Original subtitles

Do you sell cigarettes?

We don't carry them.

I'm sorry.

Out of cigarettes?

Yeah.

Thanks.

Ritual.

It's a ritual.

Oh, before? By the tracks?

Yes, I was performing a ritual.

Oh... sorry I intruded then.

What's it for?

It's a secret!

Do you know what tomorrow is?

No

Tomorrow's

my

birthday.

"Ritual"

I'm still swirling.

It's a dark, lonely place.

I thought you could maybe rescue me.

Somehow, I still feel that way.

Unsure what to do.

I'm moved by the scent of rain.

Thanks for those smokes.

And...

Happy birthday.

No!

Tomorrow's my birthday.

The simple act of pursuing her

was sufficient.

Having reached an impasse in my work and in myself,

I sought to acquaint myself

with everyday ennui, sired by apathy and restlessness.

Ever-fleeing the authenticity of my own experience,

I was entirely spent by a life,

composed of accumulated fictions.

Um...

are you always alone?

Not today.

Yesterday?

Not really.

Tomorrow?

I'd rather not be.

I'd rather not be alone either.

Say,

do you know today's date?

Monday.

Yesterday?

Sunday.

Tomorrow?

Tuesday.

Did you perform your ritual today?

Yes. It will make my wish come true.

Your wish?

When my wish comes true, I can disappear completely.

Disappear, leaving nothing in the world behind.

That's why I have to keep performing the ritual.

Until then, the red umbrella protects me.

Say,

what's tomorrow?

Can't you figure it out?

Tomorrow is my birthday.

And so...

I'd rather not be alone.

Um...

What?

Why did you follow me, that first day?

Why are you following me now?

Well... because you intrigue me.

Same here, then.

This your place?

Yup.

Here?

My unsound heart

and the consuming loneliness

of longing for someone.

Perhaps anyone will do.

As long as that someone

will love me

constantly, ceaselessly,

it will suffice.

"Is this true love?"

"I feel at ease with you."

"We're compatible."

I ponder such ideas everyday.

Sick.

Dad and Mom are sick.

Everybody's sick.

And I'm...

sickest of all.

What's wrong?

Maybe I shouldn't have come.

It's not that.

No one's stood there before...

I mean, it's unusual.

So I felt strange.

Strange? Do I look weird?

No, not at all. You look just right.

Like my room?

Probably.

I like it.

Because only my favorite things are here.

Including me?

Yup. You're one of the gang.

I'm OK here.

I like coming back here.

I'm home, mother.

Listen, your sister...

You listening?

She never listened to her mother.

It's too late for regrets now!

Listen to me, or you'll end up like your sister!

Both of you share that man's blood.

Guess it's hopeless.

I've had it! Where are you!

Not with that man again.

I won't stand for it!

Will you ever...

Pick up the phone and call me!

All right, all right, I get it.

I worked myself to the bone to raise you

and now you abandon me.

At least your sister had a heart.

How infuriating!

Listen,

you keep up this selfish behavior

and you'll pay for it.

I swear you will.

You, you, you...

How dare you talk to me that way.

Your father tortured me, doing whatever he wanted.

And now my own daughter hates me so much!

What's the point of living...

I'll get out of the hospital tomorrow,

and it's your birthday, too.

Please. Won't you come home.

Sure.

Know what tomorrow is?

Probably, your birthday, right?

That's right. So let's play together again.

I don't want to be alone on my birthday.

What are you doing?

Rainy days are days for my father and sister.

They're both dead.

And tomorrow's my birthday...

No doubt for her, the truth

is only an enemy that wounds her.

The days of her life pass in loneliness, a darkness without exit.

I longed to ease her sadness and anxiety, if only a little.

Even if only to atone for my own past.

Can I be with you?

Yeah

Know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow's your birthday.

The time is

5:59 AM

and

30 seconds.

The time is

5:59 AM

and

40 seconds.

The time is

5:59 AM

and

50 seconds.

The time is exactly

6AM.

The time is

6AM

and 10 seconds.

Good morning!

I'm going to

give you a tour of my house.

First,

this is,

the secret 4th floor.

And this...

This is Lucy.

The secret...

3rd floor.

And this is...

the secret

2nd floor.

And this is...

the secret

1st floor.

There's a basement

No!

