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What's up ball taggers and teaaggers?
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What's up ball taggers and teaaggers?
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What's up ball taggers and teaaggers?
I'm Desi Light
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I'm Desi Light
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I'm Desi Light
>> and I'm Jordan Cleper. This is Sports
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>> and I'm Jordan Cleper. This is Sports
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>> and I'm Jordan Cleper. This is Sports
War, the show where we are legally not
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War, the show where we are legally not
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War, the show where we are legally not
allowed to agree with each other.
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allowed to agree with each other.
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allowed to agree with each other.
>> So if I say ice hockey is the best kind
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>> So if I say ice hockey is the best kind
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>> So if I say ice hockey is the best kind
of hockey,
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of hockey,
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of hockey,
>> then I say screw that, it's tonsil
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>> then I say screw that, it's tonsil
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>> then I say screw that, it's tonsil
hockey. I've been told by multiple
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hockey. I've been told by multiple
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hockey. I've been told by multiple
people it's the best kind of hockey and
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people it's the best kind of hockey and
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people it's the best kind of hockey and
one day I'll get my shots.
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Moving on, we're halfway through March
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Moving on, we're halfway through March
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Moving on, we're halfway through March
and my pee is green, which I hope is
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and my pee is green, which I hope is
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and my pee is green, which I hope is
from St. Patty's Day, but it also means
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from St. Patty's Day, but it also means
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from St. Patty's Day, but it also means
that March Madness is upon us. And this
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that March Madness is upon us. And this
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that March Madness is upon us. And this
year, there's a foolproof way to pick
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year, there's a foolproof way to pick
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year, there's a foolproof way to pick
the winner.
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the winner.
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the winner.
>> March Madness is just two days away. And
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>> March Madness is just two days away. And
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>> March Madness is just two days away. And
if you haven't done so yet, it's time to
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if you haven't done so yet, it's time to
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if you haven't done so yet, it's time to
fill out those brackets.
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fill out those brackets.
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fill out those brackets.
>> This season though, some people are
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>> This season though, some people are
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>> This season though, some people are
turning to AI to create the best
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turning to AI to create the best
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turning to AI to create the best
bracket.
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bracket.
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bracket.
>> Not only can AI better inform your
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>> Not only can AI better inform your
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>> Not only can AI better inform your
picks, it actually gives you better odds
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picks, it actually gives you better odds
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picks, it actually gives you better odds
of avoiding that dreaded bracket buster.
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of avoiding that dreaded bracket buster.
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of avoiding that dreaded bracket buster.
>> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? NO. NO. THIS is
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>> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? NO. NO. THIS is
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>> WHAT? WHAT? WHAT? NO. NO. THIS is
madness. and and not good madness like
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madness. and and not good madness like
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madness. and and not good madness like
March madness, bad madness like what
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March madness, bad madness like what
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March madness, bad madness like what
China lab has. No,
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China lab has. No,
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China lab has. No,
AI should not be settling our brackets.
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AI should not be settling our brackets.
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AI should not be settling our brackets.
Whatever happened to just picking the
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Whatever happened to just picking the
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Whatever happened to just picking the
school with the hottest mascots? Plus, I
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school with the hottest mascots? Plus, I
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school with the hottest mascots? Plus, I
tried using Grock to fill out my bracket
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tried using Grock to fill out my bracket
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tried using Grock to fill out my bracket
and it just warned me that Jewish teams
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and it just warned me that Jewish teams
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and it just warned me that Jewish teams
control the weather.
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control the weather.
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control the weather.
Jordan, you drooling giraffe. AI picking
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Jordan, you drooling giraffe. AI picking
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Jordan, you drooling giraffe. AI picking
college basketball is the future I've
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college basketball is the future I've
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college basketball is the future I've
been waiting for. Letting AI write my
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been waiting for. Letting AI write my
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been waiting for. Letting AI write my
bracket means I finally have the time to
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bracket means I finally have the time to
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bracket means I finally have the time to
do things that I love, like letting AI
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do things that I love, like letting AI
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do things that I love, like letting AI
my husband.
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my husband.
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my husband.
Thanks, AI. I haven't had a fake
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Thanks, AI. I haven't had a fake
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Thanks, AI. I haven't had a fake
headache in 6 months.
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headache in 6 months.
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headache in 6 months.
And that brings us to my slot prop of
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And that brings us to my slot prop of
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And that brings us to my slot prop of
the night. Who will Grock pick to win
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the night. Who will Grock pick to win
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the night. Who will Grock pick to win
March Madness? Brought to you by
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March Madness? Brought to you by
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March Madness? Brought to you by
gambling. Gambling, it's a hobby and an
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gambling. Gambling, it's a hobby and an
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gambling. Gambling, it's a hobby and an
addiction. It's a hobby addiction.
