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1
00:00:03,627 --> 00:00:08,108
Here in the suburbs, people do whatever
they can to avoid getting old...
2
00:00:13,545 --> 00:00:15,355
And my dad was no exception.
3
00:00:18,593 --> 00:00:20,713
Gray chest hair.
4
00:00:23,159 --> 00:00:24,926
So that's what it's come to.
5
00:00:27,493 --> 00:00:29,293
Hey, can we get some
sugar cereal, George?
6
00:00:29,390 --> 00:00:30,666
Do you have any idea how long
it's been since I've seen a
7
00:00:30,755 --> 00:00:33,159
Leprechaun or a Cap'n?
8
00:00:33,300 --> 00:00:33,915
Tell me the truth.
9
00:00:33,993 --> 00:00:36,074
Do I look old enough
to have a 16-year-old?
10
00:00:36,162 --> 00:00:36,845
Oh, here we go.
11
00:00:36,935 --> 00:00:37,881
16.
12
00:00:37,968 --> 00:00:39,816
I can't believe you're
turning 16 this weekend.
13
00:00:39,905 --> 00:00:41,449
My little girl.
14
00:00:42,334 --> 00:00:44,301
That's a little bit more
sugar than I was hoping for.
15
00:00:44,386 --> 00:00:46,020
Come on, Tessa.
16
00:00:46,106 --> 00:00:46,980
Aren't you excited about it?
17
00:00:47,048 --> 00:00:47,811
Don't you want a party?
18
00:00:47,878 --> 00:00:48,579
I'm having a party.
19
00:00:48,653 --> 00:00:50,178
Lisa and Malik are
coming over for pizza.
20
00:00:50,263 --> 00:00:50,814
Ugh.
21
00:00:50,881 --> 00:00:51,682
Boo!
22
00:00:51,754 --> 00:00:52,291
Come on.
23
00:00:52,355 --> 00:00:54,122
This is your 16th birthday.
24
00:00:54,218 --> 00:00:55,500
Let's go big.
25
00:00:55,584 --> 00:00:56,171
Okay, fine.
26
00:00:56,246 --> 00:00:57,985
We'll order the extra large.
27
00:00:58,060 --> 00:01:01,548
Hey, if you're worried
about money, don't be.
28
00:01:01,620 --> 00:01:03,189
Things are picking up for me.
29
00:01:03,323 --> 00:01:06,701
I can afford to spoil my
only daughter a little.
30
00:01:06,776 --> 00:01:08,778
I've got some very good
ideas for your present.
31
00:01:08,883 --> 00:01:10,924
Can one of 'em be that
you don't pick it out?
32
00:01:12,574 --> 00:01:14,486
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
33
00:01:14,613 --> 00:01:19,664
♪ Last night I had a
pleasant nightmare ♪
34
00:01:19,759 --> 00:01:22,112
♪ da-da-da-da, da, da, da, da ♪
35
00:01:24,405 --> 00:01:26,882
When shopping in the suburbs,
there's only one place that has
36
00:01:26,974 --> 00:01:29,565
everything a girl could want
for her birthday...
37
00:01:29,660 --> 00:01:32,287
Plus Leprechaun cereal...
And meat.
38
00:01:32,416 --> 00:01:34,208
That's a lot of bath tissue.
39
00:01:34,299 --> 00:01:35,243
It's always good to be prepared.
40
00:01:37,502 --> 00:01:39,382
- I cannot believe...
- What?
41
00:01:39,467 --> 00:01:42,107
They put average shelf
life in the clearance bin.
42
00:01:42,177 --> 00:01:44,395
That is exactly what is
wrong with this place.
43
00:01:44,500 --> 00:01:45,384
$4.99.
44
00:01:45,459 --> 00:01:48,015
You know, I-I gotta say, I
was willing to spend $6.
45
00:01:48,111 --> 00:01:51,217
I already downloaded it, but
now I have the liner notes.
46
00:01:51,318 --> 00:01:54,929
These guys are, like, the
best indie band ever.
47
00:01:55,028 --> 00:01:56,300
They have an oboe.
48
00:01:56,401 --> 00:01:57,347
Really?
49
00:02:00,619 --> 00:02:01,832
Ear hair trimmers?
50
00:02:01,916 --> 00:02:02,726
Are these ours?
51
00:02:02,800 --> 00:02:03,667
Just... you need it.
52
00:02:03,745 --> 00:02:05,473
I d-- I don't have hairy ears.
53
00:02:05,572 --> 00:02:06,623
Look who it is.
54
00:02:07,551 --> 00:02:08,289
Hey, guys!
55
00:02:08,378 --> 00:02:09,019
Hey.
56
00:02:09,109 --> 00:02:11,613
Oh, I hate to bump into people
when I'm not wearing any makeup.
57
00:02:11,704 --> 00:02:12,469
Don't look at me.
58
00:02:12,538 --> 00:02:13,288
I'm a wreck.
59
00:02:13,382 --> 00:02:15,740
You have a veiny forehead.
60
00:02:15,830 --> 00:02:17,778
Isn't this place just the best?
61
00:02:17,865 --> 00:02:20,751
I mean, where else can you buy
mayonnaise and nail Polish remover?
62
00:02:20,835 --> 00:02:23,009
Any... store.
63
00:02:23,106 --> 00:02:24,694
Yes, but not so very much of it.
64
00:02:25,725 --> 00:02:26,331
Oh.
65
00:02:26,414 --> 00:02:27,554
What are you campers
shopping for?
66
00:02:27,667 --> 00:02:29,924
Oh, nothing. Just, uh, a present...
67
00:02:30,019 --> 00:02:31,624
For Tessa's 16th birthday.
68
00:02:32,232 --> 00:02:33,491
Tessa's turning Sweet 16.
