Original subtitles

Hey, it's garden open day.

- Oh yes? - Come and earn your keep for a change.

No, i'm practicing for our neighbor's clay shoot.

Honestly, you never lift a finger to help, you spend money like water,

Drink like a fish, and eat your body weight three times a day.

That, sir, is what makes me a gentleman.

- Pull! - ( gun fires )

Hang on, isn't that our dinner service?

There are no clays, mr. Scrooge, and anyway...

"crown derby" is seldom seen in the best houses these days. Pull!

They're all chipped. I found them in an outhouse.

And while we're on the subject of penny-Pinching—

You haven't spent your pocket money already, have you?

It's only tuesday, now you want to touch me for a tenner?

- Forget it! - Here.

- Where are you off? - To get the royal worcester.

Nice to meet you. Straight through there.

Hello. Hello, how are you?

Hello, what was your name again? That's right, nice to see you.

How are you? How do you do?

Hello, how are you? Nice to see you.

Oh, stuff it.

That's four more yesses.

That's everyone within a radius of 60 miles

Who's vaguely posh and can still grip a firearm.

It's the lowest form of wit, lucy.

( sniffs ) the unmistakable aroma of competing males, don't you love it?

- Eww. - Paul bowman?

Your neighbor. The laird of glenbogle.

I know who he is, lucy. But can he shoot?

Morning.

Moira mclver?

- Oh, my dear girl. - I never expected to find you here.

You haven't changed at all.

Since we were 16? I rather think so.

And here you are.

It's...

It's wonderful to see you.

I came only to see the house again, donald macdonald!

Ooh...

Less and less turn up every week.

I mean look, that's my dance class.

Maybe you're just expecting too much too soon.

Come on, boys, let's sort those feet out.

One, two, three, four,

Five, six, seven, eight...

One, two, three, four, and one, two, three, four...

Please don't rush off, moira.

Let's at least spend a little time together,

Just for old time's sake?

We could walk down to the loch,

Or go and see the walled garden. Remember?

I must say, donald,

I think it's marvelous that you can pick up just where we left off

- As if nothing ever happened. - Water under the bridge, and that sort of thing.

- Can't we let bygones be bygones? - As simple as that?

Well, we're here now, and with the whole day before us.

Why dwell on what we can't alter?

I chose to be a ghillie, ewan.

It's not the kind of job where you're likely to bump into the love of your life.

Become a d.J., because i'm fighting them off.

Your dad's hit the jackpot.

I'm not saying i'd like to wait that long.

- What do you go for? Looks or personality? - Both.

Jess, you know i'm tantalizingly out of reach.

Personality, then.

So, he looks like his face caught fire

- And somebody put it out with a shovel. - No!

He'd have to be decent-Looking.

Kind, attentive, a steady kind of guy.

And a great kisser.

- You'll get one easy. - Yeah, how?

Oh, it's sore, isn't it? Poor wee thing.

Morning, then.

- Morning. - Great day to be outdoors, isn't it?

You're a long way from home.

Yeah. How are you then?

I'm better than my pony.

Aww. Call the vet?

Good idea, but they often want paying.

I will if i have to.

Is that it then?

No.

And a dozen highland cows.

- Organically raised. - ( groans )

There's a livery stable too.

Staff?

( laughs ) no, just me.

Most of the land goes for grazing,

The rest for vegetables i sell locally. I make a living.

My old man, bless him, all his life he sold chickens.

30-Odd a week at a quid each.

20 years later, i was still charging a quid each,

But i was knocking them out a half a million a week.

He made a living, i made money.

- So what about you then? - What do you think?

Too early to tell. No, i tell you what,

You let me take you out to dinner tonight,

In the name of research.

- Morning, your lairdship. - Good morning.

Ought i to dismount and curtsy?

I'm not very good at subjugating the peasants.

You're pretty nice to kiss for a toff, i must say.

Kissed a lot of toffs, have you?

You have to, until you find the one that turns into a real live frog.

And i thought you didn't believe in fairy tales.

I'm young. I can mend my ways.

