38,215 --> 00:06:40,082
Um, okay. So, what's going on?
208
00:06:40,151 --> 00:06:42,618
Not much, just... here in my home,
209
00:06:42,686 --> 00:06:44,820
in... in my house, where...
where I sit currently,
210
00:06:44,889 --> 00:06:46,021
on my bed, i-in my room.
211
00:06:46,090 --> 00:06:47,189
Your room?
212
00:06:47,258 --> 00:06:48,624
I thought your parents
took your phone away
213
00:06:48,692 --> 00:06:50,092
because of our long-distance bills.
214
00:06:50,161 --> 00:06:51,660
I... just got a new one.
215
00:06:51,729 --> 00:06:54,997
It's yellow, and it's real.
And how are your booms?
216
00:06:55,066 --> 00:06:56,465
- What?
- Your booms.
217
00:06:56,534 --> 00:06:57,833
Are... Are... Are you going boom?
218
00:06:57,902 --> 00:06:59,401
Because a healthy girl goes boom.
219
00:06:59,470 --> 00:07:00,903
Ew. What the hell, dude?
220
00:07:00,971 --> 00:07:02,604
I'm sorry, does that mean
that you're not going boom?
221
00:07:02,673 --> 00:07:04,740
J-Just answer the question.
I'm so sorry about this!
222
00:07:04,809 --> 00:07:05,908
Forget the booms. Move on.
223
00:07:05,976 --> 00:07:07,209
Let's talk toenails.
224
00:07:07,278 --> 00:07:08,510
Are you clipping your toenails
the right way?
225
00:07:08,579 --> 00:07:11,046
Because curved clippings make ingrowns.
226
00:07:11,115 --> 00:07:12,981
- Oh, God, this is hard.
- [PHONE DIALING]
227
00:07:13,050 --> 00:07:14,283
Did someone else pick up?
228
00:07:14,351 --> 00:07:15,317
Nope. Ignore that.
229
00:07:15,386 --> 00:07:16,652
It's just me in my house alone.
230
00:07:16,720 --> 00:07:17,803
- Hello?
- Hello?
231
00:07:17,842 --> 00:07:19,194
- Hello?
- [WHISPERING] Say something!
232
00:07:19,218 --> 00:07:20,294
- Hello?
- Hello?
233
00:07:20,319 --> 00:07:23,158
- Barry?
- Did I dial you? That's so weird.
234
00:07:23,227 --> 00:07:24,293
I don't even know your number.
235
00:07:24,361 --> 00:07:25,727
What? No. Geoff dialed me.
236
00:07:25,796 --> 00:07:27,129
- Geoff?
- Yep!
237
00:07:27,198 --> 00:07:28,997
Uh... Barry's here, too,
hanging out with me in my house.
238
00:07:29,066 --> 00:07:30,099
JTP!
239
00:07:30,167 --> 00:07:31,366
Can you guys get off my line?
240
00:07:31,435 --> 00:07:33,035
I'm trying to call the library
241
00:07:33,104 --> 00:07:35,070
to find out what things
rhyme with "Father."
242
00:07:35,139 --> 00:07:36,405
"Bother"! Now get off the phone!
243
00:07:36,474 --> 00:07:38,040
- [PHONE DIALING]
- Oh, God.
244
00:07:38,109 --> 00:07:39,274
- Hello?!
- Hello?
245
00:07:39,343 --> 00:07:40,275
- Hello?
- Adam?
246
00:07:40,344 --> 00:07:41,810
Hi, Mrs. Geary, is Jackie there?
247
00:07:41,879 --> 00:07:43,345
It's Erica, dorkus.
248
00:07:43,414 --> 00:07:44,780
Why are you at Geoff's house, too?
249
00:07:44,849 --> 00:07:46,215
- Geoff's house?
- Yeah, my house!
250
00:07:46,283 --> 00:07:47,850
Go do nerd stuff at your house, Adam!
251
00:07:47,918 --> 00:07:49,251
I'm panicking.
252
00:07:49,320 --> 00:07:50,752
Keep cool and ask the questions.
253
00:07:50,821 --> 00:07:52,554
Uh, how deep are you going
254
00:07:52,623 --> 00:07:53,922
with your Q-tips
when you clean your ears?
255
00:07:53,991 --> 00:07:55,557
- Just tell me right now!
- Pretty deep, bro.
256
00:07:55,626 --> 00:07:57,493
- Not you!
- Just stop, Geoff.
257
00:07:57,561 --> 00:07:59,361
I know you're in my kitchen with my mom.
258
00:07:59,430 --> 00:08:01,763
No! No.
259
00:08:01,832 --> 00:08:04,433
I'm just, uh, here at the Schwartzes',
260
00:08:04,502 --> 00:08:06,301
having tea with Linda. Yeah.
261
00:08:06,370 --> 00:08:08,003
Our... Our lines must've gotten crossed.
