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Every seventh year
is a Year of the Moon.
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00:01:22,540 --> 00:01:26,315
People whose lives are strongly
influenced by their emotions
3
00:01:26,413 --> 00:01:30,788
suffer more intensely from
depressions in these years.
4
00:01:30,893 --> 00:01:35,432
To a lesser degree, this is also
true of years with 13 new moons.
5
00:01:35,532 --> 00:01:40,322
When a Moon Year
also has 13 new moons
6
00:01:40,428 --> 00:01:45,185
inescapable personal
tragedies may occur.
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00:01:45,293 --> 00:01:50,049
In the 20th century, this dangerous
constellation occurs six times.
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00:01:50,157 --> 00:01:54,914
One of these is 1978;
9
00:01:55,053 --> 00:01:59,787
before that,
1908, 1929, 1943 and 1957.
10
00:01:59,949 --> 00:02:04,705
1992 will also be a year in which
many people's lives are threatened.
11
00:02:19,852 --> 00:02:22,569
Volker Spengler as
Elvira Weisshaupt in
12
00:02:22,668 --> 00:02:28,036
IN A YEAR WITH 13 MOONS
13
00:03:45,324 --> 00:03:46,753
What's up here?
14
00:03:50,892 --> 00:03:53,413
He's not a john.
He's a woman, he says.
15
00:04:30,029 --> 00:04:31,206
Stop it!
16
00:04:46,668 --> 00:04:49,865
With the
collaboration of
17
00:05:25,836 --> 00:05:28,487
Men hover 'round me
18
00:05:28,589 --> 00:05:30,956
like moths 'round a flame
19
00:05:31,052 --> 00:05:34,282
And when they get burnt
20
00:05:34,380 --> 00:05:36,682
good that no one knows my game
21
00:05:36,812 --> 00:05:39,595
Rumpelstiltskin is my name
22
00:05:39,692 --> 00:05:42,988
On the Volga's banks
a soldier stands
23
00:05:43,756 --> 00:05:46,985
Keeping watch for his fatherland
24
00:05:48,076 --> 00:05:52,866
Standing on the battlements,
looking down with pleasure on...
25
00:06:07,212 --> 00:06:08,325
Elvira?
26
00:06:09,068 --> 00:06:12,363
I didn't know you'd be here.
27
00:06:14,380 --> 00:06:16,169
It's been six weeks
28
00:06:16,268 --> 00:06:18,440
Six weeks! That's 42 days...
29
00:06:18,540 --> 00:06:21,704
Or 1008 hours.
I can count for myself.
30
00:06:21,804 --> 00:06:23,626
Is that all that occurs to you?
31
00:06:23,724 --> 00:06:25,284
No, of course not.
32
00:06:25,708 --> 00:06:27,268
How stupid of me!
33
00:06:28,013 --> 00:06:29,420
I'm so sorry.
34
00:06:29,516 --> 00:06:31,589
I bet you mean my...
35
00:06:31,693 --> 00:06:34,180
my outfit.
36
00:06:37,164 --> 00:06:39,236
You're probably wondering...
37
00:06:39,404 --> 00:06:40,614
why I'm...
38
00:06:40,748 --> 00:06:42,373
You're drunk again.
39
00:06:42,636 --> 00:06:43,716
Drunk?
40
00:06:44,524 --> 00:06:46,499
No, darling. I'm not drunk.
41
00:06:47,020 --> 00:06:48,481
On the contrary...
42
00:06:49,804 --> 00:06:51,298
I'm just lonely.
43
00:06:52,461 --> 00:06:54,981
Yes, I'm lonely, and I...
44
00:06:55,084 --> 00:06:56,513
Stop screaming!
45
00:06:57,613 --> 00:06:59,914
When you're in the wrong
you always start screaming.
46
00:07:02,317 --> 00:07:05,633
Me, in the wrong?
47
00:07:07,084 --> 00:07:09,386
You, of all people, accuse me?
48
00:07:09,868 --> 00:07:11,297
No, my friend,
49
00:07:11,788 --> 00:07:13,675
I am not in the wrong.
50
00:07:13,868 --> 00:07:15,756
You left me in the lurch.
51
00:07:16,109 --> 00:07:19,458
I've been sitting here for weeks,
till I felt quite claustrophobic,
52
00:07:19,597 --> 00:07:21,604
staring at the phone...
53
00:07:21,708 --> 00:07:25,124
till I could hardly see anymore,
till my brain went numb.
54
00:07:29,484 --> 00:07:31,819
No, the only thing I did wrong
55
00:07:32,108 --> 00:07:33,635
was to yearn
56
00:07:34,732 --> 00:07:37,482
for someone to caress me
57
00:07:38,252 --> 00:07:39,594
and kiss me.
58
00:07:40,780 --> 00:07:42,568
Caress you? Kiss you?
59
00:07:42,668 --> 00:07:44,195
You have nothing
but jam in your head.
60
00:07:44,332 --> 00:07:46,088
Caress you? Don't make me laugh!
61
00:07:46,220 --> 00:07:49,516
Look at yourself in the mirror!
62
00:07:49,709 --> 00:07:50,691
Don't, Christoph!
63
00:07:50,828 --> 00:07:54,144
Look at yourself in the mirror!
64
00:07:54,476 --> 00:07:56,647
Christoph, please, please.
65
00:07:56,748 --> 00:07:58,373
I'm scared.
66
00:07:58,476 --> 00:08:00,778
What are you scared of?
67
00:08:01,004 --> 00:08:03,786
Of you. Today, you're so...
68
00:08:04,013 --> 00:08:06,020
You know what you're afraid of?
69
00:08:06,124 --> 00:08:08,710
Your own ugly mug.
70
00:08:08,813 --> 00:08:10,667
Look at yourself in the mirror!
71
00:08:10,764 --> 00:08:13,579
I'm afraid...
72
00:08:15,308 --> 00:08:16,650
Open your eyes.
73
00:08:16,780 --> 00:08:18,438
Christoph, please...
74
00:08:19,052 --> 00:08:20,940
Look at yourself, Elvira.
75
00:08:21,452 --> 00:08:23,907
Look,
or I'll smash your teeth in.
76
00:08:25,356 --> 00:08:27,778
Look at yourself.
77
00:08:29,164 --> 00:08:33,474
Do you see now
why I don't come home anymore?
78
00:08:34,508 --> 00:08:36,396
I see myself loving you.
79
00:08:38,860 --> 00:08:41,315
So that's why you drink
and get fatter and fatter
80
00:08:41,420 --> 00:08:43,842
till your face revolts me
81
00:08:43,948 --> 00:08:46,534
like a contagious disease,
like leprosy.
82
00:08:47,116 --> 00:08:49,123
I never wanted to hurt you.
83
00:08:57,068 --> 00:09:00,384
Ugh! You're not even funny.
You're just repulsive.
84
00:09:00,492 --> 00:09:03,427
You're a fat, revolting,
superfluous lump of meat.
85
00:09:03,533 --> 00:09:04,939
And you know why?
86
00:09:05,036 --> 00:09:06,891
Because you have
no will of your own
87
00:09:06,988 --> 00:09:10,217
no initiative, no brain.
You've no imagination.
88
00:09:10,316 --> 00:09:13,632
- You're not interested in anything.
- That's not true.
89
00:09:13,741 --> 00:09:16,010
I've always searched
for something like a soul.
90
00:09:16,108 --> 00:09:18,694
Something like you
doesn't have a soul.
91
00:09:18,796 --> 00:09:21,000
You're just a thing, an object
92
00:09:22,092 --> 00:09:23,914
completely superfluous.
93
00:09:24,684 --> 00:09:27,881
Nobody would notice
if you ceased to exist.
94
00:09:27,980 --> 00:09:29,868
Splat! And gone!
95
00:09:30,156 --> 00:09:33,768
Somebody should step on you
and squash you like a bug.
96
00:09:33,868 --> 00:09:37,097
Christoph, stop it!
Help! You're hurting me.
97
00:09:37,196 --> 00:09:40,327
Stop screaming! Do you want
the whole building to hear?
98
00:09:43,980 --> 00:09:45,769
This is my apartment, Christoph,
99
00:09:45,868 --> 00:09:48,137
and I can do what I like in it.
100
00:09:48,236 --> 00:09:51,946
- So it's your apartment, is it?
- Yes, my apartment.
101
00:09:52,364 --> 00:09:53,924
Mine, mine, mine!
102
00:09:54,348 --> 00:09:56,552
Okay, have it your way, Elvira.
103
00:09:57,132 --> 00:09:59,434
It had to happen sooner or later.
104
00:09:59,980 --> 00:10:01,256
God knows
105
00:10:01,996 --> 00:10:03,905
rather sooner than later.
106
00:10:07,372 --> 00:10:08,866
What's the matter?
107
00:10:08,972 --> 00:10:10,401
Say something.
108
00:10:10,828 --> 00:10:12,552
Nothing. I'm packing.
109
00:10:12,716 --> 00:10:13,893
Packing?
110
00:10:16,172 --> 00:10:17,798
But you've only just come home.
111
00:10:17,900 --> 00:10:21,217
If this is your apartment,
I can't have come home.
112
00:10:22,220 --> 00:10:24,456
I must be
at the wrong address.
113
00:10:24,620 --> 00:10:25,668
Sorry.
114
00:10:25,804 --> 00:10:28,171
You know I didn't mean
it like that.
115
00:10:28,652 --> 00:10:33,322
You know how I really feel.
116
00:10:33,452 --> 00:10:36,714
That's the thanks I get
for trying so hard all these years.
117
00:10:36,812 --> 00:10:39,845
I just couldn't get it into my
head you're not a real woman...
118
00:10:39,948 --> 00:10:41,736
You said you loved me
119
00:10:41,836 --> 00:10:44,258
and you knew about it
long before you said that.
120
00:10:45,068 --> 00:10:47,719
No one could know
what would happen to you
121
00:10:47,820 --> 00:10:49,795
that you'd become such a mess
122
00:10:49,900 --> 00:10:52,005
that you'd turn out to be
more than just a man
123
00:10:52,108 --> 00:10:54,280
big and blubbery like a walrus
124
00:10:55,148 --> 00:10:58,464
that your brain
would grow emptier and emptier
125
00:10:59,212 --> 00:11:03,816
and shrink
to a spongy mass of nothing.
126
00:11:04,204 --> 00:11:06,440
Don't talk like that, Christoph.
127
00:11:06,956 --> 00:11:08,385
Not like that.
128
00:11:10,380 --> 00:11:14,439
I'm so afraid
you'll ruin everything
129
00:11:14,732 --> 00:11:15,976
Everything.
130
00:11:16,076 --> 00:11:17,253
Oh no, Elvira.
131
00:11:17,356 --> 00:11:19,690
Stop kidding yourself!
132
00:11:21,740 --> 00:11:24,325
There's nothing left to ruin.
133
00:11:25,036 --> 00:11:27,753
It's been going on a long time.
134
00:11:27,852 --> 00:11:30,405
I feel like throwing up
when I touch you.
135
00:11:31,052 --> 00:11:32,678
I feel so nauseated
136
00:11:32,972 --> 00:11:36,038
I'd rather spend
the weekend in an empty hotel
137
00:11:36,172 --> 00:11:37,995
than come home to you.
138
00:11:38,700 --> 00:11:40,740
You don't mean what you say.
139
00:11:46,444 --> 00:11:49,127
Beat it! Let me finish packing!
140
00:11:49,772 --> 00:11:52,138
Leave me alone! Once and for all!
141
00:11:52,236 --> 00:11:56,262
- Go brush your teeth, for all I care.
- You've been lonely in life, too.
142
00:11:56,364 --> 00:11:58,503
- Now you behave as if...
- well?
143
00:11:58,924 --> 00:12:00,582
Did I ever deny it?
144
00:12:00,780 --> 00:12:01,828
Did I?
145
00:12:02,604 --> 00:12:04,392
No. On the contrary.
146
00:12:04,652 --> 00:12:06,627
But I didn't let myself go.
147
00:12:09,996 --> 00:12:12,232
Of course not. You never had to.
148
00:12:12,684 --> 00:12:14,178
I was always there for you.
149
00:12:14,284 --> 00:12:17,186
Do you want me to spend my life
groveling on my knees before you?
150
00:12:17,292 --> 00:12:18,502
No one asked you to do that.
151
00:12:18,604 --> 00:12:22,532
No, but you behave as if I had
to pay off some huge debt.
152
00:12:23,148 --> 00:12:24,970
My God, you're so unfair.
153
00:12:25,068 --> 00:12:28,417
I never said anything like that.
I never even thought it.
154
00:12:29,036 --> 00:12:32,069
You don't think. You've nothing
but jam in your head.
155
00:12:32,204 --> 00:12:35,238
- You said that before.
- I know, because it's true.
156
00:12:36,268 --> 00:12:37,250
Jam.
157
00:12:38,028 --> 00:12:40,264
It sticks your eyelids together.
158
00:12:41,676 --> 00:12:43,498
It's rancid and it stinks.
159
00:12:44,587 --> 00:12:47,402
It smells of putrefaction
when you're around
160
00:12:47,884 --> 00:12:49,542
of decay and death.
161
00:12:50,444 --> 00:12:51,873
That's why
162
00:12:51,980 --> 00:12:53,540
you need alcohol.
163
00:12:53,772 --> 00:12:57,384
What have I done to you
that you have to hurt me like this?
164
00:12:57,484 --> 00:12:58,432
What have I done?
165
00:12:58,540 --> 00:13:01,606
Is it because
I was the one who helped you
166
00:13:01,708 --> 00:13:04,261
recover your self-respect?
167
00:13:05,580 --> 00:13:07,238
Think what you like.
168
00:13:07,724 --> 00:13:09,961
Do what you like.
I couldn't care less.
169
00:13:10,060 --> 00:13:11,969
I'm leaving. Understand?
170
00:13:12,716 --> 00:13:14,538
And this time for good.
171
00:13:17,388 --> 00:13:20,006
Out of my way. I couldn't
care less what becomes of you.
172
00:13:20,107 --> 00:13:21,035
Christoph!
173
00:13:21,132 --> 00:13:22,692
Leave me in peace!
174
00:13:22,987 --> 00:13:25,987
Christoph,
do what you like, anything.
175
00:13:26,092 --> 00:13:29,190
But don't leave me!
176
00:13:30,156 --> 00:13:31,618
Wait, Christoph!
177
00:13:33,164 --> 00:13:35,847
Let's talk it over!
Just one more time!
178
00:13:42,572 --> 00:13:44,328
- See you Friday?
- Okay.
179
00:14:05,644 --> 00:14:07,204
What do you want?
180
00:14:07,308 --> 00:14:08,714
Please don't go.
181
00:14:08,844 --> 00:14:11,211
Out of my way,
or I'll run you down!
182
00:14:12,555 --> 00:14:13,537
Beat it!
183
00:14:49,516 --> 00:14:51,818
Two coffees, two brandies,
please.
184
00:15:01,675 --> 00:15:03,050
What was that all about?
185
00:15:03,148 --> 00:15:07,621
Because I put on men's clothes
and went down to the river.
186
00:15:08,491 --> 00:15:09,866
To the River Main, and?
187
00:15:09,964 --> 00:15:14,753
I wanted to buy myself a boy.
Is that so terrible?
188
00:15:15,020 --> 00:15:19,111
It's not terrible at all, but...
189
00:15:21,227 --> 00:15:24,424
why did you wear men's clothes?
190
00:15:24,652 --> 00:15:27,652
I'm not so ashamed to pay for it
with men's clothes on
191
00:15:27,756 --> 00:15:30,276
as I am when I wear women's
clothes, as I have sometimes.
192
00:15:30,380 --> 00:15:33,347
Maybe it's stupid.
It's just a feeling I have.
