Original subtitles

Oh, cute.

Oh, no.

Pants.

Jump through the tops with pants attached.

The top.

No, no. They're pants with tops attached that cover the top. Must be your pantel

region.

Agree to disagree.

Disagree? How are we even friends?

Morena, lady.

Morena. Did any woman sign up to the roster?

No. Henny, would you put a jumpsuit in top or pants?

I'd put it in dresses.

Okay.

No.

It's term one and lost property is already smelling like it's term four.

Please collect it by the end of the day.

Oh,

hey, how many parent volunteers do we need for the fair this Saturday?

At least eight.

And how many have we got so far?

Three.

Hi.

Hi, Heather.

I love your outfit. Thank you.

What specifically?

The overall vibe.

Have you signed up to help on Saturday yet? I've got to go because I have to

leave.

I was invited to Ava's party.

Where's Ryan?

He didn't get one.

Ryan didn't get invited to Ava's party?

I'm surprised Ryan wasn't invited.

Ava went to Ryan's party, now that's the rules, right? Your kid goes to my kid's

party, my kid goes to yours.

Maybe they can't afford lots of kids at work.

Could be a numbers thing.

If it's any consolation, I never went to a lot of parties as a child and I

turned out perfectly fine.

Everyone likes Ryan, though, right?

Hey!

Heather.

Your hair's so shiny today.

Thank you.

I've upped my vitamin E and my folic acid intake.

Where do I drop secondhand books?

books in the library, clothes in the resource room, toys in the hall.

It's all in my email, along with the call -out for volunteers. Here's the

roster. Sorry, I've got to get to the library before it closes.

Hey, she's friends with Ava's mum, right?

Yeah, maybe I should make sure she gets to the library before it closes.

It comes up to my roster.

Hey!

Firstly, thanks to Heather and Henny for lending you.

Don't mention it.

Seriously, don't mention it. We're supposed to be helping sort for the fair

Saturday, so... There weren't enough volunteers, so we were involuntarily

volunteered again.

Class swimming starts today, and more importantly, the school pool keys go up

for sale.

So I need you to skim the leaves out of the pool. Mums like things tidy.

So what does pool key ownership entail exactly, in case Bob doesn't know?

It means you can use the pool after school or in the weekends or in the

holidays. For a small to medium -sized donation, depending on how much Margo

likes you.

Get all that, Bob?

Yeah.

Didn't you have a key last year, Heath?

I don't know. He'll take care of all of that.

Did I?

Yeah, the pool skin is in the shed.

Then count on us, Mr. C.

Got this.

Yeah. Hey, Heath!

Junkies, right?

Sorry, Bob.

Threw that with my left hand.

I'm way better with my right hand.

Should have used that one.

Probably.

Hey, hey, you're Ava's mum's friend, right? Yes, but I still can't sign up to

your roster for some reason.

Is money tight for them at the moment?

No, their family's love will soon explode. It must be a numbers thing.

then, is May going to Ava's party?

Of course.

When Ava came to her party, you know the rules.

Can I leave now? I've got to flop this to the library and then...

Do something else.

I'm alive.

Say bye to Heather for me.

Is it a laser tag party or something that requires even numbers?

The invite didn't say.

Did you get Maeve Mum to sign up to my roster?

No, she was running late for a fake appointment.

Look!

Justin's mum wanted to thank me for fundraising for the new flipper.

What, just you?

I said books in the library. It was in my school -wide email.

Do you think I should have used a pushier font?

No, no, that email was a work of art, you know. It was in that sweet spot

between passive and aggressive.

Is Ava's granny still in charge of books?

Oh, I'll take the books to the library and maybe have a chat with my best

Ava's granny about invites.

Actually, she pulled up at the last minute.

Oh, another one.

Are you going to tell Jess?

Nah.

Jessa's going to do what Jessa's going to do.

River, Brook and I will please report to the office to pick up your new

flippable uniforms.

Thanks for that, Edie. Real estate.

Well, all your real estate needs and requirements.

The school fundraisers said I had to say it, but they didn't say I had to mean

it. Oh, hi.

Hi.