I'm also a stranger in these parts.

Well, don't be.

If we're to be neighbors, we must get to know each other better.

Should we start with dinner tonight then?

Um, fine.

Good. You can pick me up at 8:00 if you like.

Ta.

Cheers.

What's this?

Spicy relish. My gran's recipe.

- What, you make it? - Mm-Hmm.

May i? I'll pay you for it.

It'll cost you.

Ta.

That's exactly what i'm talking about.

What are you doing for marketing?

We're doing fine. Thank you for asking.

I'm amazed to see it's still standing.

Yes, only just.

- Here it is! - What?

"d.U.M. Plus m.M. Equals true love."

Donald ulysses. I thought it a name fitted for adventure.

I don't think i could have even found gretna green.

It was just a name in those days.

I hope you didn't take it too much to heart.

I was only 16, in love.

A silly farmgirl in that little white dress

With the pink rosebuds and the matching gloves;

And those sandals,

Patent, with a single strap and little gold buckles.

So impractical.

No, donald.

I've hardly thought about it from that day to this.

They'll take 50 jars as a trial.

It's hardly m&s, is it?

It's a tourist trap. All the coach trips stop there.

Plus it's a local trader who we should be supporting.

Please, we should be supporting isobel.

Me, i'd be aiming a little higher than the local corner shop.

Well, we're happy to build slowly.

It's not the pyramids, paul, it's chutney.

Hit the market aggressively and immediately. I have the capital—

With all due respect, chester, this is rather up to us, "glenbogle spicy relish."

Nobody cares as long as it's got a tartan bow on the top of it!

What you don't seem to understand—

My gran, my relish, my decision.

All that time we were courting,

- And i never once set foot inside the house. - Not by my choice.

I daresay i'd have trailed in mud,

And used the wrong knife.

You know what they were like.

Your family? No, no, i don't.

You'll recall we never met

Although you always had a welcome from mine.

How is the farm these days?

- The farm? - Yes.

- You really haven't been there since? - No.

I imagined that at some point you'd have made an effort to find me.

I was away a good deal.

And what an exciting life you've led!

Yes, but you mustn't believe everything you read in the newspapers.

And farming, in its own way,

Must be just as interesting.

Fancy your never having been to the farm in all these years.

- You really should. - Oh.

Then to follow, scones, raspberry jam,

Some clotted cream— cornish if you can—

Then biscuits, get a selection.

A cake, dundee, naturally. Got all that?

It's a working house, not the savoy.

Is this for that lady i saw you with earlier?

Moira mclver, an old and true friend,

Who, incidentally, is quite happy to accept me for who i am

- Without trying to change me. - I'll take it she's the local saint then?

Her family farmed kilcairn cross for generations. She's carrying on the tradition,

And from what i can glean, quite alone.

Hey, you're still under a curfew order.

So don't think you can go out dating...

Unless you take me along.

Wouldn't you be better off with a business loan?

It's a personal gamble and i don't want to involve the estate.

If it's personal, perhaps you'd be better

Not mixing it with business at all.

No, not that kind of personal.

She's a tenant, that's all,

And i want to make an investment,

And someone else is showing an interest.

Are you finding it a wee bit warm in here?

If she goes with me— my input... My—

My investment, i'll need a lump sum up front.

Well, we like to help our customers whenever we can, but...

Sorry, i love doing that. Power mad, me!

No, the money's available if and when you need it,

And good luck with your investment.

( chuckles ) thank you!

Jewelry is the way to a lady's heart, ewan, make a note of it.

I'd take the price off because no bird's gonna put out for a quid.

1.99.

Oh!

Where's your cap then? Not in your hand, is it?

You're not scared of a little competition, are you, chester?

Look, if you fancy the woman, please say so,

But just drop all this entrepreneur stuff, eh?

- I'm supporting a local business. - Don't you mean the bank is?

I bring a lot more than money, chester.

Let me guess... Local knowledge?

It can be useful. For example,

You're parked right under where the starlings perch.

All right, boys.

And it's time for a special competition with a great prize.

