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1
00:00:06,000 --> 00:00:12,074
Advertise your product or brand here
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2
00:00:52,760 --> 00:00:54,479
Whoa!
3
00:00:55,640 --> 00:00:57,836
Hey! Buddy, excuse me.
I'm sorry, you're parking in my spot...
4
00:00:58,000 --> 00:00:59,480
Senior prank day.
5
00:01:00,120 --> 00:01:01,190
Yeah, but it's not a prank.
6
00:01:01,360 --> 00:01:04,000
You're just parking it in an assigned...
7
00:01:04,160 --> 00:01:05,355
That's fine. You're good.
8
00:01:05,520 --> 00:01:07,352
You're good. I'll find a new spot.
9
00:01:08,800 --> 00:01:09,995
- Fucking rent-a-cop.
- Guys!
10
00:01:10,160 --> 00:01:11,276
I need you to stop rocking the cart.
11
00:01:11,480 --> 00:01:12,470
Fuck you!
12
00:01:12,640 --> 00:01:13,630
I'm gonna write your names down.
13
00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:14,990
Well, that's not good.
14
00:01:19,160 --> 00:01:20,150
Whoo!
15
00:01:24,040 --> 00:01:25,315
Do it! Do it! Do it!
16
00:01:30,360 --> 00:01:32,829
This is gonna be a bad day.
17
00:01:33,000 --> 00:01:34,036
Oh, yeah.
18
00:01:34,200 --> 00:01:35,554
Wait up!
19
00:01:39,080 --> 00:01:40,116
Hey!
20
00:01:40,280 --> 00:01:41,396
Oh, fuck!
21
00:01:56,840 --> 00:01:58,433
You hold it right there.
22
00:01:58,600 --> 00:02:01,354
Now, outside my class,
I found our school's
23
00:02:01,520 --> 00:02:06,390
1971 championship bat in the trash can.
24
00:02:07,600 --> 00:02:10,115
I'm wondering who put it in there
25
00:02:10,280 --> 00:02:11,396
and why.
26
00:02:11,880 --> 00:02:14,076
We thought it'd be funny
to throw out the bat
27
00:02:14,240 --> 00:02:16,596
and put the computer in with porn.
28
00:02:17,480 --> 00:02:18,470
Put it back.
29
00:02:20,040 --> 00:02:21,076
Now!
30
00:02:23,600 --> 00:02:25,956
Now get y'all Rush Hour asses to class.
31
00:02:27,520 --> 00:02:28,670
Everybody!
32
00:02:32,840 --> 00:02:34,274
Where... Where is my mug?
33
00:02:34,440 --> 00:02:37,274
Why are people always taking my mug?
34
00:02:38,240 --> 00:02:39,913
You know, I know we're
a rough school and everything,
35
00:02:40,080 --> 00:02:42,197
and we don't usually have
control over the students,
36
00:02:42,360 --> 00:02:44,670
but this is the worst
I've ever seen the pranks.
37
00:02:44,840 --> 00:02:46,320
Really? I think it's hilarious.
38
00:02:46,520 --> 00:02:48,193
I'm thinking about
taking a shit in the pool.
39
00:02:49,040 --> 00:02:51,157
I want... I want to think
that you're joking.
40
00:02:51,320 --> 00:02:53,596
But for some reason,
I feel like you're not.
41
00:02:53,760 --> 00:02:55,353
I was just picturing everybody's faces.
42
00:02:55,520 --> 00:02:57,477
Yeah. I'm just saying
it's not a good day for this, you know?
43
00:02:57,640 --> 00:02:59,040
My wife was due three days ago.
44
00:02:59,240 --> 00:03:00,913
And I'm up all night
thinking about what I'm gonna say
45
00:03:01,080 --> 00:03:02,230
to the superintendent at 2:00.
46
00:03:02,400 --> 00:03:03,834
You know, I don't have anything planned.
47
00:03:04,000 --> 00:03:05,434
I know what I'm gonna say at my meeting.
48
00:03:05,680 --> 00:03:06,875
I'm gonna be like,
49
00:03:07,080 --> 00:03:09,959
"Fuck you for trying to make us
re-interview for our jobs again!"
50
00:03:10,280 --> 00:03:12,511
I put my blood, sweat, and tears
into my coaching.
51
00:03:12,680 --> 00:03:15,275
- Right.
- Not my fault we always in last place.
52
00:03:16,160 --> 00:03:17,879
Yeah, what... What is your record?
53
00:03:18,120 --> 00:03:19,600
These kids are un-coachable!
54
00:03:19,800 --> 00:03:21,473
It's very tough. It's very tough.
55
00:03:21,680 --> 00:03:24,036
Losing here is a tradition.
56
00:03:24,400 --> 00:03:25,629
It shouldn't be.
57
00:03:25,800 --> 00:03:26,995
- Yeah, it's a terrible tradition.
- Right?
58
00:03:27,160 --> 00:03:28,799
I'm trying my best
59
00:03:28,960 --> 00:03:31,350
not to get one of
these kids' moms pregnant.
60
00:03:31,560 --> 00:03:32,835
I'm trying.
61
00:03:33,000 --> 00:03:33,990
You're not gonna say that, are you?
62
00:03:34,160 --> 00:03:35,753
Hell no, Campbell.
63
00:03:35,920 --> 00:03:37,320
Be polite as shit.
64
00:03:37,480 --> 00:03:39,949
I went out and bought new
jeans for this motherfucker.
65
00:03:40,120 --> 00:03:41,839
And I hate long pants.
66
00:03:42,000 --> 00:03:43,719
Yeah, you got an exotic build.
67
00:03:44,240 --> 00:03:45,230
Fuck this!
68
00:03:45,400 --> 00:03:48,632
Twenty-two years and then,
"See you later!"
69
00:03:48,800 --> 00:03:53,397
Those assholes should have taken my class,
so they can manage a fucking budget!
70
00:03:54,320 --> 00:03:55,640
I'm taking this.
71
00:03:57,200 --> 00:03:58,190
Taking this.
72
00:03:58,440 --> 00:03:59,874
See? We're expendable.
73
00:04:00,040 --> 00:04:01,030
They fired Irv.
74
00:04:01,200 --> 00:04:02,429
This school's gonna fuck me?
75
00:04:02,600 --> 00:04:04,034
I'm gonna fuck it!
76
00:04:05,160 --> 00:04:06,310
Drop it!
77
00:04:07,920 --> 00:04:08,910
Oh, shit.
78
00:04:19,840 --> 00:04:20,830
Oh, fuck it!
79
00:04:29,960 --> 00:04:31,314
What the fuck is this?
80
00:04:32,680 --> 00:04:36,071
Don't have money for books,
but got money for this newfangled...
81
00:04:36,240 --> 00:04:38,391
He gonna fuck that coffee machine up.
82
00:04:38,560 --> 00:04:40,040
Is this a practical joke?
83
00:04:40,800 --> 00:04:42,632
Huh? You know I don't play that shit.
84
00:04:42,840 --> 00:04:44,877
How the fuck you work this bullshit?
85
00:04:47,960 --> 00:04:49,872
You. Campbell.
86
00:04:50,920 --> 00:04:51,910
Me?
87
00:04:52,080 --> 00:04:53,719
You the only one drinking coffee, right?
88
00:04:53,880 --> 00:04:55,030
Uh, yeah.
89
00:04:55,200 --> 00:04:58,591
No, I mean,
I got a light roast cappuccino.
90
00:04:58,760 --> 00:05:01,559
Well, get your light
roast ass over here and help me fix a cup.
91
00:05:02,000 --> 00:05:03,229
Right. Yeah, sure. Yeah.
92
00:05:03,400 --> 00:05:05,790
I'm sorry, I don't know
why I was resisting that.
93
00:05:05,960 --> 00:05:08,111
- Yeah, so it's a new machine.
- No shit.
94
00:05:08,280 --> 00:05:09,270
It's state of the art, though.
95
00:05:09,440 --> 00:05:11,591
All you gotta do is
put in your order, and it does the rest.
96
00:05:14,080 --> 00:05:15,070
Coffee.
97
00:05:17,000 --> 00:05:19,555
You know, I'll just... I'll do it for you,
and I think that's just gonna be the easiest.
98
00:05:20,080 --> 00:05:22,037
Right, so you got your
drink selections down here.
99
00:05:22,200 --> 00:05:23,759
And flavors, you got hazelnut...
100
00:05:23,920 --> 00:05:25,400
I just want regular coffee.
101
00:05:25,560 --> 00:05:27,313
Shoot. Uh...
102
00:05:27,480 --> 00:05:28,914
That doesn't seem to be an option.
103
00:05:29,240 --> 00:05:30,356
Um...
104
00:05:30,640 --> 00:05:32,438
How about an Americano?
That's basically the same thing.
105
00:05:32,640 --> 00:05:34,791
- Whatever.
- So I just pick "Americano", right?
106
00:05:34,960 --> 00:05:37,350
And then you can go medium, light, dark.
107
00:05:37,560 --> 00:05:40,678
You look like...
Or not look like, you would want...
108
00:05:40,840 --> 00:05:44,038
I'll go with medium.
And then you hit "brew."
109
00:05:51,760 --> 00:05:53,752
And it's done.
110
00:05:53,920 --> 00:05:54,910
Thank God.
111
00:05:55,120 --> 00:05:57,191
And one Americano. For you.
112
00:05:57,560 --> 00:05:59,074
All right. Cheers.
113
00:06:03,480 --> 00:06:05,199
Tastes like shit.
114
00:06:06,360 --> 00:06:07,794
Fucking waste of money.
115
00:06:08,440 --> 00:06:10,397
Shit don't even voice activate.
116
00:06:10,960 --> 00:06:12,314
That was awkward.
117
00:06:14,120 --> 00:06:19,479
"It takes courage to grow up and to
become who you really are."
118
00:06:19,640 --> 00:06:21,677
Right? E.E. Cummings wrote that.
119
00:06:21,840 --> 00:06:23,991
And, guys, you're growing up.
You're moving on.
120
00:06:24,160 --> 00:06:27,631
For many of you, this is gonna be the last
English class you're ever gonna take.
121
00:06:27,800 --> 00:06:30,395
So, um, I want you to remember something.
122
00:06:30,560 --> 00:06:33,200
Words are always going to matter.
123
00:06:33,640 --> 00:06:35,359
Right? What?
124
00:06:35,760 --> 00:06:37,160
Uh-oh! Uh...
125
00:06:37,360 --> 00:06:39,431
Something's funnier than
it should be, right?
126
00:06:39,600 --> 00:06:42,035
I'm missing the joke here. Is it me?
127
00:06:42,800 --> 00:06:44,712
"Mr. Dick Suck's English class!"
128
00:06:44,920 --> 00:06:46,912
Look, I'm down for the
senior pranks, I really am,
129
00:06:47,080 --> 00:06:49,276
but, frankly, I think this
one's a little homophobic, right?
130
00:06:49,440 --> 00:06:51,750
I mean, how does everybody
think this makes Blake feel?
131
00:06:54,120 --> 00:06:55,713
What's that supposed to mean?
132
00:06:55,920 --> 00:06:57,115
Oh, uh...
133
00:06:58,840 --> 00:07:02,470
- I'm sorry. It doesn't mean anything.
- No, no. It means something.
134
00:07:02,800 --> 00:07:03,995
Words matter, remember?
135
00:07:04,400 --> 00:07:05,390
Right. Yeah, no.
136
00:07:05,560 --> 00:07:08,155
I... I just meant because
you're politically conscious
137
00:07:08,360 --> 00:07:10,317
and you're sensitive.
138
00:07:10,480 --> 00:07:12,358
I'm not sensitive.
139
00:07:12,520 --> 00:07:13,840
I'm gay.
140
00:07:14,360 --> 00:07:17,353
And I wrote it and I drew the cat.
141
00:07:17,840 --> 00:07:19,832
And now there's a cat. What is...
142
00:07:20,040 --> 00:07:21,474
What is this?
143
00:07:21,640 --> 00:07:23,040
Now I'm Mr. Cat?
144
00:07:23,200 --> 00:07:26,671
Oh, I get it. I'm Mr. Pussy
because I'm a nice guy.
145
00:07:26,880 --> 00:07:29,600
I'm a pushover, right?
All right, guys, come on.
146
00:07:29,920 --> 00:07:32,594
I'm down for the pranks,
but frankly we're getting...
147
00:07:33,120 --> 00:07:35,874
And "Mr. Dick Suck's English class" again!
148
00:07:36,040 --> 00:07:37,269
In Sharpie!
149
00:07:38,880 --> 00:07:42,351
And now I have Ms. Grossman
peering through the window.
150
00:07:42,560 --> 00:07:44,392
Uh, excuse me for one second.
151
00:07:44,560 --> 00:07:45,994
- I'll be right back.
- All right, Blake!
152
00:07:46,160 --> 00:07:47,196
Yo, Blake turned a cat into a dick.
153
00:07:47,400 --> 00:07:48,390
- Hey!
- Hey.
154
00:07:48,560 --> 00:07:49,550
- Hi.
- Hey, how's it going?
155
00:07:49,720 --> 00:07:51,313
Uh, what's going on?
156
00:07:51,560 --> 00:07:53,040
I got some news for you about your job.
157
00:07:53,760 --> 00:07:55,240
Oh, my God. What do you...
What do you know?
158
00:07:55,400 --> 00:07:57,995
Wolinsky and Henderson just got fired.
159
00:07:58,960 --> 00:08:01,429
- Oh, my God! That's great!
- Right? Yeah!
160
00:08:01,600 --> 00:08:02,716
I mean, it's terrible because...
161
00:08:02,880 --> 00:08:03,996
I know, 'cause they got families.
162
00:08:04,160 --> 00:08:05,230
Yeah, they got the families
and everything.
163
00:08:05,400 --> 00:08:07,392
But they're not gonna
fire the whole English department, right?
164
00:08:07,560 --> 00:08:08,550
Exactly. That'd be crazy!
165
00:08:08,720 --> 00:08:10,837
Holly, thank you! I gotta call my wife.
That's fantastic.
166
00:08:13,080 --> 00:08:15,675
What the fuck was that?
Where did they get a horse?
167
00:08:15,840 --> 00:08:17,399
They stole it from the race track.
168
00:08:17,600 --> 00:08:20,035
They got it all hopped up
on homemade meth, you know,
169
00:08:20,200 --> 00:08:21,998
so it'd be amped up enough
to run through the hallways.
170
00:08:22,160 --> 00:08:23,879
- Yeah.
- It's not like the best batch, but...
171
00:08:24,040 --> 00:08:25,554
I'm sorry...
172
00:08:26,920 --> 00:08:28,912
- How do you know that?
- How do I know what?
173
00:08:29,080 --> 00:08:31,879
Holly, you're not doing meth again, right?
174
00:08:33,040 --> 00:08:35,430
Yeah. Yeah, just a little bit.
175
00:08:35,600 --> 00:08:38,434
- Don't do meth.
- No more homemade meth. Got it.
176
00:08:38,600 --> 00:08:39,795
No, no. No meth, period.
177
00:08:39,960 --> 00:08:41,599
When I'm on my period, don't do it?
178
00:08:41,880 --> 00:08:42,996
That's when I need it the most.
179
00:08:43,160 --> 00:08:44,435
Holly, you're the guidance counselor.
180
00:08:44,600 --> 00:08:46,432
- You've never done it?
- Oh, God, no. No.
181
00:08:46,600 --> 00:08:48,751
- Oh. Man, it's fucking great.
- Yeah.
182
00:08:48,960 --> 00:08:50,280
- Is it?
- Yeah!
183
00:08:50,440 --> 00:08:51,760
I think the best I've ever felt.
184
00:08:51,920 --> 00:08:52,910
Holly, this stuff's gotta stop.
185
00:08:53,080 --> 00:08:54,196
- Right.
- Right?
186
00:08:54,360 --> 00:08:55,510
Yeah, 'cause it's a gateway?
187
00:08:56,080 --> 00:08:58,436
- It's the finish line.
- There's worse stuff.
188
00:08:58,960 --> 00:09:00,474
I don't think I can help you.
All right, thanks.
189
00:09:00,680 --> 00:09:01,670
I gotta call my wife. Thank you, Holly.
190
00:09:01,840 --> 00:09:03,559
All right.
I'll take care of your classroom.
191
00:09:03,720 --> 00:09:04,995
Ooh, ooh, no, no, no! Don't do that.
192
00:09:05,160 --> 00:09:06,640
- What's that?
- They're fine. Yeah.
193
00:09:06,800 --> 00:09:08,234
Some of them are fine.
You know what I mean?
194
00:09:08,440 --> 00:09:09,794
- They're good-looking.
- Uh-oh. Yeah, no.
195
00:09:09,960 --> 00:09:11,155
Leave 'em alone.
196
00:09:11,360 --> 00:09:12,589
- Right?
- Right.
197
00:09:12,760 --> 00:09:13,750
- But thank you for the news.
- Yeah.
198
00:09:13,960 --> 00:09:15,235
- Thank you!
- You're welcome.
199
00:09:17,160 --> 00:09:19,550
Yo! Neil's gonna prank Strickland today.
200
00:09:19,720 --> 00:09:21,712
Strickland might legit kill Neil, bro.
201
00:09:21,880 --> 00:09:23,997
I know. It's gonna be epic!
202
00:09:24,160 --> 00:09:25,799
Whoa! What's happening here?
203
00:09:26,000 --> 00:09:27,992
You don't just come on
my field mowing nothing.
204
00:09:28,160 --> 00:09:29,196
So sorry, Coach.
205
00:09:29,360 --> 00:09:31,033
Principal Tyler said we have to mow here.
206
00:09:31,400 --> 00:09:33,357
- For real?
- Yeah.
207
00:09:34,640 --> 00:09:35,630
Wow.
208
00:09:35,960 --> 00:09:37,838
Good for you. Good for you!
209
00:09:38,000 --> 00:09:39,832
This is a gleaming example
210
00:09:40,000 --> 00:09:42,469
of people doing positive things out here.
211
00:09:42,840 --> 00:09:44,433
Y'all can hit the track.
212
00:09:44,800 --> 00:09:48,077
Yvette, all of the rolling your eyes in
the world ain't gonna get you nowhere.
213
00:09:48,680 --> 00:09:51,514
And tell your mother she never
text me back, damn it!
214
00:09:54,160 --> 00:09:56,516
- Hello?
- Hey! Honey, hi! How's it going?
215
00:09:56,680 --> 00:09:58,672
How you feeling?
Everything good? Everything okay?
216
00:09:58,840 --> 00:10:01,833
Well, I feel like I'm about to explode,
we're definitely gonna be late to school,
217
00:10:02,000 --> 00:10:03,559
and I'm on my fourth hairdo
for the talent show.
218
00:10:03,800 --> 00:10:04,790
Ah.
219
00:10:05,000 --> 00:10:06,434
Did you have your meeting
with the superintendent yet?
220
00:10:06,600 --> 00:10:08,990
Not yet. But that's why I'm calling,
actually. I wanna tell you that...
221
00:10:09,160 --> 00:10:10,150
- Dad...
- Yeah?
222
00:10:10,320 --> 00:10:12,198
I really want to change
the song to Big Sean.
223
00:10:12,680 --> 00:10:13,716
What?
224
00:10:13,920 --> 00:10:16,435
She wants to change the
song to a Big Sean song.
225
00:10:16,600 --> 00:10:18,080
Daddy didn't learn a Big Sean song, right?
226
00:10:18,240 --> 00:10:19,356
Daddy learned the song from Rent.
227
00:10:19,520 --> 00:10:21,352
- We can do the same dance moves.
- All right, look, Ally,
228
00:10:21,520 --> 00:10:23,079
I know this dance is
a big deal for you, okay?
229
00:10:23,240 --> 00:10:25,197
And I'm not gonna let you down.
230
00:10:25,360 --> 00:10:28,637
But it's way too late to change the song,
sweetie. Okay?
231
00:10:28,840 --> 00:10:29,830
- So, let me talk to Mommy...
- Okay.
232
00:10:30,000 --> 00:10:31,639
'Cause I got something
really important I wanna tell her.
233
00:10:31,800 --> 00:10:32,790
Did you get fired?
234
00:10:32,960 --> 00:10:34,189
No, no, no! My job is safe.
