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1
00:00:05,070 --> 00:00:07,404
Burning up in this traffic jam
2
00:00:07,429 --> 00:00:09,560
I'm-a get to you when I can
3
00:00:09,585 --> 00:00:11,929
Sorry, baby, I'm running late
4
00:00:11,954 --> 00:00:14,210
But I promise I'm on my way
5
00:00:14,235 --> 00:00:15,951
And I've got the juice for you
6
00:00:15,976 --> 00:00:17,882
(SIGHS)
7
00:00:17,907 --> 00:00:20,577
"This next question is asking the reader
8
00:00:20,602 --> 00:00:24,521
"to make an inference about a character
9
00:00:24,546 --> 00:00:26,877
based on their..."
10
00:00:27,632 --> 00:00:29,154
Okay.
11
00:00:29,179 --> 00:00:32,748
You have officially completed
all of your GED classes.
12
00:00:32,773 --> 00:00:34,185
Congratulations.
13
00:00:34,217 --> 00:00:37,875
You are by far the best
students I've ever had.
14
00:00:38,656 --> 00:00:40,187
As you know,
15
00:00:40,212 --> 00:00:44,209
the test is tomorrow and it is
seven and a half hours long,
16
00:00:44,234 --> 00:00:47,343
so... be sure to bring lunch and dinner.
17
00:00:48,261 --> 00:00:50,507
Oh. Oh, Ken?
18
00:00:51,562 --> 00:00:52,757
Hey, Ken?
19
00:00:52,782 --> 00:00:54,879
I thought you said the
test was on Sunday.
20
00:00:54,904 --> 00:00:57,560
It was on Sunday, but as I was
telling the class last week,
21
00:00:57,585 --> 00:00:59,476
while you were asleep,
they have to get the rats
22
00:00:59,501 --> 00:01:00,679
out of the walls on Sunday,
23
00:01:00,704 --> 00:01:02,982
so they moved the test to tomorrow.
24
00:01:03,007 --> 00:01:04,508
So, here's the thing,
my friend is throwing
25
00:01:04,532 --> 00:01:06,935
an island party tomorrow
and she's really scary.
26
00:01:06,960 --> 00:01:09,020
If you knew her, you would
know why I can't miss it,
27
00:01:09,052 --> 00:01:11,437
but I can take the test
literally any other day.
28
00:01:11,462 --> 00:01:14,287
Yeah, I'll just call the Board
of Education and let them know
29
00:01:14,312 --> 00:01:16,648
that you've got a party to
go to so they have to...
30
00:01:16,673 --> 00:01:19,143
Why am I doing this?
I just want to go home.
31
00:01:19,336 --> 00:01:21,105
You know, the-the test is tomorrow.
32
00:01:21,130 --> 00:01:23,700
If you skip it, there'll be
another one in six months.
33
00:01:23,725 --> 00:01:25,046
Watch out for that pole.
34
00:01:26,421 --> 00:01:30,421
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
35
00:01:31,698 --> 00:01:34,123
(EXHALES) Where is this idiot mailman?
36
00:01:34,148 --> 00:01:35,646
- (COUGHS)
- (DOOR OPENS)
37
00:01:35,671 --> 00:01:37,547
Hey!
38
00:01:37,580 --> 00:01:40,804
There's my favorite friend.
39
00:01:41,159 --> 00:01:42,296
Whatcha up to?
40
00:01:42,321 --> 00:01:43,842
Uh, waiting for the frickin' mailman
41
00:01:43,867 --> 00:01:45,454
so I can get my new credit
card and buy all the kegs
42
00:01:45,478 --> 00:01:46,641
for the island party tomorrow.
43
00:01:46,665 --> 00:01:48,390
The whole town's counting
on me, and this...
44
00:01:48,415 --> 00:01:50,195
mailman's jerking me around.
45
00:01:50,220 --> 00:01:51,891
Interesting, so if
the credit card doesn't come,
46
00:01:51,915 --> 00:01:53,943
then you can't throw
the party tomorrow, and...
47
00:01:53,968 --> 00:01:55,768
I wouldn't have to
talk to you about anything.
48
00:01:56,406 --> 00:01:57,482
- What?
- Nothing.
49
00:01:57,507 --> 00:01:59,836
I just, I hope the credit card comes
50
00:01:59,870 --> 00:02:02,625
so you can throw that party.
51
00:02:02,650 --> 00:02:04,078
Okay, good. Me, too.
52
00:02:04,203 --> 00:02:05,232
JAYLA: Y'all,
53
00:02:05,257 --> 00:02:08,951
how long can someone
survive on only alcohol?
54
00:02:08,976 --> 00:02:11,320
My stepdad's been doing it for,
like, 12 years.
55
00:02:11,345 --> 00:02:14,367
Damn. I want to die faster than that.
56
00:02:15,697 --> 00:02:18,820
HAROLD (OVER PHONE):
Hey, Jay, baby. I miss you.
57
00:02:19,288 --> 00:02:22,835
I just wanted to tell you that I,
uh, left my wife and...
58
00:02:23,066 --> 00:02:24,773
I don't know, I just miss you so much.
59
00:02:24,798 --> 00:02:27,289
- I miss you, too.
- I really want to see you, baby.
60
00:02:27,314 --> 00:02:29,695
- Call me.
- (WHIMPERING)
61
00:02:30,242 --> 00:02:32,468
Y'all want to hear something hilarious?
62
00:02:32,493 --> 00:02:34,362
Definitely. I love jokes.
63
00:02:34,387 --> 00:02:36,834
If I had listened to this voice mail
64
00:02:36,859 --> 00:02:39,507
before I smashed Harold's windshield...
65
00:02:39,532 --> 00:02:41,819
- (ERICA LAUGHS)
- He wouldn't be ignoring my calls,
66
00:02:41,844 --> 00:02:43,867
and I'd still have a reason to live.
67
00:02:43,892 --> 00:02:45,507
(LAUGHS)
68
00:02:46,507 --> 00:02:47,784
I don't get it.