193
00:15:33,451 --> 00:15:36,583
When I pay for it as a woman
I feel so terribly ashamed.
194
00:15:36,683 --> 00:15:39,105
- You understand?
- Sure, I understand.
195
00:15:39,467 --> 00:15:42,566
It wasn't the first time
I've done it in men's clothes,
196
00:15:42,668 --> 00:15:45,351
but last night they beat me up.
197
00:15:45,483 --> 00:15:48,298
Still, it's better
than those stupid grins.
198
00:15:48,396 --> 00:15:51,691
Last week I tried
to get a job in my old trade.
199
00:15:51,820 --> 00:15:54,187
- In men's clothes?
- Naturally.
200
00:15:54,315 --> 00:15:57,414
- What is your trade?
- I used to be a slaughterer.
201
00:15:57,516 --> 00:15:59,817
But hardly anyone knows that now.
202
00:16:00,524 --> 00:16:02,466
Slaughtering real animals?
203
00:16:02,572 --> 00:16:05,419
Yes, that's what I trained to do.
204
00:16:05,516 --> 00:16:08,101
But they just laughed
when I asked.
205
00:16:08,204 --> 00:16:12,066
They looked at my boobs,
made fun of me and kicked me out.
206
00:16:15,180 --> 00:16:18,693
Nobody realizes how important
it is for me to get a job again.
207
00:16:19,020 --> 00:16:21,737
Doing something
I was trained to do.
208
00:16:21,836 --> 00:16:24,324
But slaughtering animals.
209
00:16:24,812 --> 00:16:27,594
It's acting against life.
210
00:16:27,756 --> 00:16:30,342
No it's not. It's life itself:
211
00:16:30,443 --> 00:16:32,615
the steaming blood, and death.
212
00:16:32,715 --> 00:16:34,755
That's what gives
an animal's life meaning.
213
00:16:34,860 --> 00:16:38,089
And the smell when they know
they're going to die
214
00:16:38,188 --> 00:16:40,293
and know that it's beautiful,
and wait for it.
215
00:16:40,395 --> 00:16:42,151
Solitary and beautiful.
216
00:16:42,252 --> 00:16:45,547
When I was young
I felt the same disgust as you.
217
00:16:45,644 --> 00:16:47,237
Today I understand
the world better.
218
00:16:47,340 --> 00:16:48,900
Come on, I'll show you, Zora.
219
00:16:49,035 --> 00:16:52,101
You'll smell it, see them die,
hear their cries...
220
00:16:52,236 --> 00:16:54,024
cries for deliverance.
221
00:17:16,044 --> 00:17:20,419
I really wanted to be a goldsmith,
but couldn't get an apprenticeship.
222
00:17:20,556 --> 00:17:24,451
Only as a butcher. It was easier
to find a place in a butcher shop.
223
00:17:24,588 --> 00:17:28,865
In the end, I was satisfied. The
butcher had a daughter of my age.
224
00:17:29,228 --> 00:17:32,261
Her name was Irene. She finished
school as I finished my training.
225
00:17:32,364 --> 00:17:34,785
We wanted to live our own lives.
226
00:17:34,892 --> 00:17:37,925
Her dad treated us
like his property.
227
00:17:38,028 --> 00:17:42,468
We liked each other a lot.
You couldn't call it love, perhaps.
228
00:17:42,572 --> 00:17:46,630
But we felt something
for each other and got married.
229
00:17:46,732 --> 00:17:48,455
Soon after, Irene had the baby.
230
00:17:48,555 --> 00:17:49,984
Our little treasure, our Marie-Ann.
231
00:17:50,092 --> 00:17:51,914
Irene's dad couldn't
do anything then.
232
00:17:52,043 --> 00:17:55,905
Irene stuck by me, even after
I returned from Casablanca.
233
00:17:56,555 --> 00:17:59,785
She never asked for a divorce,
on account of the child
234
00:17:59,883 --> 00:18:03,462
although she's a lot smarter
than me. She became a teacher.
235
00:18:03,627 --> 00:18:06,410
And her life is
much more valuable than mine.
236
00:18:09,995 --> 00:18:12,646
Christoph was an actor
when I met him.
237
00:18:13,067 --> 00:18:14,725
Seven years he was
in the theater.
238
00:18:14,827 --> 00:18:19,300
Usually actors move on
to bigger and bigger cities.
239
00:18:19,404 --> 00:18:21,094
But with him it was the opposite.
240
00:18:21,195 --> 00:18:23,050
The towns became
smaller and smaller.
241
00:18:23,148 --> 00:18:26,759
In the end, nobody wanted him,
and that made him sad.
242
00:18:27,115 --> 00:18:29,482
He was so depressed he
wanted to die when I found him.
243
00:18:29,612 --> 00:18:32,295
I talked the hind leg
off a donkey to help him.
244
00:18:32,396 --> 00:18:35,047
The best thing
was rehearsing roles with him.
245
00:18:35,147 --> 00:18:38,464
I'd take one part and he the other.
I would say:
246
00:18:38,700 --> 00:18:41,634
And when our gaze lights
on a monstrous deed
247
00:18:41,740 --> 00:18:44,293
the soul stands still the while.
248
00:18:44,395 --> 00:18:46,184
And Christoph would say:
249
00:18:46,284 --> 00:18:48,934
So in the end,
I face my banishment
250
00:18:49,387 --> 00:18:53,064
disowned, exiled
and but a beggar here.
251
00:18:56,044 --> 00:18:58,182
With laurel they have crowned me
252
00:18:58,316 --> 00:19:01,698
to lead me to an altar,
like a sacrificial beast.
253
00:19:02,027 --> 00:19:05,289
So, on the final day,
they lured from me
254
00:19:05,388 --> 00:19:09,250
my poem, which was
my sole possession
255
00:19:09,388 --> 00:19:12,704
gained it with flattery
and held it fast.
256
00:19:12,812 --> 00:19:17,449
Now my only wealth
is in your hands
257
00:19:17,676 --> 00:19:20,742
which was my commendation
to the world:
258
00:19:21,035 --> 00:19:24,810
all that remained
to save me from starvation.
259
00:19:25,163 --> 00:19:29,506
Now I perceive
why I should celebrate:
260
00:19:29,771 --> 00:19:33,732
that I may not
perfect the song I write,
261
00:19:34,092 --> 00:19:37,387
and that my name
should not be spread abroad
262
00:19:37,643 --> 00:19:40,807
that in their envy,
my detractors find
263
00:19:40,908 --> 00:19:44,224
a thousand faults,
and I should be forgotten.
264
00:19:44,331 --> 00:19:47,648
Hence I should yield
myself to idleness
265
00:19:47,884 --> 00:19:50,371
sparing myself
and all my senses, too.
266
00:19:52,395 --> 00:19:55,657
How willingly
we do deceive ourselves
267
00:19:55,756 --> 00:19:58,822
and honor
the corrupt who honor us.
268
00:19:59,115 --> 00:20:02,431
Then I'd say, I'll not abandon you
in your distress.
269
00:20:02,700 --> 00:20:04,456
And Christoph:
Grant...
270
00:20:04,779 --> 00:20:06,535
O grant me
271
00:20:06,636 --> 00:20:10,378
for a moment
the present back again!
272
00:20:11,276 --> 00:20:15,880
And though a man be silenced
by his pain
273
00:20:16,651 --> 00:20:18,920
A God gave me the power to say
274
00:20:19,308 --> 00:20:22,624
how much I suffer.
275
00:20:29,004 --> 00:20:32,648
I took great pains,
but in the end
276
00:20:32,779 --> 00:20:35,594
he had to admit he didn't
have what it takes.
277
00:20:35,980 --> 00:20:37,092
At least
278
00:20:37,227 --> 00:20:40,576
I helped him retain
his chance of survival.
279
00:20:41,003 --> 00:20:45,159
At first, he was as if paralyzed.
280
00:20:45,451 --> 00:20:48,550
It went on for years,
this grieving apathy
281
00:20:48,651 --> 00:20:51,651
before he
finally made up his mind
282
00:20:51,756 --> 00:20:54,723
to be the way
he'd learned a man should be:
283
00:20:54,828 --> 00:20:57,194
active, decisive,
284
00:20:57,291 --> 00:21:00,161
independent, apparently.
285
00:21:00,267 --> 00:21:04,261
All that time he lived off me,
and he wasn't ashamed of it.
286
00:21:04,684 --> 00:21:06,691
That was important for me.
287
00:21:06,827 --> 00:21:08,234
Believe me, Zora.
288
00:21:08,332 --> 00:21:11,398
He wasn't the type to be a pimp
289
00:21:11,500 --> 00:21:13,572
even though
our money came from other men
290
00:21:13,676 --> 00:21:15,563
with whom I slept.
291
00:21:15,660 --> 00:21:18,027
At first
he used to ask me about them.
292
00:21:18,155 --> 00:21:20,195
How they were, what they said...
293
00:21:20,300 --> 00:21:22,405
whether they were tender
and loving
294
00:21:22,603 --> 00:21:24,458
whether they had special wishes
295
00:21:24,555 --> 00:21:27,871
what their bodies were like,
especially their dicks.
296
00:21:28,363 --> 00:21:31,680
Whether they were big,
bigger than his.
297
00:21:31,820 --> 00:21:34,209
That was strangely important.
298
00:21:34,315 --> 00:21:38,919
As if the size of a cock
were a problem for him.
299
00:21:39,052 --> 00:21:41,954
But as time went by,
his interest in this faded.
300
00:21:42,091 --> 00:21:45,735
He found a new interest
of a fundamental kind:
301
00:21:46,220 --> 00:21:49,536
How to earn a living as a man.
302
00:21:49,995 --> 00:21:54,436
Finally he decided
to go into investment consulting,
303
00:21:54,956 --> 00:21:57,443
a kind of poor man's stockbroker
304
00:21:57,547 --> 00:22:00,329
selling shares
in car washes and so on.
305
00:22:00,427 --> 00:22:04,005
He changed his job a lot.
Nothing was very reputable
306
00:22:04,204 --> 00:22:07,138
but he earned enough money
307
00:22:07,275 --> 00:22:09,348
for me not
to have to work the game.
308
00:22:09,483 --> 00:22:11,720
He wanted to provide for me.
309
00:22:11,819 --> 00:22:13,248
I just gave him a start.
310
00:22:13,387 --> 00:22:15,492
I bought the apartment
and furnished it.
311
00:22:15,595 --> 00:22:18,890
But I've been
living off him the past few years.
312
00:22:19,020 --> 00:22:20,711
He wants to make me
happy that way.
313
00:22:20,811 --> 00:22:22,022
I know he does.
314
00:22:24,299 --> 00:22:25,576
Christoph.
315
00:25:11,595 --> 00:25:13,417
Elvira! Can't you hear?
316
00:25:15,275 --> 00:25:17,315
Why don't you open the door?
317
00:26:15,595 --> 00:26:17,286
- Christoph?
- It's me.
318
00:26:17,515 --> 00:26:18,627
Irene.
319
00:26:19,211 --> 00:26:22,081
I've been ringing like mad,
but you didn't open.
320
00:26:22,187 --> 00:26:24,162
- Have you been taking pills again?
- Not at all.
321
00:26:24,267 --> 00:26:26,023
I have such a headache.
322
00:26:26,155 --> 00:26:28,522
- Too much to drink?
- Hardly anything.
323
00:26:30,123 --> 00:26:31,552
Now I remember.
324
00:26:32,427 --> 00:26:35,012
This morning... Christoph.
325
00:26:35,435 --> 00:26:37,574
He packed all his things
and left.
326
00:26:37,675 --> 00:26:39,268
For good, he said.
327
00:26:41,035 --> 00:26:42,628
Don't worry, dear.
328
00:26:42,955 --> 00:26:44,865
His books are still here.
329
00:26:44,971 --> 00:26:46,345
That's right.
330
00:26:46,827 --> 00:26:50,143
It's always the same prattle.
Backwards and forwards.
331
00:26:50,635 --> 00:26:53,603
And I fall for it every time.
I get all upset
332
00:26:53,707 --> 00:26:56,577
and he just laughs up his sleeve.
333
00:26:57,291 --> 00:26:59,200
Aren't you teaching today?
334
00:26:59,627 --> 00:27:01,034
School's over.
335
00:27:01,515 --> 00:27:02,725
It's afternoon now.
336
00:27:02,827 --> 00:27:04,769
- Really?
- Yes.
337
00:27:07,147 --> 00:27:09,481
What did you fight
about this time?
338
00:27:09,803 --> 00:27:11,591
About. Oh, you know...
339
00:27:14,475 --> 00:27:16,068
It's always the same.
340
00:27:16,171 --> 00:27:17,959
Nothing at all, really.
341
00:27:20,875 --> 00:27:22,020
Really?
342
00:27:23,051 --> 00:27:24,774
Don't you believe me?
343
00:27:24,875 --> 00:27:26,282
Shouldn't I believe you?
344
00:27:26,379 --> 00:27:28,004
- Why shouldn't you?
- Why do you think?
345
00:27:28,139 --> 00:27:30,245
I don't understand you, Irene.
346
00:27:30,571 --> 00:27:31,716
- No?
- No.
347
00:27:33,323 --> 00:27:35,462
And why didn't you tell me...
348
00:27:35,691 --> 00:27:39,171
about this interview you gave?
- Why are you yelling at me?
349
00:27:41,035 --> 00:27:43,271
Don't always change the subject.
350
00:27:44,107 --> 00:27:45,895
I asked you a question.
351
00:27:46,923 --> 00:27:49,258
- Why did...
- Is the interview in the paper?
352
00:27:49,355 --> 00:27:50,500
Show me.
353
00:27:51,275 --> 00:27:53,283
Wonderful.
Have you seen the picture?
354
00:27:53,387 --> 00:27:55,689
A real photo of me
in a real newspaper.
355
00:27:55,787 --> 00:27:58,983
Why didn't you tell me
about the interview, you idiot?
356
00:27:59,083 --> 00:28:00,261
Why are you screaming at me?
357
00:28:00,395 --> 00:28:02,304
I'm screaming
because you're crazy
358
00:28:02,443 --> 00:28:04,451
and have nothing in your head
359
00:28:04,587 --> 00:28:06,594
but painting your face.
360
00:28:07,947 --> 00:28:09,955
All people ever do
is scream at me
361
00:28:10,059 --> 00:28:11,946
and try to hurt me.
362
00:28:12,299 --> 00:28:15,616
Erwin,
have you read what you said?
363
00:28:16,331 --> 00:28:18,339
- About Anton?
- About Anton!
364
00:28:18,666 --> 00:28:21,983
Why should I read it?
I know what I know about him.
365
00:28:22,123 --> 00:28:24,425
And it's the truth,
so why shouldn't I say
366
00:28:24,523 --> 00:28:26,050
it's the truth?
367
00:28:26,155 --> 00:28:31,108
You can't tell people everything,
even if it is the truth.
368
00:28:31,211 --> 00:28:32,323
But...
369
00:28:37,035 --> 00:28:38,595
Do you realize
370
00:28:39,371 --> 00:28:42,153
how powerful Anton Saitz is now?
371
00:28:42,987 --> 00:28:44,580
Have you any idea?
372
00:28:45,739 --> 00:28:47,627
Are you really aware
373
00:28:48,235 --> 00:28:51,366
of what you said about a man
who has so much power?
374
00:28:52,779 --> 00:28:54,721
Do you know what he'll do?
375
00:28:55,979 --> 00:28:58,467
He'll crush you
376
00:28:59,275 --> 00:29:00,704
like an insect.
377
00:29:01,707 --> 00:29:04,096
- Swat you like an annoying little fly.
- Nonsense, Irene!
378
00:29:04,235 --> 00:29:06,308
It's not nonsense, Elvira.
379
00:29:09,387 --> 00:29:12,071
That man's interfered
enough in your life.