235
00:10:34,400 --> 00:10:35,800
Oh, honey, that is such great news.
236
00:10:35,960 --> 00:10:36,996
Isn't that great?
237
00:10:37,160 --> 00:10:39,072
I really cannot have you
getting fired right now, okay?
238
00:10:39,280 --> 00:10:40,873
We can't have that right now...
239
00:10:41,200 --> 00:10:42,236
That would be no good.
240
00:10:42,400 --> 00:10:43,800
It's the hottest thing I've ever seen.
241
00:10:43,960 --> 00:10:45,519
You know what, sweetie?
I gotta call you back.
242
00:10:45,680 --> 00:10:47,239
Some... Something weird
is going on around here.
243
00:10:47,400 --> 00:10:48,390
- Okay?
- Okay.
244
00:10:48,560 --> 00:10:50,438
Yeah. Tell Ally I'll see her at 2:30.
245
00:10:50,600 --> 00:10:51,716
Daddy says he'll see you at 2:30.
246
00:10:51,920 --> 00:10:52,910
- Bye, honey.
- All right. Bye, love.
247
00:10:53,080 --> 00:10:54,673
How'd it do that?
248
00:10:55,640 --> 00:10:58,155
Oh, I've literally never seen that before.
249
00:11:00,080 --> 00:11:02,197
- Oh, yeah. You want more?
- What the fuck?
250
00:11:03,720 --> 00:11:05,074
What the hell are you doing?
251
00:11:05,560 --> 00:11:07,040
Why did you open the door?
252
00:11:07,960 --> 00:11:09,633
You don't get to ask the questions, okay?
253
00:11:09,800 --> 00:11:11,154
Come on. Let's go. Get up!
254
00:11:11,320 --> 00:11:12,310
God!
255
00:11:12,520 --> 00:11:14,273
Really, I mean, you wanna
do that at home? Fine.
256
00:11:14,600 --> 00:11:16,398
- Are you starting again?
- Yes.
257
00:11:16,560 --> 00:11:18,438
Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop! Stop!
258
00:11:18,600 --> 00:11:19,590
Stop this!
259
00:11:19,760 --> 00:11:21,319
Don't look at me and smile
when you're doing it.
260
00:11:21,480 --> 00:11:23,039
Just stop... Just stop doing it!
261
00:11:27,760 --> 00:11:29,160
Bonjour, Ms. Monet.
262
00:11:29,320 --> 00:11:31,391
Bonjour, messieurs.
263
00:11:31,560 --> 00:11:33,791
Now get your asses back to class.
264
00:11:34,360 --> 00:11:35,874
Stop!
265
00:11:36,040 --> 00:11:37,872
The time for touching penises is over.
266
00:11:38,040 --> 00:11:40,430
Just let me get to the end! I'm so close.
267
00:11:40,600 --> 00:11:42,398
How do you even still have a boner?
268
00:11:42,600 --> 00:11:44,671
- Pull your pants back up.
- What is going on here?
269
00:11:45,040 --> 00:11:47,271
Oh, hey.
That must have sounded pretty bad.
270
00:11:47,440 --> 00:11:49,318
Uh, let me explain.
He was just masturbating.
271
00:11:49,560 --> 00:11:50,550
And he was just watching.
272
00:11:50,720 --> 00:11:51,790
I wasn't watching. I caught you.
273
00:11:51,960 --> 00:11:53,758
Just get out of here before I report you.
274
00:11:53,920 --> 00:11:55,149
Right. Okay, let's go. Back to class.
275
00:11:55,360 --> 00:11:56,953
But there's no reason to report me.
276
00:11:57,120 --> 00:11:59,032
- Let's go.
- Get back to class.
277
00:11:59,200 --> 00:12:00,236
Yeah. And again, to be clear,
278
00:12:00,440 --> 00:12:03,319
- I was not watching him. I caught him...
- You're gross.
279
00:12:03,520 --> 00:12:04,556
Unbelievable.
280
00:12:04,720 --> 00:12:06,473
Hey, light roast.
281
00:12:07,400 --> 00:12:08,470
Hey.
282
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:10,313
Do you know how to fix an AV system?
283
00:12:10,480 --> 00:12:11,470
Oh, uh...
284
00:12:11,760 --> 00:12:14,195
Yeah. But I'm so sorry.
I'm running late for my class.
285
00:12:14,360 --> 00:12:15,430
Sorry about that.
286
00:12:16,640 --> 00:12:17,630
Stop!
287
00:12:22,000 --> 00:12:24,037
Don't you take another step.
288
00:12:30,280 --> 00:12:31,430
One more step
289
00:12:35,600 --> 00:12:37,239
and you'd have been covered in paint.
290
00:12:42,480 --> 00:12:44,358
They've been putting 'em
all over the place.
291
00:12:44,520 --> 00:12:46,751
Holy crap. It's like a trip wire and...
292
00:12:46,920 --> 00:12:49,674
Oh, my God. You just saved me, man.
293
00:12:49,840 --> 00:12:52,116
Why aren't they this ambitious
with their classwork, huh?
294
00:12:52,840 --> 00:12:54,320
All right. You know what?
Yeah, I got a second.
295
00:12:54,480 --> 00:12:55,834
Let's take a look at that AV.
296
00:13:04,480 --> 00:13:07,791
So I'm trying to show the class
this Civil War documentary.
297
00:13:08,680 --> 00:13:11,275
Damn school wouldn't purchase
my Ken Burns DVDs,
298
00:13:11,440 --> 00:13:14,558
so I'm stuck with
this bullshit knock-off VHS.
299
00:13:14,720 --> 00:13:16,313
Ah, it's a bummer.
300
00:13:16,520 --> 00:13:18,034
Now, look. I push it in,
301
00:13:18,200 --> 00:13:19,475
it comes on...
302
00:13:19,640 --> 00:13:20,869
The troops called him Old Whittington.
303
00:13:21,040 --> 00:13:22,872
It plays for a minute and then...
304
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,880
Huh! Yeah, that's really weird.
305
00:13:26,280 --> 00:13:28,840
Eight times, I asked for a DVD player.
306
00:13:29,000 --> 00:13:30,229
No response.
307
00:13:30,400 --> 00:13:31,914
I'm this close to going up there
308
00:13:32,120 --> 00:13:34,635
and going postal on the whole
goddamn administration.
309
00:13:35,000 --> 00:13:36,275
This close.
310
00:13:37,960 --> 00:13:39,394
Yikes. Yeah.
311
00:13:40,120 --> 00:13:42,237
Well, you know what?
Maybe you just wanna give 'em
312
00:13:42,400 --> 00:13:43,914
a free period and call it a day.
313
00:13:45,400 --> 00:13:46,880
A free period?
314
00:13:47,720 --> 00:13:49,200
What good would that do?
315
00:13:50,040 --> 00:13:53,112
Oh, you know, it's the last day of school
and I'm sure they'd like you for it,
316
00:13:53,280 --> 00:13:55,033
and this isn't working, so...
317
00:13:56,600 --> 00:13:58,273
I don't need to be liked.
318
00:13:58,480 --> 00:13:59,630
I need to educate.
319
00:14:00,600 --> 00:14:03,911
You see, half of these kids
thought the Civil War
320
00:14:04,080 --> 00:14:07,073
was a fight between Batman and Superman.
321
00:14:08,280 --> 00:14:10,636
So, we don't get free periods.
Ain't that right?
322
00:14:10,800 --> 00:14:13,315
No free periods
in Mr. Strickland's history class, right?
323
00:14:13,520 --> 00:14:14,510
Right.
324
00:14:14,720 --> 00:14:17,838
- Right?
- Right.
325
00:14:20,480 --> 00:14:23,040
Right. Good. Strong...
326
00:14:23,200 --> 00:14:26,113
Strong point. I'll give it another look.
Yeah, I mean if you wanna...
327
00:14:26,280 --> 00:14:28,351
You're gonna have to take
the manual out, because I think...
328
00:14:28,520 --> 00:14:29,874
All right, I'm gonna start
from the beginning.
329
00:14:30,040 --> 00:14:31,952
First I'm gonna power on the...
330
00:14:32,720 --> 00:14:34,598
- Was that you?
- No. I thought that was you.
331
00:14:34,760 --> 00:14:35,750
No, I didn't push the button.
332
00:14:35,920 --> 00:14:37,149
- That was you.
- No, that wasn't me.
333
00:14:37,320 --> 00:14:39,118
I'm not pushing the button yet.
334
00:14:39,360 --> 00:14:40,999
Are you sure you're not hitting it
by accident, or...
335
00:14:41,160 --> 00:14:42,276
No.
336
00:14:44,680 --> 00:14:46,592
You know what?
I'm gonna go down to the next step.
337
00:14:46,760 --> 00:14:49,514
Maybe I'll just power on the...
338
00:14:49,960 --> 00:14:52,031
- Farewell, you bastard.
- A-ha!
339
00:14:52,760 --> 00:14:54,479
I think I see what's going on here.
340
00:14:54,640 --> 00:14:58,316
Mr. Strickland, you are
the victim of a senior prank.
341
00:15:00,640 --> 00:15:02,791
Very funny, you guys. Very, very funny.
342
00:15:03,000 --> 00:15:06,516
I believe this young man is manipulating
the television with his cell phone.
343
00:15:06,680 --> 00:15:08,592
Kind of caught him out of
the corner of my eye there.
344
00:15:08,800 --> 00:15:09,836
He's doing this?
345
00:15:10,000 --> 00:15:11,434
- Yeah.
- You doing it?
346
00:15:13,000 --> 00:15:14,229
Give it to me.
347
00:15:15,160 --> 00:15:16,150
Now!
348
00:15:16,320 --> 00:15:17,834
You think this is funny?
349
00:15:18,000 --> 00:15:20,310
Messing with the TV with your
goddamn computer telephone?
350
00:15:20,520 --> 00:15:21,749
No, I'm not the one doing it.
351
00:15:22,160 --> 00:15:23,799
I'mma show you what's funny.
352
00:15:24,480 --> 00:15:25,709
Everybody,
353
00:15:25,880 --> 00:15:29,840
I want you to hashtag L-M-F-A...
354
00:15:30,520 --> 00:15:31,510
O!
355
00:15:31,760 --> 00:15:34,992
Now, there will be no more
interruptions in my class.
356
00:15:35,200 --> 00:15:36,190
None!
357
00:15:36,360 --> 00:15:39,273
We're gonna watch
this beautiful documentary
358
00:15:39,440 --> 00:15:40,954
on the Civil War,
359
00:15:41,120 --> 00:15:43,430
and it's not Tupac versus Biggie.
360
00:15:46,560 --> 00:15:48,677
He lost a leg at Gettysburg
361
00:15:48,880 --> 00:15:50,758
and an arm at Chickamauga.
362
00:15:50,920 --> 00:15:53,151
But his blood thirst remained unquenched.
363
00:15:53,520 --> 00:15:55,079
Okay. Uh...
364
00:15:55,720 --> 00:15:58,030
We got it going,
so I'm gonna go back to class.
365
00:15:58,200 --> 00:15:59,350
Hey, man. Shut up.
366
00:15:59,760 --> 00:16:01,319
I said no interruptions.
367
00:16:01,640 --> 00:16:03,472
Be a fucking example for the kids, man.
368
00:16:05,000 --> 00:16:06,878
It was going to be a long winter.
369
00:16:07,760 --> 00:16:09,160
He had to amputate his son's leg
370
00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:12,239
with nothing but a bayonet
and a box of matches.
371
00:16:13,040 --> 00:16:15,635
Families were increasingly
facing hard decisions.
372
00:16:21,160 --> 00:16:24,676
What the fuck?
373
00:16:34,760 --> 00:16:37,673
Do it.
374
00:16:42,640 --> 00:16:44,154
No!
375
00:16:49,960 --> 00:16:53,158
All right. Who did that?
376
00:16:53,360 --> 00:16:54,555
Who did it?
377
00:16:55,320 --> 00:16:57,437
Who did that?
378
00:16:59,240 --> 00:17:00,310
Who did it?
379
00:17:00,680 --> 00:17:03,639
It was you! It was you, wasn't it?
Give me that phone!
380
00:17:03,800 --> 00:17:06,315
I don't have one.
You just broke mine, remember?
381
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:08,312
Okay. Okay.
382
00:17:08,680 --> 00:17:10,592
God damn it. I'm tired of this shit.
383
00:17:15,440 --> 00:17:17,750
Uh, I don't know what's happening.
384
00:17:17,920 --> 00:17:18,910
Get out of here!
385
00:17:19,120 --> 00:17:21,077
Oh, shit! Okay, I have the phone.
I have the phone.
386
00:17:39,960 --> 00:17:42,520
Remember, teachers stick together.
387
00:17:46,960 --> 00:17:47,996
Yeah.
388
00:17:48,760 --> 00:17:49,796
Okay.
389
00:18:01,000 --> 00:18:03,196
I don't have time for this today.
390
00:18:06,320 --> 00:18:10,633
I've got 30 termination
meetings today alone.
391
00:18:12,160 --> 00:18:16,996
Everything in my office
is glued to something else.
392
00:18:19,520 --> 00:18:23,833
I got drawers filled,
filled with Silly String. You see that?
393
00:18:24,040 --> 00:18:27,033
And I got a goddamn mariachi band
following me around wherever I go!
394
00:18:30,200 --> 00:18:32,510
I offered them $100
and they still won't leave.
395
00:18:32,680 --> 00:18:34,558
I think they thought it was a tip.
396
00:18:34,720 --> 00:18:37,315
And now I've got 20 students
397
00:18:37,480 --> 00:18:39,312
running out of a classroom in a panic.
398
00:18:39,480 --> 00:18:43,190
Students telling me that Neil's desk
has been smashed to pieces,
399
00:18:43,360 --> 00:18:45,352
presumably by a fire ax,
400
00:18:45,560 --> 00:18:48,394
and you're telling me
that you haven't seen anything today?
401
00:18:50,040 --> 00:18:51,269
Yeah.
402
00:18:51,800 --> 00:18:53,951
How about you, Strickland? Huh? Nothing?
403
00:18:54,120 --> 00:18:56,396
Like I said before, Tyler,
404
00:18:57,000 --> 00:18:59,754
I was too busy working out
that piece of shit VCR
405
00:18:59,920 --> 00:19:01,400
that this school is still using.
406
00:19:01,560 --> 00:19:03,916
I know you teachers all like
to stick together. I get it.
407
00:19:04,920 --> 00:19:07,799
But I'm having to fire whole departments.
408
00:19:08,400 --> 00:19:09,629
That's hard on me, too.
409
00:19:10,240 --> 00:19:12,277
Wait, whole departments?
410
00:19:12,440 --> 00:19:14,557
Yeah. Entire departments.
411
00:19:16,240 --> 00:19:17,913
Well, uh, I mean...
412
00:19:18,080 --> 00:19:21,756
Maybe the best thing
to do is talk to Neil?
413
00:19:22,280 --> 00:19:24,920
Oh, I did. Yeah.
Neil's not talkin' either.
414
00:19:25,080 --> 00:19:26,070
So, then I went back to this.
415
00:19:26,240 --> 00:19:28,630
I'm back to needing a straight answer
from one of you two.
416
00:19:30,280 --> 00:19:31,270
Right.
417
00:19:31,480 --> 00:19:33,199
Let me bottom-line this for you.
418
00:19:33,400 --> 00:19:35,198
Someone's going down for this.
419
00:19:35,400 --> 00:19:37,073
I'm firing one of you two today.
420
00:19:43,680 --> 00:19:46,115
Tell you what,
how about we'll go one better.
421
00:19:46,640 --> 00:19:48,313
How about I fire you both?
422
00:19:53,800 --> 00:19:55,154
He did it.
423
00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:58,076
You did it.
424
00:19:58,240 --> 00:19:59,993
I mean, you did do it, so...
425
00:20:00,160 --> 00:20:01,150
He did it.
426
00:20:02,600 --> 00:20:04,432
That's what happened, was you...
427
00:20:04,640 --> 00:20:06,120
'Cause he, you know,
428
00:20:07,800 --> 00:20:08,790
chopped the desk.
429
00:20:08,960 --> 00:20:10,713
Which you probably shouldn't have done.
430
00:20:10,880 --> 00:20:12,917
Did you mean to do it? Was it an accident?
431
00:20:13,080 --> 00:20:14,799
Or did you wanna say it was an accident?
432
00:20:14,960 --> 00:20:16,110
You know what it was?
433
00:20:16,360 --> 00:20:19,353
The technology is outdated on the VCRs.
434
00:20:19,560 --> 00:20:20,550
That was a great point. Yeah.
435
00:20:20,760 --> 00:20:23,116
And the kids were pushing
him with the pranks.
436
00:20:23,320 --> 00:20:24,800
They're out of control this year, sir.
437
00:20:24,960 --> 00:20:26,189
I've never seen anything like it, really.
438
00:20:26,360 --> 00:20:29,637
You know what, I think maybe
you should take that all in consideration.
439
00:20:29,800 --> 00:20:31,439
And maybe just, you know...
440
00:20:32,720 --> 00:20:33,790
Don't fire him.
441
00:20:36,800 --> 00:20:38,757
I am so sorry he fired you.
442
00:20:39,160 --> 00:20:42,153
That's such a shitty situation
he put us in.
443
00:20:42,480 --> 00:20:46,360
And, you know,
I feel somewhat responsible, you know.
444
00:20:46,520 --> 00:20:48,432
I mean, look. Hey, come 2:00 today,
445
00:20:48,640 --> 00:20:51,155
I might not have a job either, but, uh...
446
00:20:51,440 --> 00:20:55,070
You know, I got a baby due any minute,
and I can't be losing my job,
447
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:57,516
so I hope you understand.
448
00:20:59,440 --> 00:21:01,159
I'm gonna fight you.
449
00:21:04,000 --> 00:21:05,070
I'm sorry, what?
450
00:21:05,520 --> 00:21:10,356
I am going to fight you.
451
00:21:12,360 --> 00:21:13,510
Are...
452
00:21:14,280 --> 00:21:15,350
Are you joking?
453
00:21:16,680 --> 00:21:19,878
Look, man, I was in a very
tight spot there, you know.
454
00:21:20,040 --> 00:21:21,952
Tyler really was pitting us
against each other, and...
455
00:21:22,120 --> 00:21:24,919
After school, you gonna
meet me in the parking lot,
456
00:21:25,080 --> 00:21:27,356
and we gonna handle this
shit the primitive way.
457
00:21:28,040 --> 00:21:29,156
With our fists.
458
00:21:30,600 --> 00:21:31,875
You can't be serious.
459
00:21:32,760 --> 00:21:34,991
I can't wait to fuck you up.
460
00:21:36,000 --> 00:21:37,559
Whoa. Hey...
461
00:21:37,720 --> 00:21:39,677
Hey, man, whoa. I...
462
00:21:39,840 --> 00:21:42,878
Look, I'm very sorry you lost your job,
463
00:21:43,040 --> 00:21:44,235
but you're talking crazy.
464
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:45,516
Right? Like...
465
00:21:46,240 --> 00:21:47,435
You hear that that's a...
466
00:21:47,600 --> 00:21:49,353
I don't need this. This is... Mmm-mmm.
467
00:21:52,240 --> 00:21:53,469
Campbell!
468
00:21:57,200 --> 00:22:00,079
Parking lot. After school.
469
00:22:00,240 --> 00:22:01,356
It's on.
470
00:22:03,400 --> 00:22:05,756
Look, man, there's nothing
471
00:22:05,920 --> 00:22:08,116
I could've done, you know? So...
472
00:22:08,280 --> 00:22:11,717
I'm very sorry you lost
your job, but this is over.
473
00:22:11,880 --> 00:22:13,633
One man wins
474
00:22:14,600 --> 00:22:16,557
when the other's unconscious.
475
00:22:16,720 --> 00:22:20,760
Then, and only then, is it over.
476
00:22:21,800 --> 00:22:24,395
You really wanna have
a fist fight after school,
477
00:22:24,560 --> 00:22:28,076
- like we're a couple of students?
- I want everybody to see this.
478
00:22:28,280 --> 00:22:29,475
Teachers don't fight.
479
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,757
We're gonna handle
our differences like real men.
480
00:22:31,960 --> 00:22:32,950
What differences?
481
00:22:33,240 --> 00:22:37,120
You got a job and I don't!
That's the fucking difference.
