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1
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Previously on Four
Weddings and a Funeral...
2
00:00:02,934 --> 00:00:05,949
"You will always be the one
that got away. Love, Maya."
3
00:00:05,950 --> 00:00:09,369
Are you sure it's for you?
She didn't write "Dear Duffy".
4
00:00:09,370 --> 00:00:11,249
If you're available,
I'd like to hire you.
5
00:00:11,250 --> 00:00:14,879
The only décor I have is a dead
plant and a stack of pizza boxes.
6
00:00:14,880 --> 00:00:16,299
Do you still run the theater?
7
00:00:16,300 --> 00:00:18,053
I'm directing The Sound
of Music this year.
8
00:00:18,054 --> 00:00:19,875
Would you want to
play Captain Von Trapp?
9
00:00:19,876 --> 00:00:20,979
I'm in.
10
00:00:20,980 --> 00:00:23,689
Craig, I vow to love you more each day.
11
00:00:23,690 --> 00:00:26,029
Every second with you is a gift.
12
00:00:26,030 --> 00:00:28,411
Real talk, you're one of
the sickest people I know.
13
00:00:28,412 --> 00:00:30,645
I think I have feelings for Bash.
14
00:00:30,646 --> 00:00:33,959
Do you wanna come back to my place?
15
00:00:33,960 --> 00:00:35,443
For sex, Garrett.
16
00:00:35,444 --> 00:00:37,425
Of course I have feelings for you.
17
00:00:37,426 --> 00:00:39,889
I have since the first time we met.
18
00:00:39,890 --> 00:00:42,059
You're in love with
Kash. I found your letter.
19
00:00:42,060 --> 00:00:44,309
It is not what you think. Duffy!
20
00:00:44,310 --> 00:00:46,320
Duffy!
21
00:00:57,840 --> 00:00:59,929
♪ So long, farewell ♪
22
00:00:59,930 --> 00:01:02,219
♪ Au revoir, Auf Wiedersehen ♪
23
00:01:02,220 --> 00:01:05,809
♪ I'd like to stay and
taste my first champagne ♪
24
00:01:05,810 --> 00:01:06,979
Yes?
25
00:01:06,980 --> 00:01:08,859
No. Oh, fuck!
26
00:01:08,860 --> 00:01:10,773
Oh, sorry. Sorry, kids. I'm okay.
27
00:01:10,774 --> 00:01:13,539
Oh, my God. I nearly stepped
there. That could've been me!
28
00:01:13,540 --> 00:01:15,579
Stop being so dramatic, Parul.
29
00:01:17,420 --> 00:01:20,639
Everyone, I think
we're done for tonight.
30
00:01:20,640 --> 00:01:22,309
Right.
31
00:01:22,310 --> 00:01:24,429
I'm so sorry, Kashif.
32
00:01:24,430 --> 00:01:29,319
This place is just
falling down around us.
33
00:01:29,320 --> 00:01:30,949
I can get someone to fix the stage.
34
00:01:30,950 --> 00:01:32,449
No, no, you've done enough.
35
00:01:32,450 --> 00:01:34,329
You've already paid for the costumes.
36
00:01:34,330 --> 00:01:35,959
No.
37
00:01:35,960 --> 00:01:38,249
This'll just have to
be our final production.
38
00:01:38,250 --> 00:01:40,589
No. The theater can't close.
39
00:01:40,590 --> 00:01:42,719
I'll start doing drugs.
I'll join a gang.
40
00:01:42,720 --> 00:01:43,929
Okay, that's pretty dramatic,
41
00:01:43,930 --> 00:01:46,349
but she's right. They
can't close this place.
42
00:01:46,350 --> 00:01:47,694
They'll just turn it into more flats
43
00:01:47,695 --> 00:01:48,779
that no one around here can afford.
44
00:01:48,780 --> 00:01:50,754
I know, but you can't have a theater
45
00:01:50,755 --> 00:01:53,119
if you can't afford a stage.
46
00:01:53,120 --> 00:01:54,489
I might have an idea.
47
00:01:54,490 --> 00:01:56,209
Is it a bake sale?
48
00:01:56,210 --> 00:01:59,709
We'll barely recoup the
costs of ingredients.
49
00:01:59,710 --> 00:02:01,969
It's not a bake sale, Parul.
50
00:02:01,970 --> 00:02:03,259
It was a bake sale.
51
00:02:03,260 --> 00:02:05,679
I'll come up with something else.
52
00:02:19,444 --> 00:02:21,669
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
53
00:02:25,180 --> 00:02:27,139
Thanks for meeting me.
54
00:02:27,140 --> 00:02:30,359
I don't have long, so can you
just say what you came to say?
55
00:02:30,360 --> 00:02:32,199
Okay, um,
56
00:02:32,200 --> 00:02:35,119
that letter you found... you were right.
57
00:02:35,120 --> 00:02:37,539
It was for Kash, but I
was never going to send it.
58
00:02:37,540 --> 00:02:40,039
Mm.
59
00:02:40,040 --> 00:02:42,879
Please. Promise me
you won't say anything.
60
00:02:42,880 --> 00:02:44,599
Cool.
61
00:02:44,600 --> 00:02:48,349
Yeah, so, it's not bad enough
that you broke my heart.
62
00:02:48,350 --> 00:02:50,309
I now have to keep secrets for you?
63
00:02:50,310 --> 00:02:53,779
But there's nothing to
tell. Nothing happened.
64
00:02:53,780 --> 00:02:57,789
And I am never going to see him again.
65
00:02:57,790 --> 00:03:00,379
Okay, fine.
66
00:03:00,380 --> 00:03:01,879
Thank you, Duffy.
67
00:03:05,010 --> 00:03:08,269
Oh, uh, I saw your story in
The New Yorker came out.
68
00:03:08,270 --> 00:03:09,729
It's... it's really good.
69
00:03:09,730 --> 00:03:12,263
Yeah, oh, yeah. It's really good.
70
00:03:12,264 --> 00:03:13,457
You know what, Maya?
71
00:03:13,458 --> 00:03:16,487
I don't think that you and I have
anything to talk about anymore.
72
00:03:20,920 --> 00:03:24,129
Cheers.
73
00:03:31,270 --> 00:03:34,779
I read the speech you wrote on
increasing capital gains taxes.
74
00:03:34,780 --> 00:03:36,869
- And?
- Hmm, some excellent points,
75
00:03:36,870 --> 00:03:40,039
all of which are political suicide.
76
00:03:40,040 --> 00:03:41,139
Try again.
77
00:03:42,840 --> 00:03:44,969
Do you want me to have a whack at it?
78
00:03:44,970 --> 00:03:48,349
I just think I might have a better
sense of his voice than you do.
79
00:03:48,350 --> 00:03:50,599
Oh, is that why he doesn't
let you tweet for him anymore?
80
00:03:50,600 --> 00:03:54,439
No, that's because I accidentally
spelt "Parliament" wrong.
81
00:03:54,440 --> 00:03:56,489
Par-lia-ment.
82
00:03:56,490 --> 00:03:57,909
Par-lia-ment.
83
00:03:59,580 --> 00:04:01,539
Well, my dream has always been
84
00:04:01,540 --> 00:04:04,629
to work for a progressive,
diverse female candidate,
85
00:04:04,630 --> 00:04:08,299
but given my current situation,
I'm open to anything.
86
00:04:08,300 --> 00:04:10,309
But you are looking to
stay in the political field?
87
00:04:10,310 --> 00:04:12,439
Political, non-profit...
88
00:04:12,440 --> 00:04:14,729
just a job where I don't
have to push an agenda
89
00:04:14,730 --> 00:04:17,409
that's directly opposed
to everything I believe in.
90
00:04:17,410 --> 00:04:20,489
Well, we are the premier recruiting
agency for the public sector,
91
00:04:20,490 --> 00:04:22,459
so I'm sure we can find you something.
92
00:04:25,326 --> 00:04:27,759
- I'll have to call you back.
- We get it.
93
00:04:27,760 --> 00:04:29,299
60% of the calls we get
94
00:04:29,300 --> 00:04:32,639
are from people hiding
in office bathrooms.
95
00:04:42,500 --> 00:04:44,539
♪ So long, farewell ♪
96
00:04:44,540 --> 00:04:46,709
♪ Au revoir, Auf Wiedersehen ♪
97
00:04:54,350 --> 00:04:56,149
It's good, right?
98
00:04:56,150 --> 00:04:58,989
Would you give money
to something like that?
99
00:04:58,990 --> 00:05:03,249
I would give everything, yeah, to
make this right between you and me.
100
00:05:03,250 --> 00:05:05,039
What are you talking about?
101
00:05:05,040 --> 00:05:06,873
I'm not gonna lie, yeah?
102
00:05:06,874 --> 00:05:08,194
What I'm about to tell you could
103
00:05:08,195 --> 00:05:09,954
threaten the very foundation
of our friendship.
104
00:05:09,955 --> 00:05:11,679
Bruv, I know about you and Fatima.
105
00:05:11,680 --> 00:05:15,479
It's all over your
Snapchat. I'm cool with it.
106
00:05:15,480 --> 00:05:18,149
Bruv, you don't have to hide
your true feelings with me, okay?
107
00:05:18,150 --> 00:05:19,989
How can I make this
better? You know what?