380
00:29:14,027 --> 00:29:16,613
He's destroyed whatever he could.
381
00:29:16,939 --> 00:29:19,590
- What do you mean?
- What do I mean!
382
00:29:21,163 --> 00:29:24,392
First, that jail term, and then
383
00:29:24,875 --> 00:29:26,762
that trip to Casablanca.
384
00:29:27,019 --> 00:29:28,775
That wasn't his fault.
385
00:29:30,922 --> 00:29:33,344
Like hell it wasn't!
386
00:29:34,123 --> 00:29:35,170
Okay...
387
00:29:36,203 --> 00:29:38,308
but he'd never do me any harm.
388
00:29:38,475 --> 00:29:39,555
Never.
389
00:29:42,763 --> 00:29:43,973
All right.
390
00:29:45,931 --> 00:29:49,793
Maybe he'll leave you in peace
391
00:29:51,979 --> 00:29:55,296
but he'll find some way
to take his revenge.
392
00:29:56,907 --> 00:29:58,183
He has to.
393
00:30:05,195 --> 00:30:07,202
And if he decides
to take his revenge
394
00:30:07,307 --> 00:30:12,096
by destroying your...
our daughter?
395
00:30:12,875 --> 00:30:14,151
Marie-Ann?
396
00:30:17,610 --> 00:30:20,360
What does it have to do with her?
397
00:30:21,259 --> 00:30:23,560
The man's not wicked, believe me.
398
00:30:29,707 --> 00:30:31,846
Our child has suffered enough.
399
00:30:32,779 --> 00:30:36,357
- She has a right to her own life.
- It's all right, darling.
400
00:30:38,219 --> 00:30:39,496
Don't cry.
401
00:30:40,394 --> 00:30:41,605
Don't cry.
402
00:30:42,955 --> 00:30:44,515
I'm scared, Erwin.
403
00:30:46,123 --> 00:30:48,905
All day I was afraid
for our girl.
404
00:30:50,507 --> 00:30:52,329
And now this interview.
405
00:30:53,099 --> 00:30:57,409
I'm so terribly scared.
406
00:30:57,515 --> 00:30:59,076
You're trembling...
407
00:30:59,883 --> 00:31:02,120
trembling as if you had a fever.
408
00:31:02,603 --> 00:31:03,551
Are you sick?
409
00:31:03,659 --> 00:31:05,546
I'm not sick, Erwin.
410
00:31:05,643 --> 00:31:07,399
I'm just scared.
411
00:31:08,523 --> 00:31:09,570
Okay
412
00:31:10,923 --> 00:31:12,745
I'll see what I can do.
413
00:31:13,386 --> 00:31:16,615
I'll go to him
and ask him to forgive me.
414
00:31:16,715 --> 00:31:17,828
Feel better now?
415
00:31:18,891 --> 00:31:20,233
Much better.
416
00:31:22,219 --> 00:31:24,194
Only if you really do it
417
00:31:27,051 --> 00:31:28,742
and only if it helps.
418
00:32:43,434 --> 00:32:44,896
- You want something?
- I, er...
419
00:32:45,002 --> 00:32:48,418
Keep staring at me and
I'll carve you into little pieces.
420
00:32:50,795 --> 00:32:52,682
Beat it, you stupid cow!
421
00:35:10,283 --> 00:35:13,381
Baby dear, what are you doing?
You should be in bed.
422
00:35:13,483 --> 00:35:14,945
Irene woke me up.
423
00:35:15,051 --> 00:35:16,513
Did he turn up?
424
00:35:17,290 --> 00:35:18,567
Don't cry.
425
00:35:18,827 --> 00:35:20,004
I'm not.
426
00:35:20,106 --> 00:35:21,480
What's the matter, then?
427
00:35:21,578 --> 00:35:25,801
I sat down here,
and it just came over me.
428
00:35:27,754 --> 00:35:30,176
Don't worry. You know what I do
when I'm feeling down?
429
00:35:30,314 --> 00:35:31,558
I go to Soul Frieda.
430
00:35:31,690 --> 00:35:34,079
- Who's that?
- Come on. I'll show you.
431
00:35:43,818 --> 00:35:44,866
Do you like him?
432
00:35:44,970 --> 00:35:47,905
That's one of the guys
who beat me up last night.
433
00:35:48,010 --> 00:35:49,603
I like him anyway.
434
00:36:23,178 --> 00:36:26,953
Once I dreamed
I was walking in a cemetery
435
00:36:27,274 --> 00:36:30,176
and suddenly I noticed
something strange.
436
00:36:30,442 --> 00:36:33,758
The inscriptions on the graves
were not like those I knew.
437
00:36:33,867 --> 00:36:36,965
Usually you see
"Born 1918, died 1968"
438
00:36:37,099 --> 00:36:40,415
or "Born 1927, died 1975"
439
00:36:40,746 --> 00:36:47,620
But the dates on these graves read:
1970-72, or 1965-66, or 1954-57.
440
00:36:47,882 --> 00:36:52,006
No one here seemed to have been
older than a couple of years.
441
00:36:52,426 --> 00:36:55,874
Some were even younger.
Some were just a few days old:
442
00:36:55,978 --> 00:36:59,394
"February 18 to March 11",
or "May 19 to June 5",
443
00:36:59,498 --> 00:37:01,538
others only a few hours.
444
00:37:02,122 --> 00:37:06,944
While I'm trying to figure out
why this cemetery is so strange
445
00:37:08,106 --> 00:37:10,921
I suddenly see a very
old man in front of me.
446
00:37:12,490 --> 00:37:13,865
He's the gardener.
447
00:37:13,962 --> 00:37:17,126
I ask him, how he became so old
448
00:37:17,226 --> 00:37:21,382
when everyone else there
died so young.
449
00:37:21,707 --> 00:37:24,041
He laughs,
shakes his head and says
450
00:37:24,395 --> 00:37:25,955
"No. You're mistaken."
451
00:37:26,059 --> 00:37:30,598
"The dates are not
the duration of people's lives"
452
00:37:30,763 --> 00:37:34,079
"But the time they had
a true friend."
453
00:37:38,539 --> 00:37:40,065
What a sad dream.
454
00:37:41,515 --> 00:37:43,041
A very sad dream.
455
00:37:44,874 --> 00:37:47,176
Yes, Zora, it's a very sad dream.
456
00:37:47,850 --> 00:37:50,370
Maybe I didn't dream
it after all.
457
00:37:50,474 --> 00:37:52,962
Maybe I heard it
or read it somewhere.
458
00:37:53,610 --> 00:37:54,690
What does it matter?
459
00:37:54,794 --> 00:37:57,129
- What's the weather like outside?
- I beg your pardon.
460
00:37:57,227 --> 00:37:59,266
What's the weather like?
461
00:38:00,875 --> 00:38:03,176
Is it raining
or is it not raining?
462
00:38:03,274 --> 00:38:06,089
Is the sun shining
or is the sun not shining?
463
00:38:06,314 --> 00:38:08,256
I haven't been outside in months.
464
00:38:08,395 --> 00:38:10,850
But believe me, you know nothing.
465
00:38:12,106 --> 00:38:13,895
No one falls for the fairy tale
466
00:38:13,994 --> 00:38:16,896
that there's a "real life"
in a "real world"
467
00:38:17,035 --> 00:38:20,351
and that "real life"
is more important than loving.
468
00:38:21,162 --> 00:38:24,479
What does it matter? I know
we don't really have a chance
469
00:38:24,682 --> 00:38:28,708
whatever might have become of us
if we'd had the chance.
470
00:38:30,410 --> 00:38:33,727
- Oh, won't you sit down?
- Why, I...?
471
00:38:34,026 --> 00:38:38,815
You look so lost and unhappy
standing there like that.
472
00:38:41,099 --> 00:38:43,106
Maybe she really is unhappy.
473
00:38:43,850 --> 00:38:45,257
Maybe she is.
474
00:38:45,739 --> 00:38:47,146
Maybe she is unhappy.
475
00:38:53,610 --> 00:38:55,137
She's very lonely.
476
00:38:55,243 --> 00:38:58,177
Everybody's lonely.
That's how it should be.
477
00:38:58,282 --> 00:39:00,354
If you're sad,
you have no time to think.
478
00:39:00,458 --> 00:39:03,622
Elvira was a
very beautiful woman
479
00:39:03,723 --> 00:39:05,697
after she had her operation.
480
00:39:05,803 --> 00:39:07,297
- Cancer?
- No.
481
00:39:07,819 --> 00:39:09,280
Not an illness.
482
00:39:09,802 --> 00:39:13,031
She just had
everything cut off down there.
483
00:39:13,162 --> 00:39:15,879
That can't be
the reason she's unhappy.
484
00:39:16,490 --> 00:39:19,458
She was probably always a woman
deep down inside.
485
00:39:20,586 --> 00:39:21,863
No, she wasn't.
486
00:39:21,963 --> 00:39:24,483
That's the trouble.
She just did it
487
00:39:25,034 --> 00:39:27,522
without any real reason
488
00:39:28,906 --> 00:39:31,240
without any psychological motives.
489
00:39:31,594 --> 00:39:34,016
I don't think she was even gay.
490
00:39:36,074 --> 00:39:37,732
Am I right, baby?
491
00:39:38,922 --> 00:39:43,046
You weren't gay
when you went to Casablanca?
492
00:39:43,146 --> 00:39:47,040
No, that's why
it was so terrible at first.
493
00:39:47,787 --> 00:39:49,674
I had to exist.
494
00:39:50,474 --> 00:39:52,546
When men felt me up
in the bars
495
00:39:52,650 --> 00:39:57,571
where I was a hostess.
what else could I have done?
496
00:39:57,834 --> 00:40:00,355
I was alive,
and I had to go on living.
497
00:40:00,810 --> 00:40:03,396
I felt ashamed
with every one of them.
498
00:40:04,138 --> 00:40:07,138
And the trouble is, when they
notice you're ashamed
499
00:40:07,243 --> 00:40:09,315
they do it all the more
500
00:40:10,026 --> 00:40:12,709
touching you up and so forth.
501
00:40:13,099 --> 00:40:15,073
I like it when men feel me up.
502
00:40:15,179 --> 00:40:17,480
They're so awkward when
they try to be tender
503
00:40:17,578 --> 00:40:19,585
that it's kind of nice, too.
504
00:40:20,490 --> 00:40:22,399
Anyway all men are lovely.
505
00:40:23,051 --> 00:40:24,741
Him and him and him.
506
00:40:26,570 --> 00:40:28,904
And especially
if they have a dick
507
00:40:29,002 --> 00:40:31,424
that hasn't shrivelled up.
508
00:40:32,459 --> 00:40:35,775
More and more men can't
get it up anymore.
509
00:40:37,450 --> 00:40:39,239
It's like an epidemic.
510
00:40:42,378 --> 00:40:44,866
- Would you like a drink?
- Yes, please.
511
00:40:48,106 --> 00:40:52,547
It took quite a few years,
and it cost me a great effort.
512
00:40:52,746 --> 00:40:54,023
But I managed it
513
00:40:54,122 --> 00:40:55,846
even if it was hard.
514
00:40:56,394 --> 00:41:00,289
I had to learn how men smell,
and not to think that they stank
515
00:41:00,395 --> 00:41:02,217
and be nauseated by it.
516
00:41:02,794 --> 00:41:05,958
What, in expressive terms,
I regard as my body
517
00:41:06,059 --> 00:41:09,604
if I can be aware of it in
another form, is in fact my will.
518
00:41:09,866 --> 00:41:12,616
Or, my body is
the objectivization of my will.
519
00:41:12,714 --> 00:41:15,649
Or, apart from it being
a concept of my imagination
520
00:41:15,755 --> 00:41:17,664
my body is merely my will.
521
00:41:17,866 --> 00:41:20,452
One day I woke up
with pains in my back.
522
00:41:21,354 --> 00:41:23,427
I didn't worry about them
523
00:41:23,722 --> 00:41:25,610
and the pains went away.
524
00:41:26,026 --> 00:41:28,644
But they came back again,
worse than before
525
00:41:28,746 --> 00:41:30,917
and were even worse
the next time.
526
00:41:31,019 --> 00:41:35,241
One day
I woke up and couldn't move.
527
00:41:35,882 --> 00:41:37,638
I lay there paralyzed.
528
00:41:37,898 --> 00:41:39,872
They said it was rheumatism
529
00:41:39,978 --> 00:41:42,182
said they could
do nothing about it
530
00:41:42,283 --> 00:41:44,071
because it was all psychosomatic.
531
00:41:44,170 --> 00:41:45,348
Maybe...
532
00:41:45,866 --> 00:41:47,273
That was all.
533
00:41:49,898 --> 00:41:53,543
Just now you were
talking about having a chance.
534
00:41:56,939 --> 00:41:59,208
If a person is paralyzed
535
00:41:59,850 --> 00:42:01,377
suddenly, overnight
536
00:42:01,483 --> 00:42:03,490
and not alone that
537
00:42:05,130 --> 00:42:07,999
you can't just
leave him lying there alone
538
00:42:08,682 --> 00:42:10,821
before he's stopped breathing.
539
00:42:11,242 --> 00:42:14,209
On the contrary, it's quite normal
for people to stop breathing
540
00:42:14,314 --> 00:42:16,202
without anyone noticing.
541
00:42:16,298 --> 00:42:19,265
And hardly anyone gets
the kind of chance I mean.
542
00:42:19,371 --> 00:42:22,021
Take me.
I spent eight years in a loony bin.
543
00:42:22,122 --> 00:42:23,780
Eight years, ma'am
544
00:42:23,882 --> 00:42:26,664
as a madman among madmen.
545
00:42:30,314 --> 00:42:31,623
And what happened?
546
00:42:31,722 --> 00:42:33,478
They straightened me out
547
00:42:33,578 --> 00:42:36,993
so that I don't behave so oddly
and frighten little kids.
548
00:42:37,226 --> 00:42:40,325
But the one thing
that might have helped...
549
00:42:40,618 --> 00:42:41,731
Forget it.
550
00:42:41,834 --> 00:42:42,979
Nothing doing.
551
00:42:43,082 --> 00:42:46,791
"Sorry, we can't recommend
psychoanalysis in your case...
552
00:42:47,306 --> 00:42:50,623
"because you're an orphan,
Mr. Miller."
553
00:42:59,722 --> 00:43:01,664
- Are you okay?
- Yes.
554
00:43:16,938 --> 00:43:21,673
But my greatest fear is that,
one day, I'll find words...
555
00:43:21,770 --> 00:43:26,560
to express my feelings.
For when I do...
556
00:43:40,714 --> 00:43:42,056
Is that her?
557
00:43:45,930 --> 00:43:47,337
I don't know.
558
00:43:48,394 --> 00:43:50,085
Can't you remember anything?
559
00:43:50,186 --> 00:43:52,128
Let's go, Zora. I'm afraid.
560
00:43:52,234 --> 00:43:53,379
Afraid?
561
00:43:53,930 --> 00:43:55,556
- Of what?
- Of...
562
00:43:56,138 --> 00:43:57,152
That's just it.
563
00:43:57,258 --> 00:43:59,843
I can't find words
that make sense.
564
00:43:59,946 --> 00:44:03,656
It's as if my head
were full of clogged-up pipes.
565
00:44:04,138 --> 00:44:07,334
Let's go, Zora.
Let's get out of here.
566
00:44:09,802 --> 00:44:10,849
Baby...
567
00:44:11,498 --> 00:44:13,320
we came here specially.
568
00:44:13,898 --> 00:44:17,313
It was your idea. You wanted
to find out about your past.
569
00:44:18,538 --> 00:44:20,000
Be sensible...
570
00:44:20,138 --> 00:44:23,105
and have a tiny little bit of faith
in yourself.
571
00:44:24,682 --> 00:44:26,143
We all have to.
