All language subtitles for Laramie S04E14 Vengeance

We'll never track him
in those rocks. Break
a horse's leg like a toothpick.

Now is no time
to quit, Mort.

No, Morgan knows
this hill country.

He could have us sighted
in right this very minute.

There's one way
to find out.

I'll not have a good man
killed to get a bad one.

Griff Dome
was a friend of mine

and his killer's
not getting away this easy.

All right.
Let's cover him
as best we can.

[ gunshot ]

Are you satisfied now?

That's not the word
for it.

I'd better get you
to the doc.

It's not that bad,
Mort.

Now see here, Slim.

I'm responsible for this posse
and I'm running it.

I told you
not to climb that bluff,

but you had to
go ahead anyhow.

Well, I'm telling you now,
you're gonna see the doc

and that's it.

Well, I guess I'm not
in any kind of shape to argue.

No, you sure aren't.
You're just lucky you lit
on that hard head of yours,

or you'd have broken
every bone you got.

Somebody'll get
Morgan sooner or later.

Well,
that you can count on.

Give me a hand.

Thanks, Daisy.

I finally found out how to
get some service around here.

Yeah, well,
just don't get used to it.

Go on, Mort.

Well, after Slim
took his fall,

we had no choice but to give up
on Morgan for the night.

Did anybody see
Morgan kill Griff?

No.

They had an argument
over a poker game.

I broke it up
before anybody got hurt,

but Morgan
made a threat to kill Griff

in front of
half of the town.

And Morgan knew that
Griff was carrying that money

from the cattle sale.

Somebody should have
locked him up a long time ago.

I know that, Jess,
but he's pretty smart.

He's made friends with
every barfly and drifter
that ever hit town.

Buys 'em drinks,
feeds 'em,

then they cover for him
any time he needs it.

I'll get him
one of these days.

Poor Mrs. Dome,

left with two children.

I must go over there.

Has she been told, Mort?

One of Griff's riders
is with the posse.

He won the job.

You mean Joey Dome's
father is dead?

Yeah, tiger, he is.

We'll go over there,
Mike,

as soon
as we get Slim to bed.

I'm all right, Daisy.

It's just fine.

But the doctor did say bed,
didn't he, Mort?

Yep, at least a week of it.

A broken collarbone
has got to be cared for.

Well, you heard him, pard.

It sure beats all
what a man will do
to get out of a little work.

Well, I'll trade places
with you with pleasure.

Well, I reckon
if I'm gonna be doing it all,

I better get to work
on the north fence.

We're still losing
stock up there.

I'll be back by noon.

Keep your eyes open,
Jess.

That's where we lost
Morgan last night.

I'll do that.

I'm taking you in,
Morgan.

Throw down your guns.

Nobody is taking me in,

not for something
I didn't do.

Then you got
nothing to worry about.

I'll guarantee you a safe
trip to Sheriff Cory.

He'll give you
fair treatment.

But it ain't going
to do you any good

if I have to put a slug
in you to take you back.

All right, don't shoot.

It's a deal.

All right,
throw that rifle down.

Take your gun belt off.

Anything you say.

I didn't kill Dome,
Harper.

- I swear.
- Yeah?

Why'd you open up
on me like that?

I suppose you're gonna tell me
that this isn't Griff's money.

I didn't kill him.
Nobody'd believe me.

I couldn't let you
take me in.

I didn't kill him.
It was--

What's the trouble,
Jess?

You were right, Mort.

Somebody did catch up
with Joe Morgan.

Gunfight?

I gave him a chance
to come in peaceful.

He decided
not to take it.

What did Joe Morgan
ever do to you, Harper?

Ain't you got the guts
to face a man?

Looks to me
he was shot in the back.

Joe Morgan
was our friend.

If it's the way
it looks,

you had no call
to back shoot him.

I was lucky to shoot him
any way I could.

He missed me
by an inch,

and then took for cover
still firing.

That's when
I dropped him.

Yeah.
That's your story.

You calling me a liar?

Hold it, Jess.

Now all of you move off.
I'll handle this.

Sure, you'll handle it,
sheriff.

A friend of yours shoots
an innocent man in the back.

Harper gets off
free and easy,

that's how
you'll handle it.

You think
Morgan is innocent?

Well, I took this off him

and I'll stake my life
it's Griff Dome's cattle money.

You figure that's reason
enough to shoot him
in the back, is that it?

I figure Morgan
had to kill Griff to get this.