262
00:08:08,072 --> 00:08:11,473
Mom, don't ever call me again!
263
00:08:11,542 --> 00:08:14,110
- Bye, Geoff.
- B-B-Bye, baby.
264
00:08:15,279 --> 00:08:17,579
Well, Geoff, you really
screwed the pooch on this.
265
00:08:17,648 --> 00:08:20,415
You know, that cello actually
belongs to the school.
266
00:08:20,484 --> 00:08:21,984
Gentlemen of the JTP.
267
00:08:22,052 --> 00:08:23,051
ALL: JTP.
268
00:08:23,120 --> 00:08:24,686
Thank you for joining us
for what will be
269
00:08:24,755 --> 00:08:27,189
the most important musical event
of your lives.
270
00:08:27,258 --> 00:08:28,635
Better than when we saw the greatest
271
00:08:28,660 --> 00:08:29,998
bands in the world play Live Aid?
272
00:08:30,037 --> 00:08:31,894
1,000%.
273
00:08:31,962 --> 00:08:35,164
- I literally stake Adam's life on it.
- Wait, what?
274
00:08:35,232 --> 00:08:38,300
[RAPPING] ♪ Now, here's
a little story about our dad ♪
275
00:08:38,369 --> 00:08:40,836
♪ He calls us morons
when he gets real mad ♪
276
00:08:40,905 --> 00:08:43,205
♪ He doesn't wear pants,
and he sits in a chair ♪
277
00:08:43,274 --> 00:08:44,406
♪ You know what I'm sayin'? ♪
278
00:08:44,475 --> 00:08:45,941
♪ Dads just don't care ♪
279
00:08:46,010 --> 00:08:48,343
♪ Oh-kay, here's the situation ♪
280
00:08:48,412 --> 00:08:50,646
♪ Our dad has a problem
with flatulation ♪
281
00:08:50,714 --> 00:08:52,948
♪ He doesn't care
about anything, for real ♪
282
00:08:53,017 --> 00:08:55,551
♪ I got an "A" on a test,
and he said, "Big deal" ♪
283
00:08:55,619 --> 00:08:57,920
♪ He has no worries, he has no fears ♪
284
00:08:57,988 --> 00:09:00,355
♪ He hasn't seen a doctor in 15 years ♪
285
00:09:00,424 --> 00:09:02,624
♪ If we come to our dad
and we need to cry ♪
286
00:09:02,693 --> 00:09:05,127
♪ He says, "You're ruining
this episode of 'Magnum, P.I.' ♪
287
00:09:05,196 --> 00:09:07,696
♪ Can't you see I'm busy and
don't wanna be bothered? ♪
288
00:09:07,765 --> 00:09:10,098
♪ Sometimes I ask God
why he made me a father ♪
289
00:09:10,167 --> 00:09:12,634
♪ Now leave me alone and go upstairs" ♪
290
00:09:12,703 --> 00:09:15,370
♪ You know what I'm sayin'?
Dads just don't care ♪
291
00:09:15,439 --> 00:09:17,839
♪ If you don't know our dad,
hey, don't worry ♪
292
00:09:17,908 --> 00:09:20,242
♪ Last name Goldberg,
first name Murray ♪
293
00:09:20,311 --> 00:09:22,711
♪ Most dads play catch
and throw around a ball ♪
294
00:09:22,780 --> 00:09:25,214
♪ But our dad doesn't care
about his kids at all ♪
295
00:09:25,282 --> 00:09:27,816
[INSTRUMENTAL MUSIC PLAYS]
296
00:09:27,885 --> 00:09:30,686
♪ M to the G berg! What a failure! ♪
297
00:09:33,023 --> 00:09:35,824
Adam! Look! We blew them away!
298
00:09:35,893 --> 00:09:38,227
Dude, I got to be honest.
299
00:09:38,295 --> 00:09:40,229
This song is very mean and hurtful.
300
00:09:40,297 --> 00:09:42,164
Yeah. I-I think what happened here is
301
00:09:42,233 --> 00:09:44,099
you two were egging
each other on in a vacuum
302
00:09:44,168 --> 00:09:45,400
and lost all perspective.
303
00:09:45,469 --> 00:09:46,668
But the good news is,
304
00:09:46,737 --> 00:09:49,004
you were smart enough
to run it by us first.
305
00:09:49,073 --> 00:09:50,572
That would have been smart,
306
00:09:50,641 --> 00:09:52,307
if we hadn't already
given our dad a copy.
307
00:09:52,376 --> 00:09:54,451
Yes. That is what we did.
308
00:09:55,446 --> 00:09:56,678
What the hell is this?
309
00:09:56,747 --> 00:09:58,213
D... Hey, look who's watched
310
00:09:58,282 --> 00:10:00,449
- a copy of our latest work in progress!
- [CHUCKLES]
311
00:10:00,517 --> 00:10:02,184
You guys think I'm a bad dad?