572
00:44:26,538 --> 00:44:27,618
Maybe.
573
00:44:31,722 --> 00:44:33,413
Not maybe. For sure.
574
00:44:35,178 --> 00:44:38,342
Just look at the walls
you were behind for 14 years.
575
00:44:41,610 --> 00:44:42,886
It's a...
576
00:44:43,114 --> 00:44:45,536
building
with very thick walls, isn't it?
577
00:44:46,218 --> 00:44:47,941
The nun over there...
578
00:44:52,265 --> 00:44:53,575
Be careful!
579
00:44:54,570 --> 00:44:55,912
Is that her?
580
00:44:56,810 --> 00:44:57,955
Could be...
581
00:44:58,058 --> 00:44:59,432
I'm not sure.
582
00:45:00,106 --> 00:45:01,829
Then I'll go ask her.
583
00:45:07,210 --> 00:45:08,487
Excuse me.
584
00:45:08,970 --> 00:45:10,432
Are you Sister Gudrun?
585
00:45:10,570 --> 00:45:12,392
Yes, I'm Sister Gudrun.
586
00:45:13,642 --> 00:45:15,103
Can I help you?
587
00:45:15,210 --> 00:45:16,803
No, not me.
588
00:45:18,122 --> 00:45:21,635
But there's somebody outside
589
00:45:22,506 --> 00:45:23,935
that you once knew.
590
00:45:24,905 --> 00:45:27,207
He could do with some help maybe.
591
00:45:27,946 --> 00:45:29,091
Please.
592
00:45:35,498 --> 00:45:36,775
Elvira...
593
00:45:37,962 --> 00:45:39,685
this is Sister Gudrun.
594
00:45:41,962 --> 00:45:43,685
Hello, Sister Gudrun.
595
00:45:46,762 --> 00:45:47,874
I'm...
596
00:45:48,905 --> 00:45:50,629
I'm Erwin Weisshaupt.
597
00:45:51,466 --> 00:45:53,768
Do you... remember me?
598
00:45:54,794 --> 00:45:56,834
Erwin Weisshaupt?
599
00:45:58,634 --> 00:46:01,700
I remember
a boy by that name, yes.
600
00:46:03,530 --> 00:46:05,570
I've ruined my life, Sister.
601
00:46:06,826 --> 00:46:08,168
My own life.
602
00:46:08,458 --> 00:46:11,011
Nobody ruins his own life.
603
00:46:11,818 --> 00:46:14,687
It's the order man creates
for himself that's his downfall.
604
00:46:14,825 --> 00:46:16,003
And God?
605
00:46:16,458 --> 00:46:18,345
God can't be that cruel.
606
00:46:19,306 --> 00:46:21,193
Rather He doesn't exist.
607
00:46:24,778 --> 00:46:26,153
Little Erwin.
608
00:46:27,530 --> 00:46:28,991
I remember you.
609
00:46:29,418 --> 00:46:31,328
I remember you very well.
610
00:46:32,138 --> 00:46:34,178
I tried to give you my love.
611
00:46:38,090 --> 00:46:39,551
You're unhappy?
612
00:46:39,658 --> 00:46:40,640
Yes.
613
00:46:41,546 --> 00:46:44,034
Elvira came
to ask about her childhood.
614
00:46:44,746 --> 00:46:47,779
She has no memories of it
and misses them.
615
00:46:48,073 --> 00:46:50,856
Do you really believe
you need to remember it?
616
00:46:50,953 --> 00:46:52,644
You really think so?
617
00:46:54,346 --> 00:46:55,622
Yes, I do.
618
00:46:57,002 --> 00:46:58,725
Maybe you're right.
619
00:47:08,618 --> 00:47:10,723
Sometime during the last war
620
00:47:10,986 --> 00:47:15,426
Anita Weisshaupt
secretly gave birth to a son.
621
00:47:15,978 --> 00:47:19,906
Shortly afterwards, she brought
her baby here to the orphanage
622
00:47:20,009 --> 00:47:21,897
and gave it for adoption.
623
00:47:23,786 --> 00:47:25,728
The child was christened Erwin
624
00:47:25,834 --> 00:47:27,841
and all the sisters loved him.
625
00:47:27,946 --> 00:47:29,702
He was a quiet child
626
00:47:29,802 --> 00:47:33,348
which they found agreeable,
so they said he was a good boy.
627
00:47:33,834 --> 00:47:36,933
Even in the worst days
after the war
628
00:47:37,033 --> 00:47:39,750
they made sure that the child
always had enough to eat.
629
00:47:39,850 --> 00:47:42,087
Rather too much than too little.
630
00:47:42,185 --> 00:47:44,804
In return, the sisters
expected him to love them.
631
00:47:44,938 --> 00:47:47,491
Each one individually
and each one most.
632
00:47:48,970 --> 00:47:52,003
The child was, therefore,
forced to learn to lie...
633
00:47:52,106 --> 00:47:56,000
for he soon found out that,
the more he told the nuns
634
00:47:56,394 --> 00:48:00,387
what they wanted to hear,
the better he was treated.
635
00:48:01,578 --> 00:48:05,408
He mastered this system
of rewarded lies so well
636
00:48:05,674 --> 00:48:09,668
that no one noticed how the
quiet child turned into a sad one.
637
00:48:10,858 --> 00:48:12,549
Erwin was a gifted
pupil at school.
638
00:48:12,650 --> 00:48:16,807
Learning was no great effort
for him.
639
00:48:17,450 --> 00:48:19,272
But after 18 months
640
00:48:19,658 --> 00:48:21,665
many things changed for him.
641
00:48:23,242 --> 00:48:25,446
A couple who wanted
642
00:48:25,641 --> 00:48:28,958
to adopt a child grew
attached to him.
643
00:48:29,546 --> 00:48:31,880
They invited him to their home
644
00:48:32,074 --> 00:48:33,961
and occupied themselves with him.
645
00:48:34,058 --> 00:48:36,447
It was like
heaven on earth for him.
646
00:48:37,802 --> 00:48:40,584
Then, after long deliberation
647
00:48:40,682 --> 00:48:42,569
they applied to adopt Erwin.
648
00:48:42,665 --> 00:48:45,982
They showed trust
and patience for him
649
00:48:46,090 --> 00:48:48,479
and love as well.
650
00:48:49,130 --> 00:48:51,137
He was as quiet as ever.
651
00:48:51,274 --> 00:48:54,918
But inwardly he was overjoyed.
652
00:48:55,018 --> 00:48:59,807
There were no words
to describe this feeling,
653
00:49:00,201 --> 00:49:01,695
the trembling of a soul
654
00:49:01,802 --> 00:49:04,671
about to fulfill a sacred yearning.
655
00:49:04,905 --> 00:49:09,062
As a matter of form, his mother
was asked to confirm her decision
656
00:49:09,449 --> 00:49:11,904
to release Erwin for adoption.
657
00:49:12,618 --> 00:49:15,934
I went to see Anita Weisshaupt.
658
00:49:16,362 --> 00:49:19,297
The moment she opened the door
659
00:49:19,401 --> 00:49:22,914
I saw a strange fear in her eyes.
660
00:49:23,401 --> 00:49:25,224
And when I spoke of Erwin
661
00:49:25,321 --> 00:49:27,656
her expression of fear intensified.
662
00:49:27,754 --> 00:49:31,747
I realized she had managed
663
00:49:31,978 --> 00:49:33,866
to forget her own child.
664
00:49:34,218 --> 00:49:36,738
And I knew how terrible
that must have been for her.
665
00:49:38,794 --> 00:49:41,958
She drew me into a room
and shut the door behind us.
666
00:49:43,498 --> 00:49:45,832
The apartment rang
with the cries of children.
667
00:49:45,929 --> 00:49:48,515
Her husband
had returned from captivity
668
00:49:49,065 --> 00:49:51,967
though she had heard nothing
from him in years.
669
00:49:52,393 --> 00:49:55,459
In the meantime, she had had
three more children by him.
670
00:49:55,594 --> 00:49:57,416
But still he treated her badly
671
00:49:57,514 --> 00:49:59,204
and she lived in fear of him.
672
00:49:59,306 --> 00:50:03,135
She was trembling and pale
673
00:50:03,242 --> 00:50:05,097
and a terrible thought
occurred to me.
674
00:50:05,194 --> 00:50:07,233
Had she been married
to this man
675
00:50:07,338 --> 00:50:09,313
when she gave birth to Erwin?
676
00:50:09,418 --> 00:50:12,866
When I asked her, the look of
terror in her eyes was so great
677
00:50:12,969 --> 00:50:15,173
I thought her head would burst.
678
00:50:15,530 --> 00:50:19,938
She clutched at her heart
as she nodded "yes"
679
00:50:20,585 --> 00:50:24,579
sensing rather than knowing
the true import of her answer
680
00:50:25,258 --> 00:50:27,647
and the fundamental nature
681
00:50:27,786 --> 00:50:31,331
of the lie she had been living.
682
00:50:31,882 --> 00:50:33,475
It meant that Erwin
683
00:50:33,577 --> 00:50:35,999
whoever his father may have been
684
00:50:36,105 --> 00:50:40,099
had been born in wedlock
and was a legitimate child
685
00:50:40,745 --> 00:50:46,823
who could not be adopted
without the husband's consent.
686
00:50:49,738 --> 00:50:52,455
Anita took a deep breath
687
00:50:52,554 --> 00:50:57,856
closed her eyes, shook her head
688
00:50:58,793 --> 00:51:03,615
and said in a voice
so painfully clear and final
689
00:51:03,753 --> 00:51:05,412
that my heart sank.
690
00:51:05,738 --> 00:51:08,640
No, she would not allow
the child to be adopted
691
00:51:08,745 --> 00:51:12,575
since she did not want her husband
ever to know of its existence.
692
00:51:13,193 --> 00:51:15,811
She actually used the words
693
00:51:15,946 --> 00:51:18,084
"that child" and "my husband".
694
00:51:18,857 --> 00:51:21,192
There was nothing more
one could do to help her.
695
00:51:22,281 --> 00:51:26,504
From then on, the young couple
stopped coming to see Erwin
696
00:51:27,210 --> 00:51:30,057
and he was never invited
to their home again.
697
00:51:31,498 --> 00:51:35,272
He waited for weeks
without ever asking why
698
00:51:35,625 --> 00:51:38,309
probably fearing
what the answer might be.
699
00:51:38,665 --> 00:51:40,771
His yearning was so great
700
00:51:41,481 --> 00:51:46,053
that hope lingered
longer than reason would allow.
701
00:51:47,114 --> 00:51:50,496
So long, in fact, that it began
to smoulder in his head.
702
00:51:52,330 --> 00:51:55,559
Erwin was seized by a fever
703
00:51:55,658 --> 00:51:57,512
that no doctor could cure.
704
00:51:57,609 --> 00:52:01,155
They said the child would die
unless some miracle occurred.
705
00:52:02,282 --> 00:52:05,543
Whatever it was,
the miracle came about.
706
00:52:05,674 --> 00:52:09,449
The fever vanished, as it had
appeared, without apparent reason.
707
00:52:10,089 --> 00:52:14,345
But the consuming fire
continued to burn within him.
708
00:52:15,081 --> 00:52:16,870
Erwin became a different person.
709
00:52:16,969 --> 00:52:19,141
Nothing interested him anymore.
710
00:52:20,393 --> 00:52:22,281
His whole being changed.
711
00:52:22,729 --> 00:52:24,704
He began to steal things
712
00:52:25,130 --> 00:52:30,826
things he could have had anyway.
713
00:52:31,434 --> 00:52:33,343
And he became unaccountable
714
00:52:33,450 --> 00:52:35,784
no longer predictable
for the nuns.
715
00:52:36,426 --> 00:52:39,328
And in the same unthinking way
716
00:52:39,466 --> 00:52:43,175
as they had thought they loved him,
they now began to fear the child.
717
00:52:43,273 --> 00:52:45,215
In the end, they hated him.
718
00:52:46,729 --> 00:52:50,275
For years, Erwin lived
in a kind of hell
719
00:52:50,761 --> 00:52:52,965
made worse by the fact
that he was despised
720
00:52:53,066 --> 00:52:56,382
for having learned
to survive in this hell
721
00:52:57,002 --> 00:53:00,318
and even savor its horrors.
722
00:53:04,330 --> 00:53:06,850
Sister Mathilda!
Sister Francisca!
723
00:53:07,433 --> 00:53:08,994
You can help, too.
724
00:53:16,970 --> 00:53:19,174
It's all right now. You may go.
725
00:53:20,169 --> 00:53:21,730
Take him home
726
00:53:21,866 --> 00:53:24,354
and make sure
he does himself no harm.
727
00:53:34,186 --> 00:53:37,153
And one fine summer evening
728
00:53:37,641 --> 00:53:40,456
an old woman
came to their cottage
729
00:53:41,033 --> 00:53:45,288
carrying a heavy load
of firewood.
730
00:53:48,234 --> 00:53:50,601
And she asked the mother
731
00:53:50,697 --> 00:53:52,552
whether her children
could help her
732
00:53:52,649 --> 00:53:54,820
carry the wood into the forest.
733
00:53:55,881 --> 00:53:58,118
The mother said a prayer
734
00:53:59,433 --> 00:54:02,248
for she didn't
trust the old woman
735
00:54:02,730 --> 00:54:07,585
and the children had always been
forbidden to go into the woods.
736
00:54:08,937 --> 00:54:13,127
So the old woman put a curse
on the cottage
737
00:54:13,225 --> 00:54:15,080
and its occupants.
738
00:54:15,178 --> 00:54:16,869
Because I love you...
739
00:54:17,546 --> 00:54:19,717
Sleep, baby.
740
00:54:20,553 --> 00:54:22,463
Go on, Zora
741
00:54:23,977 --> 00:54:25,668
and I'll fall asleep.
742
00:54:26,601 --> 00:54:28,510
Please, please go on.
743
00:54:29,353 --> 00:54:30,531
One day...
744
00:54:31,338 --> 00:54:35,560
the parents
went to market in the town.
745
00:54:36,298 --> 00:54:40,454
Again they forbade the children
746
00:54:40,809 --> 00:54:44,355
under threat of punishment,
to go into the forest.
747
00:54:44,874 --> 00:54:47,175
But as life will have it
748
00:54:47,977 --> 00:54:51,272
no sooner had the parents
disappeared over the horizon
749
00:54:52,425 --> 00:54:56,615
when magic powers
drew the children into the woods
750
00:54:56,906 --> 00:55:01,608
powers that were stronger
than any threat of punishment.
751
00:55:03,178 --> 00:55:06,080
They came to a clearing
752
00:55:06,633 --> 00:55:10,856
and there before them
stood the old woman.
753
00:55:11,177 --> 00:55:13,566
The children turned in fear
754
00:55:14,538 --> 00:55:17,833
to flee from the old witch
755
00:55:19,273 --> 00:55:22,339
but she cackled hideously
756
00:55:22,570 --> 00:55:25,057
and uttered a magic spell
757
00:55:25,577 --> 00:55:28,098
and the children
froze in their tracks.
758
00:55:29,546 --> 00:55:31,880
She cackled again
759
00:55:32,330 --> 00:55:35,494
and transformed the little boy
760
00:55:35,721 --> 00:55:37,314
into a mushroom
761
00:55:37,801 --> 00:55:41,117
and his sister into a snail.
762
00:55:42,249 --> 00:55:44,136
Soon night fell
763
00:55:45,385 --> 00:55:52,706
and the children were afraid of
what their parents would say.
764
00:55:53,705 --> 00:55:57,218
Then the little girl, the snail
765
00:55:57,834 --> 00:56:01,892
told her brother she was hungry.
766
00:56:02,025 --> 00:56:03,684
And he, the mushroom
767
00:56:04,202 --> 00:56:08,544
allowed her to eat of him.
