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Would you like to inspect the original subtitles? These are the user uploaded subtitles that are being translated: 1 00:00:00,959 --> 00:00:02,495 Previously on iZombie... 2 00:00:03,128 --> 00:00:04,244 You're prosecuting Weckler? 3 00:00:04,463 --> 00:00:06,823 He confessed even though you didn't have much hard evidence. 4 00:00:06,965 --> 00:00:07,671 You haven't heard? 5 00:00:07,883 --> 00:00:10,500 James Weckler hanged himself in his cell this morning. 6 00:00:10,969 --> 00:00:14,337 Any idea who's going to be in charge of the world's only zombie military force now? 7 00:00:14,556 --> 00:00:17,156 Chase Graves, Vivian's brother-in-law, is gonna to take the reins. 8 00:00:17,184 --> 00:00:18,641 Sir! Yes, sir. 9 00:00:18,852 --> 00:00:20,388 After you w o uld beat me, 10 00:00:20,646 --> 00:00:21,646 I'd visit this well. 11 00:00:21,813 --> 00:00:23,145 Wish you'd drop dead. 12 00:00:23,357 --> 00:00:25,474 Harley and his people a r e targeting zombies. 13 00:00:25,692 --> 00:00:29,857 I landed us an invite to the zombie truthers meeting tomorrow night. 14 00:00:36,537 --> 00:00:40,531 That, boys and girls, is what we're dealing with. 15 00:00:40,791 --> 00:00:45,001 Those of us sitting in this room are all that's standing between an America we love, 16 00:00:45,170 --> 00:00:46,786 and a zombie-controlled wasteland. 17 00:00:46,797 --> 00:00:48,413 Yes, sir. 18 00:00:48,632 --> 00:00:49,964 Whether they look like this. 19 00:00:51,510 --> 00:00:53,126 - Or this. - God. 20 00:00:53,345 --> 00:00:56,304 - Oh, snap. - Or like our honorable mayoral candidate, 21 00:00:57,140 --> 00:00:58,381 a secret zombie. 22 00:00:58,600 --> 00:01:00,387 What makes you think he's a brain eater? 23 00:01:00,602 --> 00:01:02,343 Look at the facts. 24 00:01:02,563 --> 00:01:05,055 My brother worked down in the basement lab at Max Rager. 25 00:01:05,274 --> 00:01:07,607 Baracus and all of the other Chaos Killer victims 26 00:01:07,776 --> 00:01:09,642 are being experimented on down in the lab. 27 00:01:09,861 --> 00:01:12,604 Hell, they say as much in interviews. 28 00:01:12,823 --> 00:01:14,564 Well, they didn't say they were zombies. 29 00:01:15,242 --> 00:01:19,156 Maybe not. But when me and my brother Harley tried to visit Baracus, 30 00:01:19,371 --> 00:01:22,034 see if he'd take a little involuntary blood pressure test, 31 00:01:22,249 --> 00:01:24,912 he had zombie guards protecting him. 32 00:01:25,586 --> 00:01:27,999 So, they can just pass as normal-looking? 33 00:01:28,213 --> 00:01:29,213 Sure can. 34 00:01:30,090 --> 00:01:31,831 Ask Billy Cook here. 35 00:01:32,050 --> 00:01:34,383 He's the guy you heard on Chuck Burd's show. 36 00:01:34,636 --> 00:01:36,548 He saw it all go down at the Max Rager party. 37 00:01:38,432 --> 00:01:41,300 It's true. Everyone that walked in that party 38 00:01:42,144 --> 00:01:43,225 was just a normal person. 39 00:01:45,105 --> 00:01:46,266 But what I saw at the end? 40 00:01:48,025 --> 00:01:49,857 They were all red-eyed monsters. 41 00:01:50,068 --> 00:01:51,068 If you're here, 42 00:01:51,528 --> 00:01:53,923 it means that we can tell from what you've posted on the message boards 43 00:01:53,947 --> 00:01:58,032 you're ready to do more than hunker down and try to merely survive a zombie outbreak. 44 00:01:58,243 --> 00:01:59,359 Right. Yeah. 45 00:01:59,578 --> 00:02:00,989 My brothers and me, 46 00:02:02,205 --> 00:02:04,663 we're all in. We can't do it on our own. 47 00:02:04,875 --> 00:02:07,993 We need volunteers to keep tabs on all of our suspected zombies. 48 00:02:08,962 --> 00:02:10,578 Starting with 49 00:02:11,465 --> 00:02:12,797 Tim Addis. 50 00:02:12,966 --> 00:02:13,966 I'll do it. 51 00:02:14,051 --> 00:02:15,258 Here you go, Quick Draw. 52 00:02:17,012 --> 00:02:18,628 - Sandy Coleman. - I'll take that. 53 00:02:21,391 --> 00:02:22,427 So, yeah... 54 00:02:22,684 --> 00:02:24,676 The Scratching Post is under new management. 55 00:02:24,895 --> 00:02:29,230 Now, it's likely some of you heard how a couple members of the old regime were, um, 56 00:02:29,441 --> 00:02:31,433 terminated without notice. But, uh, 57 00:02:31,652 --> 00:02:32,733 let me tell you this, 58 00:02:33,111 --> 00:02:36,730 as long as you keep this operation as clean and tight as this roll up, 59 00:02:36,948 --> 00:02:38,280 you will be fine. 60 00:02:38,492 --> 00:02:39,886 Now, when I'm off attending other business, 61 00:02:39,910 --> 00:02:41,822 Don E. Here is my guy. 62 00:02:42,037 --> 00:02:43,573 What he says goes. 63 00:02:45,290 --> 00:02:46,906 Let's go make some money. 64 00:02:47,125 --> 00:02:49,993 Money, people! Let's make it! 65 00:02:51,338 --> 00:02:52,338 Don E... 66 00:02:57,219 --> 00:02:58,710 I'm kind of his guy. 67 00:02:59,763 --> 00:03:01,004 Uh-huh. 68 00:03:01,890 --> 00:03:03,802 I need you to keep this burner somewhere safe. 69 00:03:04,017 --> 00:03:05,633 I need to be able to reach you 24/7. 70 00:03:05,852 --> 00:03:09,186 Also, our new product is finally ready. 71 00:03:10,023 --> 00:03:12,811 This has been soaking for 20 days. 72 00:03:13,902 --> 00:03:16,690 That's twice as long as Ravi's recipe calls for. 73 00:03:17,531 --> 00:03:18,612 I need you 74 00:03:20,867 --> 00:03:22,358 to take it for a trial run. 75 00:03:22,619 --> 00:03:25,487 - I'm not sure that's the best use of my time. - I'll do it. 76 00:03:26,998 --> 00:03:29,581 - Fine. - What is it? 77 00:03:30,252 --> 00:03:33,711 This blue juice makes zombie visions longer and more intense. 78 00:03:33,922 --> 00:03:36,762 And if all goes according to plan, it's going to make us a lot of money. 79 00:03:38,760 --> 00:03:41,127 Our test brain belonged to 94-year-old Hoyt Carroll, 80 00:03:41,596 --> 00:03:43,929 a World War II waist gunner and noted ladies' man. 81 00:03:44,141 --> 00:03:45,757 Ladies' man. Right on. 82 00:03:46,017 --> 00:03:47,617 I need to know how long the visions last. 83 00:03:47,769 --> 00:03:49,726 And how soon they start, post-ingestion. 84 00:03:52,232 --> 00:03:54,690 That's, uh, after you eat it. 85 00:03:56,069 --> 00:03:59,437 Okay, I need all you volunteers to track your zombies' comings and goings 86 00:03:59,656 --> 00:04:00,656 and report back to me. 87 00:04:00,824 --> 00:04:02,656 And what are you gonna do with that info? 88 00:04:02,868 --> 00:04:04,148 Something that can't be ignored. 89 00:04:05,454 --> 00:04:06,535 Like what? 90 00:04:06,747 --> 00:04:07,747 Capture a zombie, 91 00:04:08,373 --> 00:04:10,831 starve it, broadcast it on a live stream, 92 00:04:11,042 --> 00:04:13,625 and let the whole world see the monster it becomes. 93 00:04:13,837 --> 00:04:15,669 - Right. - Whoo! 94 00:04:42,073 --> 00:04:43,314 Excuse me. 95 00:04:43,575 --> 00:04:46,864 I'm sorry, but I didn't know I was signing up for a kidnapping. 