69
00:02:33,570 --> 00:02:34,209
Oh, my God.
70
00:02:34,288 --> 00:02:34,991
That's huge.
71
00:02:35,074 --> 00:02:35,842
Tell me all about your party.
72
00:02:35,915 --> 00:02:37,109
Don't leave out a single detail.
73
00:02:37,206 --> 00:02:38,200
Okay, details.
74
00:02:38,324 --> 00:02:39,313
Uh, let's see.
75
00:02:39,398 --> 00:02:41,706
A couple friends are coming
over for pizza and a movie.
76
00:02:41,811 --> 00:02:42,620
And?
77
00:02:42,710 --> 00:02:44,001
And we might not do the movie.
78
00:02:44,096 --> 00:02:45,367
No.
79
00:02:45,482 --> 00:02:46,179
No!
80
00:02:46,267 --> 00:02:47,340
No, no, no!
81
00:02:47,487 --> 00:02:48,751
Did you hear that, Dalia?
82
00:02:48,866 --> 00:02:49,739
No.
83
00:02:49,826 --> 00:02:52,250
You gotta go big,
make it an event.
84
00:02:52,358 --> 00:02:54,615
That's what I said, but, uh, you
know, she wants to keep it low-key.
85
00:02:54,700 --> 00:02:55,247
It's true.
86
00:02:55,338 --> 00:02:56,283
This is all want.
87
00:02:56,383 --> 00:02:58,790
They are my favorite band.
88
00:02:58,899 --> 00:03:00,045
For serious?
89
00:03:00,152 --> 00:03:01,589
Let me see this.
90
00:03:02,083 --> 00:03:05,267
Oh, my husband's colleague owns
this label and a major taco
91
00:03:05,349 --> 00:03:09,491
franchise and a white tiger...
Or a bengal.
92
00:03:09,601 --> 00:03:10,427
I'm not sure.
93
00:03:10,526 --> 00:03:14,016
But, anyway, it's too bad that
you're not having a big party,
94
00:03:14,106 --> 00:03:16,895
'cause if you were, he could
probably get 'em to play.
95
00:03:17,187 --> 00:03:18,190
Wait.
96
00:03:18,347 --> 00:03:19,973
Average Shelf Life?
97
00:03:20,086 --> 00:03:22,080
You cannot get ASL
to play at my party.
98
00:03:22,168 --> 00:03:26,402
Well, not for two buddies and a pizza,
but if it were a big event...
99
00:03:26,489 --> 00:03:27,320
Who said two buddies a pizza?
100
00:03:27,421 --> 00:03:29,515
No buddies and a pizza.
101
00:03:29,637 --> 00:03:30,653
We're going big.
102
00:03:30,785 --> 00:03:32,627
Aren't we going big, George?
103
00:03:32,701 --> 00:03:33,610
- Well, you did say--
- I said we're going big.
104
00:03:33,682 --> 00:03:34,552
That's what I said.
105
00:03:34,621 --> 00:03:35,525
Two buddies and a pizza.
106
00:03:35,641 --> 00:03:36,191
Pfft.
107
00:03:36,322 --> 00:03:37,315
George?
108
00:03:40,778 --> 00:03:43,072
♪ Here come the mannequins ♪
109
00:03:43,186 --> 00:03:46,203
♪ avert your eyes,
avert your eyes ♪
110
00:03:46,324 --> 00:03:48,756
♪ tall and cruel and terrible ♪
111
00:03:48,942 --> 00:03:49,483
Hmm.
112
00:03:49,566 --> 00:03:51,505
♪ No common ground,
no common ground ♪
113
00:03:51,588 --> 00:03:52,749
Oh, do you hear an oboe?
114
00:03:53,680 --> 00:03:55,035
What exactly are
they singing about?
115
00:03:55,126 --> 00:03:55,889
I don't know.
116
00:03:55,969 --> 00:03:59,258
A, uh, I think a prostitute
who becomes a...
117
00:04:00,508 --> 00:04:02,237
Scientist or something.
118
00:04:02,375 --> 00:04:03,357
I couldn't follow.
119
00:04:04,814 --> 00:04:05,700
We're old.
120
00:04:05,771 --> 00:04:06,592
We're not old.
121
00:04:06,689 --> 00:04:08,609
It's just... they're not good.
122
00:04:09,423 --> 00:04:10,740
We're old, George.
123
00:04:10,817 --> 00:04:11,388
We are.
124
00:04:11,463 --> 00:04:12,735
I found a gray chest
hair last week.
125
00:04:12,803 --> 00:04:13,757
That-- that doesn't
mean anything.
126
00:04:13,825 --> 00:04:15,091
Young people get
those all the time.
127
00:04:15,204 --> 00:04:16,504
I looked it up.
128
00:04:16,622 --> 00:04:18,781
How much time do you
think we have left?
129
00:04:18,892 --> 00:04:19,529
Would you stop it?
130
00:04:19,624 --> 00:04:20,618
We're not going anywhere.
131
00:04:20,693 --> 00:04:21,881
We're young.
132
00:04:21,967 --> 00:04:22,636
We're healthy.
133
00:04:22,720 --> 00:04:23,547
I'm tan.
134
00:04:23,633 --> 00:04:24,701
And you always will be.
135
00:04:24,789 --> 00:04:25,252
All right.
136
00:04:25,329 --> 00:04:26,755
We're gorgeous, buddy!
137
00:04:27,023 --> 00:04:28,618
We're gonna live forever!
138
00:04:34,490 --> 00:04:35,280
Ow!
139
00:04:36,084 --> 00:04:36,956
Ow!
140
00:04:37,096 --> 00:04:39,108
Aah! Ohh!
141
00:04:39,214 --> 00:04:41,275
Aah, aah. Ohh.
142
00:04:42,153 --> 00:04:43,142
Is it a bee sting?
