Original subtitles

I'm gonna be a lawyer.

My mum's gonna hate me.

You're a fucking mess, yeah?

Not in a cute way.

You had to tell everyone I got chlamydia?

Sorry, girl.

It's for that.

I'm Henry. We're both sad. We wanted to fuck away our problems.

Casual. That's all it is.

Casual. With a boy who's loved you for as long as he could speak.

There's this naked guy outside. You can see his dick and everything.

That's my dad. I'm sorry, Benny Tai.

What about your mum?

I don't have a mum. They're korotaki sharing.

So we're really wanting to diversify our staff.

So you could stick your fucking white mumbo jumbo kumbaya diverse bullshit.

What about kicks? We're here.

It's a police game, so it must have been serious.

Nobody who can do anything about it actually gives a shit. So fuck.

Who cares?

I mean, if you want to talk about it.

Nah, it's all good. You're the biggest fuck up here.

Don't talk your own shit out. If I could just say one thing.

Shut up.

Yo, I lost my job.

Bad news.

Couldn't find any pussy.

No job and my pussy's been murdered. Shit. And you need to figure out who you

are and not be a little bitch about it.

And you need to brush your fucking hair.

At least when you lived here, your interests were dick and not arson.

I agree with her. Of course you would. Shush! Shush your face! Where are you?

Shush!

Don't let him in, that's a fire starter!

You've got to hide her. No, absolutely not.

Do you know how we've been smashing for a couple of weeks?

Well, I was thinking that you are really nice.

And I just thought, I don't know, it might be nice to have some kind

of connection with someone.

So I was thinking, do you want to go get a feed with me on

purpose?

This is where you say yes, you're playing party alert.

Oh, whoops. Sorry. Ask me again. Okay. Okay, ready?

Do you want to get a feed with me?

Yes. Yes.

I got pissed.

Oh,

but there's heaps of mail for you from where my lived here. It's on the table.

Okay, thanks.

Sweet.

You going to watch?

Oh, sorry.

You know, Viv, you have a lot of resilience. If somebody spewed on me,

rip their hair out. You did rip your hair out, Pooh. She's out on the street

crying. Yeah.

You spew on this, you're spewing on all of us.

Aw, they're so nice.

Paws in a sex bag. Paws in a sex bag.

Tino.

So we've been here for an hour.

How's the vibes?

She's talking about, you know, you staying with me and your undies being

over my bedroom floor.

No, I mean with hips.

Oh, no issues.

Me and hips are good.

We just needed some space.

Yeah, and now her space is my space.

It's good you've been able to stay friends with hips. Well, we're not

friends, but I've turned a new leaf.

I've got new rules that I'm following and no exceptions.

You know what? She's actually doing pretty good.

I'm not drinking.

I'm celibate.

No smashing randoms from the internet.

No smashing childhood friends who are also your flatmates.

No relationships. No masturbating. Not even a casual wink.

No masturbating? That's surprising for you.

Thank you.

Yeah, well, I mean, I'm growing and learning and just being better.

So have you told your mum about not doing the lawyer stuff?

Fuck no.

What about you?

How's the team been going, Pua?

I make a lot of money, but I'm nothing but a glorified typist. It's very not

Why? Because I'm a star.

Okay, I'm over this. Help me up. Come on.

Does my hair smell like soup?

Like lemonade soup?

It's the king.

Finally.

Sorry. Sorry, y 'all.

I forgot my V.

But yeah, I have fun though.

Yeah.

Shit.

Um,

nothing. Well, let's find another spot.

Oh fuck!

Holy shit!

You look like you need a ciggy Thank

you Are

you gonna light it?

Oh, yeah, sure. Yeah.

Sorry.

Sorry.

What up, crack

whore?

Oh, fuck, it's always you. Yeah, well, what is this? Is this, like, your new

book? Hey, no judgment.

Who said I was judging?

I don't give a fuck what you do.

Okay. Besides, you're more interesting now than you've been in, like, what,

seven years?

What, is that you being nice? Bitch, I'm always nice.

There's always me being nice.

Oh, shit.

Let's fuck!

I'm

Leo,

by the way.

What's your name?

It's a beautiful name.

And you're a funny man.

Oh.

Oh. So, um, do you, like, come with anyone, or are you...

No.

So, very cool.

So, do you want me to suck your dick or what? My, um, yeah.

Oh, you mean like now?

Uh -huh.

Get up.

oh yo you think funnier uh no

um are you washing your dick in the sink

no i wasn't doing that that'd be part of it well then what were you doing hey

i was watching oh

Hey Ma!

Hey, how's it going?

Good. I can see your brother. He's not shitting. Yeah, I know. My brother's

really good.

Your hair looks nice.

Oh, thanks.

Ma is celibate.

What's that?

It means she's not having sex or masturbating at all.

Ever?

Ever.

Yes, she's also... Okay, girl, thanks.

Thanks, Liz. You're so informative.

Hi. Hi.

Hey, Parnia.

What the fuck?

Look at this shit.

It's okay.

Yeah, he's fine. I mean, he's wasted, but he's fine.