- And tonight, it's one for all you guys out there. - ( soft music playing )

One very special guy could win the rob roy radio dream date.

She's gorgeous, she's a ghillie, and she's all girlie.

And lads, she's looking for a great kisser.

He will be kind, sensitive, a steady kind of a guy.

And he won't look like someone sat on his face while it was still wet.

If that's what's staring back from your mirror,

You could be on your way to rob roy's dream date.

You know the number. Get dialing.

- There we are. - Thank you.

Izzy! This is nice.

Lucy, and paul. Great.

We said we were gonna see more of each other.

- Evening. - Hi.

- Isobel. - Paul.

- Evening, paul. - Dougal.

Oh, let's not bother with menus when paul can advise.

You don't need me to order for you.

Who else? Unless this local knowledge isn't all it's cracked up to be.

Okay. The venison's good.

- Chester: safe bet. - When it comes from my estate.

- Lucy: touche. - To start, the duck.

- Shoot it yourself? - Golly.

Gosh.

I find the countryside really, really interesting.

In fact, you're probably not going to believe this,

But my favorite film, my favorite ever film

Is actually "the lion king"!

Maybe we can place our relish here.

It's not our relish yet, paul, remember?

He can't stand losing, paul.

Something you'll find out at his "social" clay pigeon shoot.

It's not about winning or losing, it's about what's best

For isobel and her excellent product.

We've had an order placed by the local shop, which we're going to honor.

Fine. After that it's a clean slate.

Could i be included in this conversation?

Of course, isobel, sorry.

So which is it to be, paul's well-Meaning d.I.Y. Approach?

- D.I.Y.? - Or my proven track record of making lots of money?

Can't we find a way that you can both be involved?

I don't think that will work, somehow.

No, we need the clarity. One or the other.

Great, thanks. That way i'm bound to offend one of my neighbors,

One of whom happens to be my landlord.

There is a way out of this.

We can shoot for it.

- Oh, goody, a duel! - Clays, lucy.

The stage is set.

My clay shoot's only a couple of days away.

I can introduce myself to highland society

And at the same time, win myself

An investment opportunity. What do you say?

I can't imagine it's what isobel would want.

Okay, fine. Look, we'll deliver the order and call it quits.

Chester's far better qualified than i am.

I rather fancied the shootout myself. What do you say, isobel?

I say let the best man win.

- Brilliant. - Are you sure?

Excellent! Nice sport— stakes, guns,

Maidens' favors. I'm quite overcome.

My interests include

Fighter aircraft 1939 to present day,

And i'm a keen metal detectorist,

Which is, incidentally, the correct term.

Um, what more can i tell you to interest the young lady?

How do you spell "detectorist"?

- Food okay, chester? - Yeah, fine.

Would you excuse me?

I don't believe it.

- You want me to get it? - No, it's fine.

You haven't got your wallet. I'll get it.

- No, it's fine. - I'm sorry, paul!

New barman. I'll place this on the laird's account.

Obviously this is ridiculous and completely out of hand.

- You can't back out now. - I'm not gonna back out,

And by the way, the whole relish thing was my idea in the first place.

Pistols at dawn then.

- Choccy? - Mmm.

And i sport a pretty impressive beard,

Which the ladies seem to find most attractive.

I enjoy long walks and quiet conversations.

Hello?

Hello!

A beard.

Thank you for a lovely evening.

My pleasure.

- And yes. - Yes what?

Yes, you can see me again tomorrow if you like.

- Do you always say exactly what's on your mind? - Pretty much.

Life's too short to play games.

- I've got some business with isobel in the morning. - Afterwards, then.

We could walk. I'll show you the estate, if you like.

Brilliant.

Put us down for 6,000 nippon koga.

- ( door closes ) - Yeah... Hello?

- Lucy: hello. - Hello?

Hello.

Oh, come on, lucy. I'm going mad here. There's nothing to do.

That's why you bought it.

And the other one.

You're my p.A., not my flaming mother!

Ahem!

And, if i were you, i wouldn't get so close to that paul geezer.

It's a small community.