96 00:04:47,078 --> 00:04:48,535 Would you grow a pair, Billy? 97 00:04:49,414 --> 00:04:52,248 We are talking about the survival of the human race here! 98 00:04:52,459 --> 00:04:53,620 Perhaps I can help. 99 00:04:55,879 --> 00:04:57,495 My name is Ravi Chakrabarti. 100 00:04:57,714 --> 00:04:59,000 I work for the police. 101 00:04:59,925 --> 00:05:00,925 Allow me to explain. 102 00:05:02,302 --> 00:05:03,338 Yeah, you do that. 103 00:05:03,929 --> 00:05:05,215 I'm a medical examiner. 104 00:05:06,223 --> 00:05:08,431 I used to work for the CDC, but was fired 105 00:05:08,642 --> 00:05:11,680 for taking the possibility of a zombie apocalypse seriously. 106 00:05:11,895 --> 00:05:14,012 I am on your side. 107 00:05:14,231 --> 00:05:15,312 What do you know about 'em? 108 00:05:15,774 --> 00:05:18,437 They've existed in Seattle since the Boat Party Massacre. 109 00:05:19,736 --> 00:05:21,443 I examined several dead ones. 110 00:05:21,696 --> 00:05:23,437 I found brains in their digestive tracts 111 00:05:23,657 --> 00:05:25,193 and something under their fingernails. 112 00:05:25,408 --> 00:05:28,947 A substance which makes a zombie's scratch highly contagious. 113 00:05:29,162 --> 00:05:31,279 Which means trying to abduct one of them 114 00:05:31,498 --> 00:05:35,037 could start the very apocalypse we are trying to prevent. 115 00:05:35,252 --> 00:05:36,413 You said you could help. 116 00:05:36,670 --> 00:05:39,333 I'm close to developing a vaccine. 117 00:05:40,173 --> 00:05:42,333 One that will protect humans from the zombie contagion. 118 00:05:42,968 --> 00:05:43,968 How close? 119 00:05:44,803 --> 00:05:47,762 Like, a few weeks, at most. 120 00:05:48,557 --> 00:05:50,924 According to Google, Dr. Chakrabarti 121 00:05:51,184 --> 00:05:53,597 did, in fact, work for the CDC. 122 00:05:53,812 --> 00:05:54,928 He is who he says he is. 123 00:05:56,314 --> 00:05:57,314 Okay. 124 00:05:58,316 --> 00:06:00,273 We start surveilling all known zombies, 125 00:06:00,944 --> 00:06:03,311 but no contact while the doctor works on the vaccine. 126 00:06:07,701 --> 00:06:10,944 ETA 15 minutes? Ugh. 127 00:06:17,294 --> 00:06:18,410 Hey, Chakrabarti! 128 00:06:21,381 --> 00:06:22,462 What's up, Doc? 129 00:06:23,425 --> 00:06:25,465 Good work putting the brakes on the kidnapping talk. 130 00:06:25,635 --> 00:06:27,001 I'm Rachel, by the way. 131 00:06:28,096 --> 00:06:29,096 Ravi. 132 00:06:29,598 --> 00:06:31,760 Do you need a lift? I'm faster than Uber. 133 00:06:32,601 --> 00:06:34,263 Sure. Thank you. 134 00:06:34,519 --> 00:06:35,805 I'm just over there. 135 00:06:39,566 --> 00:06:42,183 Actually, their plan makes a lot of sense. 136 00:06:42,193 --> 00:06:43,729 It's just, uh, premature. 137 00:06:43,945 --> 00:06:46,403 Kidnapping? That's not why I showed up to this thing. 138 00:06:46,990 --> 00:06:48,276 Well, what brought you here? 139 00:06:48,491 --> 00:06:49,777 I'm a photographer. 140 00:06:50,035 --> 00:06:51,196 I want to shoot a zombie. 141 00:06:51,453 --> 00:06:53,866 - I've already got a Nessie and a Sasquatch. - Oh. 142 00:06:56,708 --> 00:06:58,324 I thought this was my ride. 143 00:07:00,253 --> 00:07:02,336 Nope. This is. 144 00:07:02,964 --> 00:07:08,710 You encounter a beautiful elfin creature, who offers to whisk you away on her steed. 145 00:07:09,721 --> 00:07:10,721 What do you do? 146 00:07:12,807 --> 00:07:14,264 The elf awaits. 147 00:07:15,477 --> 00:07:17,469 Will you join me, stranger? 148 00:07:18,229 --> 00:07:21,063 - Am I strong enough to get up on her horse? - You know you are. 149 00:07:22,233 --> 00:07:24,316 Then, yes, milady. 150 00:07:26,613 --> 00:07:28,479 You mount the horse successfully. 151 00:07:28,698 --> 00:07:31,315 Your compatriots proceed on foot. 152 00:07:31,534 --> 00:07:34,868 After a half-day's journey, you come to a tavern. 153 00:07:35,121 --> 00:07:39,035 Well, if there's anyone more dangerous than a gnome textile merchant inside, 154 00:07:39,709 --> 00:07:40,709 we flee in terror. 155 00:07:40,752 --> 00:07:43,870 We do not flee in terror. 156 00:07:44,089 --> 00:07:46,422 We enter and approach the bar. 157 00:07:47,092 --> 00:07:49,880 An ancient barkeep approaches. 158 00:07:50,136 --> 00:07:51,217 To Queen Larissa! 159 00:07:52,347 --> 00:07:53,883 Giver of life! 160 00:07:59,688 --> 00:08:01,350 Fair warning, strangers, 161 00:08:02,023 --> 00:08:06,393 a Ranger by the name of Longstockings was in here earlier, 162 00:08:06,611 --> 00:08:08,273 asking about... 163 00:08:10,448 --> 00:08:11,564 Oh, he's choking. 164 00:08:11,825 --> 00:08:13,487 I'll give him ye old Heimlich. 165 00:08:13,702 --> 00:08:15,318 I have a healing potion. 166 00:08:15,537 --> 00:08:18,701 Seriously, Dan. Longstockings was asking about what? 167 00:08:19,958 --> 00:08:23,122 - Dan. - I think this might really be happening. 168 00:08:23,586 --> 00:08:24,586 Holy crap. 169 00:08:24,713 --> 00:08:25,713 Who knows CPR? 170 00:08:32,470 --> 00:08:34,928 So, our Harley Johns followers want to kidnap a zombie? 171 00:08:35,181 --> 00:08:37,264 Yes. But, happily, not until I finish 172 00:08:37,475 --> 00:08:39,637 my utterly fictional anti-zombie vaccine. 173 00:08:39,853 --> 00:08:42,186 - Quick thinking. - It only buys us a couple of weeks. 174 00:08:42,397 --> 00:08:44,417 If they're willing to kidnap, they're willing to murder. 175 00:08:44,441 --> 00:08:47,294 Well, they seem like people that would execute a zombie family without blinking, 176 00:08:47,318 --> 00:08:49,518 but they didn't say anything about the Tuttle-Reid case. 177 00:08:56,870 --> 00:08:59,783 Victim's name is Dan Harbinson, 34. 178 00:09:02,292 --> 00:09:03,328 Uh... 179 00:09:05,003 --> 00:09:06,539 What the hell am I looking at? 180 00:09:06,713 --> 00:09:08,170 Dungeons & Dragons. 181 00:09:08,381 --> 00:09:10,964 The granddaddy of all fantasy role-playing games. 182 00:09:11,176 --> 00:09:12,712 So, the victim has kids? 183 00:09:12,969 --> 00:09:14,050 Adults play it, too. 184 00:09:14,054 --> 00:09:15,670 I bet you were so into this. 185 00:09:16,806 --> 00:09:18,672 Do I look like a nerd? 186 00:09:19,642 --> 00:09:22,134 - Detective. - What you got? 187 00:09:22,353 --> 00:09:25,221 Vic keeled over in the middle of game night after taking a swig of wine. 188 00:09:25,440 --> 00:09:27,602 One of the players called it in at 2:07 a.m. 189 00:09:27,817 --> 00:09:30,104 - The other players still here? - Yeah. This way. 190 00:09:30,320 --> 00:09:32,277 - A couple of them work at the station. - Cops? 191 00:09:32,614 --> 00:09:33,614 Not exactly. 192 00:09:39,871 --> 00:09:42,329 See what I mean? Nerds. 193 00:09:42,540 --> 00:09:45,533 Ah. Finally some friendly faces. 