That's absolutely secret! You can't go in there!

And this is...

the secret

5th floor.

And this is

the secret

What?

6th floor.

And this is

the secret

7th floor!

Why are they all secret?

Because...

They're our secret.

And finally...

This is

the secret

roof!

These... stairs... I'm beat.

Getting old...

You like high places?

Not really.

I do.

Sometimes, I come here to check.

Check what?

That I'm still OK.

The sky is pretty.

The stars are pretty.

The moon is pretty.

The light is pretty.

If I don't exist,

everything's pretty.

Maybe it's better if I didn't exist.

How about my blood?

Maybe it's pretty.

Maybe I'll look.

See, I'm still OK.

I didn't let go.

Still OK to be alive.

A blank-faced mosquito falls.

A huge mosquito.

Much, much bigger than I.

It slumps and is still.

A much larger creature caught it

and took flight, the mosquito in its grasp.

It flew up and passed right over me.

But it released its grasp and the mosquito fell.

Still blank.

It drifted down, down, down.

What's that?

The inside of my head.

Such an interesting head.

It's your turn

to talk.

About what?

Something

Something, huh.

Anything. I want to hear you talk.

You know FireMan?

No.

Well, when I was a kid,

he was like UltraMan.

His enemies attack him and in the end, he dies.

He ignites.

So he dies.

FireMan ends up burning.

He yells "Fire!" but actually he's afraid of fire...

Maybe he's FireMan 'cause he burns.

But that wasn't what you wanted.

I don't really get it, but it's interesting.

That's what she says, but I wonder...

Actually, all she wanted was to hear someone's voice.

Actually, all she wanted was to stop feeling lonely.

Know what tomorrow is?

Your birthday, right?

Echoes from the

creaking arcade roof opening and an all too ordinary sky

disturbed my ease.

Can I see you tomorrow?

If I'm still alive.

You like cars?

Not so well as boats and trains,

but well enough.

I like 'em.

Cars.

Why?

Because my big sister did.

Where were you?

I was back at the hotel getting my things.

That stuff.

No, I mean where were you 'til now.

I took my usual route here,

the bookstore, department store,

and the toy store today.

No.

I mean where were you before you came here!

Oh... Tokyo.

Why'd you come?

What? I wanted to think things over.

I was kind of tired.

Tough time?

Well, there was a lot going on.

But really, it was all about nothing.

You're just like my mother.

Mother always said life is full of tough times.

Must be a wrong number.

No cell phone calls today?

Yeah, the deal's already done.

What are you doing?

What? Nothing...

My usual work exhausts me.

So I'm keeping my distance.

Actually, I wanted to make live action films, too.

Live action films, films.

Films?

Films...

Why don't you? Why not? You should.

From now on, you're "Director".

I'll call you Director.

Director...

Cut it out.

Cheers.

I want blue, the blue one.

This? This blue?

Ready, go.

Hey, you cheated.

It stopped.

Say, say.

Say,

know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow? Tomorrow's your birthday.

You got that right,

Director.

I'm still OK today.

I'm finished.

Yes, yes, I start shooting today,

but there's no telling...

Yes, yeah.

An outline by...

Reel 1.

Rolling.

I'm rolling.

I'm shooting you.

Say something.

She seems to have escaped.

Does my outfit look OK?

Is it right for the film?

Sure, I think it looks fine.

I don't know much about clothes.

I'm not up on clothes.

It's cute.

Are you shooting...

It's moving.

Happy?

Happy on the train?

Happy on the train with you.

I've never been here.

The unknown.

Yeah, it's exciting.

The streetcar is a perfect means of escape from the tedium of my days.

The scenery flows by cinematically The sound effects are punctual.

My fantasy about her expands.

I won't be bored for some time.

Our idle routine, the days I spend with her, like a lukewarm bath,

her faint smile, all seem to agree with me.

Each day, a countdown towards death.

I dare not risk negligence.

All the more reason to film her, I think.

Images, especially animation,

simply embody our personal and collective fantasies,

manipulating selected information, and fictional constructs.

Even live-action film, recording actuality, does not correspond to reality.

Conversely, reality, co-opted by fiction, loses its value.

"The inversion of reality and fiction."

None of this matters to me anymore.

My consciousness, my reality,

my subject, all converge in her.