482
00:22:37,280 --> 00:22:38,396
This is a bad joke.
483
00:22:38,560 --> 00:22:39,994
Snitches get stitches.
484
00:22:40,160 --> 00:22:43,437
Snitches and stitches,
what the fuck you talking about?
485
00:22:48,480 --> 00:22:49,709
I can't even be there!
486
00:22:49,880 --> 00:22:51,951
I have a talent show thing
with my daughter.
487
00:22:53,000 --> 00:22:55,435
It's the last day of school.
Can't we just let this thing go?
488
00:22:57,360 --> 00:22:58,396
Strickland!
489
00:22:59,680 --> 00:23:00,750
Strickland!
490
00:23:02,400 --> 00:23:06,030
It takes courage, uh, to grow up
491
00:23:06,200 --> 00:23:07,190
and, uh...
492
00:23:08,960 --> 00:23:11,794
Make it the whole way.
493
00:23:12,480 --> 00:23:13,630
E.E. Cummings said that.
494
00:23:13,800 --> 00:23:17,840
And words are gonna matter for you guys.
495
00:23:18,080 --> 00:23:20,072
Uh, um...
496
00:23:21,960 --> 00:23:23,155
Yes, Nathaniel.
497
00:23:23,320 --> 00:23:25,391
Is it true you're gonna
fight Mr. Strickland?
498
00:23:26,400 --> 00:23:28,278
Wait. You've heard about this?
499
00:23:28,440 --> 00:23:29,840
What did you hear?
500
00:23:37,320 --> 00:23:41,280
Hashtag teacher fight? What is this?
You guys are tweeting about this now?
501
00:23:41,560 --> 00:23:43,995
Why would you agree to fight Strickland?
He could kill you.
502
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:45,674
Yeah, no, guys.
I'm not gonna fight Mr. Strickland.
503
00:23:45,840 --> 00:23:47,718
We had a misunderstanding,
504
00:23:47,880 --> 00:23:49,678
and everything's gonna be just fine.
505
00:23:49,840 --> 00:23:52,753
I'm... I'm sorry, though.
Who else knows about this?
506
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:56,518
You guys hear Strickland
is gonna fight Campbell?
507
00:23:56,680 --> 00:23:57,716
Yeah, he's gonna whip him bad.
508
00:23:57,880 --> 00:23:59,553
Without a doubt.
509
00:23:59,840 --> 00:24:01,194
What are you guys doing now?
510
00:24:01,640 --> 00:24:04,109
We just chalking the field.
511
00:24:04,600 --> 00:24:07,354
Well, your lines are a little off,
but I appreciate the hard work, kids.
512
00:24:07,520 --> 00:24:11,036
Let me tell you something. Kids your age
sometimes can turn out to be douchebags,
513
00:24:11,200 --> 00:24:12,714
but you guys come from good stock.
514
00:24:12,880 --> 00:24:13,996
Good batch of kids.
515
00:24:15,320 --> 00:24:16,356
Thank you, Coach.
516
00:24:16,520 --> 00:24:18,796
Let's go! Everybody, on the track!
517
00:24:18,960 --> 00:24:21,600
Clifford, stop doggin' it.
I will fuck you up.
518
00:24:26,840 --> 00:24:28,911
What are you doing,
challenging Strickland to a fight?
519
00:24:29,080 --> 00:24:31,549
- I didn't challenge him to a fight.
- This is crazy.
520
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:33,120
Everybody's got a story about him.
521
00:24:33,320 --> 00:24:35,073
Like what? What have you...
What do you know about him?
522
00:24:35,280 --> 00:24:36,270
He used to be in a...
523
00:24:36,480 --> 00:24:38,358
Gang, right. And if anyone snitched,
524
00:24:38,520 --> 00:24:40,716
he's the guy you had to answer to.
525
00:24:40,880 --> 00:24:43,793
Please, man!
526
00:24:44,000 --> 00:24:45,593
I didn't mean to do... Hey...
527
00:24:45,760 --> 00:24:47,956
- Hey, man, don't do it, man.
- Don't do it.
528
00:24:48,360 --> 00:24:50,556
Saddam Hussein had
these two fucked-up evil sons,
529
00:24:50,920 --> 00:24:52,036
mass murderers.
530
00:24:52,200 --> 00:24:54,590
During the Iraq War,
Strickland killed them.
531
00:24:56,280 --> 00:24:58,397
You're dead. You're dead.
532
00:25:00,920 --> 00:25:02,400
Game's over, boys.
533
00:25:02,600 --> 00:25:04,353
I'll save you some next time.
534
00:25:04,920 --> 00:25:06,115
So I'm cleaning late at night,
535
00:25:06,600 --> 00:25:08,990
and I walk in on him playing piano.
536
00:25:13,680 --> 00:25:15,512
The dude's a virtuoso.
537
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:18,393
That doesn't seem too scary.
538
00:25:20,200 --> 00:25:21,759
You didn't see his eyes.
539
00:25:27,520 --> 00:25:28,636
He was a cop,
540
00:25:28,920 --> 00:25:31,196
and whenever anyone
got off on a technicality,
541
00:25:31,360 --> 00:25:34,114
he would find them
and beat the shit out of 'em.
542
00:25:42,320 --> 00:25:44,596
Oh, he's gonna fuckin' kill me.
543
00:25:44,760 --> 00:25:45,796
Nah.
544
00:25:46,840 --> 00:25:47,830
Yeah.
545
00:25:48,040 --> 00:25:49,520
Kill for it!
546
00:25:53,120 --> 00:25:54,110
Guys, this is crazy, right?
547
00:25:54,320 --> 00:25:57,597
I mean, what kind of adult man
challenges another adult man to a fight?
548
00:25:57,760 --> 00:25:58,830
That's not a thing that happens anymore.
549
00:25:59,000 --> 00:26:03,079
Okay. All right. Why don't you just take
a punch and then just go down, you know?
550
00:26:03,240 --> 00:26:06,119
Play dead like you're with
a bear, or like possums do,
551
00:26:06,280 --> 00:26:08,192
or anything that's like a...
Like a pussy animal.
552
00:26:08,360 --> 00:26:11,751
I don't wanna take a punch.
I don't wanna be in a fight.
553
00:26:11,960 --> 00:26:14,111
He's right. He can't be taking no punches.
554
00:26:14,280 --> 00:26:15,270
- Right?
- No.
555
00:26:15,440 --> 00:26:16,590
You see those twins out there?
556
00:26:16,800 --> 00:26:18,314
Oh, yeah. The hot ones?
557
00:26:18,520 --> 00:26:20,477
The one on the left's
been playing games with me all year.
558
00:26:20,680 --> 00:26:21,716
Hey, hey!
559
00:26:22,160 --> 00:26:23,435
Hey, Nathaniel.
560
00:26:24,160 --> 00:26:25,389
Hey, what's up?
561
00:26:27,480 --> 00:26:29,676
He wants to fuck me.
He's just playing games.
562
00:26:29,840 --> 00:26:32,230
Yeah. You know how that story ends,
right? You've seen it on the news?
563
00:26:32,440 --> 00:26:34,079
Oh, with the teachers
who go for the students?
564
00:26:34,280 --> 00:26:35,396
Getting arrested and
going to jail for many...
565
00:26:35,560 --> 00:26:36,550
Yeah.
566
00:26:36,760 --> 00:26:38,080
The news always, like,
leaves out the good part.
567
00:26:38,320 --> 00:26:40,630
They never tell how the
teacher does the seduction.
568
00:26:41,160 --> 00:26:42,799
Right. Never mind.
What's your point with the twins?
569
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:45,191
Watch this shit. Nathaniel!
570
00:26:45,840 --> 00:26:47,672
Give your brother 85%.
571
00:26:48,760 --> 00:26:49,750
Mmm. Mmm-hmm.
572
00:26:50,000 --> 00:26:51,195
Oh, shit!
573
00:26:51,360 --> 00:26:53,113
- Right on the Flintstone.
- That was hot.
574
00:26:53,280 --> 00:26:56,273
At 100%, it's a toss-up
whether the other twin gets back up.
575
00:26:56,480 --> 00:26:59,791
That's not good because Strickland's
definitely gonna punch me at 100%.
576
00:26:59,960 --> 00:27:02,839
Oh, no. He gonna punch you at 110%.
577
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,720
At which point you won't be playing dead.
You will be dead.
578
00:27:05,880 --> 00:27:09,794
All right. Well, 110% is not a real thing
'cause 100 is the max that you can go.
579
00:27:09,960 --> 00:27:11,917
Can I get over here to elaborate with him?
Thank you.
580
00:27:12,080 --> 00:27:16,120
See, he's gonna be aiming for a target
in the center of your skull,
581
00:27:16,320 --> 00:27:19,358
which is gonna compound
the energy as it connects,
582
00:27:19,520 --> 00:27:21,000
which is gonna automatically scramble
583
00:27:21,200 --> 00:27:23,396
all the gray
and white matter in your brain
584
00:27:23,600 --> 00:27:28,550
that controls logic, personality,
social and sexual behavior.
585
00:27:28,800 --> 00:27:30,029
So at 110%?
586
00:27:30,200 --> 00:27:33,716
Oh, he most definitely is gonna
knock all the sex out of you.
587
00:27:34,360 --> 00:27:35,635
Ah, Jesus Christ.
588
00:27:35,840 --> 00:27:38,912
Now, maybe you'll duck and he misses.
589
00:27:39,080 --> 00:27:40,878
But that's a big-ass maybe.
590
00:27:41,040 --> 00:27:42,872
Right, but if he does, I... I'll just run.
591
00:27:43,040 --> 00:27:45,953
No. I never said nothing about no running.
592
00:27:46,120 --> 00:27:47,793
Who's you? Seabiscuit?
593
00:27:50,680 --> 00:27:51,750
That was a great talk.
594
00:27:51,920 --> 00:27:53,479
Like, so super-helpful.
595
00:27:53,640 --> 00:27:54,676
- Both of you, really.
- Yeah.
596
00:27:54,840 --> 00:27:55,910
Super-great.
597
00:27:56,080 --> 00:27:57,833
I'm gonna figure this out some other way.
598
00:27:58,000 --> 00:28:00,071
- Campbell, you know my style.
- Yeah.
599
00:28:00,280 --> 00:28:01,316
I drop it like it's hot,
600
00:28:01,480 --> 00:28:03,676
and then sometimes
I pick it up when it's cold.
601
00:28:05,000 --> 00:28:06,480
- My man.
- All right.
602
00:28:06,640 --> 00:28:08,518
I didn't understand a word of that.
I'll see ya.
603
00:28:28,400 --> 00:28:29,880
No!
604
00:28:30,080 --> 00:28:32,356
No! No!
605
00:28:33,440 --> 00:28:34,430
- Dude, let's go!
- Stop!
606
00:28:34,600 --> 00:28:35,795
Not on my watch!
607
00:28:38,160 --> 00:28:41,790
You guys are not allowed to leave campus.
You need the proper paperwork to leave!
608
00:28:41,960 --> 00:28:43,280
I make more money than you!
609
00:28:43,440 --> 00:28:44,954
- Mehar! Hey.
- Hey.
610
00:28:45,160 --> 00:28:46,355
I need some help with something.
611
00:28:46,520 --> 00:28:47,954
Mr. Strickland was fired today,
612
00:28:48,160 --> 00:28:50,072
and I noticed that his car is still here.
613
00:28:50,480 --> 00:28:53,632
Well, technically, he has until the end
of school day to vacate school grounds.
614
00:28:53,800 --> 00:28:55,473
This is embarrassing.
He's challenged me to a fight.
615
00:28:55,640 --> 00:28:57,836
So I'm in an unsafe situation here.
616
00:28:58,480 --> 00:29:00,676
Oh, that sucks. He's gonna win.
617
00:29:01,080 --> 00:29:02,594
- Flex.
- I'm not gonna flex.
618
00:29:02,800 --> 00:29:04,598
- Flex.
- Fine.
619
00:29:05,080 --> 00:29:06,673
- Flex.
- I am flexing.
620
00:29:07,360 --> 00:29:08,350
There's nothing there.
621
00:29:08,600 --> 00:29:09,670
All right, look, come on. This is...
622
00:29:09,840 --> 00:29:11,240
- This is the problem.
- It is a problem.
623
00:29:11,400 --> 00:29:13,278
Can you get him out of here or what?
624
00:29:13,560 --> 00:29:16,314
Well, if it's going to occur after school,
then it's not really my jurisdiction
625
00:29:16,520 --> 00:29:19,513
because I'm the school security guard
and not the world security guard.
626
00:29:19,680 --> 00:29:20,670
Oh, come on, man...
627
00:29:20,840 --> 00:29:22,877
I don't, like, try and stop
terrorist attacks or...
628
00:29:23,040 --> 00:29:24,394
I'm just asking you to do your job here.
629
00:29:24,560 --> 00:29:27,997
You're asking me to do the job of security
guard after 3:00, when I'm not...
630
00:29:28,200 --> 00:29:30,157
So you're telling me that
there's nothing you can do?
631
00:29:30,520 --> 00:29:31,874
I could do CPR.
632
00:29:32,080 --> 00:29:34,311
I could potentially revive
you after he renders you unconscious.
633
00:29:34,480 --> 00:29:36,949
But again,
only if it's during school hours.
634
00:29:37,120 --> 00:29:38,349
- Yeah. Okay. Look.
- Yeah.
635
00:29:38,520 --> 00:29:39,874
If it's after school hours,
636
00:29:40,040 --> 00:29:43,033
you're just gonna lay there
all night until 7:00 a.m.,
637
00:29:43,200 --> 00:29:44,600
when I'll come and save your life.
638
00:29:45,040 --> 00:29:46,520
Shit. All right.
639
00:29:46,720 --> 00:29:48,473
You cussed. I'm gonna write you up!
640
00:29:48,680 --> 00:29:50,717
Oh, shit, shit, shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit, shit,
641
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:52,109
shit, shit, shit, shit,
shit, shit, shit, shit.
642
00:29:54,280 --> 00:29:55,509
Ronald?
643
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:59,191
I heard you challenged
Mr. Campbell to a fist fight.
644
00:29:59,400 --> 00:30:00,390
Why?
645
00:30:00,560 --> 00:30:02,597
A man's gotta do what a man's gotta do.
646
00:30:02,760 --> 00:30:04,479
Well, I disagree.
647
00:30:06,080 --> 00:30:07,116
Why is that?
648
00:30:07,320 --> 00:30:09,551
Your fist isn't going
to solve the problem.
649
00:30:12,640 --> 00:30:14,393
You need a knife.
650
00:30:19,920 --> 00:30:21,718
This man is a pervert.
651
00:30:21,920 --> 00:30:24,480
Simply punching him is not enough.
652
00:30:26,080 --> 00:30:27,878
You need to cut him
653
00:30:28,440 --> 00:30:30,079
from his forehead
654
00:30:30,840 --> 00:30:33,230
all the way down to his chin.
655
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:35,276
Damn, lady.
656
00:30:36,280 --> 00:30:37,509
I got this.
657
00:30:38,320 --> 00:30:39,515
Very well.
658
00:30:44,800 --> 00:30:46,029
That bitch crazy.
659
00:30:46,520 --> 00:30:49,319
Okay, Neil, so I think
if you talk to Principal Tyler
660
00:30:49,560 --> 00:30:51,199
and just kind of reverse that story,
661
00:30:51,360 --> 00:30:52,874
everything will get worked out.
662
00:30:54,480 --> 00:30:56,517
So you want me to say
I just made the whole thing up?
663
00:30:57,480 --> 00:30:58,596
Yeah.
664
00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:00,714
Why would I do that?
665
00:31:00,960 --> 00:31:03,839
Well, because this is all your fault.
666
00:31:04,000 --> 00:31:05,354
How? You're the one who tattled.
667
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:09,192
I was in a very compromising situation.
You would've done the same exact thing.
668
00:31:09,360 --> 00:31:11,875
I was in the exact same situation
and did the opposite thing.
669
00:31:12,040 --> 00:31:14,670
It's not the same exact situation, Neil,
because you don't have a wife and kids,
670
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:16,394
so you don't know what
the fuck you're talking about.
671
00:31:16,880 --> 00:31:18,234
Listen... I...
672
00:31:18,800 --> 00:31:20,473
Come on, man, you gotta help me out here.
673
00:31:20,640 --> 00:31:23,474
Look, this has been a huge day
for me, Mr. Campbell.
674
00:31:23,640 --> 00:31:25,871
Do you know how many hits we've
got on the newspaper website?
675
00:31:26,040 --> 00:31:28,316
I mean, even kids who go to
Churchill are reading about this.
676
00:31:28,480 --> 00:31:30,949
This is what I'm trying to
fucking avoid here, Neil.
677
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,515
People are going to get hurt.
I'm going to get...
678
00:31:34,800 --> 00:31:35,950
Neil, come on.
679
00:31:36,160 --> 00:31:39,073
Buddy, let's do the right thing here.
All right?
680
00:31:40,960 --> 00:31:42,633
Okay. Fine.
681
00:31:44,760 --> 00:31:46,080
MacBook Pro.
682
00:31:47,880 --> 00:31:49,155
I'm sorry, what?
683
00:31:49,440 --> 00:31:51,716
I'll do it for a MacBook Pro.
684
00:31:55,040 --> 00:31:56,599
Are you trying to blackmail me?
685
00:31:56,760 --> 00:31:58,513
Want me to lie for you or not?
686
00:31:59,680 --> 00:32:02,680
Hey, buddy, let's get one thing straight.
I'm still a teacher at this school, okay?
687
00:32:02,840 --> 00:32:03,830
Are you?
688
00:32:04,000 --> 00:32:05,912
Yes! I could get you in
a lot of trouble, Neil. Okay?
689
00:32:06,080 --> 00:32:08,515
How would you like it if I talked to your
faculty advisor about this?
690
00:32:08,680 --> 00:32:11,115
My faculty advisor's Mr. Strickland.
691
00:32:12,880 --> 00:32:13,996
God damn it.
692
00:32:14,200 --> 00:32:15,839
You know, with the AppleCare, too.
693
00:32:16,000 --> 00:32:16,990
Yeah?
694
00:32:21,000 --> 00:32:22,116
I'll see you later, Mr. Campbell.
695
00:32:22,280 --> 00:32:23,270
Okay.
696
00:32:24,480 --> 00:32:25,596
What a day.
697
00:32:39,560 --> 00:32:40,880
How can I help you?
698
00:32:41,080 --> 00:32:43,072
One MacBook Pro, please.
699
00:32:45,400 --> 00:32:46,516
Okay.
700
00:32:46,840 --> 00:32:48,559
Okie-dokie. Got it.
701
00:32:49,640 --> 00:32:51,040
Andy?
702
00:32:51,960 --> 00:32:53,713
- Hey!
- Hey!
703
00:32:54,040 --> 00:32:55,713
- What?
- I know! What are you...
704
00:32:55,880 --> 00:32:57,360
What is this?
705
00:32:57,520 --> 00:32:59,113
Why are you guys here?
Why aren't you in school?
706
00:32:59,280 --> 00:33:00,873
Oh, I pulled her from P.E.
707
00:33:01,080 --> 00:33:02,594
We had to get a new outfit
for the talent show.
708
00:33:02,760 --> 00:33:04,672
Apparently the old one wasn't good enough.
709
00:33:04,840 --> 00:33:06,718
But, honey, why are you here?
710
00:33:06,920 --> 00:33:08,593
It's 11:30. Shouldn't you be in class?
711
00:33:08,880 --> 00:33:10,075
Is it 11:30?
712
00:33:10,240 --> 00:33:13,392
Yeah, usually I have class now,
but I think...
713
00:33:13,640 --> 00:33:15,438
Uh, yeah, I...
714
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:16,796
Wait.
715
00:33:17,240 --> 00:33:18,640
Did you lose your job?
716
00:33:19,040 --> 00:33:20,030
No. What?
717
00:33:20,240 --> 00:33:21,674
Oh, my God. Oh, my God.
718
00:33:21,840 --> 00:33:23,911
I knew that you wouldn't
stand up to these people. I just knew it.
719
00:33:24,080 --> 00:33:25,196
- I knew it.
- Wait, I'm sorry, what do you mean,
720
00:33:25,440 --> 00:33:26,794
you knew I wouldn't stand up to them?