You can have these back when you promise to be good.

Give us the brandy, at least. I only had two glasses at sup.

- To the duel. - That was very bad of you.

- ( laughs ) - Why couldn't you leave them

- To do their relish stuff in peace? - I miss it, luce.

It's the only thing i do really well, taking a seedling company and bringing it on.

It would be so good to get back in the saddle,

In a small, low-Stress way.

You're expecting to win then?

I'm a fairly decent shot, yeah.

And paul was an n.C.O. In the paras.

They tend to put in the hours on the popgun practice.

He is full of surprises, isn't he?

Might just have to give him a surprise of me own.

- Golly: okay. - Here's some more for you.

- Hi. - Both: hi.

- Saw your car. - Ta-Da!

- Oh, they're great! - I hope the locals think so.

Gotta get them in somehow. I don't know what else to do.

They're fine.

I'll help put them up if you like.

- Thanks, jess. - Okay, later.

- Bye. - See ya!

Some more there.

Morning. Where do you want the veg?

Anywhere. Butter that, will you?

I'm on with your dundee cake.

My gratitude is as a bottomless well

From which i shower you with benisons.

What's a benison?

Oh, blessings.

When they come along, they should be shared.

Picnic for two any trouble, ewan?

Got some nice beef from isobel.

Cheese would be better. Oh ta.

Left with the crumbs as per usual.

You didn't hear the radio last night, did you?

- No, why? - Me neither.

I watched a video, "the lion king." you know it?

Mm-Hmm, isn't that a kids' film?

Very true. Give me a british fighter aircraft

- 1939 to present day anytime. - What are you on about?

I was just saying i might take up metal detecting.

- Eh? - Or... Grow a beard.

- Oh... - I just thought

You might like to enjoy a quiet conversation.

Yeah, but not with you, you bampot.

You'll get 50 jars in there, no problem.

The problem is that's where they'll stay.

- No one's gonna see them back here. - Nonsense!

And you can take your eyes off that spot.

I'll not move these wee chaps for some untried condiment.

You're not telling me people actually buy these?

They're our most popular line,

- Sold throughout the scottish diaspora. - Well, they're naff.

You're fairly new to retail, mr. Bowman, i gather.

I fear your career may be short-Lived.

Why, golly, what wouldn't i do

To get back in your good books?

Thank you, janet.

Okay...

Morag kennedy.

- Isobel: lucy seems nice. - Paul: does she?

You took her out to dinner last night.

I was being welcoming.

New neighbor.

- I think she's very nice. - So do i.

Do you?

Why the grilling?

- Grilling? - Lucy.

I was just making conversation.

There's nothing between us.

Oh.

We're just neighbors.

- Paul? - Yeah?

I...

You what?

I think she's lovely.

This one's full.

Chester's hired a ghillie, by the way.

He says how do you fancy making it a four-Gun?

Not problem. Golly's a great shot.

This ghillie, is he local?

No idea. Name of mcgonagle.

- Bit of a weirdo, apparently. - Careful, those are—

- ( gasps ) - Slippy.

Thanks.

- Gonna help me up? - Sure.

I have a small gift for you.

North african, i haggled long and hard for it.

Silver.

Donald, as you know, i'm a single woman living alone.

I hope you wouldn't trifle with my affections.

Oh no.

So, before accepting your thoughtful gift,

May i ask what it betokens?

- My affection. - ( chuckles )

You'll forgive me if i take that with a pinch of salt,

Given your record in matters between us.

Why now, everything's different.

We're no longer children,

We have our own free will.

But if you were to leave me in the lurch again...

Oh, i have a plan.

This time tomorrow i can reveal it to you, but not before.

- Do you trust me? - ( laughs )

Well,

Of course i trust you, donald.

- Why on earth shouldn't i? - Until tomorrow then.

And before you go, could you help me up?

- ( crackling ) - ( birds chirping )

My father, the colonel,

Always used to say to me,

"rule number one, lucy, dry feet, stand easy."

He used to take us all camping.

I mean, real, rough camping.

I had a suspicion he wanted us all to be boys.