Certainly, she longs to escape into fantasy.

Certainly, I long to escape from fantasy.

I wanted to keep a visual record of these contradictory phenomena.

But, my behavior is really no more than an excuse

for my inability to communicate except through images.

This is the way to the mystery basement.

No trespassing Because the camera is prohibited,

I cannot show you anymore. Your pardon.

Outside circumstances

force me to omit the 1st through the 7th floors.

Next, the roof.

So, this is the roof.

Wow, it's high...

This is where she always

checks herself.

You know what tomorrow is?

Yeah, your birthday, right?

Each day, she postpones the morrow, by transforming today to yesterday.

A typical day in her life.

She never goes to sleep before dawn.

But awakening before 6AM, she dials and listens to the time

As far as I can tell, she hardly sleeps at all.

You'll die.

Hey, go to sleep!

Aren't you sleepy? Don't you want to sleep?

I'm scared to sleep.

When I close my eyes

and sleep, something really heavy seems to crush my head.

I push it away and away and away, but it keeps bearing down.

I can't avert my eyes.

And so I don't sleep.

I faint.

But I like tomorrow coming.

Because tomorrow...

You know what tomorrow is?

Your birthday, right?

Terrified to face the truth, she rejects even sleep.

Not that there is actual truth in the ambiguity of human memory.

Her best and only means of survival depends on her

destruction and renewal of memory.

Certainly many more days bear forgetting than joyful commemoration.

What is it that I want from her?

You'd better get some sleep You're shooting again tomorrow...

Again, today, I record her image.

Because I find in the act of capturing her being

according to my own will, for my own purpose, relief from my own life.

Images transform my real past into fiction.

Each of us edits and alters our memories.

By giving form and existence to this process through images,

I reinvent my past, whitewashing it,

into an idealized history.

Re-creating the present as something invulnerable,

as a world of fiction and fantasy.

We are the same. Only our methods differ.

Look what I found.

What's that, throw it away.

Do you read this stuff too?

No I don't.

I don't.

Liar.

I am not.

Why not?

Well, I read the softer stuff.

You do read it. Disgusting.

Like Playboy, or whatever.

"Females drowning in their lust, coming wherever they please..."

Don't read it.

"Normal sex doesn't do it"

Stop it.

"The nymphomaniacs who lust for kinky settings"

Cut it out. It's embarrassing.

Throw it away.

It's dirty.

You like this stuff too.

What can I say.

It says, vavoom.

No!

You like it.

No, they're too big.

You do like it.

Do you like sex?

Well, all men like sex.

And you, Director?

Well, the Director neither likes nor dislikes...

I don't dislike it...

So you do like it.

I don't like it.

'Cause if you do,

you're no more than male and female.

Just like everybody else.

So I hate it!

I really hate it!

A Kumoha 42 street car.

The type: 20 meters with driver's seat.

Two doors and benches on either side.

Semi-cross seats perpendicular to the floor.

Street car color, Grape #2.

Capacity 104, 68 sitting, 36 standing.

Weight: 45 tons. Built in 1933.

These two cars are the only ones of this type still operating in Japan.

Wait a minute.

Hello.

Yeah, in Ube.

Yeah, I'm shooting.

I can't tell whether it's any good or not.

I'll email you an outline when I'm done.

.Tell me what you think

Yeah, sounds good. Sure.

It's from a woman again. Dirty Director!

No, it's not like that.

Lucky you.

At least once a day you get to talk to someone.

It's not like that.

I don't care who it is. At least someone calls you.

Want it?

Give it back.

Here.

That night, her smile disappeared

with the falling rain.

Hey, you OK?

I'm coming in.

It'll rain tomorrow.

It'll rain tomorrow.

What are you doing!

Tomorrow's my birthday!

Today is

my father and sister's day.

I like rainy days.

Because when it rains,

all the merry people in the world finally walk with their eyes downcast.

That's why I like rain!

The rain she loves.

What she keeps bottled up on sunny days,

flows as from a broken darn when it rains.

Her feelings of loneliness. Sorrow.

These emotions elevate her,

preventing her from engaging in a certain behavior.

And...

engendering her complex reactions to the phenomenon called rain.

What is the sadness that she harbors?

No doubt the deaths in her family.