721
00:33:26,960 --> 00:33:27,950
That came out wrong.
722
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:30,430
What I'm saying is that, you know, sometimes,
you just let people push you around.
723
00:33:30,600 --> 00:33:31,590
- I do?
- It's... Yeah.
724
00:33:31,760 --> 00:33:32,989
- It's just your thing.
- I have a thing?
725
00:33:33,160 --> 00:33:34,674
Well, yeah. You're... You're the nice guy,
726
00:33:34,840 --> 00:33:37,196
and then people are like,
"Hey, I'm gonna stomp on that guy."
727
00:33:37,360 --> 00:33:39,238
You're spinning out, okay?
Everything really is okay.
728
00:33:39,400 --> 00:33:40,516
I don't know why you don't believe me.
729
00:33:40,680 --> 00:33:41,750
Just 'cause you're
acting kinda nervous and...
730
00:33:41,920 --> 00:33:43,195
Well, you caught me off guard!
731
00:33:43,360 --> 00:33:44,555
You're a little shifty, Daddy.
732
00:33:44,960 --> 00:33:46,155
Why are you here, Andy?
733
00:33:46,320 --> 00:33:48,551
Yeah, Daddy, why are you here?
734
00:33:50,400 --> 00:33:51,834
Uh...
735
00:33:52,080 --> 00:33:53,799
Buying your mom a computer.
736
00:33:54,600 --> 00:33:56,193
Stop it right now.
737
00:33:56,360 --> 00:33:57,430
Yeah, it was supposed to be a surprise...
738
00:33:57,600 --> 00:34:00,160
What? Honey, this is a MacBook!
739
00:34:00,320 --> 00:34:01,834
- Pro.
- Pro?
740
00:34:02,000 --> 00:34:03,992
- With AppleCare.
- This is the most expensive one!
741
00:34:04,160 --> 00:34:06,038
It's the most expensive one!
742
00:34:06,200 --> 00:34:08,669
And you insisted on us
getting the cheaper one not too long ago.
743
00:34:08,840 --> 00:34:11,275
- I don't know what I was thinking!
- I don't either.
744
00:34:11,480 --> 00:34:13,472
Because technology's always changing.
You gotta keep up.
745
00:34:13,640 --> 00:34:17,075
Otherwise, you're one of those dumb
families that doesn't have a MacBook Pro.
746
00:34:17,320 --> 00:34:18,310
I ruined the surprise.
747
00:34:18,480 --> 00:34:19,470
Now, let's talk about you.
748
00:34:19,640 --> 00:34:22,838
Why are you changing the song
and wanting to change your outfit?
749
00:34:23,000 --> 00:34:24,480
Tell your daddy.
750
00:34:24,640 --> 00:34:25,994
Remember Trisha?
751
00:34:26,400 --> 00:34:27,390
Yeah, sure.
752
00:34:27,560 --> 00:34:29,597
She's been making fun of me all year.
753
00:34:29,800 --> 00:34:33,675
And now she's saying it's lame
I'm doing a dance from Rent with my dad.
754
00:34:34,200 --> 00:34:37,716
That's not a lame thing.
You know what? Look, Trisha's lame.
755
00:34:38,160 --> 00:34:39,560
No, she's not.
756
00:34:39,760 --> 00:34:41,592
She always wins the talent show.
757
00:34:42,120 --> 00:34:44,316
Maybe you'll win the talent show. Right?
758
00:34:44,480 --> 00:34:46,153
I've been practicing all the moves!
759
00:34:46,320 --> 00:34:48,073
- Oh!
- You know what I mean? I got them down!
760
00:34:48,320 --> 00:34:50,630
I'm not gonna let you down. Right? Okay?
761
00:34:50,800 --> 00:34:51,950
And see, there's the smile I need!
762
00:34:52,120 --> 00:34:54,112
- See, now you're happy and you're happy.
- I am.
763
00:34:54,320 --> 00:34:55,310
Let's get you back to school.
764
00:34:55,480 --> 00:34:56,960
- Okay. Bye, Daddy. I love you.
- I love you, too.
765
00:34:57,120 --> 00:34:59,430
Everybody stop worrying
and panicking, and get going.
766
00:34:59,600 --> 00:35:00,670
- Come on, go!
- Thank you!
767
00:35:00,840 --> 00:35:03,912
A-get, get, get, get, get, get.
768
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:08,830
Hi.
769
00:35:09,160 --> 00:35:10,196
Hey. Back so soon?
770
00:35:10,360 --> 00:35:12,511
- Yeah, I'm gonna need another one.
- Okay.
771
00:35:12,680 --> 00:35:16,117
Oh, and do you mind spreading this
one around a little bit?
772
00:35:16,280 --> 00:35:17,270
Yeah.
773
00:35:18,040 --> 00:35:20,316
Hey, man, did you hear
about this teacher fight?
774
00:35:21,320 --> 00:35:22,800
It's gonna be fuckin' awesome.
775
00:35:23,520 --> 00:35:24,715
Fuck me.
776
00:35:29,040 --> 00:35:30,633
Hey, what is that? Baby oil?
777
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:32,553
Hey, stop... Stop that.
778
00:35:33,080 --> 00:35:34,070
Hey!
779
00:35:36,400 --> 00:35:40,713
Twenty-two years of this
motherfucking high school!
780
00:35:40,880 --> 00:35:44,556
So, uh, the truth is,
I was mad at Mr. Strickland
781
00:35:44,720 --> 00:35:48,839
because he'd given me
a bad, but fair grade
782
00:35:49,040 --> 00:35:50,235
- on my last test.
- Yeah.
783
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:53,074
And, you know, he never
lashed out at me or anything like that.
784
00:35:53,240 --> 00:35:54,230
No.
785
00:35:54,400 --> 00:35:58,110
And my desk broke because
I was leaning on it.
786
00:35:58,280 --> 00:36:00,875
You leaned on it,
and then you blamed the teacher.
787
00:36:01,040 --> 00:36:02,076
Unbelievable.
788
00:36:02,240 --> 00:36:03,640
- Yeah.
- Unbelievable.
789
00:36:03,800 --> 00:36:06,952
And Mr. Strickland got in a
lot of trouble because of you.
790
00:36:07,160 --> 00:36:08,150
Whew!
791
00:36:09,600 --> 00:36:13,116
You know this completely contradicts
your statement, right, Campbell?
792
00:36:13,760 --> 00:36:15,911
Look, we can get caught up
in the whole statement game.
793
00:36:16,080 --> 00:36:19,073
Who said what and what they
meant by what they said,
794
00:36:19,280 --> 00:36:21,749
and what words mean when people say them,
795
00:36:21,920 --> 00:36:24,913
and, you know, who's making
a statement and what the statement means,
796
00:36:25,120 --> 00:36:28,716
and whose statement has something to do
with something that someone else says.
797
00:36:28,880 --> 00:36:30,678
And, see, statements get...
798
00:36:30,840 --> 00:36:32,240
You know? And then...
799
00:36:32,400 --> 00:36:34,119
You said he chopped it with a fucking ax.
800
00:36:34,280 --> 00:36:35,794
Yeah, I know I said
the chopping thing, didn't I?
801
00:36:36,000 --> 00:36:37,400
Yeah. But you know what?
802
00:36:37,560 --> 00:36:39,119
I was looking at the AV system,
803
00:36:39,280 --> 00:36:40,919
and I heard the crash
and, you know, I did...
804
00:36:41,080 --> 00:36:43,720
You know how when you do one of
these and you're like, "Oh, my God."
805
00:36:43,880 --> 00:36:46,270
And then your hands are
flying in front of your face,
806
00:36:46,440 --> 00:36:48,955
and, like, that can look like chopping.
807
00:36:49,320 --> 00:36:51,676
But you were right there.
He had the best view
808
00:36:51,840 --> 00:36:52,876
- of his own seat.
- Yeah.
809
00:36:53,040 --> 00:36:56,795
So, forget my statement
'cause I wasn't in the right...
810
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:58,440
- It was chaotic.
- It was chaotic. Yeah.
811
00:36:58,600 --> 00:37:03,311
And shame on you because we have been
through an ordeal over all of this.
812
00:37:03,480 --> 00:37:06,154
You should have
come out and said that in the first place.
813
00:37:06,320 --> 00:37:07,310
- So...
- He's right.
814
00:37:07,520 --> 00:37:09,637
Yeah, so there you have it.
815
00:37:17,480 --> 00:37:20,075
All right, I guess
if that's your statement,
816
00:37:20,240 --> 00:37:21,469
we got no issue with Strickland.
817
00:37:21,640 --> 00:37:24,280
I'll tell him he can keep his job for now.
818
00:37:24,440 --> 00:37:26,159
Oh!
819
00:37:26,440 --> 00:37:28,671
Sir, thank you so much.
That is fantastic news.
820
00:37:28,840 --> 00:37:30,160
I wouldn't get too happy, Campbell.
821
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:33,280
Because you're still under review, and
you put me through a lot of shit today.
822
00:37:34,480 --> 00:37:35,516
Okay. Yeah, okay.
823
00:37:35,680 --> 00:37:36,875
Now, here's my statement.
824
00:37:37,040 --> 00:37:38,872
Get the fuck out of my office
and don't come back today.
825
00:37:39,040 --> 00:37:41,794
Okay, yeah. Let's get out
of here on these terms.
826
00:37:41,960 --> 00:37:43,474
Thank you again, for the...
827
00:37:46,800 --> 00:37:48,393
Are you kidding me?
828
00:37:50,360 --> 00:37:51,350
- Hey!
- Hey.
829
00:37:51,520 --> 00:37:53,432
Hi. Oh, my God. How you feeling?
830
00:37:53,600 --> 00:37:55,398
Please tell me it's not a student.
Is it a student?
831
00:37:55,560 --> 00:37:56,789
No. I'm not actually pregnant.
832
00:37:57,480 --> 00:37:59,312
No, I would never sleep with a student.
833
00:37:59,760 --> 00:38:01,194
- Good.
- Without protection.
834
00:38:02,000 --> 00:38:05,198
By the way, did that twin
say anything to you about me?
835
00:38:05,560 --> 00:38:07,358
No. He doesn't talk to me
about you at all.
836
00:38:07,520 --> 00:38:08,556
- Yeah.
- Okay.
837
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:10,717
You know why? He's dating a cheerleader.
838
00:38:11,680 --> 00:38:13,000
Games.
839
00:38:13,160 --> 00:38:14,879
I think it's because you're
20 years older than him.
840
00:38:15,040 --> 00:38:18,078
But in bed,
it's like numbers don't matter.
841
00:38:18,320 --> 00:38:19,640
Except for the number of pumps.
842
00:38:19,800 --> 00:38:21,837
What? I'm sorry. You count pumps?
843
00:38:22,040 --> 00:38:23,440
I like stats.
844
00:38:23,720 --> 00:38:24,836
That's crazy.
845
00:38:25,240 --> 00:38:27,038
Hmm. Isn't it weird, though?
846
00:38:27,240 --> 00:38:28,959
- How, like, we're at work...
- Yeah.
847
00:38:29,160 --> 00:38:30,594
We're just, like,
seeing these kids grow up
848
00:38:30,760 --> 00:38:34,037
and then one day it's just like, bam,
they're 18 and you can fuck 'em.
849
00:38:35,240 --> 00:38:36,230
No.
850
00:38:36,400 --> 00:38:38,676
- How that's just, like, a thing?
- It's really not a thing.
851
00:38:38,840 --> 00:38:41,036
Or how they're like, "Slow down!
852
00:38:41,200 --> 00:38:42,190
"Don't run in the hallways."
853
00:38:42,360 --> 00:38:44,238
- Yeah.
- And then you're like,
854
00:38:44,520 --> 00:38:46,239
- "Do you have a condom?"
- Creeping on them and trying to...
855
00:38:46,400 --> 00:38:48,756
I want that teenage dick, you know?
I want that teenis.
856
00:38:48,920 --> 00:38:50,559
Holly, why are you texting me
that you're pregnant?
857
00:38:50,760 --> 00:38:51,750
I... I gotta be in class.
858
00:38:51,920 --> 00:38:55,357
Can you just wait one second?
'Cause it's all gonna make sense.
859
00:38:55,880 --> 00:38:57,280
- What's going on?
- Here we go.
860
00:38:57,480 --> 00:38:58,470
- Who raped you?
- No, no, no.
861
00:38:58,640 --> 00:38:59,630
Campbell, did you rape this woman?
862
00:38:59,840 --> 00:39:00,830
Whoa, whoa! What?
863
00:39:01,000 --> 00:39:02,992
I 911 texted him. There's been no rape.
864
00:39:03,360 --> 00:39:04,430
Thank you for your bravery.
865
00:39:04,600 --> 00:39:05,590
Well, what's going on?
866
00:39:05,760 --> 00:39:07,240
What the fuck is going on?
That's a great question.
867
00:39:07,400 --> 00:39:11,553
Okay, I'm sorry for misleading you both,
but this is a mediation.
868
00:39:12,120 --> 00:39:13,270
Said that like American Idol.
869
00:39:13,440 --> 00:39:14,430
- A mediation?
- Yeah.
870
00:39:14,600 --> 00:39:16,273
No. Doesn't matter. Don't need it, okay?
871
00:39:16,520 --> 00:39:19,479
Because I... I got you your job back.
872
00:39:20,600 --> 00:39:21,954
You did what?
873
00:39:22,440 --> 00:39:25,433
Yeah. I talked to Principal Tyler
and we worked it out.
874
00:39:25,600 --> 00:39:28,638
So, your job is safe, and...
And we're all good here now.
875
00:39:30,000 --> 00:39:32,390
You should've talked to me
before you did that.
876
00:39:34,680 --> 00:39:35,716
Oh. Uh...
877
00:39:36,120 --> 00:39:38,077
Okay. Sorry about that.
I didn't realize you felt that way,
878
00:39:38,240 --> 00:39:40,038
but look, hey,
consider it a nice surprise.
879
00:39:40,200 --> 00:39:41,236
So, we're good.
880
00:39:41,440 --> 00:39:42,760
You're such a little coward.
881
00:39:42,920 --> 00:39:44,240
Yeah, you are a pussy.
882
00:39:44,440 --> 00:39:46,796
You can't even ask a man
a simple question.
883
00:39:47,600 --> 00:39:48,716
Hey, I thought you'd be happy.
884
00:39:48,880 --> 00:39:49,870
Ask the man a question.
885
00:39:50,040 --> 00:39:51,030
Yeah, I could put it in question form.
886
00:39:51,240 --> 00:39:52,959
- Do you want your job back?
- No!
887
00:39:53,720 --> 00:39:55,916
I'm done with this place,
and I woulda told you that
888
00:39:56,120 --> 00:39:58,351
if you weren't
in my goddamn business again.
889
00:39:58,600 --> 00:40:00,000
Let's watch out for gun fingers.
890
00:40:00,160 --> 00:40:01,230
I'm confused on one thing here.
891
00:40:01,800 --> 00:40:02,790
You don't want your job?
892
00:40:03,000 --> 00:40:03,990
No.
893
00:40:06,880 --> 00:40:09,839
Then why the fuck are you trying to
pick a fight with me, man?
894
00:40:10,000 --> 00:40:12,834
And why did I just spend thousands of
dollars buying two MacBook Pros?
895
00:40:13,000 --> 00:40:15,515
I don't know why you do half
the shit you do, Campbell.
896
00:40:15,720 --> 00:40:17,074
Okay, we're yelling too much!
897
00:40:17,240 --> 00:40:18,515
We're yelling at each other too much.
898
00:40:18,680 --> 00:40:19,670
Yeah. No shit!
899
00:40:19,840 --> 00:40:21,672
It's not going well right now, you guys.
900
00:40:21,840 --> 00:40:23,115
- It's not going well at all.
- No.
901
00:40:23,280 --> 00:40:26,273
This is why I'm here, okay?
I'm a guidance counselor.
902
00:40:26,480 --> 00:40:27,709
So use me! All right?
903
00:40:27,960 --> 00:40:29,110
Let's take a seat.
904
00:40:29,320 --> 00:40:31,676
- Are we walking towards the seats?
- He doesn't want the...
905
00:40:31,840 --> 00:40:34,071
Yeah, but if you don't want the job,
what is the...
906
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,670
Kill the motherfucker today.
I swear to God.
907
00:40:37,920 --> 00:40:39,434
Okay, so right off the bat,
908
00:40:39,600 --> 00:40:42,798
I'm noticing that Campbell,
you're sitting at Israel.
909
00:40:43,360 --> 00:40:45,397
And Strickland, you've chosen Iran.
910
00:40:45,680 --> 00:40:48,957
Okay, I'm wondering
if that's maybe sending a hostile message.
911
00:40:49,120 --> 00:40:51,351
You know, if we can get you
to an ally country, you know,
912
00:40:51,520 --> 00:40:54,877
Italy or Spain or France.
913
00:40:55,040 --> 00:40:56,269
North Korea.
914
00:40:57,080 --> 00:40:58,833
That's a choice. Yeah, yeah, yeah.
915
00:40:59,320 --> 00:41:01,198
Campbell, do you wanna find an ally?
916
00:41:01,360 --> 00:41:02,589
Holly, I'm gonna move past this.
917
00:41:02,760 --> 00:41:06,640
Okay? Look... I'm sorry you don't want
your job back, but I did my part.
918
00:41:06,800 --> 00:41:08,154
I made things right, okay?
919
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:09,880
So, the fight is off.
920
00:41:10,280 --> 00:41:12,590
Okay, Campbell feels that
the fight should be off.
921
00:41:12,760 --> 00:41:13,796
Strickland, how do you feel?
922
00:41:13,960 --> 00:41:16,350
- No, the fight is still on.
- Strickland feels the fight is still on.
923
00:41:16,520 --> 00:41:18,034
Yeah, no shit!
I can hear the man speaking.
924
00:41:18,240 --> 00:41:19,879
- All right.
- Look, why?
925
00:41:20,480 --> 00:41:22,870
Because actions have consequences,
926
00:41:23,080 --> 00:41:25,800
and everybody around here
seem to forget about that.
927
00:41:26,400 --> 00:41:29,438
These students,
they shit on this school all day
928
00:41:29,760 --> 00:41:31,797
and don't nobody do nothing.
929
00:41:32,520 --> 00:41:35,558
Little kids, they come in last place,
930
00:41:35,760 --> 00:41:38,514
and pussies like you,
you wanna give 'em a trophy.
931
00:41:39,680 --> 00:41:41,239
I say fuck a trophy.
932
00:41:42,400 --> 00:41:44,756
Nobody's being held accountable anymore.
933
00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:46,593
So, I'mma hold you accountable.
934
00:41:47,680 --> 00:41:51,594
Yeah, you ratted on me.
Now you got to pay the price.
935
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:57,358
I'mma kick yo' ass at the end of the day
in front of everybody.
936
00:41:58,480 --> 00:42:01,439
And you can consider this my final lesson.
937
00:42:06,760 --> 00:42:08,877
Yeah, you guys should fucking fight.
938
00:42:09,040 --> 00:42:10,997
This is crazy, you know?
939
00:42:11,160 --> 00:42:14,039
Do you hear yourself?
I mean, you've become unhinged!
940
00:42:15,360 --> 00:42:16,714
Maybe.
941
00:42:16,880 --> 00:42:18,553
But let me tell you something.
942
00:42:19,320 --> 00:42:21,630
You don't show up
to that fight this afternoon,
943
00:42:22,480 --> 00:42:26,076
an unhinged man might wanna
do something real nasty to you.
944
00:42:26,240 --> 00:42:27,959
An unhinged man might show up
945
00:42:28,120 --> 00:42:30,680
at your house with
a year's supply of duct tape.
946
00:42:30,840 --> 00:42:32,479
Pop out the bushes.
947
00:42:32,640 --> 00:42:34,916
Gut your ass like a fish.
948
00:42:36,680 --> 00:42:39,639
I could take my revenge anytime, anywhere.
949
00:42:43,960 --> 00:42:45,633
See you after school.
950
00:42:48,640 --> 00:42:49,994
Booty kick!
951
00:42:55,760 --> 00:42:56,876
Nine-one-one. What's your emergency?
952
00:42:57,040 --> 00:42:58,918
Yes, hi.
There's a crazy guy at my high school.
953
00:42:59,080 --> 00:43:00,070
He's trying to beat me up.