69
00:02:48,242 --> 00:02:50,123
HAROLD: Hey, Jay, baby. I miss you.
70
00:02:50,148 --> 00:02:52,523
KAITLIN: Jay, quit playing that crap.
71
00:02:52,855 --> 00:02:55,068
And you're gonna need to snap
out of the sad sack routine
72
00:02:55,092 --> 00:02:56,201
or you're gonna bring the party down.
73
00:02:56,225 --> 00:02:58,695
(COUGHING)
74
00:02:58,720 --> 00:03:00,257
Yo, dude, are you getting sick?
75
00:03:00,282 --> 00:03:02,651
Nah, it's just, like,
a allergy or something.
76
00:03:02,837 --> 00:03:05,421
(COUGHING)
77
00:03:06,742 --> 00:03:09,054
Oh, no. That is not right.
78
00:03:09,079 --> 00:03:11,359
- Dude...
- Yo, what's on your shirt?
79
00:03:11,648 --> 00:03:13,264
What? This fuzz stuff?
80
00:03:13,289 --> 00:03:15,632
I don't know, but
my mattress is covered in it.
81
00:03:15,657 --> 00:03:17,990
The mattress you got out that dumpster?
82
00:03:18,954 --> 00:03:20,475
(SHELBY GASPS)
83
00:03:20,500 --> 00:03:22,796
It's frickin' mold.
You're covered in mold.
84
00:03:22,821 --> 00:03:25,046
- Ah, God.
- Yo, you brought mold into our house?
85
00:03:25,071 --> 00:03:26,671
God, you're such a scrub.
86
00:03:27,123 --> 00:03:29,068
I really, I really
can't handle this right now.
87
00:03:29,093 --> 00:03:30,280
You need to go burn that mattress.
88
00:03:30,304 --> 00:03:33,014
What? No. I'm a pillow away
from having a whole bed.
89
00:03:33,039 --> 00:03:35,719
Shut up, shut up, shut up, everyone!
Shut up! My credit card's here!
90
00:03:53,070 --> 00:03:54,437
Yes!
91
00:03:55,734 --> 00:03:56,859
(LAUGHS)
92
00:03:56,884 --> 00:03:58,697
(WHOOPS, LAUGHS)
93
00:03:58,722 --> 00:04:00,390
Drink it in, bitches.
94
00:04:00,415 --> 00:04:02,984
My EZ Money credit card has arrived.
95
00:04:03,293 --> 00:04:04,867
We're going shopping!
96
00:04:04,892 --> 00:04:08,062
I got money, I got money,
I got money, I got money
97
00:04:08,390 --> 00:04:10,842
We own dough, hating that...
get your own dough
98
00:04:10,867 --> 00:04:13,451
Ballin' just like Rondo,
I did it, took my time though
99
00:04:13,476 --> 00:04:15,015
I came from nobody,
want to go, want to go?
100
00:04:15,039 --> 00:04:16,283
Now I got people
calling me pro, uh-huh
101
00:04:16,307 --> 00:04:17,804
Everybody on...
'cause I got a sick flow
102
00:04:17,828 --> 00:04:18,930
And they know I'm about to blow
103
00:04:18,954 --> 00:04:19,965
Like what, like boosh
104
00:04:19,990 --> 00:04:21,342
'Bout... like swoosh
105
00:04:21,367 --> 00:04:22,748
Don't worry about me, do you
106
00:04:22,773 --> 00:04:24,194
While your girlfriend do the crew
107
00:04:24,218 --> 00:04:26,718
That money got proof that
she picked it up, uh-huh
108
00:04:26,743 --> 00:04:28,350
And she dropped it low, low
109
00:04:28,375 --> 00:04:29,476
Do it for the dough
110
00:04:29,501 --> 00:04:30,883
While she blow it like some truff
111
00:04:30,907 --> 00:04:33,373
Money, money, money,
money, money, money, money
112
00:04:33,398 --> 00:04:34,835
I got money, money, money
113
00:04:34,860 --> 00:04:36,935
Money, money, money, money
114
00:04:37,453 --> 00:04:38,921
SHELBY: Uh...
115
00:04:39,296 --> 00:04:41,648
"Parly Goo"?
116
00:04:41,673 --> 00:04:43,085
That's a dope name for a boat.
117
00:04:43,110 --> 00:04:46,281
No, idiot, it obviously
says "Party God."
118
00:04:46,306 --> 00:04:47,984
- Uh, hmm...
- (SCOFFS)
119
00:04:48,009 --> 00:04:50,946
Man, tomorrow is gonna be wild.
120
00:04:51,290 --> 00:04:52,703
I hope someone dies.
121
00:04:52,728 --> 00:04:55,523
I mean, not one of us,
obviously, but someone.
122
00:04:55,548 --> 00:04:57,054
No one forgets a party
where someone dies.
123
00:04:57,078 --> 00:05:00,617
If someone's gonna die,
I would like it to be me.
124
00:05:01,351 --> 00:05:02,703
Um, dude,
125
00:05:02,728 --> 00:05:04,296
- about your party...
- Not now.
126
00:05:04,321 --> 00:05:06,857
Jay, get out of the car.
I need to say something.
127
00:05:08,167 --> 00:05:09,976
So, um, all right.
128
00:05:10,812 --> 00:05:12,484
I'm not trying to be
a pussy or anything,
129
00:05:12,509 --> 00:05:15,179
but I want y'all to know
this party means a lot to me.
130
00:05:15,204 --> 00:05:17,367
Ever since I was little, my dream
131
00:05:17,392 --> 00:05:19,068
was to be the coolest
girl in Clearwater,
132
00:05:19,093 --> 00:05:21,125
and we all know that I am.
133
00:05:21,150 --> 00:05:22,774
- Huh?
- But now...
134
00:05:23,811 --> 00:05:25,382
Everyone else is gonna know.
135
00:05:25,641 --> 00:05:26,772
So,
136
00:05:28,011 --> 00:05:31,007
thank you for helping me.