Um, did you... Yeah, no, no. Oh, sure.

Is Ava's granny here?

I didn't need a chill, quiet word about party invite etiquette. No, I'm the only

person sorting books.

But I do have to leave soon.

It's common amongst our volunteers today.

Hey, can you give Kevin a lift to Ava's party on Sunday?

Kevin's invited.

Yeah, I'm as surprised as you are. I think she asked the whole class. No, no,

no, not the whole class.

Yeah, this is a numbered thing.

It's personal.

Is my son not as popular as they think?

William E. Winamoo and William, can you also come and pick up your new flip -a

-boy uniforms?

Thanks to Lahiri Real Estate.

Blah, blah, blah.

It's not good, Bob.

Never played underwater hockey.

Don't tell the other dads about this, eh?

Is that judgey at this school?

True that.

And actually good throwers.

Do you want to jump in? No. Neither.

I got it.

We need a volunteer to jump in.

Thanks a lot.

No, I mean someone now.

Fine.

Yeah.

Maybe I should text Ava's mum and casually demand to know why Ryan's not

but Kevin is. That's what I would do.

Can we focus on my roster, or as I'm rebranding it, the Awesome Parent Rotor

System?

All right, you could go ask her in person.

Asa's mum is one of the few mum volunteers left in the hall. In the

Run, yes, run!

Hey, Heather. I really enjoyed your latest blog post.

Someone has got to ask the big questions about why the way we learnt subtraction

is so wrong these days.

And who better than you?

Uh, secondhand books.

Books in the library, as per my email. Now, would you like to sign up for the

Awesome Parent Rotuses?

Oh, what's that?

It's a sign -up form for parents to help so fundraisers don't have to do all the

money. Oh, so it's like a rocker?

Kind of. Sorry, I think I believe that there.

Ava's mum. It's me, Ryan's mum. I know. Room three, soccer, and you live five

houses down the street.

Yeah, yeah. So I'm not worried, and it's totally not a big deal or anything, but

it looks like Ryan is the only one in the class that wasn't invited to Ava's

party, and I just feel like maybe it would be, I don't know, just a little

-destroying for the most important person in my life.

I'm confused.

So am I. I mean, why would Ava want Kevin and not Ryan? I mean, have you met

Kevin? I mean, he's like... No, I'm confused because she does have an invite

Ryan. I've already checked it myself.

He does? So he's not a complete social reject?

No.

Although, Ava must have decided not to give it to him for some reason.

So maybe he is a complete social reject?

He might be.

I can't believe Ryan's not as popular as I think he should be.

Does Ava not know what a good friend he is? Let's not overreact about the

invite. Let's focus on why parents are not signing up to the Awesome Parent

Road. It's a roster.

I know.

You think I should go talk to Ava about it?

Definitely. Not.

Heather, I saw Cinnamon's haiku about summer. So advanced.

So warm and sunny.

I love summer.

Don't you guys?

So, so, so sunny.

Wow.

Have you signed up for Saturday?

I thought if you donated stuff, you didn't have to volunteer.

No, it doesn't work like that. Bye, Heather.

You're the best.

Okay, okay, what is going on? Why are you so popular today?

Parents are finally appreciating me.

Took them long enough.

Gosh, it's quite nice being popular, isn't it? I see why you so desperately

crave it for your lonely son.

First break.

Jess, don't go and talk to Ava. I'm just going to go talk to Ava.

Jess is going to do what Jess is going to do.

We're her husband.

I don't know. Probably got lost again.

How's the free Paul Key poetry competition going?

Do you think it helped that I told the Tom and Icky that poetry is basically

just rapping?

No.

Also... Do you think it was okay to ask Heather to judge the competition?

I feel like she already does so much for the school. No, she's perfect.

Who's more judgmental than that Heather woman?

Shora, which class is swimming today?

Just out of interest.

Room three.

Joyce?

Both your kids are in room three. Shouldn't you already know that?

Henry deals with all that stuff, but you are right. We should definitely get

more involved.

Yeah.

Where's room three again? In between rooms two and four.

Poor key season is my least favourite season.

