Original subtitles

- Man, narrating: There was

no emotion in my blood.

There was no anger.

There was nothing.

It was dead silence in my brain.

Dead, cold quiet.

He looked at me...

he walked past me...

and then I heard my head.

It said, "do it, do it, do it,

do it," over and over again.

[Distorted screaming,

overlapping sounds]

The catcher in the rye of my generation, chapter 27.

[Distorted screaming,

tape rewinding...]

My whole life has pointed in one direction.

I can see that now.

There has never been any choice for me.

You never find your identity by looking for it.

They

say that the united states has

had its day in the sun, that our

nation has passed its zenith...

they expect you to tell your

children that the American

people no longer have the will

to cope with their problems,

that the future will be one of

sacrifice and few opportunities.

My fellow citizens, I utterly reject that view.

Hey, man, you're late.

- I thought you weren't in

till Monday.

- Boss called... Arthur's ill... new guy ain't here yet.

- You're kidding.

It's almost 11:30.

- I know.

I've been here since 7.

...will get things under way there in the

music hall...

- What's going on over there?

Good evening...

- Someone jammed gum

in the locks.

- Animals. - That's what I said.

- Next Tuesday is election day.

Before going to the polls,

voters want to understand

the issues.

You called in?

- It's all yours.

- Voters will have an

opportunity to see and hear the

major party candidates for the

presidency state their views on

issues that affect us all.

The candidates

will debate questions on

domestic, economic, foreign

policy and national security

issues.

The questions are going to be

posed by a panel of

distinguished journalists who

are here with me.

...they are: Marvin stone, the

editor of u.s. News & world

report...

- Yes, hello?

Hello?

Bang-bang,

you're dead.

- Hello?

- Twelve hours of work

and I still can't sleep.

The days go on and on...

and they don't end.

My body fights me, always.

It won't sleep, it won't eat.

The headaches are getting worse.

[Indistinct voice and singing

on radios...]

Thank you,

me too.

Hey... mark. - Mother...

- Hey.

- What are you doing?

- Well, it's very nice to see

you too, mark.

- Everything o.k. Over here?

- Oh, yeah, sure,

everything's fine.

This is Makana.

Makana, this is mark.

Mark is an old--

- I'm her son.

Oh... you...

Don't listen to him.

I was really never much of a

mother to him, we were more like

best friends.

Weren't we, mark?- Mmm.

- Mind you, where we come from,

sometimes that's one

and the same.

Makana's gonna take me surfin'.

Bye!

My mother was a

dreamer... moody... right out of

glass menagerie.

She was afraid of getting old

and said she'd commit suicide

when she turned 50.

She felt romantic about

Charles Boyer, but remote

from my father.

I don't think I ever hugged

my father.

He never told me he loved me and

he never said he was sorry.

My mother always said he

couldn't show these kinds of

things, couldn't show any kind

of emotional love.

One time, he pushed my head

in a plate of spaghetti.

Sometimes I fantasized about

getting a gun and blowing

him away.

She said she only married him

to have me.

Why?

Normal kids don't grow up

to shoot ex-Beatles.

All my life needed was a sense

of someplace to go.

I don't believe you should

devote your life to morbid

self-attention.

I believe that one should become

a person like other people.

I was starting to hate people.

The slightest rebuff or

rejection would send me

into a frenzy.

Bang-bang, you're dead.

Bang-bang, you're dead.

...i began withdrawing

from the world.

I was losing everything

I cared about.

...Things used

to be o.k.

...I just don't know

if I can...

if I can keep up, o.k.?

If I can keep up with

everything... everything,

you know?

You... mom... my job... I can't come down.

In my head, I can't come down!

I feel like a victim right now, o.k.?

I just feel like I have no

control over my world...

over ourworld, you know, and I need you.

I need you to understand!

Do you understand?

Understand me, please!

- We know it's you.

- Yeah?

- If you persist

in harassing...

- Oh, come on.

- If you persist in harassing us, you'll be served with

a restraining order.

- Yeah, and what the fuck do you think this is?

You get people to buy into

this crap and then you screw their savings.

- No. - And then you force them to

take out a second mortgage.

- This is your last warning.

- And we of the church believe

that the laws of god forbid man to destroy his own kind.

- Correct. - To destroy the sanity of another.

- Correct.

- To destroy or enslave another soul.

- If you persist, we'll call

the police and inform

the medical authorities.

I'm sure you don't want to go

back to the hospital.

Castle memorial mental

health clinic.

June 21st, 1977.

- A science fiction writer

is not a god.

You're not a religion.

...my life was either happiness

or despair.

I had no stable sense

of self-esteem.

I felt I was nothing, a nobody.

I took refuge in public places.

I loved the library.

I loved the smell of books.

All that learning.

It's the essence

of something orderly.

Miss Blakeslee taught me

the value of books.

Thurber... ogden nash...

once a month she brought us in

and taught us how to use

the library.

I volunteered as an assistant.

Things you like as a child stay

with you for life.

I was searching for some kind of

guidance... a mission...

and for my sins, I found one.

I hadn't read it since I was 16.

Now it burned in my hand.

It was like an electric current

passing through my body,

lighting up all the cells

in my brain.

Here was something I could

identify with, an unphoney way

of life.

And the more I read, the more

I saw myself in its pages.

I was actually becoming its

hero, holden Caulfield.

I started reading the catcher in

the ryeand I couldn't put it

down until I got to the end.

And then I read it again.

And I held it between my hands

and I put it against my face

and I inhaled deeply.