I just wanted to
bring him in, that's all.

All right, take it easy.
You want to claim the body?

We might as well.
But there's gonna be
some others

mighty interested
in this thing.

All right. Take it on down
to the undertakers.

Now the rest of you,
go on about your business.

Come on, Jess.

Now wait a minute,
Mort.

I want to know
what's going on around here.

I'll tell you inside.
Now come on.

Rake him good,
sheriff.

Folks don't take
to back shooters.

Jess! Hold it, Jess.
Now come on.

Joe.
Oh, Joe.

What's going on
around here anyway, Mort?

This whole town
gone loco?

Last night you had a posse
out after Joe Morgan.

Today I shoot it out
with him,

kill him to keep
breathing myself,

find Griff's money
on him.

Everybody acts like
I've done something awful.

I got a feeling
that includes you too.

Got it all out now?

I mean, so you can
just listen to me?

I'm sorry, Mort.

I'm listening.

It's not
the whole town, Jess.

Mostly the no-good
friends of Morgan's.

I don't care who says it.
I don't like being
called a back shooter.

I know, Jess.
And anyone else close
to you can be pretty sure

that you were
forced into it.

The trouble is...

Morgan didn't kill
Griff Dome.

Say that again, Mort.

When I got back to town
this morning

after taking Slim
out to the ranch,

some of the boys
had picked up a drifter.

They found some of Griff's
personal property on him.

His watch,
hunting knife and his gun.

Then this fella
was in on it with Morgan.

No, that's not
the way it adds up.

You mean that ain't
Griff's cattle money?

Oh, I'm pretty sure
that it is.

The drifter found Griff after
Morgan had stolen the money.

He'd only knocked
him out to get it.

And when Griff
started coming to,

the fellow got scared
and shot him

with his own gun
and ran off.

He confessed
the whole thing.

Then Morgan
only robbed Griff.

That's right.

And those folks outside think
you killed an innocent man.

And the way they see it,

you ambushed him.

WOMAN: Harper?

Jess Harper?

You come out here.

Hold on, Jess.

I don't care
what you say, sheriff.

He killed my man.
He's going to pay for it.

Like I said, miss, I sure
don't want to use this,

but you're giving me
no choice.

Hold it, Mort.

You plan on going
through with this

without hearing
my side of it?

What's there to hear?

I'm not blind.

I saw Joe with your bullets
still in him

where you shot him
in the back.

Wait a minute.

Might not hurt to think
this thing over.

He's gonna get his
soon enough.

Stay out of this, Deevy,
it's none of your business.

All right, sheriff.

It's good enough for me
if you say so.

I'll take that.

I think you'd better
come inside, miss.

Well, wait a minute,
sheriff. What for?

She's not gonna give
any more trouble, are you?

Why should I bother
with the likes of him?

Some things you need to
get straight, young lady.

Now inside.

You two dream up
a pretty good story?

Nobody in here
is making up anything.

But you've been listening
to a pack of lies outside.

There's one thing out there
that puts a lie to anything

you have to say,
back shooter.

Now you listen
and you listen good

because I'm gonna tell you or
anybody else for the last time.

Joe Morgan emptied a rifle
and half a six-gun at me

before I stopped him.

And if you don't believe it,
you can check his irons.

Sure, I can.

After you fired it,
made it look like Joe did it.

What is he, sheriff?
Is he your deputy?

I mean, what is it
that gives a man

a right to shoot somebody
for something they didn't do?

Does that make you feel good
to kill an innocent man?

I took this off of him.
You call that innocent?

What's wrong with Joe
carrying money?

Is there a law
against that?

It's about the same amount
that Griff Dome was carrying
from a cattle sale.

That don't prove
nothing.

Look, ma'am,

if Morgan had have come back
to Laramie without a fight,

he could have
cleared himself.

But he must have
had a reason

to start shooting at me.

I'm sorry I was the one
that had to be there,

but that's the way
it was.

You're gonna be sorrier,
Mr. Harper.

Before long, you're gonna be
the sorriest man in Laramie.

I think
you'd better explain

what you're driving at,
young lady.

Maybe
I don't want to.

Maybe? You're not
leaving here
till you do.

Did it have
anything to do

with what Deevy was
whispering to you out front?

You keep company with Deevy
and the no-goods

he travels with,
you're gonna find yourself
in a lot of trouble.

Oh, now you're criticizing
the company I keep, huh?