In this moment I acknowledge

yet again, that in her heart, she yearns

to cease existing.

A brand new

morning's here.

A morning of hope.

Open your heart with joy.

Look up at the sky.

Open your vibrant heart

to the song on the radio

to the fragrant breeze.

Now, 1, 2, 3...

I'm OK again today.

Having something to hold onto when you're scared

is good enough in itself.

And this is my

secret

ritual space.

It always has to be flooded.

It's a really sacred place.

But as of today, it's open.

The Director can come and go. Videocamera OK.

Not the other one?

This one's cooler.

An umbrella here.

Umbrella

Don't you need it?

As of today...this.

What's that?

A videocamera.

Matching.

Did you ever have fun?

A hesitant reply isn't a good sign, is it?

OK then...

A favorite place?

Favorite place... This sort of place isn't bad...

I loved the desert.

The desert?

Desert.

A simple place with only sand and sky.

Really beautiful.

But it was beautiful because it was unpopulated.

No humans there to warp it.

A beautiful world without people.

That sounds lovely.

Like railroad tracks?

What? Yeah.

Why?

Well...

How shall I put it... Because they are mechanical.

And then rails are fixed, right?

As long as you ride them you needn't choose a path.

Perhaps that's a relief.

And you?

I like them.

Why?

Because these two rails

will never come together.

And yet,

the two are one.

That's why!

They left me.

Abused and then abandoned.

I tried everything,

but my fear made me tremble.

The magical powers of a pair of dice

still sway me

undiminished.

If only one day I could say

I'm so glad I met you.

I hum to myself.

My umbrella! My umbrella!

If I died in your place...

How would the skies part?

How would the wind flow?

Beneath the steps of that dark red space

you used that sharp stick

and struck my bursting...

over and over...

It's no good, I can't write.

Hopeless.

Maybe time to give it up.

What'll I do if I quit?

What do you think I'd...

Oh, sorry. I'll call you back.

Hey, what are you doing?

Today, she didn't venture near the roof,

or to the railroad tracks.

She never attempted to leave the room.

Tomorrow's my birthday.

Tomorrow's my birthday.

Be happy.

Be happy.

She never discussed what frightened her,

what she wanted to escape.

She no longer saw anyone but herself.

I no longer exist inside of her.

That day passed without our exchanging a single word,

a single glance, or lifting the camera to shoot.

For I hadn't the courage to capture her like this.

Her unrelenting oppressive reality

began to bear down on me as well.

Unbeknownst to me, she had found a cat that day.

Look mother, isn't this cat cute?

It's called Jam.

Look, it's mother, mother.

Our very, very kind mother.

Let's say hello to her, Jam.

You know what tomorrow is?

Tomorrow...

is my birthday.

Her ritual remained interrupted.

Since that day, she hadn't climbed to the roof, or visited the tracks,

but played with the cat all day.

Playing with the cat seemed to allow her to avoid herself.

She still slept rarely, and now barely ate,

only played with the cat.

Nothing else worth recording took place.

Except that of course we neither spoke nor exchanged a glance.

I remained locked outside her.

Here, Jam!

Why don't you come?

The cat slipped away that day.

The photographer's dream.

The writer's soul.

The director's obsession.

The actor's disease.

Red cheeks.

Swelling lips.

Tightened strings.

The human heart is fragile

and is easily captured.

An evil song

drifting through the dark

envelopes the girl.

You can eat this.

Announcing,

My true mother's arrived.

The girl dances

wildly, wildly

wildly.

She never did come home that day.

And suddenly,

I noticed that I was somewhat relieved the cat had gone.

Um...

the cat?

Mother.

My mother was inside me.

I've become my mother.

Cut it out!

What are you doing!

Cut it out!

Calm down.

Why! Why weren't you with me then!

Why!

Calm down!

Calm down!

It's your sound.

It's beating away.

A gentle sound...

I've never heard it before...

Don't go anywhere, OK?

Don't disappear like that, OK?

Don't ever leave me alone again, OK?

Promise.

Because tomorrow's my birthday.

Sure... OK.

You have to be

with me on my birthday.

Forever and ever, OK?

What are you thinking?

What? Oh, sorry.

For real!

Hey, hey, wake up! Wake up!

It's past 6.

No... hold on...

Don't climb.

Up we go.

Yup.