954
00:43:00,240 --> 00:43:01,879
Nine-one-one is for emergencies only.
955
00:43:02,040 --> 00:43:04,549
If you have a problem with a bully,
I need you to speak to a teacher.
956
00:43:04,720 --> 00:43:06,791
No... I am a teacher.
957
00:43:07,680 --> 00:43:08,670
Excuse me?
958
00:43:08,840 --> 00:43:12,752
It's actually another teacher
who's gonna beat me up after school,
959
00:43:12,920 --> 00:43:14,149
- so that's why I'm calling.
- I'm sorry,
960
00:43:14,360 --> 00:43:16,113
can you repeat what you just told me?
961
00:43:16,320 --> 00:43:17,356
Okay.
962
00:43:17,520 --> 00:43:20,797
My name is Andrew Campbell.
I'm a teacher at Roosevelt High School.
963
00:43:20,960 --> 00:43:22,314
There's another teacher here
964
00:43:22,480 --> 00:43:24,676
who wants to have
a fist fight with me after school.
965
00:43:24,840 --> 00:43:26,513
So, I need help.
966
00:43:29,680 --> 00:43:32,639
Oh, very funny! Assault is a real thing.
967
00:43:34,080 --> 00:43:36,834
I would like you to stop
laughing and listen to my...
968
00:43:37,000 --> 00:43:39,356
You're a grown man.
Now go on and take that ass-whoopin'.
969
00:43:39,520 --> 00:43:41,113
I'm asking you for help and...
970
00:43:48,120 --> 00:43:50,112
Fuck!
971
00:44:00,640 --> 00:44:02,233
It takes courage...
972
00:44:02,840 --> 00:44:04,399
To become...
973
00:44:05,880 --> 00:44:08,236
People when you're older.
974
00:44:09,360 --> 00:44:12,319
And words are...
975
00:44:14,360 --> 00:44:15,953
Use... Useless.
976
00:44:16,360 --> 00:44:17,589
Apparently.
977
00:44:17,880 --> 00:44:18,870
Uh...
978
00:44:20,280 --> 00:44:23,591
Guys, you know,
look, you try to be a nice guy, right?
979
00:44:23,800 --> 00:44:26,759
And treat everyone with respect,
but you don't get it.
980
00:44:26,920 --> 00:44:28,070
You don't get it back in return.
981
00:44:28,240 --> 00:44:30,755
You know why?
'Cause nice guys, they finish last.
982
00:44:30,920 --> 00:44:31,910
Yeah.
983
00:44:32,080 --> 00:44:35,118
Everything is fucked up.
This is a fucked up school,
984
00:44:35,360 --> 00:44:38,000
filled with lunatic teachers!
985
00:44:39,440 --> 00:44:41,477
Your teachers are fucking nuts!
986
00:44:41,640 --> 00:44:43,074
Man, this is fucked up.
987
00:44:43,280 --> 00:44:44,316
He's having a breakdown.
988
00:44:44,520 --> 00:44:45,670
- We can't prank him.
- Shh!
989
00:44:45,840 --> 00:44:49,470
And you're gonna say,
"Hey, I'm a nice guy. I'm doing okay."
990
00:44:49,640 --> 00:44:52,474
And the world is gonna
unzip its pants, pull them down,
991
00:44:52,640 --> 00:44:55,758
and take a giant fucking shit
all over you guys.
992
00:44:56,440 --> 00:44:57,954
I just can't win, guys!
993
00:44:58,120 --> 00:44:59,315
I cannot win.
994
00:44:59,480 --> 00:45:00,630
Why is there rope around my feet?
995
00:45:10,560 --> 00:45:13,917
Motherfucking little
motherfucking sons of bitches!
996
00:45:14,680 --> 00:45:16,160
This ain't right.
997
00:45:16,320 --> 00:45:18,471
Playing pranks used to be fun.
998
00:45:18,640 --> 00:45:20,871
This shit is getting violent.
999
00:45:21,040 --> 00:45:23,430
I look like a fucking minion!
1000
00:45:23,600 --> 00:45:25,478
Holy cow! They got both of you, huh?
1001
00:45:25,640 --> 00:45:26,676
Man, I gotta get pranked.
1002
00:45:26,840 --> 00:45:27,830
All right, you know what?
1003
00:45:28,000 --> 00:45:29,719
I'm fucking done with this shit.
1004
00:45:29,880 --> 00:45:31,633
Yeah. I really am.
1005
00:45:31,800 --> 00:45:34,190
No more Mr. Nice Guy, right?
1006
00:45:34,360 --> 00:45:37,751
No more playing by the rules
like a stupid little bitch,
1007
00:45:37,960 --> 00:45:40,992
who didn't realize everyone else in the
school threw the rulebook out years ago.
1008
00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:42,390
All right?
1009
00:45:42,560 --> 00:45:44,995
Strickland wants to fuck with me,
and the kids want to fuck with me.
1010
00:45:45,160 --> 00:45:46,594
Everyone wants to fuck with me.
Guess what though?
1011
00:45:46,800 --> 00:45:48,154
Campbell's gonna fuck right back.
1012
00:45:48,320 --> 00:45:49,515
Yeah, let's get laid.
1013
00:45:50,120 --> 00:45:51,554
I'm trying to...
1014
00:45:51,720 --> 00:45:53,677
I'm trying to explain that I'm gonna...
1015
00:45:53,840 --> 00:45:55,240
Holly, shut up!
1016
00:45:55,920 --> 00:45:57,513
Shut the fuck up! You're always...
1017
00:46:01,160 --> 00:46:02,389
I'm sorry.
1018
00:46:03,720 --> 00:46:04,790
I lashed out.
1019
00:46:05,160 --> 00:46:06,355
This has not been a good day.
1020
00:46:06,760 --> 00:46:07,989
So here's what I'm gonna do.
1021
00:46:09,280 --> 00:46:11,397
I'm gonna frame Strickland
for a crime he didn't commit.
1022
00:46:11,560 --> 00:46:13,791
Wait. What? You're gonna do what?
1023
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:15,673
Something occurred to me
as I was getting dragged down
1024
00:46:15,840 --> 00:46:17,433
a flight of stairs by a horse on meth.
1025
00:46:18,280 --> 00:46:21,034
I get some meth, right?
I stick it in his classroom or some shit.
1026
00:46:21,200 --> 00:46:23,476
I tip off the cops, they show up,
1027
00:46:23,640 --> 00:46:25,040
and then boom! They arrest him.
1028
00:46:25,200 --> 00:46:26,520
And I'm not gonna be in a fight today.
1029
00:46:26,720 --> 00:46:28,518
Hey! Maybe I won't be in a fight ever
1030
00:46:28,720 --> 00:46:30,632
'cause I don't know what kinda
past record this guy has.
1031
00:46:30,800 --> 00:46:33,918
Yes. Yes, I fucking love this plan.
Let's do it! Yes!
1032
00:46:34,080 --> 00:46:36,072
Okay. Right? See? Good! Holly's with me.
1033
00:46:36,280 --> 00:46:38,920
I wouldn't tangle with no police.
I'm from the streets.
1034
00:46:39,080 --> 00:46:41,231
You do not go to no cops, okay?
1035
00:46:41,440 --> 00:46:45,593
You might have to just man up
and throw down with this dude.
1036
00:46:46,000 --> 00:46:48,390
Come on, Coach. I can't fight him.
You said it yourself.
1037
00:46:48,560 --> 00:46:49,960
I don't know, Campbell.
1038
00:46:50,160 --> 00:46:52,550
I don't know. Maybe I was wrong.
1039
00:46:52,720 --> 00:46:56,111
You're so pissed off right now,
you might even win.
1040
00:46:56,880 --> 00:46:58,712
You really think I could win?
1041
00:46:58,920 --> 00:47:00,320
Tell you something.
1042
00:47:00,480 --> 00:47:02,073
All it takes is one punch.
1043
00:47:02,240 --> 00:47:04,630
All right. I just... I just don't know
the first thing about fighting.
1044
00:47:05,560 --> 00:47:07,040
Make a fist.
1045
00:47:07,320 --> 00:47:09,198
- Come on! Make a fist!
- Okay. Okay. Okay.
1046
00:47:14,680 --> 00:47:15,955
- Are you serious?
- Yeah.
1047
00:47:16,120 --> 00:47:17,713
This the fucking 1700s?
1048
00:47:17,880 --> 00:47:19,280
I don't know! I...
1049
00:47:19,480 --> 00:47:20,470
Get your fists up.
1050
00:47:20,680 --> 00:47:23,593
Protect yourself before
you get punched in the head!
1051
00:47:23,800 --> 00:47:25,200
All right. Like how? Show me how!
1052
00:47:27,080 --> 00:47:28,070
- Fuck!
- What?
1053
00:47:28,280 --> 00:47:29,270
What the fuck was that?
1054
00:47:29,440 --> 00:47:31,079
Was that too hard? 'Cause it felt awesome.
1055
00:47:31,280 --> 00:47:32,919
Punched me right in my fucking ear.
1056
00:47:33,120 --> 00:47:35,794
- Ah! Shit! Why did you do that?
- 'Cause you said, "Like how?"
1057
00:47:35,960 --> 00:47:37,394
When he was talking about
getting hit in the head.
1058
00:47:37,560 --> 00:47:38,880
I meant, "Like how do I make a fist?"
1059
00:47:39,080 --> 00:47:40,833
Not, "Like how do I get
punched in the fucking head?"
1060
00:47:41,040 --> 00:47:42,110
- Oh, Jesus Christ!
- Got it.
1061
00:47:42,280 --> 00:47:44,590
That makes sense.
I wasn't listening to the conversation.
1062
00:47:44,760 --> 00:47:46,831
- Yeah! No shit!
- I kind of zoned out. I was bored.
1063
00:47:47,000 --> 00:47:48,992
God damn it.
Well, obviously I can't fight this guy.
1064
00:47:49,160 --> 00:47:50,150
No.
1065
00:47:50,720 --> 00:47:51,870
So, back to the meth idea?
1066
00:47:52,040 --> 00:47:53,918
- Yeah, I think that's a good idea.
- Best shot you got.
1067
00:47:54,080 --> 00:47:55,434
- That's all I got, right?
- Yeah.
1068
00:47:55,640 --> 00:47:57,359
Okay, so, Holly, give me some meth.
1069
00:47:58,200 --> 00:48:00,590
Me? Yeah, no. I don't have drugs.
1070
00:48:00,880 --> 00:48:01,870
I thought you said you did.
1071
00:48:02,040 --> 00:48:03,793
No, I don't do drugs at school.
1072
00:48:03,960 --> 00:48:06,236
I do them before I come to school.
1073
00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:09,000
Shit. All right.
Well, where am I gonna get drugs?
1074
00:48:09,960 --> 00:48:14,159
Campbell, this is a public high school
in the United States of America.
1075
00:48:14,320 --> 00:48:17,358
There literally could not be
a better place to buy drugs.
1076
00:48:21,120 --> 00:48:22,315
Yes, hi. There's a crazy guy
1077
00:48:22,480 --> 00:48:23,994
- at my high school.
- Hey. I need your help.
1078
00:48:24,160 --> 00:48:26,755
- What's up?
- Nine-one-one is for emergencies only.
1079
00:48:26,960 --> 00:48:28,872
- What the fuck is this?
- It's my new MacBook Pro.
1080
00:48:29,040 --> 00:48:30,315
My name is Andrew Campbell.
1081
00:48:30,480 --> 00:48:31,709
Andrew Campbell. Andrew Campbell.
1082
00:48:31,880 --> 00:48:33,109
Is that my 911 call?
1083
00:48:33,280 --> 00:48:35,317
This kid in Taiwan
made a YouTube video about it.
1084
00:48:35,480 --> 00:48:36,630
It's so awesome!
1085
00:48:36,800 --> 00:48:38,120
How the fuck did it get to Taiwan?
1086
00:48:38,480 --> 00:48:40,676
Well, I don't sound like...
1087
00:48:40,840 --> 00:48:42,160
How many hits has it got?
1088
00:48:42,320 --> 00:48:44,073
- Now go and take that ass-whooping.
- Jesus Christ!
1089
00:48:44,240 --> 00:48:46,038
All right, look.
Listen to me. Listen to me.
1090
00:48:47,480 --> 00:48:49,073
I need you to sell me some drugs, okay?
1091
00:48:49,680 --> 00:48:51,000
Sorry, I don't know anything about that.
1092
00:48:51,160 --> 00:48:53,231
Cut the shit, all right?
Holly told me that you deal.
1093
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,710
So, let's just... You can deal with me.
1094
00:48:55,880 --> 00:48:58,554
We'll do a drug deal.
1095
00:49:01,000 --> 00:49:02,150
iPhone.
1096
00:49:06,080 --> 00:49:07,196
I'm sorry, what?
1097
00:49:07,400 --> 00:49:10,791
Look, maybe I deal, maybe I don't.
1098
00:49:11,200 --> 00:49:12,714
I'll tell you for a new iPhone.
1099
00:49:13,120 --> 00:49:14,349
Listen, to me you little fucking shit.
1100
00:49:14,520 --> 00:49:17,234
I will take that iPhone, I will shove it
right up your fucking ass, okay?
1101
00:49:17,400 --> 00:49:18,993
Stop...
1102
00:49:19,200 --> 00:49:21,032
- Chill, dude.
- Yeah, yeah. You chill.
1103
00:49:21,200 --> 00:49:22,190
Okay. Look, look, look.
1104
00:49:22,360 --> 00:49:24,352
Be a good boy. Sell me some drugs.
1105
00:49:24,560 --> 00:49:25,994
Okay. Just relax.
1106
00:49:26,880 --> 00:49:27,870
What do you want?
1107
00:49:28,240 --> 00:49:29,356
I don't know. Give me some...
1108
00:49:29,520 --> 00:49:31,273
Give me some meth or something.
1109
00:49:31,640 --> 00:49:32,994
Well, I just sell molly.
1110
00:49:34,960 --> 00:49:36,997
Then why are you asking me
what do I want, Neil?
1111
00:49:37,200 --> 00:49:38,190
I don't know.
1112
00:49:38,360 --> 00:49:40,750
Okay, Neil. Sell me an eighth
of Molly or whatever it is.
1113
00:49:40,920 --> 00:49:42,718
Do you even know what molly is?
1114
00:49:42,880 --> 00:49:44,758
I will rip your head off of your neck.
1115
00:49:45,720 --> 00:49:48,110
I will shit down your throat, okay?
1116
00:49:49,080 --> 00:49:50,275
That... That's where I am right now.
1117
00:49:50,440 --> 00:49:51,920
I'm a broken man, Neil.
1118
00:49:52,560 --> 00:49:53,550
Hmm. Okay?
1119
00:49:53,760 --> 00:49:55,240
- Okay, man.
- Yeah? Okay?
1120
00:49:58,960 --> 00:50:00,280
Right here? Just like this? Jesus Christ.
1121
00:50:00,440 --> 00:50:02,432
All right, give it to me. All right.
1122
00:50:03,200 --> 00:50:04,350
Give me the money.
1123
00:50:05,800 --> 00:50:07,120
Fuck you.
1124
00:50:33,600 --> 00:50:34,636
Hello.
1125
00:50:45,960 --> 00:50:46,950
Yikes.
1126
00:50:58,120 --> 00:50:59,156
What the fuck is this?
1127
00:51:00,640 --> 00:51:01,790
It's my goddamn car!
1128
00:51:01,960 --> 00:51:04,600
Oh, shit! Fuck me. God damn!
1129
00:51:07,200 --> 00:51:08,190
Why are you kicking it?
1130
00:51:08,360 --> 00:51:10,158
I can't... I can't believe
what they did to your car!
1131
00:51:10,320 --> 00:51:12,073
- Fucking monsters.
- Yeah. Fucking animals.
1132
00:51:12,240 --> 00:51:15,153
- Fucking animals.
- Yeah, little... Little... Little animals!
1133
00:51:16,600 --> 00:51:18,557
Right. Listen. Since I ran into you,
1134
00:51:18,760 --> 00:51:21,912
I have to tell you,
we moved your interview back to 2:15.
1135
00:51:22,200 --> 00:51:25,318
I actually have to go to
my daughter's elementary school
1136
00:51:25,480 --> 00:51:29,360
to do a talent show
dance thing with her by 2:30.
1137
00:51:29,560 --> 00:51:32,029
So you want me to accommodate
the fact that you're gonna
1138
00:51:32,200 --> 00:51:35,637
skip out of campus in
the middle of the fucking day.
1139
00:51:36,160 --> 00:51:38,117
Good point. Sorry, sir. Yeah.
1140
00:51:38,320 --> 00:51:39,754
I'll make it work.
1141
00:51:39,920 --> 00:51:41,832
Good. And could you take
your foot off my car?
1142
00:51:42,000 --> 00:51:44,231
Yeah, right.
So, I'll be there for the appointment.
1143
00:51:44,400 --> 00:51:45,390
I'll keep my foot on the car.
1144
00:51:45,560 --> 00:51:46,550
No. Move your foot off my car.
1145
00:51:46,720 --> 00:51:47,870
Can't do it.
1146
00:51:48,080 --> 00:51:49,070
Get your foot off my fucking car!
1147
00:51:49,280 --> 00:51:51,351
If I take my foot off,
then the kids win, sir!
1148
00:51:51,520 --> 00:51:52,556
The kids don't give two shits.
1149
00:51:52,720 --> 00:51:53,756
Get your foot off my fucking car.
1150
00:51:53,960 --> 00:51:55,110
My car's already fucked up!
1151
00:51:55,280 --> 00:51:56,839
But we have to put
our foot down on the car, sir.
1152
00:51:57,000 --> 00:51:57,990
- Off my car!
- Okay, okay!
1153
00:51:58,160 --> 00:52:00,277
What the fuck!
Get your God damn foot off my car!
1154
00:52:00,440 --> 00:52:02,318
Yes, sir. The foot's coming off right now.
1155
00:52:02,480 --> 00:52:03,880
But before it comes off,
1156
00:52:04,880 --> 00:52:07,790
let me just explain myself here.
1157
00:52:08,280 --> 00:52:09,873
A very important announcement.
1158
00:52:10,120 --> 00:52:13,400
If anyone finds a two-inch penis,
please return it to Principal Tyler.
1159
00:52:13,680 --> 00:52:14,670
It's his.
1160
00:52:14,880 --> 00:52:16,917
You gotta be fucking shitting me.
1161
00:52:17,080 --> 00:52:19,037
Stay tuned for more announcements.
1162
00:52:24,400 --> 00:52:25,675
Will you guys shut the fuck up?
1163
00:52:41,560 --> 00:52:42,914
Here we go.
1164
00:52:44,360 --> 00:52:47,558
All right. Police are in
Strickland's classroom with Mehar.
1165
00:52:48,280 --> 00:52:49,999
But that dog ain't finding shit.
1166
00:52:50,160 --> 00:52:52,595
- What?
- You sure that kid really sold you meth?
1167
00:52:52,760 --> 00:52:54,240
Well, no. It wasn't meth. It was molly.
1168
00:52:54,440 --> 00:52:55,999
- Molly?
- Yeah. Why? What?
1169
00:52:56,160 --> 00:52:57,913
Dogs can't smell molly. What did you do?
1170
00:52:58,080 --> 00:52:59,070
What do you mean, what did I do?
1171
00:52:59,280 --> 00:53:00,555
I didn't know they can't smell molly.
Why not?
1172
00:53:00,720 --> 00:53:04,790
Campbell, you have to train a dog
to smell specific drugs, okay?
1173
00:53:05,040 --> 00:53:06,030
How do you think this thing works?
1174
00:53:06,280 --> 00:53:08,317
I don't know how it works.
I thought you guys knew how it worked.
1175
00:53:08,520 --> 00:53:09,510
We do.
1176
00:53:09,680 --> 00:53:11,194
Well, if you do, you should have told me.
What the...
1177
00:53:11,360 --> 00:53:13,113
- Oh, snap!
- What?
1178
00:53:13,280 --> 00:53:15,112
Cops are leaving the classroom.
1179
00:53:15,280 --> 00:53:16,953
- This is over.
- It's over?
1180
00:53:17,120 --> 00:53:18,156
Campbell, I'm from the streets.
1181
00:53:18,320 --> 00:53:20,437
Trust me when I tell you it's over.