137
00:05:32,008 --> 00:05:33,977
I'll never forget it or whatever.
138
00:05:34,815 --> 00:05:35,815
Okay.
139
00:05:35,840 --> 00:05:37,147
See you inside.
140
00:05:37,172 --> 00:05:38,908
Party God in the house!
141
00:05:40,527 --> 00:05:41,671
(DOOR OPENS)
142
00:05:41,696 --> 00:05:43,798
- Was Kaitlin just nice to us?
- (DOOR CLOSES)
143
00:05:43,823 --> 00:05:45,444
Yeah, she was.
144
00:05:46,063 --> 00:05:47,749
I got out the car for that?
145
00:05:48,140 --> 00:05:49,700
You know I gotta come back
146
00:05:49,725 --> 00:05:51,882
You know I got to get the racks
147
00:05:53,327 --> 00:05:55,463
SHELBY: Wow, Kaitlin,
148
00:05:55,488 --> 00:05:57,116
- your hair's so cool.
- (LAUGHS)
149
00:05:57,141 --> 00:05:58,376
And Mango's hair.
150
00:05:58,401 --> 00:06:00,921
- So cool, too.
- Yeah, it's pretty baller.
151
00:06:00,946 --> 00:06:06,296
Yeah, um, I just wanted to
say I am so happy for you.
152
00:06:06,321 --> 00:06:09,460
You know, 'cause you're gonna
be a legend and everyone's gonna
153
00:06:09,485 --> 00:06:11,991
talk about your party
for years and years.
154
00:06:12,016 --> 00:06:14,538
- Yeah.
- Um, tiniest thing, I can't go,
155
00:06:14,563 --> 00:06:16,319
'cause my GED test is on the same day.
156
00:06:16,344 --> 00:06:18,921
(CHUCKLES): But, um, whatever,
you don't care, you get it.
157
00:06:19,415 --> 00:06:20,702
Oh, my God.
158
00:06:23,046 --> 00:06:24,444
(KAITLIN CLEARS THROAT)
159
00:06:24,871 --> 00:06:26,006
Okay.
160
00:06:27,125 --> 00:06:30,100
What? Uh... you're not mad?
161
00:06:30,535 --> 00:06:32,204
What? What? No.
162
00:06:32,386 --> 00:06:33,655
No, I'm not mad.
163
00:06:34,336 --> 00:06:35,592
It's totally fine.
164
00:06:37,049 --> 00:06:38,186
Good luck on your test.
165
00:06:38,663 --> 00:06:39,663
(LAUGHS SOFTLY)
166
00:06:39,688 --> 00:06:43,272
Wow, she handled that really well.
167
00:06:43,297 --> 00:06:46,235
- (SCREAMS)
- Oh, God.
168
00:06:46,260 --> 00:06:48,757
Still handling it better
than I thought she would.
169
00:06:48,782 --> 00:06:50,389
I will never forgive you for this.
170
00:06:50,414 --> 00:06:52,741
You're dead to me, you traitor!
171
00:06:53,923 --> 00:06:56,897
I mean, Erica's dying,
and she's still coming to the party.
172
00:06:56,922 --> 00:06:57,922
(COUGHS)
173
00:06:57,947 --> 00:07:00,374
Yeah, and I'm suicidal,
and I'm still coming.
174
00:07:00,399 --> 00:07:02,319
KAITLIN: See? Huffing hair dye.
175
00:07:02,344 --> 00:07:04,600
Wants to kill herself,
still finding a way to be there.
176
00:07:04,625 --> 00:07:06,319
- Baller.
- You know what?
177
00:07:06,344 --> 00:07:07,663
Forget it.
178
00:07:07,914 --> 00:07:09,186
Screw you!
179
00:07:09,441 --> 00:07:11,272
Oh, my God!
180
00:07:11,297 --> 00:07:12,499
(PAINED SHOUTING)
181
00:07:12,524 --> 00:07:14,389
How did you do that?
182
00:07:14,414 --> 00:07:16,155
Oh, my God.
183
00:07:16,180 --> 00:07:18,546
(EXHALES)
184
00:07:18,571 --> 00:07:20,288
You know what's crazy, Kaitlin?
185
00:07:20,313 --> 00:07:22,257
There's a small part of me that thought
186
00:07:22,282 --> 00:07:25,772
maybe I would tell you
I had to miss your party
187
00:07:25,797 --> 00:07:28,155
for my test and you wouldn't be mad.
188
00:07:28,180 --> 00:07:30,289
Wow, that's literally
the dumbest thing I've ever heard.
189
00:07:30,313 --> 00:07:31,313
Oh, you're right.
190
00:07:31,338 --> 00:07:33,647
It's so dumb of me to
think that my friend
191
00:07:33,672 --> 00:07:36,175
would be proud of me for
doing a thing I set out to do
192
00:07:36,200 --> 00:07:38,092
so I could start a career
and get out of Florida
193
00:07:38,117 --> 00:07:39,350
like Mandy did.
194
00:07:41,108 --> 00:07:42,108
(CAR DOOR CLOSES)
195
00:07:42,329 --> 00:07:44,210
SHELBY: Wait. Is that Mandy?
196
00:07:44,576 --> 00:07:45,584
What?
197
00:07:46,321 --> 00:07:49,264
Oh, my God. (SCOFFS) It is Mandy.
198
00:07:49,289 --> 00:07:50,835
Oh, great.
199
00:07:50,860 --> 00:07:52,422
- Oh, my God.
- I hate this stuck up bitch.
200
00:07:52,446 --> 00:07:53,804
Now I got to listen to
two a-holes talk about
201
00:07:53,828 --> 00:07:55,311
- how much Florida sucks.
- (SQUEALS)
202
00:07:55,336 --> 00:07:58,522
Oh, my God!
I can't believe you're in town.
203
00:07:58,547 --> 00:08:01,624
I was just talking about you.
What are you doing here?
204
00:08:01,649 --> 00:08:04,233
Dude, Ohio sucked dick.
