Original subtitles

Hello, I'm Aris. I'm from Los Angeles,

California. I'm 40 years old, 5'7, and

I'll be auditioning for the role of

Coach Kevin.

Hi, I'm Harris. I'm 40 years old. I'm 5'

9 in. based in LA.

Uh, back in the day I was in an Old

Spice commercial. Maybe you've seen it.

Um,

Good day. This is Aris. I'm 40 years

old. I'm based in Southern California.

I'm 5' 11 in 6 feet on a good day.

Um, I'm also a Virgo, the youngest of

three siblings.

something I'm passionate about. Being

remembered,

being good or doing good, maybe uh

I want to be one of the greats. What

happened, Bellow? Why you crying again?

I know, vampire, right? I will sure you

die, Edward. I will sure you die. That's

why I'm auditioning for the role of

Coach Kevin.

Good afternoon.

>> Good afternoon, Harris. This is Sid, the

writer and director of the movie. I'm

calling in today just to see if you were

real.

>> What do you mean?

>> I mean, we loved your audition tape.

>> You were so wacky. I just had to call in

to see if you were real.

Oh, right. Yeah. Yeah. Well, here I am.

>> Well, hey, look, we loved your look and

your mannerisms, but there was just one

problem.

>> Huh?

>> Yeah. You forgot to do the rest of the

audition.

>> You told us your name, but then you

start ranking the different seasons of

the Power Rangers. Seriously, who does

that?

That doesn't sound like me. You know

what? I I think I may have gotten the

audition tapes mixed up because, you

know, I I've been applying for so many

roles. I I think I sent you the audition

tape for the Power Rangers movie at

Warner Brothers.

>> Ah, okay. Well,

that makes sense, I guess.

>> So, yeah. How can I, you know, how can I

help you today?

>> If you could just do the audition with

the sides that we provided, that'd be

great. Oh yeah, sure. I I can send that

in. No problem.

>> You know, actually, if you could just do

the audition now while I have you,

that'd be fantastic.

>> Okay. Yeah.

Let me just get into character.

Hello.

Oh my god. I I'm so sorry. I think my

internet is cutting out.

>> This is so embarrassing. I think it'd be

easier if I sent you a video later.

Okay. Okay. Bye.

What up, Oh,

>> dude, leave me alone.

>> How'd the audition take go?

>> Good. Really, really good. Like, really

good. Like better than anything you've

ever done at your job.

>> You sure you want me to get you a job at

the office?

>> Dude, I don't need you to hold my hand

like mom does. Besides, I'm about to

land a big role in a serious movie.

>> No

>> No

Hey, I'm proud of you, man. I know Sib

will be proud of you, too.

Hi, I'm Aeris. I'm 40 years young. I'm

5'7.

I'm the youngest of three siblings.

Fun fact, growing up, my family and I

used to play baseball together a lot.

And uh oh, I almost forgot the last

question. Something I'm passionate

about.

I'm really passionate about film making.

I think being remembered for like a

really long time after you're gone is

really

really amazing.

>> Like it's the best way you can

immortalize yourself.

>> So that's why I'm auditioning for the

role of Coach Kevin.

So, what are we going to do? Huh? We

can't just keep running away from this.

Baseball is our life. I won't back down

from No. No. It's football. Football.

Let's do it again.

So, what are we going to do? Huh? We

can't just keep running away from this.

Football is our life.

I won't back down from this Notre Dame

hottheads.

Now, are you with me or not?

>> Hey, Sid. What's up?

>> Hi, Aris. Uh, just calling in, checking

up on you about the audition. I haven't

heard back in a while.

>> Yeah, I'm doing it. I'm doing it right

now. You actually call me in the middle

of it.

>> Oh, wow. Okay, great. Well, do you have

time? Maybe since we're already here.

>> Time for what?

>> For the audition. I have time now if you

do. We're just really interested in

having you, but we need to decide

tonight.

>> Tonight?

>> Tonight? It's down to you and one other

guy, and the other guy is hungry. So, if

you could do the audition while I have

you, that'd be fantastic.

>> Um,

>> it's not a problem, right? You're an

actor, aren't you?

>> Well, are you or are you not an actor?

>> I am an actor. I am an actor.

>> Oh, you are? Okay, good. That's good.

You know, look, we're really pulling for

you here. This could be your shot at

greatness.

>> I didn't call you at a bad time, did I?

I mean, you're not driving while taking

this call, are you?

>> No. No, not at all. I'm at my home

office.

>> Oh, thank God. No offense, but you

orientals are the worst at driving.

>> Anyway, are you ready?

So, what are we going to do? Huh?

We can't just keep running away from

this. Football is our life.

I won't back down from this Notre Dame

hottheads.

Now, are you with me or not?

>> I think maybe the tone is off. Uh,

do you think you can maybe do it again

with a different tone?

>> A different tone?

>> Yeah, you know, tone. Just try it.

>> Sure, I know tone. Okay,

let's try it with a different town. Why

not?

So, what are we going to do? Huh?

We can't just keep running away from

this. Football is our life.

I won't back down from those not

hottheads.

So, are you with me or not?

>> So, what are we going to do? Huh?

We can't just keep running away from

this. Football is our life. What are we

going to do? I'll tell you what we're

going to do, We're going to

them. Yeah, that's what we're going

to do. We're going to

them up.

Last one. You ready? You're doing great.

Last one, huh?

>> Okay, how about we try a little

improvisation this time?

>> I love it. Let's go. Come on.

>> I can't do this anymore. Don't you get

it?

What if I'm not good enough?

What if I was never good at this to

begin with?

>> Keep going. You told me that this was my

shot at greatness,

that this would make me immortal.

But we're all going to end up in the

same place one day, and all of this will

disappear.

Maybe I don't need the world to remember

me.

Maybe

just remembering her

is enough.

>> ARIS, I have good news.

>> Oh, yeah. What's that?

>> We won the roll. Congratulations.

>> That's cool.

Aris,

what are you doing?

>> I'm going to hang up on you. Then I'm

going to go play baseball with my

brother.

>> What about the role? This is a real

movie. What are you going to go crawl

back to your old Spice commercials?

>> You know what you should do with that

roll? You should take that roll and

shove it up your old racist ass.

Yeah. All up in that ass.

Those Old Spice commercials were good

enough for me.

I now

it's

nothing.