Original subtitles

I've served a lot of masters throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand.

Now your every wish is my command. That's right.

Genie, genie from down under.

Make my wish come true.

Dream on.

Teeny, teeny, from down under.

I wish you'd do what I want you to.

Ah, yeah, all right.

Teeny, from down under.

Dad, we're free!

In days of spring and summer's free and love forevermore.

Though numerous maids have turned my head.

Romance is one of those things that, well... It's a thick, really. It's very

overrated. Only when you're missing out.

Baz, I told you not to sneak around. It's so sneaky.

A love moon boundless with disguise.

Eternal and divine.

Like a disease.

A love like that twixt thee and I.

Dark moon and stars outside.

You enjoyed that, didn't you? Yes.

Now, let me see.

I wish for a boy to be interested in me.

Oh, jealous, are we?

You know I'm not like that, Bruce.

No, I'm wishing for a boy because... You can't get one yourself.

Thank you.

Look, Penn, magic's not the answer in situations like this.

You can talk. Mummy certainly wouldn't be interested in you if you were just

human. I know you use magic on her.

Don't you, Dad?

Of course not. If he was human, there's no way anybody would be interested in

him. He'd be like...

Like you, Penn.

Right.

That's it. This is a wish, Bruce. I wish for you to be human. No magic, no

powers until midnight tonight.

Me too?

No. You can be my genie for a day.

Doesn't feel any different.

Hey, I felt that.

Interesting.

Let's see what Mummy thinks of him now.

Diana. Hey, Penelope.

Is that your new boyfriend?

I wish the earth would swallow them, Baz.

Someone's got to help him.

You're very brave, Bruce.

Oh, really?

For a clown?

What are they?

Goosebumps. Haven't you ever seen them before?

No.

How human.

I must say, I was awfully worried about you, sir.

Well, Sebastian, that's so sweet.

If I can't have romance, they certainly can't. I wish you'd get rid of the boys'

bears.

Looking for Thomas and Sebastian?

Oh, I'm sorry, they've gone. They had other days.

Boys.

They're never around when you need them.

Why can't all boys be like Prince Umberto of Moldovia?

Oh, they're yummy. And so rich.

Of course you realised Prince Umberto and I are having dinner tonight.

Oh, you didn't. Oh.

Who is Prince Umberto? Who is he?

Oh, Baz, he's only the most eligible boy in the whole world.

He's heir to the throne of Moldovia.

doesn't matter. He's perfect for me.

Um, Martha, um, I want to do something for Diana.

You know, something nice.

Why don't you cook her a nice dinner?

Martha, that's, that's brilliant.

That's so human.

So, uh, so what do I cook?

Roast lamb?

I mean, that's just so ordinary.

Marcia, Sophie.

We've told everyone that we're... that you're having dinner with Prince

You should see them. They're all squirming with jealousy.

Yes, I can see.

Please crawl in. I mean, come in.

We'll have to get a photograph to show everybody.

Oh, of course.

Say cheese!

I don't know, can I? I wish he was here right now.

Uh,

hello.

remind you that you have a meeting with a Japanese ambassador in 15 minutes.

Must I, Grigor?

Of course you must, your Highness.

And, uh, following that, you must review the armored regiment.

There's flag -raising ceremony commemorating Moldavian independence.

Not to mention your speech to Parliament, seven minutes free time,

royal dinner party.

It's so quiet here.

Too quiet? We can make it louder.

No. No, I like it.

No bodyguards, no sycophants, no press people snapping endless photographs.

But, Excellency, you're Prince of Moldova, ninth richest principality in

northwest Mediterranean region. It is your duty and privilege, your

responsibility to be our figurehead.

Don't worry your excellentness. We don't like photographers or sycophants around

here either.

Much.

I've got the potatoes, onions, carrots, cauliflower.

That's a lot. Bruce, any reason we didn't just go to the supermarket

out here to this farm?

Is that how you normally do it?

Well, doesn't matter.

Feeling very human.

Even found out the leg of lamb.

I'll work out what to do with the other three legs when we get back home.

Darling. Darling.

Did you know that Master and Sophie are sleeping in the entrance hall?

Really?

What was that?

A cricket?

Penelope, if you've got a boy in your room...

I'm very sorry. It was very inappropriate.

I'll never do it again.

No, that's nothing.

Do I know you from somewhere?