OK?

Your heart says I'm OK.

There... there...

Which line today?

Amusement park.

I can handle this.

Sorry, there's someone scary.

Director! Monkeys!

Monkeys and goats.

I made a huge discovery this morning.

Guess what?

I'm not scared to fall asleep anymore.

Just because you were with me,

I could close my eyes just like that.

And like,

I wasn't scared at all.

Nothing came crashing down.

Actually, my body felt really light.

I could just sleep.

This is amazing!

This is really amazing Do you understand what this means?

Amazing discovery!

Really.

Great angle.

The wind's not so bad when I lie like this.

You're right.

Cuddling is nice, isn't it? I like it.

Yeah.

In a way, I like this better

than that.

Don't believe you.

No, really.

Huh, well then,

what do you like about it?

That it's warm.

It's warm...

For me,

when I wake up in the middle of the night,

you're beside me.

Your face is right there.

It's so reassuring. Amazing, isn't it?

I know what you mean.

But your mouth's

always wide open and you drool.

You... fool!

Ouch!

Can you make it?

All these used tires

look like people's ex-teeth.

Let me shoot too.

OK? I want to shoot, too.

No, it won't be my film anymore.

Who cares, c'mon.

Let me, let me.

This? This OK? Is it working?

Give it back.

Say something.

Don't shoot me.

Why are you upset?

I'm not upset.

Liar.

It's true.

Do I look upset?

You do.

I am not upset.

I wonder...

I'm tired lately.

Tired?

Huh, I see.

So what!

Want me to mother you?

Yes, please.

OK, good boy, good boy.

I'll mother you more.

Will you mother me then?

I want a piggyback.

Piggyback?

Yeah, piggyback.

For real?

A two-shot.

I'm dizzy.

Dizzy.

Know what tomorrow is?

Sure.

That's right,

tomorrow's my birthday.

Tomorrow's my birthday.

Tomorrow's my birthday.

Tomorrow's my birthday!

It's nearly a month since I met her.

I'm fed up with the endless "yesterdays",

and lulled by the "todays".

Anxious, too, that tomorrow may bring change

yet eagerly awaiting the change it may finally bring.

What do I want from this reality I share with her?

The constancy of the past or the change of the future.

However,

these were no more than idle doubts that shifted with my moods.

You snore every night Sounds just like a hedgehog.

These days will come to an end Eventually, I'll part with her.

Even my life will end one day.

All the more reason to treasure these slight, fleeting emotions.

But the excess of boredom and the excess of intimacy

were simply exhausting me.

And I realized that gradually the times that being with her

depressed me, outstripped the times

that I enjoyed it.

Someday that'll happen to me.

You know, today,

there was this blue car

in front of the shrine,

and this car, you know,

was really cute...

Hey, you listening? You listening?

I've gotten really good.

Oh, it stopped.

I'm off to the store.

He hates me?

Hates me?

He hates me.

Hates me, hates me, hates me!

I'll be left alone again.

I'll be left alone again.

They left me.

Abused and then abandoned.

I tried everything

but my fear made me tremble.

The magical powers of a pair of dice...

...still sway me.

If only one day I could say,

I'm so glad I met you.

I hum to myself.

Listen, your sister...

You listening?

She never listened to her mother.

It's too late for regrets now!

Listen to me, or you'll end up like your sister!

Both of you share that man's blood.

Guess it's hopeless.

I've had it! Where are you!

Not with that man again.

I won't stand for it!

Shut up, clueless!

You're so patronizing!

All you ever want is for me to be grateful!

Always, always, always.

You're just patronizing me!

You don't even have a clue

what it is I really want! Not a clue!

How dare you!

You only remember what you gave me,

but not how. you mistreated me

Right?

Or what, we're even-steven for all your troubles?

Go ahead and die! I won't care!

Shut up, shut up, shut up!

Why were you nice to me then?

Mother...

Why don't you answer?

Why don't you answer?

Her heart is overcome by a world

awash in cruelty, harshness, hatred and loneliness.

But that is the way of the world.

Each of us fears its absurdity, and curses it.

And yet, the world is immeasurably vast,

and gentleness, mercy and empathy linger in our hearts.

I desperately wanted her

to know this reality as well.

Hello...

Hey, there.

What's wrong.

