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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:04,659 --> 00:00:06,360 Hey, why are you slamming the door? 2 00:00:07,140 --> 00:00:08,860 I fucking hate my life, Mom. 3 00:00:09,240 --> 00:00:10,360 Hey, what's wrong? 4 00:00:11,220 --> 00:00:12,640 I don't want to talk about it. 5 00:00:12,880 --> 00:00:16,760 Can I just relax and not talk about it? 6 00:00:18,340 --> 00:00:22,060 Wasn't today the day that you went on your date with that one girl? Oh, yeah, 7 00:00:22,260 --> 00:00:24,500 yes, yes. That did happen. 8 00:00:24,920 --> 00:00:27,480 That one girl, that one girl, yeah. 9 00:00:28,360 --> 00:00:31,020 I have decided I'm giving up on dating. 10 00:00:32,000 --> 00:00:33,000 Permanently. 11 00:00:33,280 --> 00:00:34,280 I'm done. 12 00:00:34,320 --> 00:00:35,520 I'm going to shave my head. 13 00:00:35,900 --> 00:00:37,220 I'm going to join a fucking monastery. 14 00:00:38,320 --> 00:00:39,840 I'm going to be a vegan. 15 00:00:40,120 --> 00:00:42,900 I'm going to change my life. I'm going to give it over to Buddha or whatever. 16 00:00:43,820 --> 00:00:46,760 God will keep me from going through what I just went through today. 17 00:00:46,980 --> 00:00:47,980 That's ridiculous. 18 00:00:48,560 --> 00:00:52,400 I don't think it is, Mom. What happened? Did you just have a bad experience? Big 19 00:00:52,400 --> 00:00:53,720 deal. I mean, you're young. 20 00:00:54,200 --> 00:00:55,200 It's going to happen. 21 00:00:55,300 --> 00:00:56,300 Yeah, totally. 22 00:00:56,360 --> 00:01:01,520 You know, it's going to happen. I can understand having a few bad dates, but 23 00:01:01,520 --> 00:01:06,820 this one sort of takes the cake. And I'm in a lot of pain emotionally and now 24 00:01:06,820 --> 00:01:07,820 physically, too. 25 00:01:07,900 --> 00:01:09,220 I'm done. I quit. 26 00:01:09,780 --> 00:01:11,060 Women are insane. 27 00:01:11,340 --> 00:01:13,580 Yeah, but I mean, girls, they're going to break your heart every day. 28 00:01:13,840 --> 00:01:17,500 But are they going to break my dick every day? She bit my penis, Mom. 29 00:01:18,040 --> 00:01:20,480 She bit it. She bit your dick? 30 00:01:20,700 --> 00:01:21,700 Yes, she bit my dick. 31 00:01:23,360 --> 00:01:27,910 Like... Was she trying to give you a blowjob and she accidentally bit it? At 32 00:01:27,910 --> 00:01:31,190 this point, I don't know what she was trying to do. I thought that when the 33 00:01:31,190 --> 00:01:34,390 penis goes in the mouth, there's going to be a little bit of sucking and stuff 34 00:01:34,390 --> 00:01:38,570 and maybe some nice things. She bit it straight up. Just bit my dick. Maybe she 35 00:01:38,570 --> 00:01:41,530 put it in at an angle and it bit your teeth or something. 36 00:01:41,950 --> 00:01:45,430 I can't imagine someone just biting your dick, honey. See, neither can I. 37 00:01:46,330 --> 00:01:51,450 I'm done with dating sites. I'm done with trying to meet people. I'm never 38 00:01:51,450 --> 00:01:52,450 to have sex again. 39 00:01:52,869 --> 00:01:55,410 Because you're afraid that girls are going to bite your dick. 40 00:01:56,930 --> 00:02:00,390 I'm afraid that the next one might just bite it clean off. 41 00:02:00,610 --> 00:02:02,010 And it just, it hurts. 42 00:02:02,770 --> 00:02:08,190 It hurts. Well, sometimes, honey, girls that are not so experienced, they, you 43 00:02:08,190 --> 00:02:11,370 know, it helps the back of their mouth and will hit their teeth and stuff like 44 00:02:11,370 --> 00:02:13,510 that. Are you sure it wasn't an accident? 45 00:02:13,830 --> 00:02:14,910 It was not an accident, Mom. 46 00:02:15,650 --> 00:02:19,270 No, no, no. Running into the end of the street, getting hit by a car, chasing a 47 00:02:19,270 --> 00:02:20,270 ball was an accident. 