Every one of that bunch
is as worthless

as a four-card
flush.

Well, it's very kind
of both of you gentlemen

to try to keep a girl
off the primrose.

But it just so happens

that not many of
the respectable men in this town

want to have
anything to do with me.

What's my name,
sheriff?

And I don't recall receiving
any invitations from you,

Mr. Harper,
to have supper

out at that farm
of yours either.

If it makes you feel any
better to talk that way, miss,

go right ahead.

But I still want to know
what Deevy told you.

It sure changed
your mind mighty quick.

All right.

Might be kind of fun to see
Mr. Harper worry a little bit.

Give you something
to think about too, sheriff.

You see, I wasn't the only one
who cared about Joe.

All Deevy told me was
a telegram had been sent

to his brothers.

The Morgan boys.

I think
you've heard of them.

Yeah, we've heard.

Then I guess
I don't have to tell you

what they're gonna
do to you

when they find out
what happened to Joe.

They're great family boys,
those Morgans.

They just might be on their
way here right this minute.

And of course, when they
ask me who did this to Joe,

all I have to do is point,

and that's gonna
give me great pleasure.

Well, it looks like
we're gonna have
our hands full, Jess.

Al and Mac Morgan
are a couple of rough customers.

They both handle a gun
like they were born to it.

It's not
your problem, Mort.

I made the mistake.

I don't see it
that way.

If I'd been in your boots
this morning

and run across
Joe Morgan,

I'd have done
the same thing.

And maybe not have
lived through it.

Well, thanks.

But I can't start letting you
shoulder my troubles.

As far as I'm concerned,
you're wearing a badge
for me this morning.

I back my deputies
all the way,

and my friends
even further,

even though they may be
as stubborn and ornery
as they come.

Of course now, you wouldn't
have a trace of anything

like that in you.

That's right,
not a trace.

I'll level with you,
Jess.

Every lawman in the territory
has been trying

to close the door
on the Morgans,

all of them.

I'm not wanting
to use you as bait,

but it looks like it's already
been set up for us.

Yeah, I reckon.

I guess
I better stay in town.

I don't want to chance them
following me out to the ranch

and getting Daisy and Mike
mixed up in this.

With Slim busted up,
I guess you're stuck with me.

I can't think of anybody
I'd rather be stuck with,

lessin' it was a troop
of horse soldiers.

I'll check
with you later.

They won't be around
for a while.

Where are you
headed?

I feel kind of bad
about that girl, Mort.

I want to see if she's cooled
down enough to listen to me.

I know how you feel, Jess,

but don't let the riffraff
in this town

push you into anything.

All right.

But if they try...

I'm sure you won't mind
if I push back a little.

Deevy.

Howdy, Jess.
Like a drink?

No, thanks, Sam.

Morgan's girl,
is she around?

Well, no,
she just went home.

She has a little place
few miles west of town,

it has a white fence,
you can't miss it.

Thanks.

Jess?

I heard
what she tried to do.

Now it may not
make sense,

she's a pretty nice kid
for the work she does.

They're all nice...
to somebody.

Cal!

Cal!

I need a fresh horse,
Cal.

I'd appreciate
if you take care of mine,
he's down at Mort's.

Are you thinking about
leaving town, Harper?

How about
that horse, Cal?

Well, go on, Cal, you heard
what the back shooter said.

You all right, Cal?

Yeah, sure.
Sure, Jess.

I'm fed up
with the lot of you.

Now clear out,
every one of you.

Look at him.

Drawing on unarmed men.

No cause to worry
though, I guess,

unless we got
our backs turned.

Would two at a time
suit you?

Oh, it suits me
just fine, Harper,

Two at a time.

Jess.

You get me
that horse now, Cal.

I'll never make it
if I have to walk.

Sure, Jess, sure.

Coming right up.

All right, on your feet.

Let me see how fast
you can clear out of here.

Starting right now.

[ knocking on door ]

I'd like to
talk to you, ma'am.

I think
we're about talked out.

No, we ain't.

I'm sorry I come busting
into your home like this,

but I had to.

What do you want?

I want to talk to you.

I don't even know
your name.

It's Gladys.
Gladys Mor.

If that's what you came
to get, you got it.

Now leave me alone.

That isn't
what I came for.

I came to tell you
I was sorry.

That won't
bring back Joe.

No, I reckon
it won't.

You got a real
nice place here.

I've been fixing it up
for Joe and me.