He's Prince Umberto of Moldova.

And he's keeping the ambassador waiting.

Your Highness, really, we've wasted enough time here. You have an image to

maintain.

It's just no fun being a prince.

You mean you're leaving already?

Well, I wish I didn't have to.

So do I.

Your Highness, I'm cancelling all your engagements for the rest of the day.

Are you absolutely certain?

You don't sound like yourself.

No, I don't. In fact, I just might.

Find a whole new career.

There a problem, officer?

No problem. Apart from you speeding, no problem at all.

Oh, what a relief.

I was worried there for a moment.

Worried. What a human thing to do, eh?

Can I see your license, please, sir?

Oh.

Careful, it's very old.

What is this?

It's a letter of authority from the Sultan of Kabbalah to drive a two -horse

chariot between sunup and sundown.

Is this a joke?

Well, it's not good enough.

And is this a family member or your driving instructor, sir?

I mean, you're the sheep.

Welcome

to

the Bunmeister Experience Road Watching Tour.

Sir, where are the birds?

Ah, up in the sky.

Where do you reckon they'd be?

You haven't been doing this story long, have you, eh?

Conrad, come here.

Listen, I want you to do a bit of a reiki.

Check out the place.

Find Monopoly. Will you find her?

I must apologise again for my unprincely behaviour on the bed.

Oh, no, we don't care about that sort of thing.

Beauty, because I do it all the time when you're not here.

It's so different to the palace.

Rules and regulations, always having to be so civilised.

No -one cares here, do they, Pen?

So have some fun.

Baz, I'm glad it was not some Australian pleb like Conrad.

Oh, ladies.

We must apologize for fainting before. I'm sure that happens to you all the

time. Maybe Conrad would like to play, too.

Oh, what a wonderful idea.

That'd be my wish for him to see me now.

He'd be so jealous.

Sorry, I didn't see you. Get off me. I was having too much fun on this thing.

Apparently, you can even drive clothes on it.

Oh, my gosh.

Conrad, why don't you watch where you're going?

I must order one of these for the palace.

Conrad, this is a friend of mine, Umberto.

Delighted.

I don't often get a chance to meet normal people.

Who are you calling normal, pal?

Oh, for me.

Thank you very much.

Unfortunately, I have to give them to charity.

Oh.

Conrad.

He's a prince.

Oh, I know he's a prince.

Umberto.

Roger over and out.

You've got no ID, no passport.

There's no record of your birth, no record of your entry into the country.

The only thing we know about you is you can't drive.

So, um, am I in trouble?

Of course you are.

Humans always get in trouble, aren't they?

It's part of the whole amazing tapestry, isn't it?

What an experience.

These birdwatchers, they're a nice, quiet group, aren't they? I reckon we

get more of them. What do you reckon? Yeah, well, book them yourself, then.

I'm not booking any more tour groups until I get paid.

I'll break it then, darling. It's only a couple of weeks, love.

Otto, you owe me six months' pay.

All right, darling.

I was going to keep this a secret, but since you've forced it out of me,

I respect you, because I'm proud of you, Because I'm a generous little guy,

I'm offering you a half share in the business.

This business?

It's worth nothing.

Less than nothing? An insult.

That's all right. You don't have to thank me.

If you look carefully, I think you'll spot a vulture around here somewhere.

Really? Yeah.

A big fat one.

We have to get a photo of him or else no one's going to believe we have met him.

How can we brag if there's no evidence?

But he hates photographers.

He's a very private and cultured person.

Oh, Conrad, I have warned you about that, haven't I? I have told you

specifically not to think. You know why, don't you?

Oh. There you do it again. You are thinking again.

Well, I'll tell you why. It's because you think.

For instance, what was this alleged thought you were supposed to have had?

I was thinking we'd get a few snaps of him swinging from the clothesline, then

we'd sell him to the papers for a packet.

See? Stupid.

We haven't got a camera.

What are we waiting for?

Come on.

Hi, good morning.

You've no idea what it's like at the palace.

Always on show all the time.

Must be awful.

But you're a prince, Prince Umberto. People want to know where you're going,

you're with.

But everything I do gets reported, filmed, photographed.

Then it gets published in the tabloids.

It's awful.

Will that one happen here, Pen? Will it?

Of course not.

Um, if I'm to be staying for dinner, should not someone be preparing it?

True. I wish it was happening right now.

