Original subtitles

Mail call!

What the heck are these?

Eh, just a few more copyright Infringement letters.

I'll take those!

# Do-dee-do, do, do-dee-doot #

And a letter for... Ling-Ling.

# Ling-Ling into bat... #

Yay!

Oh no! Father tried to kill himself.

Why father do such thing?

What's that troiental saying?

I can't read it.

Something about an all-new daily show.

I do like that jon stewart.

Hey, would you guys mind signing for your neighbor's package?

Someone finally bought that house, huh?

Yeah. Some greeks moved in.

Did you hear that?

Greeks! Next door!

Back in college I would have joined a fraternity

if not for one small incident.

So, you're the president of the fraternity, huh?

Yeah...

I guess I'm the president now!

Actually, as vice president

I'm the new president.

Later, you gay independents.

I'm gonna rush me a frat.

I think the mailman meant an immigrant family from Greece moved in,

not a fraternity.

And that wasn't a roofie, Captain Hero.

That was a tic-tac.

Are you guys going to fuck me or not?

ianOnTheNet

Spanky Team watchit-v2.info

Ling Palace 1234 LoMain Street

Father why? You have so much to live for.

Oh, nothing bring me joy.

I too old to battle,

and my cataract make karaoke impossible.

Uh...

You should be happy, Ling-Ling. After Jun-Jee die,

you inherit his billions!

Ling-Ling no want your money.

Ling-Ling want you happy.

Come back to Drawn Together house with me.

Move in with shameful son? Ha!

But father,

I am only son

and you must...

Oh, I do like Jon Stewart, son.

OK, I move into ill-defined parody house with you.

Yeah!

Hello! my name is Captain Hero.

I just wanted to introduce myself

and tell you that you guys have the most awesome house!

Oh, yes, well, thank you. We are very happy here.

Listen, we are just sitting down to dinner,

so, uh, thank you for the stopping by.

Dude, I am total pledge material!

- Excuse me... - Why, did you fart?

Social!

Will you be my big brother?

Party foul. Dead arm!

Dude, I snarfed!

That should be my pledge name. Snarf!

Ooh, let's play Ooky Pita!

Snarf go first.

Please, scary man, get out of our house

and never come back.

What?

You don't want me in your house?

Just please do leave us.

Ta da! Welcome to new

honorable home, honorable father.

I wish I was dead.

Oh, look! Another sick parent.

Just stack him in the corner with the rest of them.

Hey, Foxxy.

When are you gonna contribute to the parent pile?

When my daddy get back from buyin' them cigarettes.

[ Foxxy's father be gone clock ]

Ling-Ling thought new home would make Father happy.

Cameras everywhere,

obscure cartoon characters,

smells like urine.

this just like Tokyo Disneyland!

Ahhhh, but Ling-Ling was wrong.

You are great embarrassment to family name.

I am ashamed to call you Ling-Ling hitler Bin Laden Seacrest.

Who the hiroshima is that?

You mean Toot-san?

Oh, Jun-Jee wouldn't mind sweeping that leg chubby.

Cannonball!

Oh, I am such a loser!

Oh, sweetie,

I know It never feels good to be rejected.

Even when it's by an immigrant greek family

that you've mistaken for a college frat.

I know, but I still don't get why they didn't want me as a pledge.

Maybe I didn't showcase all my positive attributes,

like my ability to spot a toupee.

There's one!

You don't need them, Captain Hero.

You've got all the friends you need right here.

You're right, Xandir.

I don't need their fraternity

if I start my own!

Oh, fuck me.

Here's to starting the biggest, bestest,

drunkiest driviest, vehicular manslaughteriest

get-off-with-a-slap-on-the-wrist- because-our-dads are-the-richiest

fraternity on campus.

That wasn't a roofie, Captain Hero.

It was some candy made by willy wonka.

# Goofy roofies, buggery-boo #

Line up!

You maggots are the worst pledges in the history of this fraternity.

Sir, sorry, sir!

Thousands of committed brothers have passed through these doors.

Look at them. Look at them!

Sir, looking, sir.

They were all like family to me.

Well, except one.

Now drop and give me 20 plies!

Sir, yes, sir!

Now, pledges, as you know,

we are the coolest fraternity on campus.

but the fraternity next door

thinks they're even cooler than us.

Should we let them get away with that?

Sir, no, sir!

Then let's teach those assholes a lesson.

Charge!

Good one!

Panty raid!

# I come home in the morning light #

# my mother says when you gonna live your life right #

# Mother dear, we're not the fortunate ones #

# and girls, they want to have fun #

# Oh, girls... # - Yee-haw!

Ai-yi-yi-yi-yi!