312
00:10:02,253 --> 00:10:04,052
Not you specifically.
313
00:10:04,121 --> 00:10:07,522
The song's called "Dads Just
Don't Care"... all dads.
314
00:10:07,591 --> 00:10:09,791
You say my first and last name.
315
00:10:09,860 --> 00:10:12,561
You're literally shoving me
into the garbage.
316
00:10:12,630 --> 00:10:14,663
True, true. We did do that.
317
00:10:14,732 --> 00:10:15,998
Come on, it's just a goof.
318
00:10:16,066 --> 00:10:19,067
We bust balls, we have fun. You get it.
319
00:10:19,136 --> 00:10:20,936
Ha. I get it.
320
00:10:21,005 --> 00:10:23,572
And you know what? Go [Bleep] yourself.
321
00:10:23,641 --> 00:10:25,707
ALL: Whoa!
322
00:10:25,776 --> 00:10:28,243
You guys think I nap because I'm lazy?
323
00:10:28,312 --> 00:10:32,848
No. I nap because I work
my [Bleep] fingers to the bone
324
00:10:32,916 --> 00:10:34,816
so you little [Bleep] can have
325
00:10:34,885 --> 00:10:36,852
your dumb [Bleep] tennis shoes
326
00:10:36,920 --> 00:10:38,954
and your expensive [Bleep] cameras.
327
00:10:39,023 --> 00:10:41,723
Uh... I feel like we should go.
328
00:10:41,792 --> 00:10:44,126
No, you little [Bleep]
need to hear this.
329
00:10:44,194 --> 00:10:46,128
That day, my dad did the one thing
330
00:10:46,196 --> 00:10:47,629
every parent wishes they could do.
331
00:10:47,698 --> 00:10:49,398
He called his kids out
332
00:10:49,466 --> 00:10:50,832
for being spoiled and ungrateful,
333
00:10:50,901 --> 00:10:53,101
pulling no punches
and speaking from the heart.
334
00:10:53,170 --> 00:10:55,604
For my dad, it was a taste of glory.
335
00:10:55,673 --> 00:10:58,340
And if you remember one thing
from this conversation,
336
00:10:58,409 --> 00:10:59,374
let it be this...
337
00:10:59,443 --> 00:11:01,476
Hee-haw-hmm!
338
00:11:01,545 --> 00:11:05,580
It seems Dad cares
a tad more than we thought.
339
00:11:05,649 --> 00:11:06,915
Yeah.
340
00:11:06,969 --> 00:11:09,326
I kind of feel we should cut
his name from the song.
341
00:11:09,622 --> 00:11:11,755
Erica may have hung up
on my mom forever,
342
00:11:11,810 --> 00:11:12,989
but little did she know,
343
00:11:13,078 --> 00:11:16,262
Beverly Goldberg
always stays on the line.
344
00:11:16,664 --> 00:11:20,266
Okay, we've got the party ball,
the Solo cups, the black lights.
345
00:11:20,333 --> 00:11:22,867
- Now we just need a theme.
- It's our first major rager,
346
00:11:22,935 --> 00:11:24,568
so we got to go, like, stupid big
347
00:11:24,637 --> 00:11:26,637
so the campus knows we mean business.
348
00:11:26,706 --> 00:11:30,441
So, I was thinking "King Tuts
and Egyptian Sluts."
349
00:11:30,510 --> 00:11:34,311
Delta Fi just did "King Tuts
and Egyptian Butts."
350
00:11:34,380 --> 00:11:35,780
Wait, I got it.
351
00:11:35,848 --> 00:11:37,815
"Girls Just Wanna Drink Rum."
352
00:11:37,884 --> 00:11:39,049
Oh, my God.
353
00:11:39,118 --> 00:11:41,085
I have, like, the best
Cyndi Lauper dress ever.
354
00:11:41,154 --> 00:11:42,520
BEVERLY: Srini?
I can't hear what she's saying?
355
00:11:42,588 --> 00:11:44,688
- [CHUCKLES]
- Get me closer!
356
00:11:44,757 --> 00:11:47,324
Is someone, like, spying on us?
357
00:11:47,393 --> 00:11:49,360
Stay here and don't speak.
358
00:11:51,493 --> 00:11:53,014
_
359
00:11:53,061 --> 00:11:53,920
__
360
00:11:53,951 --> 00:11:55,616
_
361
00:11:55,702 --> 00:11:57,327
__
362
00:11:57,374 --> 00:11:58,334
_
363
00:11:58,374 --> 00:12:00,337
Srini? Why don't I hear voices?
364
00:12:00,494 --> 00:12:02,397
_
365
00:12:02,483 --> 00:12:04,022
__
366
00:12:04,077 --> 00:12:06,374
What's happening?
This silence is killing me.