And I read it again, drinking in

the aroma that's sort of...

Antiseptic smell...

...between my nostrils and my

skin, drinking in the aroma...

that sort of antiseptic smell...

...my nostrils and my skin...

a way to live an honest life,

an unphoney way of life is a way

that I can identify with.

I remember my mind

is disheveled.

It's ripped and torn.

There is a tornado in my mind,

circling around my brain.

Bits and pieces crashing into

the walls.

The debris.

Broken things, cloudy things... things I can't see.

...well?

I don't see much point in it.

- You realize this is one of

the most brilliant studies of

adolescence ever written?

- He sounds a mess to me.

- Of course he's a mess, but he realizes he's a mess.

He tries to express what he feels.

He's a human being

for all his faults.

- I don't like the way he talks.

- I don't like the way you

talk, but I listen.

- I suppose it's very clever,

the way he writes and all.

- Gloria, I gave you the book

because I thought you would

identify with him... with me.

I'm holden Caulfield.

He doesn't fit anywhere

and I don't.

Don't you even read books?

- I read books.

- No, not magazines and travel

brochures and books about Japan,

but realbooks, realbooks with emotions and real people.

- Yes, I do, actually.

And who says Japan doesn't have real people?

- Well, Japan... you know what I mean.

That's why you need to

understand the catcher.

You need to understand holden.

If you understand holden...

how you gonna understand me?

Real books, I'm talking about

art and literature and you know,

things that people read.

Don't be so arrogant.

- I mean, don't you even

feel sorry for him?

...i was identifying with

a 16-year-old boy in a book in

New York city, and here I am,

a 25-year-old man in Hawaii who was married. ...hi.

Hi.

- I'm holden Caulfield.

He doesn't fit anywhere,

and I don't.

This is not realistic.

- Hi, honey. - I know.

Well... sometimes

I get aggravated.

- O.k., it's all right.

It's o.k.

It was a statement.

Here is my identity.

Here is where my pain is.

"I keep picturing all these

little kids playing some game in

this big field of rye and all.

Thousands of little kids,

and nobody's around...

nobody big, I mean, except me,

and I'm standing at the edge

of this crazy cliff.

What I have to do, I have

to catch everybody if they start

to go over the cliff.

I mean, if they're running and

they don't look where they're

going, I have to come out from

somewhere and catch them.

That's all I'll do all day.

I'd just stand there and be

the catcher in the rye and all.

I know it's crazy,

but that's the only thing

I'd really like to be.

I know it's crazy."

Chapter 22... page 173.

Then I found another book,

just as holden Caulfield had

bled through the ink of catcher,

John Lennon now entered my mind.

There was John Lennon

on the cover.

He was on liberty island where

the statue of liberty is.

He was right at the base of

the statue of liberty with

his glasses and cap with

the scarf around his neck,

having his photograph taken.

I looked through the book at

the pictures of John Lennon on

the gabled roof of the Dakota

building in New York.

Those photographs of him

on the roof, they entered

my mind and they took on

a life of their own.

And at some point,

after looking at those pictures,

I became enraged at him.

Something inside me just broke.

The great John Lennon, who told

us to imagine no possessions,

and there he was with millions

of dollars and yachts and farms

and country estates, laughing at

people like me who believed

all the lies and bought

all the records.

It reeked of phoniness.

Confirmation.

As soon as I saw that picture,

I knew I was going to kill him.

It was like I had been handed

something, a solution.

For the first time in years, all

my thoughts were synchronized.

It's what holden had fantasized

about in the book, killing

the big, fat guy in the hotel--

the pimp, the phoney.

- All done for the morning, sir?

- All through. - Yeah?

Pretty rough night?

- Oh, you know, the usual.

- Yeah?

Yeah.

Well... you have yourself

a good morning, sir.

- You too, good-bye.

- Good-bye, my friend.

I had found my

identity but I had lost my life.

- Mark!

Mark!

Mark!

I would sit up all

night playing Beatles records,

speeding them up, slowing them

down, interjecting my own words.

I would strip naked, gritting

my teeth and summoning the devil

and wild things in my mind.

I was sending out telegrams to

satan, "give me the opportunity

to kill John Lennon."

...i'm 25 years old.

I've made a decision.

My decision... is I'm gonna

go travel.

- You're going to abandon

your wife and your mother and

leave... go thousands of miles

away and you just want to start

with New York City, right?

- It's always about you, mother.

I'm not abandoning, I'm not.

- It's not about me. This is about you.

You're the one who married her, little, helpless little girl,

and now you're gonna go away and leave her...

: Leave her in,

under my care.

I'm supposed to...

- Well, Gloria is not under your care and Gloria is not

helpless, and neither are you.

So you take care of you.

Gloria will be fine on

her own, and I'll be back

before you know it.

- I'm not, I'm not buying it.

- Well, you don't have to buy it.

- I know when you're lying to me.

Now, if there's a real reason

why you feel the need to go back

to New York city, I want you

to tell it to me right now.

My decision... is I'm gonna

go travel.

- I don't understand the whole

thing with New York city...

- You don't have to understand!

O.k., I am just doing

what I want to do!

You don't need to understand

everything that I do!

..."The phoney must die,"

says the catcher in the rye.

"The phoney must

die," says the catcher in

the rye.

- Can I help?

- I need something for

protection at home.

- O.k., uh, anything in mind?

- What would you suggest?

- Well, if you get a .22 and

a burglar comes in, he's just

gonna laugh at you.

Handy little gun-- it's fast,

but don't do much damage.

But... if you get a .38,

nobody's gonna laugh at you.

