Original subtitles

Morning, everyone.

Remember to get your votes in to name the new playground.

But don't feel obliged to call it the Mr. Cockhead Playground.

Oh, baby, baby.

Oh, I can't believe it's our last week as junior, Mum.

I can't believe we busted our booze and raised enough money to rebuild the

junior playground.

I hope the kids vote to call it the fundraiser's fun zone.

Oh, what about come on, swingers?

Hey, now I didn't get the scented candle or the hand cream from his light book

gift. I just had one job.

Because Tristan's mum can make the gift we thought we couldn't afford.

But that's the sweetest, most jealousy -inspiring gift ever.

Take that room. Thanks for the kid -made book that Mr. Jellyman will never read.

He'll never read it.

What?

waiting for you to drop your kebabs or something.

I've never seen you go so long without some kind of kerfuffle.

You know, right?

Oh!

Oh, sorry.

Can you get that way up?

Here come the fundraising go -getters.

I see why you like winning so much, Heather. It feels good looking someone

the eye and not seeing sympathy.

I know, right?

And letting the kids name the playground themselves was the stroke of genius,

Jess. We got that amazing gift. It was the one we couldn't afford.

Yeah. I even got a good price because it was a school mum starting a new

business. It's very impressive.

Does this mean what I think it means?

I think it does.

Congratulations on making good fundraising choices and resisting

tomfoolery. Oh, and more and I get a girl's night out.

Or a girl's night in, depending on my pre -Christmas budget challenges.

Slash opportunities.

So is Freddie Jr. getting a trophy at Room 1's prize giving today?

There are trophies?

Yeah, teachers usually email parents beforehand.

Right.

Oh, well, my slug boss had just forgotten to email me.

Yeah, that'd be it.

She's so silly. Yeah.

Miss Love's end -of -year trophy list.

Hmm.

My Freddie Jr.

We've got a busy mid -morning. We've got to finish the costumes, the shared

lunch, and then we've got to collect the votes for the name of the new

playground competition and take them to room 13.

I'll collect the votes.

Hey, have you been on your hot date with Comfortable Chris yet?

Yes and no.

That's a nice T -shirt, Amy.

Thanks. Stick up a hook and Mum's got it for me and said it was the kids' idea.

Fire means auntie or mum. I know what fire means.

Stacey Morrison's a personal friend.

We're a little low on mislikes. What's the class?

Voluntary. Compulsory. Call her.

Who dare not contribute to the compulsory class gift?

The usual lazy Susans. But I'll text and remind them. But I think we should let

Kevin's mum off.

Oh, she's been to her enough.

And then there's Max's mum, Daisy.

Is it still time for me to berate her at drop -off? I'll do it.

I've got a gold stat and this text has never been...

Sun raiser dress?

Right. You're in the nice brigade.

Just seeing if you've got my email about contributing to the end of your gift.

Yeah. You use too many emojis for a grown -up.

Okay, look, look, look, look. This light photo's been such an amazing feature

this year. Smiley face. Hot. But if you can't afford it, then maybe we can put

something else. Shrugging woman.

Oh, I can afford it. It's just that Max is going to St. Luigi's next year, so I

don't care.

Well, that's not really in the spirit, is it?

Perfect. Okay, you can stop with the cutesy emoji faces.

Look, I know it feels like a big deal to you, but it's not for me, because I

have a life outside of this school.

You should try it sometime.

I have a life!

That's good karma.

Kind of looks like an orchid.

Ish.

Cinema. I'm really looking forward to your dance today.

We've been practicing all time.

It's going to be awesome.

Ryan, how's my paper bouquet looking?

It's the best thing I've ever made.

I love it. Hit it.

Now put them all together. See how it looks.

And there's 20 of them. 20?

I might have enough for the bridesmaids.

Okay, what do you think?

Smart and thrifty or just cheap?

Um... I don't know what my own 50 means or cheat, so I'm just going to say good.

That's why you're my favourite.

What, nothing?

Well, we're not going to get anything from Daisy except mean words and a

disconcerting sense of failure.

I'll call her. No, I'll text her.

Hey, Zimzal.

Curified, eh?

The smoke machine's arrived.

Thank you very much, young man.

No problem, Cinnamon's mum.

You know, you can call me Fire Heather if you want.

No, thank you.

Daisy's blocked me.

Okay.

Well, Tristan's mum will be at the Room 3 mid -morning Christmas disco. I'll see

what she can do with the cash that we have.

Do children not like me?

I'm going to leave now.

Susan and Sue, so hopefully we'll have nearly what we promised. Oh, it's

fine. It's my first job.

I should be paying you an opportunity.

Oh, phew.

Yeah, because I'm trying to earn some sweet stick -a -bling, and this might

do it for me.