No, I mean, is he okay okay?

He's avoiding me.

Oh, there's toilet paper everywhere.

How's the scouts been going?

Hey, have you seen Parnia?

I just want to make sure he's okay.

Okay, but he has no shirt on. He's playing beer pong.

He's okay.

Yeah, I'm still just a bit worried.

Well...

I don't know.

I mean, I can take it one day at a time.

Dear Liz, I would be so happy to hear back from you.

Maybe you could come visit me on the Gold Coast.

I would really like to know you.

I have many things to talk to you about.

Love, Sharon.

Whoa.

Honestly,

I can't keep up with all the babies out there.

Same.

Do you think he's avoiding me?

Poor.

Um, excuse me.

Can you pay attention to me? Who are you talking to?

My friend.

About what?

About my activities.

But I'm the friend you talk to about activities.

Babe, it's not that deep. It's filthy from work.

Hey, who are you?

Hello.

Hey, I'm Leo.

Oh, I know who you are.

Cool.

Hey, I was just about to head out, but I just wanted to grab your number.

For?

So I can text you.

Okay. Sweet.

Sweet. Thanks. I'll catch up.

Bye, Leo.

And I thought I was the only one into weird white boys.

Shut the fuck up.

And this is your lifeline,

which tells you how long you're going to live.

And?

It's not very long.

But this is your career line, and this one looks long.

Wait, maybe that one's your lifeline.

Maybe you have a long life and a short career or a short life and a long career

I'm

gonna

go do a reading for someone else I don't think your friend should be doing palm

readings

Hey, do you know how we've been, you know, hurting?

Yeah, there.

I was thinking maybe if you wanted to, we could go get a feed together because

we like each other and not because we're hungry.

I'll fuck you.

Oh, fuck.

Watch out for the door, bro.

Thanks, bro.

Oh, my God. The vet y 'all's on fire and Sam's about to jump off the roof.

What?

Come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on, come on.

See? Look.

Quickly. Come on. Hurry up.

All right.

Okay.

Who started the fire in the backyard?

Sam. Technically, it was his friend's throat. I find fire to be quite healing.

Okay, so we shut the party down. Wait, why?

Because our party nearly got burned down.

I was expecting your new flatmate is a fucking psycho.

At least when you were here, your interests were like dick and not artsy.

hey, look at the mirror.

And half our place is nearly gone, including my transformer one. And you

that is crossing the line.

Yeah, well, manakitanga.

Well, we invited all of these people here. We can't just tell them they have

leave. Hibs, what are you on?

Hibs is right.

I mean, personally, I think it's our responsibility to manake our manuhiri.

Have you changed your outfit?

Yeah, thank you for noticing, Elizabeth.

I am the system.

Because the system is white.

I started on the blood of our ancestors.

Yeah, you look like a youth campaign.

Yeah, it's not even a costume party.

It wasn't a costume.

Okay, so let's pull you go round up everyone in the lounge. Ma. Ta. You go

up everyone in the room Okay, let's push.

Wait, wait, hold. Okay, kia tau my friend, manaakitanga. Oh my god, peps,

are talking out of your arsehole. Okay, so manaakitanga.

Mana and aki. Aki to uplift and encourage.

Nice. Shush. Look, it's not just a one -way thing. It's reciprocal, okay? We

their mana and in doing that, our mana is akied.

Mana. Aki, tanga.

Nearly burning this place down? That ain't it.

Yeah, you know, I don't think it's wise to aki the mana of people who, like,

slash their nutsack every second. And people who like to wash their dick in

sink. Ew, who did that?

No one.

Personally, I do believe that my mana is strongest with mana motuhake. So, if

the pig comes through, then I reckon we revolutionise under the banner of Māori

sovereignty, mother fuckers. What about manaia? You know, like, seahorses?

They're really special.

They attach their tails together so that they don't float away, and the males

give birth, which kind of reminds me of my dad.

I just really like seahorses.

Okay, Liz.

Oh, so boring, y 'all. So boring.

You. Hit.

Nobody's going to believe that you're the new Tamiti. If you want to get

up, just say that. I'm just trying to have a good time.

Huh? Yeah, the house is fucked up. We're at a party. What did you expect?

Pocity? Growth. Make better choices.

I love you. You're perfect.

Ma, you're trying.

Thanks. And me.

Well, I'm perfect. Duh.

Yeah, I agree with Coach.

Of course you are. Shush! You shush. You shush. Shush your face! Okay, whether

you shush!

Don't leave him in there to fire starter!

The police are here! No, no, absolutely not. Oh, come on, please, let me in!

Thought everyone had like gone home or was in bed. Oh, I'm finished.

So how are you?

I'm good.

I'm good.

With everything, I just want to make sure you're okay.

Thanks. Honestly, I'm good.

Okay.

And hey, we haven't hung out in a long time.

Not in a weird way, but in a friend way.

We used to be friends before everything.

Well, just flick me a line and we'll do something.

Yeah, okay, cool.

Yeah, okay.

Did you need to use the phone? Yeah, yeah.

All right, well, get home safe.

Oh, cool.

Thank you.