48 00:02:21,780 --> 00:02:23,540 deliberately biting a person's dick. 49 00:02:23,760 --> 00:02:25,600 No, I can't forgive that. 50 00:02:25,820 --> 00:02:30,460 I don't know if you've actually had a good blowjob in hunting, because girls, 51 00:02:30,620 --> 00:02:33,200 they usually don't bite guys' dicks. 52 00:02:34,080 --> 00:02:35,540 That's sort of what I've been reading online. 53 00:02:36,620 --> 00:02:37,620 Okay, 54 00:02:38,420 --> 00:02:41,400 why don't, here, take off your shorts. 55 00:02:41,780 --> 00:02:44,780 I'm going to help you. I'm going to show you what a good blowjob is, because I 56 00:02:44,780 --> 00:02:47,640 don't want this to ruin your experience with women in the future. 57 00:02:48,060 --> 00:02:51,300 I don't want you thinking every woman's going to bite your dick when they give 58 00:02:51,300 --> 00:02:52,460 you a blowjob. Are you kidding? 59 00:02:52,880 --> 00:02:54,060 No, I mean, come on. 60 00:02:55,420 --> 00:02:56,540 Mom, that's weird. 61 00:02:56,740 --> 00:03:01,440 I can't do that. Yeah, but otherwise, you're not going to go on any dates, and 62 00:03:01,440 --> 00:03:04,980 you're going to be scared that people are going to bite you down there. Are 63 00:03:04,980 --> 00:03:07,200 telling me you don't want me to live with you for the rest of my life? 64 00:03:07,880 --> 00:03:09,560 Honey. Are you trying to get rid of me? 65 00:03:09,960 --> 00:03:10,960 So ridiculous. 66 00:03:11,200 --> 00:03:14,140 Just take it off. Pull on your shorts. Take it off. Come on. 67 00:03:23,480 --> 00:03:26,560 Good. I don't feel very comfortable right now, Mom. Come on, honey. 68 00:03:27,480 --> 00:03:30,580 Don't cover up. It's fine. I promise you. It doesn't feel fine. 69 00:03:31,140 --> 00:03:34,820 I know this is a little bit weird, but I don't want... I honestly don't want 70 00:03:34,820 --> 00:03:38,960 your experience with women to be weird. You know? So let me just take care of 71 00:03:38,960 --> 00:03:42,680 it. I'll show you that some girls can actually give good blowjobs. 72 00:03:42,960 --> 00:03:47,780 Are you serious right now? Yeah, of course. Honey, not everyone's going to 73 00:03:47,780 --> 00:03:50,320 bite your dick for no reason or accidentally... 74 00:03:50,750 --> 00:03:51,910 Brush it up against their teeth. 75 00:03:52,470 --> 00:03:55,710 Okay? It feels good. It's something that's supposed to feel good. 76 00:03:56,410 --> 00:04:00,670 That's really what I heard. All my friends say that blowjobs are like the 77 00:04:00,670 --> 00:04:04,350 thing in the whole world. And I just had nothing but bad luck. 78 00:04:04,990 --> 00:04:09,430 Okay, honey. Just try to relax. And I promise you this is going to feel really 79 00:04:09,430 --> 00:04:10,430 good. 80 00:04:10,490 --> 00:04:11,690 Okay. Okay? 81 00:04:14,510 --> 00:04:15,510 Oh. 82 00:04:16,690 --> 00:04:18,390 Oh, it already feels better than... 83 00:04:18,920 --> 00:04:19,920 what I've been through. 84 00:04:28,140 --> 00:04:29,140 Yeah, 85 00:04:30,500 --> 00:04:31,500 that's way better. 