205
00:08:04,258 --> 00:08:06,494
I missed Florida so much.
206
00:08:06,519 --> 00:08:08,608
I hope you bitches are up
for getting wild tonight.
207
00:08:08,633 --> 00:08:10,257
I'm talking like, jack off a cop
208
00:08:10,282 --> 00:08:12,452
to stay out of jail wild. Whoo!
209
00:08:12,711 --> 00:08:14,480
- No.
- Yes!
210
00:08:16,552 --> 00:08:20,569
I've been saving this for when
the Rays win the World Series,
211
00:08:20,594 --> 00:08:23,342
- but... this moment feels right.
- (GASPS)
212
00:08:23,367 --> 00:08:25,170
- (GIGGLES)
- Erica, weed.
213
00:08:25,493 --> 00:08:28,194
SHELBY: I cannot believe
214
00:08:28,219 --> 00:08:29,694
you hated Ohio.
215
00:08:29,719 --> 00:08:31,616
Y-You had your dream job, right?
216
00:08:31,641 --> 00:08:33,742
Corporate public relations
account assistant?
217
00:08:33,767 --> 00:08:36,663
I know, it sounds amazing on paper,
218
00:08:36,688 --> 00:08:39,132
but in real life, it's eight hours a day
219
00:08:39,157 --> 00:08:41,592
stuck with nerds in plaid
who talk about, like,
220
00:08:41,617 --> 00:08:44,108
different types of
coffee beans and shit.
221
00:08:44,133 --> 00:08:46,491
And have you ever heard of NPR?
222
00:08:46,516 --> 00:08:47,694
- No.
- It's like,
223
00:08:47,719 --> 00:08:50,168
radio about other
countries, all the hosts
224
00:08:50,193 --> 00:08:52,347
have dumbass names.
Everyone's obsessed with it.
225
00:08:52,372 --> 00:08:54,504
But, I mean, I called you.
226
00:08:54,529 --> 00:08:56,887
And you never called me
back, so I-I figured
227
00:08:56,912 --> 00:08:58,402
you were loving Ohio, and...
228
00:08:58,427 --> 00:09:01,131
Yeah, I'm so sorry about that.
229
00:09:01,156 --> 00:09:03,871
(HIP-HOP MUSIC PLAYING FAINTLY)
230
00:09:03,896 --> 00:09:05,168
(ERICA COUGHING)
231
00:09:05,193 --> 00:09:06,441
I think I just, like...
232
00:09:06,466 --> 00:09:08,715
wanted to start fresh,
with like, a clean slate,
233
00:09:08,740 --> 00:09:10,379
like, focus on my career.
234
00:09:11,167 --> 00:09:12,621
But then I realized,
235
00:09:12,646 --> 00:09:14,941
it's all so meaningless.
236
00:09:14,966 --> 00:09:17,590
- JAYLA: Mm-hmm.
- I mean, you work so hard for what?
237
00:09:17,615 --> 00:09:19,605
Just to be able to afford a shitty condo
238
00:09:19,630 --> 00:09:21,004
and a Hyundai Elantra?
239
00:09:21,029 --> 00:09:22,433
And then you keep on working
240
00:09:22,458 --> 00:09:25,004
and not having any fun until you die.
241
00:09:26,192 --> 00:09:28,361
Stop bringing the party down, Shelby.
242
00:09:28,510 --> 00:09:29,957
Sorry about her, she's just mad
243
00:09:29,982 --> 00:09:31,754
'cause she was wrong about everything.
244
00:09:32,325 --> 00:09:33,325
Okay.
245
00:09:33,350 --> 00:09:34,840
Raise 'em up, bitches.
246
00:09:34,865 --> 00:09:36,457
- Hell yeah.
- (LAUGHS)
247
00:09:36,482 --> 00:09:37,574
To Mandy.
248
00:09:37,599 --> 00:09:39,777
- ERICA: To Mandy.
- MANDY: To me.
249
00:09:40,560 --> 00:09:43,566
Goddamn, I missed you guys so much.
250
00:09:43,591 --> 00:09:46,551
I've just been, like, stalking
Jayla's Instagram for months.
251
00:09:46,576 --> 00:09:48,285
Just dying of jealousy at the fun
252
00:09:48,310 --> 00:09:50,566
- y'all were having.
- Oh, yeah.
253
00:09:51,051 --> 00:09:52,420
Before I ruined my life,
254
00:09:52,445 --> 00:09:55,371
I used to take pictures
looking fly in front of stuff.
255
00:09:55,794 --> 00:09:57,019
Don't worry about her.
256
00:09:57,326 --> 00:09:59,597
Uh, you were telling
us about how Ohio sucks
257
00:09:59,622 --> 00:10:01,872
- and Florida rules?
- No, but there's got to be something
258
00:10:01,896 --> 00:10:04,035
that you liked about Ohio, right?
259
00:10:04,060 --> 00:10:05,238
I mean...
260
00:10:05,263 --> 00:10:07,051
they have these things called wine bars.
261
00:10:07,076 --> 00:10:10,332
It's basically a bar,
but there's more wine than beer.
262
00:10:10,357 --> 00:10:11,512
Dumb.
263
00:10:11,537 --> 00:10:13,873
And... I had health insurance.
264
00:10:13,898 --> 00:10:15,269
(COUGHS) Oh, tight.
265
00:10:15,294 --> 00:10:16,677
You think you can get me some medicine?
266
00:10:16,701 --> 00:10:18,660
- I got mold.
- KAITLIN: Erica, knock it off.
267
00:10:18,685 --> 00:10:20,176
And you know, go burn that mattress.
268
00:10:20,201 --> 00:10:21,481
Don't think I forgot about that.
269
00:10:22,197 --> 00:10:23,676
(COUGHING)
270
00:10:23,701 --> 00:10:25,675
- Dude, are you okay?
- No.
271
00:10:25,700 --> 00:10:28,340
I got mold from my
mattress and no one cares
272
00:10:28,365 --> 00:10:30,996
- and everyone's yelling at me.
