Original subtitles

Hello and good morning. The time is 8 a .m. We're taking this day off with all

the energy. Time sure flies, doesn't it? It's already December, which can only

mean one thing.

Christmas is right around the corner.

We are waking up to clear skies and cool temperatures today, which is perfect

for getting everyone...

into the Christmas spirit.

The lights are already twinkling across the city, the smell of hot chocolate is

in the air, and the carols, well, we've been hearing them for weeks now.

But finally, we're in Christmas mode.

Lucas, breakfast!

Yep, it's hard to believe, but it's me, Salvo Molina.

The same guy who had a rap sheet longer than Don Quixote.

Not that long ago, I'd have beer and some olives for breakfast at noon.

But since I saved Christmas a couple years back, and, well, Santa's ass along

with it, I am officially a good person.

My boy.

Dad. Morning, Lucas.

Hey, come on, listen. And even more important than that, now I'm a real

-up dad.

Thanks, Dad. It's really good.

Hey, this is the breakfast of champions.

Protein and nutrients and all that stuff you should be eating.

Let's make a toast.

Cheers. The new Salva spends quality time with his son.

Together at home.

Yo, again with the jam, dude? I keep telling you, savory in the mornings.

Well, okay. We're at my buddy Repeated's place.

But it won't be for long.

Because I finally have a job that I like. And it's all legit, too. Like I

I'm a good boy now.

Hey, you worker boy, that thing needs polishing, you hear? And you better not

try to stop until it shines like gold. Get my last two.

And hey, chicken breast sandwiches.

Yeah, I know that's what we don't want to be, but I got to do fitness.

Fitness? Exercise? Working out? Not that you'd know about that. Come on now,

fitness. One, two, one, two, fitness. I mean, it's not perfect.

Sometimes it's hard not to just say screw it all. All the sacrifices are

it, as long as my son is happy and he can be proud of his dad. Ah, there's my

son. Lucas!

What up, Dad?

You're here.

How did school go today?

Worse than work without pay. How did your day go? My job is a bummer and I

it so.

Oh, hey, what you got there?

What is that right there?

Will you look at that? It's two tickets to see Home Alone tonight for a special

screening. My favorite movie, Dad. The best surprise ever.

I've never been so happy. And the best part is the most wonderful time of the

year is coming.

Christmas?

Ho, ho, ho!

Time to wake up, little elves, because there's only one week left until

Christmas arrives.

The new day is beginning.

Let's get to work right away.

We'll do it all with joy and cheer.

Christmas is on the way. No way, stop!

You guys call that happiness and joy and cheer?

Huh?

Looks like we need a good dose of Christmas spirit around here. Ho, ho,

There's gonna be fun, there's gonna be fun. Join the party, it's just begun.

There's gonna be smiles, oh my, it's almost Christmas.

There's going to be light.

There's going to be light. Beautiful star raised by the fire. Wonderful

Oh, my, it's almost Christmas.

There's going to be fire and glass and all the fire.

It's time to get down to business.

Oh, come on, Robbie. You have to be such a stick in the mud, eh? There's time to

do it all. Oh, yeah? We still have to read all those letters in that pile.

It's just... Honestly, the kids could send audio notes, couldn't they?

Come on, here she comes. In just a few minutes, Planet Toys will open its

Did you add sugar? Yes, yes. Great.

Ma 'am, here, your matcha ice latte with a little cinnamon, absolutely no

lactose. Ugh, way too sweet, Sebastian.

I'm sorry, ma 'am. And where's the report? The report, come on. The staff

report. Here it is. Why did you have to put sugar?

Hmm, too many here. Five need to go.

We already have the designs for our new empowerment doll. Mm -hmm. Too many

curls, and she's way too short. Fix it.

Hello there.

Come on.

Sebastian? Yes, what is it?

Why are they just standing around? Good question.

Back to work. Go on. Get those doors open.

Do you think you work at a DMV?

Christmas is here.

Let's go, Sebastian.

Yes, ma 'am. Good morning. How's everyone doing?

Everything's great, right? I love it.

Come on. Yes.

I called you all together urgently to discuss something that could change the

course of this company forever. Bravo.

You are all aware that Planet Toys is now the number one company in the world.

And our products are the most sought -after gifts on all the key holidays of

year. That's all holidays.

Yep. Except one.

And why aren't we selling at Christmas?

Because all of you are incompetent. Of course.

But above all, it's because of the relentless beast we've spent years of

lives looking for.

Oh, Bigfoot. No, it's got to be the Loch Ness. No, no, I think it's a

chupacabra. It's Elvis.

He's alive.

Shh, shh, shh.

Guys, it's Santa Claw, or Kris Kringle, or whatever you want to call that fat

doofus who's competed with toy companies for decades on end.

The kids don't have to buy toys because he goes and gives them.

He gives.

Sebastian, you say it. I can't. I keep on gagging. He gives them all.

For free. And then what do they do to get those toys just be good? It's

disgusting. Several years ago, we launched a program to geographically

Santa, and we have invested significant time and money into it.

But a few years ago, at a hospital in Madrid, there was a miracle that

Christmas.

Nicholas!

Santa Claus for real? The old man wasn't lying?

Well,

luckily for me, that nurse was one of my second cousins and mentioned it to me

at a family reunion.

She's not my favorite cousin.

So I kind of ignored her.

But then... Isn't that funny?

All that money you invested, and we get that clue at your nephew's communion.

Your timing, Sebastian, is always so off.

Sorry.

On this card, there are coordinates.

And now we know where he lives.

Now all we have to do is execute our plan. We kidnap old Mr. Santa Claus, and

make sure we never have to compete again.

But the world will wonder where Santa Claus is.

Allow me to introduce the man who will replace Santa Claus to the world. What's

up, everyone?

When do I start, boss?

Hey, back off, Romeo.

This guy's way too skinny.

He's not like Santa at all.

Fellow sure likes to talk.

I present to you Mauro Quezada, an impersonator.

An impersonator?

Please, you guys. I'm an actor. A truly dedicated method actor who creates all

his characters from the inside. And plus, you got a real chameleon here. My

acting range is so wide and diverse, it covers all styles from classical theater

all the way to the most avant -garde. Even more importantly, I have a raw

for characterization and in -depth portrayal. Okay.

Well, I think that's been made clear.

Crystal clear, babe.

Refocusing here. Right. After Santa's been kidnapped, all the parents in the

world have got to pay up or their kids don't get any presents this year.

Yes, ma 'am. One question. What does Mr. Anselmo think about this?

Like, what kind of question is that, Grandpa?

My father retired years ago.

I've told you all repeatedly.

Now I'll finally be able to prove to him that I can run this place as well as

him or better. Better. Is that quite clear?

Sebastian? Yep.

Put on a coat because you're headed to the North Pole.

You'll see. Christmas is ours.

Yeah!

Yoo -hoo!

Christmas is almost here, and you can feel it in the air.

Come on, you guys.

You're so out of shape. Your butts are too big. You need to work out, huh?

Go, Dasher. Go on, Prancer.

Hey, Luis Alberto, let's go.

You look like a rookie. Hey.

I love Christmas.

Let's do our acrobatics, all right? A 360.

Let's go.

Hey,

very good. I almost tossed my cookies.

All right, let's get cracking. Now burn those hooves like infested furious.

Yeah!

I don't want to. Carlitos, eat your broccoli.

I don't want to. Eat your broccoli and behave, or this Christmas Santa Claus is

going to give you coal.

Mom, that's just silly.

Don't be silly, young man. You better eat this broccoli if you think Santa

is going to bring you everything on that list you made.

Begin hustle to fight the scooter.

You want all that stuff? Eat your broccoli.

Yes, yes.