Well, I mean, I did have to get a teensy loan to start up my business, and I've

already ordered everything at my own expense, but just pay what you can.

You were too nice.

Yeah. I mean, Tristan will just have to get all his Christmas presents from his

dad this year.

I mean...

He makes it back from Bali in time. He's waiting to see if his girlfriend's

boobs get the green light for air travel.

Ah,

thanks for donating this. We usually don't hire such luxuries, but our year

end of year class concert and shared lunch deserves the very best.

My wife made me.

This is the Fogmaster 3000.

It's fairly idiot -proof and comes with a microphone with a little setting on

there. which makes you sound like a singing robot.

You should have a go.

It's very good fun.

I don't sing.

Everybody thinks.

Not if Miss Allison tells you you're too shrill and stand at three and makes you

mime the national anthem.

I'm just very lucky that it didn't deeply affect me in some way.

Seems like it did.

Kia ora, Freddie Junior.

Kia ora.

Here are room one's votes.

Whose idea was it to let the kids vote for the name of the new playground?

Jesus.

Sounds about right.

I think that Heather woman's going to be very pleased with the leading

contender.

You're telling me that the leading name for the playground we worked so very

hard to fundraise for, and is essentially our legacy, is what?

I've only collected half the votes, so it's just an indicator.

But it's most likely going to be called... Party McFartface.

It's out to rebuild it, and it's going to be called the Farty McFartface

Playground. Not all the kids' boats are around?

You said getting them to name it would be empowering and fun, and I'm feeling

neither of those things right now, Jess.

I guess now's not a good time to tell you that we need to pay Tristan's mum

we agreed upon, or her son's Christmas will be cancelled.

I'll cover the shortfall. How much have we forked out this year, Henny?

It's in the early hundreds, but Sue Ann's just transferred $12 .50, so it's

a teensy bit.

No. If I can't get Daisy to pay, I'll pay.

It'll just have to come out of my girls' night out fund.

A girls' night in is just as good.

We haven't earned the star yet.

Well, how about I talk to the principal and see if I can sort this catastrophe

out? I think I might know the Farty McFartface ringleaders.

Maybe I can change their minds.

My money's on here now.

Sorry, but we promised the kids they could name their own playground.

Wasn't it your idea in the first place? Who can remember?

I mean, you know what they want to call it, right?

It's less than ideal, but one of our school values is we listen to kids.

also promised Room 13 they could count the votes as part of their Maths is Kind

of Fun module.

So my hands are tied.

Well, hopefully Henny will have more luck with the ringleaders.

Thanks anyway.

Oh, uh... How was your movie date?

Man, I got stood up.

Oh.

Too bad.

How old are you?

Um, oh.

Are you behind Fadi McFartface?

Maybe. Well, it's pretty funny.

But you know the principal won't let it happen.

He promised to let us count the votes.

His hands are tied.

So if we win and he doesn't name it Fadi McFartface, he's proving that the

school just doesn't listen to the kids.

You make a fair point.

Thanks, Fadi.

Constable Chris.

Pavilion Jet.

Seen any good movies lately?

No. Have you?

No.

Cool. Cool. Great.

You know.

Great.

Knock,

knock.

Who's there?

It's Freddie from school.

Hey, um, can I borrow some stuff?

Yeah, what for?

I'm going to teach him a slobber lesson so he'll never forget.

Sure, go ahead.

So Mr Coffey is choosing respecting children over fundraiser feelings.

Well, those tweens do have a point.

I think they just chose another name.

I'm listening.

Well, he has only collected half the votes. We just need to convince the rest

the school to vote for something else.

The yay ground is coming second.

If everyone in room two votes for it, it might just win. We can lovingly but

firmly talk them into it at shared lunch.

I feel a gold star coming on. Oh, me too.

Are you coming to our shared lunch today?

Will there be cupcakes, Ryan?

Yep. Then count me in.

Are you looking forward to Ryan's song?

Wait, what?

Oh, it was supposed to be a secret.

He's singing your favourite Christmas carol.

After my dance troupe wows them with a routine they've been practicing all

He's a terrible singer.

That's not making him a bad person. No, he gets stage fright. Don't you remember

the Matsuriki disaster?

Cinnamon

made

these herself.

Oh, wow, yeah, you can tell.

Man, okay, I really need to talk Ryan out of singing.

And I've got to talk these kids out of fighting with fart face.

Our fundraising reputation depends on you, Hina.

Thank God.

Hey, feel free to reference me as Fire Heather.

Ho, ho, ho!

Ho, ho, ho!

Muta, kiti, muti, everybody. Thank you so much for voting.

What, you've already voted?

Can you take these to room 13 for me, please? Oh,

no, I'd much rather that the child do it. Thanks.