1182
00:53:20,600 --> 00:53:22,956
Oh, shit! God damn it. Fucking damn it!
1183
00:53:23,120 --> 00:53:24,520
Okay. You know what? You have to relax.
1184
00:53:24,720 --> 00:53:26,632
I got something for you.
Take a hit of this.
1185
00:53:26,920 --> 00:53:28,115
Yeah. Yeah.
1186
00:53:29,800 --> 00:53:32,269
What the fuck is that?
I thought you said you didn't have drugs!
1187
00:53:32,440 --> 00:53:34,272
I don't. I have weed.
1188
00:53:34,840 --> 00:53:36,069
Jesus! Fuck! Give...
1189
00:53:47,280 --> 00:53:49,158
Nice landing, dick wad.
1190
00:53:53,800 --> 00:53:56,156
You tried to plant drugs on me,
didn't you?
1191
00:53:56,360 --> 00:53:58,317
That's why that dog was here.
1192
00:53:58,560 --> 00:54:00,836
But they couldn't smell
those drugs, could they?
1193
00:54:05,320 --> 00:54:06,720
You fucked up, Campbell.
1194
00:54:07,760 --> 00:54:09,194
I'm in your head.
1195
00:54:09,760 --> 00:54:11,911
I know what you gonna do
before you even do it.
1196
00:54:12,080 --> 00:54:13,639
Back off. Back off.
1197
00:54:13,800 --> 00:54:15,598
All your hard work,
1198
00:54:15,760 --> 00:54:18,150
sneaking around lying and shit.
1199
00:54:19,280 --> 00:54:21,875
Now it's just you and me.
1200
00:54:22,680 --> 00:54:23,716
Don't come closer.
1201
00:54:23,880 --> 00:54:25,030
What you think? They're gonna come in here
1202
00:54:25,240 --> 00:54:28,039
if you light that little
toothpick pencil joint?
1203
00:54:28,240 --> 00:54:29,435
You wanna find out?
1204
00:54:30,720 --> 00:54:32,518
Hey! Don't do it.
1205
00:54:33,120 --> 00:54:34,156
You be a man.
1206
00:54:34,440 --> 00:54:36,033
I refuse!
1207
00:54:36,200 --> 00:54:39,034
You know, first I was just
gonna punch you a whole lot, Campbell.
1208
00:54:40,360 --> 00:54:43,159
Now, I think I'm gonna break
every bone in your body.
1209
00:54:44,120 --> 00:54:45,270
Help!
1210
00:54:45,440 --> 00:54:46,760
Help! Police!
1211
00:54:46,920 --> 00:54:47,910
What the fuck are you doing, man?
1212
00:54:48,120 --> 00:54:49,713
Get away from that God damn door.
1213
00:54:51,280 --> 00:54:53,192
You know what? I should kill your ass.
1214
00:54:53,800 --> 00:54:54,995
Okay, guys.
1215
00:54:55,160 --> 00:54:56,913
What seems to be the trouble here?
1216
00:54:57,400 --> 00:54:58,914
Strickland was smoking marijuana.
1217
00:54:59,200 --> 00:55:01,396
And he has molly in his bag.
1218
00:55:01,560 --> 00:55:02,550
And who are you?
1219
00:55:02,760 --> 00:55:04,319
I'll straighten this out for everyone.
1220
00:55:04,480 --> 00:55:06,551
Mr. Andy Campbell, English teacher.
1221
00:55:06,720 --> 00:55:09,076
Probably a nice guy,
but a bit of a worm and a sneak.
1222
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:11,875
Mr. Strickland, reputation of a hot-head.
1223
00:55:12,040 --> 00:55:14,077
Scary, yet effective with the students.
1224
00:55:14,320 --> 00:55:16,073
Do I trust either of them?
1225
00:55:16,240 --> 00:55:17,674
Absolutely not.
1226
00:55:18,240 --> 00:55:19,230
All right, we got this.
1227
00:55:19,440 --> 00:55:20,794
Yeah, we got this.
1228
00:55:21,000 --> 00:55:22,229
You stay out this shit, Mehar.
1229
00:55:22,400 --> 00:55:24,596
Technically, this is occurring
during school hours,
1230
00:55:24,800 --> 00:55:26,553
so I cannot stay out this S-word.
1231
00:55:26,760 --> 00:55:29,559
There is contraband in here.
Who does this belong to?
1232
00:55:29,760 --> 00:55:32,070
Him. The drugs are in his bag.
1233
00:55:32,240 --> 00:55:34,357
This man is obviously the drug addict.
1234
00:55:34,560 --> 00:55:36,233
Look at his eyes. They burgundy red.
1235
00:55:36,400 --> 00:55:38,073
Let the record reflect his eyes are red.
1236
00:55:38,240 --> 00:55:40,357
I mean, it's very dry in the room.
1237
00:55:40,600 --> 00:55:41,954
It's not that dry.
1238
00:55:42,120 --> 00:55:43,873
It is wet with lies.
1239
00:55:44,080 --> 00:55:45,719
He's holding an ax!
1240
00:55:45,880 --> 00:55:46,916
This is true as well.
1241
00:55:47,080 --> 00:55:49,072
Mr. Strickland is brandishing a weapon.
1242
00:55:51,440 --> 00:55:52,590
We all saw that.
1243
00:55:52,760 --> 00:55:55,355
Am I the only one here
who sees what's going on? Hello!
1244
00:55:55,520 --> 00:55:56,510
Hello.
1245
00:55:56,720 --> 00:55:58,837
Not hello you.
Hello, we're in his classroom!
1246
00:55:59,040 --> 00:56:00,235
Hello, there are drugs in his bag!
1247
00:56:00,400 --> 00:56:03,040
Hello, this man
is obviously the culprit here.
1248
00:56:03,240 --> 00:56:04,913
I just said "hello" back.
He said "hello," I said "hello."
1249
00:56:05,080 --> 00:56:07,072
Let's move past that.
Just arrest... Arrest the guy.
1250
00:56:07,280 --> 00:56:09,192
Campbell, you've had your say.
1251
00:56:09,760 --> 00:56:11,956
Mr. Strickland, care to respond?
1252
00:56:15,600 --> 00:56:16,954
Fuck the police.
1253
00:56:19,080 --> 00:56:20,639
Nice plan, asshole.
1254
00:56:28,160 --> 00:56:31,756
Ally, hey! Sweetie, listen,
1255
00:56:31,920 --> 00:56:32,910
something's come up
1256
00:56:33,080 --> 00:56:36,790
at uh, work and...
1257
00:56:37,880 --> 00:56:42,238
I'm not gonna be
able to make it to the talent show.
1258
00:56:42,680 --> 00:56:45,070
Daddy, you promised you would make it.
1259
00:56:45,240 --> 00:56:46,594
You promised me.
1260
00:56:46,760 --> 00:56:47,876
I know.
1261
00:56:48,320 --> 00:56:51,711
Sometimes, adults' lives are complicated,
1262
00:56:51,880 --> 00:56:53,758
you know, funny things you can't predict.
1263
00:56:53,920 --> 00:56:55,991
I can't believe you're not gonna come.
1264
00:56:56,760 --> 00:56:58,717
I'm gonna look like such an idiot.
1265
00:56:59,120 --> 00:57:00,713
Trisha's gonna ruin me.
1266
00:57:00,880 --> 00:57:01,996
Forget about that girl.
1267
00:57:02,160 --> 00:57:04,720
I mean, she sounds like a big bully to me.
1268
00:57:04,880 --> 00:57:07,111
And believe me, I know what that's like.
1269
00:57:08,160 --> 00:57:09,150
Hello?
1270
00:57:20,120 --> 00:57:21,918
Unbelievable.
1271
00:57:23,840 --> 00:57:25,274
Unbelievable.
1272
00:57:25,760 --> 00:57:28,195
Yeah, that's what it is, you know.
1273
00:57:28,880 --> 00:57:30,030
You know what I told my wife today?
1274
00:57:30,200 --> 00:57:32,874
I said, "Hey, honey,
everything's gonna be okay."
1275
00:57:33,040 --> 00:57:36,351
Yeah. And that
was a big fat lie, wasn't it?
1276
00:57:37,160 --> 00:57:40,035
I mean, I'm definitely not gonna make
the meeting, so I'll lose my job,
1277
00:57:40,200 --> 00:57:41,873
and I've let my daughter down,
1278
00:57:42,040 --> 00:57:45,829
and now I'm probably gonna be in prison
when my child is born. So...
1279
00:57:47,040 --> 00:57:48,520
Yo, who fault is that?
1280
00:57:50,000 --> 00:57:51,719
No, that's a good question.
Whose fault is it?
1281
00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:54,349
It's your fucking fault.
Are you fucking kidding me?
1282
00:57:54,520 --> 00:57:55,715
Yeah, because you know what I don't do?
1283
00:57:55,880 --> 00:57:58,031
I don't swing axes at the students.
1284
00:57:58,240 --> 00:58:01,153
Yeah, that's a little bit
of a step too far, I think.
1285
00:58:01,360 --> 00:58:03,477
But not for you. No. You know why?
1286
00:58:03,640 --> 00:58:05,279
Because you're a fucking maniac.
1287
00:58:05,760 --> 00:58:07,399
"Whose fault is it?" God damn it!
1288
00:58:08,280 --> 00:58:09,555
Fucking crazy.
1289
00:58:33,480 --> 00:58:36,439
What's up, man? How are you doing?
1290
00:58:36,600 --> 00:58:39,195
Yeah, getting locked up. It's fucking...
1291
00:58:39,360 --> 00:58:41,272
This is some BS, right? Shit.
1292
00:58:42,280 --> 00:58:45,671
I... I don't mean to,
you know, interrupt your
1293
00:58:47,160 --> 00:58:49,516
seething or whatever it is
you're doing over here,
1294
00:58:49,680 --> 00:58:54,118
but I just got in a little argument
with my friend
1295
00:58:54,440 --> 00:58:58,036
and he starts talking
some serious shit about you.
1296
00:58:58,600 --> 00:59:00,000
And he's goin' on and on,
1297
00:59:00,160 --> 00:59:03,198
and he's calling you a bitch,
and a big fat pussy,
1298
00:59:03,360 --> 00:59:05,955
and a little fucking pussy bitch,
1299
00:59:06,120 --> 00:59:07,679
and he says that you're his bitch.
1300
00:59:07,840 --> 00:59:09,115
- What?
- Yeah.
1301
00:59:09,280 --> 00:59:11,476
I couldn't believe it.
He just keeps going on and on and on
1302
00:59:11,640 --> 00:59:12,790
that he wants to fight you.
1303
00:59:12,960 --> 00:59:16,431
I'm like, "This guy?
There's no way! No way!"
1304
00:59:16,640 --> 00:59:17,630
- Him?
- Well, don't point.
1305
00:59:17,800 --> 00:59:18,790
Yeah, don't point.
1306
00:59:19,400 --> 00:59:20,754
What, it's your first time
getting locked up, man?
1307
00:59:20,920 --> 00:59:24,152
Come on. Yeah. But, yeah, him. Yeah.
1308
00:59:24,920 --> 00:59:27,310
If he wants to fight me, I'm right here.
1309
00:59:29,160 --> 00:59:30,150
Yeah.
1310
00:59:31,040 --> 00:59:33,236
Yeah, you're here. He's there.
1311
00:59:33,400 --> 00:59:34,675
You could just go over there.
1312
00:59:35,440 --> 00:59:36,840
And I'd stay here
1313
00:59:37,000 --> 00:59:38,639
if you're worried about losing your seat.
1314
00:59:40,800 --> 00:59:43,031
I can see that that's not it.
Okay. I tell you what.
1315
00:59:43,200 --> 00:59:47,274
I'll go over there,
and if he nods like this
1316
00:59:47,440 --> 00:59:50,512
that means he wants to fight you now.
1317
00:59:50,680 --> 00:59:53,673
But again, man, he's not gonna come here
1318
00:59:54,160 --> 00:59:56,675
because he thinks you're a big fat bitch.
1319
00:59:56,840 --> 00:59:58,115
Again, these are his words,
they're not mine.
1320
00:59:58,320 --> 01:00:00,357
So just look for that nod
and know that he's calling you
1321
01:00:00,520 --> 01:00:01,556
the biggest bitch on the planet.
1322
01:00:01,720 --> 01:00:02,995
Okay. I gotta go.
1323
01:00:09,680 --> 01:00:11,353
Okay, so you still wanna fight?
1324
01:00:17,480 --> 01:00:19,153
Forget it.
1325
01:00:20,760 --> 01:00:21,876
What?
1326
01:00:22,520 --> 01:00:24,830
Maybe I went a little overboard earlier.
1327
01:00:26,400 --> 01:00:28,198
But at least I did something.
1328
01:00:29,680 --> 01:00:30,909
Fight's off.
1329
01:00:31,720 --> 01:00:33,074
Wait. What? Why?
1330
01:00:33,760 --> 01:00:35,877
First, I was just pissed off at you.
1331
01:00:37,320 --> 01:00:39,039
Wanted to wring your little neck.
1332
01:00:40,040 --> 01:00:41,918
- Yeah.
- But then I start thinking.
1333
01:00:42,840 --> 01:00:44,240
What if the school saw
1334
01:00:44,400 --> 01:00:46,960
how they pitted two teachers
against each other?
1335
01:00:48,040 --> 01:00:51,556
Maybe the fight'll make a difference
and something would change.
1336
01:00:52,360 --> 01:00:54,397
But you won't even man up and fight.
1337
01:00:54,920 --> 01:00:55,990
So, forget it.
1338
01:00:56,720 --> 01:01:00,111
Fight's off. You can go
take a free period now.
1339
01:01:02,320 --> 01:01:03,549
That's...
1340
01:01:05,160 --> 01:01:07,072
That's the best news
I've heard all day. That's great.
1341
01:01:07,240 --> 01:01:08,833
Yeah! I'll take that free period.
1342
01:01:09,000 --> 01:01:10,832
Awesome, man. So, the fight's off?
1343
01:01:11,520 --> 01:01:12,749
That's great!
1344
01:01:13,480 --> 01:01:15,915
You nodding at me? Fuck you!
1345
01:01:16,080 --> 01:01:18,117
No, no, no! Sorry, sir.
That nod was not for you.
1346
01:01:18,320 --> 01:01:19,640
You can sit back down.
1347
01:01:19,800 --> 01:01:21,200
You wanna fight me, bitch?
1348
01:01:21,720 --> 01:01:23,040
What'd you say to me?
1349
01:01:23,240 --> 01:01:25,436
No, no, no! He doesn't
wanna fight you anymore.
1350
01:01:25,600 --> 01:01:26,750
- Yeah, no. Go back.
- Anymore?
1351
01:01:26,920 --> 01:01:29,515
At all! Yeah, no.
Guys, there's no fights today.
1352
01:01:29,680 --> 01:01:30,716
Didn't you hear? Great news!
1353
01:01:30,880 --> 01:01:32,633
Man, stand up, bitch. What you got?
1354
01:01:32,800 --> 01:01:34,120
Oh, no!
1355
01:01:34,320 --> 01:01:35,310
Oh.
1356
01:01:36,440 --> 01:01:37,430
Oh.
1357
01:01:38,640 --> 01:01:39,960
I got a whole lot!
1358
01:01:40,120 --> 01:01:41,110
I got stuff, too.
1359
01:01:41,280 --> 01:01:42,873
But I'm not fighting, you know?
1360
01:01:43,040 --> 01:01:45,475
Guys, guys, this has just
been a misunderstanding.
1361
01:01:49,840 --> 01:01:51,399
- Yeah.
- All right.
1362
01:01:55,440 --> 01:01:58,353
Go to sleep.
1363
01:01:58,720 --> 01:02:00,632
Go to sleep.
1364
01:02:00,800 --> 01:02:02,917
Nighty-night. Nighty-night.
1365
01:02:05,040 --> 01:02:06,713
You sic this man on me, Campbell?
1366
01:02:08,040 --> 01:02:10,680
That was a mistake. Yeah. That...
1367
01:02:12,040 --> 01:02:13,474
I changed my mind.
1368
01:02:14,120 --> 01:02:15,554
Okay. Calm down.
1369
01:02:16,160 --> 01:02:17,719
The fight is back on.
1370
01:02:17,920 --> 01:02:19,957
Come on, man. You might have done
the same thing in my position.
1371
01:02:20,120 --> 01:02:22,635
This time I'm gonna kill your ass.
1372
01:02:22,840 --> 01:02:25,514
Just take it easy.
Take a deep breath, okay?
1373
01:02:25,720 --> 01:02:27,439
Hey! You two.
1374
01:02:27,600 --> 01:02:29,239
The molly you tried to pin on each other
1375
01:02:29,400 --> 01:02:30,880
is aspirin. Come on.
1376
01:02:31,320 --> 01:02:33,596
Aspirin.
That little fucker tried to rip me off!
1377
01:02:34,000 --> 01:02:35,559
Wait a sec. What time is it?
What time is it?
1378
01:02:36,040 --> 01:02:37,110
I still got time!
1379
01:02:37,480 --> 01:02:38,994
I still have time to make everything!
1380
01:02:41,160 --> 01:02:44,676
Hey, Campbell! I'll see you at 3:00.
1381
01:02:56,880 --> 01:02:58,030
Hey!
1382
01:02:58,200 --> 01:02:59,429
It's a bloodbath in there.
1383
01:03:00,000 --> 01:03:02,754
Holly, Ms. Monet... We all got fired.
1384
01:03:02,960 --> 01:03:04,360
No! You, too?
1385
01:03:05,000 --> 01:03:07,356
These damn jeans didn't impress anybody.
1386
01:03:07,960 --> 01:03:09,599
Oh, shit. I'm sorry, Crawford.
1387
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:14,392
Hey, Suzie. I'm here.
Are they ready for me?
1388
01:03:14,600 --> 01:03:15,590
They said they need just a minute.
1389
01:03:15,760 --> 01:03:16,796
Okay, you sure it's
just gonna be a minute?
1390
01:03:16,960 --> 01:03:18,633
Because I'm trying to get
to my daughter's talent show.
1391
01:03:18,800 --> 01:03:20,200
Oh, it's just gonna be a minute.
1392
01:03:20,400 --> 01:03:21,959
- Suzie, I don't have a minute.
- Sixty seconds.
1393
01:03:24,160 --> 01:03:26,391
Shit! Okay.
1394
01:03:28,600 --> 01:03:29,954
Okay.
1395
01:03:40,600 --> 01:03:42,956
What the fuck is going on in there?
1396
01:03:47,240 --> 01:03:48,230
Just one more minute.
1397
01:03:48,400 --> 01:03:50,915
Respectfully, Suzie, fuck this, okay?
I'm going in.
1398
01:03:51,080 --> 01:03:52,230
- No, Andy.
- I'm going in!
1399
01:03:52,400 --> 01:03:54,119
Why do you think they haven't
called for you? Andy!
1400
01:03:54,280 --> 01:03:55,873
Hey, hi! I'm sorry, what's going on?
1401
01:03:56,040 --> 01:03:57,235
I was supposed to start at 2:15.
1402
01:03:57,760 --> 01:03:59,513
Oh! Uh, uh...
1403
01:03:59,760 --> 01:04:04,118
Superintendent Johnson and I were just
talking about his fishing trip to Alaska.
1404
01:04:04,640 --> 01:04:06,359
I caught a halibut.
1405
01:04:07,280 --> 01:04:10,637
You... You caught a halibut.
Well, congratulations, sir.
1406
01:04:10,800 --> 01:04:12,473
I... I'm sitting out there
and missing my daughter's...
1407
01:04:12,640 --> 01:04:13,630
You know what?
1408
01:04:13,800 --> 01:04:16,360
I don't wanna cause trouble. Could I just
make my teacher's statement now?
1409
01:04:16,520 --> 01:04:17,670
Is that all right?
1410
01:04:17,840 --> 01:04:20,275
Well, actually, that won't be necessary.
1411
01:04:21,920 --> 01:04:23,673
- Why?
- Turns out we've reached our limit
1412
01:04:23,880 --> 01:04:25,837
on how many experienced
teachers we can let go
1413
01:04:26,000 --> 01:04:27,878
and still be in compliance
with state policy.
1414
01:04:29,000 --> 01:04:30,639
We gotta make cuts from somewhere else.