367
00:12:06,467 --> 00:12:07,694
_
368
00:12:07,741 --> 00:12:09,457
__
369
00:12:09,512 --> 00:12:12,262
_
370
00:12:12,309 --> 00:12:13,754
__
371
00:12:13,801 --> 00:12:15,252
_
372
00:12:15,307 --> 00:12:17,621
Hi! Sorry for the silence.
373
00:12:17,690 --> 00:12:20,791
It's 'cause Erica started to, uh, sleep.
374
00:12:20,860 --> 00:12:21,992
Sleep? It's only 8:00.
375
00:12:22,061 --> 00:12:24,094
See? You worry for nothing, lady.
376
00:12:24,163 --> 00:12:26,030
Anyway, I'm co-hosting a party,
and I have to go.
377
00:12:26,098 --> 00:12:27,465
Did she get you on her side
378
00:12:27,533 --> 00:12:29,166
by offering to let you
co-host her party?
379
00:12:29,619 --> 00:12:31,319
_
380
00:12:32,672 --> 00:12:34,238
Srini, what is she doing to me?!
381
00:12:34,307 --> 00:12:36,106
Damn it. [EXHALES SHARPLY]
382
00:12:36,175 --> 00:12:37,808
Murray, Erica's throwing a party.
383
00:12:37,877 --> 00:12:39,944
And I'm spinning out.
We all got our stuff.
384
00:12:40,012 --> 00:12:42,880
Donahue did a show about
the horrors of college ragers.
385
00:12:42,949 --> 00:12:45,449
Did you know that a keg
can roll over a kid
386
00:12:45,518 --> 00:12:47,651
just like the boulder
in "Indiana Jones"?
387
00:12:47,720 --> 00:12:50,154
- What should I do?
- Don't ask me.
388
00:12:50,223 --> 00:12:53,624
The boys just wrote a song
about what a garbage dad I am.
389
00:12:53,693 --> 00:12:55,893
Oh, please, stop overreacting.
390
00:12:55,962 --> 00:12:57,027
Now, where are my keys?
391
00:12:57,096 --> 00:12:58,996
I got to drive to D.C. and save Erica
392
00:12:59,065 --> 00:13:00,831
before Donahue does a special on her.
393
00:13:00,900 --> 00:13:03,000
ADULT ADAM: While my mom
overreacted in a blind panic,
394
00:13:03,069 --> 00:13:05,870
Barry's eyes still hadn't been
opened by Dad's angry rant.
395
00:13:05,938 --> 00:13:07,304
What up, JTP?
396
00:13:07,373 --> 00:13:08,772
- Uh... JTP.
- BOTH: JTP.
397
00:13:08,841 --> 00:13:10,241
Okay, what's the deal?
398
00:13:10,309 --> 00:13:13,043
Your "JTPs" have been
low-energy all week.
399
00:13:13,112 --> 00:13:14,211
When your dad chewed you out
400
00:13:14,280 --> 00:13:16,013
with those R-rated Richard Pryor words,
401
00:13:16,082 --> 00:13:18,449
it, like, changed us.
402
00:13:18,518 --> 00:13:20,150
Yeah. I realized my old man's
403
00:13:20,219 --> 00:13:21,619
more than just a landscaper
404
00:13:21,687 --> 00:13:24,288
who punches holes in the wall
when the Eagles lose.
405
00:13:24,357 --> 00:13:25,422
He's a hero.
406
00:13:25,491 --> 00:13:26,724
This morning, as my dad
407
00:13:26,792 --> 00:13:28,859
was leaving for his desk job
at the bank...
408
00:13:28,928 --> 00:13:31,295
I just hugged him so tight.
409
00:13:31,364 --> 00:13:32,630
I got my dad flowers,
410
00:13:32,698 --> 00:13:34,198
and he was like,
"What's wrong with you?!"
411
00:13:34,267 --> 00:13:36,634
And I was like, "I see you."
412
00:13:36,702 --> 00:13:38,903
And then he broke down crying
in his car.
413
00:13:38,971 --> 00:13:41,012
What is happening right now?!
414
00:13:41,051 --> 00:13:42,517
I'll tell you what's happening.
415
00:13:42,586 --> 00:13:44,086
You have to apologize to your dad.
416
00:13:44,154 --> 00:13:45,320
You guys are right.
417
00:13:45,389 --> 00:13:46,988
Our only choice is to suck it up
418
00:13:47,057 --> 00:13:49,391
and do the mature thing...
write another rap.
419
00:13:49,460 --> 00:13:50,826
You sure, Bar?
420
00:13:50,894 --> 00:13:52,861
Maybe we should just be
a normal family this one time
421
00:13:52,930 --> 00:13:54,363
- and say "sorry"?
- Never.
422
00:13:54,431 --> 00:13:57,366
Think about it... What better
way to get us out of trouble
423
00:13:57,434 --> 00:14:01,136
than to do the exact same thing
that got us into trouble?