- KAITLIN: Erica! Go now.
273
00:10:31,758 --> 00:10:33,816
Just ignore her; she's fine.
274
00:10:34,512 --> 00:10:36,097
All right. (LAUGHS)
275
00:10:36,122 --> 00:10:39,324
What do you say we, uh,
keg things up a notch?
276
00:10:39,349 --> 00:10:41,218
- Right? (LAUGHS)
- Hell yeah.
277
00:10:41,762 --> 00:10:44,566
Oh, shit, but Shelby.
278
00:10:44,591 --> 00:10:46,126
You can't hang out, right?
279
00:10:46,151 --> 00:10:48,402
'Cause you got to study
for your GED test?
280
00:10:48,427 --> 00:10:51,512
So you can get a career
and-and get out of Florida.
281
00:10:52,237 --> 00:10:53,355
Uh-huh.
282
00:10:53,645 --> 00:10:56,410
Right, I totally forgot
that you were doing that.
283
00:10:56,435 --> 00:10:58,090
Ugh, and I just said
all this stuff about
284
00:10:58,115 --> 00:10:59,552
how awful it is out there.
285
00:10:59,577 --> 00:11:02,113
(GROANS) You must've
wasted so much time.
286
00:11:02,138 --> 00:11:03,676
I feel horrible. (GIGGLES)
287
00:11:03,701 --> 00:11:05,504
KAITLIN: Yeah, it sucks for her.
288
00:11:06,108 --> 00:11:07,472
- Let's go.
- Yeah.
289
00:11:10,719 --> 00:11:14,808
(ERICA COUGHING)
290
00:11:14,833 --> 00:11:16,551
Yeah!
291
00:11:16,576 --> 00:11:18,160
Fast life, fast life, fast life...
292
00:11:18,185 --> 00:11:21,688
(SCREAMING, LAUGHTER)
293
00:11:21,713 --> 00:11:23,482
(WHOOPING, LAUGHTER OUTSIDE)
294
00:11:23,507 --> 00:11:25,910
(INDISTINCT SHOUTING)
295
00:11:25,935 --> 00:11:26,996
Yeah!
296
00:11:27,021 --> 00:11:29,157
I live on the edge,
on the deep end...
297
00:11:29,182 --> 00:11:30,379
(CLEARS THROAT)
298
00:11:31,426 --> 00:11:32,715
Okay.
299
00:11:33,236 --> 00:11:34,254
"Chapter one.
300
00:11:34,279 --> 00:11:37,262
As you prepare to take the GED test..."
301
00:11:37,287 --> 00:11:38,597
(MUFFLED LAUGHTER, CHATTER)
302
00:11:38,622 --> 00:11:40,105
(EXHALES)
303
00:11:40,130 --> 00:11:42,129
- There you go.
- (OVERLAPPING CHATTER)
304
00:11:42,154 --> 00:11:45,222
- Yes.
- Wha... Uh-oh, uh-oh. Mom's here.
305
00:11:45,247 --> 00:11:46,847
- (LAUGHS) What's wrong, Mom?
- Oh...
306
00:11:46,872 --> 00:11:48,707
Is our happiness too loud for you?
307
00:11:48,732 --> 00:11:50,183
(ERICA AND KAITLIN LAUGH)
308
00:11:50,208 --> 00:11:53,332
No, I was gonna have a beer
and then get back to studying.
309
00:11:53,357 --> 00:11:55,097
MANDY: Yeah, you could have a beer.
310
00:11:55,122 --> 00:11:56,449
Or...
311
00:11:56,474 --> 00:11:58,344
you could do a keg stand.
312
00:11:58,369 --> 00:12:01,137
- Ooh...
- KAITLIN: Oh, shit.
313
00:12:02,351 --> 00:12:04,965
- Fuck it.
- ALL: Yeah!
314
00:12:04,990 --> 00:12:07,210
Get up here! Get up! Get up!
315
00:12:07,235 --> 00:12:08,449
We gettin' to the money...
316
00:12:08,474 --> 00:12:10,683
- Yeah!
- (WHOOPING)
317
00:12:10,708 --> 00:12:13,316
I still on everybody,
up and down I hit the switches
318
00:12:13,341 --> 00:12:15,910
24/7, especially on
the weekends, weekends
319
00:12:15,935 --> 00:12:18,304
Place the gang,
feelin' exotic and real meekish, yep
320
00:12:18,318 --> 00:12:20,426
Cash so good,
offers don't need no defense
321
00:12:20,451 --> 00:12:22,824
Cash, knick-knack paddywhack,
give a dog a bone
322
00:12:22,849 --> 00:12:25,137
We got space, hit the droll,
you not goin' home
323
00:12:25,162 --> 00:12:27,340
You know I'm squad,
so I put my squad on
324
00:12:27,365 --> 00:12:29,013
When you hear me,
your speakers better go
325
00:12:29,037 --> 00:12:31,019
Halla dom, halla dom, club hoppin'
326
00:12:31,044 --> 00:12:32,519
Poppin' here in they old joggy
327
00:12:32,544 --> 00:12:35,071
Won't stop it from the shine
'cause we all got it
328
00:12:35,096 --> 00:12:37,535
Large pockets, overseas,
and we all mall shoppin'
329
00:12:37,560 --> 00:12:40,004
Don't shot it, get this money
'cause we real shotters...
330
00:12:40,029 --> 00:12:43,293
ALL: Burn it, burn it, burn it!
331
00:12:44,557 --> 00:12:46,808
Screw that dumb test
332
00:12:46,833 --> 00:12:49,019
and screw those lame-ass classes!
333
00:12:49,044 --> 00:12:50,668
I want to party with y'all...
334
00:12:50,693 --> 00:12:52,562
- forever!
- (ALL SCREAMING)
335
00:12:52,587 --> 00:12:56,598
(LAUGHTER, WHOOPING)
336
00:12:56,623 --> 00:12:57,910
- Wait, wait, wait.
- Oh-ho.
337
00:12:57,935 --> 00:12:59,855
Y'all. Y'all.