108
00:05:19,990 --> 00:05:21,830
Hit me with your car.
109
00:05:23,593 --> 00:05:25,326
If you really want to
make things up to me...
110
00:05:25,327 --> 00:05:27,240
Well, I ain't gonna sleep
until I do, so go on.
111
00:05:27,241 --> 00:05:29,719
We need someone to take a look
at the tech system at the theater.
112
00:05:29,720 --> 00:05:31,229
The lighting desk is a mess.
113
00:05:33,006 --> 00:05:35,269
Are you sure you don't just
wanna hit me with your car?
114
00:05:35,270 --> 00:05:37,319
I heard it's a much
more cathartic process.
115
00:05:37,320 --> 00:05:39,069
I'm just thinking of
you, really, like...
116
00:05:39,070 --> 00:05:41,569
- Bruv.
- Hm?
117
00:05:41,570 --> 00:05:43,539
Okay, fine, fine. I'll do it for you.
118
00:05:45,500 --> 00:05:47,079
Fatima?
119
00:05:47,080 --> 00:05:49,969
No, that is my mum. Um,
I better answer that.
120
00:05:49,970 --> 00:05:53,099
Hey, boo. I've been thinking
about you, you know?
121
00:05:54,640 --> 00:05:56,870
And Dad'll be thinking
about that as well.
122
00:06:01,935 --> 00:06:05,159
_
123
00:06:05,160 --> 00:06:06,693
What am I doing?
124
00:06:06,694 --> 00:06:07,694
_
125
00:06:28,250 --> 00:06:31,839
Ladies and gentlemen, the kids of
the Hounslow Community Theatre.
126
00:06:31,840 --> 00:06:33,549
Take it away, guys.
127
00:06:43,990 --> 00:06:46,659
Oh, hi. Garrett, you're here.
128
00:06:46,660 --> 00:06:48,039
Again...
129
00:06:48,040 --> 00:06:50,129
Maya, I was hoping to see you.
130
00:06:50,130 --> 00:06:52,629
Did you know that you
131
00:06:52,630 --> 00:06:56,059
and the poet Maya Angelou...
132
00:06:56,060 --> 00:06:58,269
you share the same first name?
133
00:06:58,270 --> 00:07:01,069
Yes. Yes, I did.
134
00:07:01,070 --> 00:07:02,811
Garrett's really good at figuring out
135
00:07:02,812 --> 00:07:04,489
which celebrities have
the same name as you.
136
00:07:04,490 --> 00:07:06,829
Yeah, right. Try me, right? Anyone.
137
00:07:06,830 --> 00:07:09,370
Uh, Ainsley.
138
00:07:12,800 --> 00:07:15,679
I don't know. I don't know.
139
00:07:15,680 --> 00:07:18,349
It's tough. Hey, do you
wanna go out tonight?
140
00:07:18,350 --> 00:07:20,809
Ugh, yes. Work has been killing me.
141
00:07:20,810 --> 00:07:24,109
I was praised on an
Alt-right website last week.
142
00:07:24,110 --> 00:07:27,239
Well, Tony 2's taking
us dancing at a gay club.
143
00:07:27,240 --> 00:07:28,333
You wanna come, Garrett?
144
00:07:28,334 --> 00:07:31,169
Right, yeah. I can't go to gay bars.
145
00:07:31,170 --> 00:07:34,469
It's impolite to give a boner
that you can't reciprocate.
146
00:07:34,470 --> 00:07:35,509
Oh.
147
00:07:35,510 --> 00:07:38,389
Right. Let's go shower.
148
00:07:43,990 --> 00:07:47,239
What? We're in Europe.
149
00:08:11,830 --> 00:08:15,009
Can you sign my test please?
150
00:08:15,010 --> 00:08:17,639
100% in your Latin test?
151
00:08:17,640 --> 00:08:19,639
That's very good.
152
00:08:19,640 --> 00:08:22,649
"Brad Pitt played
Achilles in which film?"
153
00:08:22,650 --> 00:08:24,149
Troy.
154
00:08:24,150 --> 00:08:27,149
"What is your name in pig Latin?"
155
00:08:27,150 --> 00:08:28,323
Iles-gi.
156
00:08:28,324 --> 00:08:31,304
Well, what idiot teacher would
put together a test like this?
157
00:08:36,050 --> 00:08:38,509
Oh, Duffy! My man!
158
00:08:38,510 --> 00:08:39,929
How's it going, brother?
159
00:08:39,930 --> 00:08:42,179
Hey, guys. How was your honeymoon?
160
00:08:42,180 --> 00:08:44,769
Oh, man...
161
00:08:44,770 --> 00:08:47,029
I don't know what you
heard about Antarctica,
162
00:08:47,030 --> 00:08:48,909
but it is cold!
163
00:08:48,910 --> 00:08:50,239
A penguin bit my ass.
164
00:08:50,240 --> 00:08:52,449
Duffy, this place is a mess.
165
00:08:52,450 --> 00:08:55,089
If I wanted a drunk slob to house sit,
166
00:08:55,090 --> 00:08:56,919
I would've asked any one of my cousins
167
00:08:56,920 --> 00:08:59,139
or my uncles or my parents.
168
00:08:59,140 --> 00:09:00,599
Yeah, well, it's not my fault.
169
00:09:00,600 --> 00:09:02,349
You should fire your house cleaner
170
00:09:02,350 --> 00:09:04,559
because she said that
I was bumming her out,
171
00:09:04,560 --> 00:09:06,069
and then she left.
172
00:09:06,070 --> 00:09:07,819
Uh,
173
00:09:07,820 --> 00:09:09,739
is everything okay, Duff?
174
00:09:09,740 --> 00:09:13,329
I mean, this isn't,
uh, Maya-related, is it?
175
00:09:13,330 --> 00:09:15,169
No, Craig.
176
00:09:15,170 --> 00:09:17,549
I was emotionally destroyed
by a different woman
177
00:09:17,550 --> 00:09:19,549
in the two weeks that you were gone.
178
00:09:19,550 --> 00:09:21,929
Oh, no.
179
00:09:21,930 --> 00:09:24,189
You really have the worst luck.
180
00:09:24,190 --> 00:09:26,059
What? No. It's Maya.
181
00:09:26,060 --> 00:09:28,109
I'm still mad at Maya.
182
00:09:28,110 --> 00:09:30,989
I get it, but I don't think
she meant to hurt you, brother.
183
00:09:30,990 --> 00:09:32,283
You don't know that.
184
00:09:32,284 --> 00:09:35,947
Oh, there's a lot about
her that you don't know.
185
00:09:35,948 --> 00:09:38,368
- A lot.
- Like what?
186
00:09:42,430 --> 00:09:45,939
Nothing. I, uh... I'm late for school.
187
00:09:45,940 --> 00:09:47,979
I'm sorry that I drank all your alcohol
188
00:09:47,980 --> 00:09:50,569
and I broke your computer
with a virus from a porn.
189
00:09:50,570 --> 00:09:52,119
What?
190
00:09:55,500 --> 00:09:58,669
The Hounslow Community
Theatre led to my love of the arts
191
00:09:58,670 --> 00:10:00,469
and made me believe in my potential.
192
00:10:00,470 --> 00:10:03,219
These kids deserve the same opportunity.
193
00:10:03,220 --> 00:10:06,389
Please. Give as much as you can.
194
00:10:06,390 --> 00:10:08,399
♪ So long, farewell ♪
195
00:10:08,400 --> 00:10:10,399
♪ Au revoir, Auf Wiedersehen ♪
196
00:10:10,400 --> 00:10:13,319
Enough. Julie Andrews will
be rolling in her grave.
197
00:10:13,320 --> 00:10:14,723
Julie Andrews is still alive.
198
00:10:14,724 --> 00:10:16,669
No, you're thinking of
Julie Christie. I'm right.
199
00:10:27,810 --> 00:10:30,365
Okay, boys, now Helen
of Troy is described
200
00:10:30,366 --> 00:10:32,609
as "the face that
launched a thousand ships".
201
00:10:32,610 --> 00:10:34,659
What if you had a secret love letter
202
00:10:34,660 --> 00:10:38,459
written by Helen to Paris
that you could give to Ainsley?
203
00:10:38,460 --> 00:10:40,129
Who's Ainsley?
204
00:10:40,130 --> 00:10:41,969
Uh, Menelaus.
205
00:10:41,970 --> 00:10:44,679
And you know I meant Menelaus.
Do not be obtuse, Bernard.
206
00:10:44,680 --> 00:10:46,123
But, Mr. Duffy,
207
00:10:46,124 --> 00:10:50,069
in this thinly-veiled analogy
to your own romantic failings,
208
00:10:50,070 --> 00:10:53,989
wouldn't showing Menelaus the letter
just start the Trojan War sooner?
209
00:10:53,990 --> 00:10:56,199
Yeah, maybe,
210
00:10:56,200 --> 00:10:58,460
or maybe Helen deserves that.
211
00:11:00,040 --> 00:11:02,379
Ah, forget it. Just...
it's... class is dismissed.
212
00:11:02,380 --> 00:11:04,849
So please get out of here.
213
00:11:04,850 --> 00:11:06,469
Go wherever you go.
214
00:11:06,470 --> 00:11:08,599
Mummy? What are you doing here?
