Original subtitles

I've served a lot of masters throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand. Now your every wish is

my command. That's right.

Genie, genie from down under.

Make my wish come true.

Dream on.

Genie, genie from down under.

I wish you'd do what I want you to.

Oh, yeah, all right.

Genie from down under.

the hurdle that brought me down last year.

But this time, I won't let it beat me. This time, I'm going to win the cross

-country. I've been practising for weeks now.

Hail, rain or shine, I've been out here working for victory.

Marcia Huntley won it last year.

I came second.

Of course, I've always been gracious in defeat.

Tried not to be a sore loser.

But this time, I'm going to pummel that Marcia into the ground so she can feel

the pain and humiliation of losing.

I think I'll make a better person.

I don't want to peak too soon.

I just think this style's too plain.

I want to wear something a winner would wear.

That's what this is.

It's what Marcy wore last year.

See, Penny, don't worry about that last one.

It won't be such a problem.

Don't think about it. Just forget about it. You always trip up on the last one.

If you don't think... Thank you, Val.

Oh, but something like this.

Only more fitted here and loose around the thighs.

It is a cross -country race, not a ball. I am a genie, not a fashion designer.

Do you see a ponytail here, do you?

There's got to be something better than this.

Do you know what it's like to spend eternity granting other people's wishes?

Do you know what it's like to be a slave?

To have your only child in chains?

Do you know...

Wire -caged bird things.

If I could fire you without losing the magic.

That looks fantastic.

I wish I had the whole outfit.

It's too big.

Well, she is one of the largest athletes in Europe.

It'll shrink if you wash it a few times. Wow, talk about beautiful.

Oh, thank you, Baz. You really think that...

Marcia.

I expect she's come to throw herself at Conrad again.

It's the third time in four days.

I mean, what does he see in her anyway?

Well, originally I think it was just after her money, but now I think he's

discovered her inner beauty.

Beauty. Oh, don't make me laugh.

Of course. Why am I running? I wish I was in the conservatory.

I can do that.

Diana. Have you a look?

Like that?

Teenage fashions. The baggy look.

It's all the rage.

Yes. Right, that's it. From now on, I don't want you to grant any more wishes.

You mean I'm fired?

Precisely.

What a pathway. Look at the style. No wonder Conrad's after her.

Not after her.

She's chasing him.

Totally, Deb.

He doesn't want to know.

If you were the last girl on the earth, he would... Where are you?

I wish I was there right now. Dressed like that?

No. I wish I was wearing what I was wearing this morning.

And get me there quick before they...

You

said you wanted to get here before they kissed. You said you wanted to wear what

you were wearing.

Personality.

Nice of you to drop by.

Love those PJs. Here, a good look.

Thank you. Oh, Conrad.

Otto's been looking for you. He says it's an emergency.

I'll catch you later.

I noticed you've been practising a lot for the cross -country.

Hail, rain or shine, you're always out there.

No, not really.

It's actually not that important to me.

I do admire you, Penelope.

Such persistence in the face of certain defeat.

Yes, well, winning isn't everything.

I wish you buzz off.

I can do that.

Look, if I'm to bring my tourists here, you're going to have to glam the place

up a lot.

Glam it up? It all needs glamming up.

Now, look, have a look at this.

See this doober?

Now, if you tell the punters that this is the actual spot where King Arthur got

on his bended knee and proposed to Queen Geneve, then suddenly this becomes the

historical highlight of the tour.

But that would be lying.

What? What's up?

Nothing.

Excuse us, love.

What's going on?

You got the pen's good books or what?

Yeah, I'm trying, but you can't do anything. Oh, shut up, my comrade.

Look, we've got to make a move on the opal soon.

I can't keep on charming that old duck forever.

Hello. Hello.

See what I mean?

We are now approaching the historical highlight of the tour.

Ladies and gentlemen, on this very spot, John Burke, the great explorer,

proposed to his wife, Genevieve.

How do you know that?

Crocodile Otto discovered it for himself when he was reading Genevieve's

diaries.