I hate bejeweled season.

Oh,

hey, Ava. It's, um, I'll just maybe come through.

Um, it may just rhyme, Mum.

I know.

Why was... I'm not always at school, Karma.

Just Thursdays.

And other times when needed.

Anyway, the point is, I'm here now.

And I just thought maybe, yeah, you could give me Ryan's invite, because

mum mentioned that you definitely have one for him.

Okay. Okay.

Huh. She was nervous to give it to Ryan in person, because he's so cool.

He is super cool.

You say super.

Let me have this, Karma.

Thank you.

Sweet. That is why you wanted to get into cryptocurrency now.

Oh, sorry, kids. Hang on.

My homies, what's up?

Mr. Lippity.

Mr. Lippity. Mr. Lippity.

Mr. Lippity.

Lippity.

It's fine. Can we borrow Brexit? Uh, no. Sorry, my dudes. He is picking up his

flip -a -ball uniform thanks to Rahidi Real Estate.

Is Cinnamon here? No, she's at handwriting for overachievers. Riding

Discount drum lessons.

Well, kids spend how many time in class these days? I know, it's so lit, right?

Yeah,

we need a kid with togs who's cool with secret missions.

Oh, I could lend you Albert. Is Albert cool?

Albert? No.

No, but he does have his togs.

Perfect. Albert, let's go.

Do either of you guys have a micro USB? My vape pen's run out of charge.

I don't understand what you just said.

Toy's in the wrong place again.

Sorry, I've got to leave early.

Party planning, etc.

Did Mum not read my emails?

No.

Is Edda around?

She's arguing with the caretaker about the true meaning of tidy.

Right.

Can you put in a good word for me?

She's judging the free Paul Key poetry competition, and I would very much like

my child to be seen to win it.

Oh, is that why everyone's being so nice to her?

Oh, mums will do anything for a free Paul Key in the prestige of a poetic

Even be nice to Heather.

So what happens when the competition's over?

Oh, everyone will go back to actively avoiding her like she deserves.

No offence.

Um, I've just got to go and have a corridor with Jess.

OK. OK.

Oh, tell her to say hi to Heather for me.

Okay. Okay.

Good, you bet. Let her relax.

Ava does want Ryan to go to her party.

My stress about history repeating itself is totally unfounded.

Go on.

I wasn't invited to Melissa Wong Tafu's slumber party when I was nine.

Kind of the worst thing that happened to me at primary school.

They watched Clueless and stayed up till 1am, allegedly.

I just never want Ryan to feel bad about not being liked.

Speaking of popularity, Molly's mum just invited me to join her walking group.

They are so brisk.

You know, Heather, when I was at school, popular group weren't very nice or

popular. Look, Heather, Ryan is invited to Ava's party.

So cinnamon.

Heather.

There are ten muffins left for you here from Luana's mum.

Sorry, I mean nine.

There are nine muffins left for you here from Luana's mum.

It must be an apology for her passing over the driveway mistake that I

thoughtfully pointed out yesterday.

It's really not cool to people who live near the school.

This is the best day ever.

I'm just going to take this invite to Ryan.

He's probably so worried.

Yo, where do books go?

Sorry, can you hold it closer? I don't have my glasses.

And I'm scared to put in contact.

Thanks for volunteering, Albert.

I'm volunteer, Bracken's dad.

None of us did, mate. Yet here we are.

So, we just need you to jump in, find the keys, and not tell any of the other

dads about it.

Is it cold?

Hard out.

Big Bob.

Should we be making a seven -year -old do something we're too scared to do?

Probably not.

Stand down, Albert.

I should be the one to jump in the stupid pool and get the bloody keys out

into the dumb shed and get the bloody pool skimmer.

Why don't we buy a cheap skimmer from down the road?

Come again?

Paula's Pool Parlour. It's just right behind my dad's dairy. But they shut it

once.

Thanks, Albert.

You're welcome, Cinnamon's dad.

Closer than ten minutes.

Wait, no running near the pool.

Gabby won't run for slippery safety reasons and because you're watching us.

By the way, Mum could have never let me unsupervised.