424
00:14:01,205 --> 00:14:03,872
So we rap about the ways
Dad doesn't totally suck?
425
00:14:03,941 --> 00:14:07,376
I'm on it, DJ.
Drop an apology beat, JTP.
426
00:14:07,444 --> 00:14:09,211
We all really think
you should just say "sorry."
427
00:14:09,279 --> 00:14:11,213
- Right now.
- Okay.
428
00:14:11,281 --> 00:14:12,289
[JTP BEATBOXING]
429
00:14:12,344 --> 00:14:13,915
And so Barry whipped up a hot new verse.
430
00:14:13,984 --> 00:14:15,317
Meanwhile, my sister's
431
00:14:15,386 --> 00:14:17,252
wild "Girls Just Wanna Drink Rum" party
432
00:14:17,321 --> 00:14:19,287
was out of control.
433
00:14:19,356 --> 00:14:21,123
It was wall-to-wall Cyndi Laupers
434
00:14:21,191 --> 00:14:22,791
grinding on drunk frat boys
435
00:14:22,860 --> 00:14:26,128
dressed as her MTV music-video
sidekick Captain Lou Albano.
436
00:14:26,196 --> 00:14:28,063
I'm gonna live forever!
437
00:14:28,132 --> 00:14:29,531
- [CROWD CHEERS]
- Whoo!
438
00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:30,675
[Cyndi Lauper's "Girls Just
Want to Have Fun" plays]
439
00:14:30,738 --> 00:14:32,734
This party is out of control, Erica.
440
00:14:32,803 --> 00:14:34,336
How many people did you invite?
441
00:14:34,405 --> 00:14:36,738
Who cares? Let's get gro-o-o-ss!
442
00:14:36,807 --> 00:14:39,241
Come on! Someone stole all of our CDs
443
00:14:39,309 --> 00:14:40,876
and punched a hole through our wall.
444
00:14:40,944 --> 00:14:42,611
We got to shut this down.
445
00:14:42,679 --> 00:14:46,815
As if. Let's do things tonight
we'll regret tomorrow!
446
00:14:46,884 --> 00:14:49,451
ALL: Girls just wanna drink rum!
447
00:14:49,520 --> 00:14:50,585
W-What did she say?
448
00:14:50,654 --> 00:14:52,087
"Girls wanna drink rum?" or "have fun"?
449
00:14:52,156 --> 00:14:53,355
What? Ew! Gross.
450
00:14:53,424 --> 00:14:54,523
Stop it. Ohh!
451
00:14:54,591 --> 00:14:57,058
Loose keg. Donahue was right.
452
00:14:57,127 --> 00:14:58,860
Mama's comin', baby.
453
00:14:58,929 --> 00:15:01,096
Erica, you need to get down.
454
00:15:01,165 --> 00:15:02,764
Oh, my God. Listen to yourself.
455
00:15:02,833 --> 00:15:04,332
You sound just like a mom.
456
00:15:04,401 --> 00:15:05,967
Yep, Erica would hate to admit it,
457
00:15:06,036 --> 00:15:08,470
but she couldn't help
but go into full Bev Mode.
458
00:15:08,539 --> 00:15:09,771
Enough.
459
00:15:09,840 --> 00:15:11,673
My neighbor's gardener's son
fell off of a dresser,
460
00:15:11,742 --> 00:15:13,775
and now he spends his whole life
with a comfort dog.
461
00:15:13,844 --> 00:15:15,210
It's true.
462
00:15:15,279 --> 00:15:16,778
He also does swim therapy
463
00:15:16,847 --> 00:15:18,647
and fist fights with his own shadow.
464
00:15:18,715 --> 00:15:19,781
Hi, sweet face.
465
00:15:19,850 --> 00:15:21,516
Mom, what the hell are you doing here?!
466
00:15:21,585 --> 00:15:23,785
Worrying! And it's a good thing I was,
467
00:15:23,854 --> 00:15:25,720
because this party is out of hand.
468
00:15:25,789 --> 00:15:28,190
You have to stop calling
and worrying all the time.
469
00:15:28,258 --> 00:15:32,327
I just need to know that you are
safe and snug and okay.
470
00:15:32,396 --> 00:15:35,363
Everything is 100% fine.
471
00:15:35,432 --> 00:15:37,199
[MUSIC STOPS]
472
00:15:41,238 --> 00:15:42,938
Someone broke the dresser.
473
00:15:43,006 --> 00:15:44,840
It was me.
474
00:15:44,908 --> 00:15:46,875
As Erica finally
broke through to our mom,
475
00:15:46,944 --> 00:15:49,811
me and Barry were ready
to bust out our latest apology.
476
00:15:49,880 --> 00:15:51,446
Hello, Father. We see you're enjoying
477
00:15:51,515 --> 00:15:53,915
your nightly snack of Snyder's
hard pretzels and milk.