I've got three sisters, you see, all older.

You?

No, only child.

Missed all that.

( sighs ) there's 11 of us now,

Including spouses and sprogs various.

We all troop back for christmas,

Log fires, carols.

A bit silly really.

Not silly at all.

It sounds perfect.

Mr. Grant!

Mcgonagle.

It's a substantial sum you're asking for.

Well, marriage is a very expensive undertaking.

A poor second to divorce, in fact.

Now, on the matter of security.

Security?

We're delighted to make the loan

But we would require a security.

Ah, well, there's my newly-Restored classic car.

- Worth double that. - Well, i'm sure it is,

- But it would have to be property, mr. Macdonald. - Oh dear.

Well, i'm afraid glenbogle is in my nephew's name.

Perhaps he would stand as guarantor for you.

I mean, who knows you better than your own nephew?

- Eh... - He'll need to sign this though.

Ah. ( chuckles )

Well, it's entirely up to you, sir.

The maclntosh shuffle is reliable,

But it's a bit old hat.

Whereas the moroccan double, that's very popular around here.

I don't cheat, mcgonagle. I never have, never will.

I very much doubt if he will either.

That guy that failed to mention he was an ex-Para? Are you sure?

True.

We just won't mention your dark and murky past then, eh?

You know, this is extraordinary.

This is gonna be the first non-Bent shooting match in scottish history.

You're here to restore the balance, mcgonagle.

Keep things even.

- ( glass thumps ) - You just beat his ghillie,

- And i trust you will, - Mm-Hmm.

I need only draw to take the prize.

Hi, hello. ( giggling )

Thanks a lot. Bye-Bye.

- Salsa. - Oh, i'm sorry, but salsa is absolutely full.

I must do something.

Okay, well how do you feel

About ballet for beginners?

Great.

Isobel?

- ( switch clicks ) - Man: did i mention i'm a vet?

Well i am, a locum anyway.

And i love being around animals and i'm betting your girl does too.

And i think, a female ghillie— well wow.

Blonde hair, blue eyes— i can see why you call her a dream date.

You could probably go on all night, rory,

But you're not going to. Right, the lines are closed

So tune in tomorrow night and i'll announce the lucky winner.

Ah.

Thank you, thank you. ( chuckles )

( groaning ) i thought it was what you wanted.

- You gave out my details... - No names.

- On air... - It's hardly radio 1.

- So that some strange bloke... - One sounded okay.

- I knew you were mad. - ( choking ) the vet.

I ought— hi, dad.

Jess.

- How are you in this stuff? - Where did you get that?

- Mobile library. - You celebrating?

Every class just about full.

- Ah, the power of advertising, eh? - Golly: well,

Least said... For two.

- 8:00. - I'm kinda busy— aye!

See, your dad's up for anything. You're just scared.

- I'm careful. - Phone number.

The vet. Name's rory.

Och, okay, hang onto your pride or take a chance, who knows?

- Jess? - Shh, i'm thinking.

To speak openly, moira, and at the risk of...

I thought my chances of happiness had gone forever.

I thought so too, once upon a time.

But now i hope...

I dare to think.

That we could be together? ( squeals )

Oh, donald, is that your plan?

And now i'm capable of carrying it out.

You from the big house and me just a farmgirl.

Oh, those things count for nothing these days.

- ( chuckles ) - What will your family say?

Oh, well, i wouldn't tell them. ( chuckles )

But by the time they notice i've gone...

- We'll be miles away. - ( gasps )

Come to the farm. Shall we say 9:00 in the morning?

Oh, my dear girl.

And be sure to pack enough for a long hard journey.

No road too rocky, no way to steep.

- Till tomorrow, donald. - Yes.

It's not your fault they're stuck away back there.

Well, maybe i could have been more persuasive.

No doubt chester would have found a way.

- I knew i should have stood aside, for your sake. - It's early days yet.

I told you this would happen.

And i told you these chaps sell like hot cakes.

This is the last carton. How does your relish square up against that, eh?

And... Down.

You're settling in from what i hear.