What does it look like I'm doing?

I'm plotting revenge on Miss Love for not giving my daughter a trophy.

Why? What are you doing?

Nothing.

Fair enough.

Oh, I need to talk with Daisy.

And oh, I need to talk Ryan out of singing. I'm struggling to make good

Daisy!

Last chance to contribute to the gift of the century?

Pah. But it's the nice thing to do.

So if I'm goody two -shoes will cover me, so I'm golden.

Much like the star I will never get.

No, no, no, no.

Have you seen Ryan?

Yeah, he's really cute.

Got a surprise for you.

Sorry, huh? Yeah, do you want to sit outside?

Don't go with him, Mr. I'll be plotting something.

Stay in your lane. It's fine. I'm going to murder you.

It's like the witness halo.

Don't go. I've got a nice feeling.

Do you like cinnamon cupcakes?

Have you tried them? No, I'm off sugar.

Now, the smoke machine is idiot proof, so you should be fine. Just one short

taste.

Okay.

Number one.

We've been working on this little dance all term as a visual thank you to Miss

Lightfoot.

Uh -oh, uh -oh.

from Ms. Lightfoot on behalf of all the parents.

So get up here, champ.

Yay!

Ms. Lightfoot, you have been such an amazing teacher this year. So we got you

some flowers.

But we know that your wedding is underfunded because teachers aren't paid

million dollars they deserve.

So we bought you your wedding bouquet.

And I'm making you wedding cake.

And I'm lending you my market.

Thank you so much, you guys.

And DJ Snazzy Jess will totally be your DJ.

So I've made all the kids trophies, so that no one misses out at prize giving.

And look, I even made you one, Miss Love.

That's really... nice.

Is there one for me?

I just said I made them for everyone, didn't I, Destiny?

Look, I'm sorry, Miss Love, I just can't feel... I've had enough of that.

I'm so sorry about the smoke.

I thought you'd thrown out a mat hat. Me too.

Luckily the President earned back the gold today he lost with the smoke.

Room 6 were so jealous.

I can lose stuff?

The Daisy pay up?

I'm covering her.

Let me get a photo of you enjoying Cindy's cupcake for my blog.

Anything for a gold star.

We have one last big surprise for you.

Ryan is going to sing for all of us.

It's no good. Your eyebrows look weird. Take a thicker bite this time.

I think you accidentally took my friend's Tupperware.

No, this is mine.

Is your name Hine?

That is an M, not a note. It just says mine.

Okay.

Look, lady, you cannot donate to a teacher's gift, and you can laugh at my

machine mayhem, but no one steals my friend's Tupperware and gets away with

Who cares?

I do.

Well, I'm going to take it anyway, because I know you're too nice to make a

fuss.

right here, Jess?

Bye, Heather. I'll be back.

I heard a kapapa. Is there going to be a fight? I'm making good choices, ladies.

Do you hear me, Tupperware?

Whoa. Not cool, Daisy.

You okay, Jess?

The problem with nice mums is we make a lot of nice mum friends.

Fine. Take the dumb thing.

Thank you.

Now there's the old Jess we know and love.

Thanks for backing me up, guys.

We finally know that's what we do.

I think that heroic mum act deserves a gold star.

And a girl's night out.

On me.

Merry Christmas.

Hey, is Marco around?

I think he's at the shared lunch for room two.

Dang, she wanted to meet Constable K -9.

Rough graffiti.

No, he's fake.

I hear your date with Jeff didn't go so well.

Oh, it didn't really go at all.

Yeah, she stood me up.

We were supposed to meet at the entrance to the Avenue Street Cinema, but I

don't know, she might have had second thoughts.

Yeah. It's kind of a shame, because, like...

Hey, I've kind of been in love with her since, like, Form 2.

Yeah. Yeah.

Anyway.

Aren't there two entrances to Avenue Street?

Sorry, what was that?

Nothing.

OK.

Wait.

I was saying, I think there are two entrances to Avenue Street Cinema. You

must have waited at different ones.

You should call her and sort it out.

That's some great detective work, Mr. Singh.

Thank you.

Oh, yes.

Did you know, Heather, Fadi McFartface was the leading contender?

I need to channel Alpha and let it go.

But Fadi and I talked to Room 13 and they came up with a better name.

Welcome to the junior programme.

I don't understand.

Well, we had a little chat about maturity and they agreed to vote for a

farty name.

You saved the day, Henny. And you saved Ryan's day.

And you saved my container.

Oh, I think we had a much better year this year, ladies.

Apart from the time we got covered in animal dung for EnviroWeb.

And the time that the dental nurse tried to steal your tooth after you

accidentally swallowed Ryan's.

I only remember the fun bit.

You never leave.