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addiction. It's a hobby addiction.
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addiction. It's a hobby addiction.
Let's move on to baseball, America's
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Let's move on to baseball, America's
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Let's move on to baseball, America's
favorite sport in 1945.
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favorite sport in 1945.
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favorite sport in 1945.
Well, last night at the World Baseball
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Well, last night at the World Baseball
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Well, last night at the World Baseball
Classic, Venezuela kidnapped a win from
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Classic, Venezuela kidnapped a win from
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Classic, Venezuela kidnapped a win from
the USA.
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the USA.
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the USA.
>> The World Baseball Classic stunner for
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>> The World Baseball Classic stunner for
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>> The World Baseball Classic stunner for
Team USA. Venezuela scored the go-ahead
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Team USA. Venezuela scored the go-ahead
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Team USA. Venezuela scored the go-ahead
run late and shut down the Americans in
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run late and shut down the Americans in
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run late and shut down the Americans in
the bottom of the ninth to win three to
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the bottom of the ninth to win three to
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the bottom of the ninth to win three to
two. It is Team Venezuela's first
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two. It is Team Venezuela's first
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two. It is Team Venezuela's first
championship at the World Baseball
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championship at the World Baseball
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championship at the World Baseball
Classic.
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Classic.
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Classic.
>> What? What? America lost the World
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>> What? What? America lost the World
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>> What? What? America lost the World
Baseball Classic? Something I just
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Baseball Classic? Something I just
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Baseball Classic? Something I just
learned ABOUT 4 SECONDS AGO? I will
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learned ABOUT 4 SECONDS AGO? I will
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learned ABOUT 4 SECONDS AGO? I will
never get over this. Being humiliated on
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never get over this. Being humiliated on
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never get over this. Being humiliated on
the world stage is something we do on
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the world stage is something we do on
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the world stage is something we do on
the battlefield, not the baseball field.
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the battlefield, not the baseball field.
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the battlefield, not the baseball field.
Shame on America's mostly Cuban and
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Shame on America's mostly Cuban and
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Shame on America's mostly Cuban and
Dominican team for losing to Venezuela.
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Dominican team for losing to Venezuela.
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Dominican team for losing to Venezuela.
>> Actually, Desi, it was mostly white
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>> Actually, Desi, it was mostly white
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>> Actually, Desi, it was mostly white
Americans on our team.
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Americans on our team.
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Americans on our team.
>> What were we EVEN TRYING TO WIN?
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>> What were we EVEN TRYING TO WIN?
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>> What were we EVEN TRYING TO WIN?
DESI, DESI, did you staple your wig to
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DESI, DESI, did you staple your wig to
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DESI, DESI, did you staple your wig to
your brain again? Come on. It's fine
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your brain again? Come on. It's fine
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your brain again? Come on. It's fine
that Venezuela won the WBC. Venezuela is
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that Venezuela won the WBC. Venezuela is
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that Venezuela won the WBC. Venezuela is
going to be part of America in a few
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going to be part of America in a few
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going to be part of America in a few
weeks. So either way, that trophy IS
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weeks. So either way, that trophy IS
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weeks. So either way, that trophy IS
OURS. WE DID IT, BOYS.
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OURS. WE DID IT, BOYS.
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OURS. WE DID IT, BOYS.
>> WHICH brings us to our wallet invasion
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>> WHICH brings us to our wallet invasion
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>> WHICH brings us to our wallet invasion
bet of the night. Which soon to be US
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bet of the night. Which soon to be US
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bet of the night. Which soon to be US
state will win the World Cup? Brought to
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state will win the World Cup? Brought to
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state will win the World Cup? Brought to
you by gambling. Gambling. You can bet
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you by gambling. Gambling. You can bet
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you by gambling. Gambling. You can bet
on war. Now,
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on war. Now,
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on war. Now,
>> moving on to the only thing more
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>> moving on to the only thing more
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>> moving on to the only thing more
American than baseball, strippers.
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American than baseball, strippers.
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American than baseball, strippers.
>> The NBA has cancelled a strip club
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>> The NBA has cancelled a strip club
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>> The NBA has cancelled a strip club
promotion planned by the Atlanta Hawks.
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promotion planned by the Atlanta Hawks.
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promotion planned by the Atlanta Hawks.
>> The team had planned to celebrate
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>> The team had planned to celebrate
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>> The team had planned to celebrate
Atlanta's Magic City Strip Club. They
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Atlanta's Magic City Strip Club. They
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Atlanta's Magic City Strip Club. They
said it was going to be a tribute to the
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said it was going to be a tribute to the
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said it was going to be a tribute to the
iconic cultural institution.
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iconic cultural institution.
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iconic cultural institution.
