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Translation: Alex Suri GR (12/12/2025) ..: Movies by Alex Suri GR :..

For the new world.

Long live Zaki and happy birthday,

to grow up with white hair.

Spreading the light of knowledge everywhere

and let all say: behold a wise man!

- I love you! - I love you too.

17 years old, I don't believe it. How time flies!

- I know... - Sorry,

where are you going your day alone

You are angry where didn't we come earlier?

No. I wish you were here but...

Ah, I understand. You want to do something adult.

- Hello, buddy! - Hi, Dad.

I wish you a happy birthday...

- I still can't whistle. - Thank you very much.

- Did Joe's family come? - Yes, I think so.

Okay, then... We are preparing everything for tomorrow.

It's going to be a big day for the celebrant. You.

- Yes, that sounds good. - The Airbnb here has a sauna.

We will melt her. If you understand what I mean.

- So, my love? - Yes!

- Nice. Is it gluten free? - What? Yes. Yes, yes.

You have to be careful your belly, buddy.

- Do you remember in Honolulu? - Yes, of course.

It was like an explosion volcano on your butt!

Yes, I know, I know.

- Oops! - What was that?

- Nothing. Eh... Everything is fine. - What's going on there?

- I was cleaning my nose and... - Okay, calm down.

- Do you watch porn? - No, no. I'm just sitting here...

- What's going on? - Nothing, manly things.

A video was thrown of YouTube on my mobile...

and it was very strange what happened...

Okay, my mistake. Let me guess: you see "highlander".

Our tradition, friend. Yes, "Highlander"!

This tradition I'm not breaking her at all.

Exactly, that's why we're letting you go.

But if you need anything, anything, call. Ok;

Yes, Dad, everything good here, i promise.

- Happy Birthday! - Happy Birthday!

- See you tomorrow! - You... I love you.

- He was satisfying himself. - My God!

Why every conversation with parents for sex and alcohol

does she have to be so uncomfortable?

We just can't let's talk casually?

Something like this: "Hello, mom and dad.

I'm going to a friend's I might even get drunk.

Or to sleep with the hottest girl in school."

"Really, honey? Great! I am so proud of you.

And I know you're old enough for alcohol and sex."

Adolescence is not for dancing hormones,

wild desires and bullshit?

There is no control. The nature gave it to us, like superpowers,

and our parents want it to suppress them

and pretend that everything they are normal. Is this normal?

Would you say no to Spider-Man? Huh?

And yes, you can tell that it is childish and silly,

but that's life. We are not all children

pretending to be adults?

Okay, yes, I saw some spicy photos and videos.

You don't?

Delete history! Click.

They are swollen.

But yes, there is the tradition of birthdays, where I sit

and I watch my favorite movie: the "Highlander".

Why? Why "Highlander" it's the best movie!

It has Christopher Lambert, Sean Connery and amazing Queen songs.

All together make up a wonderful accord of the glorious '80s.

Simply unbeatable! I like it and the series with Adrian Paul,

of course. But "in the end

only one remains."

- Oh, hi, Joe. - Jacques, cigarettes!

This, folks, is Joe Goldsmith. My best friend since I was eight.

And... who... who is he

- Ah, this is Yako. - Complete. Hello, friend.

Hey, what's he saying, bro?

Uh... nothing.

Yes, I understand. I'm a cool guy.

Well, uh... come on in, probably.

Tell me, where did you catch him?

- He was lost in the forest. - Lost, really?

Yes.

Yes, I am very bad orientation.

- Help! Aid! - Are you going to cry now?

Come on, let's go.

And... and, uh... do you go to school here or...?

Yes. I want to be a pilot.

- Oh, pilot. That's nice. - Very cool.

I know that. The other option is a survival instructor.

Huh, Yako? You take... you take medicine

about your orientation problem?

- Funny you ask... - What?! Where did you get these, huh?

I have a lot of space on pockets of my jacket.

We're going to party tonight as if there is no tomorrow.

Well, now I have friends.

Guys, wait! I forgot my pills.

- What? - Joe, beer has gluten,

- I'm getting a headache! You know it! - Oh, yes.

Guys, here it is!

Yes! DJ, set it on fire!

Damn, yes!

Oh, Joe's mom is a goddess.

- What the hell are you looking at? - What?

Don't you see it? I have a bigger tool.

I will fix you if you get in my way

I will level you. You will never be the same again.

What are you talking about?

You heard me, bitch. What are you talking about?

It's my birthday. What are you talking about?

You heard me, bitch. What are you talking about?

I want vanilla with truffle, bitch.

Tell them, Zac. These idiots.

This time they will shoot you, morons.

- All the haters and... - Fuck off!

Sorry, Mrs. P.! She is very good.

Let's turn it down a little.

Last shot! Don't be such a freak!

No, no. We have drinks and beers in the fridge.

Yes, yes. So have a drink and sit down.

Otherwise we'll kick you your fucking ass.

Boom! Yes.

You heard us. We are older than you.

What are these anachronists and sexist lyrics?

