Original subtitles

Let's start with a tour, Trey, shall we?

Well, this is the house, obviously. The internet password is insensitive.

I technically don't have a cat, so if you find one, it's probably lost. And

please don't eat my probiotics because they are specifically for female

reproductive health.

Gut flora.

No, I think the cat's name is Raisin and she lives with my neighbors.

Trey, are you familiar with the concept of self -care?

Yes, of course.

This is what happens when you kick it into overdrive.

Wow. Mom and I went on a bit of a good time bender, and we treated ourselves to

a whole lot of stuff.

There's very distinct energy in here. It's like a heavy fog of denial.

I'm going to disagree with you there, Trey. It's more like the off -gassing of

retail therapy.

Is that a Power Wheels Jeep? You know, I thought that would be bigger, like full

-size or whatever.

It seemed like a smoking deal at the time. My eyes are actually having a hard

time.

Processing everything?

Organizing this room is going to be one of your first tasks as my personal

assistant. So get those eyes checked.

Should be a piece of cake now that I'm paying for your extended medical.

Jen.

No, no, don't send me out.

I like it here.

There's something comforting about the weight of other people's mistake.

Kale, you're so funny.

That's unintentional. You remember Trey? Trey is my new personal assistant.

This is his first day.

Hey. Hi.

Can we leave? I am desperately trying not to breathe in the negativity, and

getting a little lightheaded.

Yeah. Kale, don't forget to turn yourself over once in a while, okay?

you don't want to end up getting bed sores.

So... What happened to her exactly?

What part? Like, why is she living like a hermit crab underneath the weighted

blanket of my shopping addiction?

Yeah. That was me, my bad.

Morning, Mom. Hi, sweetie.

That woman in there may look like a hot mess express, but she used to be a

legitimate adult bully.

Really? Mm -hmm. She forced me to sing a song about menopause dressed up as a

sexy baby clown.

I'm a hot mess, I'm a hot...

And she pretty much destroyed my friendship with Katie Lang. That's

Katie won't even accept my calls, not even from a burner phone. But you know

what the worst thing that Kale did?

She stopped me from recording my new album.

Oh, did you hear us talking about you, Kale?

Obviously, you're super loud.

I'm not that loud.

Remember when you told me that recording an album was a useless exercise?

It is.

Well, I'm going to record a new record despite what you think.

I don't care.

You might want to get a fork for that.

I just use my face. My mouth is nature's fork.

You look really put together.

He is.

This woman will break you.

What is going on with her? Isn't it obvious?

You fired Kale and she lost all her responsibilities.

She's regressing into an immature childlike state.

You're out of OJ.

She's basically becoming a teenager.

See why she's no longer your manager. And yet, she has somehow become my

roommate. Who is your new manager? I should probably get their contact

Me. I am my own manager.

That's like suddenly declaring you your own doctor.

Did I or did I not diagnose my own athlete foot? Oh, that's an easy one.

you're not an athlete, Mom.

All I know... is that if you want something done right, you've got to do

yourself. You just literally hired an assistant.

Pick another topic, Mom. Well, I'm really excited that you're going to

new album. It's great news, and it's about damn time.

Exactly, Trey. Call Access Records. Get me in to see Frank ASAP.

Not before you and Maxie take me to the mall, like you promised.

Make me an appointment.

ASAP. IRL. ETA.

TBD.

What? Just book it for 2 o 'clock. Okay.

See me managing my own situation?

That's what it looks like.

LMFAO.

LMFAO.

Due to the kids' unfortunate school photos, I realized they need new

Twerking while working? Really?

The garbage messaging has got to stop.

the movie mannequin i love that movie i kind of get the attraction now she's

making me want to get a job here oh mama is officially too short to roam around

on her own i spend the whole time looking for her there's the little

she's getting a free makeover at the cosmetic counter should have known she's

it for the free sample i am too it's like trick -or -treating all year long

mom Hey. There you are. We thought we lost you again.

Nope. I'm getting a fresh look, and you should try it, too. It'll be fun.

Oh, no. I'm not really... I like a sort of just natural sort of fairly there

look. I want to look as hot as that mannequin. Good choice. Do you watch

Race? I want to look like Trixie Mattel. Love that for you.

What is Nicole adding here?

I believe she's gone with cornstarch.

What are you watching?

You've never seen Bake It Till You Make It?

It's a cooking show where amateur bakers compete with one another, but they have

to use recipes written in foreign languages. That sounds unnecessarily

complicated.

Poroshodiya Vapitsky is Ukrainian for baking soda.

Moron. You know what might be beneficial for you? What?

A sound bath.

No, thanks. You know what might be beneficial for everyone else?

If you took, like, a regular bath.

Like, with soap.

Do you happen to speak Spanish, Trey? No.

Callate.