478
00:15:53,984 --> 00:15:55,417
However, we'd like a moment.
479
00:15:55,486 --> 00:15:58,186
As you know, yesterday
some things were said...
480
00:15:58,255 --> 00:16:00,956
mostly by you in a mean, shouty way...
481
00:16:01,024 --> 00:16:02,357
but we're here to make it better
482
00:16:02,426 --> 00:16:04,359
through the healing power of rap.
483
00:16:04,428 --> 00:16:05,961
It's fine. Just drop it.
484
00:16:06,029 --> 00:16:07,829
"Drop a fresh beat," you mean.
485
00:16:07,898 --> 00:16:11,933
DJ Ad, play our latest video
for our hero M to the G.
486
00:16:12,002 --> 00:16:13,368
[RAP MUSIC PLAYS]
487
00:16:13,437 --> 00:16:15,837
[RAPPING] ♪ Oh-kay,
here's the situation ♪
488
00:16:15,906 --> 00:16:18,206
♪ We may have made
a few harsh accusations ♪
489
00:16:18,275 --> 00:16:20,609
♪ But our dad cares about us
in many ways ♪
490
00:16:20,677 --> 00:16:23,011
♪ When we go out to eat,
he's the guy who pays ♪
491
00:16:23,080 --> 00:16:25,580
♪ And he buys us clothes
and books and more ♪
492
00:16:25,649 --> 00:16:27,949
♪ He'll even buy the stuff
that we break in a store ♪
493
00:16:28,018 --> 00:16:30,552
♪ When it comes to spending big,
our dad's no fool ♪
494
00:16:30,621 --> 00:16:32,687
♪ That's why he put us both
in private school ♪
495
00:16:32,756 --> 00:16:34,389
♪
496
00:16:34,458 --> 00:16:36,391
BOTH: ♪ Our dad pays for stuff! ♪
497
00:16:36,460 --> 00:16:39,059
After those super-kind rhymes,
our dad was sure to forgive us.
498
00:16:39,114 --> 00:16:40,121
Mm, no.
499
00:16:40,178 --> 00:16:41,223
- No?!
- No?!
500
00:16:41,270 --> 00:16:42,497
The only nice thing you can say about me
501
00:16:42,566 --> 00:16:43,765
is that I pay for stuff?
502
00:16:43,834 --> 00:16:44,866
What am I, a bank?
503
00:16:44,935 --> 00:16:46,134
Banks are awesome.
504
00:16:46,203 --> 00:16:48,403
They have unlimited money and lollipops.
505
00:16:48,472 --> 00:16:49,938
I know what a bank is!
506
00:16:50,007 --> 00:16:52,140
All the tellers are named Debbie.
507
00:16:52,209 --> 00:16:54,609
They can turn your dollar bills
into coins.
508
00:16:54,678 --> 00:16:56,144
Can we stop talking about banks?
509
00:16:56,213 --> 00:16:57,612
I'm good. I don't care.
510
00:16:57,681 --> 00:16:59,247
But you do care. That's clear now.
511
00:16:59,316 --> 00:17:01,383
Look, I had a dad
who really didn't care...
512
00:17:01,451 --> 00:17:04,386
about me, my brother,
pretty much anything.
513
00:17:04,454 --> 00:17:06,454
I just hated him for it.
514
00:17:06,523 --> 00:17:08,657
When you guys were born,
I promised myself
515
00:17:08,725 --> 00:17:10,692
I'd do anything not to turn into him.
516
00:17:10,761 --> 00:17:13,595
And if this is how you see me,
I guess I did.
517
00:17:13,664 --> 00:17:14,896
[SIGHS]
518
00:17:14,965 --> 00:17:16,064
[EXHALES SHARPLY]
519
00:17:16,838 --> 00:17:18,478
We had insulted our dad yet again,
520
00:17:18,517 --> 00:17:21,040
so Barry and I took one
last shot at saying sorry.
521
00:17:21,088 --> 00:17:23,173
Hello, Father. We see you're enjoying
522
00:17:23,205 --> 00:17:25,372
your morning meal
of Steak-umms and eggs.
523
00:17:25,441 --> 00:17:27,107
However, we'd like
a moment of your time.
524
00:17:27,201 --> 00:17:28,900
No, damn it. Move it along.
525
00:17:28,969 --> 00:17:31,870
Don't worry, we're not busting
any sweet rhymes this time.
526
00:17:31,939 --> 00:17:33,238
We're just gonna speak from the heart.
527
00:17:33,307 --> 00:17:34,439
That sounds worse.
528
00:17:34,508 --> 00:17:36,308
Look, are you the perfect father?
529
00:17:36,377 --> 00:17:37,809
Not even close.
530
00:17:37,878 --> 00:17:40,379
You're way too loud.
You're constantly aggravated.
531
00:17:40,447 --> 00:17:41,780
You're super gassy.