That sounds so aggressive, man.

We have drinks and beers in the fridge.

So have a drink and sit down.

Otherwise we'll kick you your fucking ass!

Bitches!

What the hell... Where is everyone?

I think... I think that they all went from here.

We just came from here, Yako.

Drink, drink, drink!

Unbelievable! Perfect

Yes!

Hello! what are you doing This is Wild Pete.

I hope you're having a good time a perfect day

here at the Vuokatti ski resort.

Vuokatin Aateli: Enjoyment, life and love.

Beaten, not stirred.

Let's go party!

WITH LUXURIOUS BREAKFAST LUXURY ROOMS

Today is a special day, even more special than yesterday.

Soon the monsters will rule,

because today is the annual Monster Fest! Yes!

And to top it all off, a great guest of honor,

a Hollywood superstar! Yes!

WHO IS THIS MAN? And most importantly:

The possibility exists

to consume alcoholic beverages!

Don't miss this opportunity!

- Damn it! - This was an awesome presentation.

- I totally agree! - I got burned.

Me too.

Really now? Do you want to go there?

How about "Kalsarikanit"?

We could go in the forest with beers.

KALSARIKÄNNIT, NOUN: "DRINKING IN YOUR UNDERWEAR".

A FORM OF DRINK CULTURE, WHERE SOMEONE DRINKS AT HOME

WITH LIGHT CLOTHES, WITH NO INTENT TO GO OUT.

I happen to have with me toilet paper.

If anyone needs it.

That is, you.

This is a book.

However, it seems to be possible coronavirus themed party.

And this looks like party with sexy nuns.

And, uh... Oops, an '80s party!

This looks awesome! Let's go there... Guys? Are you listening?

Party with sexy nuns. Dot.

Who is the superstar? of Hollywood on the jury?

- Maybe Christopher Lambert. - Yes, in my dreams.

We are very honored to have you the famous judge

in this year's model competition of Monster Fest, Mr. Lambert.

Thanks.

Yes...

It looks great.

Hi;

Is anyone here?

Gender? Very funny.

Hello! what are you doing This is Wild Pete talking to you,

in the Vuokatti ski resort!

Hi!

- Man, we're in! Hello... - You're welcome bro.

This is awesome!

- What the hell? - Man, sorry about that.

- Shit... Shit. - What's wrong with you, nerd?

Nothing. I just... I spilled your beer, that's the problem sir...

Then you better take it from me a new one.

- Smash him, Biff! - Please, no.

Wait. Biff?

- What? - Nothing. Your name is simply Biff.

- I love movies. - What are you talking about, huh?

For Biff, you know...

- Biff? - I'm not talking nerdy.

Come on, relax.

- What are you? Houdini? - Here, take it. Relax.

Do yourself a favor and disappear.

- I knew he knows! - What are you saying?

No, nothing, man. Listen, we're fine. Correctly;

Hey, let's party, guys!

Wendy, I can fly!

Hello! what are you doing

ladies and gentlemen,

are you ready You are ready to have fun?

Yes!

Today will be a special day.

A day to remember for the rest of your life.

Which will be great. I'm sure.

Wait, before we continue. Half. The time has come.

It is the most important moment of the day.

It's time to consume an alcoholic drink.

Instructions: First you smell it and you look at it.

Then you put it in your mouth and you taste it.

You feel the anticipation for the wonderful things

that are going to happen.

It will crawl from your stomach in your brain and it will whisper to you.

Will keep you posted when is it time for the next round!

Yes!

monsterfest, welcome to the House of Eli!

Man, so many ski bunnies!

Panettaa.

Yes! What?

Panetta, okay? Panettaa.

PANETTAA, VERB: MEANS "TO CALL."

Panettaa... I don't know what it means, but i like it.

Ok.

- Hello, Uncle John. What news? - Hello, happy birthday, Zakako!

- Thank you. - How are you? How is Finland?

Good, yes. Huh, Finland? She is gorgeous.

I'm in my room, I rest and wait

- have my parents come. - What noise is that? Are you partying?

What? No! No, no party at all. I'm only 17.

- "Only 17"? - Yes.

At your age, I was masturbated and I was jumping like a rabbit.

What? This... this is weird. Someone's in!

- Uncle John, I have to hang up. - Why? To spend some time alone?

There's someone inside! Nothing like that.

Listen, I understand you. In age I did it to you all the time.

Dot! Now I can't get it out this image from my mind.

- Thank you very much, perfect. - What do you say, Zach?

- It's very noisy. - Yes, yes... I think...

...that the postman came. I have to hang up.

Thanks for taking. Tell aunt Elizabeth, I love her too, okay?

- Make him understand, Zach! - Okay.

- You are young once. - Yeah, right. You are right...

ok i love you hello

Oh my god. Hey! There's someone inside!

Here, uh...

"Chicane".

are you ok WHERE ARE YOU? MAN, ARE YOU LISTENING?

"I'm in the chemical toilet. where are you I'll be right back."

Hey! Aid!