Fine, solid gun, blue steel,

snub nose... otherwise the same

as a police service revolver.

Now, that will stop anything

that moves and it's handy,

flexible... it's lightweight,

reliable.

You know, some of these guns

are like toys, but a smith

& Wesson... you can hit somebody

over the head with it and

it'll still come back dead-on.

You can't beat quality.

You interested in an automatic?

- How much?

- With specialized grips...

169.

- O.k., I'll take it.

...hi, I'd like a ticket

to New York, one way.

So long

as you fill out a form and

the firearm and ammunition

are packed separately...

- And where do I get that form?

- At the check-in, but the gun

has to be in your luggage.

You can't take it onboard.

- And that's it?

- That's it.

- Thank you very much.

- Have a good flight.

There's a smell

in New York.

It's a scary smell and a cold

smell and I'm frightened...

frightened of someone

finding out my secret.

Gonna be in

town long?

You ever been to the city?

Where you from, bud?

They don't have traffic

like this on main street

where you live, huh?

Have you stopped to see

central park yet?

It's great this time

of the year.

A lot of snow...

- Take me where the freaks are.

- You are where the freaks are.

New York is all freaks.

You're in time square.

This is about as big as a freak

section as you're gonna get.

- You ever seen John Lennon?

- Yeah... he's around.

Seen him in town.

He lives up ahead here.

Matter of fact, he lives up

by 72nd.

- Oh, yeah, the Dakota, right?

- Right up there, that's right.

You knew that, huh?

It's right up near 72nd.

We'll be passing it in a minute.

- He's kind of a phoney,

isn't he?

- That all depends.

- On what?

- On his music or his personality.

- Maybe a little of both?

- I guess you could say that.

You don't like music?

- I did once.

- What happened?

- I found something else.

- Yeah, that happens, you know?

- How much did you say it was?

- 15.

- Here's 20.

- Happy holiday.

I checked into

the Waldorf-Astoria... just like holden.

[Indistinct voices on tv

and sound effects]

I was like a boxer in the 27th

round, all bloody and beaten.

[Indistinct police

radio chatter]

It's what holden had fantasized

about in the book, killing

the big, fat guy in the hotel...

the pimp, the phoney.

[Camera shutters click,

sirens wailing,

"Nightline" theme plays]

If you've been

anywhere near a television set,

you already know that John

Lennon of the Beatles is dead.

- Something's gonna be

happening soon.

You're gonna hear about me.

- You, uh, you famous or something?

- Oh, no, no. I'm not famous.

I just want you to be aware

that something's gonna be

happening soon.

Here, turn left here at 72nd.

- John Lennon lives

right there.

- Oh, yeah?

And you can just pull over right

up here, right around there.

- O.k.

- Right around that

truck will be fine.

- Right.

- O.k., let's see, uh...

$7.80.

- You got it, sir.

How's that?

- That's fine. Listen, you have a nice time

in New York city.

- You too. It was a pleasure meeting you.

- Pleasure meeting you too.

All right...

strange guy.

- Th... this is the Dakota,

right? - Yup.

- Where John Lennon lives?

- Yes, sir.

- Wow.

I can't believe I'm really

standing here, you know,

right outside where he lives.

Sixth floor, right?

Robert ryan's old apartment?

Can you see it?

- Not from here.

Not from here, you can't.

- You know, rosemary's baby

was shot here, wasn't it?

- I don't know.

That's what they say.

- So is, uh, is John in town?

- I don't know, man.

I don't think so.

I haven't seen him.

I think he's traveling

or something.

- I'm from Hawaii.

- Really?

That's a pretty strong accent

you got there from Hawaii.

I cased the whole building...

walked all the way around it

twice, just like

an assassin would.

When we

first moved here, we actually

lived in the village,

in greenwich village, which is

sort of the artsy-fartsy section

of town for those that don't

know, where all the students and

the would-be's live, you know,

and a few old poets and that.

She told me, "yes, you can walk

on the streets," you know.

I mean, it took me two years

to unwind.

Shooting a man

is no easy thing.

It takes a lot

of inner strength.

I can go right out

this door now and go

in a restaurant.

Do you want to know how great

that is?

Or go to the movies?

I mean, people come up and ask

for autographs or say "hi" but

they won't bug you, you know?

Don't you forget

what the Beatles have said.

Don't forget to take your Beatle

records and your Beatle

paraphernalia to any one of our

14 pick-up points in Birmingham,

Alabama, and turn them in,

this week if possible.

I had found

my identity...

but I had lost my life.

..."The phoney must die,"

says the catcher in the rye.

"The phoney must die,"

says the catcher in the rye.

"The phoney must die,"

says the catcher in the rye.

[Overlapping sounds,

muffled voices...]

One dollar here,

one dollar...

...the raging

bull... let's hear it for the

great Jake la Motta, ladies and

gentlemen!

He was a fighter...

Why does he have to make

it so hard on himself?

A winner...

A loser...

I done a lot

of bad things, Joey.

In this

typical town...

in this comfortable home...

three ordinary people are

about to live

an extraordinary story...

You know,

I used to figure you had

a handle for everything...

you knew it all...

and I know that wasn't fair,

but you always made us feel like

everything was gonna be

all right.

I really admire you for it.

- Oh, don't admire people

too much.

They'll disappoint

you sometimes.

- I love you.

I love you too.

I had an experience

in that theater.

Somehow, in that brief time,

my rage against John Lennon

was defeated.

A volcano was capped.

I realized I had a wife at home

who loved me.