143
00:04:43,220 --> 00:04:43,773
A cut?
144
00:04:43,840 --> 00:04:44,469
Did you touch poison ivy?
145
00:04:44,557 --> 00:04:45,342
Is it a fever?
146
00:04:45,443 --> 00:04:45,951
A rash?
147
00:04:46,028 --> 00:04:47,328
Are you choking?
148
00:04:47,448 --> 00:04:47,808
Can you speak?
149
00:04:47,876 --> 00:04:48,394
Yes.
No.
150
00:04:48,488 --> 00:04:50,131
Don't touch-- Don't
touch me, please.
151
00:04:50,213 --> 00:04:51,019
It's my back.
152
00:04:51,156 --> 00:04:52,263
It's okay, George.
153
00:04:52,338 --> 00:04:52,978
I'm here.
154
00:04:53,046 --> 00:04:54,053
Everything's gonna be fine.
155
00:04:54,384 --> 00:04:55,728
Ladies, you can go now.
156
00:04:55,979 --> 00:04:57,067
I've got this under control.
157
00:04:57,530 --> 00:04:57,800
Oh.
158
00:04:57,880 --> 00:04:58,335
Okay.
159
00:04:58,407 --> 00:04:59,420
It'll be fine.
160
00:05:00,321 --> 00:05:01,614
I said I've got this, Lucille!
161
00:05:03,480 --> 00:05:07,150
Everything's gonna be okay.
162
00:05:09,127 --> 00:05:10,242
Tessa?
163
00:05:11,718 --> 00:05:12,680
Don't tell me.
164
00:05:13,070 --> 00:05:15,152
You didn't get the
band, did you?
165
00:05:15,376 --> 00:05:19,374
No... but... I got the band!
166
00:05:19,497 --> 00:05:21,662
You got Average Shelf Life?
167
00:05:21,748 --> 00:05:23,125
Average Shelf Life?
168
00:05:23,229 --> 00:05:24,256
That's the band you wanted?
169
00:05:24,350 --> 00:05:25,101
Yeah.
170
00:05:25,189 --> 00:05:29,059
Shoot... 'Cause...
That's the band I got!
171
00:05:29,150 --> 00:05:30,294
Stop doing that!
172
00:05:30,384 --> 00:05:32,656
Now all you need is a top-notch
party planner to whip it
173
00:05:32,743 --> 00:05:37,288
together in time, and I know
someone who's smart, stylish,
174
00:05:37,429 --> 00:05:42,138
well-connected, and happens to be
standing right in front of you.
175
00:05:42,227 --> 00:05:42,786
Wow.
176
00:05:42,874 --> 00:05:44,396
You'd really help
plan my party, too?
177
00:05:44,489 --> 00:05:45,063
Me?
178
00:05:45,150 --> 00:05:45,894
No.
179
00:05:45,998 --> 00:05:48,389
Dalia.
180
00:05:51,033 --> 00:05:51,923
Hey.
181
00:05:52,070 --> 00:05:52,653
Oh.
182
00:05:52,736 --> 00:05:53,283
Pfft.
183
00:05:53,366 --> 00:05:53,965
No.
184
00:05:55,168 --> 00:05:56,348
No, no, no, no, no.
185
00:05:56,430 --> 00:05:56,918
Hey, hey, hey.
186
00:05:56,994 --> 00:05:57,749
Let me tell you
something, Tessa.
187
00:05:57,827 --> 00:06:01,102
Ever since Dalia failed her
career aptitude test, her dad's
188
00:06:01,188 --> 00:06:03,179
been leaning on me to
make sure she has one.
189
00:06:03,267 --> 00:06:03,972
A career?
190
00:06:04,060 --> 00:06:06,944
An aptitude, and I'm
pretty sure this is it.
191
00:06:07,028 --> 00:06:07,637
It is.
192
00:06:07,720 --> 00:06:08,392
It's it!
193
00:06:08,466 --> 00:06:12,901
Plus I'd consider this a real solid,
which I don't mind asking you
194
00:06:13,030 --> 00:06:16,908
for, being as that I just did
you an even realer solid with
195
00:06:17,033 --> 00:06:18,659
the whole band thing and all.
196
00:06:19,497 --> 00:06:20,585
What do you think?
197
00:06:20,717 --> 00:06:23,940
Well, when you put it like
that, how can I say no?
198
00:06:24,120 --> 00:06:25,005
You can't!
199
00:06:25,101 --> 00:06:25,751
Aah!
200
00:06:27,639 --> 00:06:28,533
Mm-hmm.
201
00:06:29,854 --> 00:06:31,096
- I had a few thoughts...
- Mm-hmm.
202
00:06:31,197 --> 00:06:34,367
Sort of a jumping-off point of
how I want my party to look.
203
00:06:34,462 --> 00:06:34,971
Wait.
204
00:06:35,073 --> 00:06:36,257
Let me get a pencil.
205
00:06:37,906 --> 00:06:41,018
I couldn't think of a single
worse person to plan my party,
206
00:06:41,135 --> 00:06:44,586
but at least Dalia seemed
willing to listen.
207
00:06:50,125 --> 00:06:51,157
Okay.
208
00:06:51,298 --> 00:06:52,085
Ready.
209
00:06:52,182 --> 00:06:53,618
Okay, uh...
210
00:06:54,046 --> 00:06:56,753
When I was living in New York,
my friend Oskar had this...
211
00:06:56,884 --> 00:07:02,047
Rooftop soiree, where they, uh,
grilled yakitori on a hibachi.
212
00:07:02,161 --> 00:07:07,015
Yeah, I don't like any of those words,
so, listen, here's what we're gonna do.
213
00:07:07,253 --> 00:07:10,402
First of all, it's gonna
be at the country club.