STAY THERE! DO NOT GO OUT!

"What;"

THEY ARE LIKE "GREMLINS"! THESE THINGS KILL PEOPLE!

HIDING WITH YAKO DOWN BY THE DJ.

"What? What are you talking about?"

M.E.I.N.E.

ok...

Where... where did everyone go?

Joe?

Shit! Run! Run!

Run!

Run, run!

Run, run!

What... What the hell?!

Run, Yako, run!

Perkle!

Wait, the snowmobile!

Come on up! We fucked her badly.

My God!

- What's going on here? - It's like the Muppets went crazy.

- I love the Muppets! - Me too.

Guys, run away! How does he go about it?

Yes! Yes! Come! Quick, quick!

- Guys, where should I go? - Yako?

There is a large warehouse near here

Okay, here we go!

- What are you doing there? - Just checking something.

He wants to see who he is the superstar.

- Drive, drive, drive! - Maybe it's Kevin Costner!

Damn, you should have jumped, Larry.

That's what I did, motherfucker!

- You are completely useless. - Come on, fuck it!

They are coming! I was driving!

You have served me faithfully. Do you want to mess with me?

- What's going on back there? - Yako!

- Oh, fuck you! - Try freezing again,

you morons!

- I feel life! - I don't know where we're going!

- In the warehouse! - What?

- Yako, you were right! - I told you so!

Hey... Stop!

- What? Why? - We lost Yakos!

- What? - We lost Yakos!

- Go back! - What?

Come back!

Say hello to my little blade!

- Dude! - Yako!

Shit... Yako!

Yak, man! Man, wake up!

- Is that what I think? - Yes. Do you feel it?

- Shit, they're coming! - The book saved me.

I'll catch you guys.

Let's go! Let's go! Let's go! Yes!

- We won't make it! - We'll make it! Don't give up...

- ...Mr Finland! - Mr. Finland? Do you find me attractive?

- What? No! - So I'm ugly?

What are you talking about, you fucker? We won't make it! Hold on!

- Yes, Yako. Shisoo! - Exactly! "Sisou perkele"!

Yes!

What's up with the fucking fog? We're not acting in a John Carpenter movie!

- Hey, what are you doing? - Someone survived.

Oh, okay.

Come on guys. We're wasting time.

- Come on, quick! Let's go! Let's go! - What? Oh, yes!

MAKING STOCKS WELCOME

Locked up. It should be in already.

- Hey! Open it! - Thanks for saving me,

beautiful foreigner

- Nothing. - My name is Joe.

- Natalia. - Has anyone ever told you...

- Hey, wait. Joe? - What?

- What the hell are you doing, huh? - What do you mean?

I saw her first.

- What? Come on, man. - Hey, don't call me "come on, man."

We have to enter from somewhere else.

He is like a dark angel.

Joe, look at me. I really like it, okay?

- We all like it. - Yes. We all like it.

No, man! You won't get her! Ok. Listen. Joe, I...

I saw her. Her and... her eyes.

I understand you. But the sea has other fish.

- Not this fish nonsense. - Do you prefer crabs, idiot?

- You are an idiot! - No, you!

- You! - Why are you fighting?

We have to go! We have company.

- Run, go, go, go. - Come on, Yako!

Yako, come on!

All doors are locked. We have to enter from somewhere else.

Hey, why don't we get the snowmobiles?

They will catch us.

The safest thing is to enter inside and let's dance.

Yes, Joe!

- Knock it off, man! - Stop!

Half. Yako? How, uh...?

- Easy. I have the keys. - Do you have the keys?

Why didn't you say so, idiot?

- Do you work here? - Yes, in a way.

- "Somehow..." What do you mean? - It's... complicated. Ok;

- Oh, they're beautiful. - We have to get ready.

- For what? - For battle.

- Shouldn't we call the police? - I already did, as did many others.

- Sexy, sexy Christmas - Christmas...

I love this song. I had sex with it for the first time.

Me too. With your wife.

- What did the center say? - I don't know. Some bullshit

for small Crips that attack to people at Monster Fest.

Be careful!

What the hell?!

Do you need reinforcements?

You are hilarious.

Be careful!

They came out of the meat factory Saarioinen; I don't know what...

Like a pumpkin jumped a snowman,

And he was looking down on them and a Gremlin. Horror.

The end is near, motherfucker.

Mm, delicious. I love appetizers.

Oh, I love this guy!

Here Wild Pete, all ye that come, better not come!

Or come if you have drinks, fine. But then you have to leave.

They are dangerous. Better not come!

I need to calm my nerves and to definitely drink something.

Tommy.

Tommy!

Do you want to give me a hand?

Let's make a snowman!

What's going on here?

Horrible things happen in the Vuokatti ski resort.

Some tiny creatures invaded and they destroy everything.

And they kill people. And... I managed to escape

but i'm stuck here in the studio for hours

and I have them left alarmingly few drinks.

The weather tomorrow will be good

and the tracks well prepared. But don't come!

Yes, thank you.

Yako? Where is your gear?

Damn it.