215
00:11:08,600 --> 00:11:11,609
I'm here to speak to Mr. Duffy.
I'll see you later, darling.
216
00:11:11,610 --> 00:11:13,820
- What the hell is this?
- Gemma.
217
00:11:15,799 --> 00:11:18,312
It's an A+. The kid's a nerd.
What do you want me to tell you?
218
00:11:18,313 --> 00:11:19,572
God, you're a state.
219
00:11:19,573 --> 00:11:21,504
Yeah, I'm kind of going
through some stuff right now.
220
00:11:21,505 --> 00:11:24,488
Well, snap out of it. These
boys are counting on you.
221
00:11:24,489 --> 00:11:25,848
How are they going to
survive in the world
222
00:11:25,849 --> 00:11:27,179
without a thorough grasp of Latin?
223
00:11:27,180 --> 00:11:28,979
I'm trying my best, dude.
224
00:11:28,980 --> 00:11:31,769
Well, dude, I don't pay
a small fortune so that
225
00:11:31,770 --> 00:11:33,219
Giles can sit and listen to his teacher
226
00:11:33,220 --> 00:11:34,449
complain about how women hate him.
227
00:11:34,450 --> 00:11:36,029
Oh, yeah, sorry about that.
228
00:11:36,030 --> 00:11:38,153
Well, maybe you could just transfer him.
229
00:11:38,154 --> 00:11:40,052
I hear they have a
fantastic Latin department
230
00:11:40,053 --> 00:11:42,129
at Saint I-Don't-Give-A-Shit!
231
00:11:46,890 --> 00:11:48,785
Gemma, wait. I'm sorry about that.
232
00:11:56,697 --> 00:12:00,539
♪ It feels good to be bad, bad, bad ♪
233
00:12:00,540 --> 00:12:03,749
♪ I wanna do whatever I wanna do ♪
234
00:12:03,750 --> 00:12:05,969
♪ 'Cause it feels good ♪
235
00:12:05,970 --> 00:12:08,639
♪ To be bad ♪
236
00:12:08,640 --> 00:12:11,849
♪ A little fun never hurt anyone ♪
237
00:12:11,850 --> 00:12:13,729
♪ Life's a party ♪
238
00:12:13,730 --> 00:12:16,489
Oh, my God. I needed a night out.
239
00:12:16,490 --> 00:12:18,489
Two Appletinis please.
240
00:12:18,490 --> 00:12:20,329
This isn't a movie.
This is a real gay bar.
241
00:12:20,330 --> 00:12:22,459
Order a normal drink.
242
00:12:22,460 --> 00:12:25,209
Three gin and slimline tonics, please.
243
00:12:25,210 --> 00:12:27,679
So, what's going on with Garrett?
244
00:12:27,680 --> 00:12:29,509
He seems really
245
00:12:29,510 --> 00:12:31,889
sweet and uncomplicated...
246
00:12:31,890 --> 00:12:33,689
like a golden retriever.
247
00:12:33,690 --> 00:12:37,359
Okay, I know you think he's dumb,
248
00:12:37,360 --> 00:12:39,199
and he is...
249
00:12:39,200 --> 00:12:40,749
But in his defense,
250
00:12:40,750 --> 00:12:43,249
he only eats one meal every two days.
251
00:12:43,250 --> 00:12:46,459
And it's not like we're dating.
I barely even know him.
252
00:12:46,460 --> 00:12:48,929
So you're, like,
strangers with benefits.
253
00:12:48,930 --> 00:12:50,559
- Exactly.
- I like that.
254
00:12:50,560 --> 00:12:52,203
Besides, after Kash,
255
00:12:52,204 --> 00:12:54,609
I didn't think I was gonna
ever wanna be with anyone again,
256
00:12:54,610 --> 00:12:57,859
but... I'm totally fine.
257
00:12:57,860 --> 00:13:01,119
Yeah, well, you sounded fine
three times this morning.
258
00:13:01,120 --> 00:13:03,329
- Up top, Ains, whoo!
- Oh, shit!
259
00:13:03,330 --> 00:13:05,539
Oh, my God. Andrew.
260
00:13:05,540 --> 00:13:08,719
Oh, you need to stop thinking about
your boss. It's like...
261
00:13:08,720 --> 00:13:10,889
No, no. He's here.
262
00:13:10,890 --> 00:13:13,639
♪ Get a little bit nasty ♪
263
00:13:13,640 --> 00:13:16,439
Hi, Andrew.
264
00:13:16,440 --> 00:13:19,325
What a fun surprise. Do
you come to G-A-Y often?
265
00:13:19,326 --> 00:13:21,159
I like the subtlety of the name.
266
00:13:21,160 --> 00:13:23,119
- Hello, I'm Andrew.
- Hi.
267
00:13:23,120 --> 00:13:24,919
Hi, I'm Ainsley.
268
00:13:24,920 --> 00:13:26,379
Oh, I know you.
269
00:13:26,380 --> 00:13:28,629
Ah, yes, it's me, Andrew Aldridge,
270
00:13:28,630 --> 00:13:31,759
the first openly gay MP in my party.
271
00:13:31,760 --> 00:13:34,979
It's quite a story. If we had time...
272
00:13:34,980 --> 00:13:36,859
The year was 2002.
273
00:13:36,860 --> 00:13:40,359
Nicole Kidman was about
to win the Oscar by a nose.
274
00:13:40,360 --> 00:13:42,539
Well, that's just it.
275
00:13:42,540 --> 00:13:45,485
It was 2002. What have
you done since then?
276
00:13:45,486 --> 00:13:46,609
I beg your pardon?
277
00:13:46,610 --> 00:13:49,169
Since coming out, you've completely
forgotten about people like me.
278
00:13:49,170 --> 00:13:51,509
I think you're mistaken.
279
00:13:51,510 --> 00:13:54,219
My voting record is impeccable.
280
00:13:54,220 --> 00:13:57,109
Yes, on issues like cutting
inheritance tax for millionaires,
281
00:13:57,110 --> 00:13:59,069
and "keeping Britain British".
282
00:13:59,070 --> 00:14:02,239
Uh, Maya, your friend doesn't
know what he's talking about.
283
00:14:02,240 --> 00:14:04,239
He's... he's more Ainsley's friend.
284
00:14:04,240 --> 00:14:06,249
You may have been brave once,
285
00:14:06,250 --> 00:14:09,629
but now you only help
rich, old white people.
286
00:14:09,630 --> 00:14:11,259
You're a gay dinosaur.
287
00:14:11,260 --> 00:14:13,389
That's why everyone calls you LGBT-Rex.
288
00:14:13,390 --> 00:14:14,663
That's enough.
289
00:14:14,664 --> 00:14:19,269
I will not be spoken down
to by a man in a mesh top.
290
00:14:22,320 --> 00:14:25,869
Okay, well, I think we've all
learned a lot here tonight at G-A-Y,
291
00:14:25,870 --> 00:14:28,289
and so Ainsley and I
are gonna say B-Y-E. Bye.
292
00:14:28,290 --> 00:14:30,049
Aww... oh. Nice to meet you.
293
00:14:32,550 --> 00:14:34,719
- You don't remember me, do you?
- No.
294
00:14:34,720 --> 00:14:36,599
Halloween two years ago.
295
00:14:36,600 --> 00:14:38,899
I was Britney, Slave 4 U era.
296
00:14:38,900 --> 00:14:42,659
You were Richard Gere, An
Officer and a Gentleman.
297
00:14:42,660 --> 00:14:44,319
You kept your socks on.
298
00:14:44,320 --> 00:14:47,039
I thought we had a nice time.
299
00:14:47,040 --> 00:14:48,989
But I guess it's too much
to ask someone like you
300
00:14:48,990 --> 00:14:51,089
to remember someone like me.
301
00:15:04,780 --> 00:15:08,119
Ta-da! I went a lot over budget!
302
00:15:08,120 --> 00:15:11,759
Well, I think, uh... I
think this is all right.
303
00:15:11,760 --> 00:15:14,509
All right?
304
00:15:14,510 --> 00:15:17,889
Do you know how hard
it was to design a home
305
00:15:17,890 --> 00:15:20,269
for a gruff, monosyllabic oilman?
306
00:15:20,270 --> 00:15:21,609
No.
307
00:15:21,610 --> 00:15:24,359
Very hard. I want compliments.
308
00:15:24,360 --> 00:15:26,369
Well, um, all right.
309
00:15:26,370 --> 00:15:29,039
I'd say, um, yeah, I think this works.
310
00:15:30,250 --> 00:15:32,629
Well, that is effusive for me.
311
00:15:32,630 --> 00:15:34,219
Oh, come on.
312
00:15:34,220 --> 00:15:36,259
You spent half an hour
describing the nuance
313
00:15:36,260 --> 00:15:39,479
of Clint Eastwood's performance
in The Outlaw Josey Wales.
314
00:15:39,480 --> 00:15:41,229
People just give too many compliments.
315
00:15:41,230 --> 00:15:44,739
Everyone's like, "That's
amazeballs. I'm #dead."
316
00:15:44,740 --> 00:15:47,084
I'll, uh, I'll tell somebody
something's good when I...
317
00:15:47,085 --> 00:15:48,449
when I mean it.