214
00:07:10,534 --> 00:07:14,499
I'm thinking monochromatic,
two-tone colors with a bunch of
215
00:07:14,589 --> 00:07:17,513
different colors.
I also want to have a pony station, where
216
00:07:17,601 --> 00:07:18,960
you can take pictures
with a pony.
217
00:07:19,067 --> 00:07:22,448
Yep, Dalia was listening, all
right, but only to herself.
218
00:07:22,537 --> 00:07:23,994
Now let's talk go-go cages.
219
00:07:24,168 --> 00:07:26,626
I don't want go-go
cages at my party.
220
00:07:26,715 --> 00:07:28,210
I don't know why they
have to be in cages.
221
00:07:28,302 --> 00:07:30,093
When I was a boy, women
danced free-range.
222
00:07:30,193 --> 00:07:32,555
I can't believe I agreed to
let Dalia plan my party.
223
00:07:32,647 --> 00:07:35,413
Trust me, years from now, all you're
gonna remember is the good stuff,
224
00:07:35,503 --> 00:07:38,643
that the band you love played
at your 16th birthday.
225
00:07:38,735 --> 00:07:41,646
I got mono on my 16th birthday,
and the only thing I remember
226
00:07:41,733 --> 00:07:43,690
is kissing the girl
who gave it to me.
227
00:07:43,784 --> 00:07:44,511
What was her name?
228
00:07:44,598 --> 00:07:45,366
I don't remember.
229
00:07:45,469 --> 00:07:46,842
Because it was 9
million years ago?
230
00:07:46,936 --> 00:07:48,766
Yes, because it was 9
million years ago.
231
00:07:48,848 --> 00:07:50,208
You're getting meaner
in your old age.
232
00:07:50,299 --> 00:07:50,931
Do you know that?
233
00:07:51,020 --> 00:07:51,636
Ah-ha.
234
00:07:51,723 --> 00:07:52,383
Aah.
235
00:07:52,559 --> 00:07:53,990
Easy, easy, easy.
236
00:07:54,076 --> 00:07:55,292
Shh, shh, shh, shh, shh.
237
00:07:56,242 --> 00:08:01,860
Tessa, your father is still in the
Sheila Shay ICU, and I see you...
238
00:08:01,999 --> 00:08:03,011
Are disturbing him.
239
00:08:05,020 --> 00:08:06,030
Here's your pill, George.
240
00:08:06,278 --> 00:08:06,865
Thank you.
241
00:08:09,443 --> 00:08:10,971
I don't know what I
would have done without you, Sheila.
242
00:08:11,064 --> 00:08:12,229
You probably would have died.
243
00:08:15,455 --> 00:08:16,472
I'll get that.
244
00:08:16,572 --> 00:08:17,086
Yeah.
245
00:08:17,276 --> 00:08:17,939
Ohh.
246
00:08:18,645 --> 00:08:19,977
That woman has been amazing.
247
00:08:20,061 --> 00:08:22,015
Promise me she hasn't
given you a sponge bath.
248
00:08:23,162 --> 00:08:24,766
I can't promise you anything.
249
00:08:25,538 --> 00:08:26,506
What are you taking?
250
00:08:27,753 --> 00:08:30,043
Pain pills from
Sheila's hysterectomy.
251
00:08:30,146 --> 00:08:32,289
Did you know they saved
two-thirds of one of her ovaries?
252
00:08:32,400 --> 00:08:34,438
Excuse me.
253
00:08:34,892 --> 00:08:36,968
I'm gonna go watch a documentary
about dolphin murder so I can
254
00:08:37,050 --> 00:08:38,048
forget that image.
255
00:08:39,869 --> 00:08:41,008
Hello, Dallas.
256
00:08:41,088 --> 00:08:44,235
Hi... Sheila.
I brought George some chicken soup.
257
00:08:44,342 --> 00:08:46,240
My housekeeper made it, but
I paid for the ingredients.
258
00:08:46,332 --> 00:08:49,219
Oh, how nice.
I'll definitely see that he gets it.
259
00:08:49,321 --> 00:08:53,026
Actually, I thought I'd give
it to him myself and say hi.
260
00:08:53,111 --> 00:08:56,316
That's sweet that you think he'd like to
see you, but I'm gonna have to say no.
261
00:08:56,406 --> 00:08:58,243
Don't do this, Sheila.
262
00:08:58,356 --> 00:08:59,664
Not again.
263
00:08:59,781 --> 00:09:01,969
I am sure I don't know
what you're talking about.
264
00:09:02,064 --> 00:09:02,780
Oh, please.
265
00:09:02,884 --> 00:09:04,570
You mother until you smother.
266
00:09:04,679 --> 00:09:07,715
I did not kill Tom Jesperson!
267
00:09:07,803 --> 00:09:08,393
Oh, no?
268
00:09:08,469 --> 00:09:10,850
It was just you there for three and
a half weeks, taking care of him.
269
00:09:10,938 --> 00:09:11,573
He needed help.
270
00:09:11,650 --> 00:09:12,539
He had sciatica!
271
00:09:12,626 --> 00:09:13,524
You don't die of sciatica!
272
00:09:13,606 --> 00:09:15,303
Visiting hours are over!
273
00:09:20,934 --> 00:09:21,790
Ugh!
274
00:09:22,130 --> 00:09:23,318
Relax.
275
00:09:25,810 --> 00:09:27,087
Mommy's here.
276
00:09:31,626 --> 00:09:33,741
So at what point in the party were you
thinking of doing the freeze dance?
277
00:09:33,836 --> 00:09:37,168
- Yeah, 'cause I just got the robot
down, so... - Sorry, guys.
278
00:09:37,259 --> 00:09:39,424
There's no freeze dance.
279
00:09:39,642 --> 00:09:40,551
I knew it.
280
00:09:40,686 --> 00:09:41,567
Three days wasted.