Guess what?

Ava does want you to go to her birthday party on Saturday. I tracked down Ava's

mum and then I spoke to Ava directly and to cut a medium story short, you're

welcome. I don't want to go to Ava's party.

You've got to be kidding me.

You sure you don't want to go to Ava's party?

I mean, don't you want to be one of the populars?

No. I'm going to Piper's party instead.

Oh, who's Piper again?

She's new.

And she doesn't have many friends yet.

She's kind of a straight talker.

Oh.

Is she the one that told me I need to put more effort into your lunchbox and

outfit?

Yeah. Her birthday's on at the same time as Ava's.

And I don't want Piper to feel bad on her birthday.

You're a real good friend, you know that?

You said it was one of the most important things I'll ever be... You're

up so fast.

Feels so.

Huh.

He only wants me to meet her in the study pocket.

Your friends are weird.

Yeah.

I love you.

Got it.

That's out. The fence is in.

I can't get there.

Can't get there. Where are you now? I'm out. You're there.

Why did you want to meet me here?

Well, I've had five kids.

I'm always here.

Hey.

Mums are only being nice to Heather because she's judging the free Porky

competition. But you think she's genuinely popular?

If anyone had told me in year one that I was going to be firstly called best

friends with Heather Maloney, I might have loved for her to pee a little.

But I genuinely love her.

How did you find out?

Molly's mum's kited about it.

Well, let's be good friends to Heather.

Let's go say mean things about Molly's mum's outfit.

As fun as that sounds, it might seem a bit childish.

Yeah. Yeah.

Fine. I'm going to speak to her like mature lady mum.

Paul is leafless as requested.

Is that a new?

Pool skimmer? Yeah, my treat.

We'd better get back to helping the missus.

No running, no running. You've made good choices.

Hey, I'm leaving early because I'm quite bored.

Not so fast.

Is Molly invited to Ava's birthday party?

Yes. Yeah, yeah, so is Ryan. But he's choosing to be awesome instead.

I don't know where he gets it from.

We need to talk about our friend Heather.

Aren't we a little old for pithy friendship feuds? We're not in primary

anymore. We are literally in a primary school.

I'm sure Heather can take care of herself.

Sorry to interrupt, ladies.

I can't join your walking group tomorrow.

Oh, that's a shame. We're going to rank the junior mum's drop -off outfits from

ugliest to most ugliest.

I know what you're doing.

When Cinnamon's dealing with mean girls, I tell her to shake it off and go hang

out with her real friends.

It's like a...

Wise wahine no one listens to.

And a woman child who tries her hardest with varying and limited success.

Fine.

Oh, and one last thing.

I love your shoes.

Oh, they look very...

Well, it looks like we'll be all working double shifts on Saturday.

Just once I'd like to enjoy a school event instead of working at it.

Oh! Oh, look.

It looks like this has maybe been sorted into the wrong box.

Right, Henny?

Right.

It is mostly pants, after all.

So you're not judging the free pool key poetry competition, I know how you love

to judge things.

I do.

I convinced Mr Coxhead he'd be more than happy to take over.

And I asked him a small favour.

Attention, children.

Please inform your families that the next five parents to sign up for the

-hand fare roster will receive a free pool key.

Thank you, Heather.

You're welcome, my friend.

Does that mean that I get a free school pool key?

No.

Roster!

Hey, babe.

Hi, babe. We're here to help. We've done it, babe.

Joy, think.

I mean, think.

Jess, you'd better RSVP that Ryan can't come to Ava's party. Yes, thank you.

Do you think that her mum will be annoyed with me because I made quite a

about getting him invited?

Yeah. Yeah.

Hard out.

is called the true story of the mighty mums in the bake sale from hell that

actually happened. I'm here to pick up the baking bonanza from our charitable

caregivers.

What's that?

This isn't a bonanza.

It's barely a nanza. It's a half nanza at best.

Luckily the other mums were super chill about it. This is the worst thing that's

ever happened either.

That's my mum.

Yeah, we know.

Oh, sorry.

Don't throw out the broken cups or use them for my mosaics.