1415
01:04:31,120 --> 01:04:32,759
Yeah. We're done here.
1416
01:04:33,320 --> 01:04:35,596
Anyway, it's an executive
course right by the airport, right?
1417
01:04:35,960 --> 01:04:38,919
Okay, thanks for the job, I guess.
1418
01:04:40,600 --> 01:04:42,478
Step tight. Pop! You know.
1419
01:04:44,520 --> 01:04:46,796
I'm sorry though.
What cuts are you gonna make?
1420
01:04:47,160 --> 01:04:48,389
It's none of your business, Campbell.
1421
01:04:48,560 --> 01:04:49,596
Well, no, it is my business, right?
1422
01:04:49,760 --> 01:04:50,796
I... I teach at the school.
1423
01:04:50,960 --> 01:04:52,440
So, what are you gonna do?
1424
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:56,440
I mean, you gonna cut buying new books
or are you gonna shorten the school year?
1425
01:04:57,000 --> 01:04:59,834
You gonna increase the class sizes again?
That one was a real bright idea.
1426
01:05:00,040 --> 01:05:02,475
Now would be a real good time
for you to stop talking.
1427
01:05:02,640 --> 01:05:04,711
Yeah, now... Now would
be a good time for me to stop talking,
1428
01:05:04,920 --> 01:05:06,036
but I'm not gonna stop talking, okay?
1429
01:05:06,200 --> 01:05:09,318
'Cause I... I'm asking a question.
So, I'm sorry, but what cut...
1430
01:05:09,480 --> 01:05:10,880
No, I'm not sorry. All right?
1431
01:05:11,040 --> 01:05:12,952
I think, in fact, I'm tired
of always saying I'm sorry.
1432
01:05:13,120 --> 01:05:15,316
I asked you guys
a direct fucking question.
1433
01:05:15,480 --> 01:05:16,470
What cutbacks are you gonna make?
1434
01:05:16,680 --> 01:05:18,672
Campbell, this doesn't concern you, okay?
1435
01:05:18,840 --> 01:05:19,990
You're just a teacher.
1436
01:05:20,680 --> 01:05:22,637
Wow! Really? I'm just a teacher?
1437
01:05:22,800 --> 01:05:24,519
Well, all right. You're right.
I may be just a teacher,
1438
01:05:24,680 --> 01:05:27,874
but I'm pretty sure that qualifies me
to ask a goddamn question
1439
01:05:28,040 --> 01:05:31,357
about something that's gonna affect
my ability to fucking teach!
1440
01:05:31,520 --> 01:05:34,080
Campbell, get your
ass out of here while you still got a job!
1441
01:05:34,280 --> 01:05:35,350
No, I can't do it, man,
1442
01:05:35,520 --> 01:05:37,193
because I'm done listening to you.
1443
01:05:38,120 --> 01:05:39,713
And I know I'm just a teacher,
1444
01:05:39,880 --> 01:05:41,792
but that ought to be worth
something around here.
1445
01:05:42,000 --> 01:05:44,151
In fact, that ought to be
worth everything to you guys,
1446
01:05:44,320 --> 01:05:46,789
but instead, you treat us like shit.
1447
01:05:47,000 --> 01:05:49,435
And you don't give us the tools
to do our jobs properly.
1448
01:05:50,400 --> 01:05:52,869
And I can't believe I'm saying this,
but Strickland's right.
1449
01:05:53,040 --> 01:05:54,872
The students are running
all over the fucking school.
1450
01:05:55,040 --> 01:05:57,953
So this may be just a teacher's opinion,
1451
01:05:58,120 --> 01:06:00,237
but you guys fucking suck at your jobs.
1452
01:06:00,840 --> 01:06:03,230
And if you ever leave me
waiting outside again
1453
01:06:03,400 --> 01:06:05,278
so you can talk about
a goddamn fishing trip,
1454
01:06:05,480 --> 01:06:06,675
I will walk right in here
1455
01:06:06,840 --> 01:06:09,400
and I'll punch you right in
the fucking teeth, Tyler.
1456
01:06:11,320 --> 01:06:13,198
Stick that halibut up your ass!
1457
01:06:23,480 --> 01:06:25,631
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
1458
01:06:25,800 --> 01:06:27,996
Six hundred minutes
1459
01:06:28,920 --> 01:06:31,116
Five hundred twenty-five thousand
1460
01:06:31,280 --> 01:06:33,272
Moments so dear
1461
01:06:34,400 --> 01:06:35,629
She's so lame.
1462
01:06:35,840 --> 01:06:38,514
Five hundred
twenty-five thousand six hundred minutes
1463
01:06:39,360 --> 01:06:43,240
- How do you measure a year in the life?
- Oh, God.
1464
01:06:43,880 --> 01:06:47,237
How about love?
1465
01:06:49,600 --> 01:06:52,479
How about love?
1466
01:06:54,720 --> 01:06:55,756
How about...
1467
01:07:01,560 --> 01:07:02,835
Oh, shit!
1468
01:07:04,080 --> 01:07:05,196
- Honey, what...
- Hey.
1469
01:07:05,360 --> 01:07:06,350
What the hell happened to you?
1470
01:07:06,520 --> 01:07:08,751
Sweetie. Look, I've had a crazy day, okay?
1471
01:07:08,960 --> 01:07:09,996
I... I don't have time to explain.
1472
01:07:10,160 --> 01:07:12,277
Look, can you do me a big favor right now?
1473
01:07:12,520 --> 01:07:13,510
Okay.
1474
01:07:13,720 --> 01:07:16,998
I need you to see if you can get them
to play that... That Big Sean song.
1475
01:07:17,160 --> 01:07:18,674
- Can you do it?
- Yeah. Okay.
1476
01:07:18,840 --> 01:07:19,956
Okay. I'm gonna talk to Ally.
1477
01:07:20,120 --> 01:07:21,952
Oh, my God! You're the best!
Okay. Thank you. Thank you.
1478
01:07:22,120 --> 01:07:24,794
Let's give it up again
for Ally Campbell and her...
1479
01:07:25,400 --> 01:07:26,800
And herself.
1480
01:07:30,160 --> 01:07:33,756
Hey, buddy. Um, I'm gonna
need a little favor from you.
1481
01:07:34,320 --> 01:07:36,357
Ally! Ally! Hey, sweetie.
1482
01:07:36,520 --> 01:07:38,000
Daddy, where were you?
1483
01:07:38,160 --> 01:07:39,833
Okay, okay, I can explain
that later, all right?
1484
01:07:40,000 --> 01:07:42,960
But right now, sweetie,
we're going right back out there.
1485
01:07:43,160 --> 01:07:44,355
No, Daddy. The rules are
that we have to...
1486
01:07:44,520 --> 01:07:45,510
Don't worry about the rules, okay?
1487
01:07:45,680 --> 01:07:46,670
We're not gonna play
by the rules, all right?
1488
01:07:46,880 --> 01:07:47,996
- We're not?
- No! Here's what we're gonna do.
1489
01:07:48,160 --> 01:07:49,640
We're gonna do the Big Sean song.
1490
01:07:50,200 --> 01:07:51,634
Wait, we are?
1491
01:07:51,800 --> 01:07:53,632
- Yeah! Mom's working on it.
- She is?
1492
01:07:53,840 --> 01:07:55,832
I'll follow your lead
and the moves are the same, right?
1493
01:07:56,000 --> 01:07:57,275
Yeah, the moves are the same.
1494
01:07:59,000 --> 01:08:00,480
There it goes. Okay, we gotta go.
1495
01:08:00,680 --> 01:08:02,239
- Let's get out there. Let's go.
- Okay, let's do this.
1496
01:08:03,120 --> 01:08:04,315
Go, go, go.
1497
01:08:05,640 --> 01:08:08,155
Trisha, this song is for you.
1498
01:08:09,320 --> 01:08:11,118
I don't fuck with you
1499
01:08:12,960 --> 01:08:15,839
You little stupid ass bitch
I ain't fuckin' with you
1500
01:08:16,000 --> 01:08:17,150
What?
1501
01:08:17,360 --> 01:08:19,317
You little
You little dumb ass bitch
1502
01:08:19,480 --> 01:08:21,073
I ain't fuckin' with you
1503
01:08:22,800 --> 01:08:24,200
I got a million trillion things
1504
01:08:24,360 --> 01:08:25,510
That I'd rather fuckin' do
1505
01:08:25,680 --> 01:08:27,114
All right, fuck it.
This what we're doing? All right.
1506
01:08:27,280 --> 01:08:29,158
Than to be fucking with you
1507
01:08:29,480 --> 01:08:30,675
Little stupid ass
I don't give a fuck
1508
01:08:30,840 --> 01:08:31,830
I don't give a fuck
1509
01:08:32,040 --> 01:08:33,235
I don't, I don't
I don't give a fuck
1510
01:08:33,400 --> 01:08:35,710
Bitch, I don't give a fuck about you
1511
01:08:35,920 --> 01:08:37,036
Or anything that you do
1512
01:08:37,200 --> 01:08:39,237
Don't give a fuck about you
or anything that you do
1513
01:08:39,400 --> 01:08:41,869
I heard you got a new man
I see you takin' a pic
1514
01:08:42,040 --> 01:08:44,350
Then you post it up
Thinkin' that it's makin' me sick
1515
01:08:44,520 --> 01:08:46,876
But I see you calling
I be makin' it quick
1516
01:08:47,040 --> 01:08:50,317
I'mma answer that shit like
I don't fuck with you
1517
01:08:52,320 --> 01:08:55,233
You little stupid ass bitch
I ain't fucking with you
1518
01:08:57,200 --> 01:08:59,954
You little dumb ass bitch
I ain't fucking with you
1519
01:09:01,320 --> 01:09:03,789
I got a million trillion things
That I'd rather fucking do
1520
01:09:03,960 --> 01:09:05,189
Okay, music stopped.
1521
01:09:05,360 --> 01:09:07,317
Than to be fucking with you
1522
01:09:07,480 --> 01:09:09,199
Little stupid ass
I don't give a fuck
1523
01:09:09,360 --> 01:09:10,350
- I don't give a fuck
- Yeah!
1524
01:09:10,520 --> 01:09:12,000
I don't, I don't
I don't give a fuck bitch.
1525
01:09:12,200 --> 01:09:13,953
- They just stopped the music.
- I don't give a fuck about you
1526
01:09:14,120 --> 01:09:15,110
Or anything that you do
1527
01:09:15,280 --> 01:09:16,600
Don't give a fuck about you
or anything that you do
1528
01:09:16,760 --> 01:09:18,399
Need you to stop. Okay.
1529
01:09:19,080 --> 01:09:20,753
Who's the loser now, Trisha?
1530
01:09:21,200 --> 01:09:22,759
Bully this, bitch!
1531
01:09:27,400 --> 01:09:28,993
Oh, my!
1532
01:09:29,400 --> 01:09:32,916
I was unaware of the lyrics
1533
01:09:33,280 --> 01:09:37,911
and... And the strong language
in that song, so I do apologize.
1534
01:09:39,040 --> 01:09:42,272
But you know what?
I apologize for nothing else.
1535
01:09:51,400 --> 01:09:53,392
Yeah! Way to go, Ally!
1536
01:09:53,560 --> 01:09:54,835
That's my girl!
1537
01:09:55,520 --> 01:09:56,954
Whoo! Oh. Damn!
1538
01:09:58,760 --> 01:09:59,750
Way to go, kid!
1539
01:09:59,960 --> 01:10:02,111
Thanks, Dad. I'm gonna
be a rock star here now.
1540
01:10:02,280 --> 01:10:03,794
Yeah, no.
1541
01:10:03,960 --> 01:10:05,599
- I... I think you're gonna be expelled.
- Oh...
1542
01:10:05,800 --> 01:10:07,393
Yeah, yeah. But, look, look,
I'm super proud of you
1543
01:10:07,560 --> 01:10:09,074
- for standing up for yourself, okay?
- Yeah.
1544
01:10:09,240 --> 01:10:10,435
All right, I gotta go do the same,
all right?
1545
01:10:10,640 --> 01:10:12,313
- Daddy's gotta run.
- Wait, where are you going?
1546
01:10:14,600 --> 01:10:16,114
Daddy's gotta get in a fist fight.
1547
01:10:24,120 --> 01:10:25,270
Shit!
1548
01:10:34,360 --> 01:10:36,272
Hey! That's my scooter!
1549
01:10:37,240 --> 01:10:38,310
No shit.
1550
01:10:40,840 --> 01:10:41,956
Fuck, man.
1551
01:11:11,600 --> 01:11:12,716
Mr. Campbell!
1552
01:11:28,040 --> 01:11:29,599
Let's go! Kill him!
1553
01:11:38,160 --> 01:11:41,153
- Come on, man, Campbell! Come on, baby.
- Yes, get him! Kill him!
1554
01:11:41,600 --> 01:11:44,672
Fucking kill him. Fucking destroy him.
1555
01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:07,994
You ready to do this, motherfucker?
1556
01:12:08,160 --> 01:12:10,914
You actually sound
like a real man, Campbell.
1557
01:12:11,080 --> 01:12:12,639
Maybe one of your nuts dropped today.
1558
01:12:12,800 --> 01:12:14,871
I'll drop your nuts, bitch.
Back the fuck up. Let's go.
1559
01:12:15,040 --> 01:12:16,190
You wanna see what I'm made out of?
1560
01:12:18,040 --> 01:12:19,190
Oh, fuck!
1561
01:12:20,560 --> 01:12:23,314
See? Let that be a lesson to you.
1562
01:12:23,920 --> 01:12:25,673
Actions have consequences.
1563
01:12:28,320 --> 01:12:29,800
Campbell!
1564
01:12:32,640 --> 01:12:34,472
You want some more of this, huh, boy?
1565
01:12:34,960 --> 01:12:36,110
Oh, shit!
1566
01:12:39,720 --> 01:12:41,120
How do you like
this ass-whooping, Campbell?
1567
01:12:41,280 --> 01:12:42,509
I fucking love it, bitch!
1568
01:12:51,160 --> 01:12:53,436
Ahh! Shit!
1569
01:12:53,680 --> 01:12:55,114
Oh, shit!
1570
01:12:57,440 --> 01:12:59,716
- Oh!
- That's my stuff, damn it!
1571
01:13:00,120 --> 01:13:01,634
Yeah!
1572
01:13:01,920 --> 01:13:03,115
Oh!
1573
01:13:06,480 --> 01:13:07,994
God damn it!
1574
01:13:09,040 --> 01:13:10,030
Fuck!
1575
01:13:10,200 --> 01:13:12,112
- Oh, my God!
- Oh!
1576
01:13:12,720 --> 01:13:14,439
- Shit! Fuck this shit.
- Campbell, stay down!
1577
01:13:14,600 --> 01:13:16,193
Campbell, stay down!
1578
01:13:20,840 --> 01:13:22,240
Bruce Lee style!
1579
01:13:22,400 --> 01:13:23,516
God damn it.
1580
01:13:26,160 --> 01:13:27,958
Right here. I should just kill you.
1581
01:13:28,120 --> 01:13:29,110
Fuck you, man.
1582
01:13:29,280 --> 01:13:31,556
Whoever dies first haunts the school.
1583
01:13:31,840 --> 01:13:33,832
You've got this, Campbell!
1584
01:13:35,240 --> 01:13:36,879
Okay, come here. Come here.
1585
01:13:37,040 --> 01:13:38,190
Take it, bitch!
1586
01:13:38,360 --> 01:13:39,430
Fuck you!
1587
01:13:39,640 --> 01:13:41,711
Come on, this way.
1588
01:13:46,320 --> 01:13:49,677
- Stop this!
- It is not my job to stop this.
1589
01:13:49,880 --> 01:13:52,270
Fake ass John McEnroe!
1590
01:13:53,840 --> 01:13:54,990
Yeah!
1591
01:13:55,360 --> 01:13:57,033
Ooh, mother...
1592
01:14:02,240 --> 01:14:03,390
Oh!
1593
01:14:03,760 --> 01:14:05,114
Oh, shit!
1594
01:14:06,360 --> 01:14:07,919
Come on, motherfucker! Get up!
1595
01:14:09,400 --> 01:14:10,675
- You got this!
- Whoo!
1596
01:14:12,400 --> 01:14:13,550
I don't think he's got this.
1597
01:14:13,760 --> 01:14:15,080
Motherfucker!
1598
01:14:17,080 --> 01:14:18,070
Come on!
1599
01:14:20,320 --> 01:14:21,436
Kick his ass!
1600
01:14:22,200 --> 01:14:24,510
What's the matter, Campbell?
You looking tired.
1601
01:14:24,960 --> 01:14:26,872
You throwing less and less punches.
1602
01:14:27,120 --> 01:14:29,191
- It's "fewer and fewer."
- Oh!
1603
01:14:29,560 --> 01:14:32,473
The proper sentence structure
is "fewer and fewer".
1604
01:14:32,720 --> 01:14:34,632
Never trash talk an English teacher, okay?
1605
01:14:34,920 --> 01:14:36,434
Oh!
1606
01:14:47,680 --> 01:14:50,149
Get up, Campbell! Get up!
1607
01:14:50,320 --> 01:14:51,356
He's getting up!
1608
01:14:51,520 --> 01:14:52,670
Get up!
1609
01:14:53,400 --> 01:14:54,800
He's getting up!
1610
01:15:08,360 --> 01:15:10,238
You can run, but you can't hide.
1611
01:15:15,200 --> 01:15:16,395
Campbell!
1612
01:15:18,760 --> 01:15:20,353
Where you at, light roast?
1613
01:15:23,120 --> 01:15:24,440
Campbell?
1614
01:15:25,840 --> 01:15:27,559
Campbell?
1615
01:15:29,120 --> 01:15:30,952
Where the fuck are you at?
1616
01:15:31,600 --> 01:15:33,432
Surprise, bitch!
1617
01:15:33,920 --> 01:15:35,036
Get the fuck off me!
1618
01:15:35,960 --> 01:15:37,110
Shit!
1619
01:15:40,680 --> 01:15:43,593
You dirty mother...
What the fuck is this shit?
1620
01:15:44,000 --> 01:15:45,434
Campbell! Come here.
1621
01:15:45,640 --> 01:15:47,359
So I can fuck you up. Come here.
1622
01:15:47,560 --> 01:15:49,631
You know, I'm gonna kick your ass.
1623
01:15:49,800 --> 01:15:50,995
You want some of this?
1624
01:15:51,160 --> 01:15:52,674
You little son of a bitch.
1625
01:15:54,480 --> 01:15:55,470
What you got?
1626
01:15:55,640 --> 01:15:56,756
Come on, motherfucker.
1627
01:15:56,920 --> 01:15:58,593
What do I got?
1628
01:16:00,320 --> 01:16:01,834
I got nothing to lose!
1629
01:16:05,760 --> 01:16:07,433
Oh, I'm learning so much!
1630
01:16:08,200 --> 01:16:10,078
Almost there.
1631
01:16:10,560 --> 01:16:11,550
Oh!
1632
01:16:13,000 --> 01:16:14,832
I came anyway, motherfuckers!
1633
01:16:15,480 --> 01:16:17,073
Fuck over here. Shit!
1634
01:16:17,800 --> 01:16:20,031
Excuse me,
I'm the superintendent. Get out of my way.
1635
01:16:20,200 --> 01:16:23,637
I'mma kill you. Kill you.
Tap your fucking ass.
1636
01:16:23,800 --> 01:16:26,360
You like baseball, Strickland?
Batter up, bitch!
1637
01:16:28,280 --> 01:16:30,158
- The, uh, kids superglued that down.
- Huh?
1638
01:16:30,360 --> 01:16:32,272
I know. They're freaking clever.
1639
01:16:32,480 --> 01:16:33,834
Jesus, watch out!
1640
01:16:36,360 --> 01:16:37,840
Stay down, light roast.
1641
01:16:43,360 --> 01:16:45,511
What are you doing, Campbell? What the...
1642
01:16:49,840 --> 01:16:50,876
Fuck!
1643
01:16:55,160 --> 01:16:56,230
Fuck me!
1644
01:16:58,240 --> 01:16:59,276
Oh, shit!
1645
01:17:00,560 --> 01:17:01,880
Oh!
1646
01:17:02,320 --> 01:17:04,039
My fucking windshield!