Mind, you must be on top of each other in that wee place.

We don't mind. Backs lovely and straight, and chins up, girls!

I'm sure you don't. He's quite a catch.

And you don't have to fret yourself.

Fret myself? And stretch and hands lovely and graceful. Watch me.

Och, it was just the same with the yoga.

Ever such a nice young girl, but there just wasn't the interest.

She didn't have a golly to fall back on.

- I'm not falling anywhere. - Not now, no.

And stretch, really feel those muscles. Great!

Not that anyone minds doing golly a favor.

Gracious, he's done enough for all of us.

- Favor? - Joining your classes.

- Golly? - All: um-Hmm.

- Is that why all of you are here? - All: yes.

Like i say, not that we mind at all.

- Nothing's too much trouble for golly. - ( all agree )

- Hi, jess. - Hi.

- This is rory, the locum vet. - Hi.

Hi.

Who are you calling?

( stammering ) uh, i'm— just ringing ewan.

Right now.

- Aye, aye. - This is never gonna work.

- What's happened? - Well, i thought i'd really cracked it.

But no, they were all just doing you a favor.

( exhales sharply ) what does it matter why they were there?

It was humiliating!

Now they're all back in your good books,

They're obviously not going to keep coming just for me.

They might.

- I just felt that you were losing heart. - I am.

- Finally, i am. - ( knocking )

- ( sighs ) - Ewan: hello?

- All righty. - Ewan.

Thai green curry with all the trimmings.

Flower for the lady

And a bill for the gent.

Lovely.

- I'll be off then, eh? - Thanks, son.

It looks great.

Look, to do what you have in mind,

- To build it up, could take years. - I haven't got years.

My life as a dancer is over now.

- Come on, you don't know that. - Yes, i do!

Teaching is all i have left.

Tonight was, well— was just the last straw.

Rory, i hope you're listening, mate, 'cause you're our lucky winner.

- ( applause sounding ) - Tomorrow night, 8:00, ghillie's rest.

The laird's account, that'll be the day, eh?

Good man, dougal, thanks.

Excuse me. I shall be leaving after breakfast,

- If you'd make out my bill. - Of course i will.

Dougal? Is she staying here?

Yeah.

- Mr. Bowman! - Oh, morning.

I'm glad we were able to help your uncle out at this happy time.

I'll send you a copy of the guarantee form in the post.

And thank you for signing it so quickly.

Donald? Donald?

Moira? Where's donald?

- Not with me. - I'm his nephew. I need to find him

- Or he's in a load of trouble. - Good.

Look, i don't know what's gone on between you,

But he's not a bad man, deep down.

And whatever it is he was planning...

He's risked everything he has for it, and quite a lot he hasn't.

Look, he's put his home, his family, his freedom on the line for you.

Now, if you know where he is, please, tell me.

Meg's voice: "dear golly,

I'm sorry i'm running out like this,

But i've always been able to look after myself.

I've always worked,

Something you know all about.

I need some time to think,

To decide if i'm strong enough to give all that up.

Forgive me. Love always, meg."

I meant no harm, lass.

So, uncle, tell me, which part of this

Did you think was an especially good idea?

The fraud, the forgery or breaking the curfew order?

Please tell me i haven't missed anything out.

I left you the morgan, worth more than the bank loan.

The bank take fraud very seriously, you know?

I'm gonna have to tell them.

- What? - I'm sorry you've been put through all this.

I deserved it.

All those years ago she was waiting here.

We were going to be married.

She was everything i ever wanted, paul.

You've seen her. Can you imagine?

She was an angel.

And you broke my heart.

I didn't deserve it,

Not to be discarded in that way.

After all we'd been to each other,

I deserved at least an explanation.

Father found out.

I'd packed a small case and i was sitting on my bed and...

I never could stand up to him.

He bundled me off to some relations miles away.

- I'm so sorry. - Is weakness your excuse?

I'm afraid in the end it has to be.

A despicable thing, i have to admit.

It was never indifference that kept me away,

It was the shame.