Not bad at all...

- What do we do now, boss? - Our mission.

- Do we have an assignment? - Yes.

Let's kill them all.

Do you want to sit at the feet of the Saint?

I will win. No, no.

- Very hot. - Biff?

- What the hell are you doing here? - We're just trying to save ourselves.

I didn't talk to you, nerd.

- I spoke to my brother. - Yes...

- To your brother? - He's my half-brother.

Shut up, nerd! I told you never to come here!

- Leave him alone! - Hello.

You are that bitch from the rock band.

Want to have some fun?

- There's always room for a trio. - You're being a complete moron!

Shut up!

Bitch!

- Dare, gamioli! - You have a big tongue, nerd.

- Lost! - Come on, man...

Let me in!

Dammit, let me in!

Yako, talk to me. Who is he?

A drunk in a Santa Claus outfit. I think he wants in.

- And the Crips? - I don't see them. What should I do?

- Put him in! - No.

We'll get him in now.

The shop belongs to my father, so I'm in command.

Good night.

Put him in!

Hey, watch out!

are they ok

- This is strange - Yes.

Shit, The Crips! The Crips!

I'm doing it from here!

- Flip flops, you morons! - Biff!

Hey, Biff! Wait!

are you ok

"Fuck you, motherfucker!"

"Too Tough to Die".

Let's go! Let's go!

Did you see this?

Psofa!

Come on, let's go!

IF YOU TOUCH IT, I WILL KILL YOU!

Come on, guys, let's go!

Let's go, let's go! Come on.

- Oh, shit. Shit. - Don't you have it on silent?

- It's my birthday today. - Really?

Yes, I'm turning 20.

Nice. Nice. I'm turning 17.

Again, the silence it would be better.

Make your daddy proud, little albino.

Come on guys, attack!

Back!

It was incredible!

What the hell?!

Hello!

Forgive me for her uninvited entry,

but it appeared that you were needed help. So, I came.

"We needed help" and popsicles!

- Thank you. - Yes. Thank you very much...

- ...charming stranger. - What can I say?

I happened to be in the neighborhood.

"He just happened to be in the neighborhood," and papayas!

Hey, how did you get in?

From the back door. It's open. I went straight in.

- "He went straight in..." - Joe. I caught it.

- Sorry. - You are...

Looks like the party will light up.

Very soon.

Time out! Do you know something? Thanks for stopping by,

but we had it under control. So thank you...

Hey, kid. I don't want to put it this way, but...

i am the only hope that you have left. What do you say, chief?

can i stay

Hey, chief. I'm 17, dammit.

I'm happy for you, kid. Nice age.

Yes!

- You have some plastic there. - Yes?

- You don't want to choke on it. - Bro, it has gluten.

Wait, does it have gluten? Shit!

- No, no, no... - Okay. All right, Yako.

Ladies, don't worry. I will watch out for you.

It looks bad.

- Jacques. - What? What?

- Is the guy okay? - Yes, yes, for sure.

- Yako, can we go somewhere? - There, there is a bar.

- Okay, okay. - Up... in the mountains.

Okay, great. Drive us, okay?

To drive... Like a boss?

Yako, you look upset. Can I help?

Guys, I have an idea!

Wow, like a boss.

Actually, you're not the boss, Yako.

- Yes, I am now. - Is he the real one? The real...

For legal reasons, I would not complete this sentence.

Shit!

Enough.

Man, why are you stopping?

What is it?

I waited years to i do this

- Do what? - Yako...

...we have discussed this with the psychiatrist, right?

Yako, what are you going to do?

Hasta la vista, morons.

No, no, no...!

Farts!

- Are you happy now, Yako? - Yes, I am.

Fine, then I'll cancel our date next week with dr. Landis.

Yes, okay.

- Did you plan this? - Yes.

- I hated this store. - Yako, you are crazy.

I'll find you, morons.

- What sounds are these? - What?

This is the explosion.

- Go on, Yako. - Yes, yes...

Sounds like someone to have to take it all off.

No, no, okay. Thank you, K.I...

For legal reasons, I would not complete this sentence.

Here it is. The chalet bar.

Have we arrived? Okay, quick! Let's go!...

I wish you a perfect and productive night. Give it your all!

It's coming, it's coming.

- Do you have a key for it? - Yes, yes...

- it belongs to... my stepfather. - Yes? So, yes.

- So no. - Come on, fuck it!

I was kidding.

Yako? Where is the restroom?

- Back. - Back? The volcano is boiling.

Oh, that fucking gluten, dude Wild thing.

Come on, guys, let him go.

- And don't turn on lights. - But... the bar?

- Okay. But only at the bar. - Thank you.

Yeah, hey.

Man, I wonder what Natalia is thinking. She's burning a nail or...

...you say he likes it and to say:

"I like a man who is not afraid to lose in front of everyone.

He is so masculine and tough, that spills in front of everyone

and fills the room with farts. It's complete."

It's complete.

Right?

"Chicane".

Yako, the house looks like it with christmas tree.