Enorme idiota.

So what exactly happened between you and Jan anyway?

Well, Trey, you must know I poached her from an idiota named Todd, got her a

stylist, dressed her in snakes and balls, asked her to stretch herself

artistically, had her record a fire club drag that's currently huge in Japan,

and presented her with a Lifetime Achievement Award. Then completely out

nowhere, the woman fires me.

She's extremely immature.

Look at you. How do you feel?

Like I want a lip sync for my life. I guess we should thank you guys for

What are we calling them, makeovers? And you are absolutely right, Tristan. I

could not live my best life without this faultless match liquid highlighter and

the brow bitch eyebrow fluffing fiber.

Yeah, you should totally buy them, Jan.

Thank you, Max.

I will next.

I promise I will be back for those.

Thank you. We'll never see them again.

Mom?

Seriously?

I'm certain I paid for them.

At least I think I did.

Mom, your wallet was in my purse, remember?

There's no way that you paid for them.

Oh, I don't remember putting them in my pocket.

Oh, I'm so sorry, girls. I'm so embarrassed.

You're embarrassed?

We're horrified.

It was an accident.

You're a big help.

What are we doing?

We clearly have no idea how to handle this.

You know what we have to do.

I know what you're thinking.

If we turn her in, she'll have a free bed, three square meals a day.

No.

Not jail.

Not jail. No.

We have to go to that caregiver support group thing, the one I sent you the link

to. Right. We need help figuring out how to deal with situations like this. I

agree.

But we don't have to go back in there and return this stuff, right? Oh, hell

No, no. I'll get Mom. You start the car.

Sorry, I'm 108 minutes late. I had quite the morning, if you know what I mean.

I don't. I'm Jan Arden.

I am here for my appointment with Frank.

Frank. Frank.

Music exec Frank. The old guy?

Define old.

I think old is when you wear a watch. I think old is when you look forward to

medical appointments, when you park really far away because you're worried

you're not going to find parking nearby. I'm going to just stop you right there

because I don't think my self -esteem can actually handle what you're about to

say next, so let's just move on.

Oh, my God.

That is such an old person thing to say.

Follow me.

access records?

Oh, no. They don't have the whole building anymore.

It's a co -working space now.

There's a tie -dye operation here.

Another tie -dye operation.

Tie -dye that's totally different, yet similar.

There's app designers, name designers, screenwriters.

Oh,

he's definitely poor, but he does know who his father is. There's a celebrity

dating site for A -list.

Oh, hang on a second.

Hey, hi!

Excuse me, I'm still waiting on my approval.

I would probably move on.

A tie -dye business?

Just follow me this way, please.

Um, Frank?

Jan Arden!

What's up?

I'm thinking about leaving music and starting a tie -dye business.

Who isn't?

More of a hobby. Have a seat.

Are you all that's left of access?

Yeah, well, you know, it's been a bit of a rough ride for the old music biz.

When were you last here exactly?

Oh, it wasn't that long ago.

Frank, friend.

Todd, acquaintance.

Jan's got a great idea for a new single. Wait till you hear it. Jan, take it

away.

It's a song where I just list a bunch of stuff that's ironic.

I think he likes it.

The laughter's ironic, don't you think?

It is. It totally is.

So, how are things?

Well, my sister and I are going to a caregiver support group later. Our

has dementia.

We really need help trying to figure out how to handle sticky situations. I

meant in your career.

Okay. Who's your manager these days?

I am self -managed.

Totally by choice.

Of course it is.

Okay, Frank.

I want to make a new album.

Women my age are totally tossed aside. We are completely invisible.

And I have so much more I want to say. And I think it's totally important that

people get to hear it.

I think $80 ,000 ought to cover it. Oh.

So are we doing this? No. What? Why?

Well, first, I personally am not a fan of yours. Hurtful.

But I get it. Anyway, I'm more in the business of producing music by 14 -year

-olds who are famous on social media now.

Admittedly not my strength.

Renegade, renegade, renegade.

Go, go, go.

I'm embarrassed for you.

I must still be selling records, Frank, because I'm... still getting royalty

checks. You are? Yes, I am. That's a mistake. We're going to need that money

back. Look at the time. I'm 112 minutes late for an appointment.

Jan? Jan?

Waverly.

I'm off to meet Max.

Are you sure you're not going to run out of stuff to do?

I think I'm good.

Kayle, in case I miss you on your way out, I'm going to say my goodbyes now.

Oh, no, you'll see me.

I'll be here.

Great.

Bye, Mom.

I guess we need to get your hearing checked.

She's gone.

Just didn't feel like talking to her this morning.

Relatable.

What? You don't like whipped cream?

Oh, what the hell?

A little regression never hurt anybody.

If you're hungry, I can make you both something healthy to eat instead of an

edible oil product.