1647
01:17:05,360 --> 01:17:06,350
Shit!
1648
01:17:14,880 --> 01:17:17,031
I'm about sick of this shit, Campbell.
1649
01:17:17,200 --> 01:17:18,839
You want some more of this, boy?
1650
01:17:23,240 --> 01:17:24,230
Oh!
1651
01:17:31,280 --> 01:17:33,158
School's out for the summer, everybody.
1652
01:17:35,920 --> 01:17:37,400
Whoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
1653
01:17:52,320 --> 01:17:54,676
Campbell! Campbell!
1654
01:17:54,840 --> 01:17:57,116
I'm never gonna stop fighting! Uh-uh!
1655
01:17:57,280 --> 01:17:59,954
I'm never gonna stop fighting for myself.
1656
01:18:00,120 --> 01:18:01,998
For my family, for this school!
1657
01:18:02,160 --> 01:18:04,914
The fight never ends!
The fight never ends!
1658
01:18:05,960 --> 01:18:07,440
Whoo!
1659
01:18:08,560 --> 01:18:09,914
Like he said,
1660
01:18:10,120 --> 01:18:11,554
the fight never ends.
1661
01:18:12,400 --> 01:18:13,595
Unless you're him.
1662
01:18:21,720 --> 01:18:22,756
Hello?
1663
01:18:23,520 --> 01:18:26,797
Uh, no, well, he's...
He's actually out right now.
1664
01:18:27,640 --> 01:18:28,630
Uh-huh.
1665
01:18:29,160 --> 01:18:30,879
Oh, shit, okay.
1666
01:18:31,200 --> 01:18:32,759
I'll make him aware.
1667
01:18:33,960 --> 01:18:36,270
Water! Anybody got water?
1668
01:18:44,320 --> 01:18:45,470
What happened?
1669
01:18:46,320 --> 01:18:47,800
You got knocked the fuck out.
1670
01:18:48,000 --> 01:18:49,150
Yeah, I feel that now.
1671
01:18:49,320 --> 01:18:51,915
But look, man. Your wife just called.
She said you're having a baby.
1672
01:18:52,280 --> 01:18:54,556
Oh, shit, for real? I gotta go then.
1673
01:18:57,400 --> 01:18:58,959
Hey, look.
Can you give me a lift to the hospital?
1674
01:18:59,120 --> 01:19:00,634
I kind of totaled my car.
1675
01:19:01,320 --> 01:19:03,630
- All right. Let's roll. I got you.
- All right.
1676
01:19:04,000 --> 01:19:05,150
You got gas money?
1677
01:19:05,480 --> 01:19:07,312
Hey! Hey, you!
1678
01:19:08,960 --> 01:19:11,156
What the hell, man?
You're just gonna walk away?
1679
01:19:11,320 --> 01:19:13,789
Just gonna leave like this?
On these terms?
1680
01:19:14,760 --> 01:19:16,592
What the hell are you talking about?
1681
01:19:16,760 --> 01:19:17,796
Who are you? I...
1682
01:19:17,960 --> 01:19:19,917
Holly. We've been flirting,
like, all fucking year.
1683
01:19:20,080 --> 01:19:22,595
I've been, like, ignoring you all year.
1684
01:19:24,760 --> 01:19:25,750
Oh.
1685
01:19:26,280 --> 01:19:28,272
Because I've been playing
games with you all year.
1686
01:19:29,240 --> 01:19:30,230
I knew it!
1687
01:19:30,440 --> 01:19:33,000
It's 3:15 and I'm not a student anymore.
1688
01:19:34,200 --> 01:19:35,316
Let's do this.
1689
01:19:41,880 --> 01:19:44,190
Ah, shit.
1690
01:19:44,360 --> 01:19:45,919
Oh, yeah. Thanks.
1691
01:19:46,200 --> 01:19:48,590
Emergency! Hey, get off your ass, lady.
1692
01:19:49,000 --> 01:19:51,356
Sir, emergency's on the other
side of the building.
1693
01:19:51,520 --> 01:19:53,830
What? No, no. Not me. We need maternity.
1694
01:19:54,200 --> 01:19:55,554
Maternity's third floor.
1695
01:19:55,720 --> 01:19:57,200
Let's go deliver this baby.
1696
01:19:57,360 --> 01:19:59,079
- I got it from here. Yeah.
- You sure?
1697
01:19:59,240 --> 01:20:01,038
Yeah, it's a hospital.
So they got doctors and stuff.
1698
01:20:01,200 --> 01:20:02,793
But, listen. Uh...
1699
01:20:02,960 --> 01:20:03,950
Thank you, man.
1700
01:20:04,120 --> 01:20:05,600
Like, thank you for the fight. Really.
1701
01:20:08,520 --> 01:20:09,636
You did good.
1702
01:20:13,640 --> 01:20:14,869
Get the fuck off me. What you doing?
1703
01:20:15,080 --> 01:20:16,833
Yeah. That was a dumb idea.
All right, yeah. See ya.
1704
01:20:17,040 --> 01:20:18,030
Go hug your wife.
1705
01:20:18,200 --> 01:20:19,714
Two teachers pitted against each other
1706
01:20:19,880 --> 01:20:22,031
in a school fight
to end all school fights.
1707
01:20:22,200 --> 01:20:24,157
A lot of people are saying
this has proven the depths
1708
01:20:24,320 --> 01:20:26,118
to which the public school
system has fallen.
1709
01:20:26,280 --> 01:20:28,272
The school board is
launching an investigation
1710
01:20:28,440 --> 01:20:30,272
saying something needs to change.
1711
01:20:30,440 --> 01:20:32,432
- Yeah.
- Live from Roosevelt High School,
1712
01:20:32,640 --> 01:20:33,915
Channel 68 News.
1713
01:20:34,080 --> 01:20:35,196
That's us.
1714
01:20:36,400 --> 01:20:38,596
Hashtag teacher fight!
1715
01:20:42,440 --> 01:20:43,430
- Maggie! Hi!
- Andy!
1716
01:20:43,640 --> 01:20:45,552
I was so afraid that you wouldn't make it.
1717
01:20:46,240 --> 01:20:47,515
- Are you okay?
- What happened to you?
1718
01:20:47,680 --> 01:20:48,830
I... I got into a little bit of a fight.
1719
01:20:49,000 --> 01:20:50,320
With who? You look like hell!
1720
01:20:50,480 --> 01:20:52,039
- With another teacher. Yeah.
- What?
1721
01:20:52,240 --> 01:20:54,630
But it's okay.
So, honey, listen to me. Listen to me.
1722
01:20:55,000 --> 01:20:56,673
- I lost my job.
- What?
1723
01:20:56,840 --> 01:20:58,069
But not 'cause I didn't
stand up to those guys.
1724
01:20:58,240 --> 01:20:59,674
You should have seen me
stand up to those guys.
1725
01:20:59,840 --> 01:21:02,480
- No, no, no, it's because you were right!
- Yeah? Okay.
1726
01:21:02,640 --> 01:21:04,711
And... And I want you to
believe me right now.
1727
01:21:04,920 --> 01:21:06,070
I want you to believe me
1728
01:21:06,240 --> 01:21:08,197
when I tell you
everything's gonna be okay.
1729
01:21:11,320 --> 01:21:13,312
- Yeah?
- I believe you.
1730
01:21:13,480 --> 01:21:14,470
- You do?
- I believe you.
1731
01:21:14,680 --> 01:21:15,670
Yeah?
1732
01:21:15,840 --> 01:21:17,638
- Everything's gonna be okay, sweetie.
- It's gonna be okay.
1733
01:21:17,800 --> 01:21:18,790
Oh, God!
1734
01:21:18,960 --> 01:21:20,076
Is it time to push? Or where are we?
1735
01:21:20,240 --> 01:21:21,754
Oh, no. We've been pushing
for a while, baby.
1736
01:21:21,920 --> 01:21:23,240
- Okay. Go! Push!
- Here we go.
1737
01:21:23,440 --> 01:21:24,874
Here we go.
1738
01:21:33,040 --> 01:21:34,190
She's squirming around.
1739
01:21:34,360 --> 01:21:35,589
I think we got
a little fighter on our hands.
1740
01:21:35,760 --> 01:21:37,035
- I think so, too.
- You wanna take her for a minute?
1741
01:21:37,320 --> 01:21:38,470
- I would love to.
- Okay.
1742
01:21:38,640 --> 01:21:39,676
- Are you a little hungry?
- Yeah!
1743
01:21:39,920 --> 01:21:40,910
Are you a little hungry, baby?
1744
01:21:41,120 --> 01:21:42,554
- Time to eat!
- Yeah!
1745
01:21:42,720 --> 01:21:44,040
Hey, Ally looks happy, huh?
1746
01:21:44,200 --> 01:21:46,351
Oh, yeah! She's very popular now.
1747
01:21:46,680 --> 01:21:48,478
I think some of the kids are
actually kind of afraid of her.
1748
01:21:48,640 --> 01:21:49,960
That's a good thing, I think.
1749
01:21:51,120 --> 01:21:52,474
How we doing here? What you going for?
1750
01:21:52,640 --> 01:21:53,835
Hot dog? Hamburger?
1751
01:21:54,000 --> 01:21:56,151
Both! Hey, Crawford, you want a dog?
1752
01:21:56,400 --> 01:21:59,837
I want a dog but no bun.
I'm trying to fit into my skinny jeans.
1753
01:22:00,160 --> 01:22:02,072
I think I look good in them.
1754
01:22:02,240 --> 01:22:03,469
Trying to fit into his skinny jeans.
1755
01:22:03,640 --> 01:22:04,835
Yeah, yeah. It's not his look.
1756
01:22:05,000 --> 01:22:06,229
- Campbell.
- They look terrible.
1757
01:22:09,040 --> 01:22:11,555
Well, well, well.
Look what the cat dragged in.
1758
01:22:11,720 --> 01:22:13,359
You here to fire everybody again?
1759
01:22:13,520 --> 01:22:14,670
Yeah, yeah. Cut the shit, Campbell.
1760
01:22:14,840 --> 01:22:16,832
I don't wanna be here
any more than you want me to, okay?
1761
01:22:17,000 --> 01:22:18,878
Well, I wouldn't say that
I don't want you here.
1762
01:22:19,040 --> 01:22:20,952
But why are you here?
1763
01:22:21,160 --> 01:22:23,356
Well, because of the media attention,
1764
01:22:24,320 --> 01:22:27,996
you and Strickland became
like education folk heroes.
1765
01:22:28,160 --> 01:22:29,230
Yeah, how about that, huh?
1766
01:22:29,400 --> 01:22:33,235
So, the board wants both of you back
at Roosevelt because of this PR mess.
1767
01:22:33,920 --> 01:22:37,391
So, this is fun. So, he sent you here
1768
01:22:38,360 --> 01:22:39,919
to beg me to come back?
1769
01:22:40,480 --> 01:22:42,392
He said my job depends on it.
1770
01:22:42,600 --> 01:22:43,670
Did he really?
1771
01:22:43,840 --> 01:22:46,150
Ouch. Shoot.
1772
01:22:46,320 --> 01:22:48,437
So, this is a tough one for me, you know?
1773
01:22:48,600 --> 01:22:50,956
'Cause I didn't leave
on great terms and...
1774
01:22:52,840 --> 01:22:55,514
Boy, it sucks when your
job's in someone else's hands like this.
1775
01:22:55,680 --> 01:22:57,034
Enough of your shit, okay?
1776
01:22:57,240 --> 01:22:58,390
Are you gonna come back or not?
1777
01:22:58,880 --> 01:23:00,109
Tell you what.
1778
01:23:01,280 --> 01:23:03,078
I'll come back on one condition.
1779
01:23:03,720 --> 01:23:04,995
You the man, Campbell!
1780
01:23:05,200 --> 01:23:06,190
Thank you.
1781
01:23:06,360 --> 01:23:07,919
Thanks for getting our jobs back.
1782
01:23:08,080 --> 01:23:09,275
I'm glad I didn't cut you.
1783
01:23:09,440 --> 01:23:11,079
Yeah. Huh?
1784
01:23:11,560 --> 01:23:13,074
Yeah, you really saved our asses.
1785
01:23:17,400 --> 01:23:18,390
Yo!
1786
01:23:19,000 --> 01:23:20,559
Hey!
1787
01:23:20,760 --> 01:23:22,353
Look, man, I'm, uh...
1788
01:23:22,520 --> 01:23:24,637
I'm really happy you decided
to take your job back.
1789
01:23:24,920 --> 01:23:26,400
Yeah. To be honest,
1790
01:23:26,600 --> 01:23:28,239
I kinda missed these little fuckers.
1791
01:23:28,800 --> 01:23:30,234
They keep me young, you know what I mean?
1792
01:23:30,720 --> 01:23:34,760
All right, well, what do you say we get
back to work and no free periods, right?
1793
01:23:35,160 --> 01:23:36,833
- Goddamn right.
- Okay.
1794
01:23:38,000 --> 01:23:39,639
Hey! Hey!
1795
01:23:40,040 --> 01:23:41,235
You cut out all that grab-assing.
1796
01:23:41,400 --> 01:23:42,993
You get your ass to detention, Freddie.
1797
01:23:43,200 --> 01:23:45,920
All right, I'm not joking around.
You get there before I kick it there!
1798
01:23:46,120 --> 01:23:47,349
I will kick you into oblivion, Freddie.
1799
01:23:47,520 --> 01:23:49,557
I will kick you into dust!
1800
01:23:51,040 --> 01:23:53,714
Whoa, Campbell. Take it down a notch.
1801
01:23:54,480 --> 01:23:57,598
I'm supposed to be the scariest
motherfucker in this school, not you.
1802
01:23:57,800 --> 01:24:00,315
That's true. All right, man,
you ready to do this thing?
1803
01:24:00,480 --> 01:24:02,073
- Do it.
- Boom.
1804
01:24:02,840 --> 01:24:05,036
Up top! Down low.
1805
01:24:05,200 --> 01:24:06,953
- Enough of that shit.
- I'll fight you again.
1806
01:24:17,960 --> 01:24:20,236
I've been waiting to
fuck you up for a long time.
1807
01:24:21,480 --> 01:24:22,960
Why?
1808
01:24:24,320 --> 01:24:25,390
But I'll tell you for an iPhone.
1809
01:24:25,560 --> 01:24:26,550
Listen to me, you fuck shit.
1810
01:24:26,720 --> 01:24:27,915
I will fucking rip your
head off of your head.
1811
01:24:28,160 --> 01:24:29,150
I will shit down your neck.
1812
01:24:29,320 --> 01:24:32,074
I will fucking smash
my shit into your butthole.
1813
01:24:34,840 --> 01:24:36,160
Is there...
1814
01:24:36,320 --> 01:24:37,310
A horse?
1815
01:24:37,480 --> 01:24:38,834
- Yeah, there's some shit.
- Sorry about that, guys.
1816
01:24:39,000 --> 01:24:40,229
- Right. I'm out.
- Cut.
1817
01:24:40,800 --> 01:24:42,393
See you in a bit.
1818
01:24:43,480 --> 01:24:45,392
I never said nothing about no running.
1819
01:24:45,600 --> 01:24:46,954
Who's you? Seabiscuit?
1820
01:24:47,240 --> 01:24:48,560
You don't run nowhere.
1821
01:24:48,720 --> 01:24:51,280
That's the old Andy
because the new Andy...
1822
01:24:51,480 --> 01:24:52,550
I'm not gonna...
1823
01:24:52,720 --> 01:24:55,110
I'm gonna just ramble. Forever.
1824
01:24:55,280 --> 01:24:57,511
I think maybe one of
your nuts dropped today.
1825
01:24:58,160 --> 01:25:01,676
I'mma drop your nuts down somewhere.
1826
01:25:04,320 --> 01:25:05,515
Finish it!
1827
01:25:05,680 --> 01:25:07,956
- Fuck this shit!
- Come on. This way.
1828
01:25:11,040 --> 01:25:12,076
Make it whole wheat.
1829
01:25:12,240 --> 01:25:13,833
And can I have some
pork and beans with that?
1830
01:25:14,040 --> 01:25:15,520
No dog. Just tuna fish.
1831
01:25:15,680 --> 01:25:17,512
Just a little bit of
sauerkraut and some relish.
1832
01:25:17,680 --> 01:25:18,830
Just Cheezdoodles.
1833
01:25:19,000 --> 01:25:20,992
Light on the cheese
and heavy on the doodle.
1834
01:25:21,160 --> 01:25:22,560
I'm trying to be like Steve McQueen.
1835
01:25:22,760 --> 01:25:23,750
They call me True Grit.
1836
01:25:23,920 --> 01:25:26,719
I'm a weirdo. You know my style.
1837
01:25:28,840 --> 01:25:31,196
Yeah. I'm stressed out, too.
My neighbor got a cat.
1838
01:25:31,520 --> 01:25:33,557
- Oh, you don't like a cat looking at you?
- Creeps me out.
1839
01:25:33,720 --> 01:25:36,360
It's always when I'm masturbating, too.
1840
01:25:38,240 --> 01:25:40,197
I will be done with my classes by then.
1841
01:25:40,400 --> 01:25:42,551
It's not a fucking question!
1842
01:25:46,880 --> 01:25:47,916
I still have the knife.
1843
01:25:48,120 --> 01:25:49,713
Say the word and I will end him.
1844
01:25:49,880 --> 01:25:51,280
Damn, girl. No!
1845
01:25:53,560 --> 01:25:55,074
Am I the only one here
1846
01:25:55,240 --> 01:25:56,560
who sees what's going on? Hello?
1847
01:25:56,720 --> 01:25:57,949
Hello.
1848
01:25:59,120 --> 01:26:00,236
Hello! Hello!
1849
01:26:00,400 --> 01:26:01,550
Hello.
1850
01:26:02,960 --> 01:26:04,917
He said "hello." And I said "hello" back.
1851
01:26:09,760 --> 01:26:11,080
I caught a halibut, man.
1852
01:26:13,200 --> 01:26:15,431
Way to go, Ally! That's my girl!
1853
01:26:17,760 --> 01:26:19,160
Bully this, bitch!
1854
01:26:22,680 --> 01:26:23,955
You have a wife? You got a wife?
1855
01:26:24,120 --> 01:26:26,715
Yes, you know I have a wife.
We talked about it two scenes ago.
1856
01:26:28,280 --> 01:26:29,634
Is that the wrong thing to do?
1857
01:26:29,800 --> 01:26:31,314
Is that an unlikeable thing to do?
1858
01:26:31,480 --> 01:26:33,756
Yeah! But boo-fucking-hoo!
1859
01:26:33,920 --> 01:26:36,355
I can be a dick, too.
You wanna see me be a dick?
1860
01:30:15,600 --> 01:30:17,273
Hmm. So what do you teach here?
1861
01:30:17,720 --> 01:30:20,235
I teach gym, but I'm a singer.
Can I sing a song to you?
1862
01:30:20,480 --> 01:30:21,516
Uh, uh...
1863
01:30:22,040 --> 01:30:23,030
Go ahead.
1864
01:30:23,280 --> 01:30:25,317
Shorty, I'm there for you
Anytime you need me
1865
01:30:25,520 --> 01:30:27,159
For real, girl
It's me in your world
1866
01:30:27,320 --> 01:30:30,154
Believe me, nothing make a
man feel better than a woman
1867
01:30:30,360 --> 01:30:32,670
Queen with a crown
that be down for whatever
1868
01:30:32,840 --> 01:30:35,036
There are few things
that's forever, my lady
1869
01:30:35,240 --> 01:30:37,277
We can make war or make babies
1870
01:30:37,840 --> 01:30:41,277
That's not technically a song.
That's kinda like a rap.
1871
01:30:41,440 --> 01:30:42,510
It still sound good, don't it?
1872
01:30:42,720 --> 01:30:43,710
It did! It did.
1873
01:30:43,920 --> 01:30:46,640
Why you keep shaking your legs
like you got something down there
1874
01:30:46,800 --> 01:30:48,393
- moving.
- Because you make me nervous.
1875
01:30:48,560 --> 01:30:50,438
Because I feel love when I see you.
1876
01:30:50,600 --> 01:30:52,273
And I mean love.
1877
01:30:52,520 --> 01:30:54,000
What'd you said your name was again?
1877
01:30:55,305 --> 01:31:01,333
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