But her heart is so delicate, so vulnerable.

Am I really capable of embracing

the endless darkness inside it?

Perhaps I'm incapable of accepting her...

I find myself enveloped in an anxiety I cannot shake.

Today, again, I can do nothing.

6 in the morning, she's back to her usual self

She's returned to her little world

constructed entirely

of her protections, denying the existence

of whatever can harm her.

Except now she has chosen to rely on me.

Yeah, it always sounds good.

She begins another day of life, brimming with fantasy,

plastered in self-deception, sealed by oblivion.

My own faint panic, "I've got to do something"

is futilely idle.

What are you doing?

Nothing, work.

Let's go outside then.

Shoot your movie, that's your job, right?

Is that work?

It is your job.

In Japan today, all forms of expression,

beginning with images, serve only

as either

time-killing entertainment for those without occupation,

or as momentary respite for those who are afraid of pain.

People desire either real scandals amplified into rawness,

or,

the illusion of beautifully adapted fictions.

It is true of me.

Unable to create appropriate relationships.

I escape into a fictional world, constructed on a fantasy of daily life.

Even this film, when completed,

will become a device to deliver a certain amount of stimulation.

Devoid of surprises, and a measure of time spent in peace.

Who wants images beyond that? Who needs them?

By then, I had abandoned her as a visual construct.

I didn't want to film anything.

As long as she was present, I didn't need to make a film.

I had always been entranced with the idea of

being madly loved, and loving madly.

And yet this was a stupendous burden, exhausting.

Could I really bear it?

Long time...

So you were back.

Hey, wait!

Wait, dammit!

What's that about?

I gotta go.

Hey, don't bother.

I said wait! Hey, hey!

Give it back, I know you've got it.

Hey! You do, right!

No, I'm not my sister!

You're crazy!

Excuse...

You OK?

Hello.

Sorry about that...

A reunion? Right now?

A toast to his triumphant return!

You forgot, right?

Oh... Sorry, sorry.

Where were you?

And you?

Where were you!

With some woman?

No, what are you saying?

I was out drinking with my old friends.

Liar, liar.

It's the truth.

Liar.

And where were you?

Liar!

I'm not lying. It's the truth.

There's nothing left.

Nothing but your heartbeat.

Ever kissed someone?

I have.

Maybe I haven't ever.

Have you ever killed someone?

No...

Maybe.

In my head.

Me too.

You want sex?

If I have sex with you, will you stay forever?

Actually, you like it, right?

Much better than cuddling.

You just put up with that, right?

You want to see and touch my breasts, right?

Then, have sex with me.

But don't go anywhere.

Don't abandon me.

I'll do whatever you ask.

Don't hate me.

Don't start hating me.

Ouch.

No, no!

If I do this, I will become my sister...

I'll become my sister!

I'm... Still...

If I died in your place.

How would the skies part.

How would the wind flow.

Beneath the steps of that dark red space

you used that sharpened stick

over and over

striking my

quivering lips

swollen to bursting

tasting

of sorrow and betrayal.

That song

has left me.

I peer back again and again

at that dreamlike state.

Oh, hello. Sorry, I'll call you back later.

Hello.

How unusual. Calling at this hour.

Cat got your tongue? Hello, hello...

What are you...

Come to bed.

You read this?

Why...

What'd you think?

Why?

It's your movie.

Because you have to?

Are you with me because you have to be for work?

No, that's not what I meant.

Just like my father?

Just like my sister?

Just like my mother?

It doesn't matter if you don't like it.

Am I worthless?

Do you hate me?

Are you going away?

Tell me you won't. Tell me you won't.

That woman on the phone...

You were just tempted when she called you, right?

What woman? She's nobody...

Irrelevant...

I can't hear you.

I can't hear your heartbeat.

There's one answer.

Two answers.

Three answers.

How many answers?

What makes you like this...

By 6 that morning, she had disappeared.

Are you a friend of my sister's? You dating her?

Well, yes, something like that.

Huh... That girl got a boyfriend...

Oh, sorry.

I never thought she'd do it.

Her sister appeared instead.

Finally, she'd rejected even herself.

It's none of my business, but be nice to her, OK?

Come to think of it, she always liked this kind of place.

I feel sorry for her.

Parents split up when she was young,

Father walked out on both of us.