318
00:15:48,450 --> 00:15:51,079
Hey, what's that?
319
00:15:51,080 --> 00:15:52,709
Is that Love Field?
320
00:15:52,710 --> 00:15:54,044
Yes.
321
00:15:54,045 --> 00:15:57,158
That is an artist
rendering from the 1950s.
322
00:15:57,159 --> 00:15:59,599
That's such a pretty
name for an airport.
323
00:15:59,600 --> 00:16:03,569
My father designed that building.
324
00:16:03,570 --> 00:16:06,199
I know, dummy. That's
why I put it on your wall.
325
00:16:06,200 --> 00:16:09,619
Ainsley Howard. Now, this?
326
00:16:09,620 --> 00:16:11,553
This is good.
327
00:16:11,554 --> 00:16:14,049
You're right. That does feel
better knowing you really mean it.
328
00:16:15,510 --> 00:16:16,825
So what's next?
329
00:16:19,060 --> 00:16:21,309
That's it.
330
00:16:21,310 --> 00:16:23,229
My work here is done.
331
00:16:23,230 --> 00:16:24,899
Really? You finished?
332
00:16:24,900 --> 00:16:26,989
I am.
333
00:16:26,990 --> 00:16:29,199
But it's been a real pleasure.
334
00:16:29,200 --> 00:16:30,910
I'm gonna miss working with you.
335
00:16:35,050 --> 00:16:38,049
The garden... you can
decorate the garden.
336
00:16:38,050 --> 00:16:40,639
Well, I'm not really a landscaper.
337
00:16:40,640 --> 00:16:43,229
Uh, well, I trust your eye.
338
00:16:43,230 --> 00:16:46,319
Okay. Well, it's your money.
I'm happy to spend it.
339
00:16:58,130 --> 00:17:01,059
Just look at this.
340
00:17:01,060 --> 00:17:04,439
Why do I hire young people if they
can't prevent things like this?
341
00:17:04,440 --> 00:17:06,189
You're supposed to keep me awoken.
342
00:17:06,190 --> 00:17:08,069
Oh, do you mean woke?
343
00:17:08,070 --> 00:17:09,869
Do I?
344
00:17:09,870 --> 00:17:13,959
How dare that man say that
I only help people like me.
345
00:17:13,960 --> 00:17:15,281
How do you explain my support
346
00:17:15,282 --> 00:17:17,695
for the women's flower club
or the children's library bus?
347
00:17:17,696 --> 00:17:20,429
Do I look like a woman or a child, Tony?
348
00:17:20,430 --> 00:17:23,019
Uh, it's Marcus...
349
00:17:23,020 --> 00:17:24,389
my... my name.
350
00:17:24,390 --> 00:17:26,229
Well, I can't speak for Tony,
351
00:17:26,230 --> 00:17:28,819
but maybe he's referring to your party's
352
00:17:28,820 --> 00:17:30,819
less than progressive stance
353
00:17:30,820 --> 00:17:33,449
on... everything.
354
00:17:33,450 --> 00:17:35,209
Oh, I just...
355
00:17:35,210 --> 00:17:38,379
I just hate that people
might think I'm the bad guy.
356
00:17:38,380 --> 00:17:40,929
I'm not the bad guy.
357
00:17:40,930 --> 00:17:43,679
I voted for Black History Week.
358
00:17:43,680 --> 00:17:46,059
- Month.
- A whole month?
359
00:17:46,060 --> 00:17:47,979
Well... That's wonderful.
360
00:17:47,980 --> 00:17:49,529
Can I just say that
361
00:17:49,530 --> 00:17:51,819
I'm thrilled that you're
concerned about this.
362
00:17:51,820 --> 00:17:54,079
I would love to help
you change your image.
363
00:17:54,080 --> 00:17:55,869
What do you suggest?
364
00:17:55,870 --> 00:17:59,419
Maybe you could pair a
suit with some fun sneakers.
365
00:17:59,420 --> 00:18:01,616
Or maybe you could support a cause
366
00:18:01,617 --> 00:18:03,349
that people wouldn't expect from you,
367
00:18:03,350 --> 00:18:07,229
like an at-risk youth
program or a women's shelter.
368
00:18:07,230 --> 00:18:10,529
Oh, yes. Good idea,
Maya. Compile a list.
369
00:18:10,530 --> 00:18:13,869
Uh, what about a struggling
community theater in Hounslow?
370
00:18:13,870 --> 00:18:15,409
What? No.
371
00:18:15,410 --> 00:18:17,209
I-I just don't think that's a good idea.
372
00:18:17,210 --> 00:18:18,549
Wait. What is it?
373
00:18:18,550 --> 00:18:20,259
It's a bunch of poor,
374
00:18:20,260 --> 00:18:22,549
ethnically diverse kids
doing Sound of Music.
375
00:18:22,550 --> 00:18:24,259
Picture it, sir... Muslims, Hindus,
376
00:18:24,260 --> 00:18:26,689
girls in headscarves,
risking everything to sing.
377
00:18:26,690 --> 00:18:28,859
Probably. Think of the photo op.
378
00:18:28,860 --> 00:18:30,529
Sounds perfect.
379
00:18:30,530 --> 00:18:32,029
Yeah, or not.
380
00:18:32,030 --> 00:18:33,829
I can... I can come up
with some other options.
381
00:18:33,830 --> 00:18:35,959
She's just jealous that she
didn't think of it first.
382
00:18:37,960 --> 00:18:40,089
The decision is made.
383
00:18:40,090 --> 00:18:42,339
These children are in need.
384
00:18:42,340 --> 00:18:43,799
Well done, Marcus.
385
00:18:53,070 --> 00:18:56,539
Mr. Duffy, is it true
that you told a parent
386
00:18:56,540 --> 00:18:58,459
if they disliked your teaching style,
387
00:18:58,460 --> 00:19:00,289
they could transfer their child to,
388
00:19:00,290 --> 00:19:04,009
"Saint I-Don't-Give-A-Shit's"?
389
00:19:04,010 --> 00:19:06,099
Headmaster Mould, I'm
kinda going through
390
00:19:06,100 --> 00:19:09,399
some unprecedented relationship trauma.
391
00:19:09,400 --> 00:19:11,779
Would you ever consider
a paid sabbatical?
392
00:19:11,780 --> 00:19:13,149
No.
393
00:19:13,150 --> 00:19:15,869
This academy stayed
open during the Blitz.
394
00:19:15,870 --> 00:19:18,789
A math teacher confronted
a German paratrooper
395
00:19:18,790 --> 00:19:21,129
and beat him to death
with a trigonometry book.
396
00:19:21,130 --> 00:19:22,709
Oh, my God.
397
00:19:22,710 --> 00:19:24,383
The point is, you're
not getting time off
398
00:19:24,384 --> 00:19:26,809
just because some girl you've
dated for a month has dumped you.
399
00:19:26,810 --> 00:19:28,229
How did you know that?
400
00:19:28,230 --> 00:19:30,399
Because you told everyone.
401
00:19:30,400 --> 00:19:32,729
Mr. Duffy, you leave me no choice
402
00:19:32,730 --> 00:19:35,199
but to assign another teacher
to monitor your classes
403
00:19:35,200 --> 00:19:37,119
until you find yourself.
404
00:19:37,120 --> 00:19:39,499
Oh, yeah? Who?
405
00:19:39,500 --> 00:19:41,499
Hello, Duffy.
406
00:19:49,600 --> 00:19:51,309
Hi, Tabby.
407
00:19:51,310 --> 00:19:55,489
Okay, the next cue is on page 32.
408
00:19:55,490 --> 00:19:58,489
And lights out.
409
00:20:01,630 --> 00:20:02,959
Bruv, come on.
410
00:20:02,960 --> 00:20:05,549
Oh! Oh, shit. Sorry, bro.
411
00:20:05,550 --> 00:20:07,549
Go to the next cue. Stop texting Fatima.
412
00:20:07,550 --> 00:20:09,889
There it is...
413
00:20:09,890 --> 00:20:13,069
that anger and resentment that
you keep saying doesn't exist.
414
00:20:13,070 --> 00:20:14,939
Let it go, my brother. Let
it come outside your body.
415
00:20:14,940 --> 00:20:16,859
I'm only angry because
it's taken you an hour
416
00:20:16,860 --> 00:20:19,449
to get through five light cues.
417
00:20:19,450 --> 00:20:21,159
You're probably right.
418
00:20:21,160 --> 00:20:23,285
Let me get to... here it
comes. Here it comes, yeah?
419
00:20:23,286 --> 00:20:24,709
Here we go.
420
00:20:24,710 --> 00:20:26,719
Thank you.
421
00:20:26,720 --> 00:20:30,219
Okay, and then the lights
come up on page 33.
422
00:20:30,220 --> 00:20:32,729
She's funny.
423
00:20:32,730 --> 00:20:34,819
Bash, turn on the lights!
424
00:20:34,820 --> 00:20:36,859
If you could give
us a tour and maybe tell us
425
00:20:36,860 --> 00:20:38,949
a little bit about what you
guys do here, 'cause we...
426
00:20:38,950 --> 00:20:41,079
- Maya?
- Yeah, well, of course.