Broccoli is both tasty and healthy, eh?

That was loud.

Man, I'm hungry.

Come on, let's get back, guys. There's chorizo mac and cheese, there's prawn

rice pudding, and tres leches French toast all waiting. Away!

landing, you guys.

We've earned our dinner tonight.

Oh, jeez.

Who is that?

Hey there. Sir, can I help you with something?

Mother of mercy.

It's a human being. I've walked for 12 hours and penguins are all I've seen. By

Rudolph's red nose, my goodness, you're frozen solid.

Uh -huh.

Don't worry, you're safe with us. But how did you manage to land here?

Well, I was on a guided tour through the fjords, and I was distracted at the

souvenir shop buying, well, nothing, a fridge magnet I collect, you know? And

those folks don't wait for anyone, so I missed the bus. So I said to myself,

since I'm alone, I'll see the Northern Lights, because I heard their glorious

behold, but now I'm lost and I can't find them.

Goodness, that story is, uh, kind of long.

But, well, enjoy, the Northern Lights are right here.

Oh. So beautiful, but... Oh, jeez, my eyelashes are frozen.

Don't you worry. Come to my workshop. No, no, no. Better yet, tell me, where

I find the closest town?

Hey, don't put that so close to my face, son. I can't see anything.

Ah! What's going on here? How about that shot?

The bun is in the oven. Yeah, the bird is in the cage. Uh -huh. And the rat is

trapped in the... Well, you get it. We have Santa Claus.

Salva, come on, bro. Please, Salva, I'm your friend. Help me out, man. Salva,

come on, please. It's going to be so easy. We just go in, grab the stuff, and

leave. It'll be easier than taking candy away from a kid.

No way. After our adventure with Santa Claus, I'm living an honest life.

No robberies. I have a job that's legal, and I pay all my taxes.

I recycle.

I eat more salad.

You're pathetic.

I mean it. Did you also start playing shuffleboard, dude? No shady stuff,

Rafita. Come on, go.

I don't want trouble for my boss. It's the simplest job ever. It's all in there

waiting, unguarded. Oh, like, take me, dude. It's not taking it as a crime,

okay? If I had a dollar for every time I heard that, I could retire.

You think you'll ever retire by doing honest work?

This is Spain, all right?

No, Rafita. I said no. Okay, well, I say yes. It's no. It's yes. It's no. It's

yes.

It's no.

Wait, what did you say at the end, man? It's no. It's yes. It's yes. It's no.

Look at that Roman scene. The scum of the earth is arguing over here.

Yes, no, yes, no, yes, no.

What are you, an ambulance?

Ambulance!

You'd rather keep working for these guys than come with me and rob this spot.

I don't have that many options for work. Hey, sell the sidekick.

You know, if you want, we can hire you, too, huh? Look at his arm flopping

around like that, all tired.

That's got to get us a tax deduction.

My God, Sava, have some dignity. This Ramoncine guy's your boss. Yes, that's

what you think. I'm his boss. Now get out.

Hey, hey, I'm no delinquent. An outsider, yeah. I'll take that.

Hey, hey, that wrench he's got is ours.

Oh, yeah.

Oh.

Get out.

From your check. We'll take it out of your paycheck.

Hey, back to work.

Yes, boss. Okay.

Uh -huh. That's it, Ramoncine.

Okay, get out. All right, let's all come down and take our seats. Gentlemen,

gentlemen, let's take our energy levels down.

Grab your seats and load your little beats.

Great. And before we start class today, I have something important to announce.

Have none of you realized that basically exams are an obsolete grading system

that reduces our human complexity to a simple number?

No, they've realized you're a weirdo and they're shipping you back to Planet

Dork. Yes!

That's it, Jesus.

How good would it do?

Today we have a new student coming in who just moved here to our city. Dude, I

hope they don't put her with me. Yeah, you and I will be partners.

I'd like to introduce Mia!

This seat is free. Here.

Next to me. Over here. This is your seat.

What's that? Hi. Anything you need, let me know, okay? Look, it's right here.

Shut it. Like anything. If you need a pen, an eraser, or my heart.

Sorry. Homework.

Do you always talk so fast, man?

Take that.

Diastolic. I'm the loser.

Classic, dude. We have an inside joke.

You're not getting him back for that?

He fit.

Oh, you guys. Shut up.

Come on.

Do it, Adam. Go on.

No, come on. Please. It's too early in the week. It's not even Wednesday yet.

Oh, God. They're going to kill me by Friday.

We haven't been introduced formally.

I'm Lucas, and this is Ruben, and he's heading out. See you later, Ruben. Talk

to you tomorrow. Okay? Bye now. Okay.

So, you're my Mia.

Not like I think you belong to me, or you're my girlfriend, or just that I

was... Uh, I liked your board thing.

If you're from this century, you would call it a deck.

Yeah, yeah, I love to skate. Yeah, I love skateboarding in the morning, in

afternoon, and at night, I fall asleep with it in my arms.

Uh -huh, and then when you board, are you into crashing, or downhill, or

freestyle?

A little of everything, you know? Triple threat. Yeah, I do it all.

It's my dad.

How did school go today?

Good. Good, yeah. Good, like always.

But wasn't it worse than work without pay?

No, it really wasn't. Will you wait outside?

Well, guess how my day went.

It's still a bummer. I hate it so.

It's the robot, right? With the job? And he hates it so?

Look at this dude. What's the deal?

Nothing. I'm fine. Totally normal.

Well, today is not going to be normal.

because we're going to go pick out our very own Christmas tree, bud.

Come on, Dad. I'm not a little kid.

And I'll lift you up at home to put the star on the tree.

Oh, one year I forgot, and you should have seen the tantrum and the pouting.

Dad, I want to do it. I do the star.

Really, I think he got so upset that he peed himself.

I did not. He just likes to make things up. All that, he was lying. Come on,

please, Dad.

I'm with a friend.

I'm sorry. I was being rude, dear.

What if we go together and play at a game center?

Uh, no, no, no.

Uh, that sounds rad. Thanks a lot. But then, uh, see you later.

Hey, before we leave, can you pick that up, Dad?

What's that? My dignity, because you left it dying there on the floor.

Oh, Lucas, I didn't get that. That's the problem. You don't get anything.

What happened? I don't get it.

Where is this?

What a headache. Gosh, this is worse than a hangover from elf punch.

Anyone in here?

Who is that?

Did you bring me here?

Those three wise men sent you, huh?

Those mobsters aren't camels, right?

No. I'm a humble businesswoman from a multinational.

Leading toy conglomerate who's done losing.

I don't understand. Losing? What are you losing?

Don't act like you don't know. You're not paying any business taxes. You're an

independent contractor. Your elves are employees and you're not getting charged

for them.

Everything I do is so that good children always get their presents.

So good children always get their dumb presents.

This year, it won't matter if they've been bad or good. The only important

is having the money to buy them. And buying them from me.

That goes against the spirit of Christmas and the magic, all the good

Give me back my magic hat.

No.

How can you possibly act so cynical? I mean, were you never a child?

A child who woke up excited on Christmas morning and ran in to see what I had

put for you underneath the tree?

Have you sincerely forgotten about your inner child?

for a new teddy bear, handmade by your elf.

Let's see here.

Honey, we don't send letters to Santa from this house, are we clear? That man

our competition, and we crush the competition.

But please, please, please, Daddy. All my friends write to Santa, and I want to

do it for Christmas, too.

Honey, all your friends are idiots. You need to know. But one day, my business

will be yours, and you'll learn toys are not donated.

Toys are sold to earn money.

Okay.

And this thing.

Bye -bye.

Hey, hey, hey, hey, hey, hey. Don't be trying that.