194 00:09:45,710 --> 00:09:46,710 Mind if I get my bag? 195 00:09:46,920 --> 00:09:49,833 Sorry, Jimmy. Everything in there is evidence. Sit. 196 00:09:51,925 --> 00:09:54,133 How often do you all get together for these game nights? 197 00:09:54,344 --> 00:09:57,883 Weekly. Dan's been our DM almost seven years now. 198 00:09:58,139 --> 00:10:00,222 - DM? - Dungeon Master. 199 00:10:00,433 --> 00:10:02,516 Basically like a referee. 200 00:10:02,727 --> 00:10:04,309 He creates the details in the adventure, 201 00:10:04,521 --> 00:10:07,480 and describes what the players see and hear along the way. 202 00:10:07,690 --> 00:10:09,477 Including the other characters we encounter. 203 00:10:09,734 --> 00:10:11,020 Dragon, diplomat. 204 00:10:11,236 --> 00:10:14,024 Dan's final character, a common barkeep. 205 00:10:14,823 --> 00:10:17,440 Toasted the Queen, quaffed mead from the Grail of Eternal Buzzery, 206 00:10:17,450 --> 00:10:19,157 and crossed over the River Styx. 207 00:10:19,160 --> 00:10:20,992 The wine was poisoned. 208 00:10:21,204 --> 00:10:22,445 What type of poison? 209 00:10:22,455 --> 00:10:24,697 An extremely rare one. Gelsemine. 210 00:10:24,916 --> 00:10:27,408 Any of the players could've slipped it into the open wine bottle 211 00:10:27,418 --> 00:10:29,418 while Dan and the others were absorbed by the game. 212 00:10:31,005 --> 00:10:32,086 Those were in his pockets. 213 00:10:35,260 --> 00:10:37,798 I can't believe grown adults play this for hours at a time. 214 00:10:38,054 --> 00:10:39,054 Grown nerds. 215 00:10:41,432 --> 00:10:43,389 Mmm. Who's hungry? 216 00:11:00,785 --> 00:11:03,072 Vampire Steve's up first. Ready? 217 00:11:03,288 --> 00:11:04,529 The question is, "Are you?" 218 00:11:06,082 --> 00:11:08,665 Sixty feet away, your first suspect awaits. 219 00:11:08,877 --> 00:11:11,415 A nocturnal creature whose loyalties are in question. 220 00:11:11,629 --> 00:11:13,040 Strength, below average. 221 00:11:13,256 --> 00:11:14,997 Charisma, below average. 222 00:11:15,175 --> 00:11:16,416 What do you do? 223 00:11:16,634 --> 00:11:17,634 I go in and question him. 224 00:11:22,682 --> 00:11:23,682 You coming? 225 00:11:28,062 --> 00:11:29,519 Indeed I am. 226 00:11:30,857 --> 00:11:33,895 It says here y o ur DM made his living pl a ying online poker. 227 00:11:34,110 --> 00:11:35,942 Any idea how much Dan earned? 228 00:11:36,446 --> 00:11:38,438 Master Dan didn't speak of his wealth, 229 00:11:38,698 --> 00:11:40,815 but he must've been doing quite well, indeed. 230 00:11:41,034 --> 00:11:42,696 He bought original cover art 231 00:11:42,911 --> 00:11:45,995 to an Ogden Twiddlyhut a n d the Valiant Men of Golden Glen. 232 00:11:46,748 --> 00:11:49,365 I've seen those sell for as much as $10,000. 233 00:11:49,584 --> 00:11:52,668 You know, that's not listed in our crime scene inventory. 234 00:11:52,879 --> 00:11:55,166 It was hanging above his fireplace last week. 235 00:11:55,423 --> 00:11:57,540 How long have you been playing in Dan's campaign? 236 00:11:57,759 --> 00:11:59,045 Nigh unto seven years. 237 00:11:59,260 --> 00:12:01,343 Why were you all playing first level characters? 238 00:12:01,554 --> 00:12:03,716 We were a party of heroes and legends, 239 00:12:03,932 --> 00:12:06,640 but we were slain last week in the Caverns of Varag. 240 00:12:06,851 --> 00:12:07,967 I know them well. 241 00:12:08,228 --> 00:12:10,766 Danger lurks behind every stalactite. 242 00:12:11,481 --> 00:12:13,768 And how did you come to meet your untimely demise? 243 00:12:15,944 --> 00:12:18,357 Darts dipped in Pit Fiend venom. 244 00:12:18,571 --> 00:12:20,608 Our thief failed to detect a trap. 245 00:12:20,823 --> 00:12:23,190 Your group was pretend-killed by poison last week, 246 00:12:23,409 --> 00:12:27,073 and this week, your dungeon master was real-life-killed by poison. 247 00:12:27,288 --> 00:12:30,281 Even though the Reverend Deodato was wearing his Absorption Stone. 248 00:12:30,500 --> 00:12:32,787 He should've been immune to poison. 249 00:12:33,002 --> 00:12:35,289 Who is Reverend Dodle Doodle? 250 00:12:35,505 --> 00:12:36,746 My 15-level cleric. 251 00:12:36,923 --> 00:12:38,755 Fool! You were in a cavern! 252 00:12:38,967 --> 00:12:41,584 - Your Absorption Stone would be worthless. - So sayeth you. 253 00:12:41,803 --> 00:12:45,342 An Absorption Stone doesn't work anywhere untouched by the sun. 254 00:12:45,556 --> 00:12:47,388 Uh... Sun Hammer. 255 00:12:52,855 --> 00:12:55,438 Is it safe to say your group of heroes and legends 256 00:12:55,650 --> 00:12:57,607 had grown attached to these old characters? 257 00:12:57,819 --> 00:13:00,619 Not attached enough to murder our friend, if that's what you're asking. 258 00:13:00,655 --> 00:13:02,775 You can't imagine anyone in your group seeking revenge 259 00:13:02,907 --> 00:13:04,694 for Dan killing your characters? 260 00:13:04,951 --> 00:13:08,115 Well, I can't read their minds, obviously. 261 00:13:08,663 --> 00:13:10,620 I'd put the odds at one in 100. 262 00:13:17,046 --> 00:13:18,662 Your saving throw fails. 263 00:13:18,881 --> 00:13:20,088 You're all dead. 264 00:13:20,300 --> 00:13:22,500 - My saving roll is a three? - It's called a Sun Hammer! 265 00:13:22,635 --> 00:13:25,594 - Are you on some kind of power trip! - You're such a dick, Dan. 266 00:13:29,726 --> 00:13:31,012 I think we're good here. 267 00:13:31,436 --> 00:13:33,393 We'll call you back in if we need anything more. 268 00:13:39,402 --> 00:13:40,402 What'd you see? 269 00:13:40,611 --> 00:13:43,604 The players all lost their minds when their characters died. 270 00:13:43,865 --> 00:13:45,777 They were in Dan's face, screaming at him. 271 00:13:45,950 --> 00:13:47,066 Who do we go to next? 272 00:13:50,330 --> 00:13:51,330 Zoe. 273 00:13:54,042 --> 00:13:58,127 "Time for vision to start after eating brain, five minutes." 274 00:13:58,379 --> 00:14:00,291 "Length of vision, two hours." 275 00:14:01,007 --> 00:14:03,465 Penmanship, poor. 276 00:14:03,676 --> 00:14:05,668 - How was the ride? - Primo. 277 00:14:05,887 --> 00:14:07,594 I was in the middle of a dogfight. 278 00:14:07,764 --> 00:14:10,973 Felt like I was shooting real bullets. Shooting down Nazis. 279 00:14:10,975 --> 00:14:12,887 Damn, man. It was intense. 280 00:14:13,102 --> 00:14:15,389 Later, I'm getting with this French girl, 281 00:14:15,605 --> 00:14:18,598 and she's nonstop into playing Hide the Baguette, so I'm... 282 00:14:18,858 --> 00:14:20,315 Okay. Got it. Got it. 283 00:14:21,319 --> 00:14:24,153 Boys, we're gonna be rich. 284 00:14:26,282 --> 00:14:27,343 I'm gonna go to Shady Plots 285 00:14:27,367 --> 00:14:29,678 and see if there's any promising new stiffs for blue-juicing. 286 00:14:29,702 --> 00:14:32,786 Meantime, you two start hyping our new product. 