Gosh, Marcia, you might have trouble winning the cross -country now.

If there's one thing I can't stand, it's cruelty to people in small jars. Come

on, you've had your fun. Set it free. Oh, look, she's joining her four front

legs begging. This is that cute. Oh, darling, there you are.

This is 30 yards from the grave.

Marcia's gone missing.

Don't worry, Penelope, I've got connections. I know all the low people

places.

What's that?

What? That.

Just a jar. You think we've got a bee there? I'm not interested in bees, miss.

I'm interested in missing persons. And something tells me that this wet band

belongs to Miss Marcia Huntley.

So, you still say she left by ten in a taxi with Conrad

eloping to the south of France.

Why...

Taxi company have no record of a call.

Um, computer meltdown?

Does Marcia have any enemy?

Apart from Miss Penelope. Now, wait a minute.

Miss Penelope may have hated and despised Marcia, but... Thank you,

So, you admit you hated her. How much longer must you go on torturing this

innocent child? Isn't it obvious that she couldn't harm an insect?

something. It's written all over your face.

This blasted bee.

Oh, no.

You killed her.

You can tell the sex of bees.

It's still alive.

Here. Hold on. I couldn't think of the guilt. I confess. I wished

Matthew... But she drove me to it. I'm not a killer.

If only I could go back in time.

Oh, I wish I'd never wished it.

False alarm.

Sorry to disturb you.

It's all very nice of you, Inspector, but how are these poor people supposed

pick up the shattered pieces of their lives?

Hello?

Look, you've got to stop wasting your time with that Marsha. She hasn't got an

opal. You've got to move in on Monopoly. She won't fall for it. Besides, I don't

even like it. What's the like of the deal with it?

I've had five wives. I haven't liked any one of them.

Now, look, it's all about romantic technique.

Now, I'm your expert.

Look into my eyes and pretend I'm Monopoly.

Won't work.

Sit down.

Don't lie. You enjoyed it. The pyjamas, the bee, the inspector.

You think you're so smart, but I'll show you.

Conrad, this will be a laughing stock.

Conrad. If only he wasn't after the opal.

Look, it's all about eye contact, Conrad. Now look lovingly into my eyes.

on, Conrad, concentrate.

Oh, the opal.

I know.

I wish I could trust Conrad.

I wish he was honourable, principled, and totally besotted with me.

I can do that. No, no, no.

This is a job for your father.

heart and soul.

That's it!

You got it! I think you're ready. Time to get that eyeball.

This will be our last thought before we conclude our 10 -day special Bob Meister

Outback Experience.

Consumer Affairs Undercover Investigator.

Sarah Jones Fuller -Sport.

Sure, we don't complain.

But we couldn't believe it until we actually experienced it. The von Meister

experience for ourselves.

You can't make it easier for yourself. It's not really you we want. It's von

Meister. That's right.

He's your boss and you feel loyalty to him. So we don't expect you to tell us

where he is. Town Hall, Wiltshire, England.

His phone number.

It's not precious.

Liar. I have no longer the man left stranded at the altar.

I know for many people that's sort of, well, how can I describe it?

Rejection would be relatively traumatic.

But I've spent the weekend in the forest with my chaps who wish to redefine

their masculinity support group. And I've managed to turn that rejection into

something more positive. My masculine brothers and I are working on bringing

the more feminine side of my incredibly male psyche.

If all this came out in one weekend, imagine how far you'd progress if you

into the forest for six months.

Oh, yes.

The point I'm trying to make, Diana, is that I feel I'm much more important than

you.

Hi, Tyrone. How do you do?

Pen,

I've got to tell you something.

Have you? Something probably comes to shock you, like a bolt out of the blue,

and suddenly I need it. You're the love of my life, my soulmate, my destiny.

I never want to leave your side.

Inspector Green from the yard again.

I'm looking for one von Meister, also known as Crocodile Otto.

He's wanted for extradition back to Australia to face criminal charges.

Whatever my uncle's done, I'll stand by his side.

Mr Meister's outside.

He's a fat repulsive oaf. You can't miss him.

