Original subtitles

Frankie, tell the folks at home what you're doing.

What the hell does it look like I'm doing? I'm working out. You're the one

told me to stay in good fucking shape.

Look at these pipes.

Yeah, let's hope your other pipe is bigger than the ones you're bragging

right now.

Well, we're working on these now, and we're going to work on the other one

later.

So, Frankie, I understand you talked to your son, Justin. He gave you a list of

some creative ideas for our new movie here.

Yeah, he suggested that today the kids go ahead and...

Have new moves.

Really, they got new moves? Yeah, we didn't have all that kind of fancy stuff

back in our day.

Why don't you show me this list and tell me what these moves are? You won't

believe the names on these lists.

Well, surprise me. I'm going to surprise you.

The number one move is called the teabag.

What the hell is a teabag? You got me.

Number two, the mushroom stamp.

I like mushrooms, but I don't know if I'm going to like these.

Yeah. And three, we can figure out, it's called the rim job.

Anything to do with basketball?

No, I don't think so, but we're going to slam dunk.

Okay, Frankie, I got myself a paper here, and we're going to make some

Let me see if we can get ourselves another actress here. Sounds good to me.

All right.

Here's one.

Sweet Essence. She's 24 years old.

She's fetish friendly.

Just what you've been looking for, extremely friendly.

Ready for some fun? Call me. All right. I want you to dial this number.

You ready?

Okay.

It's ringing.

Oh, it just came in and said it's disconnected.

All right. Don't worry about it. Hang on. I got another one here. Okay. All

right.

This one sounds perfect.

Beautiful 20 -year -old. Susan is her name. 5 feet, 100 pounds.

Mature men only.

That's good for me.

And you won't be disappointed.

Out calls only, meaning I guess she's coming to us. All right, try this number

out.

Nine. All right, it's ringing.

Okay.

Hello, Susan.

My name is Frankie.

I saw your ad in the paper, and I'm interested. How much are you charging?

Okay, hold on.

It's $200.

See if you're going to poke it out on 150 and turn on the charm to do it.

Hey, sweetie.

You know, I'm...

On a fixed income, okay?

I'm an old guy, you know, in Social Security.

So can you take it down to $150 to help me out? I'd love to see you.

He said only $200.

We'll do it at $200.

Okay, we'll do it at $200.

Let me give you the address.

No, this is just a friend of mine who finances me, okay?

So it'll only be me.

All right, let me give you the address for her.

It's 580. All right, we'll be waiting for this knock on the door. Okay,

she's one away.

Okay, sounds good.

Okay, thank you.

Now, Frankie, remember, take your pill before you get some.

Don't tell me you lost your pill.

Frankie.

Frankie.

You got it? Yeah. Okay.

You had me nervous there for a minute.

I had meat eaters, too.

Okay, there's the pill.

Let's toast to Susan.

All right, to Susan. To Susan.

All right, great.

Let me shut the camera off.

Okay.

I'm getting all excited about this. Oh, good. You're not nervous now, are you?

I am not.

Wait, I hear the door.

Let me go get the door, Frankie. Hold on a minute.

Let me just put the camera down for a second.

okay one

thing

Frankie didn't mention

This encounter here, are you comfortable with that?

Filming for what purpose?

For kind of a private collection.

We're going to show this to Frankie's friends at the old age home just so they

know that he's not dead, he's up in space.

Okay, but it's just for personal use? Just for personal use.

Okay, may I ask for maybe 50 extra since we're filming?

A pretty girl like you, definitely.

You want to negotiate 50 bucks for this. All right, perfect.

All right, great.

All right, why don't you guys have a seat on the couch. Let me get the camera

and we can get going with this, all right?

All right.

Okay, Susan, Frank, are you comfortable there on the couch?

Yes. Okay, good.

You look wonderful, too. Are you guys ready to start the shoot?

I am ready. Are you ready? You know I am.

Yeah, I can see the blood rushing to both your heads from here.

Okay, let's get going. All right. And let's do a little action. My son gave me

some foreplay notes.

Okay. Let me take them out and show them to you.

You know what?

Teabagging.

Oh, my God, yes, I do.

What is teabagging?

Beep, beep, beep, beep, beep, beep.

There you go. Very good.

How's it feeling, Frankie?

It feels kind of tingly.

I know the old folks at the home are going to have a heart attack when they

this. I'm still not quite sure why they call it a tea bag, though.

Me neither, but it's fine with me. They can call it anything they want.

Mushroom stamp.

The rim job.

Hey, Frankie, now that we're done with the pork leg, let's get down to

How about a little French kiss in here?

Set those titties there for me.

Hey Frankie, how about getting a blowjob now?

Susie, you want to take care of Frankie?

Give him a little head?

So fast.

Is the blue pill working good there,

Frankie?

What's it look like?

I'm surprised you're still standing.

Oh, my God, I'm going to come.

Stay, stay.

Stay, okay.

Oh!

Sorry. It's okay.

Sorry.

Oh, God.

She's a winner there, Frankie.

I'm surprised anybody could hold it with a girl that good.