287 00:14:36,793 --> 00:14:38,659 - You get all that booze put away? - Can do. 288 00:14:55,853 --> 00:14:56,853 Cleared for takeoff. 289 00:15:12,745 --> 00:15:13,986 Oh, no. 290 00:15:18,668 --> 00:15:19,668 Oh... 291 00:15:19,794 --> 00:15:20,875 Hey. 292 00:15:21,295 --> 00:15:23,833 You know that stealing mail is a federal offense, right? 293 00:15:24,048 --> 00:15:26,165 I was hiding mail. 294 00:15:26,384 --> 00:15:28,296 - Why are you... - Opening my hate mail? 295 00:15:28,511 --> 00:15:31,174 Better question, why were you hiding it from me? 296 00:15:31,389 --> 00:15:34,348 Because I'm kind and empathetic. 297 00:15:34,559 --> 00:15:36,892 You know, I used to do all right with girls. 298 00:15:37,228 --> 00:15:38,560 I suppose I can believe that. 299 00:15:38,771 --> 00:15:41,354 The only girls who don't avoid me completely these days 300 00:15:41,566 --> 00:15:43,023 are the ones out at Fillmore-Graves. 301 00:15:43,234 --> 00:15:45,254 And they're zombies, so that doesn't do me much good. 302 00:15:45,278 --> 00:15:47,941 I may never be loved or have sex again 303 00:15:48,156 --> 00:15:51,274 unless I move to some backwards civilization that doesn't consume news. 304 00:15:51,492 --> 00:15:52,528 Like Pullman. 305 00:15:52,743 --> 00:15:53,743 Oh! 306 00:15:53,911 --> 00:15:54,992 Sick Wazzu burn. 307 00:15:55,496 --> 00:15:56,496 Wazzu? 308 00:15:57,290 --> 00:15:58,906 Washington State? 309 00:15:59,125 --> 00:16:01,538 Share my cultural touchstones! 310 00:16:01,794 --> 00:16:03,626 Ah! Listen to this love letter. 311 00:16:03,838 --> 00:16:05,875 When they make a Chaos Killer TV movie, 312 00:16:06,340 --> 00:16:08,627 I hope you watch it in hell with your pal Ted Bundy. 313 00:16:08,801 --> 00:16:11,168 Wait, you didn't actually kill anyone. 314 00:16:11,387 --> 00:16:14,471 Yeah, and the joke's on them. I'm not pals with Ted Bundy either. 315 00:16:14,474 --> 00:16:17,808 Ah! This one wishes I'd been blown to bits in the Max Rager explosion. 316 00:16:18,019 --> 00:16:20,887 This one wants my future family kidnapped, so I know how it feels. 317 00:16:21,105 --> 00:16:23,563 Enough, Major. Stop torturing yourself! 318 00:16:23,774 --> 00:16:24,774 This one 319 00:16:25,568 --> 00:16:26,900 says, uh, 320 00:16:28,196 --> 00:16:30,904 - I didn't do it. - Really? 321 00:16:31,741 --> 00:16:35,405 "I know how crazy it must be to get a letter like this from a total stranger." 322 00:16:35,661 --> 00:16:38,119 "But I was also accused of something I didn't do." 323 00:16:38,331 --> 00:16:41,995 "If you ever need a sympathetic ear, I've got two. Shawna." 324 00:16:45,254 --> 00:16:46,620 Monster! 325 00:16:47,465 --> 00:16:49,331 She must've done whatever she was accused of. 326 00:16:51,177 --> 00:16:53,464 Well, she included her phone number. 327 00:16:53,679 --> 00:16:55,295 - Mmm. - And this. 328 00:16:59,018 --> 00:17:00,018 She's cute. 329 00:17:02,313 --> 00:17:06,353 So I read the report you wrote on James Weckler as his prison psychiatrist. 330 00:17:06,567 --> 00:17:08,900 What were you treating him for exactly, Dr. Danforth? 331 00:17:09,111 --> 00:17:10,818 Apparitional hallucinations. 332 00:17:11,614 --> 00:17:14,322 He saw ghosts. Well, a ghost. 333 00:17:14,867 --> 00:17:15,903 Of his deceased wife. 334 00:17:16,911 --> 00:17:18,402 I guess it makes sense he'd 335 00:17:18,621 --> 00:17:20,988 go looking for comfort elsewhere. 336 00:17:22,083 --> 00:17:25,417 - How do you mean? - His supposed murder victim was a dominatrix. 337 00:17:25,670 --> 00:17:26,870 James started out as a client. 338 00:17:26,921 --> 00:17:28,457 No way. 339 00:17:29,048 --> 00:17:32,166 James lost all interest in sex after his wife died. 340 00:17:32,426 --> 00:17:34,759 He simply couldn't do anything his wife didn't approve of. 341 00:17:34,971 --> 00:17:36,611 She most certainly would not have approved 342 00:17:36,847 --> 00:17:39,464 of him spending his limited funds on a dominatrix. 343 00:17:42,103 --> 00:17:44,265 Man, this really takes me back. 344 00:17:44,480 --> 00:17:45,840 I didn't know you were into comics. 345 00:17:46,023 --> 00:17:47,514 Just The Flash. 346 00:17:47,733 --> 00:17:51,101 His dad didn't have much faith in him, either. 347 00:17:51,737 --> 00:17:52,853 Aw... 348 00:17:52,863 --> 00:17:54,604 I'm messing with you. 349 00:17:54,615 --> 00:17:56,481 He was super-fast and he had a cool name. 350 00:18:02,707 --> 00:18:03,948 Liv, look at this. 351 00:18:04,792 --> 00:18:06,454 The Ogden Twiddlyhut thingy. 352 00:18:06,669 --> 00:18:08,789 The one missing from the inventory of Dan's apartment. 353 00:18:09,046 --> 00:18:11,288 On sale for $5,000. 354 00:18:17,513 --> 00:18:19,004 Keep going. 355 00:18:20,224 --> 00:18:23,888 When you finish down there, you can take me to second breakfast. 356 00:18:32,862 --> 00:18:33,898 Sorry. 357 00:18:34,113 --> 00:18:36,981 Guy needed a moment to say goodbye to his entire comic book collection. 358 00:18:37,199 --> 00:18:39,361 We just had a few more questions. Starting with, 359 00:18:39,577 --> 00:18:41,739 why is Dan's missing cover art here, for sale? 360 00:18:41,996 --> 00:18:44,033 This is the first time Lady Wellin Marsapple, 361 00:18:44,248 --> 00:18:45,784 hero of the Ogden Twiddlyhut series, 362 00:18:46,000 --> 00:18:47,741 has ever appeared in print. 363 00:18:47,918 --> 00:18:50,501 And who says it's missing? I won it off Dan in a bet. 364 00:18:50,755 --> 00:18:52,997 You had five grand to lose in a bet? 365 00:18:53,007 --> 00:18:55,545 Or maybe you didn't bet cash. 366 00:18:55,801 --> 00:18:59,636 Maybe you bet some erotic cosplay involving Halfling feet. 367 00:19:01,265 --> 00:19:03,222 Did you guys talk to Jimmy? 368 00:19:03,434 --> 00:19:05,426 Dan and I hadn't been sleeping together long. 369 00:19:05,645 --> 00:19:06,805 We tried to keep it a secret. 370 00:19:06,937 --> 00:19:10,897 But I think that Jimmy saw a naughty text I sent to Dan. 371 00:19:11,108 --> 00:19:12,770 So, you and Dan? 372 00:19:13,486 --> 00:19:17,696 It's the way he wielded all that power. Oh! It was intoxicating. 373 00:19:18,407 --> 00:19:20,694 Why would Jimmy care if that's how you felt about Dan? 374 00:19:20,910 --> 00:19:23,197 Well, I can tell when a guy's got a crush on me. 375 00:19:23,412 --> 00:19:25,278 Like my character, I'm pretty intuitive. 376 00:19:27,792 --> 00:19:29,374 I wouldn't say I had a crush. 377 00:19:29,585 --> 00:19:32,328 That's funny, given what we found in your bag. 378 00:19:32,880 --> 00:19:36,373 Seeing the sketch pad, Jimmy's eyes dart back and forth. 379 00:19:36,717 --> 00:19:38,458 Guilt etched on his face. 380 00:19:41,305 --> 00:19:42,921 - This is very creative. - Mmm-hmm. 381 00:19:55,611 --> 00:19:57,728 Liv saves against upchucking. 