Wound up dead with the new woman.

Did it rain on that day?

No, in a fire.

A fire?

Yes, on her birthday.

And, your mother?

A streetcar hit her.

On her birthday, she'd always cry, Why did they leave me?

Our mother was a terrible person.

She blamed anything bad on someone else.

It was Dad's fault,

that woman's fault,

my sister's fault, my fault, the world's fault.

It never occurred to her the fault might be hers.

My poor sister. She was always compared to me.

She only heard nagging "Why can't you be like your sister?"

It was like she was no good.

She must have suffered.

I wonder how she'll ever learn to like herself.

There's someone I'd like to see. Coming?

None of your business, butt out.

You...

New guy, huh... Must run in the family.

Listen, cut the crap.

You only show up when it suits you.

What's with that face? Same as last time?

Seen my cat?

Listen, you...

My cat, my cat, you know, Jam.

No I don't. How the hell would I know?

Liar, liar, liar, liar...

You deny attacking my little sister, too?

What are you talking about? You are her, not her sister.

No I'm not.

Your sister went away a long time ago.

You ranted about killing her.

I say I'm not.

You were babbling some crap about how you killed her.

No...

You do this to me all the time.

You ask me to let you stay 'cause you got nowhere else,

then you split.

Now it's about some cat!

You come wandering back ranting about a cat!

Don't mess with me!

Say something!

Goddammit!

After all I did for you!

You don't get it, do you!

What an idiot.

Don't ever go again.

What the...

What the...

I'm...

Oh, great.

Being with you makes me crazy.

Drives me nuts.

You're crazy.

Demented. Both of you.

Wanna be like your sister. Well you already are.

Sleep around, get knocked up,

spitting image of that sister you love.

Huh!

I'm sick of you both.

No...

No...

No...

Crazy, right?

Hey,

you pulling the same, "Go away" crap on him?

Sister!

Sister! Sister!

Your sister used to say...

"My own sister scares me".

Don't! Don't!

Why does it always have to be so damned dramatic?

Forget it. Give me back the ring, the ring.

Don't touch me!

What!

How dare you "All I did for you" me!?

You never did a thing yourself!

My sister did everything!

Who do you think you are!

I've had it with you!

Stop...

Spit it out! You!

Please stop.

Give back the ring!

Who you callin' stupid! Who doesn't get it!

Calm down.

Let go!

I've had it!

Go away!

Get out of my life!

Give me a break.

Sister, why were you with that guy?

That guy...

After you disappeared,

he came after me.

Why did you have to go away?

But it's too bad.

You pretended to like me, but you didn't.

So God punished you.

Be happy. Be happy.

Be happy.

Hello.

Be happy. Be happy.

Be happy.

You had a phone call.

Who?

It was...your mother.

No...

She's still alive.

I gotta kill her.

It's not true, 'cause she's dead.

It's not a lie.

She's coming to see you tomorrow.

Tomorrow? What for?

Don't know... Maybe she's worried about you.

After all that?

After all...

She calls you all the time.

Why'd you answer my phone?

Keep out of my business!

I'm sorry. But it's what's best for you.

Liar!

I'm not lying.

Liar!

Go away! You go away, too!

Don't run away!

I'm not running!

You run away from everything you don't like, and wind up

in your own little world.

Not true!

You just deny anything you don't like.

Not true!

That's why you want everyone to go away!

Shut up! Cut the crap! You depress me!

Why are you still here? I told you to go...

Because I...

want to be with you.

I...

like...

you...

Lies!

It's true. I like you.

You're lying just like everybody else.

I like you.

Liar!

I like you.

I like you.

I like you.

Why are you so nice to me?

I wonder...

Let's go home.

When I was little, my mother cursed my father

to drive him away.

Mother's curse came to pass

and my father left.

I tried hard

to keep her from driving me away.

But she told me,

even though she never told my sister.

It was my birthday.

A red umbrella and red shoes.

My mother bought them for me when we went shopping together.

The first things that weren't my sisters hand-me-downs.

They matched my mother's.

But my mother threw them away.

She called them old. She didn't need them.

When I saw that,

I thought, she'll do that to me one day.

I'm scared of being alone.

But I'm scared of mother, too.

So I cursed everyone to drive them away.

The curse will come to pass on my birthday.