- I only said the bar. - Thank you.

Nice here.

"Cocktail"!

Do you want one?

No, I mean like in the movie with Tom Cruise.

- Mr. Diarrhea, how are you? - I'm fine now.

Guys, I just wanted to say that... I'm so sorry.

It's very embarrassing. It's never happened to me before.

Don't go to the toilet for 35-45 minutes.

- Amen. - Yes.

- Yako, I have to ask you something. - Yes?

- Where did you find the book? - Oh, this...

I found it in the forest. He saved me.

It has some very strange things. Like she has diarrhea...

Diarrhea?

- Do you mind if I keep it? - No, of course.

It helps in emergencies situations.

I'm thirsty

I have an idea.

- Will there be a party here? - Something like that.

Yako?

- What's in this? - Vodka only.

can i say something

I just want...

I don't know you that well.

And the day today was very strange.

Everyone makes fun of me all the time

and they tell me that I am nothing.

But you showed me that life is worth living

and you have to fight for her.

Sissou perkele!

- Shisoo! - Shisoo!

- Cheers, guys. - Yes, to our health.

Very good.

i love you

We love you too, Sloth.

- Well... - "Sloth"?

- Yes. From The Goonies. - Yes.

Can I participate?

Certainly. I don't care.

That "end of the world" vibe makes me want company.

Truth;

You are very brave, you know?

What? I; Hey, get out of here!

- Do you want me to leave? - What? No. No, no...

I... uh... I want...

Okay.

Great... Sorry. Firstly...

thanks for that. And secondly... wait a minute

- What are you doing? - Uh... bon appetit, huh?

- Hello. - Hello.

What news?

- Very nice speech. - Thank you.

- Just like you. - Nice?

Yes. Nice.

You are super gorgeous. Super.

- But... Do you want to drink tea first? - Do you want to have sex?

Half a minute...

Definitely. Certainly.

- If we are to die... - I don't want to die a virgin.

- Maybe I can help with that. - Please help me, sister.

Please help me.

- Are you okay? - Yes. Yes.

are you calling your friend?

No. No... I haven't.

I just wanted to talk to my parents.

- Where is it? - It's in New Mexico.

I am from Kiev, from Ukraine. But I moved often as a child,

because of my father's work.

I never felt that i belong somewhere

I've always lived in Oregon.

I can't say I identify.

It's silly to think about, but...

I wish my father didn't had ever taken a job at Chicane.

"Chicane"?

- The research center? - Yes. He is... a scientist.

- I'm getting married. - Yes.

I would just like to I saw him more often.

- Sorry. - It's okay.

So...

- You don't like them? - What...

- Oh, these? - Yes.

No.

Joe. Jacques. K.I.T.T.

No. I mean... No.

It's strange you say that, where do you mention it?

Why, uh...

Basically...

...I like you.

do you like me

Yes. Um, my... I like you very much.

I find you very beautiful...

Okay, I got it. So, for the record:

I don't think you're that bad either.

- Oh, you have a sense of humor. - Yes, I have.

I know the timing he's not perfect

but... i wonder if you would like

dance with me now

Jacques, we have no music.

So...

We can have.

You horny ones, don't you just want to have sex?

Before the end of the world?

I just want to dance.

With you.

Joe!

- Fuck me! - Yes? Ok.

Come on, don't stop.

Oh, Joe!

Wait! Stop! Stop! Half a minute!

- No, no! - What?

Slap me! Slap me!

I need to find the song.

- You might know. - Yes?

- Okay. - Calm down, Don Juan.

You are gorgeous.

Sissou perkele!

What happened to the lights?

You don't want to know.

Happy Birthday.

- It's a mess here, Biff. - Shut up!

you can run but you can't hide.

Not on my shift.

Merry Christmas.

- Do you see the scar? - Where did you get it?

- From a fight. - A fight?

- Yes. With a cat. - True?

Adult. Yes...

Well, we got it. You had sex.

- Well, no, we didn't. - How did you come up with that?

What happened to the bulbs? Short circuit?

On the fury, and uh...

Guys, guys, guys!

- I think I got it. - What?

This morning when we left from home...

there was green smoke in the forest.

- I don't remember. - Then let me explain.

Ah, what's up, huh? What... What is this?

You don't see, you fools that I have a bigger tool?

IT'S GREEN SMOKE, GUYS!

- Right! Don't you remember? - I still don't remember.

No! I saw that too and when...

What the hell?!

Hey, Cargiole. Where did everyone go?

I'm Joe. Zack's best friend.

- Zach's dick is much bigger. - I love him so much.

I never saw that! Okay, let's move on. Sorry.

- Then Yako said: - I'm not very good at it,

but i think they all went from here.

No, that's not right. Your accent is kind of...

"Yes, I'm Yako..." No, I'll try again.

I'm not the best

but i think everyone went from here.

I keep doing it.

- It looks pretty pathetic. - It's still not right.

- Yeah, that sounds cool. - Cool?

- Yes, yes, it's good. - Nice.

You made it.