382 00:19:59,240 --> 00:20:01,823 And here's you 383 00:20:03,285 --> 00:20:04,401 and Zoe. 384 00:20:06,330 --> 00:20:08,868 - Yeah. - Did you realize Zoe and Dan were sleeping together? 385 00:20:10,376 --> 00:20:11,742 Were you jealous of Dan? 386 00:20:13,003 --> 00:20:16,838 I wonder how far you'd go to win the object of your obsession. 387 00:20:18,676 --> 00:20:21,276 You wanna talk about obsession? You should check out Diego's back. 388 00:20:24,098 --> 00:20:27,591 How long after you got this did you learn Zoe was sleeping with Dan? 389 00:20:27,810 --> 00:20:29,176 Not long enough. 390 00:20:29,395 --> 00:20:30,727 Steve knew, too. 391 00:20:31,272 --> 00:20:32,683 And he's really into Zoe. 392 00:20:32,898 --> 00:20:34,309 Where did Steve put his tattoo? 393 00:20:34,525 --> 00:20:35,936 It's not about his ink. 394 00:20:36,152 --> 00:20:38,986 It's his whole Boys Don't Cry. Era Robert Smith thing. 395 00:20:39,238 --> 00:20:41,104 As he is, so has he ever been. 396 00:20:41,323 --> 00:20:43,360 No. He used to be a blond. 397 00:20:43,576 --> 00:20:45,033 Then he found out Zoe was a Twihard, 398 00:20:45,244 --> 00:20:47,531 and then he became Vampire Steve. 399 00:20:51,667 --> 00:20:54,000 Diego told us you did all this 400 00:20:56,255 --> 00:20:57,496 to get with Zoe. 401 00:20:57,715 --> 00:20:59,502 I came to vampires of my own accord. 402 00:20:59,675 --> 00:21:02,509 It is but one of many interests I happen to share with Zoe. 403 00:21:02,720 --> 00:21:04,131 Name another. 404 00:21:04,346 --> 00:21:05,587 Graphic novels. 405 00:21:05,765 --> 00:21:07,677 Especially those pertaining to vampires. 406 00:21:07,892 --> 00:21:10,054 And yet she chose someone else. 407 00:21:10,269 --> 00:21:11,760 That must have been frustrating. 408 00:21:12,021 --> 00:21:14,764 I think we may yet be joined in holy union. 409 00:21:14,774 --> 00:21:15,981 Good luck with that. 410 00:21:16,192 --> 00:21:17,192 She's polyandrous, 411 00:21:17,234 --> 00:21:19,601 and would only stay married until a hale child is born. 412 00:21:19,820 --> 00:21:22,688 Plus, you'd need to find a unicorn to sacrifice. 413 00:21:22,907 --> 00:21:24,443 You don't know. I could find a unicorn. 414 00:21:24,658 --> 00:21:26,149 I was talking about real life. 415 00:21:27,203 --> 00:21:28,203 Oh. 416 00:21:28,496 --> 00:21:29,862 I think we're done here. 417 00:21:30,623 --> 00:21:32,364 Thank you, Steve. You can go. 418 00:21:35,669 --> 00:21:38,662 The veteran detective 419 00:21:38,881 --> 00:21:40,497 closes his notepad in defeat, 420 00:21:40,716 --> 00:21:43,834 as another suspect slips through his fingers. 421 00:21:44,845 --> 00:21:47,053 Any of these guys feel like a murderer to you? 422 00:21:47,264 --> 00:21:49,677 None of them could draw blood from a one-eyed kobold. 423 00:21:51,227 --> 00:21:52,308 Yeah, probably not. 424 00:21:53,854 --> 00:21:55,516 So we should do some more digging. 425 00:21:57,149 --> 00:21:58,435 On a quest! 426 00:21:58,859 --> 00:22:02,899 One that will require a band of eager souls, ready to test their mettle! 427 00:22:03,113 --> 00:22:06,026 Oh, no. You're talking about playing the game, aren't you? 428 00:22:06,242 --> 00:22:07,528 Not just a game, good sir! 429 00:22:09,703 --> 00:22:10,703 A quest! 430 00:22:18,128 --> 00:22:21,542 You each start the campaign with this many gold pieces. 431 00:22:24,385 --> 00:22:25,592 Twenty-seven gold pieces. 432 00:22:26,428 --> 00:22:29,421 I buy a small farm, retire from adventuring. 433 00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:31,427 We've been diddling around for two hours. 434 00:22:31,642 --> 00:22:32,974 We haven't actually done anything. 435 00:22:33,143 --> 00:22:35,503 The creation of characters is an essential part of the game. 436 00:22:35,688 --> 00:22:37,395 The actual point of which is... 437 00:22:37,606 --> 00:22:40,394 Ooh! To trigger a vision to help solve Dungeon Master Dan's murder. 438 00:22:40,609 --> 00:22:43,397 And who might this hirsute stranger be? Introduce yourself. 439 00:22:45,948 --> 00:22:49,942 I am Mosco Bandywax of the Mirkwood Bandywaxes. I'm a Halfling monk. 440 00:22:50,160 --> 00:22:51,526 And you, good sir? 441 00:22:51,537 --> 00:22:54,325 I am Sir Jay Esclaborne, the human paladin. 442 00:22:54,540 --> 00:22:56,580 I don't remember yourcharacter earning a knighthood. 443 00:22:56,792 --> 00:22:58,954 Oh, he's not a knight. His first name is. 444 00:22:59,169 --> 00:23:00,626 - Sirjay. - Clever. 445 00:23:01,130 --> 00:23:02,130 I'll be watching you. 446 00:23:02,965 --> 00:23:03,965 And, you, madam? 447 00:23:05,509 --> 00:23:09,002 Hi. Uh, Brangelina Darksbane. 448 00:23:09,388 --> 00:23:10,629 Dark elf assassin. 449 00:23:12,474 --> 00:23:14,261 And who might this stout fellow be? 450 00:23:15,978 --> 00:23:17,560 Earl. Dwarf fighter. 451 00:23:18,188 --> 00:23:19,188 Earl. 452 00:23:20,858 --> 00:23:22,815 Your story begins. 453 00:23:23,027 --> 00:23:25,770 Night falls on Astergrove. 454 00:23:26,030 --> 00:23:30,946 A hamlet on the frontier of the human kingdom of Oosterglovia. 455 00:23:31,160 --> 00:23:32,901 You have never seen each other before, 456 00:23:33,120 --> 00:23:36,909 but you find yourselves gathered in the study of Georgie Fogglebottom. 457 00:23:37,166 --> 00:23:39,783 Last wizard east of Gloomy Glen. 458 00:23:40,586 --> 00:23:42,498 You regard each other uncomfortably. 459 00:23:44,548 --> 00:23:46,335 You regard each other uncomfortably. 460 00:23:49,553 --> 00:23:52,512 Anyone know if Gloomy Glen is a person or a place? 461 00:23:52,765 --> 00:23:54,882 Either way, we should steer clear. 462 00:23:54,892 --> 00:23:56,224 Silence. 463 00:23:56,435 --> 00:23:58,552 A door opens in the back of the room, 464 00:23:58,771 --> 00:24:01,605 and in walks a small, unarmed woman 465 00:24:01,607 --> 00:24:02,723 holding a tea cup. 466 00:24:03,484 --> 00:24:04,520 She takes a sip, 467 00:24:06,278 --> 00:24:08,736 sits down, and regards the group. 468 00:24:11,283 --> 00:24:13,445 This was the best I could do? 469 00:24:14,912 --> 00:24:16,073 Very well. 470 00:24:16,664 --> 00:24:19,828 You will kill the Lich of Castle Rommscoddle. 471 00:24:20,042 --> 00:24:21,042 Lich, please! 472 00:24:21,752 --> 00:24:24,540 If you survive, you will bring me his head. 473 00:24:24,755 --> 00:24:26,747 Then, and only then, 474 00:24:26,966 --> 00:24:30,585 will you be showered with treasure befitting your efforts. 475 00:24:30,803 --> 00:24:32,465 Sounds dangerous, Mosco. 476 00:24:32,972 --> 00:24:35,430 Maybe you should go outside and wait on your horse. 477 00:24:35,683 --> 00:24:36,890 What's a lich? 478 00:24:37,101 --> 00:24:39,468 Oh, a lich is a terrible creature. 479 00:24:39,687 --> 00:24:41,553 A member of the undead. 