86 00:04:32,460 --> 00:04:33,820 Not biting at all. 87 00:04:51,820 --> 00:04:57,960 Oh, God, yeah, that is so much better than she... Oh, Mom. 88 00:04:58,780 --> 00:05:01,100 Oh, God, is it really supposed to feel that good? 89 00:05:01,800 --> 00:05:02,960 Oh, God. 90 00:05:03,900 --> 00:05:06,960 See, honey, no teeth. It feels really, really good. 91 00:05:07,240 --> 00:05:08,240 Yeah, it does. 92 00:05:08,980 --> 00:05:10,060 Oh, shit. 93 00:05:11,480 --> 00:05:12,480 Ooh. 94 00:05:20,590 --> 00:05:23,230 I don't think I'm ready to give up on women yet now. 95 00:05:24,450 --> 00:05:25,450 Oh. 96 00:05:27,170 --> 00:05:28,170 Oh, 97 00:05:29,230 --> 00:05:33,450 yes. You know what else feels really good? 98 00:05:33,670 --> 00:05:35,290 What? Oh, my God. 99 00:05:36,810 --> 00:05:37,810 Oh, yeah. 100 00:05:40,150 --> 00:05:41,150 Oh. 101 00:05:43,150 --> 00:05:44,770 Oh. Oh. 102 00:05:46,050 --> 00:05:47,050 Oh. 103 00:06:20,200 --> 00:06:24,140 Oh Fuck mom really 104 00:06:25,310 --> 00:06:26,410 Yeah, it does. 105 00:06:26,890 --> 00:06:28,270 Oh, God. 106 00:07:06,090 --> 00:07:07,770 It's okay, you can't touch mommy's head. 107 00:07:14,730 --> 00:07:19,450 Sometimes it feels better if you, you know, push your head. 108 00:07:55,720 --> 00:07:57,640 Have you had any more experience than just this? 109 00:07:57,880 --> 00:08:01,320 No. Have you ever had sex before or anything? Not really, Mom. 110 00:08:01,720 --> 00:08:04,960 Do you want to try that? Are you serious? 111 00:08:05,220 --> 00:08:07,760 Yeah, so that you have a good experience. I would love that. 112 00:08:08,040 --> 00:08:09,040 Okay, honey. 113 00:08:13,320 --> 00:08:15,460 Don't be nervous. Just slide it in. 114 00:08:28,140 --> 00:08:29,420 You got to be nice and slow. 115 00:08:29,740 --> 00:08:30,740 Oh. 116 00:08:31,280 --> 00:08:32,539 Oh, God. 117 00:08:33,340 --> 00:08:34,919 I can't believe this is happening. 118 00:08:35,260 --> 00:08:36,260 It's okay, honey. 119 00:08:37,860 --> 00:08:39,280 There you go. 120 00:08:39,640 --> 00:08:41,900 It feels really good for me. 121 00:08:43,039 --> 00:08:44,320 Really? Mm -hmm. 122 00:08:44,880 --> 00:08:45,880 Oh, 123 00:08:46,800 --> 00:08:48,380 can I see your tissue? 124 00:08:48,680 --> 00:08:50,180 Hi. Oh. 125 00:08:51,240 --> 00:08:52,240 Ooh. 126 00:09:01,960 --> 00:09:02,960 Good night, Dave. 127 00:09:43,910 --> 00:09:44,910 any more dates. 128 00:10:52,110 --> 00:10:53,110 I'm easy 129 00:12:18,090 --> 00:12:19,790 and watching porn that had doggies smiling. 130 00:13:57,130 --> 00:13:58,130 I can take much more. 131 00:13:58,350 --> 00:13:59,430 I don't have to come. 132 00:13:59,770 --> 00:14:02,610 I want you to feel good, okay? Okay. I want you to feel good. 133 00:14:02,870 --> 00:14:03,950 Oh. Oh. 134 00:14:06,970 --> 00:14:07,970 Okay. 135 00:14:08,370 --> 00:14:09,370 Oh. 136 00:14:10,010 --> 00:14:11,470 Oh. Oh, yes. 137 00:14:11,790 --> 00:14:12,950 Oh, God, Mom. 138 00:14:13,290 --> 00:14:14,290 Oh. 139 00:14:14,490 --> 00:14:15,490 Oh. 140 00:14:15,910 --> 00:14:17,650 Oh, God. 141 00:14:18,290 --> 00:14:19,330 It's so good. 142 00:14:19,710 --> 00:14:22,210 It's so much better than I thought it would be. 143 00:14:22,570 --> 00:14:24,350 Oh. Oh, fuck. 144 00:14:24,670 --> 00:14:26,430 Yes. Oh, yes. 145 00:14:26,860 --> 00:14:29,000 Oh my god. Oh my god. 146 00:14:29,600 --> 00:14:30,600 Oh my god. 147 00:14:30,640 --> 00:14:31,640 Oh. 148 00:14:31,800 --> 00:14:33,320 Oh god. 149 00:14:33,600 --> 00:14:35,800 Oh. Oh. 150 00:14:36,560 --> 00:14:37,560 Oh. 151 00:14:38,780 --> 00:14:39,780 Oh. 152 00:14:41,340 --> 00:14:42,800 Oh god man. 153 00:14:43,100 --> 00:14:45,360 Oh god it's everywhere. 154 00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:46,839 Oh. 155 00:14:46,840 --> 00:14:48,480 Looks so good. 156 00:14:48,960 --> 00:14:52,760 Oh thank you. Thank you so much. 157 00:14:59,120 --> 00:15:03,360 what it doesn't even matter mom because if i have another bad date i know who 158 00:15:03,360 --> 00:15:07,700 i'm coming home to yeah honey i'll take care of you thank you mom i love you 159 00:15:07,700 --> 00:15:08,800 sweetie i love you 11076

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