...Gloria, hi, it's me.

I'm comin' home.

I've won a great victory.

Your love has saved me.

I was gonna kill him but your

love saved me.

You know what I'm talking about.

Gloria, listen... just listen.

I was gonna kill...

John Lennon, but our paths

didn't cross.

...you don't believe me.

I even got to know the doorman

where Lennon lives.

I could have done it.

Your love has saved me, Gloria.

I just want to come back home

to you, no one else,

there's no one else.

I made such a big mistake

coming here.

But I could have done it.

I really could have done it.

...i lied to my wife.

I told her I threw away the gun

in the ocean, which I didn't.

I told her it was over...

it wasn't.

16 days later, I was back.

I told my wife I was going

to find a new career.

[Traffic passing, siren blares

in the distance,

people talking...]

Heavenly treasures

are what the spirit

of god gives...

and so the poor people also have

the spirit of god in them...

well, that's what I'm saying...

that, that's what

the antichrist said...

- Hi, you gals waitin'

for somebody?

- Well, as matter of fact,

we were waiting for you.

- It wasn't worth it.

- I'm sorry,

we're only teasing.

I'm Jude, this is Jeryl.

I know.

I heard John Lennon lives here,

I was, uh, hoping to get his

autograph-- is he around?

Have you seen him?

- Um, no, but he's somewhere

in the city.

- Good.

I'm from Hawaii.

- You came all the way

from Hawaii to see John?

- I'm a big fan.

You must be.

- Well, I'm also here

on business, and just thought

I'd take a look.

- Well, Jeryl and I

are considered family.

- Yeah, so much so that John

and Yoko call us by name.

- Yeah, sometimes they stop us

on the street to have a chat.

- Wow...

I just want an autograph.

Oh, I should have brought a book

or something!

- Oh, why don't you get

double fantasy?

Even if you don't get an

autograph, it's a great album.

- Hey, yeah,

maybe I'll do that.

They'd never believe it

back home.

- O.k., well, we're going

to go get something to eat now.

So, it was nice meeting you.

- Well, I'll be here

until at least midnight.

- Well, see you later then.

- Well, maybe we can all have

dinner tonight?

My treat!

Do you like Japanese?

- Man, whistling: Taxi!

"He was so

nice... I just can't believe

he was the one..."

...the more I found out,

the more angry I became.

The guy owned five luxury

apartments in the Dakota...

four farms in Virginia,

Vermont and upstate New York.

250 head of prize holstein

cattle worth more

than $100,000 each.

A vast weekend home in Florida.

A 63-foot ocean-going yacht. This from a man who told us

to "imagine no possessions."

...when I heard the homos next

door, I flew into a rage

inside myself.

They disgusted me.

Travis was right.

"One day a real rain will come and wash all the scum off

the street."

Frank! Frank!

George c. Scott...

- Johnny Carson...

Jackie Onassis...

On the streets, among all

the freaks and queers and bums

and whores...

I knew holden was right.

It was all very clear.

Here is a little man who has

nothing, going against

a giant phoney.

I wanted to go and shoot 'em

all... and I almost did.

But what glory is there

in killing unknowns?

In the book, holden checked out

of his miserable room

in a cheap hotel.

My $16-a-night Y.M.C.A. Full

of queers now became room 2374

at the Sheraton.

Hell to heaven in a cab ride.

Hey Trina, it's Bree...

- I could have killed those

queers, I really could have.

Yeah, listen,

I could use a quick 50.

Got a commuter for me?

...good evening.

If you'd like that...

have you ever been with a woman

before, paying her?

Do you like it?

I mean, I have the feeling

that that turns you on

very particularly.

What turns me on is because

I have a good imagination

and I like it... pleasing.

Do you mind if I take

my sweater off?

Well, I think in the confines

of one's house, one should be

free of clothing

and inhibitions.

Oh, inhibitions are always nice

because they're so nice

to overcome.

- Hi, I'd like an escort

for the evening.

Yes... someone foreign.

Do you have any foreign women?

Someone exotic.

I'd like someone

from another country.

Good...

but she's gotta be quiet.

If she doesn't talk,

I will tip her very well.

O.k.?

I'm at the Sheraton hotel,

room 2730.

Caulfield.

Holden Caulfield.

...i kept walking around

the room, waiting for this

prostitute to show up.

I kept hoping

she'd be good-looking.

I didn't care too much though.

I sort of just wanted to get it

over with.

I was startin' to feel

pretty sexy and all.

I was a little nervous anyway.

Finally, somebody knocked

on the door.

- Hi, I'm pia.

- Thank you for coming.

You can relax, I'm not kinky.

I'm clean.

I'm not weird.

In fact, I'm not even all that

interested in sex.

I just want to be in the company

of a woman tonight.

I'm expecting that tomorrow will

be a very difficult day for me.

Would you like a drink?

- I don't drink.

- Well, tonight's

your night off.

We can do whatever you want.

Take your dress off.

- Um... turn on the radio.

I think somebody saw me come in

the room... I don't...

I don't want jail.

- Of course.

Would you like a massage?

- Sure, why not?

- A real man doesn't have

to take from a woman.

A real man doesn't have

to use a woman.

He can give.

He can give.

...i woke up knowing somehow

that this was the day...

that when I left that room,

that would be the last time

I would see the room again.

I had never seen John Lennon

up to that point.

I only knew that he was

in the Dakota...

but... I somehow knew that

this was it.

This was the day.

I'm holden Caulfield.

I am... holden Caulfield.

Iam holden Caulfield.