427
00:20:51,690 --> 00:20:52,859
Well, we lost
428
00:20:52,860 --> 00:20:55,268
our local authority funding
a couple of years ago,
429
00:20:55,269 --> 00:20:57,949
and we haven't been able to raise
enough money to do the repairs.
430
00:20:57,950 --> 00:21:00,199
Oh, that's just heartbreaking.
431
00:21:00,200 --> 00:21:03,459
Uh, you voted for that
austerity bill, sir.
432
00:21:03,460 --> 00:21:05,879
Well, this is exactly
433
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:08,629
what I'm looking for.
434
00:21:08,630 --> 00:21:11,349
I'd like to personally fund
435
00:21:11,350 --> 00:21:15,359
the renovations of this whole theater.
436
00:21:15,360 --> 00:21:18,069
How does the "Andrew Aldridge
437
00:21:18,070 --> 00:21:21,079
Hounslow Community Theatre" sound?
438
00:21:21,080 --> 00:21:22,123
Are you serious?
439
00:21:22,124 --> 00:21:24,709
Or should it be the "Andrew
Aldridge Ethnically Diverse
440
00:21:24,710 --> 00:21:27,589
Community Theatre for
Low-Income Urchins"?
441
00:21:27,590 --> 00:21:29,259
No, no. Mine's better.
442
00:21:29,260 --> 00:21:30,533
Give me a tour.
443
00:21:30,534 --> 00:21:33,019
Well, yes. Let's start with the wings.
444
00:21:33,020 --> 00:21:35,939
- Love the...
- Please, watch your step.
445
00:21:35,940 --> 00:21:37,983
Thanks so much for this.
446
00:21:37,984 --> 00:21:39,692
After the way we left
things at the wedding,
447
00:21:39,693 --> 00:21:40,831
I didn't think I'd see you again.
448
00:21:40,832 --> 00:21:42,789
Trust me. I had nothing to do with this.
449
00:21:42,790 --> 00:21:45,209
This is literally the last
place on Earth I wanna be.
450
00:21:45,210 --> 00:21:47,549
Wait, so you're not here because of me?
451
00:21:47,550 --> 00:21:49,089
No, I'm here for work,
452
00:21:49,090 --> 00:21:52,599
and maybe some kind
of cosmic punishment?
453
00:21:52,600 --> 00:21:54,179
Maya!
454
00:21:54,180 --> 00:21:56,989
Ooh, you looking good, girl. Ooh.
455
00:21:56,990 --> 00:21:59,072
I didn't mean that as a come
on, by the way, because
456
00:21:59,073 --> 00:22:01,619
I'm taken now, so...
457
00:22:01,620 --> 00:22:03,909
Sorry, mate. I keep rubbing
salt in your wounds, innit?
458
00:22:03,910 --> 00:22:06,119
Uh, Fatima and I broke up.
459
00:22:06,120 --> 00:22:07,669
Turns out she's in love with this guy.
460
00:22:07,670 --> 00:22:09,509
Huh?
461
00:22:09,510 --> 00:22:12,719
She in love with me? She told you that?
462
00:22:12,720 --> 00:22:14,219
Bruv, can we have a minute?
463
00:22:14,220 --> 00:22:16,849
Yes, you can.
464
00:22:16,850 --> 00:22:18,953
Look, this whole thing with Fatima, I...
465
00:22:18,954 --> 00:22:20,902
It's none of my business.
I-I don't care.
466
00:22:20,903 --> 00:22:22,029
Do you two know each other?
467
00:22:22,030 --> 00:22:24,239
- No, not really.
- Yes, we have mutual friends.
468
00:22:24,240 --> 00:22:27,459
Oh, that's lucky. In that case,
Maya can be my point person here,
469
00:22:27,460 --> 00:22:29,919
overseeing the renovations
470
00:22:29,920 --> 00:22:33,219
and handling any press interest.
471
00:22:33,220 --> 00:22:35,639
Wait, no. This is Marcus's project.
472
00:22:35,640 --> 00:22:37,229
He should be the one to see it through.
473
00:22:37,230 --> 00:22:39,649
Yep, but you already
have a relationship here.
474
00:22:39,650 --> 00:22:42,779
Plus, given the optics,
475
00:22:42,780 --> 00:22:45,580
you're a little more au courant.
476
00:22:47,120 --> 00:22:49,419
Are you saying I'm too white?
477
00:22:49,420 --> 00:22:51,799
Uh, well, legally, I'm
not allowed to say that,
478
00:22:51,800 --> 00:22:53,219
but yes, that's all I'm saying.
479
00:22:53,220 --> 00:22:54,679
- Yeah.
- Shall we?
480
00:22:54,680 --> 00:22:58,189
Yes, let's come through the auditorium,
481
00:22:58,190 --> 00:23:00,569
and I'll take you out to the...
482
00:23:00,570 --> 00:23:03,780
I guess we're gonna be seeing a
lot more of you 'round here, then.
483
00:23:08,000 --> 00:23:10,999
Urbs antiqua fuit.
484
00:23:11,000 --> 00:23:14,389
Urbs antiqua fuit.
485
00:23:14,390 --> 00:23:16,059
That's what I said.
486
00:23:16,060 --> 00:23:19,400
No, it isn't. Your
pronunciation's terrible.
487
00:23:23,004 --> 00:23:25,527
_
488
00:23:25,528 --> 00:23:29,959
_
489
00:23:29,960 --> 00:23:31,589
I hate to side with Miss,
490
00:23:31,590 --> 00:23:34,469
but I do think lessons
could be more rigorous.
491
00:23:34,470 --> 00:23:36,679
I couldn't understand any of that.
492
00:23:42,900 --> 00:23:45,029
Hey!
493
00:23:45,030 --> 00:23:47,159
Hey, you!
494
00:23:47,160 --> 00:23:48,789
Stop!
495
00:23:48,790 --> 00:23:51,959
You narc! You narc!
496
00:23:51,960 --> 00:23:54,215
Will you please stop
shouting in a public square?
497
00:23:54,216 --> 00:23:55,299
This isn't Italy.
498
00:23:55,300 --> 00:23:57,219
You grassed on me to the headmaster,
499
00:23:57,220 --> 00:24:00,349
and now he has Tabby spying on my ass!
500
00:24:00,350 --> 00:24:02,609
Well, she obviously isn't
doing a very good job.
501
00:24:02,610 --> 00:24:04,649
You still appear unhinged and unwashed.
502
00:24:04,650 --> 00:24:06,949
You know what? I'm sorry.
503
00:24:06,950 --> 00:24:08,449
I just lost my girlfriend,
504
00:24:08,450 --> 00:24:10,499
and you of all people should understand.
505
00:24:10,500 --> 00:24:12,669
Are you taking the piss?
506
00:24:14,130 --> 00:24:17,049
My husband died, you insensitive oaf!
507
00:24:17,050 --> 00:24:18,418
I have eggs my refrigerator
508
00:24:18,419 --> 00:24:20,284
that have lasted longer
than your relationship.
509
00:24:20,285 --> 00:24:22,229
I'm sorry. Shit!
510
00:24:22,230 --> 00:24:23,819
I'm sorry!
511
00:24:23,820 --> 00:24:25,609
Yes.
512
00:24:25,610 --> 00:24:26,989
I know it's not the same.
513
00:24:26,990 --> 00:24:29,829
It's just... it's just that Maya was...
514
00:24:29,830 --> 00:24:32,369
Oh, shut up and get over it.
515
00:24:32,370 --> 00:24:34,089
You're a hungover, 30-year-old man
516
00:24:34,090 --> 00:24:36,549
in stained trousers who
doesn't like his life.
517
00:24:36,550 --> 00:24:39,099
You can try to blame
Maya or Tabby or me,
518
00:24:39,100 --> 00:24:41,559
but the real person you
should be blaming is yourself.
519
00:24:41,560 --> 00:24:43,809
I say this as a friend.
520
00:24:43,810 --> 00:24:47,109
Get your shit together, you idiot!
521
00:26:02,050 --> 00:26:04,219
_
522
00:26:14,620 --> 00:26:17,629
_
523
00:26:30,650 --> 00:26:32,069
Tabby.
524
00:26:32,070 --> 00:26:35,199
Hey, Tabby.
525
00:26:35,200 --> 00:26:36,619
- Hi.
- What do you want, Duffy?
526
00:26:36,620 --> 00:26:38,459
I'm waiting for someone.
527
00:26:38,460 --> 00:26:40,589
I just wanna say I'm
so sorry about the way
528
00:26:40,590 --> 00:26:43,179
I handled things between us.
529
00:26:43,180 --> 00:26:45,219
And you should know that
I got what I deserved.
530
00:26:45,220 --> 00:26:47,350
Well, I appreciate you saying that.
531
00:26:49,650 --> 00:26:52,449
Yeah, so,
532
00:26:52,450 --> 00:26:56,409
I guess we're both, um, members
of the Lonely Hearts Club now, huh?
533
00:26:56,410 --> 00:26:59,379
What? Oh, no, I'm not single.
534
00:26:59,380 --> 00:27:01,799
Actually, I'm dating
another American guy.
535
00:27:01,800 --> 00:27:03,259
He's a writer too.
536
00:27:03,260 --> 00:27:05,889
Oh, awesome.
537
00:27:05,890 --> 00:27:07,559
Anyone I would know?