Anyway...

What about green smoke?

Wait.

It's coming.

And this looks like party with sexy nuns.

And then there's this shit 80s party! It looks perfect!

Perhaps nothing had happened at all if we had gone there. Where;

What does all this have to do with it? with the Crips?

Children.

Every time we killed one of those Crips...

green blood was being thrown. Correctly;

And their eyes glow green.

Just like...

the smoky Northern Lights.

No;

- In the book Yako found in the forest... - This is my book.

Yes, it's your book. You found it in the woods.

This has the answer for what's going on here.

- You mean the Crips. - Yes, exactly!

They are evil spirits from another dimension.

- Very cool. - Yeah, it's cool, Yako.

And this book is like a diary, with pictures for all of them. Look!

Here is the machine he created the smoke.

And someone designed it.

But why?

I think I have it!

Someone hates ski resorts.

No; Okay, no, forget it.

Well, it looks like it all started in World War II.

But I can't read it, it is in German and Russian.

And then it has Nazi logos and crazy plans and...

and Chicane.

The "Chicane"? My father's Chicane?

Yes. And there is some connection to the Crips.

And I believe, I firmly believe,

that the origin of these madmen, killer snowmen

connected to... this green smoke.

Yes! Green smoke, baby!

No, no, not like grass. No... like... the green...

From the machine, the machine. Not like grass. From the machine.

"Shall we go build a snowman?"

No.

I want to kill him, dammit.

That sounds like a cliche plot

from a second rate horror film.

But...

in this case it could indeed... to be true.

Thanks.

- Do you mind if I do this? - No problem.

OK, then...

- What's going on there? Are we seeing a kiss? - What's going on here?

Stop, Satans!

I think... that this is the "Chalet of Love".

I know where you are.

Shit...

Um... sorry, guys. He's my dad.

- Come to bed. - Okay. I'm coming

Hi, Zac. Probably you are already sleeping

If he knew the truth...

I just wanted to tell you happy birthday

I have a little surprise for you... ok, a big surprise.

I can't wait to see her. Do you know something?

I am very proud of you. And I love you, son.

I love you too, dad.

- Good evening. - It's Christopher Lambert!

And they say...

that Finland is one of them safest countries in the world.

I hope you don't mind. I'll be leaving soon.

No problem.

You are the superstar of Hollywood.

- It's me. Yes. - Um...

- Are you okay? - You... I love you.

You must be Zach.

- Do you know my name? - Of course.

- Your father told me about you. - My father?

Yes. He wanted me to wish you happy birthday

On this really crazy day.

I'm dreaming, right? Dream;

- No... - Always remember:

Just remember... So choose the best one.

Fight for what you think is right.

Be surrounded by friends and people you love

and who care about you.

Follow the passion and your dreams.

And always believe in yourself.

It's crazy.

Go and chase the biggest one gift of all. The life.

Be kind and good,

and see everything with an open heart.

Then I promise you: your dream will come true.

I believe in you.

Stay safe, guys.

I will come again.

Hey man, that was him Christopher Lambert, hey!

It was incredible.

Yes.

Thanks, Dad.

- I know what I have to do. - Me too.

- What is this? - Take one.

- No, it might bother me. - It has no gluten.

- Cookies... - You can eat them.

- Are you sure? - It's Biff's secret.

He has the same problem as you.

Besides, you need energy.

Well.

- Okay. Well, to our health! - To our health!

It's good.

Oh my god.

- It's very good. - Yes.

The taste is strange.

- What is this? - Bananas.

It was very good...

- Wait... - What was in those cookies?

- Like "The Birds". - Like Spielberg movies.

Dude, we're not going kill Kurgan?

The "Kurgan"? Guys, Yako he just mentioned "Highlander".

it's my birthday you must see it.

You will need this.

Damn...

- Thank you, Ramirez. - No problem.

The feeling you feel... It is alertness.

- What's going on here? - They are completely made up.

I feel it.

I can feel it!

- We are one. - Yes.

- We are brothers! - Yes.

Let's finish it!

Maybe I'll stay here and to protect the ladies.

- Yeah, man, cool. - Yes.

Hey Highlanders! Let's go get the jackets.

We have to leave. Your jacket was back there. Come on!

- Where are we going? - Hello, ladies.

- Just follow the cookie. - Take the cookie!

These are cookies.

- Today is my birthday! - Yes, happy birthday, Jacques!

Thanks, Joe!

Shit! Dead animal!

- I had sex! - I met Christopher Lambert!

Children! Plug it in!

- I'm not a virgin anymore! - I'm still a virgin! Yes!

- Dead animal! - Dead animal, yes!

Come on, let me! Stop!

We have arrived!

- Do you remember when we did this? - Which one?

- Let's get down from here. - When?

Damn it. You are here too!

- She is strong. - I like it.

- She is decisive and I love it. - Yeah, man.

First person game?

- First person gameplay. - Yes, bang!

- THE GAME IS LOADING... - Batman...

- MISSION: DESTROY THE CRIPS - Batman!