Hello, I'm holden Caulfield.

I'mholden Caulfield.

So I laid out on the dresser

a tableau of everything that was

important in my life.

So it would say,

"look, this is me.

This is my past, and I'm going,

gone to another place."

I practiced what it was gonna

look like when the police came

into the room.

It was like going through a door

and I knew I was going

to go through a door.

The poet's door.

William blake's door.

Jim morrison's door.

It was like I was going

through a giant door...

and I was.

I was leaving my past.

My very soul was breathing

between the pages of

the catcher in the rye.

Give me

the strength.

Please... give me

the strength to do it.

It has to be done.

Please give me the strength.

The phonies have to know.

- Hey man, how's it goin'?

- Hey, how's it going?

- All right, right.

You stayin' warm out here?

- I'm trying. - Yeah.

Hey, have you seen anybody today?

- No, I haven't. - No?

- Been quiet?

- Yeah, nobody's come out.

Jose... hey man.

- What's goin' on?

- How are ya? - Good.

Hi.

- Hey, I'm mark. - I'm Paul.

- How are ya? - All right, how are you?

- Good.

So you guys seen Lennon yet?

- No, I haven't. - No, we were just talking about that.

- He hasn't been out.

- You're a photographer?

- Oh, yeah.

- You get pictures of him?

- Oh, yeah, all the time.

- Wow, that's great.

- Yeah, it's pretty cool.

So, uh... you new in town?

- Uh... yeah, I'm on vacation.

I'm from Hawaii, Honolulu.

- Really? - Yup.

- I didn't realize people from

Honolulu had a southern drawl.

Where are you staying in New York?

- Why'd you ask me that?

What the hell do you wanna know that for?

No, don't walk away-- why do you

want to know where I'm staying in New York?

- Easy, man-- take it easy.

I'm only making conversation.

You're the one who started it...

right?

- Sorry.

- Well, that was weird.

- Yeah...

that's New York.

- Well... looks like it's down

to us die-hard Beatleholics now.

Look, I'm sorry if I came on

a little strong.

I've been standing out here

for nearly three days now.

- You strike up a conversation

with a guy like he's your long

lost cousin and then you get

all hostile.

- I... I'm bored and I'm far

away from home, so I try

to talk to people for

a little companionship.

I'm tired... so I guess that's

why I flew off the handle.

I'm sorry, o.k.?

- O.k.

Hey, relax. No one's gonna steal your album

around here.

...you get a lot of shots of John?

- Oh, yeah, all the time.

Hey, here he comes.

Thanks, John.

Is that good?

Anything else?

- Thanks. - You're welcome.

Thanks, John.

Cheers.

- Oh, you lucked out big time.

That's pretty special.

Big stars don't usually put the date.

- Wow. - That's a collector's item.

- You know, wait until they see

this back in Hawaii.

Did you get any of me?

- I think so. - I'll give you anything

for that picture, anything.

Did I have my hat on

or was it off?

I-I don't want to be standing

next to John Lennon

with this stupid hat on.

Was it on or off?

- I think it was on.

- Shit! Uh... listen, is there any way

you could get me that picture tonight?

I'll give you $50 for it.

- I live in new jersey.

- O.k., meet me here tomorrow

and I'll give you $50-- deal?

- O.k.

Jesus.

Wait until they see that picture

back in Hawaii.

Hell, me... standing next

to John Lennon.

Hoo!

- That's it, I'm gone.

Good luck.

- You know, I-I-I'm staying

at the Sheraton.

Like I said, you can't be too

careful, especially in a city

like this.

I mean, you never know

who you're talking to.

You know, I'm not from Hawaii

originally, I'm from Georgia.

I grew up just outside

of Atlanta in Decatur.

You know-- Decatur, Georgia?

I've traveled all around

the world, but Hawaii is the place I belong.

I probably wouldn't be alive

today if I hadn't moved there three years ago.

You wouldn't believe what I went there for.

I've lived

a very ironical life.

- I'll be back tomorrow night

with the picture.

- You really ought to wait.

I mean, they could be back any

minute, they'll be back

before midnight.

- Look, you got your autograph from John.

Give it up for the day

and get some rest.

- No... I'm gonna get Yoko's.

Hey, uh, uh... why don't I take your picture with him

when he comes back? I know about cameras, I've used 'em before.

- I see John all the time.

I can get my picture taken with him anytime.

I'm going home.

- Well, suppose you don't see him again?

Mr. Lennon?

- Yoko, sobbing: John...

Go, go--

get out of here!

- But where would I go?

- I don't know.

...it was like

a movie.

It was like I was in a movie.

I got a gun.

I got hollow point bullets.

I thought he would just drop

right in front of me

and that was it.

I thought he was just gonna fall

down like in the movies...

fall down dead.

Police!

Freeze! Hands on your head!

Do it! Do it now!

- Police! Don't move!

- He shot John Lennon!

[Metallic creaking,

electricity crackling...]

Come on, John.

Hold it there.

- Yeah, yeah, yes... o.k.

Come on... John, hang in.

Come on, come on.

Please,

don't hurt me.

[Police radio chatter

continues...]

...i murdered a man,

but not only did I fall,

I took a lot more with me

than just myself.

A whole era ended.

It was the last nail

in the coffin of the '60s.

[Indistinct news broadcasts

growing louder...]

...shortly

before 11 p.m.

He was dead on arrival.

- If you've been anywhere near

a television set or a radio

these past few hours,

you already know that

John Lennon of the Beatles

is dead.

He's not dead.

John Lennon can't be dead.