768
00:56:09,866 --> 00:56:12,997
So she bit a little piece
769
00:56:13,098 --> 00:56:14,624
off the mushroom
770
00:56:15,882 --> 00:56:18,053
and her brother cried,
771
00:56:18,858 --> 00:56:22,632
"You've bitten off my right ear!"
772
00:56:24,362 --> 00:56:28,104
His sister wept
and had a guilty conscience.
773
00:56:30,441 --> 00:56:33,757
But soon she was hungry again
774
00:56:33,866 --> 00:56:37,640
and he let her eat a little more.
775
00:56:37,737 --> 00:56:39,079
And he said,
776
00:56:40,073 --> 00:56:46,369
"Sister, this time
you bit off my left foot."
777
00:57:09,545 --> 00:57:11,170
Hands up, Christoph!
778
00:57:17,930 --> 00:57:19,239
Cut it out, Elvira!
779
00:57:19,338 --> 00:57:22,436
We've no time for games like that.
We must go.
780
00:57:22,569 --> 00:57:23,715
Come on!
781
00:57:28,490 --> 00:57:31,108
How often have I tried
to get you a job in movies?
782
00:57:31,209 --> 00:57:33,544
But no, you're not interested.
Do you know what you are?
783
00:57:33,642 --> 00:57:34,951
You're a lard-ass!
784
00:57:35,049 --> 00:57:38,181
How many women have I met
since I've been with you?
785
00:57:39,754 --> 00:57:41,761
I don't know why I stay with you.
786
00:57:41,865 --> 00:57:44,582
Out of pity. What else?
787
00:57:44,681 --> 00:57:46,307
You've clung to me
like a leech for six years.
788
00:57:46,409 --> 00:57:47,903
No initiative.
No will of your own.
789
00:57:48,009 --> 00:57:49,503
I'm wasting my life with you.
790
00:57:58,346 --> 00:58:00,134
Gen. Augusto Pinochet
791
00:58:00,393 --> 00:58:03,295
Commander-in-Chief of the military,
and President of Chile...
792
00:58:03,402 --> 00:58:06,718
since he rose to power
in 1973.
793
00:58:07,498 --> 00:58:10,978
Since then, Chile has been
transformed, his supporters say
794
00:58:11,082 --> 00:58:13,864
from a state of chaos
to one of order and discipline.
795
00:58:16,234 --> 00:58:18,689
- Don't you have a key?
- If you lock it from the inside!
796
00:58:18,793 --> 00:58:21,543
God! What's up here?
797
00:58:22,185 --> 00:58:24,706
Tell me where you've come from...
and on foot.
798
00:58:24,841 --> 00:58:27,776
I told them to drop me
at the railroad crossing.
799
00:58:28,297 --> 00:58:29,890
I never know with you.
800
00:58:29,961 --> 00:58:31,849
- At 5 o'clock in the morning.
- Why not?
801
00:58:31,977 --> 00:58:33,635
With the baker's daughter?
802
00:58:33,737 --> 00:58:36,039
That's none
of your business, Jean.
803
00:58:36,521 --> 00:58:39,783
To interpret it
as part of a childhood
804
00:58:40,585 --> 00:58:42,528
that one can't
regard as a childhood
805
00:58:42,633 --> 00:58:44,324
in the normal sense.
806
00:58:45,961 --> 00:58:48,001
There are quite different
807
00:58:49,833 --> 00:58:52,703
I'm here to tell you
it's all over between us.
808
00:58:53,545 --> 00:58:55,879
You said so yourself
before I left.
809
00:58:57,418 --> 00:58:59,523
I know exactly what I'm doing.
810
00:59:07,913 --> 00:59:09,735
- You know exactly?
- Yes.
811
00:59:11,210 --> 00:59:13,730
What are you waiting for then?
Beat it!
812
00:59:17,065 --> 00:59:20,481
Jean, that's enough, okay?
I'm exhausted.
813
00:59:20,585 --> 00:59:22,592
And I have to get up again.
814
00:59:24,905 --> 00:59:27,719
Are you crazy?
Are you out of your mind?
815
00:59:30,889 --> 00:59:34,184
Every morning, the prisoners
sang the national anthem.
816
00:59:34,313 --> 00:59:37,826
"Beloved fatherland, you'll be
either the grave of liberty
817
00:59:37,929 --> 00:59:41,246
"or a refuge for the oppressed."
818
00:59:44,905 --> 00:59:46,596
What are you standing around for?
819
00:59:46,697 --> 00:59:48,966
- You can't keep doing this to me.
- It's none of your business.
820
00:59:49,065 --> 00:59:51,748
If you'd stayed up there, you
wouldn't know what I was doing.
821
00:59:51,849 --> 00:59:54,434
Do you really believe that?
That's the least...
822
00:59:54,537 --> 00:59:56,064
I'll leave when it suits me.
823
00:59:56,169 --> 00:59:58,177
Why don't you go to sleep?
824
00:59:58,601 --> 01:00:00,030
The light's on half
the night up there.
825
01:00:00,169 --> 01:00:01,860
Because I can't.
826
01:00:02,537 --> 01:00:04,064
I'm scared alone.
827
01:00:04,201 --> 01:00:06,852
When my parents divorced
I was six.
828
01:00:06,953 --> 01:00:09,800
I went to live with my mother,
and I had to learn
829
01:00:09,929 --> 01:00:14,566
to relate
to one particular person.
830
01:00:14,889 --> 01:00:18,271
Do you fear failing
831
01:00:18,377 --> 01:00:19,686
in your private relationships?
832
01:00:19,785 --> 01:00:22,436
What do you mean "fear"?
I'm always failing.
833
01:00:22,537 --> 01:00:24,479
Less prominent
supporters of Allende
834
01:00:24,585 --> 01:00:28,294
became the victims of the newly
formed secret police, the DINAH.
835
01:00:28,617 --> 01:00:31,073
Often a simple arrest
would end in death.
836
01:00:31,177 --> 01:00:33,065
I want my freedom again.
837
01:00:33,193 --> 01:00:34,142
I want...
838
01:00:34,281 --> 01:00:36,834
I want to go out
on Saturday and Sunday.
839
01:00:37,033 --> 01:00:38,888
I don't want you
visiting my parents anymore.
840
01:00:38,985 --> 01:00:40,545
I hope, through my stories
841
01:00:40,649 --> 01:00:45,951
to change myself, as far as it
lies within my power.
842
01:00:47,049 --> 01:00:48,610
But change is a strange thing.
843
01:00:48,713 --> 01:00:52,804
We change ourselves
much more slowly than we think.
844
01:00:53,065 --> 01:00:55,170
Oh no! What do you want now?
845
01:00:56,041 --> 01:00:57,219
You're always at my heels.
846
01:00:57,321 --> 01:01:02,077
In December 1977,
General Pinochet held a plebiscite.
847
01:01:02,409 --> 01:01:04,231
The question addressed
to Chileans was:
848
01:01:04,361 --> 01:01:07,427
"Are you prepared, in view of
international aggression against...
849
01:01:07,561 --> 01:01:09,503
"the government of your
fatherland...
850
01:01:09,641 --> 01:01:13,253
"to support Gen. Pinochet in
defending the honor of Chile?"
851
01:01:14,057 --> 01:01:18,312
The government equated a "no"
vote practically with high treason.
852
01:01:19,081 --> 01:01:22,758
I don't want
to see you anymore. Understand?
853
01:01:22,857 --> 01:01:25,607
I'm fed up with you
and your stupid movies.
854
01:01:25,705 --> 01:01:27,014
Get out of my life!
855
01:01:27,113 --> 01:01:28,422
Have I done anything to you?
856
01:01:28,521 --> 01:01:29,928
What have you been doing to me
for six years?
857
01:01:30,025 --> 01:01:31,486
Because I love you.
858
01:01:31,593 --> 01:01:33,797
I don't love you anymore.
It's all over.
859
01:01:33,897 --> 01:01:35,839
You mean nothing to me now.
860
01:01:35,977 --> 01:01:38,824
I'm looking for the key.
I'm going.
861
01:01:43,849 --> 01:01:45,475
Because I love you.
862
01:01:45,577 --> 01:01:48,544
What drives you
to make so many pictures?
863
01:01:49,737 --> 01:01:53,119
It must be
a special kind of insanity.
864
01:01:53,225 --> 01:01:56,738
Life seemed dreadful, but I still
found myself interesting.
865
01:01:57,673 --> 01:01:59,015
Now it's the other way round.
866
01:01:59,113 --> 01:02:02,691
I know that life's wonderful,
but that I'm excluded from it.
867
01:02:03,369 --> 01:02:05,573
You were lucky. You were loved.
868
01:02:07,369 --> 01:02:09,060
Francoise loved you.
869
01:02:09,193 --> 01:02:10,535
I loved you.
870
01:02:11,401 --> 01:02:13,506
Many more women will love you.
871
01:02:14,281 --> 01:02:16,386
- You really loved me?
- Oh yes.
872
01:02:16,489 --> 01:02:21,094
In my private life, everything
could change this evening.
873
01:02:21,641 --> 01:02:23,048
I hope it may.
874
01:02:25,032 --> 01:02:27,782
If nothing were to happen...
875
01:02:27,881 --> 01:02:31,842
if I don't meet someone tonight
or tomorrow or the day after...
876
01:02:31,945 --> 01:02:34,334
everything will go on as it is.
877
01:02:35,369 --> 01:02:39,198
I won't force myself to change it.
878
01:02:39,401 --> 01:02:42,630
Nor would I force myself
to keep it the same.
879
01:02:42,761 --> 01:02:44,769
The general
missed no opportunity
880
01:02:46,121 --> 01:02:48,226
to express his contempt
for parliamentary democracy:
881
01:02:54,505 --> 01:02:58,214
"Chile needs neither politicians
nor political parties.
882
01:02:58,537 --> 01:03:03,392
"It needs Chileans, and
a Chilean to lead them forward."
883
01:03:34,665 --> 01:03:38,210
Anton Saitz, Broker
884
01:04:10,888 --> 01:04:12,776
A beer and a shot of bitters.
885
01:04:12,873 --> 01:04:15,294
- You know I stand here every day?
- No.
886
01:04:15,944 --> 01:04:17,373
How could you?
887
01:04:18,153 --> 01:04:19,560
But it's true.
888
01:04:20,361 --> 01:04:21,768
Every day
889
01:04:22,089 --> 01:04:24,511
from ten in the morning
to six at night
890
01:04:24,649 --> 01:04:26,209
for 17 months.
891
01:04:27,208 --> 01:04:28,997
Isn't that remarkable?
892
01:04:29,097 --> 01:04:31,366
Believe me, it is remarkable.
893
01:04:32,777 --> 01:04:35,078
I looked up at the 16th floor
894
01:04:35,913 --> 01:04:38,149
8 hours a day, 5 days a week
895
01:04:39,080 --> 01:04:41,415
for a year and five months.
896
01:04:43,369 --> 01:04:44,962
- Does that surprise you?
- No.
897
01:04:45,065 --> 01:04:47,007
I knew it would.
898
01:04:47,657 --> 01:04:49,446
It surprises everyone.
899
01:04:49,737 --> 01:04:51,461
The idea's compelling.
900
01:04:53,065 --> 01:04:55,399
You must listen
when I talk to you!
901
01:04:55,497 --> 01:04:59,142
- But I...
- Nothing but excuses. I know.
902
01:05:01,321 --> 01:05:02,662
Did you know...
903
01:05:02,761 --> 01:05:05,412
the owner has his office
on the 16th floor?
904
01:05:05,512 --> 01:05:07,171
- No.
- There you are.
905
01:05:08,425 --> 01:05:11,392
Believe me, he does.
He owns the whole building.
906
01:05:12,232 --> 01:05:13,759
Saitz is his name.
907
01:05:13,929 --> 01:05:15,587
First name's Anton.
908
01:05:18,377 --> 01:05:19,587
Saitz...
909
01:05:19,689 --> 01:05:21,063
with an "ai".
910
01:05:22,249 --> 01:05:25,063
He hates it
when people spell his name wrong.
911
01:05:26,345 --> 01:05:27,686
I know that...
912
01:05:28,137 --> 01:05:30,276
but you don't know how I know.
913
01:05:30,664 --> 01:05:32,672
You don't know much at all.
914
01:05:32,840 --> 01:05:34,848
But I'll tell you...
915
01:05:36,457 --> 01:05:39,239
although I don't know
why I should tell you.
916
01:05:39,912 --> 01:05:42,498
I used to work for this guy Saitz.
917
01:05:43,689 --> 01:05:45,511
Until 17 months ago...
918
01:05:45,993 --> 01:05:47,553
I worked for him.
919
01:05:49,257 --> 01:05:50,915
Till 17 months ago.
920
01:05:52,105 --> 01:05:54,308
Then he threw me out. Overnight.
921
01:05:55,080 --> 01:05:57,502
Since then I've been standing
here, looking up there...
922
01:05:57,641 --> 01:05:59,070
from 10 till 6.
923
01:06:01,833 --> 01:06:04,615
Can you guess why he fired me?
924
01:06:04,776 --> 01:06:07,264
- I don't think so.
- I couldn't either.
925
01:06:08,073 --> 01:06:10,462
It's so weird,
nobody would ever guess.
926
01:06:13,129 --> 01:06:15,714
I have cancer.
It's true, kidney cancer.
927
01:06:16,617 --> 01:06:17,697
Believe me.
928
01:06:17,801 --> 01:06:21,445
And Saitz can't stand
having sick people around him.
929
01:06:21,544 --> 01:06:23,933
He can afford to indulge his whims.
930
01:06:24,201 --> 01:06:26,405
He can afford anything he wants.
931
01:06:27,720 --> 01:06:30,022
Don't you believe
what I'm saying?
932
01:06:31,785 --> 01:06:33,443
You can believe me.
933
01:06:38,376 --> 01:06:41,693
There are plenty of
tales about him:
934
01:06:42,472 --> 01:06:44,131
how he got the money
935
01:06:44,232 --> 01:06:46,120
to build blocks like that.
936
01:06:47,657 --> 01:06:50,340
All the pieces
of the puzzle fit together.
937
01:06:52,361 --> 01:06:56,136
It all started when he was in
a concentration camp.
938
01:06:56,264 --> 01:06:58,403
He was just a kid then,
but he survived the war
939
01:06:58,536 --> 01:07:02,213
with his head full
of a dream called America.
940
01:07:03,240 --> 01:07:07,583
His journey to the New world ended
in the Frankfurt station area
941
01:07:08,617 --> 01:07:11,813
where he made his first pile
with small-time racketeering
942
01:07:11,913 --> 01:07:13,768
in the "meat" trade, I'm told.
943
01:07:13,865 --> 01:07:17,345
The details
seem to have been forgotten.
944
01:07:17,449 --> 01:07:19,488
- Meat trading?
- That's right.
945
01:07:19,593 --> 01:07:22,440
- Forgotten?
- Because it's not important.
946
01:07:22,536 --> 01:07:25,853
Some people look at it that way.
Others want nothing to do with it.
947
01:07:26,120 --> 01:07:29,568
And suddenly you're interested
in unimportant details.
948
01:07:29,864 --> 01:07:31,752
But that's not uncommon.
949
01:07:33,096 --> 01:07:35,365
In my story, this guy...
950
01:07:35,464 --> 01:07:37,374
Anton Saitz, with an "ai"
951
01:07:38,600 --> 01:07:42,561
invested his ill-gotten gains
in a whorehouse
952
01:07:43,081 --> 01:07:44,968
which he soon
takes over completely
953
01:07:45,064 --> 01:07:48,098
and runs with an iron hand
954
01:07:48,200 --> 01:07:51,135
in the way he'd learned
in the concentration camp.
955
01:07:51,529 --> 01:07:54,758
A brothel run on the lines
of a concentration camp.