338
00:13:00,264 --> 00:13:02,512
Do you realize that-that we have a boat
339
00:13:02,537 --> 00:13:05,176
full of kegs just,
just sitting right over there?
340
00:13:05,625 --> 00:13:08,722
Let's take them to the island right now
341
00:13:08,747 --> 00:13:11,051
and party until everyone
gets there tomorrow.
342
00:13:11,076 --> 00:13:13,629
(CHEERING, WHOOPING)
343
00:13:13,654 --> 00:13:15,574
- (LAUGHING)
- Do it! Yeah!
344
00:13:15,599 --> 00:13:17,512
- That's right.
- Come on!
345
00:13:17,537 --> 00:13:19,105
- Whoo! Shotgun!
- Yeah.
346
00:13:19,130 --> 00:13:20,980
Yes! (CACKLES)
347
00:13:21,005 --> 00:13:23,801
(LAUGHING)
348
00:13:25,532 --> 00:13:27,368
Let's go, come on!
349
00:13:27,393 --> 00:13:28,879
- (LAUGHS)
- (WHOOPING)
350
00:13:28,904 --> 00:13:30,996
- Let's go.
- Um...
351
00:13:31,021 --> 00:13:32,504
- Liam!
- (WHOOPS)
352
00:13:32,529 --> 00:13:34,215
(BLOWS)
353
00:13:34,240 --> 00:13:35,558
(BEEPING)
354
00:13:35,583 --> 00:13:37,363
- Awesome. Thanks, bud.
- (CHEERING)
355
00:13:37,388 --> 00:13:39,082
- Here's some gum.
- KAITLIN: Liam.
356
00:13:39,304 --> 00:13:41,439
I need you to take care of Mango.
357
00:13:41,464 --> 00:13:42,933
He'll eat whatever you eat.
358
00:13:42,958 --> 00:13:44,459
Keep it real, bud.
359
00:13:45,355 --> 00:13:46,722
SHELBY: All right.
360
00:13:47,317 --> 00:13:49,987
(ALL WHOOPING)
361
00:13:50,012 --> 00:13:51,168
Let's go!
362
00:13:51,193 --> 00:13:54,218
(SHOUTING, WHOOPING)
363
00:13:54,243 --> 00:13:56,651
Surprise hits, on some rhymes...
364
00:13:56,676 --> 00:14:00,332
Guys, I'm sorry I've sucked for so long.
365
00:14:00,357 --> 00:14:02,965
No, no, no, no, it's okay. I have.
366
00:14:02,990 --> 00:14:03,996
But don't worry.
367
00:14:04,021 --> 00:14:06,957
Cool Party Shelby is back forever.
368
00:14:06,982 --> 00:14:08,683
(ALL LAUGH)
369
00:14:08,708 --> 00:14:11,004
- Hey, Cool Party Shelby.
- Yeah?
370
00:14:11,029 --> 00:14:14,043
- You fully just missed the boat ramp!
- What?
371
00:14:14,068 --> 00:14:16,191
- (ALL LAUGHING)
- Dumbass!
372
00:14:16,216 --> 00:14:18,582
You missed the light.
373
00:14:19,792 --> 00:14:22,957
- Thank you so much, Mandy.
- All right.
374
00:14:22,982 --> 00:14:24,458
If it weren't for you,
I would be studying
375
00:14:24,482 --> 00:14:25,676
for some pointless test
376
00:14:25,701 --> 00:14:28,272
instead of having the best
frickin' night of my life...
377
00:14:28,297 --> 00:14:29,996
Whoo!
378
00:14:30,021 --> 00:14:32,574
- (QUIETLY): Oh, my...
- JAYLA: Damn.
379
00:14:33,282 --> 00:14:34,926
I'm still alive.
380
00:14:34,951 --> 00:14:35,972
Is everyone okay?
381
00:14:35,997 --> 00:14:38,801
My head hurts, but I think I'm okay.
382
00:14:38,826 --> 00:14:40,269
Kaitlin, can you help me get out?
383
00:14:40,294 --> 00:14:41,428
KAITLIN: The boat!
384
00:14:45,858 --> 00:14:48,238
(ALL GRUNTING)
385
00:14:48,920 --> 00:14:50,306
The boat's fine.
386
00:14:50,331 --> 00:14:52,035
- (GROANING)
- It's totally fine.
387
00:14:54,762 --> 00:14:57,824
Okay. We're good.
388
00:14:58,663 --> 00:14:59,816
We're good, guys. I mean,
389
00:14:59,841 --> 00:15:03,488
the kegs are a little
banged up, but... yeah.
390
00:15:03,775 --> 00:15:05,343
It's all gonna be okay.
391
00:15:05,368 --> 00:15:07,308
- Wow.
- (ALL CHUCKLING)
392
00:15:07,333 --> 00:15:09,230
SHELBY: What a close...
393
00:15:12,844 --> 00:15:14,090
... call.
394
00:15:17,460 --> 00:15:21,374
(GRUNTING)
395
00:15:21,399 --> 00:15:25,051
Holy crap. I just wrecked our only car.
396
00:15:25,076 --> 00:15:26,138
Yeah, well, we have mine, remember?
397
00:15:26,162 --> 00:15:27,769
I have a brand-new Hyundai Elantra.
398
00:15:27,794 --> 00:15:29,785
I could fuck with an Elantra.
399
00:15:29,810 --> 00:15:30,810
Wow.
400
00:15:31,139 --> 00:15:32,707
Okay, so nothing bad happened.
401
00:15:32,732 --> 00:15:36,012
- Well, I am hurt pretty bad.
- KAITLIN: Nothing bad happened?
402
00:15:36,037 --> 00:15:37,504
Really, Shelby?
403
00:15:37,529 --> 00:15:40,355
We're seven hours away
from the party of the year,
404
00:15:40,380 --> 00:15:42,629
and our ride is under a freakin' pole.
405
00:15:42,654 --> 00:15:45,590
Dude, you need to chill out.