♪ ...take me up

♪ to the place where it's just the two of us ♪

♪ Where you say I'm beautiful... ♪

The suspect

at this time is-- first of all,

his identity, 25-year-old

mark David chapman... he comes

from Hawaii.

Police tell me he's been

in the New York area about

a week, and began to hang around

the Dakota apartment over

the weekend, asking about

John Lennon.

He apparently ran into him

for the first time this evening

about 5:00, asking Lennon

for his autograph.

Lennon gave it to him on

the jacket cover of a record.

Lennon went off to a recording

session and we are told that

chapman remained at the hotel

until mr. Lennon returned

about 11:00 this evening.

Police officials, um, describe

They say

that chapman came up

from behind, yelled out

mr. Lennon's name and emptied

a .38 revolver...

...there were at least

five shots spent...

...there is very little known

about 25-year-old chapman.

He has been taken to the 20th

police precinct, fingerprinted.

They're checking for prior

arrest records, also for

any motive.

They don't have any yet...

Hurry up in there.

- They've charged him

officially with murder,

but the reason for this attack--

unknown.

Have a seat.

O.k., calm down, all right?

I'm going to take off your

cuffs, make you a little bit

more comfortable.

[Choir sings "silent night"

faintly in background...]

State your name.

- Mark David chapman.

- Your age?

- 25.

- Your address.

- 55 Kukui street,

Honolulu, Hawaii.

- O.k., do me a favor and stand up.

I just want to check your pockets.

Have a seat, all right?

I remember a lot

of pain and a lot of confusion

when I dictated the statement.

I was in a very unreal,

very surreal world.

I was in an utter panic of sheer

terror and wanted things to go

back to the way they were before

I had pulled the trigger.

I felt anger spreading over

my mind as I was dictating

the statement and talking about

catcher in the rye, like I was

being sucked into a giant wave

that I couldn't swim out of

or even come up for air.

...i didn't wanna kill anybody.

And I really don't know why

I did it.

I asked god to help me...

but we're all responsible

for our own actions.

I came to New York

five weeks ago.

I stayed at the Y.M.C.A.

On 62nd street...

♪ ...it's not enough

♪ to close my eyes

♪ and picture my lover in life

♪ 'cause I've got a picture of you ♪

♪ But dreams won't do...

Mourners began gathering here soon after

the news of Lennon's death and there are easily now a thousand

mourners who've come to pay tribute to him.

At the beginning, it was a very solemn vigil.

Many held candles...

...up to

a thousand admirers at one time.

Lennon's wife, Yoko Ono, at one

time sent a message down asking the mourners to disperse,

and most of them did, but they are starting to return again,

playing the familiar songs that are so connected with John

Lennon and some also for the Beatles as a group.

The feeling is of tremendous loss and these people feel it

very personally.

The profound loss to the music

world is... is yet to be accounted for.

You guys all set?

Come on, look alive,

let's get going.

Move it.

- Give me a vest.

Hold him up right here.

Get the vest on him.

- Take your glasses off.

Hold your hands up.

- I'm not gonna have jack ruby

kill you in my station house,

you understand?

Come on, secure that.

All right, listen up, guys.

We got the man who shot

John Lennon here.

I don't want any Oswalds,

you got it?

- Give me a coat,

I want a coat.

- Get him a coat. No fuck-ups, you understand me?

You ready?

Move.

The door.

Move it up, all right, let's go.

Jesus christ!

Get them back-- let's go!

Move the fuck back!

I remember from

the darkness inside the coat

a tremendous tumult occurring

as we walked from one door

to another door.

I looked down...

and the ground was lit up

by white light.

It was almost like I was walking

on just one giant, pulsating

beam of light under my feet.

Move back!

- Jesus christ!

Shh.

- Culley, get on the door.

Relax.

So...

why'd you do it?

- I like John Lennon.

So do I.

- Boss, it's clear.

Let's go.

- Culley, let's go.

I was mr. Nobody

till I killed the biggest

somebody on earth.

Outside the

courtroom were many Lennon fans.

Security measures were strict

when they filed in as there've

been many threats against

chapman's life since the murder.

I was nothing...

then I was a big shot.

This was the hottest thing

in the city at the time.

Who are you?

Get out of here!

Get out of here!

Get the fuck out of here now!

Get him in the car!

Get him in the fuckin' car!

Let's go!

Let's go!

25-year-old

mark David chapman of Hawaii was

described as having a smirk

on his face.

Police, calling him a "wacko,"

charged him with murder.

John's wife, Yoko Ono, issued

a statement to the weeping crowd

of 500 who gathered quickly

outside the co-op.

She said, "John loved and prayed

for the human race.

Please do the same for him."

John Lennon and Paul McCartney

wrote more hit songs than any

composers in modern history,

and they're generally considered

to have been the spirit behind

many of the social changes

of the '60s and '70s.

- Hey, get back down there.

All I care about is getting you

out of here before someone kills

you, you understand?

At the

arraignment mark David chapman

was charged with second-degree

murder, the most serious charge

in New York state for killing

a non-law officer.

He was then taken here

to bellevue hospital

for psychiatric exams.

- Male reporter 2:

...everywhere he goes, chapman

is forced to wear two

bulletproof jackets.

The threat of a lynching

is almost too much for police.

- They fear that fans might

decide to storm the hospital.

♪ Get up, stand up

♪ Strut your funky stuff

♪ Get up, stand up

♪ Strut your funky stuff

♪ What you doin' there in the corner?♪

♪ You're like a loner

♪ Sittin' by yourself in the dark... ♪

I remember

cockroaches and

I remember filth...

and I remember a smell...