Okay? This is not about me and what you didn't leave under the tree. And the

important thing here is that you, sir, are finally done. No, no, not a chance.

You haven't thought about the children. They won't accept Christmas without

their hero.

And they will have their hero.

Morrow.

Hey.

What's up, Gramps?

But I, but I, I don't.

Ho, ho, ho!

Ha, ha, ha!

It's just the ho, ho thing. I don't have that down yet.

Use your solar prex, as you know. Ho, ho! Wait a minute! Who do you think you

are? Maro Quezada. Pleasure. He's such a great actor, willing to join us all for

the cause.

You're nothing but an imposter, a fraud. You're a... Ooh, one of the best actors

in the world at the moment. And I'm an expert in impersonations, my man. You

want to see one? Check this out.

What's shaking, cat, huh? You want a wine cooler with some bread and butter?

Or would you like a nice white with some sea shells and a captain's platter?

Why, I oughta.

I want some sausage with garlic bread and marinara. Ha ha, nailed it, right?

You are just a marvel. Thanks a lot. But we gotta get you to the North Pole

quickly before they find out Santa's missing, right?

Sure. You won't get away with this, you can't. Oh, really? I can't? Well, look.

One step...

Another step? Oh, hey, it appears that I can't after all. I won't allow you to

trick the children.

You won't keep me locked up here. I've gotten into houses with the most

sophisticated security systems.

I've slid down some of the skinniest chimneys in the world, and I can do

anything with my magic hat.

Yeah, you wish. You mean this hat?

Give that back now, you hear? The rest of your life will be spent forgotten in

that sarcophagus.

Just like Louis XIV.

Or wait the Count of Monte Cristo.

Except a little fatter. Maybe you want to lose that belly.

Hey, listen.

I can give those little gnomes a message if you like. Elves understand.

They are elves.

Yeah, right. Whatever you say.

And game, set, match.

Well, isn't this a charming little country house?

Oh, how adorable.

They're like little mushrooms.

What are you guys, the Minions, the Littles?

Where are all your shelves?

Way too small to make a meal.

I had a gnome on the lawn that was taller than you.

How can you say that, sir?

And your little ears, did those get Wi -Fi? Are you okay, Santa? You're acting

unusual. Well, look who's finally here. So you did decide to come for dinner.

Where have you been? I was scared that something had happened to you out there.

Sorry, who are you? Grumpy Smurf? It's Remy, your foreman for centuries. How

about a little bit of respect, huh?

Hey, chill, Ramen. I was playing. Remy. Uh, yeah, that.

You can smell that too, right? It's that deer smell. It lingers hard.

You've been drinking.

No, I... I was training with Rudolph and all the other... the deer. The

reindeer. That, yeah.

Well, all right. Less speaking, more working. You know what you have to do.

on. Who's in charge here? Me or you? Of course I know that.

The stuff, you know.

The usual Santa thing.

Everything that I usually... You read the millions of letters that you have

left? Ah, that's right. See, I told you I knew. I've been doing this for

centuries. But I think that first I...

I'd like to get situated, and you can get something for me to eat. Come on,

Robin. Go ahead.

What?

Hey,

Lucas!

Lucas!

You don't need to knock. I need privacy.

I did knock, but you couldn't hear your headphones on.

Huh? You can't hear me with your headphones on. You don't gotta yell.

What are you wearing?

I told you to let me know if you were doing a play at your school.

So what's your part, huh? Are you playing a clown?

No. This is my new look. I was going for street, but you won't get it. You're

too old.

I'm old? Please, I'm not old. I still listen to Pearl Jam on my iPod. You

to who, did you say?

A band that's way better than the ones you like. The ones that yawn while

they're singing.

The photos.

Dad, just leave it alone, you boor. What do you need? Some time with you, son.

I haven't really seen much of you at all lately.

Want to go buy some comics?

No. Movie theater?

No. Foosball, yeah? No.

We'll get burgers.

Dad, you're a weirdo.

Well, Lucas, what's the matter? You put on these strange clothes. You're really

moody. You don't want to do anything with your dad.

Is everything okay? Yes, I'm the same as... Hey,

it's just cracked, huh?

Just leave me alone. You don't get me. Come on, get out of here. Go.

You just don't get... He says I don't get him. And I mean, it's totally clear.

The kid is starting to go through puberty.

This is horrible. I'm not ready for this. No, no, you're not ready. You're

Heads up.

All right, listen, it's all good.

It's the law of humanity. We grow up like Robin Hood.

No, Peter Pan. Peter who? Who doesn't get older.

No, but didn't you say he was getting old?

What are you saying?

I don't know, Saba. I was confused.

Okay, whatever.

This would have been our first Christmas alone.

Well, and with me, right? I'll be there.

And with you, yes, with you. But Lucas doesn't care about me anymore. He used

be his hero, and now it's like I'm his enemy.

Man, that's the case with all of us. Look at your father. Look at mine, okay?

only saw him once a month.

Well, your father was in the can because he stole from the Toro La Dona's

casino, Rafita. You only saw him in prison. Oh, yeah. Well, thanks a lot,

You just have to force me to think about the saddest time of my life, right?

Sorry, really, Rafita, but I'm worried about this. Lucas is all that I have

Don't worry, man. The two of us went through all of that, and look around

Look how well we're doing.

God, Rafita, this is worse than I thought.

No way I can lose my son. If you don't want to lose him, you're going to have

win him back.

You know, maybe what your son needs is to see his father has an actual pair of

balls and he'll help his friend handle a simple robbery.

I told you, I don't steal anymore, dude. I told you, I don't steal anymore,

dude. Jeez, this guy. Look, forget it, okay? I've got plenty of amazing friends

who will help me with this.

Hey.

Lolo.

Lolo.

Lolo, are you on pause? Hey, Lolo.

Lolo Musicolo.

Where'd you go just now?

DJing in space.

No, no, no, don't go to space. Stay right here. We're on a heist. Give that

here. I'll cut and you keep watch.

I really think that we should switch. I'm the lock expert. Well, I'm in charge

here. Since when are you the boss? Since I came up with the plan.

Well, maybe I don't want to keep watch.

Well, all right, fine.

You cut and I'll be on watch. No, it's better if I'm the lookout. I'm not a

fence cutter. I'm an expert with locks. So are you watching or cutting?

I watch, but because I say so. Not because you're in charge.

Yeah, yeah.

Oh, hey, Rafita, if someone comes, what do I say? Well, why don't you just say,

Rafita, Rafita, Rafita, someone's here. That's so boring, though. I don't know,

could we use like a secret code or something? Like I say, water, water, a

red, a poor mission, or what do you who, right? Fine, Lolo, say whatever you

want, but now just shut it. It's my decision?

Yeah. Okay, so basically that means I'm the boss of you. No, it means you need

to shut your mouth so I can focus.

Come on.

That's done. We're all good. Get inside.

Well, look, I think I'll decide that. I'm the boss. Yeah, sure. You're the

Oh, is that right?

Ferris wheel time, dude.

Oh, no, no, no, no. Not the Ferris wheel.

Wait, wait, wait.

They're going to catch us. Come on, come on, come on. Let's go inside. All

right.

Come on, come on. Listen, okay, dude?

No more Ferris wheel while I'm working.

It's this one right here.

Rafita! Yeah, what is it?

Want to get to the scene of a crime?

The adrenaline and everything, I gotta... You gotta pee or what? No, the

number too.

I need to drop the kids at the pool. Hey, no, no, no, you better squeeze

cheeks. Let's go in there, fill our bags with all the loot, and we can get our

butts out of here.

Then you can poo an ocean.

Don't say that word, or the golfer's leaving the hole.

God, Lolo, that's disgusting. Get that side, all right?

Got it?

Hey, what is this?

This. This is a state -of -the -art doll.