281
00:09:41,663 --> 00:09:42,771
It never hurts to
practice, right?
282
00:09:42,864 --> 00:09:44,366
Trust your instincts, Lisa.
283
00:09:44,470 --> 00:09:45,237
All right, beeyotch.
284
00:09:45,336 --> 00:09:47,871
Time to go dress
shopping for your party.
285
00:09:47,967 --> 00:09:49,651
And if I decline?
286
00:09:49,748 --> 00:09:51,991
Then you won't see your band again...
Alive.
287
00:09:52,080 --> 00:09:53,891
You mean "live."
288
00:09:58,846 --> 00:10:00,020
See you guys later, apparently.
289
00:10:03,151 --> 00:10:05,180
"It's time to go dress
shopping, beeyotch."
290
00:10:07,534 --> 00:10:08,643
Can they just leave
school like that?
291
00:10:08,787 --> 00:10:09,990
Probably not.
292
00:10:10,081 --> 00:10:11,481
We have, like,
four periods left.
293
00:10:11,574 --> 00:10:12,096
Yeah.
294
00:10:12,201 --> 00:10:13,724
Wake up.
295
00:10:14,113 --> 00:10:15,750
Wakey, wakey.
296
00:10:16,018 --> 00:10:16,404
Huh?
297
00:10:16,499 --> 00:10:18,402
You've got a visitor,
sleepy puss.
298
00:10:19,166 --> 00:10:19,830
Hey, buddy.
299
00:10:19,906 --> 00:10:21,119
Look who's sleeping on the job.
300
00:10:22,597 --> 00:10:23,172
Ohh.
301
00:10:23,267 --> 00:10:24,112
He's in a lot of pain.
Poor bunny.
302
00:10:24,208 --> 00:10:25,053
He can barely talk.
303
00:10:25,132 --> 00:10:25,818
I can bahk.
304
00:10:25,899 --> 00:10:26,668
Shh, shh.
305
00:10:26,745 --> 00:10:28,110
Buddy, buddy, buddy.
306
00:10:28,183 --> 00:10:28,988
Here.
307
00:10:29,098 --> 00:10:29,922
Scoot over.
308
00:10:30,040 --> 00:10:31,485
Just listen to me, all right?
309
00:10:32,498 --> 00:10:34,072
I need you to help
me move a sofa.
310
00:10:36,282 --> 00:10:37,556
I'm kidding.
311
00:10:37,671 --> 00:10:38,592
I'm kidding.
312
00:10:38,680 --> 00:10:42,474
But seriously, you know how you are
throwing that Sweet 16 party for Tessa?
313
00:10:44,570 --> 00:10:45,634
She's gonna kill me.
314
00:10:45,882 --> 00:10:46,553
I know.
315
00:10:46,637 --> 00:10:49,548
These things can be expensive,
but I was thinking, because I'm
316
00:10:49,641 --> 00:10:52,509
a cosmetic dentist and this
party is gonna be crawling with
317
00:10:52,596 --> 00:10:55,298
insecure teenagers with all
kinds of dental needs, what if
318
00:10:55,386 --> 00:10:58,416
my practice sponsored the event?
319
00:10:58,638 --> 00:10:59,787
Help me.
320
00:10:59,868 --> 00:11:00,536
Exactly.
321
00:11:00,614 --> 00:11:02,371
I'll help you, which
will help me.
322
00:11:02,454 --> 00:11:03,535
It's a win-win.
323
00:11:03,627 --> 00:11:04,401
All right, buddy.
324
00:11:04,483 --> 00:11:06,372
I'm gonna-- I'm gonna
let you heal up, okay?
325
00:11:07,001 --> 00:11:07,626
You take care.
326
00:11:07,706 --> 00:11:08,465
- What?!
- Ohh!
327
00:11:09,019 --> 00:11:10,028
You flinched.
That's on you.
328
00:11:10,118 --> 00:11:11,408
Hey, Sheila.
329
00:11:11,478 --> 00:11:12,967
Take care of my boy, would ya?
330
00:11:13,972 --> 00:11:16,545
No... wait.
331
00:11:17,168 --> 00:11:18,694
I think I found some
dresses to try on.
332
00:11:18,799 --> 00:11:21,693
The one with the buttons is
doable, but, mm, I don't know.
333
00:11:21,785 --> 00:11:22,993
Let me see.
334
00:11:25,192 --> 00:11:26,215
What did you do that for?
335
00:11:26,316 --> 00:11:27,115
They're dirt-colored.
336
00:11:27,208 --> 00:11:29,255
The color of dirt doesn't
look good on people.
337
00:11:29,345 --> 00:11:30,262
They're not dirt-colored.
338
00:11:30,355 --> 00:11:32,984
They're brown, and it's the
color that I want to wear.
339
00:11:33,079 --> 00:11:34,029
Ooh, bad choice.
340
00:11:34,130 --> 00:11:36,597
I gave you the "take your picture with
a pony" booth, so give this one to me.
341
00:11:36,680 --> 00:11:38,014
It's my party.
342
00:11:38,155 --> 00:11:40,734
Yeah, your "non-band party that
won't have a band unless you
343
00:11:40,819 --> 00:11:43,504
wear the dress I picked out for you...
Party,"
344
00:11:43,615 --> 00:11:45,892
so go try on the dress
I picked out for you.
345
00:11:46,006 --> 00:11:47,182
It's in the tiny room.
346
00:11:51,059 --> 00:11:51,822
♪ Heading to the club,
I feel like dancing ♪
347
00:11:53,056 --> 00:11:54,716
♪ I feel like dancing,
I'm-a let my hair down ♪
348
00:11:54,803 --> 00:11:55,728
♪ I'm-a do some sweatin',
do some sweatin' ♪
349
00:11:55,809 --> 00:11:58,097
Brown is one of
your basic colors.