I know it's not much,
but I never had a place
of my own before.

Now it don't mean
anything.

I guess
I know how you feel.

How could you?

Maybe it's not the same,

but I lost
both of my folks

when I was just a kid.

I know what it's like
to be alone.

Why are you bothering
with me?

I don't mean
nothing to you.

I don't mean
nothing to nobody now.

I figure I got you
into this mess.

I'd like to help
get you out of it.

Just how do you expect
to do that?

I got $380
in the Laramie Bank.

It's yours if you want it.

What for?

I don't rightly know.

Maybe you could use it
to go home on.

Back home,
that's a laugh.

What you're trying to say is,
that you're offering me

$380 for Joe.

Isn't that right?

No, it isn't.

And if I had more
I'd give it to you.

I'm sure you would.

But you wouldn't think
he's worth it.

I'm gonna tell you
something, Mr. Harper.

Joe wasn't half as bad

as what you and some
of the other people
in this town think.

He was going straight,
he promised me.

Yes, ma'am,
if you say so.

Well, I say so.

And I don't need any help
from any back shooter,

especially one that doesn't
have very long to live.

Just how well do you
know the Morgans?

Joe told me
about them.

There's nothing much
that can stop them.

No, I reckon not.
And that includes
the law in half the towns

in this territory.

You've said
just about enough.

What's the matter?

Nothing.

Wait a minute.

It's pretty swollen.
Did you break it?

Well, I don't know.

I ran into Deevy and some
of your other friends
before I left town.

Well, they are not
half as rough

as two of
my other friends

that are on their way here
right now.

Then this ought to
make you feel just fine.

Well, thank you for your help
in doing the shopping.

We went so fast, I hardly
had time to talk to anyone.

Well, I always did say
that women folk

could cut their chores
in half

if they'd only ease up
on the chatter.

Is that right now?

You know, I had a feeling
you were asking Jess

to stay in town just to
have someone to chin with.

I guess you caught us,
Miss Daisy.

Jess is helping me
clear up this Morgan thing.

It shouldn't take long.

Truth is, Daisy, I think Slim
is getting more work done

without me
being there.

Well,
not that I can see,

so don't you stay
away too long.

No longer
than I have to.

This town's cooking
can't hold a candle to yours.

Oh, you're flattering me,
Jess Harper, and I love it.

Jess, aren't you
gonna load me up?

You know,
like a sack of potatoes.

Well, yeah, tiger.

Thanks, Jess.

Well, take care
of yourself, Jess.

Goodbye, Mort,
and thanks.

- Bye, Daisy.
- See you, Daisy.

Bye.

You think we
fooled 'em?

Yeah, I think so,
Mort.

Daisy wasn't in town long
enough to find out anything.

I sure hope so.

You all right?

Yeah, I feel all right.

I'm just a little tired.

Think I'll go to the hotel
and get some rest.

Good idea.
I'll be over in the office.

Jess, don't you take
any chances

without letting me
know now, you hear?

Yeah, sure, Mort.

[ knocking on door ]

Who is it?

AL: The Morgans.

Come on, open up.

- You Gladys?
- Yes.

Joe did right well to find
himself this cozy setup.

Oh, this is my house.

Well, sure it is,
Gladys.

We appreciate
the use of it.

We know
all about it from Joe.

You going somewhere?

There's nothing left
for me here now.

Now what's your hurry?

We figured you'd help us
with some unfinished business.

From what I heard,
you're not the types
that need much help.

That's true, honey.

But there's a lot of ways
to skin a cat,

and we'd like
to find the best way.
Now do you know this...

- Harper.
- Harper fella?

I do now.
He's in town.

Got himself a reputation
with a gun, is that right?

I guess so.

But I don't think he'll give
you much trouble, not now.

- How come?
- Well, he got in a fight
in town with Deevy

and some of the others,
and he hurt his gun hand.
He's swollen pretty bad.

Good for Deevy.
Looks like he's finally
been of use to us.

It seems like you know
quite a bit about Harper
and that hand of his.

He was out here today.

He wanted to give me
some money

in case I wanted
to leave town.

I guess he felt sorry
about shooting Joe.

Now wasn't that
nice of him.

How much
did he offer you?

About $400.

That's not much
for a member of the family.

I was worth more than
that on a wanted poster
when I was 17.

I told him I didn't want
a cent of his money.

When are you planning
on going after him?

Well, now,

who said anything
about going after him?