538
00:27:07,560 --> 00:27:10,689
Probably not... he writes
mostly romance novels.
539
00:27:10,690 --> 00:27:13,609
Oh, this is me.
540
00:27:13,610 --> 00:27:16,789
Well, see you later, Duffy.
541
00:27:25,470 --> 00:27:28,139
You know, you really
don't have to do that.
542
00:27:28,140 --> 00:27:31,359
Yeah, I know, but I felt kinda
guilty watching Mrs. Ali do it,
543
00:27:31,360 --> 00:27:33,569
especially when she kept
saying, "Ow, my arthritis."
544
00:27:33,570 --> 00:27:36,630
Well, I'm sorry you got stuck helping us.
545
00:27:39,370 --> 00:27:41,249
I'm not.
546
00:27:41,250 --> 00:27:44,259
Contrary to what Andrew thinks,
I didn't get into politics
547
00:27:44,260 --> 00:27:46,849
to help him decide which tie
makes him look less racist.
548
00:27:48,470 --> 00:27:50,462
So, why did you get into it?
549
00:27:52,400 --> 00:27:54,069
Uh, to help people?
550
00:27:54,070 --> 00:27:57,279
Really? Are you a do-gooder?
551
00:27:57,280 --> 00:27:59,119
Well, have you thought
about doing something else?
552
00:27:59,120 --> 00:28:00,789
Yeah, I've thought about it...
553
00:28:00,790 --> 00:28:03,499
called a headhunter and everything,
554
00:28:03,500 --> 00:28:06,139
but since Andrew seems
to have found a heart,
555
00:28:06,140 --> 00:28:09,059
I'm actually enjoying the job.
556
00:28:09,060 --> 00:28:12,689
Well, I'm glad you're here.
557
00:28:12,690 --> 00:28:14,279
Me too.
558
00:28:17,740 --> 00:28:20,039
- Sorry about that!
- Come on, bruv!
559
00:28:27,510 --> 00:28:29,509
Oh.
560
00:28:29,510 --> 00:28:31,269
What are you doing here?
561
00:28:31,270 --> 00:28:34,939
You finally thought
of a decent comeback?
562
00:28:34,940 --> 00:28:36,359
Only took you a month.
563
00:28:36,360 --> 00:28:37,619
Uh, no.
564
00:28:37,620 --> 00:28:40,619
I'd like to apologize.
565
00:28:40,620 --> 00:28:42,829
For what?
566
00:28:42,830 --> 00:28:45,299
Brexit? Austerity?
567
00:28:45,300 --> 00:28:47,009
Fracking?
568
00:28:47,010 --> 00:28:49,509
That waistcoat?
569
00:28:49,510 --> 00:28:51,889
Oh, no. I'd never apologize
for this waistcoat.
570
00:28:51,890 --> 00:28:57,489
I've had it since university,
and I never had to let it out.
571
00:28:57,490 --> 00:29:00,279
No, I'm... sorry
572
00:29:00,280 --> 00:29:03,169
I didn't remember you.
573
00:29:03,170 --> 00:29:05,709
Um,
574
00:29:05,710 --> 00:29:09,509
I'm not accustomed to, uh, dating.
575
00:29:09,510 --> 00:29:11,349
In my line of work,
576
00:29:11,350 --> 00:29:14,099
a personal life is a liability,
577
00:29:14,100 --> 00:29:18,819
especially if you're... like us.
578
00:29:18,820 --> 00:29:21,829
So, I'd like to move on.
579
00:29:21,830 --> 00:29:26,249
There's a production of The
Sound of Music this Saturday...
580
00:29:26,250 --> 00:29:27,443
Stop.
581
00:29:27,444 --> 00:29:29,017
You don't really want to date me.
582
00:29:29,018 --> 00:29:32,219
You just want to make
yourself feel better.
583
00:29:32,220 --> 00:29:34,269
Well, I'd rather you left me out of it.
584
00:29:36,860 --> 00:29:40,069
I'm sorry. I... I
won't bother you again.
585
00:29:57,150 --> 00:29:58,443
Kashif!
586
00:29:58,444 --> 00:30:00,779
Kashif, I know you're in
'cause I heard the toilet flush.
587
00:30:00,780 --> 00:30:02,829
What...
588
00:30:02,830 --> 00:30:04,909
Bruv,
589
00:30:04,910 --> 00:30:07,459
I got some bad news.
590
00:30:10,760 --> 00:30:12,599
Go there.
591
00:30:12,600 --> 00:30:14,139
It's real bad.
592
00:30:14,140 --> 00:30:17,189
You lost all of the
lighting cues I gave you?
593
00:30:17,190 --> 00:30:20,109
Okay, now I have two
pieces of bad news for you.
594
00:30:20,110 --> 00:30:22,279
Listen, man. Me and
Fatima are getting serious.
595
00:30:22,280 --> 00:30:24,080
Oh, God, not this again.
596
00:30:24,081 --> 00:30:26,419
Bro, we had the families meet up
last night, and let me tell you this.
597
00:30:26,420 --> 00:30:28,339
It could not have gone better.
598
00:30:28,340 --> 00:30:30,549
I know you must be gutted
to hear that. I'm very sorry.
599
00:30:30,550 --> 00:30:33,680
Bash, how many times do I have
to tell you I'm happy for you two?
600
00:30:35,600 --> 00:30:37,099
Are you serious?
601
00:30:37,100 --> 00:30:39,359
You got no lingering emotions?
602
00:30:39,360 --> 00:30:41,319
No feelings of utter emascula...
603
00:30:41,320 --> 00:30:43,320
For the love of God, no. I like Maya.
604
00:30:45,330 --> 00:30:47,249
I could see that, yeah.
Oh, hold on a minute.
605
00:30:47,250 --> 00:30:49,879
Ain't she your ex-fiancée's...
606
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:52,129
Yeah. Exactly.
607
00:30:52,130 --> 00:30:54,559
Shit.
608
00:30:54,560 --> 00:30:56,679
Sit down. Sit down. You
know what, my brother?
609
00:30:56,680 --> 00:30:59,359
Listen to me. Don't stress about it.
610
00:30:59,360 --> 00:31:01,439
Listen, if it's meant to be,
611
00:31:01,440 --> 00:31:03,659
you two will find
your way to each other.
612
00:31:03,660 --> 00:31:05,949
- I hope you're right, man.
- Yeah.
613
00:31:05,950 --> 00:31:09,539
And listen, man, I... I'm so glad
that you're over Fatima, you know?
614
00:31:10,704 --> 00:31:13,513
'Cause here's the thing... our
chaperone cancelled tonight.
615
00:31:15,390 --> 00:31:17,479
You know, um, Basheer, it's...
616
00:31:17,480 --> 00:31:19,399
it's very reassuring
for a woman to know that
617
00:31:19,400 --> 00:31:21,859
her man can escape a room
in under half an hour.
618
00:31:21,860 --> 00:31:23,859
- It's very important.
- Yeah.
619
00:31:23,860 --> 00:31:27,079
I also know exactly what to
do in a Purge situation.
620
00:31:27,080 --> 00:31:28,789
- Okay.
- Go hiding.
621
00:31:30,984 --> 00:31:32,684
_
622
00:31:33,450 --> 00:31:37,474
_
623
00:31:37,475 --> 00:31:39,628
- Funny.
- Yeah, hilarious.
624
00:31:39,629 --> 00:31:40,652
Mm.
625
00:31:40,653 --> 00:31:42,689
_
626
00:31:53,800 --> 00:31:56,969
Hey, your honeymoon photos are just
outtakes from Fifty Shades of Grey.
627
00:31:56,970 --> 00:31:58,559
Were you at a nudist colony?
628
00:31:58,560 --> 00:32:01,189
No, this was just
Heathrow before we left.
629
00:32:01,190 --> 00:32:03,939
Hang on. I'm sure I
took some decent ones.
630
00:32:03,940 --> 00:32:06,029
Oh, cool, Craig's butt.
631
00:32:06,030 --> 00:32:07,489
It's like we're roommates again.
632
00:32:07,490 --> 00:32:09,829
Oh, look at you.
633
00:32:09,830 --> 00:32:12,129
What's up with the blazer?
Is it your confirmation?
634
00:32:12,130 --> 00:32:13,799
What? No.
635
00:32:13,800 --> 00:32:15,879
You know, can't a guy update his look?
636
00:32:15,880 --> 00:32:17,639
No. I'm the sharp dresser in the group.
637
00:32:17,640 --> 00:32:19,139
Stay in your lane, playboy.
638
00:32:19,140 --> 00:32:21,139
Well, I like it.
639
00:32:25,280 --> 00:32:26,699
Mm.
640
00:32:26,700 --> 00:32:30,409
So, how's our friend Andrew doing?
641
00:32:30,410 --> 00:32:33,289
He's good. You certainly
made an impression.
642
00:32:33,290 --> 00:32:35,549
- Doubt it.
- No, you did.
643
00:32:35,550 --> 00:32:38,679
He's now sponsoring the
renovation of a community theater
644
00:32:38,680 --> 00:32:40,849
in Hounslow because of
what you said to him.
645
00:32:40,850 --> 00:32:42,859
What? You sure it's not just a front
646
00:32:42,860 --> 00:32:44,859
so he can force immigrant
children to polish his silver?