I remember loud disco music,

and I remember just a terrible

feeling of something like

a Fellini film.

- ♪ ...get up, stand up

♪ Strut your funky stuff

♪ Get up, stand up...

...and music

critic Robert palmer who

recently interviewed

John Lennon.

John Coleman, of course, will

bring us weather news this

morning, but now at 30 minutes,

almost 31, after 7:00,

Steve bell has the news.

Thank you, Stephanie.

Good morning, everyone.

New York city police have now

arrested and charged a suspect

in last night's murder

of John Lennon.

He's 25-year-old David chapman

of Hawaii who police say had

been in New York for about

a week, apparently stalking

Lennon.

The police describe chapman

as "a wacko."

They say he shot Lennon five

times as the musician returned

to his apartment last night,

then dropped his gun and waited

for police.

Authorities say they do not know

of any motive for that killing.

Informed of Lennon's death this

morning, his former songwriter

partner in the Beatles, Paul

McCartney said, "I can't take

it, John was a great guy.

He's going to be missed

by the whole world."

As June Massell reports, many of

John Lennon's fans and admirers

heard about his death on late

night radio music programs.

John Lennon will be

remembered as a gifted

and talented musician.

The Beatles were the top pop

music group in the world from

the time their first album

was released in 1964

until they broke up in 1970.

With Lennon at the time of the

shooting was his wife, Yoko Ono,

who Lennon once said helped him

find his identity.

When doctors told her Lennon was

dead, she cried, "tell me

it isn't true."

June Massell, abc news, Chicago.

I didn't care what

the doctors thought about me.

I was above and beyond them.

I was with a pure, holy purpose

and there was nothing they could

do that would touch it.

I thought they were all phonies.

I became a savior, a prophet.

The catcher in the rye

of my generation.

- Hello, mr. Chapman.

How are you?

Have you had

a comfortable night?

- I slept fine.

- Good.

Do you know where you are?

- Bellevue hospital.

- Mm-hmm, right.

- Correct.

- Why are you here?

- For the murder

of John Lennon.

- Did you kill John Lennon?

- You ought to know that.

- Yes, I do.

- Next question.

- Why did you kill John Lennon?

- Uh, that's tough to answer.

Probably, uh... a number

of different reasons.

- Let's start, I have a lot of time.

- I'm sure you do.

A lot of questions,

a lot of answers.

- You provide the answers.

I ask the questions.

So, give me one reason.

- Because I thought

he was a phoney.

- A phoney. - Mm-hmm.

- Didn't like his music,

is that it?

- No, actually,

I loved his music.

- You didn't like his lyrics?

- Well, I... I thought

I understood his lyrics,

but I guess I didn't.

- What's phoney

about John Lennon?

Have you ever thought

about death before? Killing?

- Killing... yeah, I have

thought about death,

I have thought about killing.

I just killed a man.

Is that killing enough for you?

- Do you ever think about

suicide or taking yourself out

of pain in some other way?

- Yeah, I've thought

about suicide.

I tried to wipe myself out

before I wiped John Lennon out.

- You did? - Yeah.

- And what happened?

- I couldn't do it.

I was too chicken.

- You were, huh?

- Yeah, went up on top of the

empire state building... and...

wanted to blow my brains out.

- Why is that?

I believe nobody's ever done

it before.

It would be all over the newspapers.

- What stopped you?

- Picturing myself...

hittin' the bottom.

The fear... the fear

of physical pain.

Pictured my brains on the ground.

I thought I still might

be alive.

- Do you have that same picture in your head about John Lennon?

Do you think he felt the pain you felt?

- Well, I'm sure he felt, uh... pain... I don't know... I guess

I didn't really know him.

- Did he do something to you, personally?

I don't want to talk anymore.

I don't want to talk about the killing.

I'm trying to block it out of my mind.

- Why is that?

Why do you think?

- I don't know.

- Have you ever killed anyone?

- No, I haven't.

- You ever seen someone dead?

- Yes.

- Bullet wounds, blood?

- Did you get excited about that?

- I'm done talking.

- It's conviction, you want, is it?

Or is it fame?

- We're done.

I'm done... talking.

- You certainly are.

- Yeah, yeah.

- Thank you, mr. Chapman.

It was great talking to you.

Step through.

...for this killer.

- Clear.

Step through.

[Stomping, clanging,

indistinct shouting...]

Hey, killer!

See you soon, killer!

Lennon's

killer had several days of

psychiatric examination under

a 24-hour suicide watch before

being moved to Rikers island

jail to a more secure cell

for his own protection from

other prisoners...

Do you want

to give me that?

- N-no, it's o.k.

- ...following a threat

scrawled on a prison wall.

"You don't have much time left.

Soon, killer. Soon."

Within days,

the lawyer assigned

to represent me withdrew.

This from a guy with a rep

for defending no-hope clients.

I began reading catcheragain

and it was like I was reading

a whole other book from

the one I had read before,

like I was reading a blueprint

of what had happened to me.

I made a list of

50 total coincidences.

It was like the whole killing

was set up by destiny, just

something that was meant to be.

That's when I realized that

John Lennon had been killed

to promote the reading of

the catcher in the rye.

And that same electric current passed through

my body again and lit up all

the cells of my brain.

I became euphoric, knowing now there was a reason beyond

myself for what I had done.

Shots have reportedly been fired as

president Reagan left

the Washington Hilton hotel this afternoon.

White house officials say the president was not hit,

but there are reports that three people were wounded by gunfire.