Parties are supposed to be fun.
406
00:15:45,615 --> 00:15:47,051
Lighten up, we'll figure it out.
407
00:15:47,076 --> 00:15:49,012
Oh, yeah, sure, cool.
Easy for you to say.
408
00:15:49,037 --> 00:15:51,473
Your reputation isn't
riding on this party.
409
00:15:53,702 --> 00:15:55,074
God!
410
00:15:55,099 --> 00:15:57,508
How are we gonna get nine kegs
to an island without a boat?
411
00:15:59,181 --> 00:16:01,165
Y'all, I got an idea.
412
00:16:01,851 --> 00:16:04,798
What if the kegs were the boat?
413
00:16:05,025 --> 00:16:07,548
Erica, you just flew into a windshield,
414
00:16:07,573 --> 00:16:08,611
you're not making any sense.
415
00:16:08,635 --> 00:16:10,962
No, I just mean kegs float, right?
416
00:16:10,987 --> 00:16:14,063
What if we tie them all
together and make a keg raft?
417
00:16:14,088 --> 00:16:16,329
We can paddle to the island on the kegs.
418
00:16:16,354 --> 00:16:17,805
The kegs are the boat.
419
00:16:19,349 --> 00:16:20,907
420
00:16:20,932 --> 00:16:24,673
The kegs... are the boat.
421
00:16:25,531 --> 00:16:27,376
The kegs are the boat.
422
00:16:27,401 --> 00:16:29,477
ERICA and KAITLIN:
The kegs are the boat!
423
00:16:29,502 --> 00:16:30,837
- Yes!
- (LAUGHING)
424
00:16:30,862 --> 00:16:33,321
This will go down in history
as the most badass way
425
00:16:33,346 --> 00:16:35,282
anyone's ever gotten to an island.
426
00:16:35,307 --> 00:16:37,548
(ALL SCREAMING)
427
00:16:37,573 --> 00:16:39,074
Wait, what's happening?
428
00:16:40,564 --> 00:16:42,977
No!
429
00:16:52,933 --> 00:16:53,933
Damn.
430
00:16:54,118 --> 00:16:56,258
How are we gonna explain this one?
431
00:16:59,853 --> 00:17:01,421
Kegs fucking float?
432
00:17:01,446 --> 00:17:03,782
Kegs fucking float?!
433
00:17:03,807 --> 00:17:05,344
Fuck you, Erica!
434
00:17:05,369 --> 00:17:07,024
When I get up on that fucking dock,
435
00:17:07,049 --> 00:17:08,602
I'm gonna choke you the fuck out,
436
00:17:08,627 --> 00:17:11,048
you brain-dead fucking moron!
437
00:17:11,073 --> 00:17:13,571
Yo, I'm fully sorry.
I was thinking of empty kegs.
438
00:17:13,596 --> 00:17:15,063
Yeah? You should've said empty,
439
00:17:15,088 --> 00:17:16,338
- you stupid idiot!
- Whoa, whoa, whoa...
440
00:17:16,362 --> 00:17:18,376
- What the fuck is wrong with you?
- Stop.
441
00:17:18,401 --> 00:17:21,313
Hey, dummies. How much time
we got till this party starts?
442
00:17:21,338 --> 00:17:24,821
Oh, what party? The one at
the bottom of the fucking Gulf?
443
00:17:24,846 --> 00:17:27,133
God, I'm gonna be the town joke now!
444
00:17:27,158 --> 00:17:29,141
Jesus Christ, calm down!
445
00:17:29,525 --> 00:17:31,126
Can someone tell me when y'all forgot
446
00:17:31,151 --> 00:17:32,430
what badasses you are?
447
00:17:32,455 --> 00:17:33,755
'Cause the girls I used to know
448
00:17:33,780 --> 00:17:36,032
could put together an
island party in 15 minutes.
449
00:17:36,230 --> 00:17:37,516
Do you remember when we were 13,
450
00:17:37,541 --> 00:17:39,517
and we wanted to go to Prana
with those hot firemen,
451
00:17:39,541 --> 00:17:41,079
but we didn't have fake I.D.s?
452
00:17:41,104 --> 00:17:42,649
Did we give up? No.
453
00:17:42,674 --> 00:17:44,189
Shelby got the idea to make fake I.D.s
454
00:17:44,213 --> 00:17:45,313
out of our yearbook photos.
455
00:17:45,338 --> 00:17:47,376
And remember we made
the jenkiest fake I.D.s,
456
00:17:47,401 --> 00:17:49,837
and the doorman at Prana
told us to kick rocks?
457
00:17:49,862 --> 00:17:51,055
And did we kick rocks?
458
00:17:51,080 --> 00:17:54,024
No, Jayla told him we'd show
him our tits if he let us in.
459
00:17:54,049 --> 00:17:56,071
- (LAUGHING)
- And when he told us
460
00:17:56,096 --> 00:17:57,965
he didn't want to see our "little buds,"
461
00:17:57,990 --> 00:17:59,792
did we cry and go home?
462
00:17:59,817 --> 00:18:01,805
Nope. Erica showed him her pussy.
463
00:18:01,830 --> 00:18:02,915
- Ah.
- Oh, yeah.
464
00:18:02,940 --> 00:18:05,493
And when he threatened to call the cops,
465
00:18:05,518 --> 00:18:08,376
did we run away scared
like little babies?
466
00:18:10,836 --> 00:18:12,344
'Cause I kneed that turd in the balls,
467
00:18:12,368 --> 00:18:13,775
'Cause I kneed that turd in the balls,
468
00:18:13,799 --> 00:18:15,768
- and we bull-rushed the door.
- Ah...
469
00:18:15,793 --> 00:18:17,360
(CHUCKLING)
470
00:18:17,385 --> 00:18:19,251
Now I'm gonna ask again:
471
00:18:19,276 --> 00:18:21,612
how much time we got
till this party starts?
472
00:18:21,637 --> 00:18:24,024
- Five hours.
- Okay!
473
00:18:24,049 --> 00:18:25,548
So what are we sitting around for?