647
00:32:44,860 --> 00:32:46,439
No, it's real.
648
00:32:46,440 --> 00:32:48,529
They're doing Sound of Music.
649
00:32:48,530 --> 00:32:50,829
You know, Andrew must
really value your opinion,
650
00:32:50,830 --> 00:32:51,909
'cause he pays me for mine,
651
00:32:51,910 --> 00:32:53,289
and still does not listen to it.
652
00:32:53,290 --> 00:32:56,049
Oh, no, no, no, no, no.
No more talk about Andrew.
653
00:32:56,050 --> 00:32:58,389
I hate him. He makes you
work, like, 90 hours a week.
654
00:32:58,390 --> 00:32:59,889
I never see her anymore.
655
00:32:59,890 --> 00:33:01,519
I know. I'm so sorry.
656
00:33:01,520 --> 00:33:03,689
It's just been so busy.
657
00:33:03,690 --> 00:33:05,348
Okay, well, last night, I had to eat
658
00:33:05,349 --> 00:33:07,239
dinner alone like a sad friend widow.
659
00:33:07,240 --> 00:33:09,829
I had to smell your sweater
yesterday to remember you.
660
00:33:09,830 --> 00:33:12,579
I'm so lame.
661
00:33:12,580 --> 00:33:14,589
Mm.
662
00:33:22,520 --> 00:33:24,650
- Oh, hi, Duffy.
- Yeah.
663
00:33:26,124 --> 00:33:27,667
I'm not stealing this.
664
00:33:27,668 --> 00:33:29,130
I-I left it here a couple weeks ago
665
00:33:29,131 --> 00:33:30,994
and Ainsley never drank it, so I just...
666
00:33:35,380 --> 00:33:37,919
It's really nice to see you.
667
00:33:37,920 --> 00:33:40,639
You too.
668
00:33:40,640 --> 00:33:42,979
Hey, I-I know I put you in an awkward...
669
00:33:42,980 --> 00:33:45,150
No, no. It's-it's fine. I'm over it.
670
00:33:48,900 --> 00:33:51,239
I really am over it.
671
00:33:51,240 --> 00:33:53,499
Ah, ooh, here's one at brunch,
672
00:33:53,500 --> 00:33:55,539
right before we had
sex in the omelet line.
673
00:33:55,540 --> 00:33:57,169
Oh, boy.
674
00:33:57,170 --> 00:33:58,370
- Oh, boy.
- It's gonna be bad.
675
00:34:01,850 --> 00:34:04,519
Huh. Well, this is interesting.
676
00:34:04,520 --> 00:34:07,229
Turns out Kew Gardens has the
oldest pot plant in the world.
677
00:34:07,230 --> 00:34:09,109
1770.
678
00:34:09,110 --> 00:34:11,529
Now that is a neat fact.
679
00:34:14,120 --> 00:34:15,829
- What?
- Nothing, no.
680
00:34:15,830 --> 00:34:19,299
You just always get so
excited about little facts.
681
00:34:19,300 --> 00:34:21,509
You remind me of my seventh
grade history teacher.
682
00:34:21,510 --> 00:34:23,809
- Hmm, don't love that.
- Oh, no, no.
683
00:34:23,810 --> 00:34:26,189
He was cute. All the
girls had a crush on him.
684
00:34:26,190 --> 00:34:27,809
Anyway, let's talk about your backyard.
685
00:34:27,810 --> 00:34:28,913
Sure.
686
00:34:28,914 --> 00:34:32,703
Um, is there anything you're
seeing that you like, or...
687
00:34:34,080 --> 00:34:37,669
Honestly, I... I hardly
know one flower from another.
688
00:34:37,670 --> 00:34:39,083
Same goes for wine.
689
00:34:39,084 --> 00:34:41,169
Oh, I... I don't know
anything about wine either.
690
00:34:41,170 --> 00:34:43,549
I mean, I pretend I do so
that I seem fancy, but...
691
00:34:43,550 --> 00:34:45,429
- Naturally.
- Honestly,
692
00:34:45,430 --> 00:34:47,849
my favorite is still the house
red from the Cracker Barrel.
693
00:34:47,850 --> 00:34:49,569
Oh, hell no.
694
00:34:49,570 --> 00:34:51,279
Yeah. Shit, yeah.
695
00:34:51,280 --> 00:34:52,819
- You're a Texas girl.
- Yeah.
696
00:34:52,820 --> 00:34:54,409
I had my first kiss in a Cracker Barrel.
697
00:34:54,410 --> 00:34:56,959
Oh, let me tell you
about a Texas first kiss.
698
00:34:56,960 --> 00:34:58,419
- Come on now.
- Okay.
699
00:34:58,420 --> 00:35:00,629
Mine was in the back of a pickup truck
700
00:35:00,630 --> 00:35:02,259
after a football game.
701
00:35:02,260 --> 00:35:04,759
- Classic.
- I got chiggers.
702
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,789
Yeah, you would.
703
00:35:08,690 --> 00:35:10,977
When I'm talking to you,
I feel like I'm back home.
704
00:35:12,450 --> 00:35:13,949
I feel like I'm home too.
705
00:35:27,560 --> 00:35:31,149
Been wanting to do that for a long time.
706
00:35:31,150 --> 00:35:32,859
I'm sorry.
707
00:35:32,860 --> 00:35:34,689
I'm seeing someone, and...
708
00:35:36,700 --> 00:35:39,959
I just can't.
709
00:35:39,960 --> 00:35:41,380
I'm sorry.
710
00:35:53,400 --> 00:35:55,449
Ah, there you are.
711
00:35:55,450 --> 00:35:58,079
Um, how far along are we
712
00:35:58,080 --> 00:36:00,789
on that Hounslow theater project?
713
00:36:00,790 --> 00:36:04,009
Uh, the opening night's
this weekend, remember?
714
00:36:04,010 --> 00:36:05,679
You're the guest of honor.
715
00:36:05,680 --> 00:36:08,147
I just ordered a hundred
cupcakes with your face on them.
716
00:36:08,148 --> 00:36:10,649
Oh, that's unfortunate.
717
00:36:10,650 --> 00:36:12,109
What is going on?
718
00:36:12,110 --> 00:36:14,649
Uh, the party whip reacted negatively
719
00:36:14,650 --> 00:36:16,869
to Andrew bankrolling
a theater in Hounslow.
720
00:36:16,870 --> 00:36:19,249
Of course he did. Why?
721
00:36:19,250 --> 00:36:22,079
Because it's an immigrant
neighborhood full of brown people?
722
00:36:22,080 --> 00:36:24,719
Uh, no, because it's one of
the opposition's constituencies.
723
00:36:24,720 --> 00:36:26,379
God, you're racist for even saying that.
724
00:36:26,380 --> 00:36:27,883
Oh, my God.
725
00:36:27,884 --> 00:36:28,985
Whatever the reason,
726
00:36:28,986 --> 00:36:31,479
this isn't worth jeopardizing
my position in the party.
727
00:36:31,480 --> 00:36:33,519
- Moving on.
- No, not moving on.
728
00:36:33,520 --> 00:36:35,989
You can't pull out right now, okay?
729
00:36:35,990 --> 00:36:38,949
If you're not there on
Saturday, no one will show.
730
00:36:38,950 --> 00:36:41,289
- No one will donate.
- Why do you care so much?
731
00:36:41,290 --> 00:36:43,249
You didn't want to do
this in the first place.
732
00:36:43,250 --> 00:36:45,509
Well, because Ka... everyone there
733
00:36:45,510 --> 00:36:49,349
has worked really hard, and
what am I gonna tell the kids?
734
00:36:49,350 --> 00:36:50,929
Oh, tell them I've been taken ill.
735
00:36:50,930 --> 00:36:53,019
That's what my father
did for all my birthdays.
736
00:36:53,020 --> 00:36:55,899
I'm sorry, but politics forces
us to make difficult decisions.
737
00:36:55,900 --> 00:36:58,739
- I've made up my mind.
- But you can't do this.
738
00:36:58,740 --> 00:37:01,369
Ah, I said I've made up my mind.
739
00:37:01,370 --> 00:37:04,169
If you don't agree, you
can find work elsewhere.
740
00:37:31,180 --> 00:37:34,189
Shit. Oh, shit, shit, shit.
741
00:37:34,190 --> 00:37:36,150
I can hear you saying "shit".
742
00:37:38,190 --> 00:37:40,779
Bryce. Hi.
743
00:37:40,780 --> 00:37:42,949
Uh, look, I'm sorry about yesterday.
744
00:37:42,950 --> 00:37:44,999
I didn't know you were seeing somebody.
745
00:37:45,000 --> 00:37:47,419
But I don't regret it.
746
00:37:47,420 --> 00:37:49,719
I like you,
747
00:37:49,720 --> 00:37:52,009
and I'd be mad at myself if I...
748
00:37:52,010 --> 00:37:55,020
if I let you walk away
without telling you how I feel.
749
00:37:57,320 --> 00:37:59,489
Well, I'm sorry too for
750
00:37:59,490 --> 00:38:02,029
giving you the wrong impression.
751
00:38:02,030 --> 00:38:06,129
I am dating someone, and it's serious.
752
00:38:06,130 --> 00:38:08,760
Totally understand. No hard feelings.