Worth a fortune. We're going to steal them all, and then we'll sell them for

twice the cost online.

Hello, sister.

I'm Greta, the empowerment doll.

Well, I'm Lolo, and I come from San Fermin. And I'm the boss of the gang.

Uh, wait.

What's our gang called, by the way? Our name is Turn That Off and Shut Up or

They'll Catch Us. No, that's terrible. Wait, wait a minute. Turn it off.

It's not turning off. It won't turn off.

Come on, shut it down. It won't turn off. And now she's winking. You

her. Greta, just shut up. Shut up.

Hey, who's over there?

He's the boss. I just take orders. He's my cousin Rafita, and he lives over on O

'Horo Street.

I'll see you later.

What a snitch. Rat, you're a rat.

Hey, no, stop right there.

Hey, hey, don't you move.

Hang on a minute.

Get him. Grab him.

Can't even steal a piece for Christmas.

Hello?

I wasn't sitting, okay? Just a little hide -and -seek.

I know that voice.

Rafita, is that you?

Rafita, answer me!

God? Are you talking to me?

Don't punish me, please.

Only one of my arms works.

What are you talking about, man? It's Santa Claus!

I'm here, I'm trapped inside!

Santa Claus?

Wait a minute. Santa?

What are you doing in there? That's amazingly cool.

Wait, I get it. You're sleeping in a coffin like Dracula, right?

Oh, jeez, Rafita, don't be silly. I'm the victim of a kidnapping.

Someone kidnapped you? Have you come to save me?

No, man. I came to save myself, actually. What happened? Did they also

kidnap you?

No. I was here to rob a toy store, but it... Robbery?

Whatever, never mind. Can you help me get out of here? We have to escape,

Yes, of course, man. I'll open this up right now, one arm and all.

Dang, this is really pretty heavy.

Hey, be careful out there.

Oh, God, God, Sandy, are you kidding?

Just chill, okay? Stay cool, and we'll get this figured out.

I know it.

kind of weird that no one is wearing as much protection as you? I asked you to

come for moral support, not to make me more nervous.

Hey, there she is.

Hi, Mia.

Sup, girl. Are you flexing or... Flexing?

Don't you mean skating?

You know, we're at a skate park.

Yeah, yeah, yeah.

Totally. Yeah, yeah. I come here to do my old school skating tricks on my board

and chill.

Well, you haven't done a lot with that one, huh?

You still have the tag on it. It's just that I break my deck so often that I get

a new one every week.

Butthead. Hey, man, what are you doing here? Well, um, I really missed you guys

being bullies. Thanks for showing up. Look at these losers.

Hey, they're playing chess the next three down, okay?

I don't know what's so funny about chess.

It's a fine, strategic game of war that requires intelligence and planning.

Checkmate, four eyes.

Anyway, I'm here because I like to skate. But you haven't even touched that

thing. Yeah, it's new with tags, dude.

Yeah, is that good?

How about a demonstration?

Yeah, show off your girlfriend.

It's just that right now, you know, I'm pretty cold and I need to skate a

little. Or I'm risking getting injured. You know, what you risk is looking like

a coward.

Lucas, don't do it. You don't have to prove anything at all. Look at the guy.

wants to skate. Go on. It's okay. This is a warm -up. Seriously. It'll be cool.

Don't stress.

I'm going to record it, right? Yeah, yeah, yeah. All right. Let's see it.

going to do it. He's going to do it. We've got to record it.

Totally going to... Yo, go on.

Go on, go ahead.

Go do it. Time for love in literature is poetic, but it sucks if it's in

reality.

Come on, loser.

Whoa,

yay. Matchable stage trick, dude. Oh, God, he said I know it. I'm going to

this to TikTok.

Man, I'm going viral for sure.

Are you okay? I told you.

No, no, I'm not.

Love is really hard.

Wow, what a feast this is. And this punch is absolutely delicious.

I think I could really get used to living here.

Huh? Oh, I said, you little dwarfs are really great.

Are you about done, sir?

Yeah, take it all out of here.

There's a cookie for the elves there. Hey, I'll take that cookie. Give it

But you always leave one for us.

It's our most favorite dessert. Isn't that a pity?

I guess every day isn't a holiday. Go on now, guys. Get to work.

Mother of God.

These guys work so frantically.

I'm tired just watching.

Man, you look busy as bees.

Oh, no, this is nothing. We can take it up a notch.

Maximum overdrive, Al.

So damn quick.

sure you're not adding anything to your coffee? Can I please ask what you're

doing?

That was terrifying.

Are you a ninja? I mean, what the heck?

I have to put a little bell on you like you're a cat.

What is it? It's nothing. I just wanted to see how you were doing with the kids'

letters.

Well, Ramen, look, I won't lie. Really bad.

The whole subject is exhausting.

All the letters say the same thing. Santa, I promise I was so good this

swear.

You only really need to read one. And plus, these kids, they're real idiots.

There's spelling mistakes all over the letters. This year, I'll just give

everyone a lump of coal. I honestly don't know what's going on with you.

just... I don't recognize you. You don't recognize... Are you implying that I'm

not the same Santa? Any more unfounded accusations like that and I'll... I'll

demote you to a regular gnome.

Get out of here.

Go on, get... Bastion. Yes?

And what did we say about Santa hats?

Please make sure... Oh, there's a kid. So gross.

All right, so the stuffed toy should sit lower down so that the target customers

can see which are kids from zero to nine years old. Very well said, ma 'am. Very

impressive. You, take that down. And reduce the educational games by ten

percent, okay?

Because this is fame, guys. You're so clever, ma 'am. It's spectacular.

What is this display? It's a complete nightmare.

How can we expect to surpass last year's numbers if the store is messy?

So many of us with college degrees and no one can build a pyramid of toys?

You're so right. So many degrees here and... Don't you have a doctorate?

And how's it going for our special guest?

Is he comfy in his little cage? Yeah, he's good. I mean, he keeps on saying

nothing without chocolate. He's got an insane appetite.

Well, he'll have to wait a little. He was kidnapped, not taken to a five -star

hotel.

By the way, random question.

You hate Santa so much. Is it something personal he did?

This isn't the teddy bear that I asked for from Santa Claus. I'm pretty sure

Santa figured that toys are really boring, and you're better off learning

ready to inherit the family empire.

What do you think? Want to play together, huh?

Come on, honey.

Multiply.

Of course it's not personal.

It was all about business. I told you. Understand?

It's not personal.

Okay, okay. All business, not personal.

Can I give you, like, a head massage for the stress?

Oh, cut that out. Get me an accounts balance. My office, ten minutes.

All right.

Such rage.

Thank you all so much. Thank you for this Oscar.

I really didn't expect it. I want to share this award with my fellow

Of course, a small...

Piece of this Oscar is yours as well.

Oh, my God, what?

Uh, hi, boss.

Morrow. Have you already forbidden the elves from making toys?

Better than that. I just recruited the best possible employees to work at

Toys. Watch, watch. Come on, little dorks. They work constantly, day and

They don't charge overtime, and they do it all joyfully, singing the whole time.

Well, that's even better than the factory in Bangladesh.

And there's one more thing.

None of the elves require contracts.

They don't need contracts?

Well, that's the very most beautiful thing I've ever heard of.

Please get them to start making toys for us right now.

Oh, that's done.

All you need to do at your end is raise my salary just a little. Make it 20 or

30%. That's no problem at all.

Well, then, do you think maybe we could raise mine? It's been frozen since...

Shut up. Right -o.

Thanks a lot, boss.

Who was that lady? And what were you saying about a salary to her?

When the grown -ups are talking, the little guy stays quiet.

Little guys.