- You have a baseball bat. - Do you see?

Ok.

Shit!

- Three points! - Are you okay?

- Yes. And you? - I still have a full life.

Yes! They don't stop coming.

Just like the sexy nun.

Shit.

I got it!

Hey! Melting, baby!

Yes, man! Meltdown 2! The musical.

- Gamato. - I love it, bro!

Guys, come out of here! Come on!

- Jacques, come now! - Come here!

Jacques.

We have to close the door, let's go!

Come on, Zach, come on!

Come!

Wait... What's the plan?

Wow, this is genius.

- Clever. She is smart. - The smartest man I know.

Do you know that?

You are quite made, my dear.

Shit.

Come here.

God, it's disgusting.

It's disgusting.

The way it melts, it reminds me when i eat ice cream... Hi.

- I think he's playing a game. - Melting, melting!

You can unmask finally? Come!

Sorry. Don't leave me like this.

Tonight is the night but the farewell came

and I say goodbye to you.

- My God! - What a snake!

You mean my dick?

The police. Stop it!

Joe?

Zac?

Biff?

What the hell are you doing here?

How did you get in here?

- You wanted a threesome. - Yes.

- You're dead. - I have it.

- I have it. - Stay with us. No.

I don't even know your names...

I will protect you, ladies.

Nice little boxer. Where did you get it from?

From Losers "R" Us? Now way!

- No, Biff. You will leave. - What did you say?

You know, you're an idiot. And you know something else?

Life is too short to dealing with guys like you.

Fuck you, Biff!

Do you believe that these do they care about you?

I learned this from a true friend.

- Bastard! - I know you are.

- But what am I? - Hero!

That's right, hero.

"Back to the Future" is called, dumbass!

Hero! Hero!

come here

- Shall we continue, ladies? - Yes, yes...

- Can you pick me up? - Yes, come on.

This is difficult...

Dude, a car!

Perfect! What does mine say?

Do you see? A car, guys.

- I love this movie. - Me too.

- In the best three. - Three?

- Yes. - Pretty good.

Shit, what was that?

Did you hear that?

Man, you won't believe it.

It was my stomach.

My stomach, I'm hungry. I've never been so hungry.

Natalia, do you have anything to eat? We need food.

Guys, focus please! Oh my god...

I have a sandwich! From the warehouse...

Do you have a sandwich?

- What is it with? - I don't know.

- Is it made of wheat? - No, it's...

- I can't do gluten. - It's ham.

- Ham? - Yes, ham.

Children!

"Soviet Union."

Ah... Guys! Joe, Joe!

This must be the source.

"Highlander 5", bro!

How do we close it, guys?

Ah... The book! The answer is in the book!

The book. The fucking book.

The book. The book...

Let's jump on it with the car. Let's do this.

- You forgot the book. - Yes.

- Great. - Guys?

Let's shake it in the air.

What?

Ok;

man, are you ok?

All good.

- What the hell?! - Did you kill him?

No, he was already here.

He was already here when we came.

He is dead. This is not good.

This... is good. It's so good.

Zac?

- What, baby? - Okay, Mr. "I'm-20-years-old."

- You are cute. - You eat normal bread too.

Yes.

I finally found you.

Did he say... something?

What? It was simple:

Attack!

Shit!

Is this really happening? Ok.

Shit!

Not today!

Dude, watch out!

- It's snow! - Do I have to do everything?

Stupid snow!

Attack!

Aid!

Zack!

Ninja!

Stop!

No! You stink, man!

Zack!

Go away! On me!

Time to shake it up all up in the air.

Get up!

Thanks.

Thank you...

What...?

I have to cut the drugs.

- Where the hell is Zac? - I don't know. Come on, in the car!

Shit...

- Come on! - Shit.

- Where the hell is Zac? - No... Dammit! I was driving!

- Shit! - Let's go, let's go!

Hi... Are you ok?

You look very scary. Um... are you okay?

Let's go. Let's go. Let's go...! Okay, let's go!

I'm going to fuck them now those snowmen!

Ok. Let's go!

Ok. Ok. Let's go again.

Ok.

That hurt, man.

It was a hair.

Damn it!

Seriously now?

Oh, Lambert, please!

- Let's go, let's go...! - Okay. Ready;

- What the hell... - Okay! Again!

- Shit! Get stuck! - Let's go, I'm driving!

Damn it! The sign...

They came to save us!

Shit!

You will die, like all your kind.

We will travel through the gate in your world

and we will destroy him.

What? A portal?

Do you know something? You just made one classic evil mistake,

aspiring Kurgan.

You revealed your plan to me.

- It's too late. - Shit.

Please, please... Please! Wait, wait!

- Lamper! - Greetings, Jacques. did you call me

Go away!

In the end...

only one will remain.

Let's go, let's go! Zack!

Zac?

What does he do?

- The bread! Fucking genius! - What?

Do it, dammit!

What are you looking at, you fucker?

Don't you see it? I have a bigger tool.

I will fix you if you get in my way

I will level you. You will never be the same again.