753
00:38:10,680 --> 00:38:14,020
So I guess you should find
somebody else to finish your garden.
754
00:38:15,480 --> 00:38:18,319
I never cared about the garden, Ainsley.
755
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:37,479
Oh, don't bother to knock. A
closed door is but a suggestion.
756
00:38:37,480 --> 00:38:40,029
Listen, if you want to
fire me, you can fire me...
757
00:38:40,030 --> 00:38:41,909
- You're fired.
- But let me talk first.
758
00:38:41,910 --> 00:38:44,489
You made a promise to those kids.
759
00:38:44,490 --> 00:38:45,909
You can't do this.
760
00:38:45,910 --> 00:38:47,999
Do you think this makes me feel good?
761
00:38:48,000 --> 00:38:50,459
I saw that cute little
Sikh boy who played Kurt.
762
00:38:50,460 --> 00:38:52,679
He kept pushing up his little glasses.
763
00:38:52,680 --> 00:38:55,059
- So help him.
- There is more at stake.
764
00:38:55,060 --> 00:38:56,849
I have my seat to think of.
765
00:38:56,850 --> 00:38:58,729
What is the point of having a seat
766
00:38:58,730 --> 00:39:01,189
if you don't use it to help people?
767
00:39:01,190 --> 00:39:04,779
Don't lecture me. I've been in
office since before you were born.
768
00:39:04,780 --> 00:39:06,079
The problem with your generation
769
00:39:06,080 --> 00:39:08,459
is you don't know what
a hard choice looks like.
770
00:39:08,460 --> 00:39:09,786
First of all,
771
00:39:09,787 --> 00:39:12,049
my generation is drowning
in your generation's debt,
772
00:39:12,050 --> 00:39:14,049
and we're all gonna
die of climate change.
773
00:39:14,050 --> 00:39:16,679
Second of all, "It is incumbent on us
774
00:39:16,680 --> 00:39:19,689
as public servants to give
voice to the voiceless."
775
00:39:19,690 --> 00:39:21,609
Oh, and who said that? Oprah?
776
00:39:21,610 --> 00:39:23,659
Chimamanda Ngozi Adichie?
777
00:39:23,660 --> 00:39:26,159
Whoa, you know how to pronounce that?
778
00:39:26,160 --> 00:39:29,499
And no, it's not her anyway.
779
00:39:31,130 --> 00:39:34,549
It is incumbent on us as public servants
780
00:39:34,550 --> 00:39:37,519
to give voice to the voiceless,
781
00:39:37,520 --> 00:39:40,189
and to remember that we govern and act
782
00:39:40,190 --> 00:39:42,649
on behalf of the people.
783
00:39:42,650 --> 00:39:45,449
We must elevate those who cannot rise
784
00:39:45,450 --> 00:39:47,539
on their own.
785
00:39:47,540 --> 00:39:51,289
I promise to carry out
my duties, to serve,
786
00:39:51,290 --> 00:39:54,929
and to represent each
and every one of them.
787
00:39:57,140 --> 00:40:01,150
You know, I can't disagree
with that handsome bastard.
788
00:40:07,080 --> 00:40:10,289
Are we all ready, little Von Trapplets?
789
00:40:10,290 --> 00:40:13,459
And, ooh, there we are.
790
00:40:13,460 --> 00:40:16,429
Now, smile for the cameras,
especially the nuns.
791
00:40:24,236 --> 00:40:27,159
Well, I just think... well, I think
it's gonna be absolutely marvelous.
792
00:40:27,160 --> 00:40:29,539
I think your children
are absolutely terrific.
793
00:40:29,540 --> 00:40:32,919
It's going to be... um,
would you, uh, just excuse me?
794
00:40:32,920 --> 00:40:34,550
Just for a moment?
795
00:40:38,970 --> 00:40:42,149
You came.
796
00:40:42,150 --> 00:40:44,269
I'm sorry.
797
00:40:44,270 --> 00:40:45,649
I was a basic bitch,
798
00:40:45,650 --> 00:40:48,779
but... well, you forgot me so easily,
799
00:40:48,780 --> 00:40:52,709
and... and it hurt,
800
00:40:52,710 --> 00:40:55,509
'cause I didn't forget you.
801
00:40:55,510 --> 00:40:57,969
Yes, I suppose you were
somewhat of a basic bitch,
802
00:40:57,970 --> 00:41:00,349
but, um,
803
00:41:00,350 --> 00:41:01,746
perhaps I deserved it.
804
00:41:04,440 --> 00:41:06,779
So you never really date?
805
00:41:06,780 --> 00:41:08,449
How can that be true?
806
00:41:08,450 --> 00:41:11,369
Well, I became an MP 30 years ago.
807
00:41:11,370 --> 00:41:14,499
Back then, we didn't
have what we have now...
808
00:41:14,500 --> 00:41:17,129
marriage, adoption.
809
00:41:17,130 --> 00:41:19,599
Sam Smith would've been
forced to marry Adele.
810
00:41:19,600 --> 00:41:22,044
But think of the wonderful
Christmas album
811
00:41:22,045 --> 00:41:24,100
they would have made.
812
00:41:26,150 --> 00:41:28,779
I'm glad you came tonight,
813
00:41:28,780 --> 00:41:31,079
Tony,
814
00:41:31,080 --> 00:41:34,209
because you're someone
worth remembering.
815
00:41:37,050 --> 00:41:39,090
Uh, shall we, um...
816
00:41:51,870 --> 00:41:56,839
♪ So somewhere in my youth ♪
817
00:41:56,840 --> 00:42:01,509
♪ Or childhood ♪
818
00:42:01,510 --> 00:42:04,429
♪ I must have done ♪
819
00:42:04,430 --> 00:42:09,609
♪ Something good ♪
820
00:42:11,740 --> 00:42:16,459
♪ Nothing comes from nothing ♪
821
00:42:16,460 --> 00:42:20,629
♪ Nothing ever could ♪
822
00:42:20,630 --> 00:42:26,309
♪ So somewhere in my youth ♪
823
00:42:31,570 --> 00:42:34,869
♪ I must have done ♪
824
00:42:34,870 --> 00:42:37,879
♪ Something ♪
825
00:42:37,880 --> 00:42:42,090
♪ Good ♪
826
00:42:55,330 --> 00:42:57,879
Oh, excuse me.
827
00:42:57,880 --> 00:43:00,549
Hey, that was the greatest
thing I've ever seen,
828
00:43:00,550 --> 00:43:02,549
and I've seen Chicago 78 times.
829
00:43:02,550 --> 00:43:04,509
And what did Andrew think?
830
00:43:04,510 --> 00:43:08,769
He said that we did something
really important tonight.
831
00:43:08,770 --> 00:43:12,199
We? You tried to kill this yesterday.
832
00:43:12,200 --> 00:43:13,869
Yes.
833
00:43:13,870 --> 00:43:16,449
And it's a testament to
the strength of our idea
834
00:43:16,450 --> 00:43:19,079
that it succeeded nonetheless...
835
00:43:19,080 --> 00:43:21,510
Oh, here he is!
836
00:43:24,850 --> 00:43:27,179
- Well, you didn't suck.
- Thanks, bro.
837
00:43:27,180 --> 00:43:30,269
- Wonderful job, beta.
- Thanks, Dad.
838
00:43:30,270 --> 00:43:34,069
It good to have hobbies...
like me and my checkers club.
839
00:43:49,675 --> 00:43:53,699
_
840
00:43:55,320 --> 00:43:58,330
_
841
00:43:58,331 --> 00:44:00,329
_
842
00:44:10,940 --> 00:44:14,239
_
843
00:44:16,620 --> 00:44:18,620
_
844
00:44:22,170 --> 00:44:23,879
Take care. Good to see you.
845
00:44:23,880 --> 00:44:26,389
Bye.
846
00:44:26,390 --> 00:44:28,559
Hi. I'm gonna head off.
847
00:44:28,560 --> 00:44:32,189
But I just... I just wanted to say
848
00:44:32,190 --> 00:44:34,779
you were really good.
849
00:44:34,780 --> 00:44:37,869
Thank you.
850
00:44:37,870 --> 00:44:40,199
Uh, before you go,
851
00:44:40,200 --> 00:44:42,209
can I show you something?
852
00:44:55,230 --> 00:44:57,660
- What?
- Look.
853
00:45:02,210 --> 00:45:05,089
Oh, cool.
854
00:45:05,090 --> 00:45:06,969
I did it when I was 10.
855
00:45:09,510 --> 00:45:11,599
I basically lived here when I was a kid.
856
00:45:11,600 --> 00:45:13,129
Oh, that's nice.
857
00:45:15,530 --> 00:45:18,109
Thank you for everything.
858
00:45:18,110 --> 00:45:20,539
Oh, I didn't do anything.
859
00:45:20,540 --> 00:45:22,159
Yes, you did.
860
00:45:22,160 --> 00:45:24,249
You gave me the courage to act again,
861
00:45:24,250 --> 00:45:27,219
even if it is only community theater.
862
00:45:27,220 --> 00:45:30,049
I'm happy, and it's all because of you.
863
00:46:39,190 --> 00:46:41,223
Go to bed.
864
00:46:41,224 --> 00:46:49,224
- Synced and corrected by Firefly -
- www.addic7ed.com -
62759
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