Change of plans, all right? From now on, all the toys that we make in this

workshop all have to come from this catalog you see here.

Everybody got that?

Yeah, whatever you want, boss.

All right, light a fire under those tushies. This is the last straw, Santa.

We haven't ever made any brand of toys exclusively at your workshop.

Did you sell out to the capitalist, huh?

Who is this guy? I think I'm hearing a noise from down below, and it sounds

like... But I don't understand anything he's saying. Any of you get it? Show

some respect. I've been here for centuries.

Then you should know who's in charge of this place, right?

Let's see, who do the kids write letters to, huh? You or me?

Fine, yes, but... Who's the real superstar here, huh? Who's the worldwide

folklore myth? You or me?

Yes, but if you want to... Where are we standing? The annoying dwarf shop, or

are we in a workshop belonging to Santa?

Exactly. Make it happen. Move those butts, guys.

And you drink your milk, Rami, or you'll never grow up.

Something strange is going on around here. We're going to need some

And total wreckage.

Gentlemen, bones right here.

Don't listen to those guys. They're total idiots.

They're barely smart enough not to pee themselves.

Ow. Attention!

We're going to break into pairs for your projects and sites.

No, ma 'am. What are you doing?

Can we be a trio?

Silence! You're animals.

The projects on the northern amphibians will be completed by Ruben and... Oh, I

hope we're together. Please have us together.

You're with the super nerd. Hey, man. Yo, that's not...

I'm probably going to be taking care of those frogs alone.

The project covering reptiles is going to Mia and Lucas.

Oh, right. Hey.

All right. Take it easy, Ruben.

I wanted to work with you, too, but I'll tough it out. Then why do you have that

idiotic grin on your face?

Hmm.

So, your place or mine?

Huh?

This project.

Do you think we should work at your place or mine?

Uh... We can do it at my house. My house.

Okay,

I'm going to give this a shot, okay? I'll come in from your left side, and

going to try to wedge it open right here, and I'll just stick this right

What just happened?

Impossible. Mother of God, I am so hungry.

Well, so am I. I haven't eaten in hours, you know. I'm going to look like a

skeleton. Yeah, right, in your dreams.

Just forget it. All hope is lost.

This Christmas, the bad guys are beating Santa.

Hey, I can put a little hole there so you can breathe. Just because once I had

little hamster and I forgot to put a hole in his cage.

Poor Fernandito Alonso.

Never finished his race.

A little hole?

Why? Now I'm like one of those old abandoned toys. They had their fun, and

I'm just an old piece of garbage in a world where good feelings no longer

matter. Hey, you're not junk. You're old. You're really old, but you're not

junk. Come on, look. Man, you see that Skelectric there?

Where'd I get it? The three wise men? No. Did the Tooth Fairy give it to me?

a chance. My guy Santa gave it to me.

My mother always said I was an idiot.

My father always said I was dumb. My Aunt Peppa said that I was garbage. And

grandma... Okay, I get it, Rafita. I get it.

And somehow, still, you were able to see behind that huge mess there was a huge

heart. I swear there are millions of kids like me who need Santa Claus.

Hey, are you alive in there?

Yes, yes, jeez, come on, it was just a dramatic pause.

You know, it's just that you moved me, you did.

No, no, no, no, no, don't cry, don't cry, don't cry, because...

I know how I'll get you out of there. That's my work, Peter. You never let me

down. Well, actually, you do a lot.

Let's do it. Oh, let's do it. We're gonna make it happen.

Let's make it happen. Our dream is on the way. Just tell your friends to come.

Let's celebrate. Let's make it great. Let's have a good time. Let's do it. Oh,

let's do it. We're gonna make it happen.

Let's make it happen.

Our dream is on the way. So tell your friends to come.

Let's do it now or never. Let's make it last forever.

Let's have a Christmas party tonight.

Surprise, Lucas!

What is all this, Dad? And, geez, what do you have on?

I know exactly what you're thinking. Man, do I have a super cool dad.

You have to do all this today?

But, Dad, don't you think this is overkill? Why do you say that?

Want some candy?

I don't want to offend you, but this is just tacky, Dad.

Well, yeah, it kind of went all out, but I know you're going to love this next

thing.

We're going to write a letter to Santa, father and son, and then put it in the

mail. Yeah, and you'll put me down to nap? Please, Dad, I'm not a child.

But, son, why are you being this way?

After the adventure that we had with Santa?

Oh, man, it's five o 'clock.

Wait, who is it? Whatever happens, not a word. Not the reindeer, not the elves,

and especially not Santa Claus or anything about delivering presents.

Don't talk.

Okay, well, can I breathe? Breathe quiet. Go on. Take this off. Hide. Hide.

Okay, don't push.

Mia,

this is a surprise, huh? We said we were going to meet at five to work, yeah?

Uh, yeah.

It's just surprising that you're so punctual. These days, people are so

Wow, man, you guys love Christmas here, huh? Yeah, sorry, it's just that my dad,

he's a total geek, seriously. Come on, let's go to my room. There's not so many

lights. Cool.

The holidays are finally here, and parents and kids

are having a great time together celebrating.

That's if your son wants to talk to you.

What are you doing here? We have an emergency.

It's Santa. He's been kidnapped and replaced by an imposter.

What? He's there with the elves in the workshop now.

Are you serious?

Fortunately, I got on Rudolph and I escaped by the skin of my teeth. No way.

you kidding? You heard what I said. This is so crazy.

Just one thing. Why is it my issue?

What are you saying?

We've lost Santa. He's gone.

How is that not reason enough?

Yeah, but Lucas has vanished as well, you know?

Lucas has disappeared too? How in the merry... It's a conspiracy. I mean it.

Well, it's just he's gone as we knew him. Now he's a teenager who ignores me.

And if he sees us together, I'm pretty sure he's going to stop talking to me

forever. So go on, get out of here, okay? How can you be so selfish?

Christmas is in danger and Santa might be kidnapped or something even worse,

Salva. And you'd really turn your back on him?

I thought after everything you've been through, you had a good heart now,

I don't believe that. I don't know him at all, okay? I don't know who this is.

Get away from my home, you weirdo. What are you saying, Lucas?

But he knows your name, dude.

A real elf.

Uh, yeah, yeah, yeah. It's way cool.

He's a good friend, aren't he, Rami, buddy?

Well, yes, I thought that we were friends. But your dad doesn't seem to

that we are. I told him that Santa Claus was kidnapped, and he doesn't want to

help me. But Lucas also doesn't want to help, because he's over Christmas. He's

not writing a letter.

Yeah, writing to Santa is totally random, isn't it, bro?

It's whack, actually.

It's so whack, dude.

So Santa Claus has gone missing, and you're not going to help him at all?

Uh... Yes, of course we are. Yeah, um, we should go. Let's find him right away.

You just want to contradict everything I say, don't you? Boys, I'm a fan of this

girl. Well, I'm a fan, too.

Great. Where do we even start? Because he could literally be anywhere.

We interrupt this broadcast to release a statement from the North Pole.

Dearest children, I have, uh, something very important to announce to you.

That's the imposter. After years and years of working without a break,

It's time for me to finally retire, so please stop sending letters.

But don't worry, you'll still get presents this year.

Because at Planet Toys, we work to give children the best toys this holiday

season.

Oh, the hat.

They're passing out. They're so excited.

Planet toys.

And the best part? You don't have to behave or do any of that junk. All that

matters is that your parents just pay, pay, and pay.

With cash, with a car, or bank transfer. But they gotta pay.

Ho, ho, ho.

So if you want to get presents this Christmas, Go to Planet Toys.

Everything is 20 % off and you'll receive no moral judgments.

Isn't that simply amazing? You can act like a total doo -doo head and still get

whatever you want.