Your kind ain't welcome here no more.

Hello, 9-1-1?

This is the Georgiopoulos...

No, we're not taking anymore pledges.

Will you please just send someone over?

# In your loud eyes #

# I feel the heat # # Brown eyes #

# Of tiny feet... #

Oh, Toot-san, you have stolen my heart.

I'm not that fat, old man!

[ Napalm ]

Excuse me! Pardon me!

Pardon me!

Father, forget about fat house monster.

But she have such beautiful, tiny feet.

Those are her nipples dragging on floor.

There must be something a beauty like that would want from an old, dying,

prone-to-changing-his-will billionaire like me.

Billionaire!

Why didn't you just say so?

Interested in sticking your John McCain into my Hanoi Hilton?

These invites will get you 2 sweet things

to the front of the line for tonight's party.

Clothing is totally optional.

That's probably my uncle with the keg!

Mr. Hero, your new neighbors have issued a restraining order against you,

some queer in a peter pan outfit, and a talking banana.

Shenanigans like that will get us kicked off campus.

You two are gone!

But where will the fraternity get its potassium?

Those dildos next door went to the dean.

They're trying to make us even lamer than that lame frat down the street!

Do a keg stand, Mishe!

Mishe! Mishe! Mishe!

We're not going to let them destroy us,

Are we, plebes?

Sir, never, sir!

And to prove it, Xandir, lock yourself in the trunk of a car

with this bottle of whiskey, and don't come out until it's empty.

Sir, yes, sir!

And wooldoor, you tie one end of this rope

around your penis, and the other around this brick,

and then throw it over the balcony.

Sir, thank you for making my wish come true, sir!

There goes one brave kid.

Now that the pledges were showing some real house pride,

It was time to get our revenge on our rival fraternity

with the greatest prank of them all.

We shall steal their mascot!

It's not so bad.

Stop screwing around, plebe.

We have got a mascot to steal.

If we do this,

I will have accomplished almost every goal

I have ever set for myself.

Bathroom, camels, goat...

and the sek-us.

Man alive! That is one hairy goat!

Sir, i think that might not be a goat at all.

It looks more like a little girl, sir.

You are such a freshman.

Why would a fraternity have a little girl as a mascot?

3 demerits!

Pledge, Xandir,

you can tell she's a goat, right?

Oh, yes. She's a goat all right.

This will be the greatest fraternity prank ever!

Heeyah, Toot-san.

You stay away from Father!

You use sex appeal to get his money!

Hey! Who I sleep with is my business!

and getting you the best deal on a new or used chevy is his business!

Yee-haw!

Maybe we should just try to get along.

I would suggest you start kissing my ass.

After all,

I am gonna be your new mother.

Did I mention I have a fat ass?

Ma'am,

I know this is difficult.

but do you remember anything

about the sandwich I asked you to make for me?

Oh, this is going way better than i expected.

Hello, campus security.

Can I help you?

Yes, i don't know if you've heard, but little Georgina's been abducted.

The goat's name is Georgina.

That is so gay!

Perhaps being a super hero who lives right next door,

you've noticed someone suspicious in the area?

Oh, no, sir.

We haven't seen any baaaa-d guys around here.

Well, if you happen to see anything, let us know.

Phi Alpha Gamma! Phi Alpha Gamma!

We're really good at thinking of chants!

- Uh... - Um...

- Um... - Uh...

OK, not that good. Wait, i've got one!

No, that's stupid.

Father Stop!

Can't you find a wife in Asia?

A smaller one...

that's more fuel efficiebt?

I now pronounce you

husband and wife.

You may now roll the bride's fat face in flour

and kiss the wet spot.

Ooh! The spot.

No!

[ Gasoline ]

Oh, pardon me, schmucky woman starting to sell real estate

in a desperate attempt to create a career for herself

way too late in life because her husband dumped her sorry ass,

but... Did our neighbors move?

I'm afraid so.

Huzzah!

I guess after their daughter was kidnapped,

never to be found, they gave up on their american dream

and moved back to Greece.

Daughter?

Kidnapped and...

Wait a second.

Wait a second!

So, she's the daughter of a greek family,

not the goat mascot of a greek fraternity.

Doesn't this beat all?

Come on. Talk about embarrassing.

Oh, Xandir's not gonna believe this!

Oh, my god.

Sir! You're a fucking idiot, sir!

Stanley?

Sorry, barbara. I need someone who makes me feel passion,

not just some desperate middle-aged hag.