350
00:11:59,682 --> 00:12:00,634
Basic brown.
351
00:12:01,390 --> 00:12:02,139
That's a thing.
352
00:12:02,803 --> 00:12:03,225
God.
353
00:12:03,313 --> 00:12:06,617
She doesn't know what I look
good in or what I like.
354
00:12:09,308 --> 00:12:10,565
See?
355
00:12:10,987 --> 00:12:12,187
You look good.
356
00:12:17,371 --> 00:12:22,341
I did look good, really good,
actually, but I wasn't about to give
357
00:12:22,434 --> 00:12:25,143
Dalia the satisfaction of
knowing I felt that way.
358
00:12:25,249 --> 00:12:27,333
I'm gonna look so pretty
next to that pony.
359
00:12:37,419 --> 00:12:38,538
Wow.
360
00:12:39,070 --> 00:12:40,360
Look at you.
361
00:12:40,706 --> 00:12:42,094
Don't start crying, George.
362
00:12:42,399 --> 00:12:45,283
If you cry, it'll make it seem
much more cold when I leave you.
363
00:12:45,657 --> 00:12:47,107
Wish I could be there.
364
00:12:47,329 --> 00:12:52,642
Me, too, old man, but as soon
as the fun stuff's over, I'll
365
00:12:52,746 --> 00:12:54,492
come visit you at the home.
366
00:12:54,804 --> 00:12:56,169
Okay, but don't come after 7:00.
367
00:12:56,470 --> 00:12:59,253
We're having blended carrots and
watching "Father Dowling Mysteries."
368
00:13:04,441 --> 00:13:06,109
Thanks for doing this, dad.
369
00:13:06,712 --> 00:13:08,357
I promise I'll take pictures.
370
00:13:09,179 --> 00:13:10,777
You'd better.
371
00:13:16,677 --> 00:13:17,965
They grow up so fast.
372
00:13:18,753 --> 00:13:19,365
Ow.
373
00:13:19,471 --> 00:13:20,476
Here you go.
374
00:13:26,606 --> 00:13:28,290
Attaboy.
375
00:13:32,371 --> 00:13:34,305
Now close your eyes
and get some sleep.
376
00:13:36,500 --> 00:13:38,555
Us old-timers need our rest.
377
00:13:40,709 --> 00:13:42,971
George wasn't about to
go down without a fight.
378
00:13:43,472 --> 00:13:46,556
He still had one thing left
to do on his bucket list.
379
00:13:46,841 --> 00:13:48,443
Not this old-timer, Sheila.
380
00:13:53,015 --> 00:13:54,870
Normally, I'm not the kind of girl...
Whoa.
381
00:13:54,961 --> 00:13:57,554
Who'd be impressed by giant
snowflakes, lasers...
382
00:13:58,570 --> 00:14:03,492
That guy, and the term "sweet
16" makes my skin crawl, but it
383
00:14:03,619 --> 00:14:07,889
was pretty sweet, and I was
16, so there you have it.
384
00:14:08,008 --> 00:14:09,800
I owed Dalia a
massive thank-you.
385
00:14:09,887 --> 00:14:10,816
You're welcome.
386
00:14:12,138 --> 00:14:13,133
Hello?
387
00:14:14,232 --> 00:14:15,361
Care for a Tessa-tini?
388
00:14:15,467 --> 00:14:17,731
Oh, uh, what's in a Tessa-tini?
389
00:14:17,805 --> 00:14:20,913
Grape soda, black tea, and
just a splash of beet juice.
390
00:14:20,994 --> 00:14:22,535
It sounds awful, but
it tastes delicious.
391
00:14:22,620 --> 00:14:23,190
No.
392
00:14:24,351 --> 00:14:25,809
It'll stain the hell
out of your teeth.
393
00:14:26,787 --> 00:14:28,244
It's a dentist's dream.
394
00:14:28,344 --> 00:14:29,774
Hey, drink up, everybody!
395
00:14:29,883 --> 00:14:31,523
There's more where
that came from.
396
00:14:33,539 --> 00:14:35,637
Have a good time, Tessa.
397
00:14:35,719 --> 00:14:42,257
Tonight is your night...
And mine... and yours!
398
00:14:42,858 --> 00:14:44,055
And mine.
399
00:14:45,328 --> 00:14:46,446
Whoo-hoo!
400
00:14:49,697 --> 00:14:50,418
Hey, Kimantha.
401
00:14:50,498 --> 00:14:51,980
All right!
Whoo-hoo!
402
00:14:52,063 --> 00:14:53,257
Have you seen Lisa and Malik?
403
00:14:53,335 --> 00:14:53,841
No.
404
00:14:53,927 --> 00:14:55,591
Have you seen "The
Thin Red Line"?
405
00:14:55,682 --> 00:14:56,514
No.
406
00:14:56,592 --> 00:14:57,200
I just rented it.
407
00:14:57,277 --> 00:14:58,879
It really is
emotionally riveting.
408
00:15:07,696 --> 00:15:08,677
Hey, Dalia.
409
00:15:09,065 --> 00:15:09,814
Whoa.
410
00:15:10,078 --> 00:15:11,050
Yeah, whoa.
411
00:15:11,131 --> 00:15:11,811
Exactly.
412
00:15:11,887 --> 00:15:12,410
Whoa.
413
00:15:12,484 --> 00:15:13,466
You guys can't be here.
414
00:15:13,544 --> 00:15:15,805
The fire marshal just came and
said we're at full intensity.
415
00:15:15,890 --> 00:15:17,787
So what are you guys saying?
416
00:15:17,868 --> 00:15:19,773
Go home, ladies.
417
00:15:19,886 --> 00:15:23,488
- I'm not a la--
- Pick your battles, Malik.