With more than 5 ,000 stores all over the planet. What are you waiting for? Go

ahead, kids.

You're already late. Planet Toys. A world of toys.

Well, we know where to start looking for them, right? We should go to that toy

store. Hey, hey, hey.

We could get into some danger. Rami and I should head to Planet Toys. And miss

out on this adventure?

You're tripping. You had just said we don't do anything together.

I think this is the perfect opportunity for some father -son time.

Well, all right, fine. But you have to do each and everything I say. All right,

let's do it! We're gonna save him! We're gonna save Christmas!

We're running out of stock.

Days before Christmas, huh?

An unforgivable lack of foresight.

Not once in 50 years has that ever happened to me. Hey, wait. Dad, we're

restocking this afternoon, and it's all because I'm breaking sales records.

Isn't that great? Aren't you proud? Proud?

Seriously. Maybe if you had started a company of your own from scratch like I

did, huh? But everything you have is because of me.

Why isn't anything I ever do good enough to please you?

Why isn't anything I ever do enough to please you?

You would have been an excellent dramatic actress, you know, sweetie.

Well, I'm heading out. I have to catch a flight to the Alps. See you after the

holidays, okay?

Hello,

Mr. Anselmo.

God, ma 'am, this is such a success. You're going to take Wall Street. Aren't

you ecstatic?

Uh -huh.

These are happy tears.

That's new,

guys.

Look at you champs go.

Hey, guys, look out. Careful.

Heavy load coming through here.

Coming through.

Hey. Hey, guy, where are you going?

Your face isn't ringing any bells.

Yeah, likewise. I'm from the factory headquarters.

This here is the prototype of our grumpy elf, guys.

Man, this guy's ugly.

Yikes. You don't want to talk?

Look at Timothy Chalamet here.

Huh? Yeah, what?

Would you take a look?

I mean, that face is disgusting.

And all those wrinkles, those tired eyes. It's going to scare the kids.

Let's pop it open. Get a better look. No, because it's very delicate. Yeah,

fine. I can do it.

Let's see.

Wow. Wow, they really nailed this. Yeah, and they glued this on right, eh?

Hey, don't you have a sudoku to do?

Does it do anything?

Where's the button to turn it on? Doesn't he have, like, a power button?

Try his belly button. His belly button.

Hey, watch out. It's getting hot.

Looks like it's on now.

Guys, that thing hit me hard.

Okay, I think we've seen enough. Really, don't touch it anymore, okay? You're

going to break it. Fine, fine, but you should know this will never sell.

German, okay.

So you know what the plan is, right? Yeah, go on, hurry up. Let's make it

happen.

Attention to all Planet Toy customers, our store will soon be closing. Please

make your way to the exit and have a great night.

It went great. Let's go.

Sir, sir, the store is closing. Please exit at the front door.

The patience it takes to work here.

Sir!

Over here, Dad.

Sir! Over there. Here we go.

Hop in there.

Fine, then.

Why did you stop breathing?

Because it's really stinky under there.

Look. Oh, Dad, it's a dirty diaper. Matt, no, that's so gross.

Well, hey, Lucas, remember that amusement park? Mia, come on, let's do

In a minute.

The door's there.

Hang on, hang on.

Hey, important.

Now we use the passport, okay?

One little cup here.

Grog, here.

See? I told you that plan was perfect.

Clearly you didn't get groped by a brutish gorilla in a uniform.

That smell. What is it? It's duty. Come on. Here we go.

Come on.

Come on over here. No.

To the right. Here. To the right. Look. Be careful.

Yeah.

Well, there. It's done.

Hey, I bet you're glad now that I took that course in mechanics instead of

useless telecom, right?

You're the best, Rafita.

Hey, listen, do you think this will hold up? Well, yeah, I'm a machine, Santa.

Once I made a go -kart out of a cookie box.

Well, come on, Rafita. Try to start it and let's go, for God's sakes.

Okay, let's do this.

Rafita, you're making me want to throw up.

There's someone else in here.

This is crazy exciting, huh, Mia? I know, right?

Great father -son time, huh? Yeah, yeah. Geez, Dad.

Knock off the chit -chat.

Where should we start investigating?

Well, the boss says Lady Candela Ariarte. We could try to find her

idea. You're as intelligent as your core. As I what?

As you're a great skater.

As you are a great skater.

Ah, somebody's jealous.

Yeah, this is it. This is the top floor. It's ginormous.

As usual, the boss's office is the biggest.

Okay, now don't knock anything over. And Rami, you're always very clumsy. Come

on, let's start looking. You two, check the computer.

Rami, you check those files up top. I'll look at the ones down here.

Really, Salva, this is no time for bad jokes.

That wasn't intentional.

Let's switch it up then.

Oh, and don't forget, make sure you keep it down.

Pat, come on.

My bad.

Whoa, look.

That's him. He's the imposter.

Guy's really got rage, doesn't he?

Whatever, Dad.

This is confirmation that they have Santa Claus.

Come on. Hurry, hide.

Someone's coming.

Wait for me.

Oh, no.

What's all this?

Note to self. Tell Sebastian to fire the cleaning lady immediately.

Well, if she's on a contract, of course.

Christmas is simply phenomenal. They keep spending and I keep on earning.

New sales record broken.

Sorry, ma 'am.

What? I have to tell you something, but please don't get mad.

Go on.

Ma 'am, Santa Claus is missing.

What? Yes, the chest is gone.

But this jeopardizes our entire plan.

I swear to you that we'll find him before anyone notices.

What are you doing here?

Oh, hi.

I'm Manolo, the IT guy. And I haven't heard anything that's happened here

tonight. Sebastian, we're being hacked.

What do you mean, Manolo? The IT guy's Andres Manuel.

Well, sure, I'm Andres Manuel. It's a compound name.

Whose kids are those?

Sebastian, call security.

Yes, of course. No, wait.

Security, to the boss's office.

Sorry, Sebastian.

How many people are in here?

Ma 'am, this is trespassing. They're squatters.

No, we're just a family. Well, maybe we're a little dysfunctional, but we

wanted to run.

Sebastian, go after them.

Sebastian, don't leave me alone.

Come on.

I can't do it. I'll go.

Little doll?

Later!

Rafita? I found Santa Claus. He's in here. They locked him up to wreck

Christmas. Rafita, who let you have a license?

I don't believe this.

Yeah, I totally have him in here.

Get me out of here!

Pathetic.

Yeah.

I'm pretty sure Christmas is in our hands now.

Work tomorrow, okay? Really? Christmas Eve? You have to go to work? Well, yeah.

Rob won't seem to look it, but he's a tyrant. See, I told you that, Guy. Shut

it, you two.

I hope that you don't get seasick because all of you are taking a cruise

factory in Jakarta. Your plan is total insanity.

You won't be able to fool the children.

Yes, children's souls are pure, and they're able to tell the real Santa's

different from the one you've got.

My family has earned a living off of those pure souls for generations.

And I can promise you that they're the stupidest creatures walking this earth.

Bye then.

Oh, and one last thing. Just in case we don't bump into each other. Happy

holidays. Oh, yeah. Happy holidays.

Jeez, man. That lady is devilish. She's mean, man.

It's so funny. Wow. It's incredible.

Another year like this, really? Well, this year, it's not my fault.

Yeah, he's right. This is all Salma's fault. What are you saying? If you'd

helped me with the robbery, I wouldn't have been caught.

It's my fault because I went legit? Yeah, I dare you to tell him that.

The worst part is that we have a lunatic in the North Pole, slave -driving the

elves, and completely controlling Christmas.

No, the worst thing is that we got Lucas and Mia into all of this, and who knows

where they are, the poor thing.

What's good, man?

Lucas! Dad! What's cracking your feet up?