We're not kids you're babysitting, but thanks anyway.

Supposed to go through these clothes from various events and only keep the

ones.

Only problem is, I can't find any.

Yep, Jan holds the record for the most worst dress looks.

She tried so hard, but her instinct is not good. What is this?

That's fresh if you wear it right.

Not convinced.

I guess I need to see it on.

Give it to me.

They couldn't get a professional sign?

That's not a good sign.

Would you just relax?

I know you have a hard time talking about mom and you'll take any excuse to

face it, but this is important.

What's that?

You have never been here before. Nothing in there can be yours.

That's where you're wrong.

Look.

Now you steal too? You cannot steal something that's lost, Matt.

I love these. Are you going to be able to focus? Because if not, I can stay and

just fill you in later. I would never make you do something like this by

yourself. If everyone can take their seats, we'll be getting started.

I'm going to need a full -size chair.

You're fine.

I'm a full -size woman.

Now get up.

This is a one -but -ticket -at -time situation.

Let's hear some stories from your week.

I had a rough week. My father has become very slow to do anything.

I know it's not his fault, but I can't help being annoyed with him.

Everything just takes so long.

Kind of like you getting to the point.

Does anyone have any advice?

I find you really just need to focus on the present.

Oh, I love presents, Jen.

I said be in the present.

Sorry? Thought you said presents, which I love.

Nobody said presents. Sorry?

You seem to have something on your mind. Why don't you share your issue?

Yes, thank you.

Our mother has Alzheimer's, and most days it's okay, but then something

happens and takes us by surprise.

Yesterday there was an incident that we didn't handle very well. Actually, we

were very hard on her.

Because of our actions, our mother is at home deeply depressed.

I'm Jan.

I think the bolder the pattern, more people will respect me.

Hi, I'm Jan. I think I'm the only person who has feelings.

Hi, I'm Jan.

I believe I'm a fat person.

Does anyone have any advice for Jan and Max and their situation with their mom?

Are you accessing your network?

No, I got two bars. That's not what she meant.

It takes a village to care for someone, and sometimes that means asking for help

when you need it. For example, my mom, she isn't very mobile anymore, so we

crowdfunded a motorized scooter for her.

It's given her a new lease on life, and everyone who loves her got to contribute

to that.

When my father needed full -time care, our family set up a meal train. Tell me

more about that.

Well, each day of the week... No, no, no, no, no, no. Not you. You.

Crowdfunding scooter lady. Me.

People. Just gave you money.

Well, yeah.

Sometimes care is expensive.

And people who love you, they just want to help out. That's it.

I am going to crowdfund my new album.

You guys have had amazing suggestions. And you've been hugely supportive.

Where are you going?

I'm going to go start my campaign.

Sorry. She gets excited and then...

And then lose his focus.

He won't disturb you again.

Max, make sure you grab some juice boxes.

I drink my family likes to pour stuff.

I'm a vegan who conveniently forgets that ice cream is a dairy product.

Hey, what is this?

Something from the Soprano?

Mom looks like she's in a better mood.

Has she had an official diagnosis?

Oh, my God.

I never told you. It's okay. I'm sorry.

When things are good, I really kind of forget about it. Did something happen?

No, no, everything's fine. I just recognized signs.

My grandpa had Alzheimer's.

Oh,

she sure looks happy. How did you do that?

Honestly, I just used a babysitting trick.

No kid can resist playing Threthop and dancing.

And sometimes you just have to be in the present moment.

I learned that in support group.

They even had snacks.

I guess we'll go back.

There's Tam.

Oh, I'm a hat person.

Yeah. You're home early. I came back to tell you that we are going to do a

crowdfunding campaign so that I can make my new album.

Okay. What's the concept?

I don't mind. I can work with this.

Hello, fans.

I'm iconic singer -songwriter Jan Arden.

And I'm offering you this once -in -a -lifetime opportunity to get in on the

ground floor of my new iconic album. You might remember this iconic album,

Living Under June, as modeled by my mother.

Living under June, living under her.

Or this other iconic album, Free, as modeled by my former manager, Kale.

I'm free.

That wasn't exact, but you get my drift.

Click the link below and become part of my new iconic album. Donate what you

can or even what you can't. Give up a little something so that you can give it

to me for my new iconic album.

Hit cut.

Right, right.

Take one.

Yeah. What do you want to do with this? Fight for Dave. Okay.

Who's mine, though?

Now you can feel the love you need.

Yes, I can. Yeah. Feel the love that I need. Yeah, feel the love you need. It's

a little bit creepy. Well, you could also feel the love you need. Oh, God,

You should feel the same, too.

How much will you give me?

I will give you literally my entire season's paycheck.

Isn't this an eight ball?

Will you ever get married? You may rely on it.