480 00:24:42,147 --> 00:24:42,933 Gross! 481 00:24:43,148 --> 00:24:44,250 Kill it! Kill the undead creature! 482 00:24:44,274 --> 00:24:45,274 Let me get this straight. 483 00:24:45,401 --> 00:24:49,145 So, we can go and find Castle What's-His-Nuts, 484 00:24:49,822 --> 00:24:53,281 fight that thing, come back and we'll get rewarded by this little old lady. 485 00:24:53,283 --> 00:24:54,899 Or we could just 486 00:24:55,077 --> 00:24:58,366 tie up this little old lady, and take what we want now. 487 00:24:58,372 --> 00:25:00,739 Georgie begins to mutter an incantation. 488 00:25:02,960 --> 00:25:05,919 Electricity fires from her hands and strikes Brangelina. 489 00:25:06,171 --> 00:25:07,931 I try to dive in front of the lightning bolt. 490 00:25:08,298 --> 00:25:11,291 Not on this day, Ms. Fogglebottom! 491 00:25:11,510 --> 00:25:13,502 The lightning bolt has already struck Brangelina. 492 00:25:13,721 --> 00:25:17,305 And Mosco lands on the ground in front of her, looking foolish. 493 00:25:17,725 --> 00:25:19,341 Brangelina, you take... 494 00:25:20,686 --> 00:25:22,348 Thirty-four points damage. 495 00:25:22,563 --> 00:25:23,843 How many hit points do you have? 496 00:25:26,650 --> 00:25:27,650 Thirty-four. 497 00:25:28,152 --> 00:25:29,484 Well. I'm dead. 498 00:25:29,695 --> 00:25:31,061 Uh, good luck with the lich. 499 00:25:31,280 --> 00:25:34,068 I bid thee, Fellowship of the Dorks, goodnight. 500 00:25:34,283 --> 00:25:35,615 Oh, uh, I bind her wounds, 501 00:25:35,826 --> 00:25:37,658 begin mouth-to-mouth resuscitation. 502 00:25:37,911 --> 00:25:39,277 I move toward the light. 503 00:25:39,538 --> 00:25:41,074 Mosco won't give up. 504 00:25:41,290 --> 00:25:42,726 He keeps performing chest compressions, 505 00:25:42,750 --> 00:25:46,460 keeps engulfing her mouth with his, breathing his life force into hers! 506 00:25:46,670 --> 00:25:48,753 Live! Live, damn you! 507 00:25:50,257 --> 00:25:52,294 Brangelina's eyes flutter open. 508 00:25:57,848 --> 00:26:01,637 So, what say you, Fellowship of the Dorks? 509 00:26:01,810 --> 00:26:04,644 Do you venture forth and face the lich 510 00:26:04,855 --> 00:26:07,973 or stay and take your chances with me? 511 00:26:13,781 --> 00:26:16,148 You enter the lich's quarters. You hear muttering. 512 00:26:16,366 --> 00:26:19,825 You look up, and you see the lich perched on a giant wooden chandelier. 513 00:26:20,037 --> 00:26:22,199 A fireball comes hurtling down at you. 514 00:26:22,414 --> 00:26:23,530 Not good. 515 00:26:24,666 --> 00:26:26,202 Everyone takes 38 points damage. 516 00:26:26,418 --> 00:26:27,418 I'm dead. 517 00:26:27,461 --> 00:26:28,201 I bind her wounds. 518 00:26:28,420 --> 00:26:30,582 - I begin to... - You're dead, too, Halfling. 519 00:26:31,131 --> 00:26:32,542 Your turn. What do you do? 520 00:26:32,758 --> 00:26:33,874 I swing with my long sword. 521 00:26:34,134 --> 00:26:36,467 At what? The Lich is 10 feet above you. 522 00:26:36,678 --> 00:26:38,169 Well, throw something! 523 00:26:38,388 --> 00:26:40,241 Isn't there a stone somewhere? Don't you have a dagger? 524 00:26:40,265 --> 00:26:41,597 - The dwarf! - Say what? 525 00:26:41,809 --> 00:26:43,329 I throw the dwarf up to the chandelier. 526 00:26:43,477 --> 00:26:44,263 I've got 18 strength. 527 00:26:44,478 --> 00:26:46,118 Does the dwarf allow himself to be thrown? 528 00:26:46,730 --> 00:26:47,971 Yeah, fine. 529 00:26:48,190 --> 00:26:50,056 Sirjay throws Earl up to the chandelier. 530 00:26:51,610 --> 00:26:53,567 He sticks the landing. Earl, what do you do? 531 00:26:53,779 --> 00:26:58,114 I cleave this undead hellspawn in twain with my Ax of the Dwarven Gods. 532 00:27:01,537 --> 00:27:03,904 You hit. Roll for damage. 533 00:27:05,582 --> 00:27:06,993 Booyah! 534 00:27:07,668 --> 00:27:10,536 How you like old Earl now, you damn dirty lich? 535 00:27:10,796 --> 00:27:12,207 Is it dead? 536 00:27:12,464 --> 00:27:14,000 The lich looks badly wounded, 537 00:27:14,258 --> 00:27:15,938 but it launches itself from the chandelier, 538 00:27:15,968 --> 00:27:18,460 and disappears from view as it enters this antechamber. 539 00:27:18,637 --> 00:27:21,471 - We give chase! - You go into the chamber, but the lich is gone. 540 00:27:21,682 --> 00:27:23,469 We search the room for secret doors. 541 00:27:26,103 --> 00:27:27,139 Dan? 542 00:27:28,647 --> 00:27:30,013 What the hell is this place? 543 00:27:30,232 --> 00:27:32,189 Has this room always been here? 544 00:27:34,444 --> 00:27:36,561 - What did you see? - A secret door. 545 00:27:36,780 --> 00:27:38,066 In Dan's apartment. 546 00:27:38,282 --> 00:27:39,282 Great, we're done here. 547 00:27:40,242 --> 00:27:41,323 No, we're not. 548 00:27:42,286 --> 00:27:44,027 Where is the lich? 549 00:27:48,458 --> 00:27:52,668 Boy, Georgie Fogglebottom's face when I reached into my bag of holding 550 00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:56,214 and pulled out that lich head, like... Yeah! 551 00:27:56,466 --> 00:27:58,002 What do you think of them apples? 552 00:27:58,218 --> 00:27:59,218 I was there. 553 00:27:59,636 --> 00:28:02,174 I think playing all night might've been a bad idea. 554 00:28:02,389 --> 00:28:07,054 Now that I've leveled up, I get two attacks a round. That's gonna be tight. 555 00:28:07,269 --> 00:28:09,056 Hey, maybe we could have a regular game. 556 00:28:09,313 --> 00:28:11,646 You could save a little Dan brain, eat some every week. 557 00:28:11,857 --> 00:28:14,144 Clive, I saw that suit of armor in my vision. 558 00:28:14,359 --> 00:28:17,022 It means the hidden door to the secret room must be... 559 00:28:18,989 --> 00:28:20,025 There. 560 00:28:32,377 --> 00:28:33,834 White people. 561 00:28:36,506 --> 00:28:38,372 A computer geek's paradise. 562 00:28:40,260 --> 00:28:41,592 What the hell am I looking at? 563 00:28:41,803 --> 00:28:43,760 "Remote fuel rod system override." 564 00:28:43,972 --> 00:28:45,588 "Leningrad Nuclear Power Plant." 565 00:28:45,807 --> 00:28:47,594 When did you learn to read Russian? 566 00:28:47,809 --> 00:28:49,141 A couple of days ago. 567 00:28:49,853 --> 00:28:51,719 You know Russian, maybe you know passwords. 568 00:28:52,356 --> 00:28:53,392 Let's see. 569 00:28:54,942 --> 00:28:55,942 Apparently not. 570 00:29:02,532 --> 00:29:05,240 I'm gonna tell Devore what we found. 571 00:29:05,452 --> 00:29:06,572 Let's bring Zoe in tomorrow. 572 00:29:06,703 --> 00:29:08,160 See what she knew about this room 573 00:29:08,372 --> 00:29:10,329 and Dan's interest in Russian power plants. 