I knew you still loved me, kiddo. Yeah, yeah, but listen, try to keep it down.

And now who is this?

This is my good friend, Lolo.

Lolo Musicolo. Yep. He scared us to death, but it was totally worth it. He

opened up the truck in a second. He opens more doors than a chauffeur, this

Okay, knock it off. We have to get Santa and move our butts out of here as quick

as we can. Thank you, young lady. I don't know who you are, but it seems

you're the only one with intelligence in this group.

Impossible. To open this thing, you'd need the world's greatest locksmith.

Okay, guys, fine. I can open it, but on one condition. I'm taking everything in

there. No, because that's stealing, and now we're all good girls and boys.

Please, Salva, stop messing around.

Let him open this thing, and he can take what he wants.

Ho,

ho, ho!

Not even being kidnapped can stop Santa.

I'm ready to go.

They better get ready, too.

There's gonna be...

Very sorry.

Where is our shipment?

Ma 'am, it must have left by now, but don't worry.

Now, if I may, I'm going to see my mother.

Christmas Eve is our favorite. Just me and her, but she cooks enough to feed an

army. Well, I don't have that problem.

Don't tell me you're eating alone.

Come over and join us. The chicken that my mom makes is amazing, and then the

three of us can play Scrabble.

No. Well, okay, Monopoly.

My God, are you serious?

What's the truck still doing here? And it's open, too.

Well, come on.

Sebastian, say something. Lolo.

These deadbeats.

I'm surrounded by utter deadbeats.

Dork.

We're okay.

Let's all just be cool. This will not take away my victory.

You can't stop. The inevitable.

Cut it out with the stones

already. Just stop, idiot. It's okay. I'm all out of rocks, so...

The real Santa Claus. This is pretty amazing. Yeah, in the flesh, kiddo.

accept imitations.

Like those other guys.

Don't believe this.

We've done this for 300 years without a hitch. And this is going to be the one

where we have to resign.

I didn't do anything. It was you. You couldn't tell the difference between a

actor and the real me.

And yet again, we have to figure out how to be at the North Pole by Christmas

Eve. There's no way we can do that. For the first time in my life, I, uh... I

have to let all the children down.

Why shouldn't I give up, Rudolph?

I don't have anything.

I don't have my sleigh, and I'm working with the grumpiest elf, two teenagers in

their awkward phase, a clown, and Salva, who only this year has decided that he

wanted to be good. So let's get this figured out. Are we going to act like

kids or bad kids? See? I tried to tell you. Who cares?

Oh, that's true.

Rudolph, you're no reindeer. You're the goat. Hey, what is it?

Remember your dad built that souped -up sleigh? Well, we could use that again.

Hey, he's right.

Rafita, where is it?

Rafita. Huh?

Tell me you didn't chuck it.

No, no way. Of course I didn't chuck it. I don't throw anything out.

I sold it.

Well, no big deal. I'm sure whoever you sold it to is a really nice person, and

he'll lend it to us, no problem at all.

Huh? Of course. Of course, man. No problem at all.

If you need to slay for an emergency, you can take it. That's totally good for

us, bro.

Oh, wow. Well, hey, that's great. Thanks a lot. No, you can't, idiot. This is a

business. Why don't you try to make a deal?

That's the way something be heard. Gotta get a pair.

Come on, it's Christmas, and Santa Claus himself needs to borrow it. Hey, no,

don't give me that. I'm retired.

Ramoncini's the boss here, and he's completely heartless. He's like one of

business sharks on Wall Street. Look at this guy. All he needs now is some hair

gel. Now pay us. Well, let's get this clear, Ramon.

No, no, no, he's the man in charge.

Yes, I'm in charge of him.

Okay, Ramoncín, either you lend us the sleigh or I will dine right now. Why,

wait, what? And you're not getting that sandwich you like every day. Huh?

Our greatest work of artist mechanics, Salvador Molina.

You're a true genius.

Bravo, ravita.

Ah, well, thank you.

Okay, all right, all right, all right, okay, okay, okay, enough. You're just

drooling on me now. Uh, yeah, I'll turn it up to go.

Okay.

Hmm. Nope.

Okay.

Oh.

Ma 'am, I think there's something that you should see.

Hello there to all the children. This is the one and only Santa Claus with a

special announcement for you. The man in the ad earlier, he was an imposter.

No. I would never have shared such a terrible message with the world.

That ad you saw, was the work of a company that is heartless and cruel.

Planet Toys, who also kidnapped me in order to try to make a profit. Seems to

that toy company has forgotten the meaning of Christmas.

No, no, no, no, no, no!

So kids, don't forget to send me all of your letters and know that I'm always

here to bring your Christmas wishes to you all. Ho, ho, ho!

This is gonna break the internet.

Hello?

Mauro, you have to shut down the shop and get out because Santa escaped and I

think he's going there.

Hey, I'm not going to run out of here because that imposter has escaped. Do

understand me? What do you think this is?

You're not even really Santa. You're just a failed actor who's more suited to

being a waiter.

Me, a failure? The failure is you. You're a complete disgrace to your

managed to land the role of my life, and I'm not giving it up. For anything or

anyone. Is that clear?

For anyone.

What are you staring at?

Back to work!

We'll try it again, guys. With energy.

I think it's time to get ready for my close -up.

This is the end of it.

My father had it right.

Don't say that.

I'm just a deadbeat, and I'll never be good enough.

No, don't say that. You're better as a boss, smarter, more creative and

efficient, and, well, you're the one I love.

No way it's not.

No way it's not.

I know. It's not right. I'm not good enough.

Shut up and look.

Everyone is returning their toys.

I think we have to get out of here. Yeah, yeah, yeah. We gotta get out of

Rudolph is hitched up and ready to go. Well, let's get going then. There's no

time left to lose. I think you're going to need this.

Rami, you're the best head elf that a Santa Claus could ever dream of. I swear

it.

Oh, wow. What is that?

That's the magic portal.

The elves use it to pass me the presents from the workshop.

And it's starting to open, and that means that time is running out.

How amazing.

Wow, it's full of elves.

Hello?

I gotta see this up close.

I'm going in. What has that little girl done?

We can't leave her alone with that lunatic.

Anything can happen, sir. I'm crucified by the PTA.

Wait for me, Mio.

Salva, you can't do it.

Salva, come on. If an adult could go through that porthole, don't you think

already be over there right now trying to stop that fraud?

Only people with a totally pure heart.

Who are also below a height of five foot tall are allowed to go through the

portal.

Enough with the jokes about the height of the elves. For God's sake, I'm the

who ends up always having to save your butt.

Enough grumbling to the portal.

Watch out!

How rad. It's all of the elves. Hello there.

New friends.

Shh. Not a sound. He's somewhere near.

And be quick. He's really grumpy.

You guys, come with me. We can't let Mauro find us.

He thinks he's grown up, but I'm not leaving my son at the North Pole alone.

And hey, I'm not leaving my friend alone either, got it? I knew that I could

count on you two buddies.

All right, let's see if Rudolph can handle this.

My guy can handle anything. He's a professional. Come on, we've got a

to save, guys. Giddy up!

Well,

I'd say you could pass for elves.

I don't know. I feel kind of ridiculous.

Well, I think you look pretty cute.

Well, we should get to it. You really think this will work out? I added enough

sleeping pills to what he was drinking to be able to knock out at least five

reindeer. And this guy is taking a liking to the elf punch like I've never

Wait just a minute, elves. You guys are missing one last important detail.

Every self -respecting elf simply must have their own set of pointy ears.

And these are the absolute best of the best.

I'd say that I'm the king of the world.

Would you like some more, sir?

Have you guys seen all of these countries?

I mean, do you see the whole world? Well, tonight the entire planet is going

pay attention to me.