956
01:07:55,401 --> 01:07:57,059
The whole set-up
functions perfectly.
957
01:07:57,160 --> 01:08:00,477
Saitz gets richer and richer,
earns so much money...
958
01:08:00,969 --> 01:08:03,838
that he can buy his first building,
an old place, which he tears down.
959
01:08:03,976 --> 01:08:07,773
He builds a new one.
He's on his way up...
960
01:08:08,297 --> 01:08:10,664
to the 16th story of this building
961
01:08:10,921 --> 01:08:14,117
from where he rules
many people and many things.
962
01:08:14,217 --> 01:08:15,166
Thank you.
963
01:08:15,273 --> 01:08:17,826
You have cut me to the quick.
964
01:08:19,369 --> 01:08:21,824
Don't forget...
Saitz with "ai"
965
01:08:23,080 --> 01:08:24,390
16th floor.
966
01:10:33,224 --> 01:10:34,751
Everything okay?
967
01:12:42,888 --> 01:12:45,506
Sorry. Could you
give me a light, please?
968
01:12:45,672 --> 01:12:48,934
I'm sitting around here and
don't know where to get a light.
969
01:12:49,064 --> 01:12:51,552
Otherwise,
just pretend I'm not here...
970
01:13:11,240 --> 01:13:12,288
Thanks.
971
01:13:12,392 --> 01:13:14,629
- Would you like one?
- No, thanks.
972
01:13:15,497 --> 01:13:17,700
Are you going to hang yourself?
973
01:13:21,192 --> 01:13:22,436
Naturally.
974
01:13:35,176 --> 01:13:36,518
Do you mind?
975
01:13:37,352 --> 01:13:39,262
Does this building belong to you?
976
01:13:39,368 --> 01:13:41,572
No, I just wanted to eat here.
977
01:13:41,673 --> 01:13:44,258
Would you like something to eat?
978
01:13:44,360 --> 01:13:48,615
I have some bread and cheese
and a bottle of red wine with me
979
01:13:48,712 --> 01:13:50,272
but no corkscrew.
980
01:13:53,064 --> 01:13:54,690
Give me the bottle.
981
01:13:55,208 --> 01:13:56,615
I'll open it.
982
01:13:59,752 --> 01:14:00,898
Thanks.
983
01:14:03,240 --> 01:14:08,805
It's an old story with the red wine
and the French bread and cheese
984
01:14:09,096 --> 01:14:10,984
almost a bit sentimental
985
01:14:11,081 --> 01:14:13,731
when I think about it.
986
01:14:14,440 --> 01:14:17,058
But what would life be
without sentiment?
987
01:14:17,512 --> 01:14:19,203
Pretty sad, I'd say.
988
01:14:19,912 --> 01:14:21,920
It all started with cheese.
989
01:14:22,184 --> 01:14:23,908
Meat nauseated Anton.
990
01:14:24,552 --> 01:14:27,847
We were in meat trading
at the time.
991
01:14:28,296 --> 01:14:31,592
Anton couldn't stand
the smell of dead animals
992
01:14:31,880 --> 01:14:34,401
because of the blood
in particular.
993
01:14:34,504 --> 01:14:38,017
He stopped eating meat overnight.
994
01:14:38,504 --> 01:14:40,446
That's how it all started.
995
01:14:41,320 --> 01:14:43,557
It's as simple as that, you see?
996
01:14:47,944 --> 01:14:49,286
Is the wine good?
997
01:14:49,384 --> 01:14:50,332
Fine, thanks.
998
01:14:50,441 --> 01:14:51,368
Why...
999
01:14:51,464 --> 01:14:52,412
I mean, why?
1000
01:14:52,520 --> 01:14:54,494
- Why I want to hang myself?
- Yes.
1001
01:14:54,600 --> 01:14:58,942
I don't want to let things go on
being real because I perceive them.
1002
01:14:59,433 --> 01:15:00,360
What things?
1003
01:15:00,456 --> 01:15:03,805
Feelings, for instance,
or pictures, letters, memories
1004
01:15:03,944 --> 01:15:05,732
rocks, laid and forgotten
1005
01:15:05,832 --> 01:15:08,483
at the moment of death,
in an awareness of pain
1006
01:15:08,584 --> 01:15:11,584
the universe, Solaris...
the world of viruses...
1007
01:15:11,688 --> 01:15:13,925
- Things in general, you understand?
- No...
1008
01:15:14,024 --> 01:15:15,551
That's exactly what I mean:
1009
01:15:15,657 --> 01:15:18,755
your negation as an example of the
seemingly effective principle
1010
01:15:18,856 --> 01:15:20,645
of the power to negate.
1011
01:15:23,081 --> 01:15:25,023
Maybe you're right.
1012
01:15:25,576 --> 01:15:28,064
But that doesn't change things
for me.
1013
01:15:28,456 --> 01:15:31,751
I tried to put an end
to my life once, too
1014
01:15:32,104 --> 01:15:33,992
because it just caused me pain
1015
01:15:34,120 --> 01:15:35,582
and revolted me
1016
01:15:37,000 --> 01:15:40,383
made me feel deep down inside
an incurable loathing of myself.
1017
01:15:40,488 --> 01:15:43,008
I'd just come back
from Casablanca.
1018
01:15:43,112 --> 01:15:45,600
A certain person
had forced me into oblivion
1019
01:15:45,640 --> 01:15:50,397
someone who merely had
to smile his smile once too often.
1020
01:15:50,504 --> 01:15:52,959
By pure chance,
believe it or not
1021
01:15:53,064 --> 01:15:56,359
however incredible it may sound
1022
01:15:56,456 --> 01:15:58,049
my life was saved.
1023
01:16:03,016 --> 01:16:06,311
My ego was forced
to learn to put up with me
1024
01:16:06,984 --> 01:16:08,807
to bear the unbearable.
1025
01:16:14,344 --> 01:16:17,246
If you want to know
the moral worth of people
1026
01:16:17,352 --> 01:16:19,392
as a whole and in general
1027
01:16:19,496 --> 01:16:22,627
just look at their fate
as a whole and in general:
1028
01:16:23,240 --> 01:16:26,274
nothing but shortcomings,
misery, anguish, death.
1029
01:16:26,664 --> 01:16:28,671
There is an eternal justice
1030
01:16:28,776 --> 01:16:31,394
and were they not
so worthless, in general
1031
01:16:31,497 --> 01:16:34,431
their fate would not,
in general, be so sad.
1032
01:16:35,176 --> 01:16:38,951
we can, therefore, say: the world
itself is the Day of Judgement.
1033
01:16:39,048 --> 01:16:41,601
But it would be
a great misunderstanding
1034
01:16:41,704 --> 01:16:44,770
to see that as a negation
of the will to live
1035
01:16:44,872 --> 01:16:48,800
to see suicide
as an act of negation.
1036
01:16:49,160 --> 01:16:50,502
Far from it:
1037
01:16:50,664 --> 01:16:52,486
the negation of the will to exist
1038
01:16:52,584 --> 01:16:55,780
is a bold affirmation
of the will
1039
01:16:55,880 --> 01:17:00,070
since negation means renouncing
not life's sufferings
1040
01:17:00,232 --> 01:17:02,436
but its joys.
1041
01:17:02,536 --> 01:17:07,205
The suicide wants life and
simply rejects the conditions
1042
01:17:07,304 --> 01:17:09,443
under which he experiences it.
1043
01:17:09,928 --> 01:17:14,435
The suicide does not renounce the
will to live; he renounces life
1044
01:17:14,696 --> 01:17:17,664
by destroying the manifestation
of his own life.
1045
01:17:19,080 --> 01:17:21,284
I think you'd better do it now.
1046
01:17:32,040 --> 01:17:33,982
I don't mind if you watch.
1047
01:18:04,968 --> 01:18:06,397
Excuse me, I...
1048
01:18:09,032 --> 01:18:10,559
Can't you hear me?
1049
01:18:11,816 --> 01:18:13,343
Hey, listen!
1050
01:18:19,688 --> 01:18:22,077
You almost
scared the life out of me.
1051
01:18:23,304 --> 01:18:25,344
Why didn't you say anything?
1052
01:18:27,208 --> 01:18:29,095
The old trick, eh?
1053
01:18:29,672 --> 01:18:32,454
Trying to make me think
I'm hard of hearing.
1054
01:18:33,063 --> 01:18:34,111
Here!
1055
01:18:34,760 --> 01:18:36,647
Did my husband send you?
1056
01:18:36,744 --> 01:18:38,599
All he has in his head
1057
01:18:39,304 --> 01:18:40,646
are my ears.
1058
01:18:40,936 --> 01:18:43,587
No. I don't even
know your husband.
1059
01:18:44,424 --> 01:18:45,985
It's just that...
1060
01:18:46,472 --> 01:18:47,682
somebody's hanged
himself down there.
1061
01:18:47,784 --> 01:18:48,732
What was that?
1062
01:18:48,872 --> 01:18:51,720
A man just hanged himself!
On the floor below!
1063
01:18:51,816 --> 01:18:53,670
You don't have to shout.
1064
01:18:53,928 --> 01:18:56,863
It happens every few weeks
with so many empty offices.
1065
01:18:56,968 --> 01:18:59,171
- Oh, in that case...
- Precisely.
1066
01:18:59,912 --> 01:19:01,286
One other thing:
1067
01:19:01,384 --> 01:19:02,496
I'm...
1068
01:19:04,264 --> 01:19:06,151
looking for Mr. Saitz's office.
1069
01:19:06,248 --> 01:19:07,906
Last door at the end.
1070
01:19:08,008 --> 01:19:09,153
Thanks.
1071
01:19:39,432 --> 01:19:40,577
You knocked?
1072
01:19:40,680 --> 01:19:43,975
Yes, I'd like to speak
to Mr. Anton Saitz.
1073
01:19:44,103 --> 01:19:46,689
Sorry, ma'am,
Mr. Saitz is in conference.
1074
01:19:47,368 --> 01:19:49,735
Mr. Saitz is usually in conference.
1075
01:19:50,920 --> 01:19:52,033
You understand?
1076
01:19:52,136 --> 01:19:53,565
Yes, of course.
1077
01:19:54,440 --> 01:19:56,000
It's just that...
1078
01:19:56,520 --> 01:19:59,836
It's as if I had sawdust
between my ears.
1079
01:20:00,840 --> 01:20:03,229
You don't take me seriously,
do you?
1080
01:20:03,464 --> 01:20:04,958
I know I cut a ridiculous figure.
1081
01:20:05,064 --> 01:20:06,952
Of course I'm ridiculous.
1082
01:20:07,624 --> 01:20:09,217
It's just that...
1083
01:20:11,656 --> 01:20:13,794
I was so wrapped up in myself.
1084
01:20:14,696 --> 01:20:18,012
In my mind, you know.
1085
01:20:19,304 --> 01:20:22,599
You talk and talk,
and think your thoughts
1086
01:20:23,496 --> 01:20:25,830
and in the end
you forget to think.
1087
01:20:25,960 --> 01:20:27,389
That's why...
1088
01:20:28,232 --> 01:20:30,719
for me, at least...
1089
01:20:32,392 --> 01:20:33,799
it would be...
1090
01:20:34,600 --> 01:20:36,836
fairly crucial for me
to see him.
1091
01:20:37,415 --> 01:20:38,822
That's why...
1092
01:20:39,016 --> 01:20:40,293
But you...
1093
01:20:40,904 --> 01:20:42,594
Excuse me... You...
1094
01:20:42,696 --> 01:20:44,322
Do you know him...
1095
01:20:44,648 --> 01:20:45,957
personally?
1096
01:20:46,536 --> 01:20:47,648
Anton?
1097
01:20:48,935 --> 01:20:52,231
Why yes, of course.
1098
01:20:53,448 --> 01:20:57,604
I know Anton Saitz.
1099
01:20:57,864 --> 01:20:59,391
If you know him...
1100
01:20:59,784 --> 01:21:02,402
then maybe you know
one of the passwords.
1101
01:21:03,144 --> 01:21:05,249
Then I could take you to him.
1102
01:21:06,280 --> 01:21:08,963
But only if you know
one of the passwords.
1103
01:21:09,064 --> 01:21:10,340
Passwords?
1104
01:21:11,656 --> 01:21:13,663
I don't know any passwords.
1105
01:21:15,176 --> 01:21:17,510
We knew each other
a long time ago.
1106
01:21:17,928 --> 01:21:19,270
An eternity.
1107
01:21:20,584 --> 01:21:22,406
In another life almost.
1108
01:21:25,576 --> 01:21:27,332
How funny that sounds:
1109
01:21:28,295 --> 01:21:29,986
"In another life."
1110
01:21:32,520 --> 01:21:35,203
Then I suppose I'd better be going.
1111
01:21:35,304 --> 01:21:38,687
- I'm sorry, but...
- A password, you said?
1112
01:21:39,720 --> 01:21:43,331
Yes, that's how he screened
himself off in the past.
1113
01:21:43,432 --> 01:21:45,920
- When he opened his whorehouse.
- What?
1114
01:21:46,664 --> 01:21:49,446
- He opened a whorehouse?
- Of course. And?
1115
01:21:49,767 --> 01:21:51,655
Jeez! Without any "and"?
1116
01:21:54,376 --> 01:21:55,488
My God.
1117
01:21:57,032 --> 01:21:58,821
Let me think.
1118
01:22:01,799 --> 01:22:03,326
Wait a minute...
1119
01:22:05,096 --> 01:22:06,754
A thousand times...
1120
01:22:07,848 --> 01:22:12,005
A thousand...
No, that's not enough, it was...
1121
01:22:16,488 --> 01:22:18,015
"Bergen-Belsen."
1122
01:22:20,168 --> 01:22:22,110
That's it!
"Bergen-Belsen."
1123
01:22:25,736 --> 01:22:28,453
Why didn't you say that right away?
Come in!
1124
01:22:28,616 --> 01:22:29,696
That's code 1A.
1125
01:22:29,831 --> 01:22:33,127
"Bergen-Belsen" works
in every situation.
1126
01:22:34,120 --> 01:22:36,902
It's the only password
that's never changed.
1127
01:22:37,063 --> 01:22:40,893
With "Bergen-Belsen" you can even
disturb him when he's screwing.
1128
01:22:41,096 --> 01:22:42,558
That's no joke.
1129
01:22:43,431 --> 01:22:46,431
That's usually the worst thing
you can do to him.
1130
01:22:46,536 --> 01:22:47,812
He's peculiar in that respect.
1131
01:22:47,912 --> 01:22:49,472
Doesn't anyone work here anymore?
1132
01:22:49,576 --> 01:22:51,299
No, not for ages now.
1133
01:22:51,528 --> 01:22:53,088
That's how it is.
1134
01:22:53,256 --> 01:22:55,230
It used to be a madhouse here.
1135
01:22:55,336 --> 01:22:57,027
Those were the days!
1136
01:22:57,319 --> 01:23:00,516
We used to buy up old apartment
blocks and evict the tenants.
1137
01:23:00,615 --> 01:23:02,525
It was damned tough sometimes...
1138
01:23:02,664 --> 01:23:03,973
believe me...
1139
01:23:05,896 --> 01:23:08,318
but we managed it.
1140
01:23:08,776 --> 01:23:09,921
My God!
1141
01:23:10,952 --> 01:23:14,247
Then we demolished
the old rat traps
1142
01:23:15,688 --> 01:23:17,379
and built new ones
1143
01:23:18,536 --> 01:23:20,063
high-rise mostly.
1144
01:23:20,263 --> 01:23:23,525
We sold them for a good profit.
Great, huh?
1145
01:23:25,704 --> 01:23:28,966
Oh, we had our share
of troubles, too.
1146
01:23:29,192 --> 01:23:31,079
People are envious
1147
01:23:31,943 --> 01:23:34,016
but the city was on our side.