So my birthday always has to be tomorrow.

But mother didn't go away.

So I had to kill her in my head, over and over.

But suddenly,

I realized that I had to leave.

So I began dressing up.

Tomorrow

would bring my

new and happy life.

But I don't know

what to do about tomorrow.

You never know about tomorrow.

All we really know,

is that tomorrow we'll still be together.

What do you say?

Want to try to see your mother?

You've been OK?

You've been OK?

Leave me alone.

I can't leave you alone.

But you did.

Your own mother leave you alone?

For a long time.

I left you alone for a long time?

When did I leave you alone?

When did your mother leave you alone?

Ever since I was little,

you always left me alone...

You only cared for my sister.

Excuse me.

Did her sister pass away?

Is she still alive?

We are apart, but...

She worries about you, too.

She called me the other day.

We'd been out of touch.

I'm sorry, it's not that.

I left you alone.

I was so busy thinking...

about myself, that maybe I didn't think about your feelings.

Maybe I was difficult for a long time.

Maybe I was no good.

Always complaining, always getting angry.

Maybe I never did anything for you.

Maybe I only...

thought about myself.

Maybe I couldn't really love you.

Now...

What?

I really want you to come home.

I know it's selfish...

I'm lonely.

I know that's selfish of me.

What about when I was lonely?

What about all those years when I was lonely!

All those...

You couldn't have cared less when I needed your love,

but now you're lonely, you come to get me!

I'm sorry, I'm sorry.

What! After all this time, now you're lonely!

Is that what it is?

That's how it is...

That's how...

When I was lonely,

you just ignored me...

Now you...

Go away! I'm asking you, go away!

Just go... Just go...

Just go away, now!

I'm sorry.

No!

I'm sorry, sorry, sorry.

I'm sorry I'll be waiting

Just once, won't you come home?

Won't you come home just once? Please.

I know...

Please come home...

I'm sorry.

Mother!

Wake up from your dream?

Or is this part of your dream?

Are we still dreaming a dream?

But this is our reality... Your reality.

Your birthday

will come, on the day

you were born.

Smile,

please smile.

Thank you.

What day

is that?

December 7th.

My birthday.

♪ The red hair I got from my mom ♪

♪ Braided in two ♪

♪ Swaying in the wind ♪

♪ Why, why, I still don't know ♪

♪ Calmly I stood up ♪

♪ Scissors in hand ♪

♪ and cut off those braids ♪

♪ It was a sunny day ♪

Shunji Iwai

♪ The future had no meaning ♪

Ayako Fujitani

♪ I was helpless, had no words ♪

Jun Murakami

♪ But the scent of the way home ♪

♪ It was tender ♪

Shinobu Otake

♪ I can live ♪

♪ Somebody was laughing ♪

Suzuki Matsuo

♪ It was a very sunny day ♪

Megumi Hayashibara

Chief Executive Producer: Yasuyoshi Tokuma

Executive Producer: Toshio Suzuki

♪ With no more hair ♪

Based on the novel, "Touhimu" by Ayako Fujitani

♪ I cut off my arms ♪

Cinematographer: Yuichi Nagata

Production Designer: Yuji Hayashida

♪ Dancing, with my bloody arms ♪

Sound: Yasuo Hashimoto & Kazunori Shimizu

♪ Without you ♪

Editor: Souichi Ueno

♪ there was nothing here ♪

Costume Designer: Sachiko Ito

Hair and Make-up Designer: Isao Tsuge

♪ but only the bright sun ♪

Composer: Takashi Kako

♪ It was a very sunny day ♪

Theme Song "Raining"

♪ Couldn't even cry ♪

Written, composed, performed by Cocco

♪ The land had no limit ♪

♪ Beauty surrounded me ♪

♪ I was singing ♪

♪ in a white dress ♪

♪ The line of people far away ♪

♪ I could've cried with a rain like today ♪

♪ It was a sunny day ♪

♪ The future had no meaning ♪

♪ I was helpless, had no words ♪

♪ But the scent of the way home ♪

♪ It was tender ♪

♪ I can live ♪

♪ Somebody was laughing ♪

♪ It was a very sunny day ♪

A Tokuma Shoten Production

Producers: Nozomu Takahashi & Miyuki Nanri

Written and Directed by: Hideaki Anno