574 00:29:12,042 --> 00:29:13,658 Yeah, I knew about the secret room. 575 00:29:13,669 --> 00:29:14,955 How'd you find it? 576 00:29:15,170 --> 00:29:16,661 I went over to Dan's one day, 577 00:29:16,880 --> 00:29:18,712 heard music coming from behind the wall, 578 00:29:18,924 --> 00:29:20,586 pushed on the bookcase and there it was. 579 00:29:22,594 --> 00:29:23,594 She's done here. 580 00:29:23,762 --> 00:29:24,762 You can go. 581 00:29:28,267 --> 00:29:29,599 We're shutting down the case. 582 00:29:29,851 --> 00:29:31,467 - Why? - The FBI stepped in. 583 00:29:31,687 --> 00:29:33,474 They're chasing the cyber-crime angle. 584 00:29:33,647 --> 00:29:35,667 They think that your victim might have been poisoned 585 00:29:35,691 --> 00:29:38,604 by a Russian agent to stop him from hacking into their system. 586 00:29:38,777 --> 00:29:41,941 You know, that actually makes more sense than any of our suspects. 587 00:29:42,155 --> 00:29:43,236 Let the Feds figure it out. 588 00:29:43,448 --> 00:29:44,780 They put Bozzio on it. 589 00:29:46,159 --> 00:29:49,072 - Bozzio? - She was here a minute ago. You must've just missed her. 590 00:30:14,771 --> 00:30:15,887 What you looking for? 591 00:30:19,109 --> 00:30:20,109 You. 592 00:30:22,654 --> 00:30:25,943 You were right about Major Lilywhite not being a mass murderer. 593 00:30:26,742 --> 00:30:29,075 Turns out he was just a mass kidnapper. 594 00:30:32,456 --> 00:30:33,456 I've wanted to talk, 595 00:30:33,582 --> 00:30:38,953 but I figured after leaving a dozen messages, the feeling wasn't mutual. 596 00:30:39,713 --> 00:30:41,625 Didn't seem like much for me to say. 597 00:30:43,425 --> 00:30:44,425 Still doesn't. 598 00:30:47,054 --> 00:30:48,920 Unless you have something new to add. 599 00:30:58,231 --> 00:30:59,231 How about this? 600 00:31:02,069 --> 00:31:03,651 I haven't stopped thinking about you. 601 00:31:06,031 --> 00:31:09,866 I'm absolutely lost without you. 602 00:31:12,412 --> 00:31:13,869 I meant about the case. 603 00:31:21,338 --> 00:31:22,624 My Uber is here. 604 00:31:23,548 --> 00:31:25,414 So, about this new case, uh, 605 00:31:26,885 --> 00:31:27,921 you like anyone for it? 606 00:31:29,388 --> 00:31:31,004 It's my case, Clive. 607 00:31:32,557 --> 00:31:35,220 And I'm afraid I can't trust you with that information. 608 00:31:53,787 --> 00:31:55,198 Thanks for the brain mush. 609 00:31:55,664 --> 00:31:59,078 That is the first time anyone has ever been thanked for that stuff. 610 00:31:59,292 --> 00:32:01,454 I just really want to be myself for Justin tonight. 611 00:32:01,711 --> 00:32:04,704 No prob. I've got a freezer full of Z-rations since I took the cure. 612 00:32:06,800 --> 00:32:08,541 She discards the empty tube, 613 00:32:09,052 --> 00:32:12,511 eager to escape the clutches of the Dungeon Master's brain, but knowing that... 614 00:32:15,851 --> 00:32:17,092 Don't narrate. Just be. 615 00:32:19,479 --> 00:32:20,720 Here. Take these. 616 00:32:20,939 --> 00:32:22,896 Don't let me have them back, even if I beg. 617 00:32:29,322 --> 00:32:30,858 Whoa. 618 00:32:31,116 --> 00:32:33,529 You look... 619 00:32:33,743 --> 00:32:35,359 The young woman melts 620 00:32:35,579 --> 00:32:38,413 as her suitor makes sounds indicating that her dress is a success. 621 00:32:38,623 --> 00:32:39,623 Yeah. 622 00:32:40,041 --> 00:32:41,041 I should get going. 623 00:32:41,209 --> 00:32:42,889 That video game's not going to play itself. 624 00:32:44,588 --> 00:32:46,955 Sorry you're not helping out with security. 625 00:32:47,174 --> 00:32:48,915 Baracus is already down in the polls. 626 00:32:48,925 --> 00:32:51,008 He doesn't want the Chaos Killer at his fundraiser. 627 00:32:51,261 --> 00:32:52,502 More shrimp for me. 628 00:32:54,890 --> 00:32:57,473 So, what do you even do at a political fundraiser? 629 00:32:57,684 --> 00:33:01,394 - I'm pretty sure it's all about hobnobbing. - Bring it on. 630 00:33:02,189 --> 00:33:05,273 Look alive, boys! Messerschmitts at 10 o'clock! 631 00:33:07,652 --> 00:33:09,644 Two more coming your way, Shorty! 632 00:33:12,991 --> 00:33:14,948 Number three is hit, Cap! Shut 'er down! 633 00:33:15,744 --> 00:33:18,532 Here comes another, almost in range. 634 00:33:19,247 --> 00:33:21,614 Don't be shy, Fritz. I got a little present for you. 635 00:33:23,960 --> 00:33:28,330 See you in hell, you Nazi bastard! 636 00:33:28,548 --> 00:33:30,540 Dude, how much brain did you take? 637 00:33:32,844 --> 00:33:35,382 Direct hit! We're going down! 638 00:33:36,515 --> 00:33:37,722 Bail out! 639 00:33:47,442 --> 00:33:48,774 He'll be okay, right? 640 00:33:49,611 --> 00:33:51,568 Don't care. 641 00:34:10,966 --> 00:34:12,457 I've got first shift. 642 00:34:12,676 --> 00:34:14,668 - See you after work, honey? - Keep us safe. 643 00:34:21,268 --> 00:34:22,554 Liv Moore, 644 00:34:22,769 --> 00:34:25,512 I'd like you to meet the new head of Fillmore-Graves, Chase Graves. 645 00:34:25,730 --> 00:34:28,894 Mr. Graves, I am so sorry about Vivian. I greatly admired... 646 00:34:29,109 --> 00:34:31,109 Where do we stand on the Tuttle-Reid investigation? 647 00:34:32,237 --> 00:34:35,401 Well, there's a group here in Seattle that believes zombies escaped... 648 00:34:35,615 --> 00:34:37,655 From the Max Rager party. I know. I've been briefed. 649 00:34:38,034 --> 00:34:41,274 Do you have hard evidence that can put them away for murdering that zombie family? 650 00:34:41,663 --> 00:34:45,623 Not yet. But we've got someone on the inside of Harley Johns' group. 651 00:34:45,625 --> 00:34:47,582 You do understand the urgency, don't you? 652 00:34:47,794 --> 00:34:49,230 Zombie Island won't be ready for some time. 653 00:34:49,254 --> 00:34:51,746 If D-Day happens before we're ready, we could face extinction. 654 00:34:51,965 --> 00:34:52,965 I know this. 655 00:34:53,174 --> 00:34:56,463 My partner and I are risking our careers to pursue it on our own time. 656 00:34:56,678 --> 00:34:58,010 It's not even our case. 657 00:34:58,221 --> 00:35:00,634 Your partner. A human who you told about us. 658 00:35:00,849 --> 00:35:02,556 A human who risked his life for zombies. 659 00:35:02,767 --> 00:35:04,447 Who gave up the woman he loved for zombies. 660 00:35:04,644 --> 00:35:05,976 Yeah. That guy. 661 00:35:09,649 --> 00:35:10,765 That's a great dress. 662 00:35:11,818 --> 00:35:15,061 Carey. I should probably meet this mayoral candidate we're bankrolling. 663 00:35:15,822 --> 00:35:17,438 Nice meeting you, Miss Moore. 664 00:35:17,657 --> 00:35:20,240 Having one of our own on the force is good for us all. 665 00:35:25,123 --> 00:35:26,614 Why don't we have any drinks yet? 666 00:35:26,833 --> 00:35:30,452 What happened? I thought you were getting ready at home and coming with us. 667 00:35:30,670 --> 00:35:33,003 I had too much to do. I came here straight from work. 668 00:35:33,214 --> 00:35:35,922 From now on, could you at least pretend that this takes some effort? 