Oh, good for you NBA for cancelling this
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Oh, good for you NBA for cancelling this
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Oh, good for you NBA for cancelling this
promotion.
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promotion.
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promotion.
Don't get me wrong, I love and fully
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Don't get me wrong, I love and fully
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Don't get me wrong, I love and fully
support the idea of including more women
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support the idea of including more women
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support the idea of including more women
in the NBA, but this is not the way to
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in the NBA, but this is not the way to
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in the NBA, but this is not the way to
do it. If it were up to me, women would
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do it. If it were up to me, women would
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do it. If it were up to me, women would
get their own league where they get to
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get their own league where they get to
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get their own league where they get to
play basketball.
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We could call it something catchy like
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We could call it something catchy like
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We could call it something catchy like
the NBA for women or girls be hooping.
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the NBA for women or girls be hooping.
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the NBA for women or girls be hooping.
I'm an ally. Hold for applause.
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I'm an ally. Hold for applause.
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I'm an ally. Hold for applause.
>> How about you hold my nuts in your
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>> How about you hold my nuts in your
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>> How about you hold my nuts in your
mouth?
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Not only should the NBA have kept this
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Not only should the NBA have kept this
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Not only should the NBA have kept this
promotion, they should have gone
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promotion, they should have gone
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promotion, they should have gone
further. I want an NBA game with the
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further. I want an NBA game with the
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further. I want an NBA game with the
full strip club experience. Lap dances
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full strip club experience. Lap dances
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full strip club experience. Lap dances
in the nosebleleeds. Taking out cash
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in the nosebleleeds. Taking out cash
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in the nosebleleeds. Taking out cash
from an ATM with a $79 service fee.
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from an ATM with a $79 service fee.
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from an ATM with a $79 service fee.
Turning location sharing off on my
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Turning location sharing off on my
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Turning location sharing off on my
phone. Wiping the glitter off my face
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phone. Wiping the glitter off my face
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phone. Wiping the glitter off my face
with a rally towel. Using a FOAM FINGER
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with a rally towel. Using a FOAM FINGER
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with a rally towel. Using a FOAM FINGER
TO
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TO
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TO
>> DAZZY DAZZY. OKAY. OKAY. STOP.
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>> DAZZY DAZZY. OKAY. OKAY. STOP.
231
00:04:36,479 --> 00:04:38,629
>> DAZZY DAZZY. OKAY. OKAY. STOP.
Which brings us to our making it rain
232
00:04:38,629 --> 00:04:38,639
Which brings us to our making it rain
233
00:04:38,639 --> 00:04:40,629
Which brings us to our making it rain
bet of the week. Which Magic City
234
00:04:40,629 --> 00:04:40,639
bet of the week. Which Magic City
235
00:04:40,639 --> 00:04:42,550
bet of the week. Which Magic City
stripper will fall off the pole first?
236
00:04:42,550 --> 00:04:42,560
stripper will fall off the pole first?
237
00:04:42,560 --> 00:04:45,990
stripper will fall off the pole first?
Brought to you by gambling. Gambling.
238
00:04:45,990 --> 00:04:46,000
Brought to you by gambling. Gambling.
239
00:04:46,000 --> 00:04:49,189
Brought to you by gambling. Gambling.
100 NBA refs can't be wrong.
240
00:04:49,189 --> 00:04:49,199
100 NBA refs can't be wrong.
241
00:04:49,199 --> 00:04:50,469
100 NBA refs can't be wrong.
>> Well, that's all the time we have for
242
00:04:50,469 --> 00:04:50,479
>> Well, that's all the time we have for
243
00:04:50,479 --> 00:04:52,310
>> Well, that's all the time we have for
Sports War. Join us next week as we
244
00:04:52,310 --> 00:04:52,320
Sports War. Join us next week as we
245
00:04:52,320 --> 00:04:54,629
Sports War. Join us next week as we
debate if Airbud is the greatest animal
246
00:04:54,629 --> 00:04:54,639
debate if Airbud is the greatest animal
247
00:04:54,639 --> 00:04:56,629
debate if Airbud is the greatest animal
athlete of all time.
248
00:04:56,629 --> 00:04:56,639
athlete of all time.
249
00:04:56,639 --> 00:04:58,790
athlete of all time.
>> No way. I know a salamander named Joe
250
00:04:58,790 --> 00:04:58,800
>> No way. I know a salamander named Joe
251
00:04:58,800 --> 00:05:02,550
>> No way. I know a salamander named Joe
that is sick at hockey.
252
00:05:02,550 --> 00:05:02,560
that is sick at hockey.
253
00:05:02,560 --> 00:05:13,510
that is sick at hockey.
A
254
00:05:13,510 --> 00:05:13,520
255
00:05:13,520 --> 00:05:16,520
heat.
22214
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