418
00:15:25,924 --> 00:15:27,517
Wakey, wakey!
419
00:15:28,923 --> 00:15:30,334
Time to freshen up.
420
00:15:30,718 --> 00:15:31,545
George.
421
00:15:32,331 --> 00:15:34,240
Georgie.
422
00:15:34,666 --> 00:15:35,855
Time to wake up.
423
00:15:35,923 --> 00:15:36,580
Aah!
424
00:15:36,714 --> 00:15:37,994
George?
425
00:15:39,438 --> 00:15:40,230
George!
426
00:15:41,119 --> 00:15:42,416
George Altman!
427
00:15:42,789 --> 00:15:43,766
George Altman, where are you?!
428
00:15:48,207 --> 00:15:50,867
I left as soon as
I got your text.
429
00:15:50,957 --> 00:15:51,883
Are you okay?
430
00:15:51,962 --> 00:15:52,605
Drive!
431
00:15:53,908 --> 00:15:54,775
Go!
Faster!
432
00:15:54,869 --> 00:15:56,046
I'm going as fast as I can!
433
00:15:56,133 --> 00:15:57,267
It's a residential zone, George.
434
00:15:57,356 --> 00:15:59,409
I got two speeding
tickets here last month.
435
00:16:00,716 --> 00:16:02,078
Hey, hey.
436
00:16:02,562 --> 00:16:04,165
Hey, call me.
437
00:16:04,490 --> 00:16:05,571
I can fix that.
438
00:16:05,928 --> 00:16:06,568
Hmm?
439
00:16:07,252 --> 00:16:08,824
Hey, you have an overbite.
440
00:16:08,919 --> 00:16:10,113
Call me.
441
00:16:10,441 --> 00:16:11,255
Oh, excuse me.
442
00:16:11,576 --> 00:16:12,519
Oh, jackpot!
443
00:16:13,605 --> 00:16:14,331
Look at those chompers.
444
00:16:14,404 --> 00:16:15,200
Are you from Wales?
445
00:16:15,289 --> 00:16:16,483
Call me.
446
00:16:22,025 --> 00:16:24,527
- Hey, have you--
- I don't care if the pony is tired.
447
00:16:24,620 --> 00:16:26,142
That thing is not going
back to the farm.
448
00:16:26,231 --> 00:16:27,474
What?
449
00:16:27,731 --> 00:16:29,206
Have you seen Malik and Lisa?
450
00:16:29,285 --> 00:16:30,773
Not since I sent them home.
451
00:16:30,860 --> 00:16:32,299
You sent my friends home?
452
00:16:32,392 --> 00:16:34,785
Yeah, they weren't really part
of my vision for this party.
453
00:16:34,892 --> 00:16:37,697
It's my party!
454
00:16:37,793 --> 00:16:39,876
Then leave and go find
your lame friends.
455
00:16:39,955 --> 00:16:40,816
I don't care.
456
00:16:40,957 --> 00:16:42,104
Hello.
457
00:16:42,520 --> 00:16:48,019
We're Average Shelf Life, and this is
for the birthday girl, Tessa Faltman.
458
00:16:48,988 --> 00:16:51,275
- He said my name...
- Happy Birthday, Tessa!
459
00:16:51,376 --> 00:16:52,152
Practically.
460
00:17:00,705 --> 00:17:02,961
♪ If I had a radio ♪
461
00:17:03,079 --> 00:17:06,044
♪ for every time
you loved me so ♪
462
00:17:06,197 --> 00:17:10,148
♪ I wouldn't have
a radio at all ♪
463
00:17:12,468 --> 00:17:15,701
- ♪ now I sit and waste my time ♪
- I love you!
464
00:17:15,789 --> 00:17:22,476
♪ My room is quiet as a mime and
wait for someone glamorous to call ♪
465
00:17:25,107 --> 00:17:26,043
♪ Radio ♪
466
00:17:26,124 --> 00:17:27,016
This music sucks.
467
00:17:27,099 --> 00:17:29,038
♪ Radio, radio ♪
468
00:17:31,345 --> 00:17:31,776
Aah!
469
00:17:31,877 --> 00:17:32,388
Aah!
470
00:17:32,916 --> 00:17:33,494
Oh, I'm sorry.
471
00:17:33,593 --> 00:17:34,543
Do you want me to slow down?
472
00:17:34,622 --> 00:17:35,947
No, no, no.
473
00:17:36,025 --> 00:17:36,710
Just get there.
474
00:17:36,780 --> 00:17:38,280
I don't want to miss the party.
475
00:17:39,359 --> 00:17:40,240
It's Sheila.
476
00:17:40,304 --> 00:17:40,901
Don't answer that!
477
00:17:40,970 --> 00:17:42,655
Hey, don't answer that, okay?
478
00:17:42,741 --> 00:17:47,251
She-- That woman was trying to kill me,
just like she killed Tom Jesperson.
479
00:17:48,330 --> 00:17:49,332
Oh, no, no, no.
480
00:17:49,401 --> 00:17:51,504
She didn't kill old
man Jesperson.
481
00:17:51,581 --> 00:17:53,244
He was 94 when he bit it.
482
00:17:53,316 --> 00:17:54,831
I just like messing with her.
483
00:17:54,909 --> 00:17:55,503
Ohh.
484
00:17:55,582 --> 00:17:57,768
Dallas, you can't make those
kind of jokes around a man
485
00:17:57,845 --> 00:18:00,082
taking leftover
hysterectomy medication.
486
00:18:00,161 --> 00:18:01,018
Aah!
487
00:18:01,074 --> 00:18:02,242
Are you sure you don't
want me to slow down?
488
00:18:02,312 --> 00:18:03,450
No, just keep going.
489
00:18:03,575 --> 00:18:04,522
Aah!