It seems to me like
we can figure out something

to bring him to us.

Ain't no use facing
the whole town

just to get
a dirty back shooter.

Now you figure it
any way you want.

Just as long
as we get him cold.

While brother Al
is thinking,

how about some grub?

You Morgans
eat with your feet?

Your brother Joe had a little
better manners than you two.

Oh, now, Gladys honey,

I don't want to speak
bad of the dead.

But if you're claming
old Joe was a teacup dandy,

you're talking
to the wrong parties.

He was going straight.
We were gonna get married,

that's why I was
fixing this place up.

And you shouldn't talk
about him like that.

Joe?
Married?

Oh, ma'am,

remind me
to fill you in sometime

on the poor dead
and departed.

And how about
that grub, huh?

Well, look at you.

Old Joe had all
the comforts of home, huh?

"Joe was gonna
marry me."

[ knocking on door ]

Jess, it's Mort.

Jess?

Come on in, Mort,
it's not locked.

Could have been
somebody else.

Why don't you keep
that door locked?

What for?
If they want me
that bad,

a lock ain't
gonna stop them.

Well, at least you're
thinking about them.

That's a step
in the right direction.

Why all the sweat?

We don't even know for sure
if they're gonna show up.

We do now.

Morgan sent a reply to Deevy
and that bunch of no-goods.

Got a copy of it.

"Thanks
for the information.

We'll make burial arrangements
with you tomorrow.

Morgans."

Burial arrangements
for who?

Joe Morgan or me?

I tried to find Deevy.

He rode out of town
as soon as he got this.

Probably
went to meet them.

At least we can get
a good night's sleep.

Why don't you
bunk over in the jail?

We ought to
stick together.

Oh, we got
plenty of time.

Besides, I'm bushed.

Thanks anyway, Mort.

I know you run
a real nice jail and all,

but your beds
are harder than rocks.

I can't deny that.

You will need your sleep,
but do me one big favor

and keep that door
locked, huh?

Sure, Mort.

See you
in the morning, early.

Good night.

I said, lock it.

Sure thing, Mort.

You stay awake, Al,
I'm gonna get some shuteye.

You got a plan yet?

It will come.
It will come.

Dirty saddle bum.

Do you have to tear
everything up?

Get your dirty boots
off my couch!

Now why don't you
leave him alone, lady?

Can't you see
he's thinking?

Now don't start crying.

If there's anything
I can't stand,

it's a crying,
moaning woman.

I just can't believe that Joe
could have two brothers

as mean and no good
as you two.

Now there you go again.

I'm beginning to think
you just didn't know
old Joe at all.

Why do you think
Mac and me split with him?

On our own.

Because
he couldn't stand you.

That works both ways,
honey.

Nope.
Joe was a loner.

But then he had to be

'cause nobody except
maybe Mac or me

would dare turn
our backs on him.

If you feel that way about him,
then why bother with Harper?

Well, because
he's our brother.

And...

he's our
meal ticket too.

See, every job
we've ever done with,

planned by Joe.

Oh, he was a good planner.

What do you mean?

Oh, stagecoach hold-ups,
cattle rustling,

whatever turned a profit.

We'd all meet somewhere,

and Joe would have
the job all planned.

See...

he's a mite quicker
than Mac and me.

We pulled the job,
split the take,

and then Joe
would come back here.

I don't believe you.

That's 'cause
you don't want to.

But I'll prove it.

Now any time
you have a mind to,

you go out back and dig up
that vegetable garden you got,

you know
what you'll find?

You'll find a strong
box, that's what.

Three of us took it off
a stage about a month ago.

Hey, as a matter of fact,

old Joe killed
a shotgun guard.

That's right.

He killed a man?

Oh, lady.

That old Joe of yours,
you might say,

got away with murder.

Got away with
murder, got it?

[ horse approaching ]

Horse outside.

[ knocking on door ]

Who is it?

It's Deevy.
Let me in.

Say, have you seen
the Morgans ar--

That's what I thought
I'd find you two out here.

You get the telegram?

Yeah, and I
got out of town

before the sheriff
could stop me.

Sure you weren't
followed?

Well, don't worry
about that.

I got a couple
of friends in town

keeping an eye
on him and Harper.

When are you gonna
get him, Mac?

I got me a little
plan now, Deevy.

I'm glad
you stopped by.

Want you to take a note
to that Harper fella.

Sure, Mac, I know
right where he is.