1148
01:23:34,888 --> 01:23:37,059
The police chief's
a friend of his.
1149
01:23:37,160 --> 01:23:39,364
The mayor, too, in those days
1150
01:23:39,463 --> 01:23:42,562
and some of the dudes
on the city council.
1151
01:23:42,951 --> 01:23:46,694
The plan itself wasn't his.
1152
01:23:47,368 --> 01:23:48,742
That already existed.
1153
01:23:48,840 --> 01:23:51,589
Resolutions and decisions
had already been made.
1154
01:23:51,687 --> 01:23:54,753
He just did the dirty work
1155
01:23:54,856 --> 01:23:58,468
for those who made the decisions
1156
01:23:58,567 --> 01:24:02,593
but who wanted to keep their
hands clean and be re-elected.
1157
01:24:03,080 --> 01:24:06,276
Power's more important...
1158
01:24:06,376 --> 01:24:09,671
to them than money, which they
allowed others to pocket...
1159
01:24:09,800 --> 01:24:11,523
like us, for example.
1160
01:24:11,880 --> 01:24:14,465
- And now?
- I don't know enough about...
1161
01:24:15,400 --> 01:24:18,716
economic trends, inflation
and all that crap.
1162
01:24:19,720 --> 01:24:22,306
So I can't really explain
what I'm telling you.
1163
01:24:22,407 --> 01:24:24,676
But right now,
foreclosure seems to be...
1164
01:24:24,776 --> 01:24:28,420
the business with a big future.
1165
01:24:30,056 --> 01:24:32,194
Sounds strange, but as you said
1166
01:24:32,328 --> 01:24:33,789
the things are done by others
1167
01:24:33,927 --> 01:24:37,222
and decisions are made at the top
for those down below.
1168
01:24:37,960 --> 01:24:40,099
And we just execute things
1169
01:24:40,520 --> 01:24:42,276
that others are interested in.
1170
01:24:42,375 --> 01:24:44,383
I certainly didn't say that.
1171
01:24:45,320 --> 01:24:47,524
But if you heard it that way.
1172
01:24:50,280 --> 01:24:52,320
How long have you known him?
1173
01:24:52,744 --> 01:24:54,631
I told you.
1174
01:24:54,888 --> 01:24:56,230
An eternity.
1175
01:24:56,328 --> 01:24:57,473
Were you in the business?
1176
01:24:57,575 --> 01:25:00,892
I mean,
you mentioned a whorehouse.
1177
01:25:01,096 --> 01:25:02,241
No, no.
1178
01:25:03,304 --> 01:25:05,213
It wasn't business.
1179
01:25:05,767 --> 01:25:06,945
It was...
1180
01:25:08,616 --> 01:25:10,339
I mean, I...
1181
01:25:13,959 --> 01:25:16,993
I was in love with him.
1182
01:25:18,888 --> 01:25:20,000
In love?
1183
01:25:21,063 --> 01:25:22,557
With Anton Saitz?
1184
01:25:23,047 --> 01:25:24,542
Does that surprise you?
1185
01:25:24,648 --> 01:25:26,557
Nobody loves Anton Saitz.
1186
01:25:26,823 --> 01:25:27,968
Nobody.
1187
01:25:28,520 --> 01:25:30,462
He doesn't want to be loved.
1188
01:26:07,559 --> 01:26:08,966
Disappointed?
1189
01:26:09,256 --> 01:26:10,685
No. Not at all.
1190
01:26:13,640 --> 01:26:15,134
On the contrary.
1191
01:26:15,335 --> 01:26:16,896
It's just that...
1192
01:26:19,079 --> 01:26:21,021
Laugh at me if you like.
1193
01:26:22,983 --> 01:26:24,478
It's just that I...
1194
01:26:24,583 --> 01:26:25,565
What?
1195
01:26:26,215 --> 01:26:27,230
I...
1196
01:26:28,648 --> 01:26:29,924
Tell me...
1197
01:26:30,663 --> 01:26:32,190
which one is it?
1198
01:26:33,927 --> 01:26:35,040
Please.
1199
01:26:35,239 --> 01:26:38,555
- Didn't you just say?
- I know. It was true.
1200
01:26:38,920 --> 01:26:40,513
Go ahead and laugh.
1201
01:26:40,647 --> 01:26:42,273
It's funny, I know.
1202
01:26:45,255 --> 01:26:47,230
It's your business.
1203
01:26:48,039 --> 01:26:50,406
The skinny guy
in the tennis outfit.
1204
01:26:57,704 --> 01:26:59,678
Anton Saitz.
1205
01:27:01,223 --> 01:27:05,249
S for salt, A for Auschwitz,
I for I, T for time, Z for Zora.
1206
01:27:17,287 --> 01:27:18,694
- Smolik!
- Here, sir!
1207
01:27:18,824 --> 01:27:20,547
- What's been keeping you?
- Sorry, sir.
1208
01:27:20,648 --> 01:27:23,964
There was a lady with code 1A.
1209
01:27:26,312 --> 01:27:27,741
Bergen-Belsen?
1210
01:27:27,976 --> 01:27:29,437
That's right, sir.
1211
01:27:29,544 --> 01:27:31,071
Didn't you let her in?
1212
01:27:31,175 --> 01:27:35,201
Sure I did. Anyone who knows
code 1A is in like Flynn.
1213
01:27:35,943 --> 01:27:37,121
Come in.
1214
01:27:48,071 --> 01:27:50,690
So you know code 1A?
1215
01:27:54,408 --> 01:27:55,488
You...
1216
01:27:56,455 --> 01:27:58,397
won't remember me anymore.
1217
01:27:59,335 --> 01:28:01,124
It's been a long time.
1218
01:28:05,895 --> 01:28:07,172
I'm Erwin.
1219
01:28:20,359 --> 01:28:21,505
Sorry...
1220
01:28:22,184 --> 01:28:24,191
I have an old picture of me.
1221
01:28:39,079 --> 01:28:41,021
You really don't remember.
1222
01:28:42,056 --> 01:28:43,103
Yes, yes...
1223
01:28:44,359 --> 01:28:45,636
Somehow...
1224
01:28:46,184 --> 01:28:48,191
there was something with...
1225
01:28:48,455 --> 01:28:49,535
Erwin?
1226
01:28:50,503 --> 01:28:52,030
I'll think of it.
1227
01:28:52,712 --> 01:28:54,534
But let's do our dance first.
1228
01:28:54,632 --> 01:28:56,192
- Turn it on.
- Yes, sir!
1229
01:28:56,296 --> 01:28:57,954
It'll come back to me.
1230
01:28:58,055 --> 01:28:59,430
- Smolik!
- Yes, sir?
1231
01:28:59,528 --> 01:29:01,633
What is this, anyway?
1232
01:29:01,735 --> 01:29:03,361
A girls' boarding school, kid.
1233
01:29:03,463 --> 01:29:05,503
What do they all want of me?
1234
01:29:05,607 --> 01:29:07,582
A party to celebrate your arrival.
1235
01:29:07,687 --> 01:29:10,753
I don't want a party.
1236
01:29:10,856 --> 01:29:12,514
I don't want a party!
I don't want one.
1237
01:29:12,616 --> 01:29:16,227
We're not making
any exceptions for you!
1238
01:29:16,839 --> 01:29:18,749
No, no, no.
1239
01:30:31,047 --> 01:30:32,803
I want to march in the front now.
1240
01:30:32,904 --> 01:30:34,878
You can't march in front.
1241
01:30:34,983 --> 01:30:36,324
But I want to!
1242
01:30:36,423 --> 01:30:38,311
Go ahead and march, then!
1243
01:31:18,855 --> 01:31:20,797
Not bad for the beginning.
1244
01:31:23,623 --> 01:31:24,736
Erwin.
1245
01:31:29,831 --> 01:31:31,075
I'm sorry.
1246
01:32:04,551 --> 01:32:06,526
Let's do the finale! Quick!
1247
01:32:15,847 --> 01:32:17,123
Elvira.
1248
01:32:18,151 --> 01:32:19,678
Now I've got it!
1249
01:32:22,439 --> 01:32:24,676
I didn't have
such a good memory.
1250
01:32:26,023 --> 01:32:28,609
Hey, you're really
splitting your seams.
1251
01:32:29,127 --> 01:32:30,436
You're fat.
1252
01:32:31,240 --> 01:32:32,766
That comes from drinking.
1253
01:32:32,903 --> 01:32:34,562
That doesn't matter.
1254
01:32:37,671 --> 01:32:40,038
Most people
have grown fat nowadays.
1255
01:32:43,527 --> 01:32:45,087
It's great, boys!
1256
01:32:45,543 --> 01:32:47,103
It's mind blowing.
1257
01:32:47,527 --> 01:32:48,988
Real meschugge.
1258
01:32:49,799 --> 01:32:52,482
She used to be a boy
by the name of Erwin.
1259
01:32:52,775 --> 01:32:54,084
Am I right?
1260
01:32:54,855 --> 01:32:58,051
One fine day he boards a plane,
flies to Casablanca...
1261
01:32:58,151 --> 01:32:59,973
and has his dick cut off.
1262
01:33:00,071 --> 01:33:01,478
Just like that.
1263
01:33:02,919 --> 01:33:04,512
And because of me.
1264
01:33:09,511 --> 01:33:11,202
It's true, isn't it?
1265
01:33:13,703 --> 01:33:15,164
What times they were.
1266
01:33:15,271 --> 01:33:17,791
And now you're back.
Just like that.
1267
01:33:19,367 --> 01:33:21,309
You haven't changed a bit.
1268
01:33:21,511 --> 01:33:23,170
Stubborn as a mule.
1269
01:33:23,399 --> 01:33:24,959
Cost what it may.
1270
01:33:25,863 --> 01:33:27,423
Maybe you're right.
1271
01:33:27,527 --> 01:33:29,316
But I came because
1272
01:33:29,607 --> 01:33:33,665
I gave an interview.
1273
01:33:34,215 --> 01:33:35,840
I told them
1274
01:33:36,776 --> 01:33:40,071
a lot of stories from the past
about you. I don't know why.
1275
01:33:40,167 --> 01:33:41,574
It just happened.
1276
01:33:41,703 --> 01:33:45,729
Anyway, I thought
I had to apologize, and...
1277
01:33:45,831 --> 01:33:47,107
Forget it.
1278
01:33:47,847 --> 01:33:50,268
People write
so much crap about me.
1279
01:33:51,047 --> 01:33:53,251
If I were to get upset
every time...
1280
01:33:53,351 --> 01:33:54,496
My God.
1281
01:33:55,687 --> 01:33:58,469
The main thing is they get
my name right. Saitz with "ai".
1282
01:33:58,567 --> 01:34:01,436
- That's what's important, isn't it?
- Sure, boss.
1283
01:34:01,703 --> 01:34:03,426
That's right.
1284
01:34:03,527 --> 01:34:04,989
Shut your trap.
1285
01:34:15,687 --> 01:34:18,501
You were the one
who made the good coffee
1286
01:34:19,143 --> 01:34:21,248
like my grandma used to make.
1287
01:34:21,671 --> 01:34:23,558
That was you, wasn't it?
1288
01:34:25,639 --> 01:34:27,165
Sure it was you.
1289
01:34:31,751 --> 01:34:35,329
Why don't we go to your place,
and you can make some coffee?
1290
01:34:51,111 --> 01:34:53,053
Is there no raid today?
1291
01:34:53,415 --> 01:34:55,171
Not today, boss, tomorrow.
1292
01:34:55,271 --> 01:34:56,253
How come?
1293
01:34:56,359 --> 01:34:58,977
Only Monday,
Wednesday and Friday.
1294
01:34:59,079 --> 01:35:00,541
Today's Tuesday.
1295
01:35:01,159 --> 01:35:03,013
Those were your orders.
1296
01:35:03,111 --> 01:35:04,321
I'm sorry.
1297
01:35:04,423 --> 01:35:06,365
It's okay. Get in the car.
1298
01:35:19,719 --> 01:35:21,475
You must excuse my place
1299
01:35:21,575 --> 01:35:23,549
for being in such a mess...
1300
01:35:30,310 --> 01:35:32,929
Oh Lord, it can't be true!
1301
01:35:33,511 --> 01:35:34,721
What a laugh!
1302
01:35:34,823 --> 01:35:36,350
What's so funny?
1303
01:35:36,871 --> 01:35:38,976
He bet me you would say that.
1304
01:35:39,079 --> 01:35:41,250
About your place
being in a mess. They all do.
1305
01:35:41,351 --> 01:35:42,431
Come on, then.
1306
01:35:42,535 --> 01:35:44,259
Here, boss. 20 marks.
1307
01:35:45,223 --> 01:35:46,946
Braun and Kuhlmann can go.
You stay here.
1308
01:35:47,079 --> 01:35:48,257
Yes, sir!
1309
01:35:52,839 --> 01:35:54,661
That takes the cake.
1310
01:35:55,463 --> 01:35:58,780
I'll go into the kitchen.
Make yourself comfortable.
1311
01:36:24,231 --> 01:36:27,394
Big tall stranger.
1312
01:36:30,247 --> 01:36:31,359
Hello...
1313
01:36:31,815 --> 01:36:33,855
strange and beautiful woman.
1314
01:36:34,311 --> 01:36:36,253
I almost didn't see you.
1315
01:36:36,455 --> 01:36:38,178
Because I'm so small.
1316
01:36:38,759 --> 01:36:42,021
Besides, I haven't eaten
anything for days
1317
01:36:42,119 --> 01:36:43,613
and I've shrunk.
1318
01:36:43,719 --> 01:36:46,501
Elvira locked me in by mistake.
1319
01:36:46,599 --> 01:36:48,454
Glad to meet you. I'm Red Zora.
1320
01:36:48,583 --> 01:36:50,949
Hello. I'm Anton Saitz.
1321
01:36:51,399 --> 01:36:52,741
With an "ai".
1322
01:36:54,375 --> 01:36:55,520
Really?
1323
01:36:57,991 --> 01:37:00,576
Then it was because of you
1324
01:37:00,679 --> 01:37:03,046
that Elvira... back then?
1325
01:37:05,191 --> 01:37:06,718
No, it can't be.
1326
01:37:09,863 --> 01:37:11,040
Why not?
1327
01:37:12,231 --> 01:37:14,686
Because of you
she went to Casablanca?
1328
01:37:15,814 --> 01:37:17,953
You wouldn't have
thought it of me?
1329
01:37:18,631 --> 01:37:20,093
Sure, but...
1330
01:37:21,607 --> 01:37:23,429
are you really the guy?
1331
01:37:24,071 --> 01:37:25,413
I reckon so.
1332
01:37:25,799 --> 01:37:27,108
Jesus, Mary and Joseph!
1333
01:37:28,935 --> 01:37:32,251
I've always wanted to meet you,
so you could spit on me.
1334
01:37:32,359 --> 01:37:33,603
You want me to spit on you?
1335
01:37:33,702 --> 01:37:35,808
Three times, please.
1336
01:37:35,911 --> 01:37:38,050
Over my left shoulder, please.
1337
01:37:38,887 --> 01:37:40,513
Three times over your?
1338
01:37:40,615 --> 01:37:42,404
Over my left shoulder.
1339
01:37:42,919 --> 01:37:44,380
It brings luck.
1340
01:37:44,487 --> 01:37:47,520
When a guy like you spits,
it brings a girl luck.
1341
01:38:42,343 --> 01:38:45,659
I always wanted to know
1342
01:38:45,767 --> 01:38:48,701
how it was with Elvira back then.
1343
01:38:49,671 --> 01:38:51,875
We worked together, that's all.
1344
01:38:52,166 --> 01:38:55,036
Small-time things, like meat.
1345
01:38:56,455 --> 01:38:59,041
There were five of us,
with Erwin and me.