669 00:35:37,552 --> 00:35:38,552 Free booze! 670 00:35:38,887 --> 00:35:42,005 Oh, uh, grab me a Scotch. I need to talk to my boss. 671 00:35:47,604 --> 00:35:49,524 - All right. Who's gonna be the next mayor? - Me! 672 00:35:49,731 --> 00:35:51,188 Oh! 673 00:35:51,441 --> 00:35:52,977 Thank you very much. Thank you. 674 00:35:56,363 --> 00:35:57,363 Great stuff. 675 00:35:57,530 --> 00:35:59,317 Auction begins in 90 minutes. 676 00:35:59,532 --> 00:36:01,148 Until then, I'll keep Buck. 677 00:36:01,409 --> 00:36:02,409 You work the crowd. 678 00:36:02,619 --> 00:36:05,362 Oh, and, um, Chase wants to meet you when you have a minute. 679 00:36:05,538 --> 00:36:08,656 - Who? - Only the most important zombie on this planet. 680 00:36:08,875 --> 00:36:09,875 Right. Chase Graves. 681 00:36:10,085 --> 00:36:11,451 Endeavor to impress. 682 00:36:11,670 --> 00:36:13,536 Okay. We'll see you soon. 683 00:36:13,755 --> 00:36:15,667 Hey, Daniel. Good to see you. 684 00:36:15,882 --> 00:36:17,339 - Thanks for coming out. - Floyd. 685 00:36:17,550 --> 00:36:19,028 Sorry to interrupt with an office matter, 686 00:36:19,052 --> 00:36:20,612 but you haven't been around much lately. 687 00:36:20,720 --> 00:36:22,677 I just... I had a few questions to run by you. 688 00:36:22,889 --> 00:36:24,755 - Yeah. - On the Weckler case. 689 00:36:26,393 --> 00:36:27,554 The murdered dominatrix. 690 00:36:28,478 --> 00:36:29,478 We have a confession. 691 00:36:30,230 --> 00:36:31,937 There's something fishy about it. 692 00:36:32,607 --> 00:36:35,850 My old boss used to tell me, "When you win a case, get out of the courtroom." 693 00:36:37,529 --> 00:36:38,529 Let it go. 694 00:36:39,406 --> 00:36:40,647 Go have some fun, Peyton. 695 00:36:41,491 --> 00:36:42,491 Hey. 696 00:36:46,746 --> 00:36:50,535 - Well, that went over like a fart in a phone booth. - What? 697 00:36:50,750 --> 00:36:52,728 I just tried to ask my boss about the murdered dominatrix case, 698 00:36:52,752 --> 00:36:55,119 and he practically sprinted away. Told me to drop it. 699 00:36:55,797 --> 00:36:57,517 Maybe that has something to do with the fact 700 00:36:57,549 --> 00:37:00,633 that your boss was one of the dominatrix's clients. 701 00:37:03,138 --> 00:37:04,138 Tell me everything. 702 00:37:13,648 --> 00:37:15,560 Hey, Doc. You got a minute? 703 00:37:17,026 --> 00:37:18,026 Uh... 704 00:37:20,488 --> 00:37:22,195 We caught ourselves a zombie. 705 00:37:22,407 --> 00:37:24,447 What happened to waiting until I finish the vaccine? 706 00:37:24,617 --> 00:37:26,929 You know, we've got our eyes on all those Chaos Killer zombies. 707 00:37:26,953 --> 00:37:29,115 They've got security details, and those security details 708 00:37:29,122 --> 00:37:30,988 all end up at the same underground bar. 709 00:37:31,207 --> 00:37:32,573 That's where we found this one. 710 00:37:32,792 --> 00:37:34,954 Alone, wandering around. Pretty out of it. 711 00:37:35,170 --> 00:37:36,752 Figured you'd have tranquilizers. 712 00:37:37,005 --> 00:37:39,233 We need something to mellow out this freak without killing it. 713 00:37:39,257 --> 00:37:40,543 You're sure you captured a... 714 00:37:43,219 --> 00:37:44,219 Zombie? 715 00:37:44,679 --> 00:37:45,679 Pretty damn sure. 716 00:37:55,607 --> 00:37:59,271 It's time to stop feeling lethargic, bloated, gassy and foggy-headed. 717 00:37:59,486 --> 00:38:02,399 Take the cleanse, the Mega Bio Muesli cleanse. 718 00:38:22,675 --> 00:38:23,756 Hey, there. 719 00:38:24,385 --> 00:38:27,002 Guess who's off duty and ready to hobnob his ass off. 720 00:38:27,222 --> 00:38:28,222 Really? 721 00:38:28,431 --> 00:38:29,922 'Cause I'm all hobnobbed out. 722 00:38:30,141 --> 00:38:34,055 And I was hoping to take some Fillmore-Graves soldier home, make love, 723 00:38:34,270 --> 00:38:38,856 and immediately fall asleep without a follow-up conversation. 724 00:38:39,067 --> 00:38:40,148 Check, please! 725 00:38:40,985 --> 00:38:41,771 Oh, look. 726 00:38:41,986 --> 00:38:44,899 It's your new boss chitchatting with the zombie-who-would-be-mayor 727 00:38:45,114 --> 00:38:46,776 if he weren't such a terrible candidate. 728 00:38:47,033 --> 00:38:48,365 Have you met Chase Graves, yet? 729 00:38:48,576 --> 00:38:49,862 I'm not sure what I think. 730 00:38:50,078 --> 00:38:52,411 I have met him. The day he arrived, in fact. 731 00:38:53,373 --> 00:38:55,615 He found out we stole a six pack of Super Max, 732 00:38:55,834 --> 00:38:56,894 and he shot me in the chest. 733 00:38:56,918 --> 00:38:57,954 He did not. 734 00:38:58,670 --> 00:39:01,670 Liv, this is sweet, but there could not be nothing worse for me than... Liv! 735 00:39:01,840 --> 00:39:02,840 Liv! 736 00:39:10,557 --> 00:39:11,557 Dad! 737 00:39:12,350 --> 00:39:13,466 Stay down. 738 00:39:15,478 --> 00:39:17,435 - Take the boy. I've got Baracus. - I'm on it. 739 00:39:17,689 --> 00:39:19,476 Floyd. Let Carey take your boy. 740 00:39:19,691 --> 00:39:21,023 You need to calm down. 741 00:39:21,234 --> 00:39:22,234 Let's go, Buck. 742 00:39:22,402 --> 00:39:23,563 Your dad's gonna be fine. 743 00:39:24,195 --> 00:39:25,195 Eyes on me. 744 00:39:26,030 --> 00:39:28,397 Deep, steady breaths. 745 00:39:28,616 --> 00:39:29,857 Miss, I'm a doctor! 746 00:39:30,076 --> 00:39:32,113 So am I. Stay out of my way! 747 00:40:00,732 --> 00:40:03,065 - Shawna. - Major. 748 00:40:03,318 --> 00:40:04,650 Chaos Killer in the flesh. 749 00:40:05,653 --> 00:40:06,653 Come on in. 750 00:40:16,581 --> 00:40:20,040 The man was willing to literally take a bullet for his son. 751 00:40:20,251 --> 00:40:21,811 Can you imagine what that would be like, 752 00:40:21,878 --> 00:40:23,710 growing up with a father that cares that much? 753 00:40:24,297 --> 00:40:26,459 Yeah. Me, neither. 754 00:40:27,425 --> 00:40:28,425 Hungry? 755 00:40:33,681 --> 00:40:35,923 That's from an impotent proctologist, by the way. 756 00:40:37,018 --> 00:40:38,018 Enjoy. 757 00:40:40,021 --> 00:40:42,809 Taking that bullet should do wonders for Baracus' poll numbers. 758 00:40:43,816 --> 00:40:45,148 And a zombie mayor? 759 00:40:46,235 --> 00:40:47,817 That'll help me as well. 760 00:40:49,322 --> 00:40:50,322 You see what I did there? 761 00:40:53,618 --> 00:40:55,154 Oh, Father, 762 00:40:55,370 --> 00:40:58,033 I'm so glad you're still around to experience this. 763 00:40:58,289 --> 00:41:00,451 It's like all my wishes are coming true. 764 00:41:26,567 --> 00:41:28,809 Welcome back to the United States. 765 00:41:29,028 --> 00:41:31,111 How long are you gonna be in Seattle? 766 00:41:31,114 --> 00:41:33,777 Just long enough to get my money and settle some old debts. 767 00:41:36,035 --> 00:41:37,822 Tell your ma hi for me, will you, Spence? 58242

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