Oh, Westy, boy, but if you run, you're going to look guilty.

I am guilty.

Well, a little bit guilty.

Here you are. That's the truth.

Here,

this is a great hole. And the scissors.

Here, you come back here.

Marcia look good or what? She's got everything going for her, Dad.

She makes Penelope look so boring.

Oh, fair go, mate.

Looking good, girls.

And she's doing all right.

I wish she looked more sensational than Marcia.

No worries.

Take it away, son.

Making me fly like a bird wouldn't look natural.

Yeah, but it'd look pretty sensational.

I've had it with you two, twisting every wish I make.

You're irresponsible.

You're a disgrace.

You're fired.

Mate, I don't know what to say, but if you've made your mind up... Yay, Dad,

got a second!

Little ragamuffin.

So that's your game.

Drive me crazy so I'll sack you. Well, I'm way ahead of you. I shan't be making

any more wishes.

I do wish for you to work for me manually till you learn to behave.

No more wishes.

What about the cross -country?

I can wait on my own words if I absolutely have to.

I don't need you.

Good work, Mum.

I'm sorry, Dad. I got excited.

It's not every day that Dad gets sick.

Otto, you've got to give yourself up. You can't let them slander the

experience like that.

We've got to go home and clear our good name.

Why? We haven't got a good name. Oh, come on. Where's your honour? Where are

your principles?

Well, is that some sort of trick question? What is your problem?

Name it chap.

I can't shout it chap.

A -B -H -A -P.

That's how it sounds.

Go home and play some music like this.

Uh, not really.

There are more places to hide at, Astraya.

Hey.

Thank you for your cooperation, Bob.

Till next we meet.

Adieu.

I have to go back and help what I find. It's a bad person standing in the

corridor.

I just take it for the moment. For the cross -country.

I can't, Pen, because I love you and our future depends on you saving the family

business. Oh, please, don't. Gosh, I cannot be worthy of you as a feminist

Oh, Conrad, sometimes I wish you were.

Come on, Conrad, we're leaving. Get a move on.

Always love you, Pen.

Really, darling, I thought you were happy with your tracksuit. But I didn't

bean green.

Just green green.

Well, if I were you, Miss Penelope, I'd be more worried about that last hurdle

than what you're wearing.

Hello, Penelope.

Love the tracksuit. Is that bean green?

Yes. It's nice.

I just think I'd prefer the green green than the twice green.

Good luck with the last hurdle. If I were you, I'd try not to think about it.

Thank you, Marcia.

Marcia's right.

I'm not thinking about that last hurdle. If you don't think about it... Yes, and

thank you, Baz.

I'll have you know that I'm not worried about the last hurdle. I don't think

about it. It's not an issue. All right!

Sure. I think he's a bit tense, then. I am not tense!

There it is.

Big hurdle.

It's all right, Baz. I'm not thinking about it.

Just remember to run your own race.

Don't panic.

Even if you're losing, don't panic.

It's not where you start that matters.

It's where you finish.

Now, the race hasn't started yet, so you can still win it.

Thank you, Bruce.

Now, you sure you don't want to make a wish or two, make it easier on yourself?

No, I've learned my lesson. I shan't be making any more wishes for a long, long

time.

And you'll be doing manual labour for an even longer time.

Looks like we won't be going back to Australia for a while, hey, Dad?

Good luck, Pen.

Yeah, good luck, Pen. Yeah, break a leg, kiddo.

You wish.

Here's mud in your eye.

Too bad there can only be one winner.

Come on, Marcia, you can do it. On your mark.

Go for it, Penelope. Go for it.

Get set.

Look, Pat, will you please...

came from behind the way she ran her own race.

That's right. I'm the master. You're my genie. You belong to me. Yes.

I've served a lot of masters throughout history.

Now I want to go back home where I can be free.

Then you come along with the opal in your hand.

Now your every wish is my command. That's right.

Genie, genie, from down...

I wish come true.

Dream on.

Genie, genie, fall down under.

I wish you'd do what I want you to.

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