1346
01:39:00,454 --> 01:39:04,229
He used to look at me so strangely,
and one day I asked him why.
1347
01:39:04,742 --> 01:39:06,433
He said he loved me.
1348
01:39:08,967 --> 01:39:11,585
I laughed and said
that would be fine...
1349
01:39:11,687 --> 01:39:13,509
if only he were a girl.
1350
01:39:13,927 --> 01:39:15,749
And he laughed as well.
1351
01:39:16,839 --> 01:39:18,333
That's all there was.
1352
01:39:18,438 --> 01:39:20,129
And then it happened.
1353
01:39:21,126 --> 01:39:22,533
That was all.
1354
01:41:32,935 --> 01:41:35,204
- Are you going out?
- No.
1355
01:41:36,742 --> 01:41:38,717
I'm reading Kafka's The Castle.
1356
01:41:38,887 --> 01:41:40,796
Do you like it?
1357
01:41:41,894 --> 01:41:43,171
Of course.
1358
01:41:44,455 --> 01:41:46,178
But it's a bit scary.
1359
01:41:48,295 --> 01:41:49,855
Irene! Marie-Ann!
1360
01:41:51,527 --> 01:41:52,639
Daddy!
1361
01:41:53,799 --> 01:41:54,944
Elvira!
1362
01:41:56,423 --> 01:41:57,830
What's up?
1363
01:41:58,887 --> 01:42:00,577
Have you gone crazy?
1364
01:42:12,518 --> 01:42:14,406
Sit down with us, Daddy.
1365
01:42:24,486 --> 01:42:26,788
I'm sorry,
I didn't mean to laugh.
1366
01:42:30,663 --> 01:42:32,702
- Would you like something to eat?
- No, thanks.
1367
01:42:32,807 --> 01:42:35,295
- But a glass of red wine?
- Yes, please.
1368
01:42:37,287 --> 01:42:38,880
Are you all right?
1369
01:42:39,463 --> 01:42:41,601
- Why do you ask?
- I don't know.
1370
01:42:44,519 --> 01:42:46,526
I want you both to be happy.
1371
01:42:49,415 --> 01:42:51,357
I'm so fond of you, Daddy.
1372
01:42:52,742 --> 01:42:54,881
- Really?
- Yes, really.
1373
01:42:58,342 --> 01:43:00,764
- Did you go see that man?
- Naturally.
1374
01:43:01,766 --> 01:43:03,359
And what happened?
1375
01:43:04,775 --> 01:43:06,465
I begged his pardon.
1376
01:43:09,031 --> 01:43:10,558
What did he say?
1377
01:43:12,167 --> 01:43:13,596
He forgave me.
1378
01:43:23,271 --> 01:43:26,238
- Eat your food, dear.
- I don't want anymore, Mom.
1379
01:43:26,342 --> 01:43:27,869
Tell her to eat.
1380
01:43:28,742 --> 01:43:30,171
Children have to eat.
1381
01:43:30,278 --> 01:43:32,417
See. Your father says so, too.
1382
01:43:32,679 --> 01:43:35,995
Very well, I'll become as fat as
a barrel just to please you.
1383
01:43:36,103 --> 01:43:37,280
Nonsense.
1384
01:43:38,087 --> 01:43:39,647
It's okay, Daddy.
1385
01:43:57,862 --> 01:43:58,975
Daddy...
1386
01:44:01,831 --> 01:44:03,358
what do you say?
1387
01:44:04,230 --> 01:44:06,532
I want to stay here in Frankfurt...
1388
01:44:08,135 --> 01:44:11,909
but Mom says I must stand on my
own feet and study in Munich.
1389
01:44:13,447 --> 01:44:15,552
Your mother knows you better.
1390
01:44:24,134 --> 01:44:25,149
I...
1391
01:44:27,174 --> 01:44:31,168
I've been wearing men's clothes
quite a lot lately.
1392
01:44:32,486 --> 01:44:34,942
I tried to find work
in my old trade...
1393
01:44:35,654 --> 01:44:37,378
which I used to like.
1394
01:44:38,151 --> 01:44:40,354
I can't go on living like this.
1395
01:44:40,806 --> 01:44:43,043
I see no reason to go on living.
1396
01:44:44,550 --> 01:44:47,649
I would so much like
to be with you two again...
1397
01:44:49,063 --> 01:44:52,892
to be together
as we never were properly before.
1398
01:45:21,638 --> 01:45:23,810
You know I've always liked you...
1399
01:45:26,182 --> 01:45:27,556
and still do.
1400
01:45:29,702 --> 01:45:31,425
And I always will...
1401
01:45:33,254 --> 01:45:34,716
be fond of you.
1402
01:45:36,007 --> 01:45:38,014
- But...
- Don't go on, Irene.
1403
01:45:39,399 --> 01:45:41,820
I know you have to say
it's too late.
1404
01:45:42,279 --> 01:45:43,293
And I...
1405
01:45:43,398 --> 01:45:44,740
Yes, Elvira.
1406
01:45:45,574 --> 01:45:47,036
It is too late.
1407
01:45:53,543 --> 01:45:54,623
Daddy!
1408
01:46:03,399 --> 01:46:08,156
Once upon a time,
there was a very nice man
1409
01:46:09,255 --> 01:46:12,004
who came from Swabia.
1410
01:46:13,030 --> 01:46:16,064
He looked like a benign old uncle.
1411
01:46:17,126 --> 01:46:21,185
Although he was thin-lipped,
nobody seemed to notice.
1412
01:46:21,350 --> 01:46:25,060
His lips were pursed
and looked like a cupid's bow.
1413
01:46:27,078 --> 01:46:30,461
Everyone would say about him:
1414
01:46:30,598 --> 01:46:34,308
"Look what a noble man this is.
1415
01:46:34,406 --> 01:46:37,854
"How good he is.
What a benign person he is."
1416
01:46:38,950 --> 01:46:42,660
And he was always around
1417
01:46:42,759 --> 01:46:47,363
whenever there was some event,
1418
01:46:47,462 --> 01:46:53,277
or a great celebration,
or some terribly sad day.
1419
01:46:53,767 --> 01:46:54,912
Every year...
1420
01:46:55,014 --> 01:46:57,981
in the sad month of November
1421
01:46:58,598 --> 01:47:01,598
the Swabians gathered
1422
01:47:02,534 --> 01:47:07,269
to commemorate a terrible war
in their history.
1423
01:47:08,710 --> 01:47:11,525
The man appeared before them
1424
01:47:11,622 --> 01:47:13,989
looked deep into their eyes
1425
01:47:15,206 --> 01:47:16,318
and said:
1426
01:47:16,422 --> 01:47:19,717
"You must be contrite
1427
01:47:20,134 --> 01:47:22,622
"because your war was unjust.
1428
01:47:22,727 --> 01:47:24,156
"You were wicked.
1429
01:47:24,262 --> 01:47:28,256
"On the last day of the war
you executed three men
1430
01:47:28,390 --> 01:47:31,390
"who were against the war.
They were the good men.
1431
01:47:31,910 --> 01:47:34,758
"Now you must go
in sackcloth and ashes.
1432
01:47:36,775 --> 01:47:39,808
"Let us bow our heads
in honor of...
1433
01:47:39,910 --> 01:47:42,244
"those three resistance fighters."
1434
01:47:42,790 --> 01:47:47,132
Then a tiny, elderly man
appeared and said:
1435
01:47:47,238 --> 01:47:51,067
"You, sir, are a very nice person.
But tell me...
1436
01:47:51,175 --> 01:47:54,491
"You were present yourself
as a judge
1437
01:47:54,854 --> 01:47:57,026
"and as a public prosecutor...
1438
01:47:57,126 --> 01:48:00,901
"and helped condemn those men
to death. You are also guilty."
1439
01:48:01,414 --> 01:48:04,710
And the nice man replied:
"What's that?"
1440
01:48:05,190 --> 01:48:07,557
And he considered and said:
1441
01:48:07,654 --> 01:48:09,279
"I don't remember."
1442
01:48:17,766 --> 01:48:19,260
There's a strange
man in the house.
1443
01:48:19,367 --> 01:48:20,708
Nonsense.
1444
01:48:28,806 --> 01:48:30,017
Sorry...
1445
01:48:30,950 --> 01:48:32,444
to disturb you.
1446
01:48:32,870 --> 01:48:35,390
I cut my hair off today
1447
01:48:35,526 --> 01:48:38,309
and went out onto the street.
And my hair...
1448
01:48:38,502 --> 01:48:42,048
And I put on these shoes.
1449
01:48:42,566 --> 01:48:44,159
But I didn't know where to go.
1450
01:48:44,262 --> 01:48:45,855
and I happened...
1451
01:48:46,886 --> 01:48:49,308
to come by your place
1452
01:48:49,958 --> 01:48:52,162
and I thought I'd just come up.
1453
01:48:52,359 --> 01:48:54,398
I wanted to talk to someone.
1454
01:48:58,119 --> 01:49:00,606
- It's pretty late.
- It's after eleven.
1455
01:49:01,510 --> 01:49:03,103
It's after eleven.
1456
01:49:03,527 --> 01:49:05,828
You have to get up
early tomorrow and drive.
1457
01:49:05,958 --> 01:49:08,259
I have to get up early and drive.
1458
01:49:08,742 --> 01:49:09,887
Yes, I understand.
1459
01:49:10,022 --> 01:49:12,542
I have my life
and other people have theirs.
1460
01:49:12,646 --> 01:49:17,567
It's my stupid head
that makes me forget.
1461
01:49:17,958 --> 01:49:19,519
Nonsense, Elvira.
1462
01:49:19,654 --> 01:49:21,825
Your head's not stupid.
1463
01:49:21,926 --> 01:49:23,551
There's nothing
stupid about your head.
1464
01:49:23,654 --> 01:49:26,272
I know I'm not basically stupid.
1465
01:49:26,982 --> 01:49:28,924
There's just something
1466
01:49:29,158 --> 01:49:32,474
in my head
that makes me feel...
1467
01:49:33,574 --> 01:49:35,265
paralyzed sometimes.
1468
01:49:35,686 --> 01:49:38,785
We've discussed that already.
Is it no better?
1469
01:49:38,982 --> 01:49:42,560
No, it's not better.
Just look at my hair.
1470
01:49:42,822 --> 01:49:44,862
I've cut my hair off.
1471
01:49:50,566 --> 01:49:54,560
I'm so sorry for you
that you don't like me like this.
1472
01:49:54,726 --> 01:49:56,831
A few hairs don't make
any difference.
1473
01:49:56,935 --> 01:49:59,684
- Nobody will notice.
- Oh yes they will.
1474
01:49:59,782 --> 01:50:01,921
I know that better than you do.
1475
01:50:02,022 --> 01:50:06,594
Everyone stares at my hair,
but I can't bear the sight of it.
1476
01:50:07,174 --> 01:50:09,149
Well, if you will keep
looking at it...
1477
01:50:09,286 --> 01:50:12,450
I'd like so much to talk to you.
1478
01:50:12,838 --> 01:50:15,522
I felt so well
when we did that interview.
1479
01:50:16,166 --> 01:50:19,014
My pains were better
for weeks afterwards.
1480
01:50:21,926 --> 01:50:25,221
Well, I suppose I could come
and drink a beer with you.
1481
01:50:25,318 --> 01:50:26,463
Oh, that would be nice.
1482
01:50:26,566 --> 01:50:29,882
You told me to remind you
to get to bed earlier.
1483
01:50:29,990 --> 01:50:31,299
That's right.
1484
01:50:31,398 --> 01:50:34,147
If I go out now,
I won't get home till late.
1485
01:50:34,246 --> 01:50:37,824
And I have to drive the car
early tomorrow, you see?
1486
01:50:39,718 --> 01:50:40,831
Yes...
1487
01:50:42,790 --> 01:50:43,870
I see.
1488
01:50:49,478 --> 01:50:51,747
Goodnight, Elvira.
1489
01:50:52,070 --> 01:50:53,728
Maybe some other time.
1490
01:50:53,830 --> 01:50:55,106
Goodnight.
1491
01:52:04,742 --> 01:52:06,946
Happiness? What is happiness?
1492
01:52:07,046 --> 01:52:09,085
Of course I'm not happy.
1493
01:52:09,190 --> 01:52:11,459
There's no such thing as happiness.
1494
01:52:11,558 --> 01:52:13,663
It is the quest...
1495
01:52:14,182 --> 01:52:17,727
the process that's exciting...
1496
01:52:18,534 --> 01:52:20,955
not the outcome... happiness.
1497
01:52:21,094 --> 01:52:22,916
That can't be exciting.
1498
01:52:23,750 --> 01:52:26,565
I invent the pains
1499
01:52:27,270 --> 01:52:29,277
to find out
what normal life's about.
1500
01:52:29,382 --> 01:52:30,756
I'm not sure...
1501
01:52:30,982 --> 01:52:34,146
but maybe that's what
people call masochism
1502
01:52:34,246 --> 01:52:38,883
Although I don't believe it is.
1503
01:52:40,294 --> 01:52:45,891
I think it just helps to create
a clearer picture of myself.
1504
01:52:45,990 --> 01:52:49,787
I like to reconstruct
the conversations I used to have
1505
01:52:49,894 --> 01:52:52,032
when I was 20 or so
1506
01:52:52,166 --> 01:52:54,532
and talked to people,
to customers.
1507
01:52:54,662 --> 01:52:56,091
And I thought...
1508
01:52:56,230 --> 01:52:59,230
it must be possible
to solve the problems.
1509
01:52:59,334 --> 01:53:00,611
If I were...
1510
01:53:00,998 --> 01:53:03,748
say, Adenauer,
I could go to Moscow
1511
01:53:03,846 --> 01:53:05,951
and talk to them
1512
01:53:06,054 --> 01:53:09,218
and then
the prisoners would be released.
1513
01:53:09,318 --> 01:53:11,740
I have a quite different
yearning now.
1514
01:53:12,038 --> 01:53:15,005
It was so hard to conform
1515
01:53:15,526 --> 01:53:21,636
to situations I was forced into,
or I forced myself into.
1516
01:53:22,790 --> 01:53:24,612
It makes no difference.
1517
01:53:25,509 --> 01:53:27,965
Maybe I'd like to...
1518
01:53:29,318 --> 01:53:30,245
I don't know.
1519
01:53:30,374 --> 01:53:32,708
Maybe I'd like to go back
to Anton
1520
01:53:33,734 --> 01:53:34,683
or to Irene...
1521
01:53:34,790 --> 01:53:37,659
Get dressed, Sybille.
We're going to Elvira's.
1522
01:53:37,766 --> 01:53:39,871
- I have a nasty feeling.
- Why?
1523
01:53:41,254 --> 01:53:43,556
Just a feeling.
What can I say?
1524
01:53:46,214 --> 01:53:49,313
The yearning for Anton
is something you hide from
1525
01:53:49,413 --> 01:53:51,169
or something I hide from.
1526
01:53:51,270 --> 01:53:54,020
With Christoph it was different.
1527
01:53:54,150 --> 01:53:56,289
I tried to give him
1528
01:53:56,422 --> 01:53:59,456
what I didn't get from Anton.
1529
01:53:59,558 --> 01:54:00,965
And I thought, maybe...
1530
01:54:01,094 --> 01:54:04,923
I could give it to Christoph.
1531
01:54:05,030 --> 01:54:08,379
But it didn't work out.
1532
01:54:09,254 --> 01:54:11,774
I have to search you
for weapons first.
1533
01:54:14,662 --> 01:54:18,339
Giving him so much that he'd
have some...
1534
01:54:18,886 --> 01:54:20,544
to give back to me.
1535
01:54:20,741 --> 01:54:24,003
That may sound calculating,
but it isn't.
1536
01:54:24,933 --> 01:54:30,116
Maybe it's...
what one calls love.
1537
01:54:30,214 --> 01:54:31,490