Good.

Okay, I want that back
shooter out here alone.

So you can start thinking

what you're gonna
write in it, little lady.

'Cause what you say is
what's gonna get him here.

Now I know you want
to do that,

for Joe's sake.

Is that the truth now?

All clear.

Sheriff's got his horse
tied in front of his office.

All right.
Make it sound good.

You sure you can
outride him?

I got
Mac Morgan's horse.

He's the fastest one
in these parts.

As soon as you see
the sheriff head out after me,

you get this to Harper,
and don't let him
see you.

No problem.

There goes Tip now.

Morning, sheriff.

Morning.
Kind of early for you to
be up and around, isn't it?

No, just doing my duty
as a citizen, that's all.

Like what?

I understand
you'd like to know

where our friend
Deevy is.

And you're gonna tell me?

Am I? If you make it
worth my while.

Is there anything you
wouldn't do for money, Tip?

I can't think of a thing.

Including
turning in a friend.

Oh, I figured Deevy
would do the same for me.

Well?

I just seen him
across the watch,

heading toward town.

He might still be
out there.

Why didn't you say so
in the first place?

[ knocking on door ]

Who is it?

Mort?

Mort?

Them Morgans
sure got heads on 'em.

They'll not only
get that back shooter,

they get
all his money too.

And the sheriff
pays me for my part.

Yeah and me too.

You be sure Mort gets
that message, huh, Cal?

Are you sure you ought to
go up to that girl's place?

I got to.
She wouldn't be asking
for money from me

unless she
really needed it.

And if the Morgans
are up there?

One place is as good
as another.

I'm gonna wait
out front,

you cover him
from the window.

Nothing to it.

Now leave him to me,
you hear?

Unless something
goes real wrong.

Suit yourself.

But when people find out
he had a busted hand,

they ain't gonna think
too much of you
facing up to him.

Maybe they won't know.

You don't examine
a man full of lead

for a broken hand.

Anyhow, that's
the way I want it.

He shot Joe in the back,
I'm gonna take him head on.

Have it your way, as long
as I get half his money.

He was gonna give
that money to me.

Well,
things have changed.

By all rights, it should
go to Joe's next of kin.

Keep your eye on her.

He was gonna
give you that money.

Something
on your mind?

Just wondered if you
and Mac had any plans for
after this is over.

What's it to you?

Well, I thought you might
like a little company.

I figured you
as the type of woman

to go where the money was.

Forget it.

But I could keep
house for you.

Stay right
where you are.

Harper!

Name's Mac Morgan.

Where's your brother?

Sighting in on my back?

Don't need two
for a dirty back shooter.

I'm giving you the chance
you never gave Joe.

You must know
something, Morgan.

Unless your brother
said to drop me

the second
I go for my gun.

You figure it matters
the way it is?

You're getting a better break
than you gave Joe

no matter
how the wind blows.

All right, Morgan.

You figure I back shot
your brother.

Well, just for the record,
I didn't.

But if you start
to draw on me,

I'm gonna stop you
the best way I can.

It seems like
the talking is over.

I thought you said
he couldn't use a gun.

What made you
change your mind?

You were right.

Joe was as bad as both
of them put together...

killer and a thief.

I don't suppose
you'll believe me,

but I didn't know it...

or at least
I didn't want to.

Right now I'm too pleased
about still breathing.

I reckon I'll believe
anything you say.

Well, we certainly wish you
all the luck in the world

when you
get back home.

Oh, thank you,
Daisy.

I never would have
been able to do it

if Jess here
hadn't insisted

I take that reward money
for the Morgan boys.

Well, if it hadn't
been for you,

they wouldn't be
in jail now.

I'd likely be sitting
on a cloud somewhere

playing a harp.

That'll be the day.

Gladys, I tell you,
if that hat you're wearing

is a sample of those you're
going to sell in your shop,

it will be
a tremendous success.

You mean,
she can get money

for something
like that?

Mike!

Take that bag
out to the stage.

You are much
too young

to have an opinion
about women's hats.

Oh, Jess,
I don't know--

No, whoa, now.

You thank me
one more time,

I'm gonna eat
all the flowers off

that thing
you call a hat.

Well.

That was
pretty close, pard.

For a minute,
I thought you were gonna go
into the ladies hat business.

Well, wait a minute now.

To know something
about ladies hats,
you have to understand women.

That's one thing I don't
think I ever will.

[ groans ]