490
00:18:04,626 --> 00:18:07,336
♪ Hurricane, hurricane ♪
491
00:18:07,442 --> 00:18:08,531
Tessa!
492
00:18:09,012 --> 00:18:12,013
There's lots of heads, lots
of heads I in this piece.
493
00:18:12,154 --> 00:18:13,578
Ow!
494
00:18:19,083 --> 00:18:19,922
Noah was right.
495
00:18:20,002 --> 00:18:25,217
There were a lot of heads, but none of
those heads were my friends'... heads.
496
00:18:25,759 --> 00:18:27,431
Could I have felt any worse?
497
00:18:29,864 --> 00:18:30,642
All right.
498
00:18:30,849 --> 00:18:33,665
This next one's about the
dangers of surrounding yourself
499
00:18:33,744 --> 00:18:36,399
with phony people who
aren't your friends.
500
00:18:36,481 --> 00:18:37,571
Apparently, I could.
501
00:18:40,127 --> 00:18:42,672
♪ Here come the mannequins ♪
502
00:18:42,784 --> 00:18:45,891
♪ avert your eyes,
avert your eyes ♪
503
00:18:45,979 --> 00:18:48,121
♪ tall and cruel and terrible ♪
504
00:18:48,193 --> 00:18:48,864
Tessa, wait.
505
00:18:48,945 --> 00:18:49,894
Don't try and stop me.
506
00:18:49,998 --> 00:18:51,345
I'm going after my friends.
507
00:18:51,594 --> 00:18:52,333
Nobody cares.
508
00:18:52,413 --> 00:18:53,242
Take our picture.
509
00:18:53,379 --> 00:18:57,541
♪ ...And me, they're an
awful sight to see ♪
510
00:18:57,806 --> 00:18:58,886
Smile.
511
00:18:59,003 --> 00:19:01,463
♪ As they orchestrate
the symphony ♪
512
00:19:03,134 --> 00:19:04,767
♪ Whoo ♪
513
00:19:05,058 --> 00:19:06,211
That's a keeper.
514
00:19:08,992 --> 00:19:10,340
George?
515
00:19:10,519 --> 00:19:11,314
What are you doing here?
516
00:19:11,390 --> 00:19:12,121
Hey!
517
00:19:12,210 --> 00:19:13,107
I made it.
518
00:19:13,199 --> 00:19:13,679
Mwah.
519
00:19:13,749 --> 00:19:14,943
I made it to your birthday.
520
00:19:15,009 --> 00:19:15,659
Can you believe it?
521
00:19:15,733 --> 00:19:16,634
Look at this place.
522
00:19:16,702 --> 00:19:17,429
It's amazing.
523
00:19:17,515 --> 00:19:18,490
Whoa!
524
00:19:18,579 --> 00:19:19,247
Oh!
525
00:19:21,227 --> 00:19:22,295
Yeah, it's great.
526
00:19:22,368 --> 00:19:22,966
Let's get out of here.
527
00:19:23,039 --> 00:19:23,531
Wait.
528
00:19:23,590 --> 00:19:24,425
Honey, what's wrong?
529
00:19:24,494 --> 00:19:25,341
Don't you like your band?
530
00:19:25,420 --> 00:19:27,096
I like my friends more.
531
00:19:29,136 --> 00:19:30,449
Let's go, George.
532
00:19:34,096 --> 00:19:35,435
See, George?
533
00:19:35,537 --> 00:19:39,859
This is all I wanted-- Pizza,
a couple of friends.
534
00:19:39,956 --> 00:19:41,939
Why couldn't you
just listen to me?
535
00:19:42,027 --> 00:19:42,728
I tried.
536
00:19:42,803 --> 00:19:44,942
I-I just-- I couldn't hear you
through all the ear hair.
537
00:19:45,021 --> 00:19:46,132
Gift time!
538
00:19:56,092 --> 00:19:57,032
Whoa.
539
00:19:59,050 --> 00:20:02,091
- These are--
- Diamonds!
540
00:20:07,012 --> 00:20:08,263
Thank you?
541
00:20:09,445 --> 00:20:10,627
You're welcome.
542
00:20:12,295 --> 00:20:16,638
They say diamonds are a girl's best
friend, but in my case, it wasn't true.
543
00:20:18,389 --> 00:20:19,770
These nerds were.
544
00:20:21,776 --> 00:20:23,649
I felt close to the
diamonds, also, though.
545
00:20:28,811 --> 00:20:30,114
Are you gonna embarrass me now?
546
00:20:30,342 --> 00:20:31,228
Maybe.
547
00:20:31,965 --> 00:20:32,772
Maybe?
548
00:20:33,308 --> 00:20:34,050
Dad.
549
00:20:34,815 --> 00:20:35,435
Come on.
550
00:20:35,522 --> 00:20:36,481
You're only 16 once.
551
00:20:36,560 --> 00:20:38,762
We still need to have our
father-daughter dance.
552
00:20:38,936 --> 00:20:39,632
Let's go.
553
00:20:41,015 --> 00:20:44,398
Uh... I think that's
just at weddings.
554
00:20:44,576 --> 00:20:46,198
I may not make it
to your wedding.
555
00:20:47,144 --> 00:20:49,482
I was born 9 million years ago.
556
00:20:49,578 --> 00:20:50,001
Mm.
557
00:20:50,589 --> 00:20:52,725
Look how cute you two are.
558
00:20:53,399 --> 00:20:54,364
♪ Apple of my eye ♪
559
00:20:54,488 --> 00:20:57,562
♪ don't know when, and
I don't know why ♪
560
00:20:57,929 --> 00:21:00,290
♪ You're the only reason ♪
561
00:21:00,428 --> 00:21:03,474
♪ I keep on coming home ♪
562
00:21:04,274 --> 00:21:07,009
Sync and corrections by n17t01
www.addic7ed.com
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