474
00:18:25,573 --> 00:18:26,954
Let's go get some more kegs!
475
00:18:26,979 --> 00:18:28,281
Who do we know that's awake this early,
476
00:18:28,305 --> 00:18:30,105
that could give us
a ride to the ghetto store?
477
00:18:34,876 --> 00:18:35,979
Mom?
478
00:18:36,261 --> 00:18:37,469
What are you doing?
479
00:18:37,758 --> 00:18:39,454
(DOOR HANDLE RATTLING)
480
00:18:41,154 --> 00:18:44,462
Shelby, I'm sure glad you called
me at the ass crack of dawn
481
00:18:44,487 --> 00:18:47,368
to pick y'all up,
and I'm happy to do you this favor.
482
00:18:47,393 --> 00:18:49,416
(SIGHS) Son of a bitch,
can we just skip the bullshit,
483
00:18:49,440 --> 00:18:50,798
and you tell me what you want?
484
00:18:50,823 --> 00:18:54,321
Oh, you been drinking.
Well, good for you.
485
00:18:54,346 --> 00:18:56,969
Look here. Now, I recently
just came across a drawer full
486
00:18:56,994 --> 00:18:59,633
of your dead grandma's
unfilled prescriptions,
487
00:18:59,658 --> 00:19:02,149
and many of them will help my back.
488
00:19:02,174 --> 00:19:04,337
So I'm gonna need you to
come to the pharmacy with me
489
00:19:04,362 --> 00:19:06,407
to pretend to be your dead grandma.
490
00:19:06,432 --> 00:19:08,532
Ooh, 'cause God bless the Lord above,
491
00:19:08,557 --> 00:19:10,313
you two got the same name.
492
00:19:10,338 --> 00:19:11,813
You want me to do prescription fraud
493
00:19:11,838 --> 00:19:14,742
in exchange for a three-mile ride, Mom?
494
00:19:14,767 --> 00:19:16,602
You're so selfish.
495
00:19:16,627 --> 00:19:18,766
Was it selfish when I gave birth to you
496
00:19:18,791 --> 00:19:21,152
and slipped all my damn discs, huh?
497
00:19:21,177 --> 00:19:22,626
Get your ass in the van.
498
00:19:22,651 --> 00:19:24,805
No! Screw this. We'd rather walk.
499
00:19:24,830 --> 00:19:26,087
- Uh, would we?
- Not me.
500
00:19:26,112 --> 00:19:27,118
I ain't say that.
501
00:19:27,143 --> 00:19:31,400
Well, have fun. 'Cause I hear
it's gonna be one hot-as-shit day.
502
00:19:31,425 --> 00:19:35,643
(CACKLING)
503
00:19:35,668 --> 00:19:36,903
(SCOFFS)
504
00:19:38,026 --> 00:19:40,563
- I'll do it.
- (TIRES SCREECHING)
505
00:19:40,588 --> 00:19:41,754
What the...?
506
00:19:42,258 --> 00:19:43,724
How'd you get in here?
507
00:19:43,749 --> 00:19:46,025
Trunk. I'll do the prescription thing.
508
00:19:46,050 --> 00:19:48,838
Now, how the hell you think
you're gonna trick a pharmacist
509
00:19:48,863 --> 00:19:50,268
into thinking that you're Shelby?
510
00:19:50,293 --> 00:19:52,362
- I just swiped this from her.
- (GASPS)
511
00:19:52,569 --> 00:19:54,805
Oh, you got all the answers, huh?
512
00:19:54,830 --> 00:19:57,181
I'm gonna need something
in return, though.
513
00:19:57,206 --> 00:19:59,346
See, I need some meds real bad.
514
00:19:59,371 --> 00:20:02,341
I flew into a windshield
and I got mold poisoned.
515
00:20:02,366 --> 00:20:05,589
None of my friends care,
but I think I might be real sick.
516
00:20:06,232 --> 00:20:09,052
Huh. Got a little hustler
in you, don't you?
517
00:20:09,523 --> 00:20:12,591
I like that. You got a deal.
518
00:20:12,616 --> 00:20:14,505
Yes.
519
00:20:15,500 --> 00:20:18,310
Oh. You're shivering.
520
00:20:18,335 --> 00:20:20,958
Um, there's a sweater or
something by your feet.
521
00:20:24,364 --> 00:20:27,669
You sure? I might get mold on it.
522
00:20:27,694 --> 00:20:29,794
Oh, that's okay. Um.
523
00:20:29,819 --> 00:20:31,294
I don't want you to die in my van.
524
00:20:31,319 --> 00:20:33,188
And then I got to clean up that mess.
525
00:20:35,905 --> 00:20:38,458
That's the nicest thing
anyone's ever said to me.
526
00:20:40,649 --> 00:20:43,894
527
00:20:43,919 --> 00:20:46,310
(SNIFFS) Man,
this hair dye ain't doing nothing.
528
00:20:49,967 --> 00:20:52,153
God!
529
00:20:53,082 --> 00:20:54,717
Are we really doing this?
530
00:20:54,742 --> 00:20:57,419
Walking three miles,
we don't even have a boat?
531
00:20:57,697 --> 00:20:59,560
We're never gonna pull this off.
532
00:20:59,585 --> 00:21:02,130
We better,
I'm skipping my GED test for it.
533
00:21:02,155 --> 00:21:04,146
Y'all, trust me, we can do this.
534
00:21:04,171 --> 00:21:05,279
When the five of us are together,
535
00:21:05,303 --> 00:21:06,864
we're, like, unstoppable.
536
00:21:10,528 --> 00:21:13,028
Now we're back in the night
537
00:21:13,053 --> 00:21:14,560
Yeah-yeah, yeah-yeah, oh
538
00:21:14,585 --> 00:21:16,802
_
539
00:21:16,827 --> 00:21:20,227
Synced & corrected by QueenMaddie
www.addic7ed.com
540
00:21:20,277 --> 00:21:24,827
Repair and Synchronization by
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