532
00:17:41,849 --> 00:17:43,849
You once fell asleep during
a parent-teacher conference.
533
00:17:43,917 --> 00:17:45,784
You once fell asleep
at Thanksgiving dinner.
534
00:17:45,853 --> 00:17:48,220
You fell asleep at a stoplight
many times.
535
00:17:48,289 --> 00:17:50,389
You've got a real problem
with sleep, man.
536
00:17:50,433 --> 00:17:51,976
Are you done with your apology?
537
00:17:52,023 --> 00:17:55,169
No. You may be all those
things, but you're also
538
00:17:55,262 --> 00:17:57,529
the most dependable dad
any kid could ask for.
539
00:17:57,598 --> 00:17:59,398
We know, at the end of every day,
540
00:17:59,466 --> 00:18:01,533
you're gonna be there in that chair,
541
00:18:01,602 --> 00:18:03,101
without pants on,
542
00:18:03,170 --> 00:18:05,604
making sure we have food and clothes
543
00:18:05,673 --> 00:18:07,306
and whatever stupid thing we want.
544
00:18:07,374 --> 00:18:09,174
We know you're always gonna
protect us...
545
00:18:09,243 --> 00:18:12,911
from the world, from ourselves,
from anything bad.
546
00:18:12,980 --> 00:18:15,714
And no, you're not perfect,
but you're our dad.
547
00:18:15,783 --> 00:18:17,249
And we love you.
548
00:18:17,318 --> 00:18:19,628
Let's just forget about this
and move on.
549
00:18:19,689 --> 00:18:20,755
♪ My father yells ♪
550
00:18:20,816 --> 00:18:25,292
♪ "What you gonna do with your life?"
551
00:18:25,392 --> 00:18:27,793
- You okay?
- ♪ Oh, Daddy dear ♪
552
00:18:27,861 --> 00:18:29,094
Get out of here.
553
00:18:29,163 --> 00:18:30,729
Or we could give you a big hug.
554
00:18:30,798 --> 00:18:31,830
Do not hug me.
555
00:18:31,899 --> 00:18:34,466
Don't. What?
556
00:18:34,535 --> 00:18:36,935
♪ But girls just wanna have fun ♪
557
00:18:37,004 --> 00:18:40,972
- You guys are morons.
- We know.
558
00:18:41,041 --> 00:18:43,108
Turns out, we didn't need some epic song
559
00:18:43,177 --> 00:18:44,321
to win our dad back.
560
00:18:44,360 --> 00:18:46,594
As for our mom,
she finally was able to see
561
00:18:46,664 --> 00:18:48,931
that perhaps she didn't need
to worry so much.
562
00:18:48,999 --> 00:18:52,301
Here, try Bevy's secret hangover recipe.
563
00:18:52,369 --> 00:18:53,869
Why does it smell like fish?
564
00:18:53,938 --> 00:18:55,137
That's the shrimp.
565
00:18:55,206 --> 00:18:57,105
It's the aspirin of the sea. Drink up.
566
00:18:57,174 --> 00:18:58,941
You're, like, the best mom ever.
567
00:18:59,009 --> 00:19:01,043
In that moment, my sister realized
568
00:19:01,111 --> 00:19:02,444
she really was lucky to have a mom
569
00:19:02,513 --> 00:19:04,246
always waiting
on the other side of the phone.
570
00:19:04,315 --> 00:19:06,048
Well, I guess you were right
571
00:19:06,116 --> 00:19:08,283
to come up here and check in
on what an idiot I am.
572
00:19:08,352 --> 00:19:10,552
No. You were the only one
573
00:19:10,621 --> 00:19:12,154
taking care of things around here.
574
00:19:12,223 --> 00:19:14,489
I was so worried at the party
last night.
575
00:19:15,893 --> 00:19:17,859
And if that's even a fraction
of what you feel for me...
576
00:19:17,928 --> 00:19:19,828
...then I'm sorry.
577
00:19:19,897 --> 00:19:22,497
Look, all I want is
to know that you're okay.
578
00:19:22,566 --> 00:19:25,601
So how 'bout this? One call a night.
579
00:19:25,669 --> 00:19:28,136
All you have to say is,
"Mama, I'm good."
580
00:19:28,205 --> 00:19:30,172
That's it? Just three words?
581
00:19:30,241 --> 00:19:32,074
Honestly, that is all I need.
582
00:19:32,142 --> 00:19:34,509
I think I can swing that.
583
00:19:34,578 --> 00:19:37,946
Truth is, it's not the parents
that don't understand.
584
00:19:38,015 --> 00:19:39,414
It's us kids who don't get
585
00:19:39,483 --> 00:19:40,449
where our parents are coming from
586
00:19:40,517 --> 00:19:41,817
and how hard it can be.
587
00:19:41,885 --> 00:19:43,252
Now that you know we love you,
588
00:19:43,320 --> 00:19:46,688
just admit it... our video's awesome.