Wonderful, sir, but that's why you have to stay hydrated. A little more punch,

eh? Oh, I love it so much. I swear to you, I'd swim and elf punch. Well, have

some, have some.

But I've had so much already, I shouldn't. Yeah, of course you should.

celebrate. It's Christmas Eve. Have some more. Did your voices crack?

You guys are new, right?

Uh, mm.

We have to be stealthy. Come on, let's do this.

What is this nutcase done?

This is amazing.

I always thought Santa's workshop didn't exist. You know, sort of like the White

House. Wow, Rafita, it takes all kinds. That's why you exist. Just focus.

Where are you? You no good imposter. Show yourself.

Show yourself.

Look who's here.

Christmas past.

You're just a big old faker. I don't know how they possibly confused you for

I am vastly more athletic.

Now your reign of terror is over here. Get out of my workshop this instant.

Ha! This is my house now, okay? And I am better at being Santa Claus than you

ever were, you fatso.

Fatso, huh?

Well, it's thanks to me that we live in a better world.

It's thanks to me that we have a better profit margin.

And I'm more cheerful. How's that? I'm more efficient. How's that?

I'm famous for being generous.

So am I. Look at this. I even got a little present for you here.

Do you think that I was so stupid I wouldn't notice?

I'll be honest with you. The punch was delicious, but I'm not so easy to knock

out. Whoa, that guy can take it.

Let us out of here.

I'm sorry, kid, but I'm going to need some kind of assurance.

Let go of my son or I'll destroy you.

Don't move.

Now, I'm crazy, and boy, do I know it. If you try to get near... What?

I don't get it. You said if we try to get near, then what's next? You didn't

finish your sentence.

For heaven's sakes, Rapita. Obviously, he's going to try to hurt the kids.

Is that really what he meant? Seriously?

Yes. Now, this dude is a bad dude. Get out of here.

I'm going to make you eat my dirt.

There can only be one. Yes, and it's me.

Luca!

Mia! No, Luca!

No, no, no, no, no, no.

Hey!

No fatty, not today.

lost this one. You didn't realize I spent three years as a pirate on a

ship acting for tourists. That's fine, but you're forgetting that I am magical.

Yes,

yes, yes, of course, okay, Mr. Santa, but please don't hurt me. Everything was

all that toy store lady's fault. I just wanted to play you. Please, will you

seek forgiveness in your heart?

All right, I forgive you.

Go on, get up, Morrow.

You see that, kids?

Compassion is indeed the most powerful weapon to use.

Watch out!

Do not know it's me, Salma. The real Santa Claus is me, you guys.

Ho, ho, ho!

No, I am the one who is the real Santa. Ho, ho, ho!

This is impossible.

They even laugh the same, you guys.

Just ask them both a question that could only be answered by the real Santa.

Who can tell me what Lucas asked you to bring him?

I can. I know it.

You bust it.

What are you doing, Salma, you idiot?

Man, you just paralyzed my arm with that.

You took the bait, though, man. Lucas didn't write to Santa this year. No,

actually, Dad, I did. I wrote a letter. Are you kidding me, Lucas? Well, it's

just that I still believe in Santa.

Thank you, Lucas. At the very least, I'm grateful I can still trust you. See you

later, loser. Hey, he's getting away.

Hasta la vista, babies. Just watch. I'm going to get some serious revenge.

Well, it's okay.

As voracious as the polar bears are this year, he's not going to last ten

minutes. Come on. Come get us.

Lucas! Mia! Hey, just one second, man. This whole doubles thing has me crazy.

How do I know that's really your dad?

You're like the dumbest person ever. Well, I guess.

There's no time for us to celebrate. It's Christmas Eve, and those toys are

going to be delivered on their own. I just don't think that we could make it

this Christmas.

Yeah, but you're forgetting one thing, which is that we've got two sleighs this

year. Salvador, you're going to save Christmas again.

Ho, ho, ho!

So amazing.

Can I drive it, Santa? Can I drive it? Can I drive it?

Rafita, you behave or you'll have to stay here, okay?

Zalva, do you prefer the southern hemisphere or the northern hemisphere?

I'll take the south. It'll be a lot hotter.

We're out of here. Wish us luck, guys.

Man, I love it when they all start singing.

I kind of prefer a silent one.

All right, guys.

I've never had to deliver presents in such a crazy rush. Well, speed up. No

traffic tickets in the sky.

Or something else, Ravita. Yeah? But you know you're right. More eggs!

We only have four hours left, Dad. It's so stressful. Come on, guys, hurry!

Chill, you don't need to be scared. My dad's an amazing pilot.

Oh, I love their salad dressing. I really only like it on a roof.

Hey, what is that?

Is it a bird? Uh, no, it's a plane.

No, no, no, no, no. It's those two guys.

It's so good. Wait, what?

Coming fast.

You know where the chimneys start, but not where they end. You're a chicken.

You're a chicken.

You're a chicken.

Rafita, the gifts for San Francisco.

Maybe you guys can help me out just a little.

Hey, let's do this, Papito.

Take that thing off. You and I are here to bring stuff, not take it away.

on Christmas without a gift. Wow.

This was such an amazing night, really.

I want to thank you so much, Santa.

Well, I'm glad you enjoyed it. The truth is, I never could have done it without

you guys this year.

Yeah, so, hey, I was kind of thinking about something. I know I'm a big dude

only one of my arms works, but maybe I can be an elf for you.

No, Rafita, no. Okay.

An elf, huh? Why would you want to be that? You're much more important than

now, really.

You're a friend.

Ho, ho, ho. All right, Rudolph.

Go. Giddy up.

Long live Christmas.

Let's go.

Wait, wait. Here we go. Here we go. Whoa.

Well,

Mia, I hope you had a lot of fun and your parents were also very

It's cool. They know that I'm in good company.

Fantastic. Thanks.

Lucas. Well, go on.

Huh? She called you over.

This was the best day of my life. And by the way, you never said who you asked

for in your letter.

Um, well, you know, the usual.

Uh, just a video game and a t -shirt.

You don't have to lie to me. I already heard from Santa, so...

I'm coming.

What a rush.

Wonderful.

You know, I really don't get it.

All night we go around delivering presents everywhere.

And none of us really got any.

Well, we had a lot of time to get them. Yeah, Dad, you're right.

Hey, what's that thing there?

I have a surprise for you guys.

Please, son, really. You didn't have to get me anything at all. Just knowing

that you love me. I mean, for me, everything else is... Oh, jeez, it's

That's so rad, bro. Isn't it cool?

Come on, I'll do the kickoff. All right, come on, kick it.

Come on. Hey, who's the place against my arm?

Hey,

come on. It's your turn.

I'm gonna join you or I'll just get bored Now you're gonna see how it's done

An elf, huh? Why would you want to be that? You're much more important than

now, really.

You're a friend.

Oh, come on now. These are just things that you say. The kid needed the support

of a father figure. And to be honest, who could do it better, you know?

Hey, come on, come on. Please, you guys. You elves know that you're more

important than that. Why, you guys are your family, you know.

That's what you tell everyone.

Great, Rami. You always find a way to kick a man when he's down.

Isn't there something you're forgetting?

Yeah, of course.

Let's all get the party started.

Ho, ho, ho, ho.

Another year I was able to make Christmas a success, huh?

Well, we did.

Ho, ho, ho, ho. Come on now. Do you have to take everything so literally?

Well, yeah. You're always taking all the credit.

Ah, Rami, don't be so grumpy. Just pour me a little bit of that maple liquor.

I'm not your servant.

I ask because you're standing right next to it, man. I know you're not my

servant. Only because you're really old.

Otherwise... Ah, you get grumpier every year, Rami.