After all the fine promises, all the big talk,

To have to face the shame...

I couldn't. Until now.

I told you the truth.

I came to see the old house again, but—

When i saw you,

It seemed an opportunity to even the score.

What i did was very cruel.

No more so than what i did.

Och, och, donald,

As you say, you were only a boy.

I cried and cried like a baby.

Mother couldn't take it in the end.

We packed up and we left the old house to rack and ruin.

All those memories.

Yes. I had no idea, i'm desperately sorry.

Don't be.

I've had a happy life.

I'm widowed now, but i've got a loving family

As i can see you have.

I just wanted to hear it from your own lips...

That i wasn't a nobody.

Oh, far from it. Hardly a day has gone by—

Oh, far from a nobody.

Do you still have that chain?

Yes.

It's not from north africa.

It's from the village shop. 1.99.

I'm not only a liar,

I'm a poor liar—

In the sense of not having any money.

Perhaps now we can be a good memory for each other, do you think?

- I hope so. - I'm sure.

It seems i owe you a vote of thanks,

An apology, a few quid and a pile of crockery,

In no particular order.

You're a macdonald,

You're allowed to be an expensive liability.

In fact, it's pretty much expected.

But, if you could stop short of felony next time,

I'd appreciate it. Hey, donald...

Make it last, please.

Fill it with bubbly. We'll start soon.

Paul, come meet my temporary ghillie.

Mcgonagle, meet paul bowman.

- How do you do? - Hello. That's a nice gun.

Thomson of aberdeen, 1885.

Very rare. Nice medallion.

Olympic shooting gold, 1996.

( chuckles ) that's even rarer.

Just to even things out, sergeant bowman.

By the way, where is— what's his name, golly?

Pull!

Pull!

- Pull! - Man: good shot.

We've given him 15 minutes.

I think a no-Show equals a forfeit. Isn't that right?

- Aye, that'd be the normal way. - Give him a bit longer!

I mean, just from a fair play point of view.

It would be a shame if you had to forfeit,

But on the other hand— off you go, mcgonagle.

- Chester— - No, no, no,

All's fair in... Business.

Pull!

Nice shooting, mcgonagle.

So.

Golly said he'd be here. Just give him a bit longer.

Rules is rules, sarge.

Let's bend them then, shall we? Like good neighbors.

I'm really sorry, paul, this is all my fault.

I told him you'd been in the army and he's so insanely competitive.

Who's side are you on?

You wanted the shooting match in the first place.

- Now i want to make my investment. - I'll take the shots.

You're not his ghillie.

Chester, you hired an olympic marksman.

No offense anyone, but i think

I'm in a win-Win situation. So, isobel—

Pull! Now!

- Yes! - What kept you?

Sorry, paul.

Pull!

Pull!

Well done.

Oh dear, chester, a draw.

Looks like it's all down to you now then, doesn't it?

- Meg not with you? - No, she isn't.

Pull!

- ( audience groans ) - Bad luck.

Chester, this is wrong.

You're in a much better position to help isobel than i am.

- So? - So call it off.

What, you're willing to cede the match to me?

This isn't about us, it's about isobel.

And like you said yourself, many times,

You're a better man for the job than i am.

You don't know that. If you were put on the spot,

You never know what you might come up with. Take the shot.

Pull!

- Well done, boss. - Well done.

Make the most of it. I'll beat you next time.

So, we still in business then?

Still in business.

Listen, i know this relish stuff is really important,

But i thought this contest

Deserved a proper highland trophy.

So to the victor the spoils.

I couldn't resist him.

Isn't he the most outrageously cute thing you've ever seen?

These, please.

Isn't that where those awful wee dogs were? Like the one that lucy got you?

Yeah, they... Must have sold out.

Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa! What the hell?

Have you nowhere else to be, lass?

- I see the juniper's in berry already. - Really?

- It's a good sign though, yeah? - Yeah, a good sign.

I never did like these. Did you?

Your father's favorite.

Worthless tat.

Come on. There's loads of them.

- ( china shatters ) - ( laughing )

Again!

Pull!

At ease.