That's right, Inspector.

Middle Eastern terrorists from the papers.

I managed to capture them all by myself.

Excellent, Constable. I'll have it to fall on MI5, standing by when you bring

it. Um, sorry, sir.

Constable, come in, Constable.

Pleased to meet you.

So human, huh?

Bewildered. That's human too.

I know you are the chef and everything, but I've never done any cooking. Would

it be possible to help?

You can do it all if you like.

I think I need a lie down.

Do you know anything about cooking?

No.

Me neither.

I wish you'd learn quickly.

I'll do the consomme and the pate en croûte.

And I will do the three a la vinaigrette and the crème brûlée.

Excuse us. We understand you've got an indoor royal prestidigit around here.

We're at 12 o 'clock. Ready?

Steady. We should be making custard tarts.

Take your eyes off the birdie.

Fire!

I wish they'd get lost.

Let's all get lost.

That was close.

Hello. We were just wondering if a good horse...

You've

still got to get him photos or nobody will believe us. And if nobody believes

us...

And that includes you.

So get a photo of him.

I wish I was at home so at least I could get paint.

I wish you both were.

Not only are our clothes ruined, but we have not seen a

single bird for the entire trip.

Now look, I know you're upset, but I think this is going to cheer you up

nowhere. This is my specialty. I prepared this for you myself.

Oh, you shall feel very strange sitting at the dinner table with your lady chef.

The chefs insisted.

They wanted to do everything themselves.

Bruce thought it would be... Very human.

Yes.

You know, it's a funny thing.

Pre -dinner chat.

Some people just can't do it.

Really? The reason I came down under, some Aussie chaps and I decided to hold

sort of global think tank, put our heads together, see if we could nut out the

problem. Pre -dinner chat? Yes.

Did you come up with any topics of conversation?

Oh, yes.

That was the best thing about it. I only have to mention the think tank and

everyone becomes incredibly fascinated.

Oh, you can see why.

I never realized you had so many times.

Oh, thank you, but really, it's nothing.

I'm only human after all.

Please.

This is sublime.

I've never had such beautiful coffee.

It's very satisfying serving people, isn't it?

Especially when they're so appreciative.

Can I just say this is one of the happiest moments of my life.

If I was not going to be a king, I think I would be a chef.

Is that a camera?

Is what a camera?

This?

Why, yes, I think it is a camera.

Were you taking photos of me?

Photos of you? With this camera just then?

Um, well... Well, you see, Umberto, Penn knew what a great time you were having,

so she just thought you should have a memento.

Is that true?

I certainly wish it were true.

I mean, well, yeah, of course.

This is for you.

Oh,

you don't know what this means to me.

Being happy with such good friends is so much more important than being famous.

That's what Penny always says.

Yes, I do. Quite often you hear me say that.

Thank you very much.

Would you mind?

You're still up?

It's nearly midnight.

Can't that wait till morning?

Would you leave it till morning?

Well, no, but it's my job.

Yeah, well, I'm just enjoying a human moment.

Bruce, you'll be a very strange human.

Yeah, thank you, Marcy.

Quite a surprise package, aren't you?

A man of hidden talents.

Got any more tricks up your sleeve?

Well... Ouch!

Oh!

You've cut yourself.

Oh, no, you don't. Not when I've got the opal, mister. I wish we were back in

England right now, Baz.

I wish Mummy's finger was better.

Oh, you kicked a baton.

I gave it to Prince Umberto.

Parcel for Penelope Towns. Oh.

Weren't you... Aren't you... I was.

But then, one day, suddenly, I realized what was important to me.

Freedom.

That and a goodbye.

Time here, please.

Mm -hmm.

All proof that we... That you met him.

Not one single photograph.

Oh, I suppose I do wish that... Oh, you wish?

Oh, no, actually.

But what about all our friends?

Are we going to see them?

No. No.

I've realised that Umberto was right. Being happy is more important than being

popular. and some magic moments don't need to be shared with everybody.

Thank you, Ben.

No worries.

I'm the genie. You're the master.

That's right.

I'm the master. You're my genie. You belong to me. Yes.

I've served a lot of masters.

Throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand. Now your every wish is

my command. That's right.

Genie, genie, from down under.

Make my wish come true.

Dream on.

Genie, genie, from down under.

I wish you'd do what I want you to.

Oh, yeah, all right, then.

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