Correspondent Joe Ewog was there

when the shooting happened.

A quick series

of explosions, uh, sounding like firecrackers.

...into the back seat by one of

the secret service agents.

Uh, right after that, there was a...

- He got that from me.

- ...policemen swarming around,

uh, the man with the gun,

uh, surged back towards where

I was standing near one of

the doors to the hotel.

They quickly subdued and

wrestled him to the ground and

then put him in a police car.

John hinckley,

jr. Had become obsessed

by movie actress Jodie foster

and had imagined that she would

be impressed if he murdered

the president.

Good idea.

I had a backup list

but Reagan wasn't on it.

I was going for, uh, Jackie

Onassis, George c. Scott, Johnny

Carson if I couldn't get Lennon.

- Very anxious...

hyperventilating

and exhausted...

cooperative.

Insatiable need for attention.

- Have you seen, uh,

any other doctors at all?

- Grandiose visions

of himself...

mood fluctuations.

- Bingo.

- Paranoid tendencies...

rage.

- What was the logic

behind all this?

But you said you loved the man.

- Tell me about your mother.

Are you able to see that...

you're a separate person

from the person in the book?

My mission was

now to promote the catcher in

the rye.

I was gonna use my trial, the

trial of a century, to promote

the reading of that book.

- Two weeks before the trial,

chapman has instructed

his lawyers that he wishes

to plead guilty.

In a statement today, chapman

says that god had spoken to him

and wanted him to plead guilty.

Defense lawyer Jonathan marks

has asked judge Dennis Edwards

to have a panel re-examine him

to determine if he was competent

enough to make such a decision.

The judge refused.

I was never mad.

I was blessed.

But there was one more task

I had to endure.

I had to be purified... exorcised.

- I know you, satan.

- I'm a christian.

I can't be possessed.

- I command you, Satan, to come out.

- I summoned them up.

They're not inside.

...no!

- It is christ who

commands you.

Do you believe in God? The devil?

[Chapman screams,

speaking in tongues]

Have you ever woken up from a deep sleep with

the sensation that something

evil is in the room?

You're not really awake,

but you're not really

dreaming either.

Your eyes won't open more

than about halfway.

You just feel paralyzed with a fear that's so powerful,

you don't know who you are.

You're so frightened you've virtually lost your identity.

Fear can do that, you know.

It can strip you of your identity.

There's nothing more

frightening than that... I know.

Holy lord, almighty father, everlasting god

and father of our lord

Jesus Christ who once and for all consigned that fallen tyrant

to the flames of hell...

...who sent your only begotten

son into the world to crush

that roaring lion...

I was in a very surreal world.

I was in an utter panic of sheer

terror and wanted things

to go back to the way they were

before I pulled the trigger.

♪ I'm gonna love you ♪

♪ like nobody's loved you

♪ Come rain or come shine

♪ High as a mountain, deep as a river ♪

♪ Come rain or come shine...

My whole life

was like that at that time...

a half-waking nightmare.

I couldn't wake up and

I couldn't sleep it away.

I was scared to death

but I couldn't scream.

I would try to scream and it

would remain echoing in my chest

without even being vocalized.

And that was what came out

that night in December

when John Lennon stepped out

of his limousine.

What came out of the barrel of

that gun that night was a giant

scream after all those years.

...listen to some of

the Lennon records.

Listen to the background

of some of the Beatles' songs.

That screaming in the background, that's John Lennon.

Listen to him scream when he's

singing about not having his

mother, about being abandoned

by his mother and his father.

Poor guy's father left

the family then his mother

left him to be raised by

his aunt and uncle.

Then his mother got killed

after she came back to him

after all those years.

Just to think after a person had

been through all that he had

been through as a child,

then to get murdered by

somebody like me.

Uh, thank you all

very much and god bless you.

Under heavy

guard, mark chapman was brought

from prison to the state supreme

court in manhattan to hear

the judge's sentence.

Chapman showed no emotion

whatsoever when the sentence of

20 years-to-life was handed out,

but before that moment, there

was to be detailed evidence

about his state of mind.

- Chapman sat in a blue

t-shirt holding a copy of

catcher in the rye.

When the judge asked if he had

anything to say before the

sentence, chapman rose and read

a short passage from the book.

"...and I'm standing

at the edge of this crazy cliff.

What I have to do, I have

to catch everybody if

they start to go over the cliff.

I mean, if they're running and

they don't look where they're

going, I have to come out from

somewhere and catch them.

That's all I'll do all day.

I'd just stand there and be

the catcher in the rye and all.

I know it's crazy,

but that's the only thing

I'd really like to be.

I know it's crazy."

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ All of you listening to forfeited years ♪

♪ Forget what they taught you

♪ Open your ears

♪ And all of the great ones

♪ who sleep with the warm guns ♪

♪ Love is a dog bite

♪ You're losing your shelf life ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ Da, da, da-da

♪ Da, da, da-da

♪ Da, da-da, da-da, da

♪ Da, da-da, da... ah

♪ And all of the great ones who sleep with the warm guns ♪

♪ Love is a dog bite

♪ You're losing your shelf life ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ Da, da, da-da

♪ Da, da, da-da

♪ Da, da-da, da-da, da

♪ Da, da-da, da... ah

♪ And all of the great ones who sleep with the warm guns ♪

♪ Love is a dog bite

♪ You're losing your shelf life ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ I can't crawl out of this space ♪

♪ Our words fade without a trace ♪

♪ I can't crawl out, I can't crawl out...] ♪