589
00:19:46,757 --> 00:19:49,661
- It's all right.
- ♪ Hide her away... ♪
590
00:19:49,700 --> 00:19:51,560
In the end, the best way
to be understood...
591
00:19:51,629 --> 00:19:53,495
[PHONE RINGS] ...is just to let
your family know you care,
592
00:19:53,564 --> 00:19:54,596
even if it's just a quick check-in.
593
00:19:54,665 --> 00:19:55,864
Hello?
594
00:19:55,933 --> 00:19:57,466
Mama, I'm good.
595
00:19:57,534 --> 00:19:59,591
Goodnight.
596
00:19:59,660 --> 00:20:00,857
Night.
597
00:20:01,130 --> 00:20:03,071
'Cause we can all sleep easy
knowing there's
598
00:20:03,140 --> 00:20:06,108
someone out there who loves us
no matter what time it is.
599
00:20:06,176 --> 00:20:09,274
♪
600
00:20:09,329 --> 00:20:11,587
_
601
00:20:11,641 --> 00:20:13,548
- [BEEP]
- BEVERLY: Adam, it's Mom. Give me a call.
602
00:20:13,617 --> 00:20:14,983
- [BEEP]
- Call me back.
603
00:20:15,052 --> 00:20:16,385
- [BEEP]
- I'm worried to death.
604
00:20:16,453 --> 00:20:18,186
- [BEEP]
- Call me immediately.
605
00:20:18,255 --> 00:20:20,222
- [BEEP]
- I haven't spoken to you all day.
606
00:20:20,291 --> 00:20:22,324
- [BEEP]
- I didn't sleep all last night.
607
00:20:22,393 --> 00:20:23,825
- [BEEP]
- If I don't hear from you soon,
608
00:20:23,894 --> 00:20:25,494
I'm getting on the next plane.
609
00:20:25,562 --> 00:20:28,030
[BEEP] Remember me, the woman
that gave birth to you?
610
00:20:28,098 --> 00:20:29,564
- [BEEP]
- I love you.
611
00:20:29,633 --> 00:20:32,177
It's your mom, and I'm
looking at plane tickets now.
612
00:20:32,264 --> 00:20:33,607
BARRY: It's finally here...
613
00:20:33,639 --> 00:20:36,162
"The Goldbergs Mixtape,"
our first album,
614
00:20:36,209 --> 00:20:38,538
including classic hits
like "Ferris Wheel."
615
00:20:38,585 --> 00:20:39,892
♪ Ferris wheel, Ferris, Ferris wheel ♪
616
00:20:39,937 --> 00:20:41,070
- ["LOVE NINJA" PLAYS]
- Plus "Love Ninja,"
617
00:20:41,172 --> 00:20:43,072
"Eternal Flame," "Barry is the Man,"
618
00:20:43,174 --> 00:20:44,206
"Bad Boy, Good Guy,"
619
00:20:44,308 --> 00:20:45,608
"Judah Macabee, Dinosaur Hunter,"
620
00:20:45,710 --> 00:20:47,476
the awesome cover of "Tom Sawyer,"
621
00:20:47,578 --> 00:20:49,345
"We're Playing D & D" by Kurtis Blow,
622
00:20:49,447 --> 00:20:53,082
and many other awesome songs
that mock our super-lazy father.
623
00:20:53,184 --> 00:20:54,583
So wake up and buy it now!
624
00:20:54,685 --> 00:20:55,718
[SNORTS]
625
00:20:55,820 --> 00:20:56,852
[SIGHS, CLEARS THROAT]
626
00:20:56,954 --> 00:21:00,655
Ah. [SIGHS]47049
Can't find what you're looking for?
Get subtitles in any language from opensubtitles.com, and translate them here.
Afrikaans
Albanian
Amharic
Arabic
Armenian
Azerbaijani
Basque
Belarusian
Bengali
Bosnian
Bulgarian
Catalan
Cebuano
Chichewa
Chinese (Simplified)
Chinese (Traditional)
Corsican
Croatian
Czech
Danish
Dutch
English
Esperanto
Estonian
Finnish
French
Frisian
Galician
Georgian
German
Greek
Gujarati
Haitian Creole
Hawaiian
Hungarian
Icelandic
Indonesian
Irish
Italian
Japanese
Kazakh
Khmer
Korean
Kurdish (Kurmanji)
Kyrgyz
Lao
Latvian
Lithuanian
Luxembourgish
Macedonian
Malagasy
Malay
Maltese
Maori
Mongolian
Myanmar (Burmese)
Nepali
Norwegian
Pashto
Polish
Portuguese
Romanian
Russian
Samoan
Serbian
Sesotho
Shona
Sinhala
Slovak
Slovenian
Somali
Swahili
Swedish
Tajik
Thai
Turkish
Ukrainian
Urdu
Uzbek
Vietnamese