You want to join us in here?

Oh, Stanley.

This is the best I deserve.

Anna Nicole parody eating all Ling-Ling inheritence.

Hey, sugar pie!

So Ling-Ling hire big Jew lawyers.

Toot braunstein,

we have this court order to stop you

from spending the Jun-Jee's money.

He my father.

Ling-Ling deserve money, not you...

filthy srut!

Hey, i'm no slut!

I earned this money!

I've been letting Jun-Jee ram his tank into my Tian'anmen square!

Sadly, he always ignores the little student.

I don't care!

It's Ling-Ling money!

- No, it's my money! - It's Ling-Ling money!

- It's my money! - It's Ling-Ling money!

- It's my money! - Duck season!

Silence!

Husband!

How long have you been standing there?

Long enough.

Ling-Ling, you do not deserve inheritance.

and you, Toot, you no love Jun-Jee.

You just marry me for money.

So, Jun-Jee decide no one get his fortune.

Yoko Ono!

Yoo-hoo ho ho!

Jun-Jee spend it all

on only dream Jun-Jee have left:

I buy ticket on space shuttle to moon!

Peace out, y'all!

Say, Herb, did you get your nose straightened?

Yeah, now nobody can tell I'm a jew.

So, I guess as it turns out,

You're not actually a goat.

Foxxy gots to keep a closer eye on you retards.

I know, I know.

This is totally the kind of crap

that makes you lose your charter.

Well, I learned my lesson.

Kids, don't do something you know is wrong

just to be accepted into some cool club.

And I guess I have learned

that not everything with hair on it is a goat.

Which would mean...

That's right, Captain Hero!

your leg is not a goat.

What do we do with little Georgina?

We got to get her back to her family.

We gots to go to Greece!

Road trip!

Off the weave, ho!

And so, we began our journey to Greece

to reunite yet another war-torn family.

I had always dreamed of going to Greece.

I only hoped it was as beautiful as it looked in the movies.

Grease!

It's amazing.

It's beautiful!

It's the word!

Come on, Ling-Ling.

We have to go to NASA and stop your father.

We can't let him give away all my money!

Leave me alone, Mommy.

Please?

I can't get there alone.

I need someone to hold the stick

with the ho ho In front of me.

What do you guys think?

Dude, your money. I would go.

Don't leave.

He'll kill me.

Fine! Ling-Ling help,

but only if we split it...

fifty-fifty.

You want half my ho ho?

I should kill you where you stand!

Nooooooooo...

Half of father's fortune.

OK. That's fair. Let's go.

Hey! You have to shake it a little.

My eyes are attracted to motion.

First, Jun-Jee check control panel.

Yes. it looks like everything set

to go straight ahead into space.

Jun-Jee ready for launch.

T-minus two minutes to raunch.

Father! No!

Don't do it!

Honey, this is no way to spend my money!

It not your money.

And trip to moon make Jun-Jee happy.

Oh Father, don't you see?

You don't need trip to moon...

or sex with fat monstre.

to be happy.

All you need...

All you need is love.

You're right.

There is always something better coming up next.

I don't need to blow fortune on trip to moon.

Besides, space turns asians into queers.

That only explanation for George Takei.

Let's go, number one son.

T-minus 11...

- 10... - Wait!

- 9... - Help!

- 8... 7... - I'm stuck! I'm stuck!

6, 5...

God damn it!

2, 1...

Oh, my!

Oh, my yourself!

There go Mr. Georgiopoulos with them pink ladies.

Sir, you are just gonna laugh when you hear what happened.

Georgina?! Is that you?

Daaaa-d!

Oh, my sweet, sweet daughter!

Oh, thank you, mighty Thor!

Once again, Captain Hero has saved the day!

Honey, did that man hurt you?

Did he touch you?

Hey, ho!

Like, what the hell did you do to George's kid?

Greased lightning! Sandy! Whoa.

# Fraternity pledging #

# had me a blast #

# I was sleeping #

# Happened so fast #

# I grabbed the goat #

# and ran for my life #

# I tried to scream #

# but he had a knife #

# Kidnapping #

# Oh, what a fling #

# Whoa, yeah, those pledging days #

# Tell us what happened next #

# Did you tie her up in chains? #

# Did he have a big stick? #

# Did you slap her around? #

# Did he make you suck his #

# big balls #

# Oh, yeah #

# Mother-freaking balls #

# Kidnapping #

# Oh, what a fling #

# Whoa, yeah #

# Those pledging... ahh #

# days #

www.tvsubtitles.net