What are you talking about?

- You heard me, bitch. - What are you saying?

Do you smell this? It's my shit! What are you talking about?

You heard me, bitch. What are you talking about?

Eat it, ass-Crips!

Yes!

Those wedding people.

This time they will shoot you, morons.

All haters and bitches here. Yes!

Shit! That was crazy.

- Catch it! - He caught...

There can only be one.

Sorry...

I get excited.

- Are you okay? - Now yes.

Brother...

So... We... we made it.

- Joe, come here! - Come on!

- Come on, hey! - Joey!

Do you see this?

The key.

It opens the worlds, unites dimensions, frees the spirits.

With this key I have the power!

What the hell?!

Give me the key!

- Gollum... Wake up! - What?

man, what happened to you?

You've had a Lord of the Rings crisis.

What? I...

- And now? - Shit. Let's do it.

Zack!

Come!

Yes, yes, ok!

Oh my god.

Damn it.

- This is serious bullshit. - They look real.

Yes.

At least they haven't green eyes.

Guys, the dead man stole the key from Chicane,

to free the spirits from the other dimension,

to finish what they started in World War II!

Excellent, Agent Mulder. Excellent.

Inform Chicane that we recovered it.

Received.

Ok. Let's... let's go from here, yes?

- You're right. He's always right. - Yes...

- Okay? - I got it, bro.

Yes!

It happened to us

but we survived the night

It doesn't matter anymore

because we are all alive

People died

and we should help them

Oh shit, you're right

We can make this world a better place

We are the world

We are survivors

We are the survivors from this bullshit

So let's sue in this fucking place

We are the world

We are survivors

We are the survivors from this bullshit

So let's sue in this fucking place.

- Shit. - What?

They are my parents. I'd better leave.

Guys... Come on.

Colleagues! It was incredible!

Yeah, man.

Just... Thanks for everything.

- I love you, man. - Me too.

Oh, yes. You better wash your hands.

come now

Yes, mom? Yes, I'm coming. The best birthday ever!

- Go away! - Yes, I'm coming.

- See you later. - I'm coming.

- It's form, huh? - Yes. Yes, it's fun.

- Well... - So.

And now?

Eh... I haven't been never in New Mexico.

Correctly. I think we need to change that.

- Really? - Yes.

- And how do you imagine this? - I think so.

You did well, kid.

You did well.

Hello, father.

Yako.

Hello, Dad. Do you want to participate?

God, no.

Double pleasure.

2 WEEKS LATER

What does he say, guys? This is Tom Cruise.

Just kidding, I'm Zach. But you know this.

Well, you must be wondering what happened after that day

My parents finally came

and we did a great one off-resort birthday parties,

along with Joe's family. They didn't know what had happened,

and believe me, we didn't open our mouth.

My father was thrilled...

...which I finally met Christopher Lambert, like me.

Who, by the way, escaped that night unscathed...

...and totally fucked Kurgan. Believe it or not...

...we kept in touch and called us...

...let's see "Highlander" with him whenever we want.

How perfect is that? You're probably wondering...

...what happened to Yako? well, this little minion...

...he was kicked out of the house. Now she lives with the two...

...gorgeous, sexy nuns, who also took a dog...

...and they named him Jacques. Sweet, huh?

Joe tried to send to a nun,

but unfortunately he writes him,

sad thing about him in many ways.

But I know, you want to know what about me and natalia.

And, I owe you the truth.

Well... we didn't go to New Mexico.

But he joined us in Oregon.

My parents loved her. And yes,

I fell in love with her too. She is incredible.

So guys, the lesson is as follows:

Don't be afraid to fall in love.

Sure, yeah, okay, sex is perfect.

But love... is even better.

Get out! Live new adventures, fall in love, open your heart!

And if you're already in love, protect this love.

Take advantage of the greatest gift that life offers you.

I quote John Hughes: "Life goes by too fast.

If you don't stop to look around sometimes, you can lose it."

It was over, Casanova.

Yes. And...

Okay, have... have a lot of sex.

Translation: Alex Suri GR (12/12/2025) ..: Movies by Alex Suri GR :..

I love you Mr. Snowman.

I will come again.

We're done.

I already know that. Yes, we are already in the air. Yes.

You're listening to Wild Pete. All good.

I'm fine. Everything is fine.

I know if you heard yesterday my show

could you believe

that... something really strange it happened here at the ski resort.

Like that some creatures they killed people.

But... I brought it to you.

Yes, it was all a huge prank.

Yes, the biggest prank I have ever does on this show,

the "Wild Pit Show". She was... she was big.

I was under the influence alcoholic beverages.

I think, mildly one or two more.

But... things like that happen.

It's just the usual hangover afterwards the regular annual Monster Fest,

like every year, and... The main thing is,

that our guest, Mr. Christopher Lambert is fine.

They are fine. And nobody he is not suing anyone

or nothing like that. So everything is normal again.

Forget it and, well, enjoy on this beautiful day here in Vuokatti.

Hey, do I have anything else to drink?

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